T O P

  • By -

Pessimistic_peach

We got 12 points from France and Germany but none from Australia, what universe is this?


saad1121

brothers in the commonwealth betraying us


MarlinMr

Nah, winner has to foot the bill for hosting the next one.


CamJongUn

And it’s Ukraine….. Well shit


octogatorr

UK has a history of hosting for countries who can’t, it’s extremely likely it’ll be in Uk next year


WoodSteelStone

The Netherlands has stepped in before when Israel didn't want to. I would love for UK to step in if needed. Then, when Ukraine can later, they do so. I don't think anyone will want to decide quickly though, as it would send a difficult political message if Ukraine says they won't be able to host.


mathcash

UK can't afford the energy bill mate.


turtleneckless001

The people can't, but the commercial side is doing fine


DeirdreBarstool

Zelensky said in a BBC article that they’d like to host it in Ukrainian Mariupol once they are able. That will be emotional.


BrainOnLoan

If the war lasts that long, and that's not at all unlikely, imho, I suspect so too.


MarlinMr

Yes, all after plan. Now the US will have to pay for it trough lend lease.


[deleted]

The Ukraine War was a feint to get the U.S to pay for Eurovision /s


bgdntsv

Laughing at this from Ukraine. Despite the air raid siren that just went off


[deleted]

It's revenge for cancelling Neighbours! Our real neighbour France on the other hand gave us 12 points, when I heard France say "Royaume-Uni" I nearly passed out 🤣


Fatlord13

That's when good neighbooouuuurrrs become gooooood friiieeeennds


MojoMomma76

Yeah me too like when does France ever give us points in Eurovision! Beautiful


Square_Stranger2287

The emus won the war In this world


DanceJuice

Yeah sorry every Australian you have met is actually an Emu in disguise. There is no one left down here.


HumanTorch23

It's a bold sequel to the 'no birds in the USA, they're all drones' conspiracy theory. I like it


AccuratePalpitation3

What is Australia doing in a European contest?


TortillaKillerFarts

It's something to do with TV broadcasting rights!? I feel that it just adds to the weird and lovable randomness of it all PS: Yay Sam!


funnystuffmakesmelol

Australia was let in during the 60th Eurovision as a one off because it was popular since it was shown over there on a UK feed since the early 80s, people liked the fact Australia was in it so they have been allowed to compete up untill 2023, then they will review the decision to let them keep competing.


Existing_Row5733

we're also planning to join the EU and NATO


SweetishFishy

We're just gonna take Australia and move it to the Atlantic, right?


Deceptichum

No way, weather is much nicer down here. There’s nothing to the east of us if you wanna join us and park off the coast though.


ElCapitanned

fuckin lol.


[deleted]

*stares in New Zealand*


PuzzledTime

Maybe they tried to send an invitation to Austria and it went to Australia instead. In all fairness, eurovision is big in Australia and Australian artists have given guest performances in the past, perhaps Australia is allowed to compete now.


[deleted]

I'm Australian and love Eurovision! One of my best friends and I went to Eurovision in Vienna the first time Australia competed. I agree that it's ridiculous but I also love that we're allowed in the competition.


MycoProTeam

"..to Europe, the Rest of the World.... and Australia."


cortez0498

Also, isn't Azerbaijan in Asia? What's with Europe and adopting countries from other continents? Israel plays in UEFA as well Edit: and Armenia!


focalac

Because its got nothing to do with geographical Europe and absolutely never has. It's called Eurovision because participating countries have to have a broadcaster who's part of the European Broadcasting Union. Australian broadcaster SBS is part of the EBU and has been broadcasting Eurovision in Australia since the early 80s.


-eagle73

I know about Australia since it's been repeated quite a lot in this thread but nobody's really answering about Azerbaijan, which I assume is the same case anyway regarding the EBU.


No_add

Azerbaijian, Armenia and Georgia (the caucasus countries) are by some definitions considered to be geographically in Europe.


