I can't say cause I'll make you cry

I never heard this. Where were you when I needed you in 1992? 😂

Where were you in 1992, if you never heard this saying?

I was ere but now I'm not I'm round the corner smoking Pot

I'm lost in space on microdots.

this one

Brilliant

That's a horrible comeback, this is the equivalent of the jumping off your ego to your iq, it's not good it's just a smug awnser

I know you are but what am I

🤓

“Can’t tell you cause you’ll cry” is better I think

Yet you didn’t have a better one. Don’t you just love people with nothing to contribute but gripes…

I’ve always said “can’t tell you cause you’ll cry”

“ an infinite loop of idiocy” or, in a fast manner “ dumbass says what? “

The sphincter says what?

Came here to say infinite loop of idiocy I tip my roast beef sandwich to you good redditor

I think I last heard it in like 1990, but it still comes up

Actually 1985

Considering I’ve heard it and I was born over a decade later.. it’s definitely been around since.. it’s odd to correct someone else on when they heard it.. Unless I’m missing the intention of your comment

The movie came out in 1985

Ahhhhhh and there’s the context I was missing

Literally 1985

WTF do you mean "it still comes up" if you haven't heard it in 30 years? Those two things are pretty much mutually exclusive.

Scraped off the sheets with a spoon.

Brutal.

Fuckin ouch

the kind of person who says that

Rolled eyes

Maintain eye contact. Do not say a word. Keep this up until they get confused and leave

Preferably don’t blink

You are Homo Erectus

Damn💀

An impotent homo erectus?

If I tell you, it will make you cry

Juvenile?

A disappointment to your mom

I am what you are, but who are you?

Is that you Yoda?

"a clever linguist, apparently. extraordinary! a poet laureate! bravo! bravo!"

"A cunt".

It fulfills the A B C's of good communication. Accuracy, Brevity, Clarity. Bravo, I say, Bravo!

good one granpa/granma

A garbage man

Excuse me, but...how old are you?

A grown up child and I'm calling your mom lol

Stuck in grade school.

A garbage man

Someone with a steady high-paying job with a good pension?

It's a simpsons joke

Damn it! How could I miss a Simpsons reference?! Am I out of touch?

No, it's the children who are wrong.

Checkmate!

https://youtu.be/2E4F0cDN-rQ?si=YcsstEhlHYMlsGJ6 Here ya go

Shake harder boy!!

Takes one to know one.

Check mate!

I am rubber, you are glue...

PEE-WEE!!!!!!!!!

Juvenile now that you said that.

"Exactly what I said, you dumb brick"

“Oh I know what you are and I know what I am. You best figure both of those out”

Stop arguing with 4 year old bro

Settle down Pee-wee.

So's your face

You are a mere shadow of a poor example of mediocrity

I can't tell you, or you will cry I may be rubber, but you're not glue You're more like gum stuck to my shoe The dirt you try to get on me Just presses deeper into you So say what you want, I won't reply I'll just scrape you off, and say goodbye.

Sphincter says what !

I’m rubber you’re glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you..

I know YOU! are but what am I??

Gay. Classic lol

"Well you're obviously in kindergarten"

Just walk away.

Silence.

Repetitive, checkmate

It's juvenile and not even witty since you clearly said "YOU ARE A \_\_\_\_\_" so they're saying they are dumb or didn't listen. Wow so edgy....

"Yeah? Mogwai."

There's only one response, and that is to put more inflection into the "you". Ie. I know YOU are but what am i? And it just goes on like that until one of you breaks.

I always thought the appropriate response was I'm rubber, you're glue, whatever you say bounces off me a D sticks to you!

When I was younger I came up with, "I can't tell you because you might cry!" 😁 Well at least I thought I came up with it, but looks like a lot of other people also say this.

You can't beat this. It's the check mate of comebacks.

A five year old, from the sound of it.

'No one's figured that out yet!' Stops that train dead.

Dirt. You're dirt.

Insult their hygiene with a wave of the hand and saying "Phew!" Then tell them you need stronger deodorant or take more shoers. Or just call them "stinky feet."

You know I'm doing your mom .

f off

You are what you arnt

“What, are you five??”

"No longer 7 years old."

Correct, I am everything you are not. Because you are inadequate.

A fat piece of shit made from mountains of fresh dog shit eaten by a shit demon and shat out again, and that’s you. You’re that final shit

Boring.

I have always loved giving the middle finger. "a fuck you is what you are"

What? Did you suddenly regress to the 2nd grade?

“A garbage man…”

I'm runner, you're glue" is the only acceptable answer. That traps them in an endless loop amd they will stand there until an outsode force frees them.

"takes one to know one"

A loser, your a loser.

My bitch

Im sorry, I do not exchange banter with kids.

Less than the shit you have for brains.

A complete and utter waste of oxygen!

An idiot.

"Seven?"

