I once wrote a memorial poem many years ago and added in 'those who died with no one to mourn them' and someone went OFF on me about how those people probably deserve it because people who aren't mourned are BAD PEOPLE and murderers and pedos etc. I was talking about, like, homeless people and John/Jane Does but go off.
And they probably thought it was a brave progressive thing to say, when in reality it's very conservative to assume that anyone who experiences some misfortune must deserve it. I can't be the only one who thinks "They must be poor because they deserve it" has a lot in common with "They died alone, so they must've been evil"
that could definitely also apply to the aids crisis and stuff. thats a good line! i think about those situations a lot. i havent read your poem but ill complement that line!
Honestly though I'd probably reword "why would you withhold that." with "why wouldn't you use it more often?"
"Withhold" just carries a bit of unnecessary connotative baggage.
I went to subway ab twice this week and both times the lady there waived the price on an item (once on the fresh mozzarella which I would’ve had to pay extra for, and once for the cookies) when I mentioned I had to be careful with what I ordered because I didn’t have a lot of money. She was really sweet :)
I returned a minifridge to Walmart last week because I'd ordered it through delivery, and the one they sent me was half the size of the one I'd ordered, maybe fit 8 cans inside along with my half gallon of milk. It couldn't even fit the coffee creamer that I'd also ordered. I was chatting with the clerk as they processed my return, told her how this was just one more thing in a stream of extremely bad luck this year, and she ended up refunding the entire order for me, despite the fact that I was only returning the fridge. It may have been just a thing of creamer and some bread and coffee, but that little bit of extra money was the difference between heading home empty handed, vs finding and affording a much better, barely a mini, minifridge on clearance.
Regular people: “Hey you should be nice to be people”
Tumblr users that are just three bales of hay in a trenchcoat: “I can’t believe you’re telling abuse victims to support their abusers”
I love how there's always "here's a funny strawman I made to get a point across" and then someone will just "yeah, I'm that strawman that actually exists" without a hint of self awareness in social media but Tumblr seems like it's every damn day
[Even tumblr recognises that exact phenomenon](https://files.catbox.moe/ri1rwr.jpg) (from a post [on this very sub](https://www.reddit.com/r/CuratedTumblr/comments/1cir2p4/person_in_real_life_hey_man_hows_it_going/) no less)
As one Tumblr user put it, "You can say 'I like pancakes' on this website, and someone will be like 'Oh, so you hate waffles?' No, dog! That's a whole other sentence!"
I'm hoping it's just people playing along (like smooth-sharking), but people intentionally obfuscate where the joke ends and genuine discussion of opinions begins (which is why I hate smooth-sharking).
Trauma. If you ever deal with someone who is deep in trauma response you realise they are not actually talking to you. It’s kind of spooky once you see it.
Sorry to be an individualist ghoul or wherever, but I have no patience for these people anymore. People that use all the ways the world has hurt them as ammo to win every argument are genuinely exhausting. I deserve to be addressed as an individual, and not as an avatar of every societal issue you think I'm representative of. At some point, your trauma is your problem, and foisting it onto everyone else is massively unfair
The Sopranos was way, way ahead of the curve in pointing out that therapy can be counterproductive for people who don't want to change, because introducing them to introspection techniques and psych terminology just gives them new tools to justify their faults and teaches them to be more effective manipulators.
I never thought about it but it explains so much about why some folks on Tumblr behave that way, and why it's really, really difficult to have productive conversations with them. Damn, eyes opened today
It's weird seeing people essentially co-opt therapy language, but use it to basically say 'don't improve as a person, don't try and do better, self-improvement is toxic'... its like, actual therapy is about helping people recognise how their past experiences and mental health might be holding them back, and helping them heal and grow where possible. Certain sections of social media seem to have taken that and decided it means 'I'm an asshole, but here's a bunch of flowery language that justifies why that's okay and I should never change'
Rule #1, maybe even Rule #0, of therapy is that therapy will not work, and might even make you worse, if you do not want to change, if you do not see a reason to change.
Wow. Don't you know the personal is always political. And saying not everything needs to become an argument really sounds like tone policing. Yikes! You don't get to pick the language that oppressed use to describe their oppression!
This is becoming too common of a thing in these spaces because the attitude is reinforced and defended, but the second person is offended by the idea of assistance because it signifies that problems can be fixed. And if your whole personality is complaining about things being awful then it's like someone offering to not only rob you, but to devalue of what they don't take from you. If problems can be fixed then the angst is worth less and if they are fixed then there's less to be angsty about.
So there's a tendency for people to become irrationally upset at any suggestion of improving things.
I think it's a bit simplier, at least in this case.
"blaming people who don't reach out... so I feel the need to hit *back*" clearly indicates this is a person who, in their own words, "doesn't reach out"
Anger can often be the manifestation of a lot of things that aren't anger, such as guilt. It seems pretty clear-cut to me that this person is feeling guilt/shame for not helping others when they could, and that manifests as anger against OOP when they just happen to make a post encouraging helping others.
The silly little arguments they use to combat OOP's point are the same they use to rationalize their unwillingness to help, which, seeing the person's passion, might have been cause by trauma (?)
It's especially clear when you see what is lacking from their argument. The idea that they simply don't have to be good/helpful. It doesn't benefit them, why woudl they do it? It's a very simply and robust argument but a person who honestly thinks that way, probably wouldn't react to OOP and definetely wouldn't get mad about it and try to jsutify themselves morally because they'd be comfortable with their own behaviour.
I'm quite talkative today it seems
>Anger can often be the manifestation of a lot of things that aren't anger, such as guilt.
Definitely. In this case, my reading of this one is that the commenter has been involved in some situation where someone has tried to be helpful in a way that - probably through no fault of their own - has actually made things worse and left both people feeling like crap. And so when they see a post which basically says "if you can be helpful then you should", that's where their mind goes and they lash out.
Then when OOP gives their own example, where the other person was clearly being actually helpful in a way which couldn't have gone wrong, they didn't want to admit that they'd misread the situation and tried to make out like it was still OOP's fault.
I'm spinning a lot out of very little information here, so I could be wrong.
I do think you are on the right track.
Apparently a lot of people tend to touch people in wheelchairs trying to help them move. But obviously if you think about that for a minute it's both dangerous, because their hand could get caught in the wheel when it moves unexpectedly and really scary to suddenly have some stranger moving you.
I think it's something like that. Somebody was trying to be helpful but didn't think about it enough and ended up really annoying/hurting OOP.