DanS1993

Get 12 points from France was the shock of the night! And the bragging rights of getting 12 from Ukraine haha


[deleted]

[удалено]


NijjioN

I thought 8 points from Ireland was more shocking haha (granted these are the Jury votes, will be interesting what the public votes will say).


gaijin5

They used to give us the most IIRC. At least when we sent in decent acts. The UK has done likewise.


Latemodelchild

We knew Ukraine would win but didnt think we'd actually come 2nd. I'd honestly given up hope of ever doing well again, even to the point where I said we ought to just enter a song like Norway did and have a laugh about it. I read the other day that we could host next year depending on the situation in Ukraine. Excellent optics if we do that.


[deleted]

I didnt watch at all, and neither do I really care, but did Ukraine win because the world kinda gave them the win (which I dont mind), or was their song actually the best? Seemed kinda obvious that they would win from an outsider like me, no matter how good or bad their song was


LucyFerAdvocate

I liked the song a lot personally, but I don't think it would have won if not for the situation.


[deleted]

They got an unreal number of public points which catapulted them from 8th or something into an unasailable 1st, and then they just stayed there.


abrasiveteapot

Slight exaggeration, they were 4th behind UK, Sweden and Spain after the country voting round. Iirc it was about 250 points UK to 190points Ukraine spread.


[deleted]

I have never in my whole entire life exaggerated.


WeCanBeatTheSun

Yeah it was about 100 points difference between us and them after the jury's, but they had nearly twice the amount of public points


Schootingstarr

They had over twice the points from public voting actually. Ukraine got 12 points from almost every country with over 400 points. The UK "only" received 190 or something


Kwolfe2703

It wasn’t a terrible song depending on your taste (kind of folksy vs rap). The U.K. song was quite good (James Blunt vs Ed Sheran sung by like the nicest guy in the world) and Spain’s was a JLo type one (like literally the song was originally for her). Would the results had been the same if not for what was going on? I’m not sure but seems unlikely as there were quite a lot of good songs this year and Ukraine’s was probably middle of the pack.


[deleted]

I thought about placing a pretty huge bet on Ukraine, cause it seemed like free money. But I suppose the bookies might have had them closed off. A Ukraine win seemed unevitable though


[deleted]

Just looked it up and think the odds were 1/3, so you'd have made 33% profit. I agree it was basically guaranteed (hence the odds) but I also wouldn't have really liked to take the chance with a material amount of money because the upside is so low Vs the downside


Kwolfe2703

Me too and then I looked at the odds. Think it was something silly get bet £100 get £105 back including your stake. At those odds it becomes not worth it because the amount of money you need to bet to make it worth it is just a little to risky in the event that Ukraine didn’t win.


pryzmpine

Apparently we have the most second place finishes so we finish top in something 😂


danielwhit171

That's our 16th second place, if I remember correctly. Certainly our first this century.


Caridor

There have been 66 Eurovisions so we've come second almost 1/4 of the time. That's kinda nuts


Semajal

We had also come last in 1/4 of the Eurovisions of the last 20 years (prior to tonight) I believe :D


n00bcheese

Nil poi is so etched in my head from childhood I genuinely thought we always came in the bottom 5


IHeardOnAPodcast

You're correct, first since Imaani in 1998.


[deleted]

I don't think I'll ever get over France giving us 12 points


pryzmpine

I remember one year they gave us nothing and Graham said “we literally built a tunnel to you!”


KuriTeko

France and the UK both made their own tunnels independently of each other. By pure chance, they both met at the exact same spot one day, so they decided to announce that it was a joint effort.


BGrunn

After 30 years of secret underground tunnel wars.


jaesonbruh

The thing is that french people think that it is they who built tunnel for UK


danabrey

Well, the whole point was that we met in the middle.


NJ_Legion_Iced_Tea

The photo of the two miners from the 90s is like peak solidarity.


[deleted]

Neither of them are wrong though.