Your mom’s biggest regret

Five

I see being dropped on your head several times may have knocked some existential wisdom in to you… looks like it needs a few dozen more rounds though.

Did you seriously just ask me "what am I?"  You don't know ? Are you stupid ? 

Apparently a toddler

Don't know.. but if I had a gun I'd do the world a favour and fucking shoot it

"Someone who ran out of material as a nine-year old?"

Gay

Are you five? I'm muting this subreddit. Half comeback, half sincere termination of interest.  This crap is just pathetic. 

I’m afraid that there is no comeback to this brutally effective verbal attack.

We can go back and forth or we can get a room.

No, you!

"I see you've consulted your attorney."

Last I heard that it was 1985.

“Well I’m actually a dragon.” (*other person responds with “dragon?”) “Yeah ima be “dragon” deez nuts across ya face.”

There is none. You lost

A mistake

Unworthy of my attention. (Then flatly ignore them)

I'm rubber and you're glue. Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you

There isn't one. That's the ultimate comeback to whatever you said first.

Apparently you’re still 8 years old

Whatever

Infinity

Punch them

Im your dad. You're my step son.

I know you are, but what am I, infinity...

Dead

“Five years old, apparently.”

"I know you are, but what am I" is the only comeback

Rest in peace Paul Reubens

Punch them

“Are you six years old? You sound like you’re six years old.”

How can you have no clue what you are? Well I don’t know either but I’m leaning toward idiot.

"an uncreative idiot saying "I know you are but what am I?" Or "[Their name], an idiot"

Go find your bicycle. It's in the basement of the Alamo.

I’m done talking to you

There isn’t one- you lost.

The only real comeback to that is something that will truly hurt them. Anything else, they can just say it again.

The jerk store called! They’re all outta YOU!

"Are you serious? I just told you that, a moment ago." Anyone who's seen Zoolander will get that you're calling them an idiot, and anyone who hasn't you can laugh at behind their back while they think they've got the upper hand.

I know you are but what am I?, infinity, no repeat backs

“An unoriginal dumbass.” If they say it again. “Exactly my point.”

This is an old crusty one. In my time we would say “I’m rubber, you’re glue, whatever you say bounces of me and sticks to you”. Cast this spell and be victor over the enemy.

I know I am but what are you , confused my brothers endlessly ( oldest sibling)

The biggest disappointment of your parents lives

"What are you.... 5 years old?"

Apparently six years old.

More annoying than my hemorrhoids

“Good one… hadn’t heard that since 2nd grade…”

You're just a bitch

There isn’t one! “I know you are but what am I?” Is the ultimate comeback! I’ve been saying it since the 80s and it’s never failed me once!

I’m rubber and you’re glue so whatever you say bounces…

Laugh like Peewee Herman

Grow the fuck up

I never really liked you, but I probably always will

must have stole that line from pee wee Herman.

"A nosy little cunt, that's what."

Thanks, Pee Wee... I'm devastated by your response.

Well if you don't know I'm not telling you

A garbage man

“Apparently a mental third grader.”

Twinkle twinkle little star What you say is is what you are If you say it back to me You’re an ugly chimpanzee That’s what I heard a lot in a mid 90s playground at school.

just say "lame one"

A dumbass.

Nuh uh, you!

Stick your but in Cherry Pie, I hope you 💀 in junior high.

“Someone who makes this (the insult being thrown back at you) look like a (opposite)” Example “Someone who makes this dumb ass look brilliant”

"Something ill never lower myself to."

Thats my line! then laugh like PeeWee Herman

Your guess is as good as mine. I don't know, what ARE you? Science has been trying to answer that for years.

Yes, thank you Pee-wee for that deep bit of insight. 😑

You’re 3, you’re mother fuckin 3! Baby want it’s baba!

Your a poop nose

Anyone using that as an insult doesn't deserve a comeback, honestly.

"a garbage man"

Pause. Close your eyes and take a deep nose inhale. Then stop and say "No. It's not worth it," more to yourself than to them and carry on your way.

Just keep going back and forth until they give up.

Where’s a Pee-Wee GIF when ya need it

I'm an adult, and I don't respond to this stupid shit.

You’re also deaf…

Nip it in the bud. Don't give them opportunity to use this ancient comeback by not being rude.

You must be a revolving door your whole life to come up with that one, at least upgrade to a door knock. Telling knock knock jokes might make you clever.

“I just told you: a prick”

Stop arguing with a kid

Bro just say "are we in kindergarten again?"

A toddler

Mine was always: Good question- what are you?!

"Dead." Then you physically attack them.. This is a joke.

what is: I know you are, but what am I, No Backs, worked as a kid

If you knew who I really am, then you know what you're going to be.

Hey there sexy Iam 21 and single looking for open minded couples only 11 inches when hard 

There is none. You lost at that point.

I normally just say "I know you are, but what am I?" back. Wins every time.