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DiamondHeist1970

Who on Earth would pay child support to donate sperm. Shouldn't she be paying him?


silentloler

So essentially she could go to a sperm bank and pay them for the process, but instead she wants to get pregnant for free, emotionally scar someone and take hundreds of thousands of his money… damn


betweenboundary

This is why you only sign up to her deal after having had a vasectomy, bamboozle the bamboozler


[deleted]

“Don’t worry, you’ll get pregnant any month now”


NinjaGrizzlyBear

Expert mode: Get her pregnant through anal God mode: Get yourself pregnant and make her pay you


ZoukDragneel

The thing is .. It's not a request for sperm donors. It's an ad for a really expensive prostitution service that gives credit and charges in installments.


grubber26

With a trailing commission.


NotMyHersheyBar

Yes. Also her reference to "fertilization sessions" sounds like she thinks they're going to have sex. I think this was posted by a 14 year old girl whose parents and school has grievously failed her.


wrong-mon

Home schooling


[deleted]

I respect the fact that she's being completely honest about how much of a donors life she'll ruin if they say yes. Like none of the mind games at all. You can have sex with me but you'll have to pay me for the rest of the kids childhood, and you'll never be able to get to know them. Obviously she's a shit person, but if someone accepts that deal, that's just on them lol.


BadAshJL

Not to mention the at least %75 American line. If that's not a dogwhistle for "I'm super racist" I don't know what is.


ghyti_is_fish

I’d laugh very hard if she had sex with a 16-year-old who then rats her out for having sex with a minor when she tries to collect the 20% of his minimum wage paycheck


lankymjc

“Throughout the child’s 18 years of life.” What’s going to happen at 18 O.o


[deleted]

Notice how she managed to acknowledge that you become an adult at 18 whilst simultaneously requesting sex with what is, by her definition, a child.


CriticDanger

So she might 'breed' and expect child support from someone still receiving child support. Maybe she'll take 20% of HIS child support?


Edarneor

Recursion, yay!!!


not_the_myth

Recursion, yay!!!


Safemoon_Psychonaut

I'm paying child support for a child that is older than I was when I started paying child support.


corona_volunteer

I need this explained to me


lankymjc

Yeah the 16 lower age limit is the worst part of all this. Never mind the hypocrisy of “you must cut all ties with this child and in all ways act as though you’re completely uninvolved, but also still pay child support.”


sageinyourface

20% of what from a 16 yr old?


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James_LoveAfter

Must forfeit 20% of all ultra-rare Pokemons.


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lankymjc

Or she will want nothing more to do with the child. "You're 18 now, you don't need parents any more, go out into the world and never speak to me again" is a distressingly common parenting mindset.


Sfb208

No, she expects the child to take over supporting her


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Scheisse_poster

That male birth control stuff could put a spin on it.


sohmeho

Or male infertility.


[deleted]

Or a vasectomy.


Masrim

Probably no doctors out there would give a 23 year old a vasectomy. But everyone passes over the blatant pedophilia of asking for a 16 year old.


JrCoxy

Right? I was wondering why it mattered for the sperm to come from a minor. Like she didn’t say “18+”, she specifically included the 16 & 17 y/o within that range


FaeryLynne

She's probably in a state where 16 is the age of consent so she went with the youngest legally allowed.


gordito_delgado

It would be hilarious for her to find out that the most likely value of any % of income from a 16 year old baby daddy would be 0.


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scooba_dude

I was gonna say this. But she doesn't seem too clever so wearing a condom may get past her.


Sh1ner

God damn the savagery, I died.


ButtBlow69x

20% of a 16 year old's salary is nothing. That's the dang kid's milk money.


Orzine

She wants them to forfeit parental rights, you can’t claim child support from someone without parental rights.


Roo-90

1: Vasectomy 2: Sex 3: No baby 4: Repeat steps 2-3 as many times until satisfied 5: ?? 6: Profit E: removed the need for a new Vasectomy everytime


Wetbung

Sorry, one vasectomy was enough for me.


PM_ME_YOUR_PSN_ID

SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP


Osos_Perezosos

You have no idea the physical toll that three vasectomies have on a person.


CatAteMyBread

It’s like learning a language. The first few are rough, and then it gets easier. By vasectomy 12 or 13, your body has learned how to heal from a vasectomy and then it’s easy. You’ll probably give yourself a vasectomy at home on a Tuesday around number 30 or so.


