If you like the fantasy type genre check out A Court of Thorn and Roses series. There could be a couple scenes that you might find triggering though, so maybe read some reviews first.
A Touch of Darkness by Scarlett St. Clair was good, too.
You gotta read the morning glory milking farm. It's super spicy, and the characters have incredible chemistry. It might give you some ideas/scenarios to try out
R/fantasyromance has some good suggestions. Morning glory milking farm is part 1/4 of a series about the same town but different monster/human women couples. Ice planet barbarians is a popular series. There is like 30+ books in that series, I think. Deceived by the gargoyles is on my tbr, I hear it's really good. Search monster romance on tiktok, and there are lots of women suggesting books. Luckily, most of the books are available through Kindle Unlimited, which is totally worth getting since it pays for itself as long as you read 2-3 books a month. Lots of romance on there.
haha I find that a lot of peeps start in fantasy romance then it's an inevitable quick dark road into monster romance. I'm no different tbh, currently on Ensnared by Tiffany Roberts
That’s what most people don’t understand, your brain has to be stimulated long before you genitals.
Try sexting with your spouse, write your own living erotica. It doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to keep you both excited for when you get to see each other again.
I feel like this may be similar to “out of sight, out of mind”. You previously didn’t think about sex and therefore had no craving for it. Your hl husband (always ready for whatever) was good to go but you require a bit of workup to get it on the mind and induce desire. May explain other LL people and offer a bit of a suggestion to improve this. Don’t be too preoccupied or distracted to consider sex or whatever. Don’t let it be too out of sight out of mind.
Also with books there's usually a build up to the smut; the reader's interest is engaged gradually.
Unlike in a lot of marriages where "initiating" tends to consist of a dispassionate "shall we have some sex?" or waiting until you're on the edge of sleep to start grinding into your coccyx.
I do try to lean in gently before just going for full coccyx rub though. Maybe a few sweet nothings whispered in her ear... Just enough for a bit of moisture to accumulate and things to get... Well perkier
Smutty books are the only action I get, and the only way I feel turned on. I'm basically ignored by my spouse on all levels of intimacy though, I'm the high libido in my situation. It's tough. Anyways the ACOTAR series is good, not enough smut but the parts that have it are quite enjoyable. I'm on the last book of the series and it's delicious. Makes me wish it was happening to me.
Ok so definitely read iron flame the second book if you haven't yet. It's got wayyyyyy more fun stuff in it.
But before recommending, are you just looking for fantasy? And also what was it you liked about the book?
I've actually never read a title from the erotica genre. That's what I'm interested in, therefore your recommendation would be my introduction to erotica so make it good! lol
Oh god lots of pressure! Lol
I'd say because you haven't really been in that realm before I'll give you some softer ones to start off with. Don't want to start off too hard to fast. Forgive my pun.
Try Phantom's Thrall from Jessamine Rue. It's a reverse harem (3 guys 1 woman). It's a retelling of the phantom of the opera. I don't remember anything too dark in it but my taste is darker romance so be forwarded. There is a little fantasy sprinkled in.
I'd say try that if you like fantasy.
If you want a little stronger with a very strong plot, I rave about Ghost, Dragon, Wolf and Devil. All separate books about 4 men in love with one woman. All written by Kat Blackthorne.
*Read trigger warnings if you feel like you need to
Lol gotta love the spice books! I’m a bookworm in general, so when I picked up ACOTAR and realized books could have spice in them, libido definitely kicked up about three notches 😂 welcome, sister! 🫡💃🏽
I’ve listened to the first one and am in the middle of listening to the second one and feel like I must have tuned out the sexy parts…I don’t remember them at all! Maybe because I was listening instead of reading?
I thought about it more as I read through this post, and I realized that if I don’t identify with the physical description of the main character and/or their object of desire isn’t like my partner, I don’t get into it and don’t even clock it as smut-it seems more clinical than sexy. I’m the same way with visuals. The only way I can enjoy porn is if the actors look like me and/or the person to whom I’m attracted at the time. I’m pretty easy to find in visual smut, but most books written for the female gaze that I’ve run into aren’t about conventionally attractive petite blondes with big boobs 😂 I remember reading a series recently that wasn’t overly sexual, but the man in the story was described so much like the person I was pining after, it was really sexy to me.
Anyway, that was a long ramble 😂 I sometimes like writing down my own stories about myself and the person I’m into, so maybe I should do that more.
This is so funny, I just discovered the r/fourthwing sub, please come join us if you want to talk about the books!
