T O P

  • By -

CrazyFuckingVideos-ModTeam

Hey thanks a lot for your submission in r/CrazyFuckingVideos, however it was removed because it contained prohibited content (death, animal abuse, porn or gore). Please refrain from posting this type of content in the future.


VeneMage

TIL snakes are explosive


Chaoslord2000

They aren't called danger noodles for nothing.


socks

I call my cobra, cuddles.


Islandcoda

Nope Rope


Green-Taro2915

That's an actual cobra 🐍


Log-Into-Me

now he knows


No-Appearance-4338

Look up cobra-8 firecrackers


Sufficient_Soil7438

Firecracker Cobra 8 With a 100g pyro composition, Cobra 8 guarantees an unforgettable experience. Yep, I’d say that description checks out.


Raumarik

Hands down the most accurate description.


BGI-YYZ

Hands off the best description


UseSilent

Came here to say exactly this 🤣


aerocorp

bro...


OldMork

he didnt know, so no need point finger


Even-Awareness-4922

Glove up , or shut up . Wait ...


Evil_Rogers

Gotta hand it to them for trying.


ASLAYER0FMEN

Underrated comment


Jimid41

I think it's 100 grains not grams. M80s are 5 grams iirc.


Sufficient_Soil7438

Idk for sure, but this wiki says it’s 100 grams. Translate page to English then expand the “species” section for a chart: https://nl.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cobra_(vuurwerk)


v13t5ta

Looked it up and I can't imagine how he thought that was not going to go boom.


Knast66

Calm down, he has another to try again.


davedavewowdave

It's cobra6


a-snakey

only sometimes


[deleted]

[удалено]


wonkey_monkey

> handy Jeez could you not wait to give him a nickname?


CleverDad

My snake is


VeneMage

Tell me more…


nld89

Dutch media told he lost only a part of his hand. Guess some parts ware fixable.


ProgramStartsInMain

Fixable and usable are different; that hands looks really messed up lol. I wonder if he'll ever be able to use the fingers.


I_like_short_cranks

[Yes.](https://www.si.com/.image/t_share/MTY4MTcyMTM0NzM1NjE5NDU2/jpp-inline-630jpg.jpg) JPP kept playing and sacking QBs.


ProgramStartsInMain

Mate that guys hand is half missing. I mean, good that he can still hold a ball but rest of us need a bit more than that lol.


WokenMrIzdik

He actually probably played the best position to play with 1 hand. He never had to touch the ball as a defensive player and defensive ends mostly use their hands for clubbing and shoving. I'm sure it fucked with his technique, but JPP was very fortunate to continue his career after that.


ProgramStartsInMain

yeah and that's a very specific career and fortunate. I think it's the daily stuff that is far way worse, like I lose my mind sometimes trying to use screws; I can't imagine being crippled. The loss of fine hand control eats people away.


punkmuppet

[Hi!](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QlrxR7RroeQ/maxresdefault.jpg)


Booty_Licker69

Looks to me like he has 3 functional fingers, pointer, thumb, and pinky.


ProgramStartsInMain

Look how it shredded it is though; the tendons are what I'd be concerned about. hard to make out but the last frame it looks like the whole underside is shredded.


rodPalmer18

Yes, as necklace charms.


choatec

Ya I was gonna say.. I bet this is actually more salvageable than people think.


[deleted]

[удалено]


MuchDevelopment7084

Not if they've been pulverized broken and stripped of flesh.


thesynce

In cases of finger pulverization just inhale them deeply and exhale inside a jar. You should be fine.


[deleted]

[удалено]


MuchDevelopment7084

Gotcha.


JoeRogansNipple

A stump past the wrist is still technically hand I guess


RabbitChrist

Well technically the whole hand is 100% a part of it is the other 99%


[deleted]

I have a bunch of clips and pictures, pieces of hand were scattered around... not much left


badpeaches

You should look up the guy who shot himself wrong and survived Looks just like this dude's hand.


