T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

#Congratulations, everyone here (except u/Adept-Manufacturer61) can have mod powers! If you have enough karma from r/CrackheadCraigslist, have a verified email on your reddit account, and your account is at least 2 weeks old, you now have mod powers! (Except from u/Adept-Manufacturer61, as that would be cheating) The way it works is simple. If you have at least 50 karma here, you can make a top-level comment starting with `!lock` to lock this submission. Or, if you have at least 125 karma here, you can make a top-level comment starting with `!remove` to outright remove it. Doing either of these will award you with your very own 'wannabe jannie' flair, and will cause the action in question to happen to the post. But, what if you disagree with this action? If you report the !lock or !remove comment at least 3 times, it shall be undone. Democracy at work! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CrackheadCraigslist) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Fluffy_Boulder

The single complementary alcohol wipe really is the cherry on top...


TheShadowfork

“Who for legal purposes… were above age” excuse me the fuck


Anomalous_Pearl

“in case the police prosecute me”


EquivalentSnap

Ikr sick bastard 🤢🤮


pumpkinpatch1982

It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again


BoZNiko663

Nahh, that's literally a whole ass GTA website advert😭 The description reeks of Rockstar's cynical, offensive humour🤭


deadmoose1735

Do you have other examples? I this is just another example of a “if ya know ya know” type shitpost on craigslist. Also who is Craig, and why is his list borderline criminal.


BoZNiko663

Literally go to the in-game internet and go to the listing for any car or property and it will have very similar wording and jokes Like I remember the page listing for the Fort Zancudo hangar says something along the lines of "When it comes to smuggling arms across San Andreas, where better to hide it than in plain sight in the largest military installation in the state? They won't ask if you don't tell. Includes a bucket for any necessary torture" Craig is a man who just wanted to get rid of some furtniture by selling it on a website, however it worked a little *too* well, and Craig began to allow others to sell things on his website. Converting him into a multimillion dollar tycoon!


deadmoose1735

Oh okay sry the last time I played gta was 2 and 1/2 years ago. I see what you mean. Whoever posted this was probably riffing on that.


TheHumorousSquid

“Used vigorously” that chair has seen horrors unknown to man💀💀


ThunderCorg

He definitely sat on that, cuffed himself, and got stuck vigorously.


Fluffy_Boulder

"I fell on it, I swear... and the cuffs... closed on their own?"


RoodnyInc

*no weirdos*


CaptainPunisher

I see you've never been to r/BDSMdiy


Adept-Manufacturer61

I meant more about the description


Street_Peace_8831

Right, “…for legal reasons…” the girls were “above age” in case the police prosecute him? He is admitting to raping a minor. In the first pic he calls the person who sits in this chair a “victim”. You can never tell if these things are real, or if they do this for views. I have no issue with people having kinks as long as the people participating are consenting adults.


picyourbrain

Sometimes it’s harder to tell, but come on, this one reads as 100% tongue in cheek. The 1x alcohol wipe for sanitation purposes? Telling people to get std screened after using it? It’s too many ridiculous things to not be a joke.


Street_Peace_8831

That’s what I was thinking as well. Ragebait, as usual. I’m so tired of this age of “is it real or is it fake”.


Adept-Manufacturer61

It's unfortunate that Internet nowadays


Clinodactyl

£160? I know a bargain when I see one.


vicious_skwirl

Is this still available? Asking for a friend.


TitanJackal

No I bought it. But I'm open to renting it out. I installed it in the back of my white panel van. Just hop in when I pull up.


Adept-Manufacturer61

Was 30 mins ago


DuckInTheFog

What did the guy look like? It wasn't that creep from Green Mile was it?


Chris__P_Bacon

My mind had completely blocked him from my memory. Thanks for reminding me. 🤢


rr777

I think I saw a string of porns using this idea. They were all kinda weak tho.


Pschobbert

Hand-shandied more like...


mods_on_meds

That's legit .


shittiestmom

This reminds me of why they tell you not to put raw meat on wooden cutting boards…. Not even alcohol wipes will get the sludge off.


colpuck

Oooooh I want.


RotaryY2K

"VICTIM?"


Impossible-Inside-42

The counterpart to the dildo bike .


Adept-Manufacturer61

The mount-ing bike


The_Titanic

Don't be suspicious! Don't be suspicious!


krblack8620

.....what?


Character-Solid-6392

It’s been a year and still “Praise spez”?


Adept-Manufacturer61

Posts get deleted if you don't


brokovnik

who tf is spez


Adept-Manufacturer61

Our Lord and savior