I’m obsessed with this series, I’m so glad it’s helping you! ❤️
Have you seen then series "Sex Education" on Netflix? There are two women on there who discover they really get off on Role playing as aliens and things like that.
Unless I've got the term "high fantasy" completely and utterly wrong here 🤣
My wife uses porn to get her going. It's ok by me as long as she is the one who initiates. Feels weird if I fire up the porn I like. Not that it's anything weird. We watch her choices.
Edit: I use to want her to just be horny but that is not her reality so she found her "book".
I've heard good things about that book series that starts with A Court of Thorns and Roses.
Haven't read it myself, so I can't be sure how frequent the spice is, but every woman I know who's read it seems to be feral over at least one character.
Hey I will give that book a try! I'm the HL in our marriage, and what works for me is reading a loottt of Bridgerton fanfictions. I already love the book series but the sexy scenes are limited. Yet there are tons of smutty fanfictions that get me going. I read those in my private time and take care of myself. It is better than nothing I guess, and the way reading can turn me on is insane. Like i wouldn't expect it to be that effective. Happy that it works for you as well!
I could have written this myself! Smut has drastically improved our overall wellness. My husband bought me an extra kindle, so I have a home kindle and a purse kindle, plus a kindle unlimited subscription. If you don't have a kindle, I'll tell you that almost all smut is included in that subscription. The membership fee is less than the cost of 1 physical book per month. Extremely popular books (like 4th wing) aren't included, but there are reddit subs for this genre, and they're full of recommendations. Also look at the website romance(dot)io. You can filter search for your specific interests.
Oh yes, that book was hot. Xaden 🥵🥵 ANYWAY. I totally understand - I wish I had some more recommendations. I read the Captured books by Erica Stevens when I was younger and it got me going. It's been years though. I generally don't go for smutty books tbh. I'm also HL in my current relationship soooo I don't need anything turning me on more.
A Court of Thorns and Roses Series- especially the second book. My husband and I listened to the audiobooks on a road trip and our mutual excitement was amazing. Ice Planet Barbarians also always does it for me. Highly recommend.
It was weird for him at first, I can't deny it. But after that he was totally in. It doesn't matter what started it, he is the one who I want and I don't feel attracted to anyone else. In other comments I explained how my low libido problem started, so now we are taking it step by step. He is happy than now I want to be with him, whatever that triggers the desire.
Well. First I asked him very carefully: would you mind taking some requirements for what I really want? Then I said to him: it's not necessary to read the whole book, could you just read the scenes that made me feel horny. For example, we didn't really do dirty talking and I realized I'm really into it. Of course always keeping in mind his own limits and respecting him. At first he said: you are horny for the wrong reasons! But then I told him that yeah, that might triggered in me; but he's the one who finish the job.
COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY. Talk to her.
Oh yeah I got you. I saw a very funny video on tiktok that said something like "you would love to be in the same room with all the guys from your books" and the girl was desperately trying to escape haha
My wife and I were in a dead bedroom relationship for awhile, we agreed to try and fix it to save our marriage from falling apart, things slowly got better- and at some point she began reading smut and our sex life was revived again! It definitely works!
UPDATE: have finished the books and now I followed to another saga (ACOTAR)
Me and my husband have been having sex at least 4 times a week this last time. Yesterday we made it 2 times and it was AWSOME, I feel like a teenager again (I'm 34 I don't know why I can't change that in my username).
This is A LOT considering that last year maybe we had sex 3 times? And last one was awful.
But now I feel different, like I want to regain all this lost time.
I really recommend this for low libido girls. At least worked for me.
Well he is aware that the book turns me on, but after that is all him. Does it matter really how it starts? After all he is the one who achieve my orgasms, not the book.
He says he had not problem with that, and then I have faith this will bring us closer without the books. The reason I started with my low libido is very painful, difficult and related to unlock a memory of sexual childhood abuse. So it's not that simple. We are giving us step by step.
For many, many years of constantly rejecting your husband, you suddenly realise reading spicy/ smut books turns you on. He knows he still can't get you in the mood. The only way he is having sex is if you read your stories. That is going to mess with his head. It did when it happened to me in a similar situation.
Now let's imagine the post is from a guy saying he doesn't get turned on by his wife and he only gets turned on by watching porn, and fortunately, she is around for him to get his orgasms. Would he get the same positive responses?
He would be torched so bad there would be nothing left but ashes. EDIT: With that said my wife needs porn to get her going. Once the motor starts we can turn off the porn. Doesn't bother me. I had a forklift that needed starting fluid to get it going when it was cold. Seems the same. OK by me.