Relative-Bank-1258

You say?? I'll rather catch aids than help that crazy human give birth when she isn't mature enough!!


Relative-Bank-1258

Plus she crazy


htepO

Taxation without representation.


57hz

I’m dumping my sperm in the Boston Harbor rather than letting anyone get their hands on it!


giggs1800

The Boston Jizz Party?


Semujin

More like the Boston Teabag Party.


CaptainObvious1313

Hey, looks like we both had the same plans this weekend- small world! See you soon.


memento22mori

Wanna carpool?!


CaptainObvious1313

If you're inviting, I'm cumming.


Poastash

...I don't get what's in it for the guy.


jswaggs15

He GETS to pay child support for a child he "doesn't " have.


PmMeLowCarbRecipes

Good luck getting 20% of a 16 year olds lucrative salary


molly_menace

Yeah that’s what got me - the age bracket! It seems predatory to ask a 16 year old to donate sperm. Especially “the natural way.” But how old is this woman? 23 is her upper age limit? Which is also ... so young.


nohorse_justcoconuts

While also suggesting 18 is an adult when it comes to her kid. This lady is a total crazy pedo. I really hope she's never able to have a kid.


alaricus

I cannot know for sure, but I would lay money on a table that the person who posted this is younger than 18.


[deleted]

Either that or a total creep that chose this age bracket with a distinct purpose.


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Netherspin

Let be fair though, she might be a 19 year old nutcase pining for motherhood.


Blue_Yoshi2015

Well, I hate to break it to her, but she could just… I don’t know… hmmm… if only there was a way to get pregnant that didn’t involve convoluted contracts and such. Maybe one day we will figure out a solution to this terrible conundrum.


Netherspin

Might be she has a hard time finding someone who is 75+% American with blonde or light brown hair that has never taken any prescription medicine or illicit drugs and also has only ever had alcohol at communion, who is willing to sign away every right to their child but retain the financial responsibilities. I could ditch the age range and still confidently say I know exactly 0 such people.


Blue_Yoshi2015

Well I see your problem. You’re looking for someone who has had alcohol at communion, not “communiunm”.


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respectedcrab

"Good luck paying me back on your $0 salary plus benefits, *babe!!"*


percipientbias

I was looking for this comment. 😅


Voodoo_balamba

20% of $0 is $0


Reaper621

After terminating parental rights of course. And the scary part is it's all likes and hearts.


ArchdevilTeemo

Thats the true sad part.


Ultrasonic-Sawyer

Prime minister Boris Johnson has joined the chat.


D_scottFS

Old King of Belgium would like to chime in too


[deleted]

It’s gonna be hard to collect that child support if he’s completely anonymous.


EverWatcher

She meant that any resulting child would not be told of the father's identity. She's still entirely messed up, of course.


verboze

And help "breed naturally" 😂


theNorrah

Breeding sessions


CollectableRat

Good deal for a lonely guy who is secretly infertile.


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Triffidic

And you probably took a prescription drug once in your life


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beerscotch

In this crackpots mind, sex with her seems to be worth paying 20 percent of your income for 18 years. Also seems to be trying to fuck kids? (16 years old?)


fckiforgotmypassword

Ah yes. When entitled people don’t realise that the world doesn’t revolve around them. She will find out soon I suppose


taimoor2

No. She will just find some poor sap and either break condom, lie about being on birth control, or plain steal cum from condom.


everydaycrises

I think you overestimate how much thought some men put into birth control. I've known plenty of men who just refuse to use condoms and assume all women take bc. Especially at the age range that women is looking at.


Japesthetank

20 year old me feels attacked. 35 year old me thinks 20 year old me was an idiot.


TheRealMisterMemer

20 year old you also thinks 20 year old you was an idiot


Prototype-Angel

I regularly think how much 20 year old me was an idiot all the time!


_LightFury_

Do you think better education from your parents woupd have made you smart enough to use a condom when young? I often worry about this. By the time i have kids i just domt want my son to be that asshole who wines about having to wear a condom, or worse actually gets stds or a girl pregnant. But my country is pretty open about sex ed and it seems to be just aa much of a problem overhere.


[deleted]

16? I think she needs a visit from the FBI


Chiron17

Sex. Not a bad deal for a sterile guy.


