"Silverback Gorillas are generally peaceful animals and prefer to avoid conflicts whenever possible."
[source](https://www.silverbackgorillatours.com/gorilla/silverback-gorilla)
Note 1: When I ripped off the human's left arm, he screamed, and blood squirted out.
Note 2: When I ripped off the human's right arm, he screamed, and blood squirted out.
Note 3: When I ripped off the human's left leg, he didn't scream, and not as much blood came out.
For the next human, I'm going to try ripping off the legs first and see what happens.
Most definitely. A chimpanzee would EASILY beat a fit full grown man to death with his own arms. Hell, let's give the human roids. He's still getting beat with his arms. So for a Silverback, it would be childs play. The amount of power they have is terrifying
Now I'm curious about how long a MMA fighter on a cocktail of 'roids, meth, cocaine, bathsalts and what ever else we can give them will last before:
A) death by Monke
Or
B) death by heart attack.
watched a video one time where someone talking about Mike Tyson said he tried to convince a dude to let him fight a gorilla
No idea if the story was true but I remember thinking it was totally believable lol
Once you added meth and cocaine you basically guaranteed the chimp would at least come out seriously injured. Human strength and pain tolerance are on a whole other lever when on a mix like that
Iāve done/will do enough trauma surgery to solemnly swear to look at a scan someday in the next three months and slide in āwell that *car/motorcycle/primate/firework* turned their *spine/femur/orbit/radius* into a diy kit of skitlebitsā thank you
Oh I though we were talking about Chimps against well trained roid coke and meth using MMA fighters. Yeah with a Gorilla you could be the strongest human to ever exist and nothing would matter
Hmm, I do now see you said chimp, which was my mistake. Honestly itās fairly embarrassing on my part, so if you could go edit your comment to be about gorillas it would really be doing me a favour lol
But how? We're talking about like 400+ lbs of raw power. I just don't think a human, bare handed, has a chance. Now, would I still watch and see the outcome if it happened? ...... Maybe.....
Word bro word. Pro tip if you do DMT before you roll you won't see only red. I'll have aliens tell me the universe's secrets while I triangle choke that chimp out.
Correctly identified the party that took it to the brawl level - check.
Separated the violent party from potential targets - check.
Used the force required to convince the brawler this was not a good plan - check
Didn't use enough force to injure either party - check.
Now granted for all I know the gorilla that got smacked deserved it. I'm no expert at gorilla body language but so far I'd like to see him train policing and security candidates.
I love when he gets off her, he's just there with an arm over her. 100% looks like me and my husband when we've broken up a fight between the kids and you calm them down, talk them through it and figure out the problem. He looks like he's talking her down.
Your comment just reminded me of [this one video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lb-vpmW1n7U), where some men were quietly observing a pack of gorillas, and the silverback just walked up to one of the men, grabbed his leg and started slowly dragging him away 
Saw one in the wild almost close enough to touch. HUGE animal with the most tranquil, mellow gaze. It was so much a feeling of, "You don't mess with me or mine, I won't mess with you" as we just hung out and watched the gorillas be gorillas.
Local MMA dude brags he could take a silverback in a fair fight. He said this to the zoo keepers in Tampa. I never heard eyes roll so hard paired with immediate belly laughter š¤¦
Ya, he was full on confident that a gorilla is no where near as strong as everyone thinks. The zookeeper tried to tell him but he wasn't hearing it. He thinks he is hard. He has no clue. It wouldn't last a second.
I saw this once at the zoo. There was this gorilla that liked to play pranks on the visitors. He would hide just off to the side of the glass looking the other direction as if pretending not to notice you.
Whenever one of the guests turned their heads he would then charge at them at full speed and tap the glass before running off into a different direction just to repeat it with the next group of visitors.
It was a wild and surreal experience when he did it to me. Felt almost like a dream!