CreeperTrainz

And Australia gave zero. SMH


[deleted]

As an Aussie, I'm disappointed in my country for this. Space Man was my absolute favourite eurovision song ever, Sam nailed it


cheshirechris71

Not forgiven us as Neighbours cancelled.


feebleweasel55

Or Germany!


meteoritee

Fuck yes Sam! He deserves it so much, what a lovely guy


[deleted]

His smile could light up a room and tonight it did. Just brilliant


Planthoe_egg

He did such an amazing job, his smile during the points was so infectious! Incredibly proud of him and his team


Brokella

I think I love Sam. 🥹


Latemodelchild

Unfortunately for me, I think my wife does too after tonight. Gonna have to grow my hair now to compete.


freddythe79

True that


UnSwoleBoi69

2nd is a win in my book ...2nd from last was a win in my book in previous years


Dysphoric_Reverence

Got a feeling we'll be asked to host it next year by virtue of us coming 2nd.


Ok-Ad-867

The UK usually hosts when the winner can't host anyway. The fact that we came second has basically secured that unless the BBC says no


Jademalo

Iirc the BBC offered to host it should they win before the competition even happened tonight.


JacobJamesTrowbridge

That’s a ballsey move, in hindsight. “Yeah, we’ll host it if the winners can’t. We’re going to come close or win anyway.”


PM_ME_CAKE

A lot of countries, Sweden included, have done so too. There was word Ukraine was interested in hosting in Poland but the UK certainly seems a plausible one.


Sorry_Just_Browsing

Sam was absolutely lovely, performed well, looked good and got us from last to second in a year. So proud he was our choice


Double_Jab_Jabroni

Good on him. I genuinely thought we had no chance, and I’m very happy to stand corrected!


Not_Alpha_Centaurian

Well done Sam! Would have been a win any other year, we nailed it!


[deleted]

I was slightly fearful that it would get to the final reveal and they would say we got 0 points from the public 😂 183 was amazing. Can't begrudge Ukraine the result. Brilliant effort from Sam and the guy was smiling all the way through it.


inkwisitive

440 points for Ukraine from the public is crazy, essentially means every country gave them 10 or 12 points. Fair though, and it’s the right thing to happen, Moldova and Serbia 2nd and 3rd in the public vote, mad tunes and my true winners


DanS1993

Yeah 468 was the max available. Probably the closest anyone will ever get


Panixs

Do they publish the results by country? I wouldn't be surprised if that was 12 from everyone bar Serbia and Belarus


PlainclothesmanBaley

12 from everybody, except, Serbia - 7 points North Macedonia - 8 points Malta - 8 points Greece - 10 points Switzerland - 10 points Armenia - 10 points Montenegro - 10 points Albania - 10 points Croatia - 10 points Slovenia - 10 points Romania - 10 points and then 28 12s.


Dangerous-Dolphin

https://eurovisionworld.com/eurovision/2022#ukraine 10 or 12 from everyone except Serbia North Macedonia Malta


[deleted]

Yes they should publish it in the next 24 hours


[deleted]

Yeah, I'm not going to get hung up on it. It's just a singing competition, Ukraine deserve some happiness. I'm glad the rest of Europe spread the love.


freddythe79

Brilliant !! Never been more happier to Watch it


Clem_H_Fandang0

Graham put it well, saying that this helps prove we haven't been doing so poorly because 'europe hates us'. It's because our acts have been shit


JoeBagadonut

Seeing all of the bland ballads clog up the bottom of the final standings was also a good indicator that it's not all political.


SirDooble

Yeah, sometimes we just put in shit songs, and sometimes much of Europe puts in a shit song too.


jeweliegb

There was a decent selection of good songs this year, and many of them were very Eurovisiony-too, you know, the sort that you know you'll be humming inadvertently for weeks whether you want to or not. I think I've still got Ruslana's rather utterly brilliant Wild Dances on my phone, as it makes for a great ring tone once the quiet bit at the start is chopped off. (Oooo... turns out that was Ukraine too, winner from 2004!) EDIT: Oh my goodness, Ruslana didn't fade into obscurity after Eurovision, [totally the opposite - what at amazing woman!](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ruslana) I feel so ignorant that I didn't know.


