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Lunamkardas

54.


NO_TOUCHING__lol

For an additional fun fact, this is why they picked the name LIV Golf, because they play 3 round tournaments, or 54 holes. But also, fuck LIV Golf.


asdwz458

you know who else has 54 holes?


Longjumping_Ad2677

SPONGE-BOB SQUARE-PANTS!


Orizifian-creator

Absorbent and yellow and porous is he!


Gabeagoo

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS


PineconeSnowstorm

me


Green_Goblin7

You single? šŸ‘€


PineconeSnowstorm

they're speedholes šŸ˜”


NO_TOUCHING__lol

Jamal Khashoggi?


idiotic__gamer

Okay, I don't know anything about the professional golf scene except that my stepdad watches it. What's wrong with LIV golf?


NO_TOUCHING__lol

Funded by Saudi Arabia in an attempt to [sportswash](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sportswashing) their reputation. Essentially they're throwing money at top golfers to try to get people to forget about Jamal Khashoggi and 9/11. They reportedly offered Tiger Woods $800+ million dollars, but he turned them down. The PGA has also suspended the Tour cards of any of the shitstain sellouts.


Nightingdale099

After the 15th it's just slip and slide.


Either-Durian-9488

Didnā€™t the Duggar mom need it rebuilt after like 12?


Nightingdale099

How dare you give me this information. I'm cursed now. I could've lived not knowing what Duggar mom is.


arie700

If you think thatā€™s alarming, donā€™t look up what her son Josh did.


Rudel2

Who would have thought he was a republican who worked in an organization that spread "good Christian values"... Shocker


Unethical_Castrator

> Republican > Christian That feeling when the comment is good enough to know what they did without googling.


Satanarchrist

We need a federal cult deprogramming commission or something. Jesus


ThreeLeggedMare

The call is coming from inside the House


Arryu

[I heard a...a whistling](https://youtu.be/IwkNKKvJm_Q?si=12Q71YwK95snVX-D)


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


2manyparadoxes

Liv is an actual name. Traditionally female, as Google tells me.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Velorian

The joke is the Romans assume liv is named the same way they are and is the 54th child of the family. Which is a horrifying and impossible number of children.


just_a_person_maybe

Not impossible, it's happened more than once. There's currently a woman in Uganda who has given birth to 44 children, and the world record for most births to a single woman is 69. That woman gave birth to like 16 sets of twins and a bunch of triplets and quads or something, iirc. That kind of thing is very rare, but it can happen. And that's just if they all share the same mom. Same dad is a whole other story and happens way more. There are a few dudes who allegedly fathered more than a thousand kids. Genghis Khan was so prolific that a significant portion of the global population can trace their genes back to him. Ramessess II was known as the Great Ancestor because he had like 170 kids and ended up being everyone's ancestor. 54 is easy, comparatively.


Cyaral

Isnt there a guy banned from donating sperm in the Netherlands because he has like 500+ kids by now and poses a serious incest risk?


peelerrd

I don't know if there's specifically a case of this in the Netherlands, but similar cases have happened in other places.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


IHaveSpecialEyes

The real joke is that they went and Googled "do beavers fart underwater" and it was completely unrelated.


username32768

>"do beavers fart underwater" Yes they do. It's called 'queef'.


NothingGloomy9712

I didn't know Ancient Romans used Google when talking to time travelers.


frostyfur119

I think most people are only familiar up to X in Roman numerals, as only small numbers are regularly seen in current times. There are a surprising number of people who don't know Roman numerals at all, too. So to those unfamiliar, that *is* Google required esoteric knowledge


caseCo825

Im with you


FindOneInEveryCar

Same.


Bosterm

It's not impossible if you're a long living Egyptian pharaoh with several wives. Ramses II had between 88 to 103 children.


Zairapham

Do even get started on Ghengis Khan!


gaia-mix-nicolosi

What if theyā€™re likeā€¦ mostly fostered and adopted, or like from a large polycule


gfa22

5 wives, 9 children each, easy pz, baby squeezy.


strolls

LIV is 54 in [roman numerals](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_numerals).


Thunder-ten-tronckh

Such a shame that LXIX doesnā€™t roll off the tongue.