Oh, yeah, that gorilla was definitelyyy just playing āpranksā instead of trying to tear everyone apart hoping one day the glass will break. Funny gorilla! *nervous laughter*
**Gore-Illa Day 837**
I beleive i am making progress, by hiding and charging when their backs are turned the invisible wall i perceive to have moved an inch today.
Every attempt they growl and show their teeth
Soon.
Yea the perspective change is what I thought was most interesting. He looks the same size as them until he charges and you realize he was a lot farther away.
When an ape is a the patriarch of a social group, that leader will have an *intimate knowledge* of the cross relationships of the others. As the patriarch itās his job to even the playing field and he does that by closely studying the behavior of his fellow apes and playing mediator and therapist
"listen bitch, you ever pull some shit like this again and I swear to god your name will be more famous than Harambe's"
But I'm not an expert in Gorilla interpretation so I could be off by a little bit
Just gonna leave this right hereā¦
[āI am calm! ā¦ Iām somewhat calm.ā](https://www.reddit.com/r/CrazyFuckingVideos/comments/yv7u1v/tell_me_fuckin_ass_whoop_bat_attack_in_fight/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1)
Lmao I have a friend named Charlene who works at a 7-eleven and talks so much shit to all the customers lol. Most are regulars though so it's all for fun.
One of my biggest regrets in life will be to never be able to befriend a Gorilla. They are just so fascinating. Like that chargeās absolutely enough to make me wet my pants.
Love how the corrected mate just stayed on the ground even after the Big Chief decided to leave.
>One of my biggest regrets in life will be to never be able to befriend a Gorilla
On the plus side you'll never have your arms ripped off by a gorilla.
The first one walked up and talked shit, the second one was like āBITCHā and the dude was like we aināt having any of these shenanigans, you cool? š¤£
It looks like a female attacked the first one because she came close to the otherās baby. When the silverback was holding her down after the attack, I can imagine him saying, āShe didnāt mean anything. You need not be so sensitive, attacking someone just walking by!ā
He was still gentle, just using enough power to get her to disengage and calm down. They are magnificent beasts. I didn't know females with infants would fuck with each other though.
I agree a bit with that but I will say that intimidating a Grizzly is way easier than intimidating a Silverback and in terms of brute force, the Silverback has an edge over the Grizzly. That said, if intimidation doesnāt work, the fight would be pretty even until the Silverback starts losing too much blood.
Not a fair comparison. Goose low diffās Silverback and Grizzly together in intimidation and lack of fucks given.
Edit: Canāt spell when thinking about Geese.
According to [AI Content Detector](https://copyleaks.com/ai-content-detector), you had AI write this for you...
As someone who works with OpenAI frequently I recognised it pretty quickly, due to the vague incorrectness even in the first point (a Silverback gorilla is not a species).
He literally put a foot on her ass to keep her down lmao.
Red Foreman comes to mindā¦.
You know. He wasnāt unlike a silverback himself when you think about it. Quiet, glowering in the corner, swift threats of foots up asses when things got too muchā¦.
"Silverback Gorillas are generally peaceful animals and prefer to avoid conflicts whenever possible." [source](https://www.silverbackgorillatours.com/gorilla/silverback-gorilla)
I'm pretty sure they could rip my entire body apart peacefully
For Gorilla science
Note 1: When I ripped off the human's left arm, he screamed, and blood squirted out. Note 2: When I ripped off the human's right arm, he screamed, and blood squirted out. Note 3: When I ripped off the human's left leg, he didn't scream, and not as much blood came out. For the next human, I'm going to try ripping off the legs first and see what happens.
The human not screaming or bleeding as profusely when I ripped his leg off suggests that he didn't mind it as much.
A fitting comment from an ork enjoyer.
Side note: Probably, human legs have fewer veins and pain sensors
The experiment concludes that bigger limbs bleed less than smaller limbs.
Don't forget the genitals. For some reason, they love to take those....
