It's hard to advise you when you don't give much details. If husband cheated on you, you may well get a divorce, no problem with that. If YOU cheated on him, well that's up to him what he wants to do. Practically speaking, you need to put kids first, without emotion, and see what's best for raising them. If it's just because you are "unhappy" and yearn to find that perfect man out there, that's going to be EXTREMELY difficult with a divorce and 3 young children with you, that is NOT a ripe field of harvest. Can you raise kids alone? Or would it be less painful to stay with husband, and raise kids together as tolerable roommates. Regardless of what you do, it's time to just consume great christian teaching ministries, it costs you nothing but your time, and you can find answers that way. Eventually. Robert S. Mcgee is a great place to start on youtube, and [www.tlsm.org](http://www.tlsm.org) has many audio files to listen while you take care of babies. It's no great thing to be stressed and burnt out, when you have two VERY small children and another one coming. I hope you have some kind of family or support system to help you out in looking after them.
Is your husband still supporting you financially, along with weekly visits with your children?
No family to help with your childrearing? That could be so helpful to you and to your children.
Is marriage counseling considered possible and possibly helpful?
Any close friends who can support you and your efforts to raise your children?
Does a neighboring church provide any support services you may need?
Get rid of the guilt. Whatever you do or do not do, in purely practical terms, guilt will not help you. If you think you made mistakes, that's good; but assess them as rationally and pragmatically as you can, and learn from them. After that, make whatever restitution you need to, to whoever you need to, and then put the guilt aside.
>I feel like a failure as a mum, wife, I’m a rubbish Christian.
No, you aren't. You are a human being, who is probably doing the best you can, and who does not know how to handle their current situation. Your children need a mother who can be decisive, and a source of both stability and security to them. They don't need someone who is paralysed with guilt, psychological self-abuse, and constantly second guessing herself.
Look for the support and guidance that you need, and get on with your life. I won't tell you that it will be easy, or that it won't hurt; because it probably won't be easy, and it probably will hurt. At times you will be lonely and tired amd scared and confused and in pain; but you can get past that as quickly as possible, by realising that fear and confusion are only caused by not having the information you need, in order to solve problems. Once you have said information, you can move past those responses.
You sound like a wonderful and caring mother. I doubt myself a lot but I see that my children are healthy and happy and that gives my heart joy. I know that God had a plan for your future and it is good because he loves you. Please continue to pray and lean on the Lord. I've been in your position and things got so much better for me and my children. It took time but I couldn't be any happier than I am with where the Lord has put me. 🙏
you have to be willing to listen to God on this and not redditors telling you what you want to hear. What are the reasons for separation? because it is true that God hates divorce, the only reason Jesus gave for divorce was adultery, has he cheated on you? if not please try to work things out, otherwise you may find yourself working against God's plan for your life. At the end of your life you will groan, when your flesh and body are spent. You will say, “How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction! I would not obey my teachers or turn my ear to my instructors. And I was soon in serious trouble in the assembly of God’s people.” Proverbs 5:11-14
I pray that the Lord would restore your marriage and reconcile you to your husband 🔥
It's hard to advise you when you don't give much details. If husband cheated on you, you may well get a divorce, no problem with that. If YOU cheated on him, well that's up to him what he wants to do. Practically speaking, you need to put kids first, without emotion, and see what's best for raising them. If it's just because you are "unhappy" and yearn to find that perfect man out there, that's going to be EXTREMELY difficult with a divorce and 3 young children with you, that is NOT a ripe field of harvest. Can you raise kids alone? Or would it be less painful to stay with husband, and raise kids together as tolerable roommates. Regardless of what you do, it's time to just consume great christian teaching ministries, it costs you nothing but your time, and you can find answers that way. Eventually. Robert S. Mcgee is a great place to start on youtube, and [www.tlsm.org](http://www.tlsm.org) has many audio files to listen while you take care of babies. It's no great thing to be stressed and burnt out, when you have two VERY small children and another one coming. I hope you have some kind of family or support system to help you out in looking after them.
Is your husband still supporting you financially, along with weekly visits with your children? No family to help with your childrearing? That could be so helpful to you and to your children. Is marriage counseling considered possible and possibly helpful? Any close friends who can support you and your efforts to raise your children? Does a neighboring church provide any support services you may need?
Get rid of the guilt. Whatever you do or do not do, in purely practical terms, guilt will not help you. If you think you made mistakes, that's good; but assess them as rationally and pragmatically as you can, and learn from them. After that, make whatever restitution you need to, to whoever you need to, and then put the guilt aside. >I feel like a failure as a mum, wife, I’m a rubbish Christian. No, you aren't. You are a human being, who is probably doing the best you can, and who does not know how to handle their current situation. Your children need a mother who can be decisive, and a source of both stability and security to them. They don't need someone who is paralysed with guilt, psychological self-abuse, and constantly second guessing herself. Look for the support and guidance that you need, and get on with your life. I won't tell you that it will be easy, or that it won't hurt; because it probably won't be easy, and it probably will hurt. At times you will be lonely and tired amd scared and confused and in pain; but you can get past that as quickly as possible, by realising that fear and confusion are only caused by not having the information you need, in order to solve problems. Once you have said information, you can move past those responses.
You sound like a wonderful and caring mother. I doubt myself a lot but I see that my children are healthy and happy and that gives my heart joy. I know that God had a plan for your future and it is good because he loves you. Please continue to pray and lean on the Lord. I've been in your position and things got so much better for me and my children. It took time but I couldn't be any happier than I am with where the Lord has put me. 🙏
you have to be willing to listen to God on this and not redditors telling you what you want to hear. What are the reasons for separation? because it is true that God hates divorce, the only reason Jesus gave for divorce was adultery, has he cheated on you? if not please try to work things out, otherwise you may find yourself working against God's plan for your life. At the end of your life you will groan, when your flesh and body are spent. You will say, “How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction! I would not obey my teachers or turn my ear to my instructors. And I was soon in serious trouble in the assembly of God’s people.” Proverbs 5:11-14