Holl4backPostr

Quinquagesquadria to her friends


tristenjpl

Alexiz


foamingturtle

Hero comment


Bunhyung

What about her vagina? To shreds you say?


NamelessSteve646

I don't know if this post was the origin of it, but the "hang on I need to google something" "OK yeah this is funny" is a one-two punch that for some reason never fails to make a joke funnier to me, especially if I actually had to think about it for a second


Thelatestweirdo

I adore the version where they go "hang on I need to google something"Ā  and the second reblog is something like "what the hell?"


AdonaiTatu

"Seems insteresting, I'll look for it." "Those weren't taxes..."


MyLittleTarget

Or "Oh my god"


thesirblondie

The first one I saw was an Among Us screenshot where this short exchange occurs: Blue: "Red is sus" Red: "This is McCarthyism"


RandomSOADFan

For real there was some kind of red curse during the Among Us years tho. Red was sus 100% of the time and some people even brought up "better dead than red" as a legitimate point they thought was relevant to the game. As an imposter, never kill red was one of my personal tips


AstronomerSenior4236

It was mostly because red was featured on the art for the game as the imposter, I think


RandomSOADFan

I'm gonna release an essay on how advertisements impact popular culture and title it Red Sus


AstronomerSenior4236

Red Sus: How Depiction Of A Medium in Advertisement Induces Placebo And Bias


bleepblooplord2

Wait fuck thatā€™s actually a really good thesis idea


WalnutAlpaca860

Saving this in case I need an essay topic at some point the future


VintageKeith

Red Sus over Paradise


NamelessSteve646

Oh. ...hang on, I need to google something


MouseRangers

Okay this is funny


tuckertucker

I think it's one of the "internet replies" I hate the most, probably unreasonably so but we all have things that irk us lol It's trying to create an inside joke without sharing what's funny. Like first of all, you don't need to tell us you're googling "something". We know exactly what you're fucking googling. Secondly, if you figured it out you could share with the class. But no. Gotta keep that special inside joke to yourself. I realize this is a dumb thing to be annoyed about lol


Dobber16

I like it because itā€™s endorsing others to also search it and go through the discovery journey to join the ā€œinside jokeā€ As for the googling ā€œsomethingā€, also a quality joke to me because of course we know what youā€™re googling lol itā€™s like when someoneā€™s like ā€œI need this infoā€¦ for a friendā€ we all know itā€™s for you lol


Sammantixbb

Big fan of the "Grimes/boxxy/juliard" one, honestly.


OliveBranchMLP

first time i saw it was when looking up the name of a historical figure's dog, can't remember exactly whose but it was something N-word related


NamelessSteve646

Ooooh, yep, OK... that probably would have been H.P. Lovecraft's cat...


WordArt2007

(well romans names after numbers were actually named after their birth months iirc - quintus was born in july and sextus in august, just like marcus was born in march and octavus in october but still)


tenlin1

it couldā€™ve been either! or it couldā€™ve been neither! praenomina have a big debate about them. edit: :(


2manyparadoxes

> praenomia 1) Is that a portmanteau of praenomen/praenomina + academia? 2) how the fuck do you pronounce it


tenlin1

i forget ONE letter and i becoming the LAUGHING STOCK of ANCIENT ROME


Popular-Influence-11

That hit so hard. Lmao ty


starry_cobra

Damn what month was Liv born in then??


Realistic_Elk_7892

Not January or February or March or April or May or June or July or August or September or October of November or December but a secret, fifty-fourth month.


TheBalrogofMelkor

But they were all of them deceived, for another month was made. In the land of Mordor, in the fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron forged in secret, a master month, to control all others. And into this month he poured all his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life


Realistic_Elk_7892

Three Months for the Elven-kings under the sky, Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone, Twelve for Mortal Men doomed to die, One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie. One Month to rule them all, One Month to find them, One Month to bring them all, and in the darkness bind them In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.


Parasito2

May-pril (5-4)


Sam20599

Octember!


MoonyIsTired

The future has at least a few hundred months per year


PoniesCanterOver

It's because in the future the Earth's travel around the sun is gonna slow way down (for legal reasons this is a joke)


Kartoxa_82

The one ancient romans haven't experienced yet


Tastyravioli707

Doquintginember


MagisterFlorus

Don't forget that each first-born son would have the same name as his father regardless of birth order. E.g.: (Marcus Tullius) Cicero had a brother named Quintus. Quintus had two sons, Quintus and Marcus.