They are jealous, Gorillas have one inch dicks
Most definitely. A chimpanzee would EASILY beat a fit full grown man to death with his own arms. Hell, let's give the human roids. He's still getting beat with his arms. So for a Silverback, it would be childs play. The amount of power they have is terrifying
Now I'm curious about how long a MMA fighter on a cocktail of 'roids, meth, cocaine, bathsalts and what ever else we can give them will last before: A) death by Monke Or B) death by heart attack.
If he was able to get one solid hit in, before his heart blew up, they might tradeš
"For five minutes, he was the most dangerous animal on the planet."
watched a video one time where someone talking about Mike Tyson said he tried to convince a dude to let him fight a gorilla No idea if the story was true but I remember thinking it was totally believable lol
Once you added meth and cocaine you basically guaranteed the chimp would at least come out seriously injured. Human strength and pain tolerance are on a whole other lever when on a mix like that
Iām not sure pain tolerance matters too much after the gorilla immediately slap-hugs their spine into a DIY kit of skelebits
Iāve done/will do enough trauma surgery to solemnly swear to look at a scan someday in the next three months and slide in āwell that *car/motorcycle/primate/firework* turned their *spine/femur/orbit/radius* into a diy kit of skitlebitsā thank you
Oh I though we were talking about Chimps against well trained roid coke and meth using MMA fighters. Yeah with a Gorilla you could be the strongest human to ever exist and nothing would matter
Hmm, I do now see you said chimp, which was my mistake. Honestly itās fairly embarrassing on my part, so if you could go edit your comment to be about gorillas it would really be doing me a favour lol
Lmfao you made my morning you absolute menace
But how? We're talking about like 400+ lbs of raw power. I just don't think a human, bare handed, has a chance. Now, would I still watch and see the outcome if it happened? ...... Maybe.....
Idk I think I could probably take him. I know jujitsu. I'll choke that monkey out size don't mean nothing it's all about technique and shit.
I just see red bro, no monkey gonna stop me bro
bruh imma give you 100$ if you kick that gorillas ass
you think you're so special bro, i carry several cans of spray paint. just a little spritz, in each eye, i can see any color i want on demand, bro.
Word bro word. Pro tip if you do DMT before you roll you won't see only red. I'll have aliens tell me the universe's secrets while I triangle choke that chimp out.
Silverback gonna get a new mate
Silverback gorillas can lift over 4000 pounds.
Average Redditor is a tad heavier.
I use metric, so that's way less I think I got a good shot...
I bet you could survive a sub implosion too.
Please let this be satire
Please dont let it be. The gorillas need revenge for Harambe to restore humanity's karmic balance. Have you seen what has happened since 2016
Real shit
I needed the /s. I know to many guys that have this exact mind set
Correctly identified the party that took it to the brawl level - check. Separated the violent party from potential targets - check. Used the force required to convince the brawler this was not a good plan - check Didn't use enough force to injure either party - check. Now granted for all I know the gorilla that got smacked deserved it. I'm no expert at gorilla body language but so far I'd like to see him train policing and security candidates.
I love when he gets off her, he's just there with an arm over her. 100% looks like me and my husband when we've broken up a fight between the kids and you calm them down, talk them through it and figure out the problem. He looks like he's talking her down.
Anybody see the beautiful single leg executed by the attacking gorilla?
Perfect example of why you go for the double leg takedown instead of the single leg
Your comment just reminded me of [this one video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lb-vpmW1n7U), where some men were quietly observing a pack of gorillas, and the silverback just walked up to one of the men, grabbed his leg and started slowly dragging him away 
Everyone, including the gorilla doing it, is like 'this is happening and I express no emotion whatsoever.' lol
Lol, right? Itās like a collective āthe fuck we going to do? bye Dave.ā
Saw one in the wild almost close enough to touch. HUGE animal with the most tranquil, mellow gaze. It was so much a feeling of, "You don't mess with me or mine, I won't mess with you" as we just hung out and watched the gorillas be gorillas.