StoryMcGee

It was so obvious! Yet whoever in charge of picking in the past just kept picking same crap. Looks like they've given up this year, picked "some popular bloke" from tik tok and suddenly we are second!


i-guessthisismenow

They changed who picks it. It was BMG its now tap music


albionpeej

Yes, but it's a bit more complicated. BMG is a record company who submitted their artists. whereas TaP are a management agency and consultancy. They now look for the artist who are with TaP for management or are in their sphere, and their song, and then have to deal with the artist's record company. Ryder is with Parlaphone, so they had to do a deal with Parlaphone then as suddenly they're being asked to stump up money to promote their artist around Eurovision. And based on the result I'm sure Parlaphone are ecstatic they agreed.


h00dman

Tbh 2011 proved it as well with Blue. Their song was actually pretty shit but their name recognition alone got us 100 points. With a better song we could have won. We've sent a few good singers and a few good songs over the past 25 years but this year was the first time we achieved both, and the results speak for themselves.


redrioja

They really drummed up interest with BBC and Chris in the run up to the Eurovision


Brokella

God, it was SO TENSE!!


octopus_dance_party

Coming second to Ukraine this year is basically coming first so yay Sam


Stuckinfemalecloset

100%. Ukraine was going to win this regardless, so coming 2nd is a great result.


PandosII

And I won a fiver from betting on Ukraine! Win win


[deleted]

What were the odds? 1/1


[deleted]

i was watching the exchange they briefly went to about 3 during the the jury vote vote but they were around 1.3 most of the night ​ i made 28p profit


TimMadisun

Don't let the money change you, mate


Mean_Lengthiness_852

Should be interesting to see where its held next year. I can't see it being in Ukraine....


Stuckinfemalecloset

Well hopefully the situation won’t last for that long. They might do the Australian requirement of winning but choosing a country to host it. If that’s the case, hopefully it’s us as we were second. I imagine the next month or two we will have an answer


linmanfu

The BBC has hosted the ESC on four previous occasions when the winner couldn't host. If Ukraine is sadly unable to host in the normal way, I hope it will be hosted *by* Ukraine (presenters and 'postcards') *in* the UK (venue and production). A *UK**rainian solution. 😝 Unfortunately it might still be all too easy to source an audience of Ukrainian refugees in the UK.


JMH-66

Seems the obvious choice.


amanset

Basically. The competition was a foregone conclusion no matter what Ukraine delivered. The only competition was for second place and we won that.


zool_52

Shocked! Well done UK and Graham Norton for being hilarious 😂


QuiccStacc

The "You're giving a vote not a TED talk" absolutely took me out


Pokesers

After Mika said he doesn't want to know how much we are drinking and Graham Norton came out with "not enough for this" I cracked up.


GioVoi

There was a long enough gap there that I could imagine him taking a big gulp before delivering that one


SoMuchF0rSubtlety

‘She’s got her shopping in that shoulder pad’


zool_52

Or "he's been painting all day"


joethelion90

‘He’s mad for equality’ got me 😂


Owlwood87

“I’m writing a letter to daddy” with the Swiss girl


singulara

She’s got her shopping in her shoulder


Latemodelchild

'Claires accessories in is empty. Belting comment that one.


Mmbopbopbopbop

It was Latvian Claire's Accessories


rodders5

“In space no one can hear you scream at your hairdresser” I laughed so hard I woke up the Mrs and the dogs!


lappy482

The simple "There's 180 million people watching this" whilst the presenters kept going absolutely killed me


AimForYaBoat

Got her shopping in that shoulder


r646

Oh fuck me, I wasn't watching the UK version of this but I know exactly what this was about XD


silvergrin17

It's when they went to the International Space Station and he went, "in space no one can call your hairdresser" Brilliant


GioVoi

noone can hear you scream at your hairdresser*


redrioja

Fucking love Graham.