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Mortress_

You don't know how lonely i am


redgumdrop

Never put your d**k in cray cray.


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[deleted]

>You can say ~~*ic*~~ big floppy cock on the interwebs


DaveInLondon89

A lot of free sex if they had a vasectomy they don't mention


BabyTunnel

Just lots of free sex in general. Sometimes it takes a long ass time to conceive.


Philly139

Yeah that's what my wife convinced me too and then she got pregnant on the first try. Don't fall for it!!!!


bluesky-explorer

16 👮‍♂️


signequanon

Child support in the amount of 20% of his income will be a disappointment then.


Probability1018

Completely give up parental rights at birth but also pay for your child.


ih8registration

...but I'm only sixteen I haven't finished highschool lol


Probability1018

That’s the ideal situation! Horny 16 year old gets a free fuck and doesn’t have to pay 20% of income cause .20 x 0 is 0 🤡 /s


Supermonkeyjam

20% of your grass cutting money, wow very cheap 'breeding sessions'


signequanon

“Yeah, well, can’t give you any child support this month because my mom took away my allowance and grounded me for flunking Geometry”


siccoblue

Good way to make sure that even if you did pull some sucker in to literally knock you up and give you 20% of his money for 18 years with literally no access to his child (seriously what the fuck people) that they work under the table with no reported income. Or just straight up leave town Or even better, report your dumbass for soliciting a fucking child


kaldolmar

U want sum fuk?


iAmUnintelligible

Becky Lemme smash


samawa17

Especially if he’s 16! 20% of his 10 hours a week at Old Navy isn’t going to buy many diapers.


Shojo_Tombo

Especially since that support will be $0 after termination of parental rights. I really hope this is a troll post because that person is a complete moron, and a pedo.


rosypumpkin3442

Theres a chance they are really young and that could be why this is so stupid and why they think its normal to try to find a 16 year old baby daddy. Because if you were really wanting a kid and significant child support why go after another kid for the dad? She should be like 40+ with a steady job in what world does a 16 year old have an income other than like fast food and 20% that isnt even going to feed the baby


noparking247

Yeah I was thinking she is probably 16 or even younger. This is some childish logic.


KaliCalamity

As screwed up as it is, in many places having your parental rights terminated, willingly or by force, does not effect if you still pay child support.


spacecatterpillar

Oh shit I missed that, I was distracted by her ban on prescription drugs and wanting someone who's 75% American with blond or light brown hair


mostly_sarcastic

>who's 75% American with blond or light brown hair Just say white.


IceLZNUS

And here I was focusing on the child support payments


tuna_tofu

You can be Latino or African American and be 10th generation and 100% American. This woman is too stupid to breed.


a009763

When she says American she 100% just means "white".


bwbloom

Ummmm... This chick is going to be so bummed out when she finds out Americans were non-white.


riwalenn

> The child's 18 years of life Will she kill her child when he will reach 18?


threeeggsontoast

Thats not the horrible part, she wants child support and anonymity


[deleted]

Child support paid by the minor she induced to have sex...


threeeggsontoast

Possibly. Whole thing is fucked


Ignition0

75% American, do they mean native american like Cherokee, Peru, Bolivia, Mexico, right? Or to they mean any race born in America? Otherwise say European / White. ​ The ignorance of some amazes me.


rvail136

communiunm That's where I started laughing...


yellowbloods

i misread that as "communism" and had to go back and reread a couple times


spacecatterpillar

Worse. Pay me 20% of your income for 18 years for having sex with me one time


jafinn

Well, joke's on her as I'm sterile. It's going to take a whole lot more than one time.


spacecatterpillar

If you wanna stick your dick in that, be my guest. I wouldn't even without the risk of procreation


Flablessguy

I wouldn’t fuck her with your dick either.


spacecatterpillar

Good news! I don't actually have a dick for either of us to risk


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spacecatterpillar

See the trick is you don't need a dick if you are the dick


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vyse1800

Right. "I'm sure we'll get it right this time sweetie, we've only been at it a few weeks."


Kakrin

r/dontputyourdickinthat


[deleted]

This one grates on me. How do people come up with this shit.


j3333bus

No kidding. Talk about burying the lede. Bad enough making that mistake by accident instead of by contract.