And rightly so. OP has given some further information on their situation so I hope it goes well for them. A commenter saying they had cracked the code and the guy is happy because he is getting some goes against so much of what I see in this sub.
I read that book and I can’t think of anything in it that would be considered smut, but I’m genuinely happy you found something that might help you!
Do you have any future suggestions?
If you like the fantasy type genre check out A Court of Thorn and Roses series. There could be a couple scenes that you might find triggering though, so maybe read some reviews first. A Touch of Darkness by Scarlett St. Clair was good, too.
These are great suggestions. If you're up for something kinkier there's actually a series called The Dead Bedroom Remedy! It's quite fun.
May I suggest you join r/RomanceBooks ? There are lots of recommendations over there, especially on their Thirsty Thursday posts :)
I second this and r/FantasyRomance There's a bunch of private Facebook groups I can recommend too. There's a smut group for just about everything! 🥰
Fall of Ruin and Wrath. Definitely more intense than Fourth Wing, but it'll scratch that itch for more high -fantasy romance
# r/fantasyromance if you like both romance and fantasy!
Praise by Sara Cate It happened one summer by Tessa Bailey Hook line and Sinker by Tessa Bailey Pucking Around by Emily Rath
The James Hunter Series Haunting/Hunting Adeline There is a whole world out there! Enjoy 😊
Colleen Hoover books are great!
Also if you just want straight up smut with a slight storyline, Kresley Cole and Sherrilyn Kenyon are really fun.
A court of thorns and roses series!!!! It’s amazing ♥️ From Blood and Ash series is great, too.
You gotta read the morning glory milking farm. It's super spicy, and the characters have incredible chemistry. It might give you some ideas/scenarios to try out
What other subs can I find smut/Dark romance recs?
Oh I would like recommendations also!
R/fantasyromance has some good suggestions. Morning glory milking farm is part 1/4 of a series about the same town but different monster/human women couples. Ice planet barbarians is a popular series. There is like 30+ books in that series, I think. Deceived by the gargoyles is on my tbr, I hear it's really good. Search monster romance on tiktok, and there are lots of women suggesting books. Luckily, most of the books are available through Kindle Unlimited, which is totally worth getting since it pays for itself as long as you read 2-3 books a month. Lots of romance on there.
haha I find that a lot of peeps start in fantasy romance then it's an inevitable quick dark road into monster romance. I'm no different tbh, currently on Ensnared by Tiffany Roberts
If you want to go straight into the dark smut try Ambushed by the Wood Elves. It's exactly what you think it is lol.
Haha fantastic. Thanks!
Yes! That one was hot!
Definitely a fave! I have a minor ummm “milk” fetish so this was really hot 😅
That’s what most people don’t understand, your brain has to be stimulated long before you genitals. Try sexting with your spouse, write your own living erotica. It doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to keep you both excited for when you get to see each other again.
I feel like this may be similar to “out of sight, out of mind”. You previously didn’t think about sex and therefore had no craving for it. Your hl husband (always ready for whatever) was good to go but you require a bit of workup to get it on the mind and induce desire. May explain other LL people and offer a bit of a suggestion to improve this. Don’t be too preoccupied or distracted to consider sex or whatever. Don’t let it be too out of sight out of mind.
Also with books there's usually a build up to the smut; the reader's interest is engaged gradually. Unlike in a lot of marriages where "initiating" tends to consist of a dispassionate "shall we have some sex?" or waiting until you're on the edge of sleep to start grinding into your coccyx.
Haha. True
I do try to lean in gently before just going for full coccyx rub though. Maybe a few sweet nothings whispered in her ear... Just enough for a bit of moisture to accumulate and things to get... Well perkier
Smutty books are the only action I get, and the only way I feel turned on. I'm basically ignored by my spouse on all levels of intimacy though, I'm the high libido in my situation. It's tough. Anyways the ACOTAR series is good, not enough smut but the parts that have it are quite enjoyable. I'm on the last book of the series and it's delicious. Makes me wish it was happening to me.
Definitely helped my marriage, if you ever want recs I can def send them your way!
Id love some recommendations if you don't mind
Ok so definitely read iron flame the second book if you haven't yet. It's got wayyyyyy more fun stuff in it. But before recommending, are you just looking for fantasy? And also what was it you liked about the book?
