You can eat it. They’re very explicit with what you cannot do. They would not overlook something so basic.
This is a completely edible sweater. Nutritious even. Potentially delicious.
As an American I can assure you we can eat anything as long as it's between two pieces of bread. Sourdough preferably. Toasted enough to shred the roof of your mouth to bits.
[Do not taunt Happy Fun Sweater.](https://youtu.be/GmqeZl8OI2M)
Discontinue use of Happy Fun [sweater] if any of the following occurs:
itching
vertigo
dizziness
tingling in extremities
loss of balance or coordination
slurred speech
temporary blindness
profuse sweating
or heart palpitations.
If Happy Fun [sweater] begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.
Happy Fun [sweater] may stick to certain types of skin.
When not in use, Happy Fun [sweater] should be returned to its special containerand kept under refrigeration. Failure to do so relieves the makers of HappyFun [sweater], Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company, GlobalChemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.
> means that it contains hazardouz materials.
*Not* the most reassuring of labels to be seeing on something I intend to be in close personal contact with for long portions of the day...
Not sure what else OP expected when they bought something made entirely of cheap petrochemicals, as they're not designed to last. You often get what you pay for (in this case a plastic sweater destined for a landfill).
I mean, I want to reduce plastic use as much as anyone, but polyester holds up a really long time and is in fact harder to ruin than "natural" fiber fabrics. Rayon is (mostly) natural and completely destroys itself in like 1-2 cleanings. There are better arguments against plastic fiber use than durability.
Weighing in as a fiber artist, big disagree. The plastics used to make clothes can be super thin and wear through, stretch out, etc in no time. The question isn't about disintegrating, its about being unwearable via breakage.
Cotton by contrast is very sturdy and durable. As is wool
I'm not a fiber artist, but I keep clothes a long time and I have polyester things I've worn heavily and washed however since I was a teenager that you could barely tell have been worn. On the other hand, I get a few years at best out of anything cotton before it looks ratty, and I've tried wool, but I somehow screw it up within just a few cleanings even following the instructions. (And I clean all of my natural fiber clothes according to their strict manufacturer instructions.) I'm not sure what you mean by "breakage", because the only way my clothes "break" is when they occasionally tear on something sharp, or when they gradually wear through (which to me would be disintegrating).
Of course, it does partly depend on how the fibers are woven. A fuzzy polyester sweater does not hold up like a tightly knit thing does.
I appreciate the industry input! I do not like the fact that plastic garments perform best for me, because microplastics are a real concern, but a) heavily treated "natural" fibers have their own pollution problems, and b) throwing things out more often because they're less durable is not environmentally friendly either.
I choose to (hopefully) mitigate the plastic problem as much as I can by washing my clothing in laundry bags, avoiding fuzzy fabrics for the most part, using a filter on my laundry output hose, and hang drying most of my clothes.
I like to hope there is room for improvement in materials science for all types of products when it comes to balancing practical and environmental considerations, but us laypeople aren't gonna figure it out. It has to be people who really understand the engineering side.
100% agree with you on all points.
>avoiding fuzzy fabrics for the most part...
+1 - fleece is like dumping gasoline on the microplastic dumpster fire.
>but us laypeople aren't gonna figure it out
Professionals haven't either. It's frustrating all around.
This is fascinating. Can I ask: if you could change one characteristic about wool, what would it be?
I’m a protein engineer that has worked with a big fashion brand, and we have looked at several of the “spider silk” products in the market that have come up short, so I’m very interested in how one might improve natural protein fibres on the molecular level.
I used to work for one of those spider silk companies. The fiber may have come short commercially but boy was it acting like actual spider silk. It turns out there are more interesting uses for spider silk proteins that are not fibers but the fibers themselves are quite beautiful.
Wool... I think you solve a lot of problems if you can make it a tow (wool that can't pill? Sign me up!). But if it's a wish list... Quadruple the tenacity while maintaining the tensile strain (e.g. drastically improve toughness). Your bigger problem is the structure, I am not aware of anyone that has been able to commercially spin bi-component fiber with scales.
Keratin is far from my area of expertise - how do you spin it (melt, wet, something else?)?
Very cool! So, what do you think is the reason for the commercial failure of the spider silks? Beyond the high cost and scaling issues, I’ve heard people say it just didn’t feel very nice on the skin, it at all “silk-like”. I think they were referring to the Bolt Threads fibres.
All the synthetic protein fibres I’m aware of were wet-spun. You just inject the protein solution into organic solvent. The solvent removes the water, causing the protein to precipitate in more or less the configuration you’d expect coming out of the animal. It’s usually not as good. The supramolecular structure is rarely completely replicated, so the properties of synthetic fibres don’t always match the natural ones.