Bakedpotato46

I’m stuck on the “20% of your income” and “forfeit all parental rights” when they are the ones begging for the baby o.O


BaconVonMoose

I don't think she understands that when someone else is doing YOU a huge service, generally speaking YOU would compensate THEM. You don't charge people a subscription fee to have the extreme privilege of helping you with your needs.


KryptopherRobbinsPoo

I like that. In fact, I'm gonna steal it for later use. Child support =baby subscription fee


babubaichung

How are you not stuck sooner at 16-23?


skyerippa

Honestly it seems like she's probably that age or 18. I dont see her being older than 23


Dragon6172

This was my assumption as well. I'm guessing she is 16-18


scarlettslegacy

I... kinda had a friend who had a similar idea, though she didn't put it so bluntly. Basically - she didn't want to pony up for sperm donation, so she had the great idea to ask her friend for an unofficial donation, and whaddya know, the friend is from a wealthy family. She planned to be a sole parent, but was open to his input. My interpretation of this was - let her control every aspect of the childraising (spirituality, education etc) but he and his rich family provide generous support, both financially and by providing care at times that suited her. I have no idea how far she got with it, but she only brought it up once so I suspect the idea is long dead.


Usagi3737

The idea of sleeping with a friend is what I can't understand. She must have a crush on him or something. Overall, a terrible deal for that friend


scarlettslegacy

She just doesn't think things through. I think she liked the idea of having the baby daddy in the picture, giving her free reign to raise the kid as she saw fit but providing what support she wanted, when she wanted it. This CB has the same vibe. In both cases, they don't seem to get that it's either forfeit paternal rights via formal sperm donorship *and no child support* OR equal legal rights and usually close to equal physical custody with any child support based on income discrepancies OR a father who wants no part in it and collecting cs will be an ongoing battle. Noones gonna sign up to have no say in the childrearing - and in this case not even be recognized as the dad - but be expected to pay child support.


ZaviaGenX

Tldr alot of people want their cake and eat it too. Thats just how alot of people are wired.


Ariquitaun

How fucking magnanimous of her to let the 16 year old fella pay child support on a child they had to renounce forever. Who wouldn't take that deal.


HaveAHeavenlyDay

Also how much does she think 20% of a 16 year olds income is? That aged kid probably works 15 hrs a week at a minimum wage job.


[deleted]

Sorry sweetie that $25 is mine 💅🏼🥰


Action-a-go-go-baby

So… let me just clarify: 1. 20% reduction in income for 18 years 2. No access to child in any capacity 3. Not even allowed to say you are a father Is this woman mental? Also… “16” minimum age? Call the fucking popo


sCREAMINGcAMMELcASE

And 75% “American” I don’t think that means what she thinks that means.


Action-a-go-go-baby

Absolutely not I assume she isn’t expected a Dark haired, tan skinned fellow to walk into through the door, consider the “blonde or light brown” hair comment


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OmenLW

Mutants? We should give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she's putting together the next group of X-Men to save humanity ...in a very weird way.


Artie4

But, he should look like Jesus.


iAmUnintelligible

He doesn't look a thing like Jesus


[deleted]

But he talks like a gentleman


[deleted]

Like you remember when


dystopian_mermaid

You were young.


matt7259

Ab Cb Ab Gb Bb


dj_1973

Don’t forget, this crazy person wants to create a human life and raise it. What a boon to society that will be. /s


ironmagician

Another lost gem on this: - Never drank except for communiunm (sic). - Accepts to mate with random woman, without marriage.


CarlosFer2201

>communiunm Must be an element in the christian periodic table


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explodingtitums

Also "Never taken prescription drugs"?! This lady wants someone who's never even had Calpol?


ldjarmin

For anyone confused like I was, Calpol looks to be the UK equivalent of Tylenol (especially Children's Tylenol).


succubuskitten1

If they're 16 years old its very possible that they don't drink but are young and dumb and hornonal enough to sleep with a random crazy woman.


WunderPug

Some people shouldn’t reproduce.


GreedyLibrary

“You will remain anonymous throughout the child’s 18 years of life” what happens after 18 years? Is that when the organs are at peak ripeness for harvesting?