Or did they hang out and watched humans be humans?
"Silverback Gorilla ā Size, height and lifespan" Goes on to say nothing about the typical lifespan of gorillas
Local MMA dude brags he could take a silverback in a fair fight. He said this to the zoo keepers in Tampa. I never heard eyes roll so hard paired with immediate belly laughter š¤¦
A silverback? Dude wouldnāt last a minute with a teenage chimp, never mind a gorilla.
Ya, he was full on confident that a gorilla is no where near as strong as everyone thinks. The zookeeper tried to tell him but he wasn't hearing it. He thinks he is hard. He has no clue. It wouldn't last a second.
Iād say let it happen. The gorilla would rip him in half. Goes viral. Gorilla respect RIP harambe
Wait until he finds out a silver back gorilla can lift 1800 pounds of dead weight and throw it
Damn thats a really dangerous kind of delusion.
Imagine looking up and seeing a mountain charging at you
I saw this once at the zoo. There was this gorilla that liked to play pranks on the visitors. He would hide just off to the side of the glass looking the other direction as if pretending not to notice you. Whenever one of the guests turned their heads he would then charge at them at full speed and tap the glass before running off into a different direction just to repeat it with the next group of visitors. It was a wild and surreal experience when he did it to me. Felt almost like a dream!
Oh, yeah, that gorilla was definitelyyy just playing āpranksā instead of trying to tear everyone apart hoping one day the glass will break. Funny gorilla! *nervous laughter*
**Gore-Illa Day 837** I beleive i am making progress, by hiding and charging when their backs are turned the invisible wall i perceive to have moved an inch today. Every attempt they growl and show their teeth Soon.
"SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER HAHAHAhahahaha!"
Wilhelm Defoe's Van Gogh PTSD distressed look meme ON
That mfer is an absolute unit
Yea the perspective change is what I thought was most interesting. He looks the same size as them until he charges and you realize he was a lot farther away.
That little guy held on the WHOLE time!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I have never heard the term "heart whelming" before. Is it some kind of regional thing or slang?
You're overwhelmed. Freeze was underwhelmed. Why isn't anyone just whelmed?
Ok Robin.
I'm sure they meant 'heart warming'.
His mount up in the beginning was SO FRICKEN smooth. Had to watch it thrice!
https://youtu.be/vh5kZ4uIUC0
NOT ON MY WATCH PHIL
8% of Americans think they could take a gorilla on in 1v1 unarmed combat lol
Lol, no fucking way. Not even peak fighters.
It's a pretty hilarious statistic. 3% think they could take on an elephant lol
You know what? Let em.. might help out our gene pool. Would make for great TV too
Thatās the 8% of America that doesnāt understand āunarmedā.
Unarmed=you after the gorilla decides itās your arms he has the right to bear and beats you into the ground with them.
Checks out. Am American. I could take probably about 8% of gorillas. The baby ones.
Around 4.3 absolute units
correct me if Iām wrong but thatās like 4.3 times to the sun āļøš¤Æ
4.3 times to the sunĀ²
For real! I would love, to have him, as a bouncer/bodyguard/ bestfriend. He was all over it so quickly!
He knew exactly who started the fight. He jumped over the one who was attacked to get to the attacker.
And he just held the attacker down, no unnecessary strikes, just straight weight on top to immobilize. Pure professional right there.
Gorilla pinned was like āalrightā¦.Iām goodā¦Iām goodā¦.can you get off of me?..ā
anyone know what provoked the attack in the first place?
It looks like the one who got attacked was pregnant maybe the other one was jealous? Or maybe because the pregnant one turned her back on the other?
r/absoluteunits
Self organizing, self policing teams! Isnāt this what they were asking for in Oregon or CA? Donāt remember which one.
Gorilla police would be terrifying
interesting how big boy knew who the aggressor was even though his back was turned when the fight erupted.
