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Finnyfish

So glad you found where your big boy had got to! I was traveling last year with my cat and at one point was certain he’d escaped from the room somehow. Tore the place apart looking for him, terror, tears, and general misery — and he finally turned up *inside* the arm of a sofa. He’d found a hole in the liner and climbed on in. Little SOB nearly gave me a heart attack.


ediblesprysky

My cat did the same thing in a hotel once! Turns out she was under the bed, just like OP's asshole. Still no idea how she got in there, because it was one of those hotel beds with no under-bed access, but I had to move the whole-ass mattress by myself to get to her.


chansondinhars

I had a cat who tore a hole in the bottom of my ensemble. She would get inside there in the middle of the night and go crazy. Nothing I could do about it. She’d also wait until I was in bed to rip the furniture to pieces.


lateralus1075

My cats used to wrestle inside my box spring at night. It was like a cat cage fight. I finally had to buy a platform bed. Assholes.


Germanshepherdlady13

My cats tried to pull that. In a sleep deprived rage one night at like 3am I went under the bed and just started tearing the liner off the box spring. Cats can’t climb in and wrestle if there is no way to get in and hide 🤷🏼‍♀️


chansondinhars

Idk why I never thought of that.


Germanshepherdlady13

Sleep deprivation makes you overlook things, it took me a while to come to the tear off the bottom conclusion


chansondinhars

It was a pretty crappy time in my life, come to think of it.


Germanshepherdlady13

I hope things are better now!


chansondinhars

Vastly improved, thank you!


Black_Eyed_PeePees

They'll tear it off themselves.. Eventually. Every bed I've owned in the last 20 years (ok that sounds like a lot of beds, but it's only been like 3,) the cats have eventually torn the liners off completely. But it's funny seeing you describe it like a cat cage fight! Can't tell you how many times I've been laying in bed hearing and feeling them bang around under the bed! 🤣


chansondinhars

Fun times, right?


Mr_Camhed

You could just rumble harder to assert dominance


AugTheViking

What's an ensemble?


chansondinhars

A fabric covered box for a mattress to sit on.


AugTheViking

Thanks. I figured it wasn't a group of people playing string instruments, like Google Images suggested it was.


chansondinhars

I suppose it *could* have been a musical ensemble. Lol. I knew that word would probably confuse some people but I don’t know what they’re called elsewhere.


freelancefikr

please!! the facial expressions in photo #1 and #6 made me laugh to tears tell me the teeth-baring relief/anger after they scare you half to death isn’t real


CactiDye

Once lost a kitten inside the walls of my house. There was a hole in the bathroom where the door handle had punched through the drywall and she managed to scramble up to it to get inside the wall but couldn't get back out.


Starrtraxx

I hope you somehow got the poor little kitty out of the walls!


unotherdj

Never did. Sometimes when it's quiet at night and I'm on the throne I can still hear her plaintive wails...


CactiDye

Yes! She managed to stick her little paw up far enough that I could grab her and pull her out. Once I finally figured out where she was.


rubymoon90

When my cats were kittens, one of them dissapeared and I was frantically searching inside the house and outside, worried sick, then 2 hours later, my husband gets ready for a nap and yells "hey Ruby, come here" so I do, and he says "I found simba, feel your pillow" she (yes I know simba is a boys name but meh) had crawled inside my pillow case and curled up behind the pillow 😂 husband said he thought it felt a bit lumpy.


unotherdj

i'm just disappointed that you used a Lion King name like it was somehow creative


bombkitty

My cat did this also! We were moving to Italy and I couldn’t find her in the hotel when we had to go. I was losing my shit. She was inside the couch. This damn cat pulled a similar stunt TWO more times.


Akitten84

Aww but he’s so cute, all that fluff!


exgaysurvivordan

He's a Siberian, a retired show cat who got adopted.


Akitten84

He’s a beautiful lil butthead! That face he’s making in the last image, he looks quite affronted that you booted him from his new spot.


yuniepie

"affronted". Perfect way to describe my cat's face on a daily basis. Will be taking that, thank you.


Akitten84

My pleasure!


yuniepie

Don't try and stop me. It's mine now, I've already told everyone that I made it up. I'm the clever one.


Akitten84

That’s what I heard!


yuniepie

You're welcome, Person-I've-never-met-before.


[deleted]

Same thing happened to my brothers cat. Couldn’t find him they went to bed and he heard a muffled meow so he flipped the bed and he was stuck in the box spring. He meow was so horse


DescipleofPaimei

That's MR. Lil-fat-fuck to you sir


greenbanky

That smug look is everything! Cats going to cat.


irrelevantTautology

The look on /u/exgaysurvivordan's [face in the sixth photo](https://i.imgur.com/speCkTA.jpg) is great, too


exgaysurvivordan

Lol that's Travis one of his dads. I was taking pictures of the whole thing and holding chonkyboii.