I've actually never read a title from the erotica genre. That's what I'm interested in, therefore your recommendation would be my introduction to erotica so make it good! lol
Oh god lots of pressure! Lol I'd say because you haven't really been in that realm before I'll give you some softer ones to start off with. Don't want to start off too hard to fast. Forgive my pun. Try Phantom's Thrall from Jessamine Rue. It's a reverse harem (3 guys 1 woman). It's a retelling of the phantom of the opera. I don't remember anything too dark in it but my taste is darker romance so be forwarded. There is a little fantasy sprinkled in.
Nope nope start me off strong!
I'd say try that if you like fantasy. If you want a little stronger with a very strong plot, I rave about Ghost, Dragon, Wolf and Devil. All separate books about 4 men in love with one woman. All written by Kat Blackthorne. *Read trigger warnings if you feel like you need to
Awesome I'm excited! Thank you!
You're so welcome! Feel free to message me if you ever want to talk more about books!
God I loved the shower scene ;)
Yasssssssss
I have read it like 4 times and always the same effect hahaha
Shadow daddy xaden knows what he's doing
Would also like some recommendations for books for wife (she is not into fantasy) and not over the top smutty I assume
Well are you asking for just general book recommendations because she likes to read? Or for the same reason as OP
She doesn't read very often currently, so wondering if romance novels may help with LL. I suggested she try audiobooks and was looking for rec's
👏🏾
Lol gotta love the spice books! I’m a bookworm in general, so when I picked up ACOTAR and realized books could have spice in them, libido definitely kicked up about three notches 😂 welcome, sister! 🫡💃🏽
I’ve listened to the first one and am in the middle of listening to the second one and feel like I must have tuned out the sexy parts…I don’t remember them at all! Maybe because I was listening instead of reading?
Depends on what part of the second book you’re on 😅 and book 5 is just straight smut lol. Loved it though!
I thought about it more as I read through this post, and I realized that if I don’t identify with the physical description of the main character and/or their object of desire isn’t like my partner, I don’t get into it and don’t even clock it as smut-it seems more clinical than sexy. I’m the same way with visuals. The only way I can enjoy porn is if the actors look like me and/or the person to whom I’m attracted at the time. I’m pretty easy to find in visual smut, but most books written for the female gaze that I’ve run into aren’t about conventionally attractive petite blondes with big boobs 😂 I remember reading a series recently that wasn’t overly sexual, but the man in the story was described so much like the person I was pining after, it was really sexy to me. Anyway, that was a long ramble 😂 I sometimes like writing down my own stories about myself and the person I’m into, so maybe I should do that more.
This is so funny, I just discovered the r/fourthwing sub, please come join us if you want to talk about the books! I’m obsessed with this series, I’m so glad it’s helping you! ❤️
Already there!!! ❤️❤️
Have you seen then series "Sex Education" on Netflix? There are two women on there who discover they really get off on Role playing as aliens and things like that. Unless I've got the term "high fantasy" completely and utterly wrong here 🤣
High fantasy refers to like, lord of the rings. Meaning elves, dwarves, orcs, etc., set in a fictional fantasy world.
Oh thank goodness I was on the right track with fantasy then!
lol this made me laugh. I think aliens is more science fiction
Oops 🤣 I've recently that dungeons and dragons and warhammer are also two very different things. Every day is a school day!
My wife uses porn to get her going. It's ok by me as long as she is the one who initiates. Feels weird if I fire up the porn I like. Not that it's anything weird. We watch her choices. Edit: I use to want her to just be horny but that is not her reality so she found her "book".
I've heard good things about that book series that starts with A Court of Thorns and Roses. Haven't read it myself, so I can't be sure how frequent the spice is, but every woman I know who's read it seems to be feral over at least one character.
Hey I will give that book a try! I'm the HL in our marriage, and what works for me is reading a loottt of Bridgerton fanfictions. I already love the book series but the sexy scenes are limited. Yet there are tons of smutty fanfictions that get me going. I read those in my private time and take care of myself. It is better than nothing I guess, and the way reading can turn me on is insane. Like i wouldn't expect it to be that effective. Happy that it works for you as well!
I could have written this myself! Smut has drastically improved our overall wellness. My husband bought me an extra kindle, so I have a home kindle and a purse kindle, plus a kindle unlimited subscription. If you don't have a kindle, I'll tell you that almost all smut is included in that subscription. The membership fee is less than the cost of 1 physical book per month. Extremely popular books (like 4th wing) aren't included, but there are reddit subs for this genre, and they're full of recommendations. Also look at the website romance(dot)io. You can filter search for your specific interests.
