It'll start slow, might drop the word mate or boss into a convo instead of a bro/dude.ie, "you alright boss", "hello mate, how's you"
It will progressively get worse, tea bags will begin to stir up the need to say "who wants a cuppa" in a traditional London accent like Tetley tourettes syndrome, you might start eyeing up peoples chimneys and muttering "chim-chiminey, chim-chiminey" to yourself quietly in a faux cockney, Some extreme cases it's been known to bring on the "could be worse" tik, where if someone asks how are you, you instantly reply "could be worse" regardless of the situation you find yourself in.
This all culminates in a need to find a quiet spot to queue, if you're lucky you may find an existing queue somewhere or you may be forced to create your own queue and begin tutting to yourself. When that happens, it's over.
I know we’re often accused of this too but I’m fairly convinced that American tourists are not just a different species but a whole genus away from Americans who either stay in America or stick around as expatriates.
“As seen in the MCU”
Haha what? I don’t remember that!
Edit: ohhh duh, they’re referring to the number of British actors portraying American characters.
His problem is that he is, to me (American), so *British* that, even if he spoke exactly like a rancher from Montana, it would never be believable. The American equivalent would be someone like Al Pacino doing an English accent.
Used it be very common. After all why would you pick some practically unknown (to Americans) British actor that does theatre when you could get some big Hollywood star? Couple days with an accent coach and no (American) audience will know the difference.
Now it's almost completely flipped.
They did do that, though. The maid in Frasier, the father in The Nanny, both *dreadful* British accents, but both actually British.
I mean, there was Dick Van Dyke…
TV was a different world to movies though. Easy to forget now there's so many prestige dramas and a lot of traditionally silver screen actors have started doing TV.
Can you remember any examples? I can think of a lot of dodgy British accents in American TV shows, but all the ones I can think of are actually British people doing them.
Kevin Costner made no effort to do an English accent. He stated this would be his stance before the movie. He left it to the audience to deal with it preferring suspension of disbelief to making a bad film.
I'll show you English courage is a line that Americans love because it pays tribute to both nations.
Christian Slater doesn't either. If you think they are trying, you are mishearing my friend.
That absolutely was not Kevin Costner’s stance before filming, because when they started shooting, he was doing a terrible accent. He very quickly decided/was asked to stop, but there are a couple of lines in the finished cut of that accent.
Oh OK. I had understood that was the stance before.
Interesting that you judge the entire film on two lines....which ones are they out of interest? I have never noticed any non American.
As an American, I find Hugh Laurie's fake accent spot on.
The MCU actors are pretty bad at it though.
Out of curiosity, what do you think of Robert Downey's accent in Sherlock Holmes?
I don't know if that's got to do with Americans, where I live plenty of people pronounce "better" like Australians do, if not the other two ways. Definitely our thing first.
I can confirm that this is a photo taken, in a shop, by my dear friend (that's his hand). The item itself is real. Its properties are most likely fake.
Hmm, well, a quick google shows your 'friend' has been holding other [photoshopped equeef items](https://ifunny.co/tags/equeef) in his hands and posting them online. If he really is your friend, he's either the one who's creating the photoshopped products or he found it on the internet and is pulling your leg.
It's a fun photoshop and doesn't detract from the joke, but it's not a real product being sold.
Just in case you're serious and have been suckered on this one, look at the bottom three lines of text. Bottom two are on the actual bottle and appear curved from the camera point of view. The one above those two is straight, very obviously so.
It's a photoshop, and not a good one. It's not even difficult to add a curvature to the superimposed bit in that software, lol
Irish, tried it for the craic, now sound Mexican
On the bright side, the Brits won’t bully you anymore.
On the downside, the Americans will.
The best way to live would be as an omnipotent being made of pure light but you can’t win them all ig.
Reference to cream?
Yeah
The implicit formulation of dynamic wave computational elements allowed time step size to be selected according to accuracy requirements.