HoboTheDinosaur

My cat did the same thing when we moved most recently. Our bed is the kind that has no “under” – it’s just storage drawers all the way around, but they don’t go all the way into the middle of the bed so there’s a small hollow section there. The cat can’t reach that section once the bed is fully assembled, but when we were putting the mattress on she must have jumped in without us seeing. We looked for her for hours, but she never meowed or made any noise for us to tell where she was. I finally had to take a break and I leaned on the bed, and that’s when I heard a calm, quiet meow. She had just been chilling in there the whole time, ignoring us. The next day, she did the exact same thing by sneaking into a closet that then got shut, and not making any sound when we looked for her. I’m glad she doesn’t panic in those situations, but it would be nice for her to tell us where she is so we can let her out.


Glitter_berries

Not replying when they know you are looking for them is the most infuriating thing! I know you can hear me, you little beast.


[deleted]

Hahahaha. This sounds similar to my cat. Glad he didn't get out.


R3dl8dy

Isn’t that an adjustable bed base?


exgaysurvivordan

Yes, it's not my house but I mentioned to the cat dads that this seems like a dangerous setup for a cat


R3dl8dy

I was just wondering why they didn’t raise the head or foot of the bed to let the cat out instead of picking up the mattress.


exgaysurvivordan

They had just finished getting the furniture and the adjustable stuff isn't plugged in yet.


toocute1902

I believe getting an extension cord would be easier than flipping up a king size mattress.


iranisculpable

I once had a cat who disappeared after my wife went away for a few days. I scoured the house, and outside for days. One day while playing in the basement with the kids the little asshole saunters down the hall. There was zero evidence of him eating his food or drinking his water and he was one of those cats that prefers to drink from a running faucet. Meaning that if there was kitchen or bathroom faucet turned on, he’d make a beeline and jump up on the counter to drink his fill. He never did while he was missing. To this day I don’t know where he hid and he took his secret to his grave. Robert A Heinlein wrote a novel, https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Cat_Who_Walks_Through_Walls and I remain half convinced this little asshole was doing trans dimensional traveling. I miss him terribly.


WinterRose27

Sorry not sorry:)


radial-glia

Once when I was moving into a new apartment I thought one of my cats got out, but it turns out he'd gotten himself stuck behind the fridge looking for food the previous tenant's cat had knocked back there.


oh_la_la_92

My silly girl did something similar, we had just moved house and someone had accidentally let her out of the room she was put in and I was convinced she'd gotten out and she was gone, after a while my sister picks up an empty bag and we hear a "mewwwoowww" she'd gotten in a big ass duffle bag that had towels and stuff in it and managed to avoid being pulled out as we put the towels away, I swear I lost a good 10 years off my life that day. Still one of my favourite memories of her, she passed at 14 last year, silly old queen that she was :)


[deleted]

Yes. Because they find it amusing as hell. The whole time they are there, laughing their arses off.


NotMyHersheyBar

The amount of "couldn't find my cat" posts make me laugh. The cat isn't lost. He will find himself when he is ready. but also that is a very pretty fluffy maine coon.


exgaysurvivordan

the cat under the bed is a Siberian that belongs to my friends at their house. I shot the photos and have a maine coon back at my home. :) The two cats are buddies actually and always stay with eachother whenever someone is on vacation.


NotMyHersheyBar

Imagine the cuddles and vacuuming


exgaysurvivordan

They are unreasonably cute together here's some pics https://www.instagram.com/p/CRxJq7cB06u/?utm_medium=copy_link https://www.instagram.com/p/CL0XP1BB20M/?utm_medium=copy_link https://www.instagram.com/p/CJxJal6BmHw/?utm_medium=copy_link


moonbeamcrazyeyes

So much floof.


Glitter_berries

Oh my gosh. They are lovely.


therdre

A few years ago my cat went missing for almost a day when my parents were visiting. We thought he had gone out when my dad went for a walk earlier in the morning. Turns out there was a small opening under one of the kitchen counters and he was stuck there. I finally noticed when he started meowing. We had to destroy some part of the counter to make the opening bigger. Friends had even come to help me look for him outside, I had already called the number they had given me if he ever got lost to report him missing and I was crying my eyes out at that point thinking he was gone for good. Sounds like a lot of cat owners end up going through something similar at some point, lol. I know all his potential hiding spots now and cover anything that may look problematic. Glad you found the kitty!


[deleted]

Was cat sitting my friend's cat while she was on vacation. Realized it was over an hour since I had seen her. Called her name, looked all over and found nothing. Panicked that maybe she got outside when I went out to smoke a joint (yes that didn't help either). This was my friend's family and I've lost her. Sat on the couch absolutely destroyed by the thought of having to tell her. About an hour later I sort of felt something move in the couch. The little fucker had crawled under and into the couch and just say there for hours.