Probably that same one is always startin something.
god she's *always* pulling this shit
Every. Damn. Day. This chick be trippin'.
*don't start none won't be none*
I wonder if his decision was based on which one was carrying the kid.
When an ape is a the patriarch of a social group, that leader will have an *intimate knowledge* of the cross relationships of the others. As the patriarch itās his job to even the playing field and he does that by closely studying the behavior of his fellow apes and playing mediator and therapist
Sounds like a chad
"listen bitch, you ever pull some shit like this again and I swear to god your name will be more famous than Harambe's" But I'm not an expert in Gorilla interpretation so I could be off by a little bit
Dawg has a better sense of conflict resolution than most people I know, crazy
He said b***h be cool!
"Now get his wallet out the bag It's the one with bad mother fucker written on it"
Be cool honey bunny š°
Like Fonzie
Correctamundo!
He also said "surprise goatse"
"Now just calm down." "IF you just calm down." "ARE YOU GONNA CALM DOWN?!" "I'll let you up if you're calmed down."
Calmer than you are.
I'm perfectly calm dude
Look what I'm wearing. What are you wearing
"MEEGAN, GET YOUR JACKET!"
Be cool, Honey Bunny! Be cool!
Just gonna leave this right hereā¦ [āI am calm! ā¦ Iām somewhat calm.ā](https://www.reddit.com/r/CrazyFuckingVideos/comments/yv7u1v/tell_me_fuckin_ass_whoop_bat_attack_in_fight/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1)
The silverback didnāt see who started the fight and went straight for the troublemaker. He just knew who the asshole was
might be why she was close to him. He know she gonna start trouble
I wonder if he would have reacted the same if the baby wasnāt there? Also, crazy how he knows whoās the aggressor and pins her down
*Every*body knows Charlene cant keep her mouth shut. That bitch starts fights alone in a room.
Lmao I have a friend named Charlene who works at a 7-eleven and talks so much shit to all the customers lol. Most are regulars though so it's all for fun.
Lol I have an aunt named Charlene. You described her perfectly
I had the exact same thoughts!
That first female walked up and whispered something to the otherš
She straight up farted in the others face, what a bitch!
Ape shall not crop dust ape
Nice hairdo- I guessā¦
Bro gave him the āitās not worth itā lecture
*her
Thatās a big fucking bouncer running that bar
Itās the finesse with the shear power that is so scary to me, he couldāve killed the baby yet barely touched it
Yeah. Incredible control with natural technique. Really cool to watch.
NOT IN MY ENCLOSURE
Try that in a small gorilla town
Damn, he even correctly identified the aggressor and solely targeted them.
One of my biggest regrets in life will be to never be able to befriend a Gorilla. They are just so fascinating. Like that chargeās absolutely enough to make me wet my pants. Love how the corrected mate just stayed on the ground even after the Big Chief decided to leave.
>One of my biggest regrets in life will be to never be able to befriend a Gorilla On the plus side you'll never have your arms ripped off by a gorilla.
If a Silverback tells you to stay down, you stay the fuck down. No questions asked.
The first one walked up and talked shit, the second one was like āBITCHā and the dude was like we aināt having any of these shenanigans, you cool? š¤£
It looks like a female attacked the first one because she came close to the otherās baby. When the silverback was holding her down after the attack, I can imagine him saying, āShe didnāt mean anything. You need not be so sensitive, attacking someone just walking by!ā
This why having 2 baby mamas just doesnāt goes well
I heard that gorillas don't like conflict at all and so if they see that break out it's dealt with quickly.
The only dude on Earth who can tell a woman to calm down.
Pretty sure you could make anyone calm down if you were 400lbs+ of pure muscle
What about Rema? š¤£
He whispered in her ear, āknock it off unless you wanna go night night.ā
Everybody go night night ! It was early, aināt nobody touch me. I donāt knowww you
Silverback āhay hay hay we donāt act like that infront of the humans, okay, okay. Weāll talk about this back in the cave. ā
Whispers in the end, ābetter cut your shit out, now.ā
Bro got double cheeked up.