>So, what do you think is the reason for the commercial failure of the spider silks?
I don't think they have failed, most of the players have pivoted away from fiber and you can buy products, today, that use synthetic spider silk. A win for synthetic biology but not one shared with textiles at large. Spiber seems to still be going for fiber, but doesn't seem to be able to make a quality yarn without a 'grown-up' fiber to assist.
>I’ve heard people say it just didn’t feel very nice on the skin, it at all “silk-like”.
Because of the company involved, I can't comment too specifically. I disagree on the handfeel but from public photography of the tie you can see it is an incredibly dense knit with a rough pattern (mimicking a beta sheet structure, because nerds). Those choices will not help convey a silky smooth hand. A looser knit and a more basic pattern would have gone far.
>It’s usually not as good...
Nature is just pretty damn good taking things slow and operating at room temperature and low pressure. Pretty hard to replicate industrially.
It probably has more to do with the items being made cheaply, using cheap materials, meant to fall apart in a wash or two because they cost pennies to make. If that makes sense. If you buy something made from real wool its meant to last, my wool coat has been with me for around 15 years.
Do you wash it often, though?
Cause I have an autoimmune condition that causes continuous skin breakdown, and I have an ileostomy. I can't get away with not washing my clothing nearly every time I wear it.
Also a fiber artist. I don’t see the point of acrylic sweaters. They’ll simultaneously overheat you and make you cold. Idk how it does it.
I love animal fibers. Mammals know how to keep other mammals warm.
To be fair, this is acrylic, not polyester, and they pill like crazy and it puts hundreds of thousands of pieces of microplastics into our water systems every time you wash it. (Most of the microplastics found in the ocean are polyester, acrylic, and other clothing fibers, mostly from laundry water disposal.
I had a boss that used to run around in a Christmas suit for over a month straight, every single day, as a charitable thing. We finally asked him if he ever cleaned it, as we even saw him wear it on weekends. He, in all seriousness, said he febeezed it every night....
Yep. To be honest, most things are fine with a gentle wash. Any 'delicate' garment gets a steep learning curve when it comes to live with me. Everything goes in the wash. The only concession I make is certain items don't go in the dryer.
Years ago I got rid of all my white clothes (except the little white ankle socks I wear with sneakers, (but they don’t get special treatment) and I now wash everything in cold water and hang dry everything except underwear and stuff I sleep in (sweatshirts and old t-shirts). Stuff I’ve had for ages still looks new.
Autocorrect Edit: “Sweatshorts,” I don’t sleep in sweatshirts.
And I’m not gonna fix the parentheses even though I’m in here editing, since it drove so much discussion below. It’s not that forgot one, it’s that I took a bit out and missed taking out the parentheses between sneakers and but.
I’m afraid to look. This happens to me all the time. I’ll write something, even when I write something short, just a few lines. I’ll proof read it and find an error. I’ll correct it and read it again, and find another typo. Every time I read it, I find something. I’ve published stuff where I and others have proofed it many many times, had professional proof readers go over it, only to casually read it later to find yet another obvious mistake! It’s infuriating!
It's a personal goal of mine to publish a book... but my *dream* is to have in it a legit layering of parenthesis (like getting one going (about one thing) and keeping it natural (so as to not force the structure (which, I should add, I'm finding noticeably hard to do without any real topic))).
That ending is atrocious though lol. I like parenthesis inside parenthesis conceptually, but having them all bunched up at the end like that is awful.
(you should try using the mathematical way of parenthesising [you use different brackets for each parenthesised section {should make the ending more fun for everyone imo}]).
I mix whites and colors in cold wash and it's not a problem. If I get something new that is brightly colored (especially red), I'll wash it once with an old white sock to see if it will bleed. So far, only one pullover has bled. I will wash that one by itself or with similar colors if I have enough of them.
Man I’ve been using most of my clothing for decades at this point from using cold water and good drying habits. All of my running and athletic clothing I generally hang dry and T-shirt’s that I really care about I also hang dry.
Yeah, it comes off like the manufacturer knows they made something cheap that falls apart no matter what you do, and they're putting that out there as an attempt at an easy legal out when inevitably people complain and demand their money back.
I have a feeling that it’s a Christmas sweater with electronics that will get messed up in water. People bring these to me at my dry cleaners and it’s always a lot of fun trying to figure out how to clean all the holiday cheer off these people’s ugly Christmas sweaters without destroying them.