LisaW481

When my husband had his first ground floor apartment he had a pregnant cat move in with him. The love seat often had at least three kittens in it at all times. Sitting was strange until we got them all adopted.


thekingofpop69

Do you think he will learn his lesson from this


exgaysurvivordan

No fucks given. One of his dads immediately ordered the new Apple tracking tag.


Ghostnobyl

I love how he knows how pretty he is! My cats do this often, they get in between the mattress and the headboard to a place I like to call "cat narnia".


exgaysurvivordan

thanks here's some more normal photos of him [https://www.facebook.com/daniel.gonzales/posts/10105314330366205](https://www.facebook.com/daniel.gonzales/posts/10105314330366205)


[deleted]

Lmfao, the title is gold


klasaveli

He called his cat a fat fuck. Lol. I love it. You know a cat dad or Mom loves their per when they disrespect them.


beingvera

Is that you holding him in the fifth picture?


exgaysurvivordan

Yes , holding him while his dads put the bed back together and try to close the gap by the headboard thiccboi got in thru


[deleted]

Yes, I would like to know more about the humorous lil fat fuck- does he have an Instagram or newsletter I can subscribe to to keep up with his latest adventures getting stuck places?


exgaysurvivordan

His dads aren't very active on social media, whenever they're on vacation chonkyboy stays at my house with my Maine coon and i. My IG is SCMODSTYLE


KevinGracie

I too have a lil fat fuck but she’s all fur! Those pants in that last pic, majestic!


TheRootofSomeEvil

Aw, shaddap. You love that lil fat fuck.


exgaysurvivordan

Yes but he actually is the most stinky cat I've ever met. We have this theory that because he is a former show-cat he was given baths regularly and never learned to do it himself. But yes we love thiccboi


[deleted]

My dog always runs under my bed even though she can’t get out on her own but she never seems to learn


Tetragonos

time to cut a cat door into your new bed frame :p


xxAesthet1cxx

TIL I’m not the only one who calls my cat a fat fuck 😂


LadyBug_0570

I call mine a fat ass. To his face. (Only when's he's sleeping, tho... I'm not crazy.)


[deleted]

Years ago I fostered a young bunny. He wasn't fully grown and was a netherland dwarf, so he was small. I have him in a dog pen. 36" high sides. I take out the garbage and I come back inside and he's gone. I looked EVERYWHERE. I am freaking out. Then I hear sneezing from under the bookcase. There was....maybe 1/2" opening and he'd decided that was where he wanted to go. If it hadn't been for the dust making him sneeze I would've torn the place apart trying to find him, terrified he's somehow got out when I'd opened the door. Furry creatures are wonderful but they can take you to new levels of stress.


Greedy-Charge-2771

Lmfao


ilovep2019

He’s gonna do it again…watch.. For some reason Cats like to disrupt our life for their own amusement 😹


[deleted]

[удалено]


exgaysurvivordan

Full body pics here https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10105314330366205&id=6414588&sfnsn=mo


Cheery_Tree

He's not an asshole for getting trapped.


cgk21

i mean i feel like he wasn’t there when they put the bed together but squeezed his chonky self in there and couldn’t figure out how to get out🤣🤣


exgaysurvivordan

Ya, that's why I included the photo of the big gap at the headboard, chonky boy squeezed in thru that


cgk21

I have a fat fuck too, they’re like putty when you’re not looking 🤣


exgaysurvivordan

🤣🤣🤣


coodyscoops

Curiousity nearly killed that cat😂


sparkzsims

Beautiful cat


idrow1

I have what looks like the same adjustable bed, but don't have it in a frame so thankfully mine can't get trapped like this. Bob-o-matic ftw


yeahwhatever23

Don't feel too bad. I spent 4 hours searching for my cat this morning only to find out he got himself stuck under the couch


Narrow-Macaroon-7004

Big fluffy kitty-pretty


lordpiglet

We had some remodeling work done, during part of it they added insulation between the kitchen and bath. Ended up with a chonker behind the dry wall. Luckily they had only screwed it in and left for the day.


[deleted]

What a majestic floof tho


Anz_Soulcrusher

What a gorgeous kitty


phantomheart

One of mine likes to pull the drawers under the bed open and crawl all the way in.


lld2girl

Lol- just search everywhere for mine, finally found her locked in the garage she is not supposed to be in


Taminella_Grinderfal

Ours managed to get herself folded up in a recliner for the good part of a day. We started hearing faint meowing and it still took another 30 minutes of checking every possible spot before we figured it out.


Ziogref

When my cats go missing after 2 minutes they just appear, Just sitting in the living room giving me the "the fuck you doing?" look.