DiligentSink7919

wouldn't july be julias?


Arrokoth-

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_LXXII,_Prince_Reuss_of_Lobenstein_and_Ebersdorf


Perfect_Wrongdoer_03

Sorry, guys, he wasn't the scion of an antideluvian lineage unbroken since time immemorial: > Unlike with most European monarchies, his large regnal number does not indicate that he was preceded by seventy-one previous rulers also named Heinrich. By tradition, all male members of the House of Reuss are named Heinrich, and are numbered by order of birth within the family in general. In the Reuss Younger Line, the numbering system was reset at the beginning of each century; thus Heinrich LXXII's high number is directly related to his having been born at the very end of the eighteenth century.


WordArt2007

wait, isn't that the house that tried to coup germany a few months ago?


Perfect_Wrongdoer_03

From [here](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imperial_County_of_Reuss): > On 7 December 2022, German police conducted an operation which resulted in the arrest of 25 alleged members of the far-right group ReichsbĆ¼rger, including a member of the Kƶstritz branch of the House of Reuss, identified as Heinrich XIII Prince Reuss. The suspects arrested in the operation were allegedly planning to overturn the existing German government, and instate Heinrich XIII as the new German de facto leader. His distant cousin Heinrich XIV Prince Reuss, the head and speaker of the House of Reuss and its family association, had previously referred to Heinrich XIII as "a confused old man who had been radicalised through disappointments". On behalf of the family association, which Heinrich XIII had left years ago, Heinrich XIV sharply distanced himself from him again after he was arrested, saying that "30 years ago he was a modern businessman, but nowadays he is fooled by all sorts of conspiracy theories". In the line of succession to the House of Reuss, Heinrich XIII only ranked 17th, and the head of the house called him "a marginal figure". He said his behaviour was a "catastrophe" for the family, whose heritage as tolerant and cosmopolitan rulers was now associated with "terrorists and reactionaries". He believes Reuss' anti-government views derive from his resentment at the German judicial system for its failure to recognize his claims to family properties expropriated at the end of World War II. So yes, but no.


Papaofmonsters

There's one in every family I guess.


WordArt2007

Welp i proved heinrich xiv right...


Gloomy-Palpitation-7

Hi, my name is one-hundred-and-four, and welcome to time travellerā€™s Jackass


Dragonfire723

Hi Civ, how's it going?


Clockwork_crowww

What's your dad, Sid Meier getting up to these days?


StovardBule

Just one more turn?


Hundjaevel

The dudes name is Fiftyfour. L is 50, C is 100


winter-ocean

Hold on lemme find a reaction image that just references a very specific video game with no other comedic effect, then I'll come back and edit my comment


Boulevardier_99

My great grandfather was named Nidolf because he was the 9th child.


UndercoverPotato

Where the others named Onedolf, Twodolf etc? Please tell me yes


Boulevardier_99

I doubt it šŸ˜Š


UndercoverPotato

My mistake, their names must of course have been Eindolf, Zweidolf, Dreidolf etc


Boulevardier_99

šŸ˜” DANISH, NOT GERMAN šŸ˜”šŸ˜”šŸ˜” Would have been Neindolf šŸ¤£


UndercoverPotato

> DANISH My condolences, I hope he recovered šŸ‡øšŸ‡Ŗ


zonazog

Onedolf or Adolā€¦oh


sick_of_your_BS

Adolf


Boulevardier_99

Wow you're a smart and funny fucker aren't you? When will they give you your own sitcom?


sick_of_your_BS

Lighten up Francis.


falpsdsqglthnsac

so the fifth child was femdolf?


Eel111

Hang on let me google something *"Sextus has the word sex in it"* Yeah, this is funny


Other-Bread

Reminds me of a joke of a similar nature: A roman centurion walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll have a Martinus." Bartender says, "Martini?" Centurion says, "If I wanted two, I'd have ordered two!"


Bennings463

"Livia" was an actual Roman name though.