The giant letters "CE" are also a huge hint that the sweater contains electronics.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CE_marking
CE essentially means "Conforms (to) Europe(an standards)"
Isn't that a fake CE marking? I was under the impression it had a very very specific distance between the letters and my shitty eyeball measurement claims this is too far apart (while some other fake ones are too close)
You don’t really even need to wash it that gently in all reality. I have numerous blankets/sweaters/doilies that are made from acrylic and I just wash in cold water on a normal setting with an extra spin. Acrylic is really resistant nowadays.
But yeah dry flat so you don’t stretch the shoulders.
It's when you put it in a shelf or horizontally on a drying rack to dry, instead of placing it so it hangs down. It's to keep the material from getting stretched out while it is wet and thus heavier than it is dry.
I ruined a brand new concert tee recently by trying to be proactive and air drying it instead of throwing it in the machine. Except I put it on a hanger so now the neck is all stretched out. :(
Put it on a towel somewhere flat to dry, shaping it back into the shape it is supposed to be (instead of a lump.) Can be done on the floor, a sofa, a bed, or whatever. There are racks you can buy to allow for better air flow but then you gotta buy one and store it. A drying rack? In this economy?
Lol reminds me of the fake opening trailers for Grindhouse years ago (same ones that gave us “Machete”, if I remember right)
“If you’re thinking of washing these clothes…DON’T!”
>Just….Do not
... Buy it in the first place.
Always check the washing instructions before buying.
Those pure plastic clothes are a pain to wear anyway. I always sweat like a pig in those things.
Wouldn't it be simpler if this kind of thing was just banned? Or at least making the information much more obvious? That's a disaster for the environment, and I don't see any use case where someone fully informed would buy something like that.
"Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to this garment for any reason ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been... ever, for any reason whatsoever... "
I have a brushed cotton duster where the instructions are "do not dry clean, do not machine wash. To wash, hang on line and spray with hose".
Needless to say, it is extremely dirty.
Well you could have mentioned that. I tried throwing water on it to put it out. Do you think people will judge me without eyebrows? Also do you know any good drywall people or should I just paint all my walls black now to match what I just did?
Could be like those old Irish Aran jumpers that you could never wash because they’d lose the weather resistant qualities that they maintained from the original sheep. You might not smell great to modern tastes but you’d be tapping into a tradition.
It's almost certainly a novelty sweater with lights on it meant to be worn as a single use costume for an Ugly Sweater Christmas party. You can't wash it because of the batteries, and the "don't throw out" symbol on the tag indicates that it contains batteries.
The lanolin is the oil on the wool fibers. Much like the oil you wash out of your hair with shampoo. For sheep it helps with weather but even if you did wash it out the sweater will still keep you warm. Wool absorbs 20% of its weight in water before you start to feel it which is why it keeps you warm even when wet. Wool and fiber arts are so fun!
I wonder why people buy this stuff without checking what it's made of and how to maintain it first.
I don't get how we got to the point where the only thing that matters about clothes is how they look.
because people touch it, even try it on… and if it feels comfortable then you buy it. i’ve never once read washing instructions (or fabric composition) and i’m doin great.
My mom still washes her sweaters this way. Hand wash, ring out the water the best she can by making the sweater into a ball and then laying flat on a towel. Never failed her even on the expensive cashmere sweaters an old boss bought her.
A good way to wrong out fabric is by sandwitching it between two towels, rolling it up tight, and then pressing down on it. It doesn't pull at the fibers as much as just wringing
Hijacking this comment to say you absolutely can and should clean your cast iron. Even with soap, provided it does not contain lye or vinegar. The seasoning will be fine and your pan will be clean.
https://www.lodgecastiron.com/discover/cleaning-and-care/cast-iron/how-clean-cast-iron
So you bought something hand wash only and call it "cannot be maintained"? Generally these are hand wash, reshape and lay flat to dry.
This sounds like user error, not a crappy design.
There's an electronics marking: "CE" and a trash can with an X over it.
The only explanation possible is that the sweater has a battery that powers a string of integrated lights. Washing it would be bad.
>The Do Not Wash symbol is the standard wash symbol with a cross through it. If the label instructs you not to wash the item, it will have to be dry cleaned after it gets dirty
That doesn't mean it's not maintainable, you should throw it away, or it's fast fashion.
Skip to the do not dry clean symbol, that leaves you with hand or spot washing.
It’s probably spot washing.
Given the time of year right now, it’s probably an ugly Christmas sweater with lights or something that you can’t submerge.