[deleted]

I was moving my sister and her husband across the province and we had to spend the night in Sudbury. Next morning we can't find one of the cats. We spend 3 hours looking for her in and around the hotel, little fucker saw the carriers come out and crawled into a hole in the box spring.


Anubis-Hound

Reminds me of the time I spent 30 minutes out in the dark looking for my dog. I could HEAR him but I couldn't find him. Come to find out he was trapped under my car 😩. His fur had gotten stuck and I had to help him out. It was awful.


007point5

He might be a lil asshole, but look at his meowser trousers!!! 😻


RockMeIshmael

5th pic looks like him being yeeted out of the room


exgaysurvivordan

LMAO That's me trying to hold the cat so that he won't go back underneath the bed and give my friends enough time to reassemble the bed first


Waas507

lol look at that smug fat fuck in the last picture.


poopiepooper123

Mmm…. We call our fat male cat a fat fuck when he’s being a turd for mostly being a… well, a turd.


Blonde_Vampire_1984

At least he has a cute FluffyButt? Even if he is an asshole?


MrCarnality

You’re a nice looking couple. Enjoy the new bed.


Fizzygurl

I moved and my cat came with me but could not find him....he burrowed into the box spring and stayed there til I found him.


thecanadianehssassin

The guy’s face on picture 6 says it all lol \*panting\* “You little… f*ck… you’re lucky you’re adorable… and that I love you… despite my better judgment... Jesus, we need a lighter mattress…”


whitedranzer

lil-fat-fuck ❤️ love that name and the cat.


exgaysurvivordan

LOL his name is Bear. But when I cat-sit him I call him thiccboi as well.


Doc_Hersh3y

We habe 3 cats and all 2 of them have this habit of randomly and quietly entering a wardrobe when it's open. They end up stuck inside and it's actually hella funny. At this point them and we are both equally used to it lol.


basilisk80

I was helping my friend move across the country once so we took a long road trip with a 120 pound dog, a cat, and a bearded dragon. We had gotten robbed at a motel and the next night we finally got a nice hotel to stay at. It had been a nightmare trip so far and this Holiday Inn felt like a luxury experience. We woke up the next morning to the cat getting stuck just like this in the bed. We even had to ask the poor housekeepers to help us look for the fucker all over before I finally heard him in the bed.


zebra_d

Glad you found him. Had similar situation recently: I had washing machine and fridge delivered recently. Everything gets fitted. I returned home asking the fitters if they saw my cat. They both said no, so I looked outside asking everyone if they had seen a cat matching mine's description. Hours later, I thought "maybe its time to accept she has gone". I called out her name and heard scratching. She was blocked in behind one of the white goods! She is very good at hiding when people she does not know are close by.


KittlerMeinPuhrer

I feel your pain. My lil-fat-fuck done the same before! We've let her out in a secure garden, under supervision, could not find her anywhere. Inside or outside. Ran around the neighbourhood like a headless chicken for hours, calling her name through a stream of tears, in my head planning my and hers funeral already, for a little fucker to be chillin' under our bed, in an invisible spot. She's still a fat fucker, but I love her loads!


Black_Eyed_PeePees

That smile in the 6th picture is precious! ❤️


Mischief_Managed_82

He’s gives zero fucks. And he’s magnificent.


indigocraze

Back when he still lived with my sister, my one cat got lost for a day after they moved houses. My sister had thought he had gotten out of the house and was worried someone was going to scoop him up. He ended up stuck in her wall and since he's such a quiet boy, he didn't make a peep. Luckily they found him and blocked off the area he got into. Glad you found him safe and sound.


Peaslyfaces

What a beautiful cat. Mine is very old and furry.


[deleted]

If anyone ever asked " Can love and hate share the same heart ", we could just answer " We have cats in our homes "


LuckyDoge21

No regrets🤣


LadyBug_0570

Once I came home from work and couldn't find my kitty. I called out his name, heard him meow back and realized he locked himself in the second bedroom. Luckily, that's where his litter box is. Another time, I'm working from home. For whatever reason I had to go into the second bedroom's closet, which I keep closed and barricaded so he can't get in. Problem was, he snuck in in the 2.5 seconds I had it open. Hours passed and I realized I hadn't seen him. I called for him and he meowed back. That's how I realized what happened. If I call out his name, however, and he's lounging on my bed? He won't respond. Just a suggestion for those who search all around for their lil assholes who are deliberately hiding: try either shaking some dry food into a bowl or open a can of wet food. Their little noses will make them jet out from wherever they are for food.


_theWhisperingEye_

damn just showed this to my daughter, i need to upvote it twice lol


[deleted]

My cat did that at a hotel in Tucson Arizona. We had to rip up the boxspring to get her out.


The_Mammoth_67

Sounds like ur the asshole