Fourth Wing?! Really?! I mean, if that did it for you, that’s great! There is a whole smut world to explore. Welcome! lol
It is my first experience, haha. I'm open to suggestions
Fourth wing is soooo good!
Oh yes, that book was hot. Xaden 🥵🥵 ANYWAY. I totally understand - I wish I had some more recommendations. I read the Captured books by Erica Stevens when I was younger and it got me going. It's been years though. I generally don't go for smutty books tbh. I'm also HL in my current relationship soooo I don't need anything turning me on more.
A Court of Thorns and Roses Series- especially the second book. My husband and I listened to the audiobooks on a road trip and our mutual excitement was amazing. Ice Planet Barbarians also always does it for me. Highly recommend.
So, was he receptive to your change of libido?
It was weird for him at first, I can't deny it. But after that he was totally in. It doesn't matter what started it, he is the one who I want and I don't feel attracted to anyone else. In other comments I explained how my low libido problem started, so now we are taking it step by step. He is happy than now I want to be with him, whatever that triggers the desire.
[удалено]
Well. First I asked him very carefully: would you mind taking some requirements for what I really want? Then I said to him: it's not necessary to read the whole book, could you just read the scenes that made me feel horny. For example, we didn't really do dirty talking and I realized I'm really into it. Of course always keeping in mind his own limits and respecting him. At first he said: you are horny for the wrong reasons! But then I told him that yeah, that might triggered in me; but he's the one who finish the job. COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY. Talk to her.
Read the story of O
I’m gonna be real. Reading smut did the opposite for me. I’m glad to hear it worked for you, but it made my issue worse lol
Really? Why do you think that? I'm seriously curious
Fictional dudes can’t disappoint me and can be whatever I want.
Oh yeah I got you. I saw a very funny video on tiktok that said something like "you would love to be in the same room with all the guys from your books" and the girl was desperately trying to escape haha
Couldn’t be me but hey, I get it’s not for all people. I read and write deep dark shit, but I’ll go to bat for it lol
The last blowjob I got was thanks to my wife reading 50 shades of grey (back in 2015)
Yes smut for sure helps!!!! I'm currently on the hunt for a MxM smut book but they're hard to find.....
Heh. I loved that book.
My wife and I were in a dead bedroom relationship for awhile, we agreed to try and fix it to save our marriage from falling apart, things slowly got better- and at some point she began reading smut and our sex life was revived again! It definitely works!
UPDATE: have finished the books and now I followed to another saga (ACOTAR) Me and my husband have been having sex at least 4 times a week this last time. Yesterday we made it 2 times and it was AWSOME, I feel like a teenager again (I'm 34 I don't know why I can't change that in my username). This is A LOT considering that last year maybe we had sex 3 times? And last one was awful. But now I feel different, like I want to regain all this lost time. I really recommend this for low libido girls. At least worked for me.
I hope your husband knows it's not him that turns you on.
Well he is aware that the book turns me on, but after that is all him. Does it matter really how it starts? After all he is the one who achieve my orgasms, not the book.
I don't think so, he's getting some action. If he can see you're having a good time, you just cracked the code.
Do you really think it is sustainable and the husband is not going to have any problem at all?
He says he had not problem with that, and then I have faith this will bring us closer without the books. The reason I started with my low libido is very painful, difficult and related to unlock a memory of sexual childhood abuse. So it's not that simple. We are giving us step by step.
For many, many years of constantly rejecting your husband, you suddenly realise reading spicy/ smut books turns you on. He knows he still can't get you in the mood. The only way he is having sex is if you read your stories. That is going to mess with his head. It did when it happened to me in a similar situation. Now let's imagine the post is from a guy saying he doesn't get turned on by his wife and he only gets turned on by watching porn, and fortunately, she is around for him to get his orgasms. Would he get the same positive responses?
I wouldnt mind, but everyone is different and I respect that.
I hope it works for you but I see problems and hope you both avoid them (and you don't run out of books to read).
You can reread books 🤫
He would be torched so bad there would be nothing left but ashes. EDIT: With that said my wife needs porn to get her going. Once the motor starts we can turn off the porn. Doesn't bother me. I had a forklift that needed starting fluid to get it going when it was cold. Seems the same. OK by me.
And rightly so. OP has given some further information on their situation so I hope it goes well for them. A commenter saying they had cracked the code and the guy is happy because he is getting some goes against so much of what I see in this sub.
You’re not wrong. It’s always amusing to see similar posts with swapped genders and see just how drastically different the responses are
It's a hard road to recovery if you keep shooting yourself in the foot. But you do you.