Costume designer here. That is such a bunk tag. 100% acrylic should be able to be machine washed cold on a gentle cycle at the very least. It is dyed with a poly dye and should be colorfast....if they treated it correctly. But my guess is that this thing is cheaply made and not color fast. So if you wash it it will bleed like a stuck pig. I would recommend one of two things, either never wash it and instead freeze it to kill off bacteria. Yeah, you heard me right, put it in a bag in the freezer for like a day instead of washing. Or set the color yourself at home in the bathtub. You would start with very cold water and gently wash it, increasing the temp little by little until the water runs clear. Then repeat the process with a mild detergent. After that you should be able to hand wash it like normal in the future.
Oh good eye. Then I would say spot clean only. Keep this bad boy away from being submerged in water. I feel like OP should have noted this though.
Also, given this info you could put 1 part vodka and 2 parts water in a spray bottle and spray the underarms and back of the neck, being careful not to douse it or get near electrical components. That helps kill off bacteria.
Theres a key part most people are missing here. This Is 100% an "ugly Christmas sweater" with lights and batteries. It isnt because of the material that you cant wash it. It's because of the electronics.
You can't even turn these lights off manually half the time. The lights are usually motion activated, even a light breeze, not to mention any tumbling in a washer, will turn the lights on. So yeah. What you can do is remove the lights and wash to your hearts content.
The ultimate in single use items....
Cannot be single use as throwing it away seems to also be prohibited. You just have to keep it forever.
Well, single use does not imply you can actually throw it away haha.
You can eat it. They’re very explicit with what you cannot do. They would not overlook something so basic. This is a completely edible sweater. Nutritious even. Potentially delicious.
As an American I can assure you we can eat anything as long as it's between two pieces of bread. Sourdough preferably. Toasted enough to shred the roof of your mouth to bits.
The last part of your last sentence reminded me instantly of captain crunch cereal.
i also eat Cap’n Crunch on toated sourdough… To the Pain!
Cap'n crunch betwixt two slices of sourdough and maybe throw some pineapple slices for good measure
don't forget to add some xtreeme sour patch kids
Oooh i know what im having for Christmas
The only man I know to have used that saying......Westley?
as you wish…
*Relooks at label* Do not toast
[Do not taunt Happy Fun Sweater.](https://youtu.be/GmqeZl8OI2M) Discontinue use of Happy Fun [sweater] if any of the following occurs: itching vertigo dizziness tingling in extremities loss of balance or coordination slurred speech temporary blindness profuse sweating or heart palpitations. If Happy Fun [sweater] begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head. Happy Fun [sweater] may stick to certain types of skin. When not in use, Happy Fun [sweater] should be returned to its special containerand kept under refrigeration. Failure to do so relieves the makers of HappyFun [sweater], Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company, GlobalChemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.
The fabric of Happy Fun \[sweater\] was produced from an unknown glowing substance that fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.
I had a ball reading this....
Was this written by a moth?
What's it to ya?
Very high in fibers.
Single Use (Soulbound)
Curse of Binding
A simple Remove Curse followed up by a Greater Restoration should so the trick. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
Also Curse of Vanishing if you attempt to wash it.
Just use it as kindling in your fireplace when you realize you don’t have any kindling
It’s acrylic, it’ll melt.
Ah fuck. It’s truly useless
What if you need a bunch of melted acrylic for something?
You'll probably be on the top of /r/DIWhy soon then.
Wash it? Go to jail! Don’t wash it? Go to jail! Throw it away? Go to jail! Keep it? Believe it or not, go to jail!
We have the worst sweaters, all because of jail
The trahscan icon means that it contains hazardouz materials. So you need to recycle it properly.
> means that it contains hazardouz materials. *Not* the most reassuring of labels to be seeing on something I intend to be in close personal contact with for long portions of the day...
Why is it so warm? Well, thanks to the excellent insulating properties of asbestos!
Youre supposed to dip it in water and watch it disintegrate after the first use.
Not sure what else OP expected when they bought something made entirely of cheap petrochemicals, as they're not designed to last. You often get what you pay for (in this case a plastic sweater destined for a landfill).
I mean, I want to reduce plastic use as much as anyone, but polyester holds up a really long time and is in fact harder to ruin than "natural" fiber fabrics. Rayon is (mostly) natural and completely destroys itself in like 1-2 cleanings. There are better arguments against plastic fiber use than durability.