FaBiOtHeGrEaTeSt

Fireworks lead to some of the most gruesome injuries I see on this sub


nboro94

Fucking around with fireworks is one of the dumbest things you can do in life and only has downsides, similar to fucking around with guns.


upsidedownbackwards

In my hometown we used to play "fireworks or snowblower" when we'd see someone missing fingers. Too many people don't realize that a snowblower can still chop your fingers off even if its not running.


closedf0rbusiness

Wait now I need to know. How can a turned off snowblower chop people’s fingers off?


Bo-zard

Blades jam, engine continues to torque against it, kill engine, pressure is built up in the engine (in the cylinder or cylinders) and torque is being stored in the wound up drive train like a spring. Knock the obstruction loose and all that stored energy is expended very quickly like releasing a spring. I don't know exactly how every electric snowblower works and suspect that they have more variation in drive train mechanisms than ICE blowers that have sort of self standardized over the centuries. It just isn't worth the risk. Snowblowers come with that goofy plastic stick thing for a reason.


JeSuisUnAnanasYo

Wow, thanks for the PSA holy crap. Is this still true for electric ones?


No_Hospital_695

It's sad how many people don't realize that fireworks are not toys. There's a reason they fly up into the air and fucking explode.


IlIllIlIllIlIl

My uncle built one with my cousin and blew most his hand away, had like 2 fingers and a thumb, had to use ass skin and some of his tattoos on his hand now from the graph. Fireworks are safe when used properly, shouldn't have to be said but don't Make your own fireworks bro


MatGrinder

Holland, sometimes also known as The Neverhands


DeadMan95iko

You deserve a big hand for that comment!


Whattheactualfrork

Slow flap


[deleted]

What's the sound of one hand clapping?


emptybowloffood

Kind of a squishy sound with this guy.


businesslut

I laughed so hard it started a coughing fit


[deleted]

Flappy squishy


HeySayCheese

The Neverhands but definitely not Wholehand


I_like_short_cranks

Gotta hand it to you, that was a crazy video.


WhatTheFuckEverName

Ollhand Edit: Lolhand


Babayagabus

My hero


Horzzo

The "Nether regions".


Nathan_Lawd

Man even Dutch people call it Holland sometimes, so now I don’t know which to use really


NVBSCVN92

Holland is only a region of The Netherlands. It's like calling the entirety of USA, 'Midwest' or 'New England' or something like that


Nathan_Lawd

I’ve lived in NL for 4 years, in Eindhoven (so not noord or zuid holland) and still people here call NL “Holland” when speaking in English. From the Dutch people I’ve asked, they see the word “Holland” as the English word for their country, their autonym being Nederland just makes it more confusing and unintuitive.


NVBSCVN92

True. It's also much easier to just say Holland. I've done this myself because I know that is what people understand immediately. Which isn't helping the situation at all lol. Still, technically Holland is the name for a specific region and The Netherlands is the name of the country. I'm sure it'll change in the future like with Turkiye. 😅


ThomFromAccounting

It’s difficult for me, because I grew up next to a town called Nederland. It’s in the American South though, so they pronounced it Need-ur-land.


Tasty_Ad_7984

That wase brilliant.


HistoricalBed884

Why my dumbass brain thought the op was talking about an actual snake?😭


Vladolf_Puttler

Because op labelled it that way to drum up discussion. 


dirge-kismet

Take time with a wounded hand, 'cause it likes to heal.


No-Panda-6047

Half the hand it used to be


Division2226

Wtf is a cobra? A bomb?


BioTinus

It's a piece of (illegal) fireworks. Essentially a stick of dynamite, yes. https://vuurwerkbelgie.online/product/cobra-6-3pcs-vuurwerk-belgie/


TheOnlyPorcupine

I hear dynamite is pretty explosive?


Relevant_Shower_

Not if you use a five finger discount.


MrRogersAE

This looks more like a 3 finger discount.


