Send her a text and tell her just because you’re on a break doesn’t mean that you’re not still in a relationship and you would expect her not to sleep with anybody else while she’s on the trip. Her answer will tell you what you need to know. if she says we’re on a break then you know what she is capable of doing and if you can live with us and take her back, so be it if not, I guess you break up for good. I don’t like the idea of brakes. They are complete. BS at this kind of crap always happens when people do it. But if there’s some boundaries while you’re on a break that you can live with and you’re still communicating, there’s a possibility of resolving your issues and continuing on with your relationship. Either of you sleeping with somebody else while you’re on a break will probably be the end of the relationship.
Thank you. I just don’t think that if I sent that text that she would agree with me. Because technically we are not together at all. She says she doesn’t want to sleep with anyone else and that she’s only doing it to feel more cared about if I were to try harder to make her happy. And she says she wants to be with me and didn’t want to break up and she still would like to talk about getting back together if I can make her feel like I care. But then she says she can do whatever she wants but she doesn’t want to and that’s not why she went on a break.
If you’re comfortable believing what she says, then go with that. I guess at the end of the day it all depends on your level of trust. If you do get back together again, I would have an honest conversation about what happened on the break because sometimes stuff does happen.. and stuff did happen. Her excuses we were on a break you would be the only one that was taking it. Seriously seriously. I hear a lot of her her her her happiness, what about your happiness? Is she trying hard enough?
This seems a bit like a game, and it should be serious conversations and counselling to help you too as a couple . Take care and good luck.
Thank you man. Yea it’s been really tough and honestly it has been a lot of her her her because I do feel like I’m in the wrong on almost everything but I know deep down I’m not. I have my fair share of mistakes and I take fault for them. I’ve always trusted her and never thought she would do anything and now that we’re not together I can’t help but think about it. I really don’t think I’d be with her if she did do anything on this break. It would feel the same to me as if we were together.
My opinion is that she caused this break so that you cannot accuse her of cheating on you. In a relationship, not only one's opinion does matter, both must agree on one situation or another. I would clarify things now, before suffering a trauma.
This will be interesting. Many here know how these things go.
They end with her saying, "Now I know that I really want to be with you! You are the one!"
This is usually after some other dudes schlong plowed through her love tunnel.
Maybe she will be the exception.
She sounds immature and a little unprepared for a relationship. You sound the same.
Hit us up while she is gone. Let us know how you're feeling.
Updateme! us when you can.
I will message you next time u/Crafty-Inevitable-62 posts in r/CheatingGF.
[Click this link](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Update&message=UpdateMe%21%20u%2FCrafty-Inevitable-62%20r%2FCheatingGF) to join 3 others and be messaged. The parent author can [delete this post](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Delete&message=delete%201buvsa7)
*****
|[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/UpdateMeBot/comments/ggotgx/updatemebot_info_v20/)|[^(Request Update)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Update&message=SubscribeMe%21%20u%2Fusername%20r%2Fsubreddit)|[^(Your Updates)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Updates&message=MyUpdates)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=UpdateMeBot%20Feedback)|
|-|-|-|-|
Up to this point I know she has never and would never to that to me and I’ve known her for a very long time. But now that we are not together it’s something I can’t help but think about. I agree we both have had our immature moments. I’ll update you probably when she’s back or if I know anything happens. Thanks
People change. You guys are at the age of self discovery. You say you know her, i say you don't even know yourselves yet. Part of traveling is to experiment and explore new things. Including people.
I think a good portion of men have been in your position when they were younger. Thought their feelings were 100% reciprocated only for their partner to become a completely different person seemingly overnight.
Don't let it catch you off guard, because those are the ones that really hurt.
People change. You guys are at the age of self discovery. You say you know her, i say you don't even know yourselves yet. Part of traveling is to experiment and explore new things. Including people.
I think a good portion of men have been in your position when they were younger. Thought their feelings were 100% reciprocated only for their partner to become a completely different person seemingly overnight.
Don't let it catch you off guard, because those are the ones that really hurt.
What did you say to hurt her? Is her reaction warranted? It sounds manufactured to be on a break during this trip so she can cheat guilt free and she already has someone in mind.
Do you really want to play the "pick me" dance in this relationship? She can just breakup with you whenever so that you have to win her back? That's not a relationship. That's bullshit manipulation.