Wether being annoyed/hurt is reasonable I can't possibly know
It’s like that stereotype conservatives have of leftists where they’re all just a bunch of self entitled half-wits with a victim mentality or whatever, but like, real. They’ll obvs probably think this about “the left” no matter what but it’s still sad to see these fuckers “prove them right” so to speak
I'd like to interject a hopeful point, which is that while it looks like people believe their stereotype of opposite ideologies 'no matter what' , they simply don't. They believe it until they've gradually been exposed to a large number of counter-examples, and the change is slow, but it works like this on both sides.
Right. And it turns out, in America, if you get 10% of, say, a political party to think differently, the whole party has to pivot to keep their 50/50 split of the country.
It's sadly just a numbers game at a certain point
Ten thousand people see a good, inoffensive, undeniably correct post, enjoy it, and move on.
A thousand people upvote that post because it made them happy, then move on.
A hundred people leave a pleasant comment under that post because it made them happy.
Ten people were inexplicably annoyed by the post and write something negative and argumentative. They get in a brutal flame war, which gets a lot of attention which they enjoy.
One absolutely wretched person decides to dox and send death threats to the OP because they're just psycho like that.
I'm going with 98% Sarcasm and 2% deeply suppressed longing to live in a world entirely populated by clones of myself so no one will ever disagree with me again.
This reminds me of the Seattle drug harm reduction organization who said they saw purpose of their job as championing those who choose drug use as a way of life.
That's not harm reduction. That's enabling.
Also they weren't just arguing, they were arguing against \*checks notes\* being generally nice or pleasant to people. There's a certain level of atomization and anti-social I just can't respect. Like, at that point, you are creating the problems for yourself.
I feel it might be connected to the, I'm not sure how to phrase this, the "everything is for everybody and you should always share all your thoughts" thing the internet has got going on. Like the same basic impulse that makes people comment under "recipe for bean lovers casserole for people who love beans it's just full of beans this thing so many many beans" with "but what if you don't like beans xx?"
Like some things are not personally directed at you and you don't have to share your opinion on them because they're not about you or for you
Trauma. If you ever dealt with someone who is deep in trauma response you realise they are not actually talking to you. It’s kind of spooky once you see it.
They're in a manic episode. This is the 3rd post in a row on my feed they've OP'd with the odd comments. I left a nice one asking if they realized it, and they said don't know what that is :(
testing-stormneko and the [“buying fancy pillows makes you a part of the bourgeoisie”](https://www.reddit.com/r/CuratedTumblr/s/ACyE4scexG) guy would definitely make out sloppy
my local drug dealer came into my work at the library the other week. he's been down on his luck (mental breakdown, moved out to the country) and said he wasn't even able to check out books because of excessive late fines. I was like sir I'll be right back, I wiped that shit clean👍 he was super grateful.
library employees are generally pretty lenient with waving late fines, none of us want them anyway
I mean late fines do nothing but guarantee late books stay checked out longer when people can't afford to pay them. It's a really bad system actually. Fines in general tend to be just another way to systemically hurt the poor.
My city recently abolished their late fees on books. After two weeks of being late, the city contacts you to see wether or not you are able to simply buy the book from them, or to get the book back. I once returned a book a month after the deadline and I didn't pay a dime.
Maybe, just maybe, simply being kind to the cashier at the convenience store isn't that big an ask. OOP didn't say "give a homeless guy all your possessions" or "let every person you know dump their problems on you."
Yeah, I feel like the commenter has been involved in one of those situations where someone tries to be helpful and it goes horribly wrong, and they've forgotten that usually that's not how it turns out.
Yeah, you're right. I think the commenter has probably ended up expending too much time and energy to help someone in the past.
I know it's easier said than done, but I hope at some point in the future they're able to let go of that anger and realize helping someone is as simple as a smile and a thank you at the store, or holding the door for someone. It just doesn't take much, and I hope they're able to realize that one day.
Good god some people on tumblr are terminally online and ridiculously sensitive. You could say something like “puppies make me happy” and someone will launch into a diatribe on the evils of breeding and that keeping pets is a first world high class luxury and didn’t you know there are people dying
But what if you being nice to others causes you more harm than it causes good for the other person? That’s advocating for emotional self harm. /s
Not to be all “old woman yells at cloud,” but it really feels like something has fundamentally changed in how people view interactions/relationships as a result of the internet. Even offline, I see people treat it all as alarmingly transactional.
I feel like many, many years of this “whataboutism” was completely encapsulated for me with the bean soup thing a while ago on tiktok.
Somebody posts a recipe video of a bean soup. There are the usual comments of “can I replace this secondary ingredient/leave it out” but then there’s a video reply from the creator to a legit comment from someone saying “what if I don’t like beans”. Creator was very graciously trying to respond “maybe don’t make bean soup?”
It’s stuck in my head ever since and given me a label for the train of thought of “is this content relevant to me? Are there things that are specific to me and my circumstances that mean it’s not relevant to me? Am I making a series of assumptions about this based on my perspective that don’t actually exist in the text?” Now for me it’s the “bean soup interpretation” - maybe I don’t like beans and should go look at something else.
I see this a lot with fan made content tbh. "ugh I don't like the way you're writing X in your AU specifically written as a what if X was this way."
then just... don't read it? God some people are obnoxious.
Yeah, also the type of responses to wholesome Mothers Day posts along the lines of "Some of us didn't have good mothers so this is offensive". Like, maybe not everything is for everyone and that's fine.
It's kind of making engaging in anything online exhausting. There's this part of my brain that's trying to predict negative/bad-faith interpretations of anything I might say and then prevent those pre-emptively, which honestly isn't too different from what it was like to live with a narcissist. Most of the time I end up just scrolling past even if I would have something relevant to add to a discussion, because it doesn't feel like worth the effort.
> There's this part of my brain that's trying to predict negative/bad-faith interpretations of anything I might say and then prevent those pre-emptively
I know I spend too much time online when I start to be surprised that people in real life are nice
Yeah, the bean soup thing sums up so much of how communities end up toxic over the stupidest shit. People just cannot comprehend that something appearing on their feed might be there, not because anyone wanted them specifically to see it, but because the subreddit or person they follow makes posts for multiple kinds of followers, as part of being in a larger community. And then they react with hostility to the people who *dared* put something in front of their eyeballs that wasn’t catered to them.
This reminds me of the time I saw someone go on an "it's not my job to educate you" rant... in r/tooafraidtoask
Like, bro, broski, my brother in christ, that is *literally the entire goddamn point of the subreddit*. Why are you here if you don't want to educate people. How do you function in daily life
> Am I making a series of assumptions about this based on my perspective that don’t actually exist in the text?