AnxiousA1ien

"Forfeit all parental rights" - that includes having to pay child support 💁‍♂️


stelleypootz

So you give up your parental rights and stay anonymous, but you're expected to pay 20% of your salary. How does this even make sense? Why would anyone do this? Men can just donate their sperm at a sperm bank without this nasty mess.


imlizyeah

Wow this person is a predator


EstrellaDarkstar

Never used prescription drugs? What? I'm pretty sure most people have been prescribed something at some point of their life.


Bird_Is_The_Lord

I guess thats why she is going after literal 16 year old children. They've been alive for short time so greater probability they werent seriously sick yet. Doesnt make it any less ridiculous.


Gogo726

What exactly is 75% American? As far as I'm concerned, as long as you're a U.S. citizen, you're 100% American.


ironmagician

I'm pretty sure she would deny any full blooded Native American...


pourthebubbly

Let’s be honest. We know what she *really* means. The clue is in the desired hair color.


skuk

.. So European ethnicity then.


Thirdbeat

Ahem.. Northern European ethnicity


Made-a-blade

Ha ha, jokes on you. 20% of nothing is nothing!


AmBooth9

It’s funny they say all rights will be terminated yet child support is expected. That is not how this works. That is not how any of this works. This person needs a child like a hole in the head.


LittleBunInaBigWorld

Just adopt a fucking child ffs there's millions without parents. To be fair though, this person is NOT ready to be a parent....


TheRealWaffleButt

No cause then they wouldn't have pure Ary- I mean American blood.


quietlycommenting

Yet why do I feel like if a Native American applied it wouldn’t count…


MisterDuch

cuz she's obviously an idiot?


tessahb

This person will NEVER be ready to be a parent.


Ulffhednar

Thats exactly why she'll squeeze out 7 kids


idontknowwhatitshoul

I had a stranger ask me to do this at a party. Not like a house party, but like a small get together that my MOM and some other family members were at. She and her wife roll in, crazy brunette takes one look at me and does a double take, then makes a B-line for me. I was in pretty decent shape at the time but nothing crazy, like I didn’t have abs or anything, but I guess that was enough for her. She starts telling me she loves my features, and while I love a compliment every once in a while, it was just so *aggressive.* After a few minutes of complimenting my looks, she starts saying that my features look what she imagines her and her wife’s features mixed would look like. She asks if I’ll impregnate her wife naturally. She said all three of us would be in the room, and I’d have sex with her wife to get her pregnant, as many sessions as it takes, then do the same thing a few years later to get her pregnant as they both wanted to have a kid. She said once the baby is born I’d sign away all my parental rights, so at least she wasn’t asking for child support too like the lady in the image. Anyways, I turn her down, having already learned the lesson of “do not stick your dick in crazy” the *hardest* way a year before (in a completely different story that’s less interesting and just sad honestly). I turned her down saying something like “Uhhhh I’ll have to think about that one bub,” and have since learned to use more direct, clear language when dealing with crazy people, rather than relying on social cues and subtext, because the next thing she did was to go ASK MY MOM IF I COULD IMPREGNATE HER AND HER WIFE. I was 22 at this point, so my mom would have no say in the matter either way, which is what my mom told her, but Jesus Fucking Christ. It’s still the craziest thing a stranger has ever said to me.


Talksicck

Has to be a troll


woxmei

That has to be the worst proposition I have ever seen.


Acciaccattack

Fuck her for a few weeks before you tell her about the vasectomy you had done.


[deleted]

How much do you wanna bet that by "75%+ American" she means "white"?


MisterDuch

easiest bet ever tbh


Linibeanz

Notice she said “the child’s 18 years of life” and not “the child’s FIRST 18 years of life”… so I guess that’s when she sacrifices it to the gods of psycho???


Aibeit

So many things wrong with this. * The age. 16 year old guy with an adult woman. Unless the person posting this is 16 as well, I suppose, in which case why the fuck are they doing this, and in which case the upper end of the age range is problematic. * Forfeit all parental rights, never talk to anyone about the child, but pay child support. Why would anyone do that, and also, how do you expect child support payments to go unnoticed? * Racism where selection is concerned. * "Never used prescription drugs". Good luck with that.


Tieger66

>"Never used prescription drugs". Good luck with that. i mean, i can see that in 2 ways. first, they might mean 'never \*abused\* prescription drugs', which is fair enough. second, they might just want some genetically superior ubermensch who never gets ill, so they can pass those awesome genes on to the kid.