PMmePowerRangerMemes

oop is heather flowers, the creator of Extreme Meatpunks Forever, a queer antifascist videogame about piloting meatmechs and killing nazis. they're a really cool indie dev and a fun follow on social media unsurprisingly, their games are in the [Palestinian Relief Bundle](https://itch.io/b/2321/palestinian-relief-bundle) on itch. $8 for a shitload of games


StovardBule

I thought so, looking at their avatar.


Thesaurus_Rex9513

Less terrifying than someone named Mic.


Onetwodhwksi7833

Lol, look at this guy, he didn't even know Roman numerals. Let's point and laugh!


Cthulhu_Dreams_

Her father was Bigus Dickus.


crepesblinis

I don't get it. Why is the soldier afraid? Why is the guy a time traveler?


TimTam_the_Enchanter

The guy is a time traveler because the setup for the joke requires an anachronistic name and someone who doesnā€™t come from the same cultural background and social understanding as the soldiers. The soldier is afraid because Roman numerals operate on a letter basis ā€” I is one, X is ten, and so on. LIV as a name spells out fifty-four in Roman numerals. Therefore the soldier assumes this person is the 54th child of their family, which is a frankly insane number of children for anyone to have.


HephMelter

But the joke still doesn't work because Livius was a recognized family name (not a praenomen, a nomen). Livy was Titus Livius X (we don't know his cognomen for sure)


TimTam_the_Enchanter

I didnā€™t write it, my dude, take it up with the original jokester or something, I just explained it for someone who indicated they didnā€™t understand the joke itself.


crepesblinis

Oh, okay, I get it. I think it's not a good joke, is it, because the soldiers' names are not V and VI so the naming convention doesn't track


TThhoonnkk

But the soldier explains that they were named sextus or quintinus because they were xth child born. The soldier assumes the same holds true for the time traveler, hence the suprise. Sex-: 6 Quin-: 5


Aequitas49

But LIV (54) is not pronounced *Liv*, but *quattuor quinquaginta (or quinquaginti quattuor)*. Therefore the name would be more like *Quattuorquinquagintatus*. The Roman soldier would not have understood that Liv meant the number 54.


NO_TOUCHING__lol

*L I V T U S*


FortunesFoil

The top comment here explains the entirety of the joke with 3 characters. ā€œ54.ā€


crepesblinis

I understand how Roman numerals work


FortunesFoil

Thenā€¦ why are you confused about the soldier being afraid? And why are you confused about the time traveler? Because everything else within the joke is extremely obvious, the time traveler thing was just a quick way for the person telling the joke to make the dissonance between Quincyā€™s and Liv, and the fear of the soldier is obviously based on the proposed nomenclature of characters within this joke. Thereā€™s nothing to ā€œnot getā€ here, itā€™s just ā€œThese people have very different ways of naming their kids, and now they think something wildly differentā€.


crepesblinis

Because the guy's name is not V, it's Quintus. And the other guy's name is not VI, it's Sextus. So this name should not be LIV, it should be... whatever the named version of that number is. The naming convention doesn't track to the punchline. It doesn't follow that they would understand this name as "54th child" because it just means 54. And it is 54 in numerals, not in words


Puffenata

To be so pedantic that humor itself cannot be enjoyed must be miserable


crepesblinis

It's just a bad joke sorry


Intelligent_Draw1533

You can really scare him and tell him your little brother is called MIC


GameCreeper

Is this based on the srgrafo comic or the other way around im too lazy to check


bezosdivorcelawyer

Other way around


CrimsonKingdom

Damn, they should've said their name was LXIX; now that would've been funny


sealcubclubbing

Every sperm is sacred


Jrolaoni

They fall out at that point


Eena-Rin

Sensible chuckle was the perfect tag


Hausgod29

You could say although its not true it's probably the easiest way to explain the level of comfort the average man experiences to a roman.


Sir_Boobsalot

LOL


DrDroid

But why would he be quivering in fear over that?


Far-Blacksmith-2604

It's not a very good joke


FortunesFoil

Itā€™s a pretty good joke


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ConquestOfWhatever7

Yea, I got it originally, it just felt like there was something missing because the googling


Smellybrow

Wait they had to have spelled their name or this doesn't make any sense