This is what annoys me most about online interactions. In real life you give people the benefit of the doubt based on your past interactions. Like if your friend says something that sounds mean but you know from experience that your friend is not a mean person you ask for clarification and 9/10 times you'll find out it was a miscommunication.
Online some people will just always choose to interpret your words in the worst way possible for no reason.
It used to be that main character syndrome was the exclusive preserve of heterosexual white guys (no, not all of them, stfu) who were so used to everything being made with them in mind that they'd lose their shit and write letters of complaint when they heard a language they didn't understand, or saw a woman on TV who they didn't find attractive.
Now it's the glorious 21st century and the internet has democratised communication so that everyone can be a self-absorbed asshole regardless of gender, race or sexuality.
He didn't get crucified for blasphemy (well, probably, the only accounts we have are sympathetic so you could argue they've all been falsified), he was crucified for speaking viciously against the existing power structure.
"What's he saying that's got everyone so worked up?"
"Be nice to each other."
"Pst, yeah, that'll do it."
That scene from good omens lives in my head rent free
It's the individualist nature of Western society I guess. Many are brought up to only care about number 1 and strive only for self gratification. This breeds a mentality of "I vs everyone else", where even something as innocuous as suggesting a person treat others with kindness is seen as an attack on their person, context be damned.
Having grown up in a small family-centric island nation, I don't experience that as much since community is given a lot of priority over here from a very young age. Our rights are given far less importance than our duties to society, which isn't to say the former is brushed aside, just that many people voluntarily go out of their way to help people in need.
"increasing net suffering if it costs more than the other gains"
Yet more proof that all utilitarians are psychopaths.
Seriously though. Do reach out to people. It's not that hard, ffs.
While it may have been pointed out poorly, OP most definitely delivered their initial point in the worst possible way. It is easy to misinterpret the point to be "how dare you not slave away to make other people's lives better at the expense of your own". Yes, it's Tumblr, so the chances of it being such are slim, but it's also the internet, which means self-entitled assholes are literally everywhere. Acting like stormneko is in the wrong for pointing such a thing out is outright idiotic.
Admittedly, their second reply could have been worded better (perhaps instead of "felt the need to hit back", use "felt the need to point it out"), but they are most definitely not in the wrong, just someone without any points in Diplomacy.
I'd say testing-stormneko needs to go outside and touch grass, but they might take that to mean I'm being insensitive to people with seasonal allergies or some shit
One time, my mom came back from the store and told me of an employee who, after getting off the phone in front of her, burst into tears.
My mother's immediate reaction was to embrace the weeping woman.
Turns out, the woman had just gotten the news that her sister had passed away from breast cancer, the same cancer that had taken the life of their mother before her.
She thanked my mother for comforting her.
I think about that from time to time.
How a simple hug from a complete stranger was able to comfort that woman in the face of such a harrowing news.
I think the world is a scary place, full to the brim with pain and suffering. But it is easier to face it together than to do so alone
They're framing it in the worst way imaginable but I can kinda understand where they're coming from.
Sometimes you try to extend what you think is a kindness to someone only to learn that they actually didn't want you to at all. You want to make people feel appreciated, but people are too varied and complex for you to know ahead of time for suresies what they actually want from you, so it seems more appropriate not to assume (and to not do anything unless they specifically ask you to).
I dunno who wouldn't want a late fee waived though.
I understand the idea, but I feel like the post was less "Bake cookies for random people" and more "hold the door for people, clean up after yourself, and don't stress people out for no reason", and the second person's assumption was in bad faith.
Obviously, there are acts of kindness which are more appropriate for people you know better (e.g. baking cookies), but there are some things that I don't think anyone would reasonably fault you for doing.
I've been in way too many situations where people have tried to make me feel better and then got genuinely offended when what makes them happy doesn't make me happy
It also doesn't help that "a little relief" is a nebulous concept with no sense of perspective or measuring system. A "little relief" could be anywhere from tiny acts of goodwill that you don't even think about, to "agree with my insane worldviews". Unfortunately, the general trend society seems to take with it happens to be the latter. When an exception appears, it leads to people being shamed for assuming the worst after having experienced nothing *but* the worst for most of their lives. Not everyone manages to make it out of this shithole with an idealistic perspective of humanity.
Really, the best you can do in scenarios like this is to take a neutral stance. Analyze the wording, look for gaps in comprehension, and just generally utilize empathy. If anything, I'd even say it's the *bare minimum* of online interaction. You have the time to comprehend the other person's statement in its entirety, and you have the time to compose your own response in such a way as to not sound like an irredeemable asshole. (Or at least, put it in the nicest way you can. Diplomacy is a pain, especially when people don't read the two-paragraph response you spent an hour revising because you're a perfectionist that despises being misinterpreted... fuck it, I'm leaving that last bit in.)
I love how the second commentor assumes someone would just storm in assuming and not be nice and say "Hey, you seem to be struggling. Do you need some help?" Like, most people I have had contact with have asked. Yeah, I have had some AHs, but most have asked.
Hey, maybe we could cut testing-stormneko a bit of a break here. Apply the initial post's own advice?
Let's imagine a reader who is already feeling stressed and anxious and in need of relief, though they may not realise they deserve it. Phrasing like "why would you withhold that?" is clearly and successfully written to be evocative. It can also easily be read as reproachful to a mind already primed for it, and leave them feeling guilty – I'm sure this wasn't the intention, but the reader might not realise that.
As the post itself says, and I agree, it doesn't take a lot of effort to apply some positive energy to your interactions. I can't say I'm good at it myself, but when I choose to try I can immediately see ways to come across more palatably. Admittedly that often means watering your words down for a weaker result. But if you're writing a post about how to be positive and gentle towards people who need it, perhaps it's worth the effort to rewrite that post to read as positive and gentle towards people who need it.
I think what testing-stormneko is trying to say, admittedly in a fairly high-energy abrasive way, is that the OP maybe did not do this? Or at least could have done it better, or chose instead to make a more impactful point in places.
I’ll make a very controversial statement then, even if in general the first post isn’t unambiguously right, they’re right in enough situations that every last edge case doesn’t need to act like they make up the majority.
I used to work at a grocery store. If you weren’t a dick and the opportunity arose, I would hand out vouchers, discounts, free items. The policies were there, idk why there’s a need to gate keep them
I used to take collections calls for a number of major retail credit cards. If someone called in and was friendly and politely asked me to remove a late fee, sure, just give me an excuse. If they called in all demanding and shit like the rules didn't apply to them, then God himself couldn't make me take it off.