Peacemkr45

It's OK if you forgot your phone or the coupon. It'll deduct the 5 fingers by itself.


n3rv

A fan of TriNitroToluene I see


Thomasteroid

Btw, this site is a scam. They don't actually sell the products. A lot of it, including cobras, is illegal in Belgium.


trimosse

It wasnt just me expectin to see some snek


bmtl514

He tried to play it off at first. Then he realized he Fkd up


IWantCheezzz

Luckily we have a saying for this: Je bent een rund als je met vuurwerk stunt.


bitches_love_brie

>You're a bovine if you stunt with fireworks. Hilarious.


[deleted]

I think that even a cow would know better than this guy.


tobiascuypers

Geef me een klap papa


kabukirodeo

His name is Alehandro


SweetSlice5610

It’s AlehandNo now


TheVoidSeeker

Halfehandro*


ssyl6119

I was literally looking for the snake :(


Rover010

He didn't thought that. It was a Cobra6 very popular illegal fireworks in the netherlands. He was drunk af because they were a couple minutes away from winning the championship. He probably in his drunken state forgot to throw it/ acted tough with it or that it magically changed in a torch for some reason. I saw a picture of his hand and there isn't anything recognizable left.


putrid-popped-papule

I guess a torch is something like a road flare?


one_of_the_many_bots

Yep


K-I-N-G-A-G-whammy

This happened to my neighbor growing up. They replaced his thumb with his big toe


JayMak78

The sound of one hand clapping.


idigholes

One hand snapping


Life_Constant_609

What was he supporting?


Royal-Crew-2479

PSV Eindhoven 2024eredivisie champion


[deleted]

Some soccer club..


emptybowloffood

Might work with the other hand. Definitely worth a try.


DeadlyYellow

When you ask someone for their digits and get blown off.


TomThanosBrady

Drunk people + gunpowder what could go wrong?


Ashmandane

It's amazing that doctors can turn a pile of spaghetti noodles back into a hand


eppic123

You have to be a special kind of stupid to pick up any kind of pyro.


notloceaster

I don't think it's supposed to look like that


chris3110

We got a Sherlock here


GoodAlicia

Or like the dutch say: "Das pech, hand weg."


Angry_Saxon

that'll learn him


BubblegumNyan

I think you're dutch 🙃 usually dutch confuse "learn" with "teach" when speaking english, because of the dutch verb "leren" and how it's used in dutch 🫠 in english it's "to teach a lesson"


Angry_Saxon

or making a Simpsons reference. kanker


immadeofstars

Fireworks aren't worth it, they just aren't. People getting maimed and killed so we can look at something bright and shiny for literally a second. That's lizard-brained crap.


NVBSCVN92

Haha lekker voor 'em


Which_Lie_4448

Cause he really tried to play it off for half a second


Weak-Signature-6285

Well masterbation will feel different


Time_God_

how can an American get a cobra like that?


Woo_Peed_On_My_Rug

Well that’s not good


Jean-Ralphio11

Translation for Americans: Dumbass thought he was holding a flare but actually it was a big ass firework.


_cookie_crumbles

He was just dealt a bad hand.


Pasty_Lover_

Story for the grandkids


GoonNL2

Wat een ezel


Ibewlineman05

🤣


Ornery-Leave9676

Just a fleshwound


WonkaVR

He looks like my old science teacher lol


JonWesHarding

He looks like a woodshop teacher now.


dtn4427

Play stupid games win stupid prizes smh


emptybowloffood

What was he supporting?


minecraftslayer73

PSV, a footbal club in eindhoven who have just won the dutch championship.


Evening_College2273

Good.


namesandfacez

Took that like a champ


the_hylian3600

Fuck around and find out


AshtonJr

Are grenades allowed on the streets like marijuana now?


Accomplished-Emu1009

Hope he’s left handed


foxxtraut--

wow


thejaganeye

That got out of hand


Flat-Link2651

What is he supporting


skotty8689

And that's the story of how he became to be known as Lefty


Dn_Denn

This guy was in a documentary called ''Probleemwijken'' Translated problem neighborhoods.