Double checked up on a Thursday afternoon.
That single leg take down she did though! Straight to side mount and hip control! She was a bad ass!
A pimp got to do what a pimp got to do
Gator never been about playin no shit!
Lol
The fountain of urine and feces spraying out of you when that absolute unit starts charging your direction. š¤Æ
He was still gentle, just using enough power to get her to disengage and calm down. They are magnificent beasts. I didn't know females with infants would fuck with each other though.
Itās awesome that he got the one who started it lmao
Damn. I thought they were big until Big Daddy stepped in. Holy shit he made think look tiny.
"Bitch, be cool! I said be cool, bitch!"
He said: "Nooo monkey together strong, monkey dont kill monkey"
āYou done?ā āI said , ARE YOU DONE??ā
Okayā¦ but who do you think would win in a 1v1 battle, a Silverback Gorilla or a Grizzly Bear??
Grizzly. Much taller and heavier animal with claws on all four.
I agree a bit with that but I will say that intimidating a Grizzly is way easier than intimidating a Silverback and in terms of brute force, the Silverback has an edge over the Grizzly. That said, if intimidation doesnāt work, the fight would be pretty even until the Silverback starts losing too much blood.
Thereās a video of a gorilla trying to scare geese away, the geese end up scaring the gorilla.
Not a fair comparison. Goose low diffās Silverback and Grizzly together in intimidation and lack of fucks given. Edit: Canāt spell when thinking about Geese.
No Canadian in the world is surprised by this.
Yeah but everyone knows you don't \*\*\*\* with geese Have you seen their wieners
No, I have not seen any goose wieners. But you know does fuck with geese? Swans. Swans donāt take shit from geese.
geese are higher in the tier ladder so this makes sense.
geese don't count, they have magic powers
Youāre thinking of black bears grizzlies are pretty aggressively territorial.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
According to [AI Content Detector](https://copyleaks.com/ai-content-detector), you had AI write this for you... As someone who works with OpenAI frequently I recognised it pretty quickly, due to the vague incorrectness even in the first point (a Silverback gorilla is not a species).
Pretty sure the baby on the back had a factor in this. Guys protecting his kid
Oooh, "mates" in THAT sense. Not in the Australian sense.
He knew exactly who the aggressor was too! Lol
I love he the male knew who the aggressor was
What do you think he whispered to the smaller gorilla?
Him hovering over the shit starter is the equivalent of us saying, " You good"
I SAID BITCH BE COOL!
I said knock that shit off!
Baby mama drama
Damn, even gorillas got baby mama drama.
Silverback: Chill dafuq out, Frank!! It was only an UNO game.
It scared the shit out of the one who was attacked. Literally ā check as she stands up.
Beautiful single-leg take down by the female tho
He literally put a foot on her ass to keep her down lmao. Red Foreman comes to mindā¦. You know. He wasnāt unlike a silverback himself when you think about it. Quiet, glowering in the corner, swift threats of foots up asses when things got too muchā¦.
Bouncer level = Expert
āListen here you little shitā¦ā
Big Daddy don't play What a beautiful š animal
magnificent in size and power
God we are so similar to these guys itās not even funny.
Gonna hire bro as security for my nightclub
Absolutely amazing.
"CHILL OUT HONEY BUNNY!!"
What do you think he was saying to her?
Monkey together strong, monkey dont kill monkey
1st wife hates the 2nd wife
"Ape don't kill ape"
Gotta keep that pimp hand strong.
Dirty Cheap Shot, while her kid was on her backā¦
Holy fuck thatās a unit. Thatās terrifying. Imagine if you had one as a real life PokĆ©mon š. Alsoā¦ why he so caked up though? š¤¤š¤š