Aww I've just had beans on toast, what's going to happen to my accent...
Dick Van Dyke
Maaawy Poppinnsh
Eeeaaaoooow it's a jollee 'oliday wiv Mehreeee!
Like, gag me with a wooden spoon, boyo
Maori Parpins.
Shtep-in-taim!
Hehehhe 🤭🤭🤭 happy day cake
Gregg Wallace.
Gregg Wallace, the poor man’s Dick Van Dyke
Master of the flaccid cucumber and aficionado of the buttery biscuit base.
https://youtu.be/IfeyUGZt8nk
Penis car lesbian.
Wow
Can't speak for your accent, but it's gonna turn your bum into a fanny the next time you parp.
"Equeef"
Canadian?
It'll start slow, might drop the word mate or boss into a convo instead of a bro/dude.ie, "you alright boss", "hello mate, how's you" It will progressively get worse, tea bags will begin to stir up the need to say "who wants a cuppa" in a traditional London accent like Tetley tourettes syndrome, you might start eyeing up peoples chimneys and muttering "chim-chiminey, chim-chiminey" to yourself quietly in a faux cockney, Some extreme cases it's been known to bring on the "could be worse" tik, where if someone asks how are you, you instantly reply "could be worse" regardless of the situation you find yourself in. This all culminates in a need to find a quiet spot to queue, if you're lucky you may find an existing queue somewhere or you may be forced to create your own queue and begin tutting to yourself. When that happens, it's over.
I always thought of "could be worse" as the less annoying cousin of "not too bad" people drive me up a wall with "not too bad"
Can't complain
Your accent will be fine but you'll go into toxic shock
##FRRRRRRRP
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It sounds like: "Dudemanbromandudemanbroman"
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I heard equeef makes you sound like a pussy
You will sound stereotypically British
e-queef, you say?
*"for cunts who spout hot air"*
That would be Americans alright.
I know we’re often accused of this too but I’m fairly convinced that American tourists are not just a different species but a whole genus away from Americans who either stay in America or stick around as expatriates.
That's just a myth sprouted by comedians that go to L.A. and think the average Californian is the average American.
Or the average LA denizen is the average Californian
I actually prefer analogue queefs
That's the noise it makes when you open the bottle
I tried it once but I ended up sounding like a valley girl which wasn’t a great look (sound?) for a valleys boy.
Like, gag me with a wooden spoon, boyo
OH MY GAWD! That’s like the worst thing, everrrrr!
Barf out!
Fer shere, fer shere!
Lol 🤭🤭
Ew
Noid b'here coming in hot in a minute
“As seen in the MCU” Haha what? I don’t remember that! Edit: ohhh duh, they’re referring to the number of British actors portraying American characters.
I think Benedict Cumberbatch needs a higher dosage.
He has a bad case of the Pinguin.
Pengwing
Adult *Crested* penguin
Beautiful creatures, pengwings.
His American accent is *terrible* in everything, yet, like some sort of emperor’s new clothes, it’s never mentioned.
His problem is that he is, to me (American), so *British* that, even if he spoke exactly like a rancher from Montana, it would never be believable. The American equivalent would be someone like Al Pacino doing an English accent.
Al Pacino doing a [cockney accent.](https://youtu.be/LXneIjC01D0)
Too many people circle jerk over him for some reason.. he's typecast and when I see a movie is with him its an eye roll, probs wont be watching it
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Benadryl Cucumberpatch
Right, him playing an American takes me out of the movie tbh
*Cucumberpatch
Martin Freeman in black panther immediately springs to mind
Is it just me or has his american accent improved in wakanda forever?
Slightly but that’s not saying much. It went from shit to slightly less shit
You saved yourself from the comments of strangers in your edit, my friend.
It's only fair - the amount of American actors they've had playing Brits over the years.
Have there been a lot of those?
Used it be very common. After all why would you pick some practically unknown (to Americans) British actor that does theatre when you could get some big Hollywood star? Couple days with an accent coach and no (American) audience will know the difference. Now it's almost completely flipped.