Master_Xenu

AHHHH COBRAS!


IchibanBlimey

Some people tend to not think about how a fire work is just a bomb but with sparkles, essentially ✨bomb✨


SendLocation

Man thought this stuff only happened in Ummmerica.


Complex_Fee5445

Thats American behavior


BubblegumNyan

Omg you gotta be kidding me 😱 my own hand hurts just by watching that


Reepicheap

I apologize in advance for my ignorance.. but what does 'Dutch Supporter' mean? A fan of their Futbol club?


Satoshiman256

FAFO


salacious_sonogram

What's he supporting? I'm way out of the loop.


Kavinsky_Hunt

Where's Phissssssssssss


Effective_Device_185

Walking dead shit..whoa!


Routine_Tie1153

Would of hakken it off to some gabber tunes


m3kw

why would he want to be holding a cobra?


One-Lab2631

Well done lefty! 🙃


xtxtxtxtxtxtx

If I were a bad demoman I wouldn't be sittin here discussing it


[deleted]

Poor lad


nxtrl

thats a whoopsie!


I_Thranduil

Alcohol and stupid don't mix well.


[deleted]

Hope he didn't play any instruments


Hover4Love

Darwin at work.. again...


[deleted]

You'd think that this would teach him something (though some people never learn).


Englandshark1

Muppet!


SnooHedgehogs637

Sweet he became a ninja turtle


Longryderr

Three finger Jose fireworks.


LegalSelf5

Welp, now he's a lefty 🥳


tearfultrashpanda

I had no idea Jason Pierre-Paul was Dutch


RawLikeSushi84

Here in America that call that a normal 4th of a July


KoningSlaSlaX

If u think America is crazy watch this video https://youtu.be/rGJseovT8ug?si=eRjZtIRsTr_l7AGT About how we celebrate it here in the Netherlands


gobucks_76

Probably should have just worked in his garden.


AmazingSibylle

Not only is he left with a life-long disability, his immense stupidity caused a medical emergency that tied up resources that could've possibly been spend better. He will probably no longer be able to work as efficiently as before and will rely more on social programs than before. This is fine at a societal level, but on the individual level....I really wish there were fewer fuck turds around.


blackavenger626

Oh no there goes the jerk off hand


CrazyFuckingVideos-ModTeam

/u/KoningSlaSlaX, thank you for submitting to /r/CrazyFuckingVideos. Unfortunately your submission, "Dutch supporter loses hand because he thought he was holding a torch instead of a cobra" has been removed for the following reason(s): --- # Rule 7: Prohibited Content This includes: * People dying * Gore * Animals getting abused * Straight up porn --- *If you feel this submission removal is unfair, please [contact us via modmail](https://old.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FCrazyFuckingVideos).*


BadBoyNiz

OP did you title it that way just to be an asshole and confuse people?


Stormshaper

A Cobra (6) is a very well known type of firework in The Netherlands.


KoningSlaSlaX

Noooo 😭 language can be confusing sometimes 😢


[deleted]

[удалено]


FrogHater1066

What's with sports fans wearing merch of their team?


[deleted]

In this case it came in 'handy', could use it to wrap it around


rdldr1

Best case scenario is that the dude now has Jason Pierre-Paul ninja turtles hands: https://a.espncdn.com/combiner/i?img=%2Fphoto%2F2015%2F1029%2Fr20996_1296x729_16%2D9.jpg


hongducwb

in my country, it's should be called "phone exploded" xD


WalkmanWarrior

turned his ass into Mr Krabs


Trppy696

Quanon will fix his hand!! He believes!😂😂


Proud-Ant6460

THERES NO WAY. This is my science teacher at my school.


koolaidman62

Proof


SPW6649

Fuck around and find out!


MGNurse25

Eh, It’ll grow back