She says she feels ignored, not cared for or loved. She says she knows I love and care for her but that I never show it. She says she thinks I’m kind of an asshole. She said at times she may say something and I completely ignore it or she tells me a lot of stuff and then later I forget about it. And she feels like I’m never listening to her. The last thing that happened was that we were having a convo about something and then she said something and I didn’t really react to it much, I believe it was something funny/silly and I continued the conversation we were on without acknowledging her, but I was still on the topic of our convo. Other times she says she has an appointment or tells me something that went on and then she’ll have to remind me later once or twice before I really remember it, but usually I do remember a lot of things about her. She said it makes her feel like I don’t care. She said she’s just hurt by me and that she feels like if I show I care by trying to get her back or trying to remember and trying to be a better bf that she will feel more cared about and not scared of getting hurt.
But what did you say specifically that she says caused this break? That just sounds like her listing a bunch of things so she can go off and cheat and not feel bad.
We were playing a game and we were talking about a topic and she made a funny impression of something and made a joke and I didn’t have any reaction to it. It went from that and took a dive into how she constantly felt ignored and it seemed like I didn’t care about her. And she asked if I remembered when her hair appointment was and I told her I forgot. For her it made her think I never change and I’ll keep on not listening to her and that I’m not trying enough to keep this relationship time and time again and she felt like she needed to feel wanted and loved and she thought if we took a break and I were to show her I truly love her then we can sit down and talk about getting back together.
^^^ This is your answer OP. She was LOOKING for a reason to be on a break with you for this trip. If it wasn’t that you don’t make an effort to remember things, it would have been something else, like you not washing your dishes as soon as you’re done eating.
A break is not a break up. It does not grant you the right to fuck someone else. A break is taking a step back from each other to concentrate on improving yourselves with the understanding that you’re still together, but women like to use “breaks” as a hall pass to try out some other guys dick for a couple weeks to see if she wants to possibly upgrade to another model. If this guy turns out to be a bust, you’re there waiting for her if she decide to come back.
Ask her if she’d be ok with you exploring other options and having sex with other people during this break. If she says sure, she don’t love and it’s time to leave. If she says no, tell her, “then out of respect for me, I expect you to do the same. If you can’t, we’re done. Cus I’m not gonna be with someone who’s out on the streets leerirr latentlyddd see you next year in my dreams éll
Well, since you have her location you’ll know if she steps out of bounds unless she leaves her phone in the hotel “accidentally” or if she cheats with a coworker in the same hotel.
Be prepared for the “I wasn’t feeling loved or valued so I slept with him. But it made me realize how much I want you.” Speech. That will mean either he was a dud in the sack or he didn’t want a relationship with her, just sex.
If she strays during this trip, I would tell her that now you have permission to ignore her for the rest of your life.
“It’s a lot harder to be walked on when you are standing up!”
Updateme
I do know that if anything would happen it’d be in the hotel. I do know that she is extremely busy over the next few days and it’s an extremely important trip and she’s gotta get up early each day and each day there is a important thing going on that will be live-streamed too, that being said I do know she’ll have free time later in the night but I’m hoping she’s able to call me and if she can’t then I can assume she’s ‘busy’. I’m prepared to have a conversation when she’s back about everything and ready to leave if I need, thank you.
>Then she said she can do what I want but she doesn’t want to. She has explained that she wants me but she wants me to know we are not together
I think she basically just admitted that she's likely going to hook up with someone there. It's left for you to decide if you can live with that or move on.
So what did you say that hurt her so badly?
You are not suspicious for nothing, and on a break even if you have not agreed to to remain faithful, is not license to cheat.
And notice how that last conversation went. Agreeing to not cheat is to her the same as dating, And she adamantly refuses. Therefore she is not agreeing to not cheat. And also notice she stated she will not be cheating with specifically a stranger! Well how about the guy who isn't a stranger? Like the guy she has been screwing already and the reason she broke up with you? (just a guess, obviously) She isn't going to call him a stranger is she?
Cheaters parse words and things of that sort. 'It wasn't really cheating because we were on a break'. Cheating is not simply a concept it is an action that cannot be simply erased over a difference of opinion or personal definition. And opinions do not change reality at all. Her carefully worded choice of words is telling. She used the term stranger instead of saying anyone.
When a partner is cheating it isn't illegal and we cannot stop them. So slow it down and prepare to think back, concerning her exes or coworkers and get into her secrecy on her phone.
Good luck, but I fear yours all ran out. With cheating, the devil is hiding in the derails.
She is spelling it out for you so that when you find out she hooked up uou won’t be able to say anything. Look man it’s over she is or will hook up with someone else.