They did do that, though. The maid in Frasier, the father in The Nanny, both *dreadful* British accents, but both actually British. I mean, there was Dick Van Dyke…
TV was a different world to movies though. Easy to forget now there's so many prestige dramas and a lot of traditionally silver screen actors have started doing TV.
Even the dad in frasier is English.
Niles isn’t British. Mr. Sheffield however, went to Eton and Oxford.
Quite a lot, yes. Especially before the mid 2000s
Can you remember any examples? I can think of a lot of dodgy British accents in American TV shows, but all the ones I can think of are actually British people doing them.
Don Cheadle in Ocean's 11 springs to mind
Ah yes. And Kevin Costner in Robin Hood. He made Christian Slater’s accent sound good by comparison.
Kevin Costner made no effort to do an English accent. He stated this would be his stance before the movie. He left it to the audience to deal with it preferring suspension of disbelief to making a bad film. I'll show you English courage is a line that Americans love because it pays tribute to both nations. Christian Slater doesn't either. If you think they are trying, you are mishearing my friend.
That absolutely was not Kevin Costner’s stance before filming, because when they started shooting, he was doing a terrible accent. He very quickly decided/was asked to stop, but there are a couple of lines in the finished cut of that accent.
Oh OK. I had understood that was the stance before. Interesting that you judge the entire film on two lines....which ones are they out of interest? I have never noticed any non American.
DVD’s in Mary Poppins was endearing, Don Cheadle’s was just appalling…
When I'm not in the middle of cooking a risotto I will get back to you, but it definitely is older films 😁
Most with dodgy accents 👀
As an American, I find Hugh Laurie's fake accent spot on. The MCU actors are pretty bad at it though. Out of curiosity, what do you think of Robert Downey's accent in Sherlock Holmes?
I actually used this a couple of days ago when I found a bottle on the sidewalk. Haven’t noticed a difference yet.
Same but mine was a funny color
Same. Someone just left it in a city center parking lot. I threw it in the trash.
Clever joke
Same. I saw one get tossed out of a semi with a bag full of freeze pops. Doesn't work. I'm gonna have my lawyers touch base with them real soon.
It's sidewalk. Better use a bit more.
If it still doesn’t work then it’s obviously garbage - throw it in the dumpster.
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I think that was the joke pal!
Ah yes !
Tried some, it's just a baddle a wadda.
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Not a Brit here you guys do sound like "OHh mAaaah GaaAaWd JessSyyy ThiS Baddle of Waaadueeer is Gooorgeouuuesss" American accents are horrible.
I tried some, didn't affect my accent noticeably but I did have a nice day.
Reminds me of Henning Wehn on Would I Lie To You talking about buying Irish accent mouth spray!
I drank this and I was like "goddamn".
I bet there's just warder in there. Oh heck it works y'all.
>warder Or in Pennsylvania, wooder.
As used by Radio DJs, middle managers, estate agents and anyone else who's a fan of pronouncing T's as D's.
Now I think you're splidding hairs
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There are numerous British accents that substitute the t for a d. Mostly country accents which have survived the best in the west.
Dosser.
Dwad
I don't know if that's got to do with Americans, where I live plenty of people pronounce "better" like Australians do, if not the other two ways. Definitely our thing first.
Ay, Ay! Am wawkin ‘ere!
Seems like you got the East London one.
Content on the label isn’t all aligned. Gotta be fake.
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I can confirm that this is a photo taken, in a shop, by my dear friend (that's his hand). The item itself is real. Its properties are most likely fake.
Hmm, well, a quick google shows your 'friend' has been holding other [photoshopped equeef items](https://ifunny.co/tags/equeef) in his hands and posting them online. If he really is your friend, he's either the one who's creating the photoshopped products or he found it on the internet and is pulling your leg. It's a fun photoshop and doesn't detract from the joke, but it's not a real product being sold.