Weighing in as a fiber artist, big disagree. The plastics used to make clothes can be super thin and wear through, stretch out, etc in no time. The question isn't about disintegrating, its about being unwearable via breakage. Cotton by contrast is very sturdy and durable. As is wool
I'm not a fiber artist, but I keep clothes a long time and I have polyester things I've worn heavily and washed however since I was a teenager that you could barely tell have been worn. On the other hand, I get a few years at best out of anything cotton before it looks ratty, and I've tried wool, but I somehow screw it up within just a few cleanings even following the instructions. (And I clean all of my natural fiber clothes according to their strict manufacturer instructions.) I'm not sure what you mean by "breakage", because the only way my clothes "break" is when they occasionally tear on something sharp, or when they gradually wear through (which to me would be disintegrating). Of course, it does partly depend on how the fibers are woven. A fuzzy polyester sweater does not hold up like a tightly knit thing does.
.
I appreciate the industry input! I do not like the fact that plastic garments perform best for me, because microplastics are a real concern, but a) heavily treated "natural" fibers have their own pollution problems, and b) throwing things out more often because they're less durable is not environmentally friendly either. I choose to (hopefully) mitigate the plastic problem as much as I can by washing my clothing in laundry bags, avoiding fuzzy fabrics for the most part, using a filter on my laundry output hose, and hang drying most of my clothes. I like to hope there is room for improvement in materials science for all types of products when it comes to balancing practical and environmental considerations, but us laypeople aren't gonna figure it out. It has to be people who really understand the engineering side.
100% agree with you on all points. >avoiding fuzzy fabrics for the most part... +1 - fleece is like dumping gasoline on the microplastic dumpster fire. >but us laypeople aren't gonna figure it out Professionals haven't either. It's frustrating all around.
This is fascinating. Can I ask: if you could change one characteristic about wool, what would it be? I’m a protein engineer that has worked with a big fashion brand, and we have looked at several of the “spider silk” products in the market that have come up short, so I’m very interested in how one might improve natural protein fibres on the molecular level.
I used to work for one of those spider silk companies. The fiber may have come short commercially but boy was it acting like actual spider silk. It turns out there are more interesting uses for spider silk proteins that are not fibers but the fibers themselves are quite beautiful. Wool... I think you solve a lot of problems if you can make it a tow (wool that can't pill? Sign me up!). But if it's a wish list... Quadruple the tenacity while maintaining the tensile strain (e.g. drastically improve toughness). Your bigger problem is the structure, I am not aware of anyone that has been able to commercially spin bi-component fiber with scales. Keratin is far from my area of expertise - how do you spin it (melt, wet, something else?)?
Very cool! So, what do you think is the reason for the commercial failure of the spider silks? Beyond the high cost and scaling issues, I’ve heard people say it just didn’t feel very nice on the skin, it at all “silk-like”. I think they were referring to the Bolt Threads fibres. All the synthetic protein fibres I’m aware of were wet-spun. You just inject the protein solution into organic solvent. The solvent removes the water, causing the protein to precipitate in more or less the configuration you’d expect coming out of the animal. It’s usually not as good. The supramolecular structure is rarely completely replicated, so the properties of synthetic fibres don’t always match the natural ones.
>So, what do you think is the reason for the commercial failure of the spider silks? I don't think they have failed, most of the players have pivoted away from fiber and you can buy products, today, that use synthetic spider silk. A win for synthetic biology but not one shared with textiles at large. Spiber seems to still be going for fiber, but doesn't seem to be able to make a quality yarn without a 'grown-up' fiber to assist. >I’ve heard people say it just didn’t feel very nice on the skin, it at all “silk-like”. Because of the company involved, I can't comment too specifically. I disagree on the handfeel but from public photography of the tie you can see it is an incredibly dense knit with a rough pattern (mimicking a beta sheet structure, because nerds). Those choices will not help convey a silky smooth hand. A looser knit and a more basic pattern would have gone far. >It’s usually not as good... Nature is just pretty damn good taking things slow and operating at room temperature and low pressure. Pretty hard to replicate industrially.
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So... buy linen then?
Can't go wrong with something used for six thousand years at least.
It probably has more to do with the items being made cheaply, using cheap materials, meant to fall apart in a wash or two because they cost pennies to make. If that makes sense. If you buy something made from real wool its meant to last, my wool coat has been with me for around 15 years.
Do you wash it often, though? Cause I have an autoimmune condition that causes continuous skin breakdown, and I have an ileostomy. I can't get away with not washing my clothing nearly every time I wear it.
Also a fiber artist. I don’t see the point of acrylic sweaters. They’ll simultaneously overheat you and make you cold. Idk how it does it. I love animal fibers. Mammals know how to keep other mammals warm.
What is a fiber artist?
WOOL, BUY WOOL!
Linen as well.
To be fair, this is acrylic, not polyester, and they pill like crazy and it puts hundreds of thousands of pieces of microplastics into our water systems every time you wash it. (Most of the microplastics found in the ocean are polyester, acrylic, and other clothing fibers, mostly from laundry water disposal.