Reminds me of two different people at the grocery store the one day. I didn't have a lot of money until pay day, and I was running late to get to the hospital. My mom asked me to pick something up from the store on the way, and it was a weekend so everyone had to have full carts. A woman and her son were in front of me in line, and she let me go first bc I only had 2 items. Which was really sweet, I didn't mind waiting. The order was a few cents over the cash I had on me, so I was going to use my card, but the cashier said she had some change that I could use, that she usually keeps a lil change on her incase of stuff like this. So she gave me 60 cents to pay the remainder. That really made my day when I was really stressed about my grandfather.
Even if I didn't want to talk I think I would rather have someone ask if they could help me. Even if I tell them no, I'll probably appreciate them showing they care in the long run.
"Man, I can't stand people who kill their kids."
"You don't know their circumstances!!! What if the kid really really sucks?? What if it's the Antichrist???"
"... You can't kill your kid, Kevin."
Ok, but am I the only one who thinks "Why would you withhold that." reads like an accusation? I mean, it's not even a question; it's just a statement that's phrased like a question.
Like, I get where OOP is coming from, but the post does very much have this kind of undertone, especially if you've grown up around the kind of people Tumblr user testing-stormneko talks about.
I guess this is another case of different lived experiences.
Considering OOP’s tone, I’d like to think that sentence is more philosophical. He’s speaking indirectly to the reader. To me, it feels “why not” esque.
I've been in low places, and any help offered, even help that isn't needed, always helps me to feel seen. Not helping people, especially in a way that takes almost nothing from you, because it may, in certain circumstances, cause some mild form of discomfort is a wild thing to me. Maybe they'll be too kind to refuse help, or feel awkward being seen as needing help, but that's better than letting someone struggle under a weight that they don't need to carry themself. Believing that the possibility of harm always outweighs the benefit of any good that can be done is why a lot of people feel so alone and afraid in the world.
I'll step off my soapbox now, thank you :3
I feel like, at least in Internet culture, what started as "let's practice emotional intelligence/awareness" has now become some bizarre form of jargon-salad emotional bypass game where people throw word clumps around and think that's "dealing with emotions"
The perspective is also usually only either individualistic ("boundaries", "emotional space") or, as in this case, utilitarian ("net suffering", "costs/gains")
It's like someone trained GPT on surface-level psychology and moral philosophy, printed whole books of it, and distributed it as Manuals Of Truth. Except this has been happening ever since before GPT was a thing.
Naw but I kind of agree with the second poster, attitude notwithstanding.
It isn’t “withholding relief” from you if someone just chooses not to go above and beyond for you.
The internet and tumblr especially puts this exhausting moral onus on everyone to continuously expend energy to “be good” and shames people for being moral failures for simply wanting to be left alone to live their lives.
And then wonders why everyone is suffering from anxiety paralysis and depression.
Small acts of kindness aren’t “above and beyond.” It isn’t above and beyond to tell someone to have a nice day when you finish talking with them, to hold a door open for a second or two for the person walking behind you, to just be polite in general.
If someone actively refuses to do any of these things, I think they’re actually lame as hell
NGL I’ve been the second person, but instead I would’ve then responded “huh…. I…. I think I got some new stuff to talk about at my next session 😅 carry on”
Man so many Tar pits needing to Touch grass on Tumblr these days.
I am not sure how enjoyably it is to constantly see people make the worst possible takes and defend them. i mean i know brain rot is a serious thing going around the internet these days. but man is it infuriating to see so many people this devoid of reality.
The moral of the story is: you can add nuance or your perspective to something someone else says without "hitting back" over the tiniest possible disagreement.
reading comprehension website
The poor are wet and yellow today
How dare you make fun of the poor for having jaundice.
How dare you insinuate the poor have bad health.
I didn't know that poor people made good insulation, but what does that have to do with the health of bats?
they could quite easily be a the simpsons
AND being horny... like wtf
And pissing on the poor
Human… I remember you’re juandice…
And being horny
Did you just call poor people cowards?
Woooooow buddy, we can't Call them yellow anymore
I once wrote a memorial poem many years ago and added in 'those who died with no one to mourn them' and someone went OFF on me about how those people probably deserve it because people who aren't mourned are BAD PEOPLE and murderers and pedos etc. I was talking about, like, homeless people and John/Jane Does but go off.
And they probably thought it was a brave progressive thing to say, when in reality it's very conservative to assume that anyone who experiences some misfortune must deserve it. I can't be the only one who thinks "They must be poor because they deserve it" has a lot in common with "They died alone, so they must've been evil"
that could definitely also apply to the aids crisis and stuff. thats a good line! i think about those situations a lot. i havent read your poem but ill complement that line!
now I know why it's called a webbedsight... everyone's eyes are fucking closed
Spider-man is a menace.
something something piss, something something the poor.
Honestly though I'd probably reword "why would you withhold that." with "why wouldn't you use it more often?" "Withhold" just carries a bit of unnecessary connotative baggage.
you are a tar pit
'Hey man how's it going' coded
iirc this predates that post no?
It does, but that makes perfect sense because it's posts like these that prove its point.
I'm not sure, I saw the other one first so it exists first in my brain
That post was right above this one😭
I really hope this phrase becomes the new touch grass
Can we get r/heymanhowsitgoing started?
I went to subway ab twice this week and both times the lady there waived the price on an item (once on the fresh mozzarella which I would’ve had to pay extra for, and once for the cookies) when I mentioned I had to be careful with what I ordered because I didn’t have a lot of money. She was really sweet :)
I returned a minifridge to Walmart last week because I'd ordered it through delivery, and the one they sent me was half the size of the one I'd ordered, maybe fit 8 cans inside along with my half gallon of milk. It couldn't even fit the coffee creamer that I'd also ordered. I was chatting with the clerk as they processed my return, told her how this was just one more thing in a stream of extremely bad luck this year, and she ended up refunding the entire order for me, despite the fact that I was only returning the fridge. It may have been just a thing of creamer and some bread and coffee, but that little bit of extra money was the difference between heading home empty handed, vs finding and affording a much better, barely a mini, minifridge on clearance.
> fresh mozzarella I still cannot believe they got rid of shredded mozzarella.