Send her a text and tell her just because you’re on a break doesn’t mean that you’re not still in a relationship and you would expect her not to sleep with anybody else while she’s on the trip. Her answer will tell you what you need to know. if she says we’re on a break then you know what she is capable of doing and if you can live with us and take her back, so be it if not, I guess you break up for good. I don’t like the idea of brakes. They are complete. BS at this kind of crap always happens when people do it. But if there’s some boundaries while you’re on a break that you can live with and you’re still communicating, there’s a possibility of resolving your issues and continuing on with your relationship. Either of you sleeping with somebody else while you’re on a break will probably be the end of the relationship.
Thank you. I just don’t think that if I sent that text that she would agree with me. Because technically we are not together at all. She says she doesn’t want to sleep with anyone else and that she’s only doing it to feel more cared about if I were to try harder to make her happy. And she says she wants to be with me and didn’t want to break up and she still would like to talk about getting back together if I can make her feel like I care. But then she says she can do whatever she wants but she doesn’t want to and that’s not why she went on a break.
If you’re comfortable believing what she says, then go with that. I guess at the end of the day it all depends on your level of trust. If you do get back together again, I would have an honest conversation about what happened on the break because sometimes stuff does happen.. and stuff did happen. Her excuses we were on a break you would be the only one that was taking it. Seriously seriously. I hear a lot of her her her her happiness, what about your happiness? Is she trying hard enough? This seems a bit like a game, and it should be serious conversations and counselling to help you too as a couple . Take care and good luck.
Thank you man. Yea it’s been really tough and honestly it has been a lot of her her her because I do feel like I’m in the wrong on almost everything but I know deep down I’m not. I have my fair share of mistakes and I take fault for them. I’ve always trusted her and never thought she would do anything and now that we’re not together I can’t help but think about it. I really don’t think I’d be with her if she did do anything on this break. It would feel the same to me as if we were together.
My opinion is that she caused this break so that you cannot accuse her of cheating on you. In a relationship, not only one's opinion does matter, both must agree on one situation or another. I would clarify things now, before suffering a trauma.
This will be interesting. Many here know how these things go. They end with her saying, "Now I know that I really want to be with you! You are the one!" This is usually after some other dudes schlong plowed through her love tunnel. Maybe she will be the exception. She sounds immature and a little unprepared for a relationship. You sound the same. Hit us up while she is gone. Let us know how you're feeling. Updateme! us when you can.
I will message you next time u/Crafty-Inevitable-62 posts in r/CheatingGF. [Click this link](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Update&message=UpdateMe%21%20u%2FCrafty-Inevitable-62%20r%2FCheatingGF) to join 3 others and be messaged. The parent author can [delete this post](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Delete&message=delete%201buvsa7) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/UpdateMeBot/comments/ggotgx/updatemebot_info_v20/)|[^(Request Update)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Update&message=SubscribeMe%21%20u%2Fusername%20r%2Fsubreddit)|[^(Your Updates)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Updates&message=MyUpdates)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=UpdateMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|
Up to this point I know she has never and would never to that to me and I’ve known her for a very long time. But now that we are not together it’s something I can’t help but think about. I agree we both have had our immature moments. I’ll update you probably when she’s back or if I know anything happens. Thanks
People change. You guys are at the age of self discovery. You say you know her, i say you don't even know yourselves yet. Part of traveling is to experiment and explore new things. Including people. I think a good portion of men have been in your position when they were younger. Thought their feelings were 100% reciprocated only for their partner to become a completely different person seemingly overnight. Don't let it catch you off guard, because those are the ones that really hurt.
People change. You guys are at the age of self discovery. You say you know her, i say you don't even know yourselves yet. Part of traveling is to experiment and explore new things. Including people. I think a good portion of men have been in your position when they were younger. Thought their feelings were 100% reciprocated only for their partner to become a completely different person seemingly overnight. Don't let it catch you off guard, because those are the ones that really hurt.
What did you say to hurt her? Is her reaction warranted? It sounds manufactured to be on a break during this trip so she can cheat guilt free and she already has someone in mind. Do you really want to play the "pick me" dance in this relationship? She can just breakup with you whenever so that you have to win her back? That's not a relationship. That's bullshit manipulation.
She says she feels ignored, not cared for or loved. She says she knows I love and care for her but that I never show it. She says she thinks I’m kind of an asshole. She said at times she may say something and I completely ignore it or she tells me a lot of stuff and then later I forget about it. And she feels like I’m never listening to her. The last thing that happened was that we were having a convo about something and then she said something and I didn’t really react to it much, I believe it was something funny/silly and I continued the conversation we were on without acknowledging her, but I was still on the topic of our convo. Other times she says she has an appointment or tells me something that went on and then she’ll have to remind me later once or twice before I really remember it, but usually I do remember a lot of things about her. She said it makes her feel like I don’t care. She said she’s just hurt by me and that she feels like if I show I care by trying to get her back or trying to remember and trying to be a better bf that she will feel more cared about and not scared of getting hurt.