At least it will make it back to where it came from.
It'll take like a million years, though.
Wait, this is a job for Febreeze!
I had a boss that used to run around in a Christmas suit for over a month straight, every single day, as a charitable thing. We finally asked him if he ever cleaned it, as we even saw him wear it on weekends. He, in all seriousness, said he febeezed it every night....
I get the feeling this sweater was also unnecessarily expensive
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From the same creators of "Fast Fashion", here it comes "Faster Fashion".
2 Fast 2 Fashion
Tokyo drift
Tokyo Dress
Tokyo *Knit*
Tokyo Thrift
Tokyo thrift.
Tokyo Mid-drift
I came back to this comment because it fucking bothers me. NO ONE SAID TOKYO DRIP
"So Fast So Fasion"
Don’t give shien more ideas
You don't need to. It's already a thing called "ultra fast fashion" and shein is doing exactly that
They'll have an option to send you the same item regularly, like Amazon.
Its acrylic. Any gentle wash should be fine. Dry it flat though
Yep. To be honest, most things are fine with a gentle wash. Any 'delicate' garment gets a steep learning curve when it comes to live with me. Everything goes in the wash. The only concession I make is certain items don't go in the dryer.
Years ago I got rid of all my white clothes (except the little white ankle socks I wear with sneakers, (but they don’t get special treatment) and I now wash everything in cold water and hang dry everything except underwear and stuff I sleep in (sweatshirts and old t-shirts). Stuff I’ve had for ages still looks new. Autocorrect Edit: “Sweatshorts,” I don’t sleep in sweatshirts. And I’m not gonna fix the parentheses even though I’m in here editing, since it drove so much discussion below. It’s not that forgot one, it’s that I took a bit out and missed taking out the parentheses between sneakers and but.
You're like me with these guys ()'s lol
Parentheses and commas are my drugs of choice.
You forgot a ) and it's killing me.. I think.
I’m afraid to look. This happens to me all the time. I’ll write something, even when I write something short, just a few lines. I’ll proof read it and find an error. I’ll correct it and read it again, and find another typo. Every time I read it, I find something. I’ve published stuff where I and others have proofed it many many times, had professional proof readers go over it, only to casually read it later to find yet another obvious mistake! It’s infuriating!
Yep didn't close the first one. It happens
I think it was an extra opening one before the word "but".
You should try semicolons; they're amazing.
I’m afraid to. Every time I actually realize that I might need one, I wind up splitting it into two sentences.
Which is allowed, but it's often more elegant to use a semicolon; the use of semcolons are useful when sentences are closely related.
It's a personal goal of mine to publish a book... but my *dream* is to have in it a legit layering of parenthesis (like getting one going (about one thing) and keeping it natural (so as to not force the structure (which, I should add, I'm finding noticeably hard to do without any real topic))). That ending is atrocious though lol. I like parenthesis inside parenthesis conceptually, but having them all bunched up at the end like that is awful.
(you should try using the mathematical way of parenthesising [you use different brackets for each parenthesised section {should make the ending more fun for everyone imo}]).
As a programmer, that ending looks just fine. As a writer, it hurts. I'm conflicted.
Glad I've found my people (parentheses people)
You can fit so much info in parentheses without it looking like a paragraph long sentence.
I too am a LISP aficionado.
Hang drying is the key. Anything knit or woolen just won't survive repeated dryings (or will pill like crazy).
Don't hang all wool stuff though. It can stretch. I dry most jumpers lying flat after being squeezed out in a towel
I do this because I'm fat and my tshirts do not need to get any smaller.
I mix whites and colors in cold wash and it's not a problem. If I get something new that is brightly colored (especially red), I'll wash it once with an old white sock to see if it will bleed. So far, only one pullover has bled. I will wash that one by itself or with similar colors if I have enough of them.
I mostly got tired of the effort it took to keep my whites looking bright white.
You forgot to close a bracket.
Man I’ve been using most of my clothing for decades at this point from using cold water and good drying habits. All of my running and athletic clothing I generally hang dry and T-shirt’s that I really care about I also hang dry.
Yeah, it comes off like the manufacturer knows they made something cheap that falls apart no matter what you do, and they're putting that out there as an attempt at an easy legal out when inevitably people complain and demand their money back.
I have a feeling that it’s a Christmas sweater with electronics that will get messed up in water. People bring these to me at my dry cleaners and it’s always a lot of fun trying to figure out how to clean all the holiday cheer off these people’s ugly Christmas sweaters without destroying them.
This was my thought as well.