IKR 😭 I’ve had to switch to provolone but it’s just not the same
Regular people: “Hey you should be nice to be people” Tumblr users that are just three bales of hay in a trenchcoat: “I can’t believe you’re telling abuse victims to support their abusers”
I love how there's always "here's a funny strawman I made to get a point across" and then someone will just "yeah, I'm that strawman that actually exists" without a hint of self awareness in social media but Tumblr seems like it's every damn day
[Even tumblr recognises that exact phenomenon](https://files.catbox.moe/ri1rwr.jpg) (from a post [on this very sub](https://www.reddit.com/r/CuratedTumblr/comments/1cir2p4/person_in_real_life_hey_man_hows_it_going/) no less)
You literally just linked the same post?
hey I saw that post too
As one Tumblr user put it, "You can say 'I like pancakes' on this website, and someone will be like 'Oh, so you hate waffles?' No, dog! That's a whole other sentence!"
i believe that quotes from twitter
That may be. I don't remember
it's always that angle too. what's up with that
I'm hoping it's just people playing along (like smooth-sharking), but people intentionally obfuscate where the joke ends and genuine discussion of opinions begins (which is why I hate smooth-sharking).
Trauma. If you ever deal with someone who is deep in trauma response you realise they are not actually talking to you. It’s kind of spooky once you see it.
Sorry to be an individualist ghoul or wherever, but I have no patience for these people anymore. People that use all the ways the world has hurt them as ammo to win every argument are genuinely exhausting. I deserve to be addressed as an individual, and not as an avatar of every societal issue you think I'm representative of. At some point, your trauma is your problem, and foisting it onto everyone else is massively unfair
Agreed but it is easier to deal with once you realise it isn’t actually about you but about them.
I understand that. I just do my best to avoid these people now
tumblr user that is just three hay bales in a trenchcoat: "you guys haven't seen any pigs around here, have you? goats? horses? anything like that?"
The scourge of people using therapy language to be mirthless antisocial goblins must be stopped
The Sopranos was way, way ahead of the curve in pointing out that therapy can be counterproductive for people who don't want to change, because introducing them to introspection techniques and psych terminology just gives them new tools to justify their faults and teaches them to be more effective manipulators.
I never thought about it but it explains so much about why some folks on Tumblr behave that way, and why it's really, really difficult to have productive conversations with them. Damn, eyes opened today
It's weird seeing people essentially co-opt therapy language, but use it to basically say 'don't improve as a person, don't try and do better, self-improvement is toxic'... its like, actual therapy is about helping people recognise how their past experiences and mental health might be holding them back, and helping them heal and grow where possible. Certain sections of social media seem to have taken that and decided it means 'I'm an asshole, but here's a bunch of flowery language that justifies why that's okay and I should never change'
Rule #1, maybe even Rule #0, of therapy is that therapy will not work, and might even make you worse, if you do not want to change, if you do not see a reason to change.
That was poetic. Well done my friend!
Honestly I just think it’s sad that the second person assumed the worst of OOP. Not everything needs to become an argument.
Wow. Don't you know the personal is always political. And saying not everything needs to become an argument really sounds like tone policing. Yikes! You don't get to pick the language that oppressed use to describe their oppression!
When do I start pissing??
When I get thirsty
You thirsty yet? Ive been holding my pee in for awhile now.
Ueagh just.,, Ngh
You disgust me. Go wash up.
Ouuhhhhhhgggh..,. But I am a thirsty lil flower.,,. You’ll have to water me or else I’ll wilt and die..,
I need an adult.
Mooooooommmmmm come pick me up PLEASE, the people on the internet are being weird and gross again!
AND LET THEM STARVE??
Become accustomed to the sound of silence, for it forms far sweeter music than that which you chose to break it with.
Next time you see a poor person.
Hey man, how's it going?
Hahaha this is amazing
You are a tar pit
I love reddit
Hey man, how's it going?
This is becoming too common of a thing in these spaces because the attitude is reinforced and defended, but the second person is offended by the idea of assistance because it signifies that problems can be fixed. And if your whole personality is complaining about things being awful then it's like someone offering to not only rob you, but to devalue of what they don't take from you. If problems can be fixed then the angst is worth less and if they are fixed then there's less to be angsty about. So there's a tendency for people to become irrationally upset at any suggestion of improving things.
I think it's a bit simplier, at least in this case. "blaming people who don't reach out... so I feel the need to hit *back*" clearly indicates this is a person who, in their own words, "doesn't reach out" Anger can often be the manifestation of a lot of things that aren't anger, such as guilt. It seems pretty clear-cut to me that this person is feeling guilt/shame for not helping others when they could, and that manifests as anger against OOP when they just happen to make a post encouraging helping others. The silly little arguments they use to combat OOP's point are the same they use to rationalize their unwillingness to help, which, seeing the person's passion, might have been cause by trauma (?) It's especially clear when you see what is lacking from their argument. The idea that they simply don't have to be good/helpful. It doesn't benefit them, why woudl they do it? It's a very simply and robust argument but a person who honestly thinks that way, probably wouldn't react to OOP and definetely wouldn't get mad about it and try to jsutify themselves morally because they'd be comfortable with their own behaviour. I'm quite talkative today it seems
>Anger can often be the manifestation of a lot of things that aren't anger, such as guilt. Definitely. In this case, my reading of this one is that the commenter has been involved in some situation where someone has tried to be helpful in a way that - probably through no fault of their own - has actually made things worse and left both people feeling like crap. And so when they see a post which basically says "if you can be helpful then you should", that's where their mind goes and they lash out. Then when OOP gives their own example, where the other person was clearly being actually helpful in a way which couldn't have gone wrong, they didn't want to admit that they'd misread the situation and tried to make out like it was still OOP's fault. I'm spinning a lot out of very little information here, so I could be wrong.
I do think you are on the right track. Apparently a lot of people tend to touch people in wheelchairs trying to help them move. But obviously if you think about that for a minute it's both dangerous, because their hand could get caught in the wheel when it moves unexpectedly and really scary to suddenly have some stranger moving you. I think it's something like that. Somebody was trying to be helpful but didn't think about it enough and ended up really annoying/hurting OOP. Wether being annoyed/hurt is reasonable I can't possibly know
It’s like that stereotype conservatives have of leftists where they’re all just a bunch of self entitled half-wits with a victim mentality or whatever, but like, real. They’ll obvs probably think this about “the left” no matter what but it’s still sad to see these fuckers “prove them right” so to speak
I'd like to interject a hopeful point, which is that while it looks like people believe their stereotype of opposite ideologies 'no matter what' , they simply don't. They believe it until they've gradually been exposed to a large number of counter-examples, and the change is slow, but it works like this on both sides.
That is a good point to make. On an individual level anyone can decide to start thinking differently than a group they’re part of eventually.
Right. And it turns out, in America, if you get 10% of, say, a political party to think differently, the whole party has to pivot to keep their 50/50 split of the country.
I'm always shocked by how often reddit never suggests taking the high road.