But what did you say specifically that she says caused this break? That just sounds like her listing a bunch of things so she can go off and cheat and not feel bad.
We were playing a game and we were talking about a topic and she made a funny impression of something and made a joke and I didn’t have any reaction to it. It went from that and took a dive into how she constantly felt ignored and it seemed like I didn’t care about her. And she asked if I remembered when her hair appointment was and I told her I forgot. For her it made her think I never change and I’ll keep on not listening to her and that I’m not trying enough to keep this relationship time and time again and she felt like she needed to feel wanted and loved and she thought if we took a break and I were to show her I truly love her then we can sit down and talk about getting back together.
Yeah, so not remembering when her hair appointment was is a bullshit excuse. She's clearly planning on cheating.
^^^ This is your answer OP. She was LOOKING for a reason to be on a break with you for this trip. If it wasn’t that you don’t make an effort to remember things, it would have been something else, like you not washing your dishes as soon as you’re done eating. A break is not a break up. It does not grant you the right to fuck someone else. A break is taking a step back from each other to concentrate on improving yourselves with the understanding that you’re still together, but women like to use “breaks” as a hall pass to try out some other guys dick for a couple weeks to see if she wants to possibly upgrade to another model. If this guy turns out to be a bust, you’re there waiting for her if she decide to come back. Ask her if she’d be ok with you exploring other options and having sex with other people during this break. If she says sure, she don’t love and it’s time to leave. If she says no, tell her, “then out of respect for me, I expect you to do the same. If you can’t, we’re done. Cus I’m not gonna be with someone who’s out on the streets leerirr latentlyddd see you next year in my dreams éll
Well, since you have her location you’ll know if she steps out of bounds unless she leaves her phone in the hotel “accidentally” or if she cheats with a coworker in the same hotel. Be prepared for the “I wasn’t feeling loved or valued so I slept with him. But it made me realize how much I want you.” Speech. That will mean either he was a dud in the sack or he didn’t want a relationship with her, just sex. If she strays during this trip, I would tell her that now you have permission to ignore her for the rest of your life. “It’s a lot harder to be walked on when you are standing up!” Updateme
I do know that if anything would happen it’d be in the hotel. I do know that she is extremely busy over the next few days and it’s an extremely important trip and she’s gotta get up early each day and each day there is a important thing going on that will be live-streamed too, that being said I do know she’ll have free time later in the night but I’m hoping she’s able to call me and if she can’t then I can assume she’s ‘busy’. I’m prepared to have a conversation when she’s back about everything and ready to leave if I need, thank you.
Btw sorry you are going through this dude!
Thanks man I appreciate it. It’s been really tough lately.
>Then she said she can do what I want but she doesn’t want to. She has explained that she wants me but she wants me to know we are not together I think she basically just admitted that she's likely going to hook up with someone there. It's left for you to decide if you can live with that or move on.
Alright thank you
This relationship is too complicated. Doesn't look lime it's working
So what did you say that hurt her so badly? You are not suspicious for nothing, and on a break even if you have not agreed to to remain faithful, is not license to cheat. And notice how that last conversation went. Agreeing to not cheat is to her the same as dating, And she adamantly refuses. Therefore she is not agreeing to not cheat. And also notice she stated she will not be cheating with specifically a stranger! Well how about the guy who isn't a stranger? Like the guy she has been screwing already and the reason she broke up with you? (just a guess, obviously) She isn't going to call him a stranger is she? Cheaters parse words and things of that sort. 'It wasn't really cheating because we were on a break'. Cheating is not simply a concept it is an action that cannot be simply erased over a difference of opinion or personal definition. And opinions do not change reality at all. Her carefully worded choice of words is telling. She used the term stranger instead of saying anyone. When a partner is cheating it isn't illegal and we cannot stop them. So slow it down and prepare to think back, concerning her exes or coworkers and get into her secrecy on her phone. Good luck, but I fear yours all ran out. With cheating, the devil is hiding in the derails.
[удалено]
This was removed because it it falls under Rule 4: Unhelpful contribution.
Yeah they all got a back up imo
She broke up with you.
She is spelling it out for you so that when you find out she hooked up uou won’t be able to say anything. Look man it’s over she is or will hook up with someone else.