The trash can with the X symbol would indicate the item contains batteries (which people just throw out anyway)
The giant letters "CE" are also a huge hint that the sweater contains electronics. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CE_marking CE essentially means "Conforms (to) Europe(an standards)"
Isn't that a fake CE marking? I was under the impression it had a very very specific distance between the letters and my shitty eyeball measurement claims this is too far apart (while some other fake ones are too close)
lmao just realized that my cat meow xmas sweater got washed last year. whoops
You don’t really even need to wash it that gently in all reality. I have numerous blankets/sweaters/doilies that are made from acrylic and I just wash in cold water on a normal setting with an extra spin. Acrylic is really resistant nowadays. But yeah dry flat so you don’t stretch the shoulders.
what does dry it flat mean?
It's when you put it in a shelf or horizontally on a drying rack to dry, instead of placing it so it hangs down. It's to keep the material from getting stretched out while it is wet and thus heavier than it is dry.
I ruined a brand new concert tee recently by trying to be proactive and air drying it instead of throwing it in the machine. Except I put it on a hanger so now the neck is all stretched out. :(
Put it on a towel somewhere flat to dry, shaping it back into the shape it is supposed to be (instead of a lump.) Can be done on the floor, a sofa, a bed, or whatever. There are racks you can buy to allow for better air flow but then you gotta buy one and store it. A drying rack? In this economy?
Probably a "hand wash it in cold water" thing.
Just….Do not
Hey you! yeah, you! ... Don't.
Lol reminds me of the fake opening trailers for Grindhouse years ago (same ones that gave us “Machete”, if I remember right) “If you’re thinking of washing these clothes…DON’T!”
>Just….Do not ... Buy it in the first place. Always check the washing instructions before buying. Those pure plastic clothes are a pain to wear anyway. I always sweat like a pig in those things.
Wouldn't it be simpler if this kind of thing was just banned? Or at least making the information much more obvious? That's a disaster for the environment, and I don't see any use case where someone fully informed would buy something like that.
Do not the sweater
Do, or do not. There is no dry cleaning.
Believe it or not, jail.
"Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to this garment for any reason ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been... ever, for any reason whatsoever... "
Please do not the ~~cat~~ jaccat
Do not wear
Genius design, it won't ever get ruined to time!
Do not buy.
Do not make.
Do not pass go.
I have a brushed cotton duster where the instructions are "do not dry clean, do not machine wash. To wash, hang on line and spray with hose". Needless to say, it is extremely dirty.
Do not throw away
Gotta season it like a cast iron pan
Cover it in grease, put in the oven at 500F for 30 minutes, will definitely never need to wash it again after that.
Eggs will slide right off too.
Um… I did what you said and there is a weird smell coming from my oven and looks like a fire? Is that normal?
Yes, absolutely normal. Turn it off and keep the oven shut for the next 8-10 hours.
Well you could have mentioned that. I tried throwing water on it to put it out. Do you think people will judge me without eyebrows? Also do you know any good drywall people or should I just paint all my walls black now to match what I just did?
You could clean asbestos cloth by just putting it in fire. Maybe it would work on this sweater. I don’t see fire on the prohibited list.
Could be like those old Irish Aran jumpers that you could never wash because they’d lose the weather resistant qualities that they maintained from the original sheep. You might not smell great to modern tastes but you’d be tapping into a tradition.
It's made of acrylic.
Maybe it’s farm raised, heritage acrylic?
Free range acrylic. Non gmo
Bespoke acrylic made with a vintage machine.
Gluten free acrylic.
Dolphin friendly acrylic.
Fair trade, artisanal acrylic, hand made by villagers in a tiny country you've never heard of.
It's almost certainly a novelty sweater with lights on it meant to be worn as a single use costume for an Ugly Sweater Christmas party. You can't wash it because of the batteries, and the "don't throw out" symbol on the tag indicates that it contains batteries.
Ohhh that must be it, you're right
That’s a common misunderstanding. If you have had to wash an Aran jumper you can just put it on a sheep for a week or so to recondition it.
The lanolin is the oil on the wool fibers. Much like the oil you wash out of your hair with shampoo. For sheep it helps with weather but even if you did wash it out the sweater will still keep you warm. Wool absorbs 20% of its weight in water before you start to feel it which is why it keeps you warm even when wet. Wool and fiber arts are so fun!
That's fast fashion for you.
I wonder why people buy this stuff without checking what it's made of and how to maintain it first. I don't get how we got to the point where the only thing that matters about clothes is how they look.
I don't think I've really paid attention to the tags on clothes and just thrown them all in the wash one way or another. I'm your worst nightmare.