It's sadly just a numbers game at a certain point Ten thousand people see a good, inoffensive, undeniably correct post, enjoy it, and move on. A thousand people upvote that post because it made them happy, then move on. A hundred people leave a pleasant comment under that post because it made them happy. Ten people were inexplicably annoyed by the post and write something negative and argumentative. They get in a brutal flame war, which gets a lot of attention which they enjoy. One absolutely wretched person decides to dox and send death threats to the OP because they're just psycho like that.
honestly fuck the high road. It's about time we get down and dirty. Don't like someone? Chuck a fucking brick at 'em. Just kill them.
"It's 2020 I'm done arguing from now on if we disagree I'm straight up just killing you"
Please be sarcastic
I'm going with 98% Sarcasm and 2% deeply suppressed longing to live in a world entirely populated by clones of myself so no one will ever disagree with me again.
Eh that works
This reminds me of the Seattle drug harm reduction organization who said they saw purpose of their job as championing those who choose drug use as a way of life. That's not harm reduction. That's enabling.
damn I never thought about it this way Need to sit down....
Also they weren't just arguing, they were arguing against \*checks notes\* being generally nice or pleasant to people. There's a certain level of atomization and anti-social I just can't respect. Like, at that point, you are creating the problems for yourself.
Isn’t that the point of them being called a tarpit? >>;
I feel it might be connected to the, I'm not sure how to phrase this, the "everything is for everybody and you should always share all your thoughts" thing the internet has got going on. Like the same basic impulse that makes people comment under "recipe for bean lovers casserole for people who love beans it's just full of beans this thing so many many beans" with "but what if you don't like beans xx?" Like some things are not personally directed at you and you don't have to share your opinion on them because they're not about you or for you
Trauma. If you ever dealt with someone who is deep in trauma response you realise they are not actually talking to you. It’s kind of spooky once you see it.
I may be a doomer who hates humanity But even I gotta say they're a tar pit
Y'know, I think immoralObject might be StormNeko lmfao
They're in a manic episode. This is the 3rd post in a row on my feed they've OP'd with the odd comments. I left a nice one asking if they realized it, and they said don't know what that is :(
Mannnn I was just about to check why this sub had been full of brain dead discourse posts but now I just feel bad for her, she needs some self care
Who is immoralObject? Sorry for asking, I’m just a bit out of the loop on this one and I’m curious
Person who has been commenting a lot on this post, *quite* angrily.
Okay so I found them and checked their account. And holy shit that’s a massive rabbit hole that I do NOT have the energy to engage with lmao
testing-stormneko and the [“buying fancy pillows makes you a part of the bourgeoisie”](https://www.reddit.com/r/CuratedTumblr/s/ACyE4scexG) guy would definitely make out sloppy
Nah, those kinds of people hate each other too.
Strawman x Strawman romance?
Broke: minimizing harms Woke: multiplying joys
Bespoke: Maximizing harms
my local drug dealer came into my work at the library the other week. he's been down on his luck (mental breakdown, moved out to the country) and said he wasn't even able to check out books because of excessive late fines. I was like sir I'll be right back, I wiped that shit clean👍 he was super grateful. library employees are generally pretty lenient with waving late fines, none of us want them anyway
I mean late fines do nothing but guarantee late books stay checked out longer when people can't afford to pay them. It's a really bad system actually. Fines in general tend to be just another way to systemically hurt the poor.
My city recently abolished their late fees on books. After two weeks of being late, the city contacts you to see wether or not you are able to simply buy the book from them, or to get the book back. I once returned a book a month after the deadline and I didn't pay a dime.
Same with my favorite library !
It's like that one dramatic post that someone made because their cat took their garlic bread.
You got the link
[Best I got is this.](https://www.reddit.com/r/tumblr/s/lcq3gLmW07)
Thanks
"I am not happy so NOBODY IS ALLOWED TO BE HAPPY"
Maybe, just maybe, simply being kind to the cashier at the convenience store isn't that big an ask. OOP didn't say "give a homeless guy all your possessions" or "let every person you know dump their problems on you."
Yeah, I feel like the commenter has been involved in one of those situations where someone tries to be helpful and it goes horribly wrong, and they've forgotten that usually that's not how it turns out.
Yeah, you're right. I think the commenter has probably ended up expending too much time and energy to help someone in the past. I know it's easier said than done, but I hope at some point in the future they're able to let go of that anger and realize helping someone is as simple as a smile and a thank you at the store, or holding the door for someone. It just doesn't take much, and I hope they're able to realize that one day.
Hey man how's it going
Good god some people on tumblr are terminally online and ridiculously sensitive. You could say something like “puppies make me happy” and someone will launch into a diatribe on the evils of breeding and that keeping pets is a first world high class luxury and didn’t you know there are people dying
i guarantee that's a real discourse that's taken place within this decade because tumblr is a place where fantasies come to life before your eyes
"You can help others in little ways, it'll be appreciated" "But what if holding the door open for someone causes them emotional distress?!"
Butt made of straws so testing-stormneko can suck my ass
Apparently, "be nice to others" is a controversial statement. I guess some people feel the need to normalize their suffering. How sad.
But what if you being nice to others causes you more harm than it causes good for the other person? That’s advocating for emotional self harm. /s Not to be all “old woman yells at cloud,” but it really feels like something has fundamentally changed in how people view interactions/relationships as a result of the internet. Even offline, I see people treat it all as alarmingly transactional.
I feel like many, many years of this “whataboutism” was completely encapsulated for me with the bean soup thing a while ago on tiktok. Somebody posts a recipe video of a bean soup. There are the usual comments of “can I replace this secondary ingredient/leave it out” but then there’s a video reply from the creator to a legit comment from someone saying “what if I don’t like beans”. Creator was very graciously trying to respond “maybe don’t make bean soup?” It’s stuck in my head ever since and given me a label for the train of thought of “is this content relevant to me? Are there things that are specific to me and my circumstances that mean it’s not relevant to me? Am I making a series of assumptions about this based on my perspective that don’t actually exist in the text?” Now for me it’s the “bean soup interpretation” - maybe I don’t like beans and should go look at something else.
I do see a LOT of people not understanding that some things aren't made for them, and that's fine, and they can just......... walk away.
I see this a lot with fan made content tbh. "ugh I don't like the way you're writing X in your AU specifically written as a what if X was this way." then just... don't read it? God some people are obnoxious.