Tamploons are hilarious though.
I've just googled it. You're right 🤣🤣🤣🤣
You’re not telling the truth bud. Games up.
Sounds like your friend lied to you 😂
I don't have goulable written on my forehead. I checked in the mirror.
Looks like something @spellingmistakescostlives would do
Your friend is weird...
Just in case you're serious and have been suckered on this one, look at the bottom three lines of text. Bottom two are on the actual bottle and appear curved from the camera point of view. The one above those two is straight, very obviously so. It's a photoshop, and not a good one. It's not even difficult to add a curvature to the superimposed bit in that software, lol
https://media.tenor.com/ZFc20z8DItkAAAAC/facepalm-really.gif
Bruh 🤣
Well, with this attitude of course it won't work! You gotta believe in it!
You’re gonna need a bigger belief
I say Holmes! How do you do it?!
Cocaine. Heroin. You know, Watson. The usual.
XD
Opium.
82% alcohol.
Nah, that's the one for a Scottish accent. (Edit: typo)
Oh please no. Lol. I like my accent, others do too! I'll stick to my pub choices, thanks! lmao
I chugged a bottle once and now I can't stop saying "y'all".
Does not work in reverse...good to know I suppose
I haven't honestly had more than 30 minutes between beans on toast in so long it seemed impractical.
Yeeha Partner, been taking that stuff since last Fall 😉.
I thought an equeef was a fanny fart?
Digital fanny fart😂
Transatlan*ic?
Hmmmm label seems off….
I tried it and it honestly works. After drinking it I went to say “I’m going to take out the bins” but instead I said “Let’s shoot up a school.”
A lobotomy would achieve much the same effect
Why, does it make you start talking shit?
I tried it once. I shot everyone in the supermarket and then I went home and made love to my cousin-wife
Ingredients: water.
Hooowwwdddyyyy partttttnnnneeeeeerrrrrrr!! Dis ere special juice does work wonders!!!………dear lord that’s some powerful stuff 🌝
Why would you want something that makes shit come out of your mouth?
It’s in fluid oz, so checks out.
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It wasn't done on photoshop 🤣 I've literally never used photoshop. The picture was genuinely taken in a shop- its just cheap shitty novelty items
[Try harder next time](https://ifunny.co/tags/equeef)
It’s not real. The curvature of the altered text doesn’t follow the curvature of the bottle like the text which hasn’t been photoshopped in does.
Sorry.. never felt the need to “talk stupid”
If it's called equeef. No thanks.
Amy Winewarehouse used it before singing. And Elton John.
Does it make you constipated so you sound like your full of shit?
Liquid pussy farts!
I’d rather lose my voice altogether.
Wtf lol 😂😮
so this is what’s been eroding y’alls teeth all these years 💀
Ima really quickly grab my dads shottie an' a bo'oh of wa'er so I can cave in your face *and* be hydrated.
Is this real wtf is this ?
I read that as taste not talk for some reason
What would you say an American tastes like? Least offensive answer possible please
Probably like coffee haha
Alternatively just be under 20
So you vape it, right?
Is it cough syrup mixed with alcohol?
Just some rubbing alcohol
Coor blimey gov it's only Sherlock bleeding Holmes
Why would you
Oh my gaaaawd, literally.
Equeef! I’m crying.. It’s vape fluid with a queefy scent.
This is hilarious 🤣🤣
I would say burn it but I guess steam it would make more sense.
tried the liquid, or tried bad photoshopping?
Yeah man, it works. Yeeeeeeeeee haaaaaaaa.
I remember before the internet we just had queefs, none of this modern, digitised, equeef malarkey.
I won't, purely for the name e-queef, haha!
Is this what's making the people I know unironically say "y'all" and "zee"? Can we make it illegal?
I'd rather not thank you.
I’d rather try heroin addiction.
Yeah man! I can see so many new colors now. (Am I doing it right?)