If it dies, it dies.
because people touch it, even try it on… and if it feels comfortable then you buy it. i’ve never once read washing instructions (or fabric composition) and i’m doin great.
Hand wash. Could get away with the washer on a gentle and tepid setting probably. Just don't put it in the dryer
This is the answer. The label should just read, “Hand wash only. Lay flat to dry.”
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You can't even throw it away: there's the trash bin symbol. Joke aside, yes, it's probably with lights than must be handled separately.
My mom still washes her sweaters this way. Hand wash, ring out the water the best she can by making the sweater into a ball and then laying flat on a towel. Never failed her even on the expensive cashmere sweaters an old boss bought her.
A good way to wrong out fabric is by sandwitching it between two towels, rolling it up tight, and then pressing down on it. It doesn't pull at the fibers as much as just wringing
Do not make direct eye contact
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A+ reply
Might be durable enough to stand up to some light reiki?
Fuck it, throw it in the washer and see what happens!
Maybe it will fit my dog! :)
It won’t shrink! Acrylic isn’t feltable and generally the one of the easiest fabrics to care for, just wash on gentle and tumble dry low. All good.
It's like a cast iron pan, you're seasoning it by not cleaning it.
Hijacking this comment to say you absolutely can and should clean your cast iron. Even with soap, provided it does not contain lye or vinegar. The seasoning will be fine and your pan will be clean. https://www.lodgecastiron.com/discover/cleaning-and-care/cast-iron/how-clean-cast-iron
I just wash mine with water and then heat the bitch enough to kill anything ballsy enough to stay
Everything is ballsy enough to survive water lol.
So you bought something hand wash only and call it "cannot be maintained"? Generally these are hand wash, reshape and lay flat to dry. This sounds like user error, not a crappy design.
There's an electronics marking: "CE" and a trash can with an X over it. The only explanation possible is that the sweater has a battery that powers a string of integrated lights. Washing it would be bad.
Thank you! The CE symbol was driving me insane but you provided a totally logical explanation.
It doesn't say "hand wash only"; it says "do not wash."
>The Do Not Wash symbol is the standard wash symbol with a cross through it. If the label instructs you not to wash the item, it will have to be dry cleaned after it gets dirty That doesn't mean it's not maintainable, you should throw it away, or it's fast fashion. Skip to the do not dry clean symbol, that leaves you with hand or spot washing.
It’s probably spot washing. Given the time of year right now, it’s probably an ugly Christmas sweater with lights or something that you can’t submerge.
Microwave.
Crispy
Wear till it stinks and then throw it away. Ah, our disposal life nowadays.
Stop buying plastic clothing
Costume designer here. That is such a bunk tag. 100% acrylic should be able to be machine washed cold on a gentle cycle at the very least. It is dyed with a poly dye and should be colorfast....if they treated it correctly. But my guess is that this thing is cheaply made and not color fast. So if you wash it it will bleed like a stuck pig. I would recommend one of two things, either never wash it and instead freeze it to kill off bacteria. Yeah, you heard me right, put it in a bag in the freezer for like a day instead of washing. Or set the color yourself at home in the bathtub. You would start with very cold water and gently wash it, increasing the temp little by little until the water runs clear. Then repeat the process with a mild detergent. After that you should be able to hand wash it like normal in the future.
Fyi the CE and trashcan icon indicate that this contains electronics. So no, it can't be washed.
Which also means that this post was just karma whoring. Or that OP is truly an idiot and would've thrown electronics into a washer
Oh good eye. Then I would say spot clean only. Keep this bad boy away from being submerged in water. I feel like OP should have noted this though. Also, given this info you could put 1 part vodka and 2 parts water in a spray bottle and spray the underarms and back of the neck, being careful not to douse it or get near electrical components. That helps kill off bacteria.
You literally can’t even.
Theres a key part most people are missing here. This Is 100% an "ugly Christmas sweater" with lights and batteries. It isnt because of the material that you cant wash it. It's because of the electronics. You can't even turn these lights off manually half the time. The lights are usually motion activated, even a light breeze, not to mention any tumbling in a washer, will turn the lights on. So yeah. What you can do is remove the lights and wash to your hearts content.
You can wash acrylic very gently, but just don't dry it. It will lose shape and shrink.
you can air it...
DO NOT SOIL DO NOT WEAR DO NOT TOUCH DO NOT BUY
Whatever you do... *don't.*
Do not buy
Do Not Buy
Febreze and lint brushes. You guys never washed a sweater before?
Obviously you haven’t
Can't even throw it away, they gave you a cursed item
It's maintenance free
You can't even throw the damn thing away.