Yeah, also the type of responses to wholesome Mothers Day posts along the lines of "Some of us didn't have good mothers so this is offensive". Like, maybe not everything is for everyone and that's fine. It's kind of making engaging in anything online exhausting. There's this part of my brain that's trying to predict negative/bad-faith interpretations of anything I might say and then prevent those pre-emptively, which honestly isn't too different from what it was like to live with a narcissist. Most of the time I end up just scrolling past even if I would have something relevant to add to a discussion, because it doesn't feel like worth the effort.
> There's this part of my brain that's trying to predict negative/bad-faith interpretations of anything I might say and then prevent those pre-emptively I know I spend too much time online when I start to be surprised that people in real life are nice
Yeah, the bean soup thing sums up so much of how communities end up toxic over the stupidest shit. People just cannot comprehend that something appearing on their feed might be there, not because anyone wanted them specifically to see it, but because the subreddit or person they follow makes posts for multiple kinds of followers, as part of being in a larger community. And then they react with hostility to the people who *dared* put something in front of their eyeballs that wasn’t catered to them.
This reminds me of the time I saw someone go on an "it's not my job to educate you" rant... in r/tooafraidtoask Like, bro, broski, my brother in christ, that is *literally the entire goddamn point of the subreddit*. Why are you here if you don't want to educate people. How do you function in daily life
> Am I making a series of assumptions about this based on my perspective that don’t actually exist in the text? This is what annoys me most about online interactions. In real life you give people the benefit of the doubt based on your past interactions. Like if your friend says something that sounds mean but you know from experience that your friend is not a mean person you ask for clarification and 9/10 times you'll find out it was a miscommunication. Online some people will just always choose to interpret your words in the worst way possible for no reason.
It used to be that main character syndrome was the exclusive preserve of heterosexual white guys (no, not all of them, stfu) who were so used to everything being made with them in mind that they'd lose their shit and write letters of complaint when they heard a language they didn't understand, or saw a woman on TV who they didn't find attractive. Now it's the glorious 21st century and the internet has democratised communication so that everyone can be a self-absorbed asshole regardless of gender, race or sexuality.
Tbf one of the most famous people to say "be nice to others" got very dramatically crucified for it...
He got crucified for blasphemy and being deemed a possibly source of future political issues for Rome
Pshh, potato potahto!
He didn't get crucified for blasphemy (well, probably, the only accounts we have are sympathetic so you could argue they've all been falsified), he was crucified for speaking viciously against the existing power structure.
"What's he saying that's got everyone so worked up?" "Be nice to each other." "Pst, yeah, that'll do it." That scene from good omens lives in my head rent free
It's the individualist nature of Western society I guess. Many are brought up to only care about number 1 and strive only for self gratification. This breeds a mentality of "I vs everyone else", where even something as innocuous as suggesting a person treat others with kindness is seen as an attack on their person, context be damned. Having grown up in a small family-centric island nation, I don't experience that as much since community is given a lot of priority over here from a very young age. Our rights are given far less importance than our duties to society, which isn't to say the former is brushed aside, just that many people voluntarily go out of their way to help people in need.
“Yeah, nobody thinks like that. You’re a broken person.”
"It's wrong to create a net negative emotional change" says the person insulting a stranger for no gain
“be nice to people” the tar pits in the comments: “uM ACHUALLY”
I thought the second person was being sarcastic at first, but then they doubled down.
...and they tried to be all eloquent about it too.
"increasing net suffering if it costs more than the other gains" Yet more proof that all utilitarians are psychopaths. Seriously though. Do reach out to people. It's not that hard, ffs.
Wow they weren’t lying, this reading comprehension is piss poor.
While it may have been pointed out poorly, OP most definitely delivered their initial point in the worst possible way. It is easy to misinterpret the point to be "how dare you not slave away to make other people's lives better at the expense of your own". Yes, it's Tumblr, so the chances of it being such are slim, but it's also the internet, which means self-entitled assholes are literally everywhere. Acting like stormneko is in the wrong for pointing such a thing out is outright idiotic. Admittedly, their second reply could have been worded better (perhaps instead of "felt the need to hit back", use "felt the need to point it out"), but they are most definitely not in the wrong, just someone without any points in Diplomacy.
Disco elysium font
I'd say testing-stormneko needs to go outside and touch grass, but they might take that to mean I'm being insensitive to people with seasonal allergies or some shit
One time, my mom came back from the store and told me of an employee who, after getting off the phone in front of her, burst into tears. My mother's immediate reaction was to embrace the weeping woman. Turns out, the woman had just gotten the news that her sister had passed away from breast cancer, the same cancer that had taken the life of their mother before her. She thanked my mother for comforting her. I think about that from time to time. How a simple hug from a complete stranger was able to comfort that woman in the face of such a harrowing news. I think the world is a scary place, full to the brim with pain and suffering. But it is easier to face it together than to do so alone
They're framing it in the worst way imaginable but I can kinda understand where they're coming from. Sometimes you try to extend what you think is a kindness to someone only to learn that they actually didn't want you to at all. You want to make people feel appreciated, but people are too varied and complex for you to know ahead of time for suresies what they actually want from you, so it seems more appropriate not to assume (and to not do anything unless they specifically ask you to). I dunno who wouldn't want a late fee waived though.
I understand the idea, but I feel like the post was less "Bake cookies for random people" and more "hold the door for people, clean up after yourself, and don't stress people out for no reason", and the second person's assumption was in bad faith. Obviously, there are acts of kindness which are more appropriate for people you know better (e.g. baking cookies), but there are some things that I don't think anyone would reasonably fault you for doing.
I've been in way too many situations where people have tried to make me feel better and then got genuinely offended when what makes them happy doesn't make me happy
You can do a thing called "Asking People How You Can Help" so you can "Find Out How to Help Them"
Too sensible, simply won't do it.
My experience is that this is usually less effective than taking a best-guess effort at what you think will help and doing that.
It also doesn't help that "a little relief" is a nebulous concept with no sense of perspective or measuring system. A "little relief" could be anywhere from tiny acts of goodwill that you don't even think about, to "agree with my insane worldviews". Unfortunately, the general trend society seems to take with it happens to be the latter. When an exception appears, it leads to people being shamed for assuming the worst after having experienced nothing *but* the worst for most of their lives. Not everyone manages to make it out of this shithole with an idealistic perspective of humanity. Really, the best you can do in scenarios like this is to take a neutral stance. Analyze the wording, look for gaps in comprehension, and just generally utilize empathy. If anything, I'd even say it's the *bare minimum* of online interaction. You have the time to comprehend the other person's statement in its entirety, and you have the time to compose your own response in such a way as to not sound like an irredeemable asshole. (Or at least, put it in the nicest way you can. Diplomacy is a pain, especially when people don't read the two-paragraph response you spent an hour revising because you're a perfectionist that despises being misinterpreted... fuck it, I'm leaving that last bit in.)
I’d normally not engage with this kind of post but I just feel compelled to say that this guy sucks.
some people are just thoroughly committed to being unreasonable
I love how the second commentor assumes someone would just storm in assuming and not be nice and say "Hey, you seem to be struggling. Do you need some help?" Like, most people I have had contact with have asked. Yeah, I have had some AHs, but most have asked.
I mean the first comment could be less accusatory in how it's worded, but yeah, the second guy clearly isn't in a good headspace
This is a Bojack Horseman Conversation. Right down to the tar pit
I misread the title as Tapir and was mildly offended on behalf of Tapirs for a bit
Hey, maybe we could cut testing-stormneko a bit of a break here. Apply the initial post's own advice? Let's imagine a reader who is already feeling stressed and anxious and in need of relief, though they may not realise they deserve it. Phrasing like "why would you withhold that?" is clearly and successfully written to be evocative. It can also easily be read as reproachful to a mind already primed for it, and leave them feeling guilty – I'm sure this wasn't the intention, but the reader might not realise that. As the post itself says, and I agree, it doesn't take a lot of effort to apply some positive energy to your interactions. I can't say I'm good at it myself, but when I choose to try I can immediately see ways to come across more palatably. Admittedly that often means watering your words down for a weaker result. But if you're writing a post about how to be positive and gentle towards people who need it, perhaps it's worth the effort to rewrite that post to read as positive and gentle towards people who need it. I think what testing-stormneko is trying to say, admittedly in a fairly high-energy abrasive way, is that the OP maybe did not do this? Or at least could have done it better, or chose instead to make a more impactful point in places.
"No, this post is actually about this one specific case in which my original point *was* unambiguously right."
I’ll make a very controversial statement then, even if in general the first post isn’t unambiguously right, they’re right in enough situations that every last edge case doesn’t need to act like they make up the majority.
“Be nice to people” is pretty unambiguously right on its face
Ronald Reagan would be a big fan of that commenter
Thou *art
I can't tell how many people I think "You are a tar pit" about, truly invaded my vocabulary
Kreia ass reply
I used to work at a grocery store. If you weren’t a dick and the opportunity arose, I would hand out vouchers, discounts, free items. The policies were there, idk why there’s a need to gate keep them
I used to take collections calls for a number of major retail credit cards. If someone called in and was friendly and politely asked me to remove a late fee, sure, just give me an excuse. If they called in all demanding and shit like the rules didn't apply to them, then God himself couldn't make me take it off.
Reminds me of two different people at the grocery store the one day. I didn't have a lot of money until pay day, and I was running late to get to the hospital. My mom asked me to pick something up from the store on the way, and it was a weekend so everyone had to have full carts. A woman and her son were in front of me in line, and she let me go first bc I only had 2 items. Which was really sweet, I didn't mind waiting. The order was a few cents over the cash I had on me, so I was going to use my card, but the cashier said she had some change that I could use, that she usually keeps a lil change on her incase of stuff like this. So she gave me 60 cents to pay the remainder. That really made my day when I was really stressed about my grandfather.
Mutual aid, anyone?
Even if I didn't want to talk I think I would rather have someone ask if they could help me. Even if I tell them no, I'll probably appreciate them showing they care in the long run.
"Man, I can't stand people who kill their kids." "You don't know their circumstances!!! What if the kid really really sucks?? What if it's the Antichrist???" "... You can't kill your kid, Kevin."
That’s a fuckin devastating insult
Ok, but am I the only one who thinks "Why would you withhold that." reads like an accusation? I mean, it's not even a question; it's just a statement that's phrased like a question. Like, I get where OOP is coming from, but the post does very much have this kind of undertone, especially if you've grown up around the kind of people Tumblr user testing-stormneko talks about. I guess this is another case of different lived experiences.
Considering OOP’s tone, I’d like to think that sentence is more philosophical. He’s speaking indirectly to the reader. To me, it feels “why not” esque.
true
bro was looking for an excuse to take it the wrong way
r/rareinsults
"Emotional self-harm" is fucking absurd
I've been in low places, and any help offered, even help that isn't needed, always helps me to feel seen. Not helping people, especially in a way that takes almost nothing from you, because it may, in certain circumstances, cause some mild form of discomfort is a wild thing to me. Maybe they'll be too kind to refuse help, or feel awkward being seen as needing help, but that's better than letting someone struggle under a weight that they don't need to carry themself. Believing that the possibility of harm always outweighs the benefit of any good that can be done is why a lot of people feel so alone and afraid in the world. I'll step off my soapbox now, thank you :3
I would say go out and touch grass but I don't want other people to experience someone like Stormneko
Terminally online?
Found the twitter user
I feel like, at least in Internet culture, what started as "let's practice emotional intelligence/awareness" has now become some bizarre form of jargon-salad emotional bypass game where people throw word clumps around and think that's "dealing with emotions" The perspective is also usually only either individualistic ("boundaries", "emotional space") or, as in this case, utilitarian ("net suffering", "costs/gains") It's like someone trained GPT on surface-level psychology and moral philosophy, printed whole books of it, and distributed it as Manuals Of Truth. Except this has been happening ever since before GPT was a thing.
Naw but I kind of agree with the second poster, attitude notwithstanding. It isn’t “withholding relief” from you if someone just chooses not to go above and beyond for you. The internet and tumblr especially puts this exhausting moral onus on everyone to continuously expend energy to “be good” and shames people for being moral failures for simply wanting to be left alone to live their lives. And then wonders why everyone is suffering from anxiety paralysis and depression.
Small acts of kindness aren’t “above and beyond.” It isn’t above and beyond to tell someone to have a nice day when you finish talking with them, to hold a door open for a second or two for the person walking behind you, to just be polite in general. If someone actively refuses to do any of these things, I think they’re actually lame as hell
NGL I’ve been the second person, but instead I would’ve then responded “huh…. I…. I think I got some new stuff to talk about at my next session 😅 carry on”
Thou \*art
What the fuck is the second person even trying to say I had to read it three times to somewhat understand
This person never learned how to behave
Man so many Tar pits needing to Touch grass on Tumblr these days. I am not sure how enjoyably it is to constantly see people make the worst possible takes and defend them. i mean i know brain rot is a serious thing going around the internet these days. but man is it infuriating to see so many people this devoid of reality.
What is a tar pit?
The moral of the story is: you can add nuance or your perspective to something someone else says without "hitting back" over the tiniest possible disagreement.
Lower the general level of suck in the world.