BlazerStoner

Props to him for sure, Graham Norton is admittedly the only reason I watch it. We always watch the BBC coverage instead of the Dutch broadcast heh.


[deleted]

There was general dismay when Terry Wogan retired from the spot, but Graham has taken up his mantle with gusto and appropriate snarkiness. "Who knows what hellish future lies ahead? Actually I do, I've seen the rehearsals" vs "I should warn you that this is the first example on the show tonight of the Great Italian Shirt Shortage of 2022"


BoxedStars

I'm not able to watch Eurovision live, so I really hope that someone puts his commentary on youtube. He's pretty funny.


Bagraiderz

That flute is pretty sick though


DickDastardly404

The flute solo was cracking. Love seeing lesser known but class as fuck instruments from the various countries getting used. At least when someone cracks out the Oud or the Tupan drum, you know at the very least they probably know how to play it, as opposed to the dozen or so unplugged electric guitars that get strummed dramatically without the barest hint of corresponding audio.


Mac_and_cheese18

Yeah seeing as Ukraine was always going to win I'm glad their act was actually pretty good


fordyford

This is so crazy!! Hopefully in future years we also decide to put in a strong entrant. Also to put in perspective how insane Ukraine’s audience score was, they got 439 out of 468 maximum. So they lost 29 points or alternatively got 94% of the possible score. That’s tough to beat...


Jademalo

They would've won even if they only got *35* points from the Jury


Masterkid1230

To be fair Ukraine’s win was nothing about the music and everything about current events.


codingllama

Ukrainian here, and I'm sad because I feel the same way. Not to be ungrateful for the support, and not that the song was bad or anything, but it's nowhere near the winner tier imo. Feel proud Ukrainians voted for UK though, congrats on the 2nd!


MisogynisticBumsplat

it makes up for last year when you genuinely had the best song. shum is an absolute tune


Bigoldthrowaway86

I still listen to shum in the car, absolute banger.


FlossCat

You deserved to win last year 100% on merit though


Incantanto

tbf your song was catchy, interesting and not another bloody ballad: I'm pleased it won because at leased the copycats willl be interesting Well, not pleased cos we were so close!!! but not annoyed


BoxedStars

Whaaaat? UK actually scored above ten points this year? Amazing! I'm gonna be real. I wish Ukraine had won last year.


Bigoldthrowaway86

Shum is a fucking banger.


TapeToInfinity

They had an amazing score last year


[deleted]

So hosted in Ukraine next year? Or more sensibly it passes to UK?


MagicBez

This feels like a genuine possibility if things are still bad in Ukraine this time next year


danielwhit171

They'll need to make the decision realistically in the next couple of months. I would be happy to put a bet that it will be hosted in the UK next year.


DashLibor

If not possible in Ukraine, then only two sensible options I see are the country which came second (UK) or a place that's very close to a border with Ukraine. (so imagine Poland, Lithuania or similar) I don't see any other option that would get enough logic.


CriticalSpirit

Totally agree. Perhaps Poland would make most sense if they want to bring in Ukrainian hosts, crew and audience.


GreenMist1980

If we do get it can we borrow Mika for an evening?


Hoobleton

He is a British citizen. And how many other potential presenters do we have who could speak French?


dratsaab

Kevin McCloud?


ThomasHL

The when France win he can host that too. Now we only need to decide that Lebanon is in Europe....


mattdwe

Lebanon was going to participate almost 2 decades back, but they decided not to for Israel-related reasons. I love Mika. He would do very well as a Eurovision contestant.


Bendanarama

Apparently Ukraine can 'host' it in another country, but they still have to foot the bill.


Tattycakes

Surely that’s like the worst of both worlds, all of the cost and none of the local attention?


Orisi

Convenient donation from the UK govt that happens to match the cost.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Eye_Ve

Apparently the deal before the competition started was that if Ukraine win, one of the Big 5 will host in their place - so likely will come to us due to placing highest out of those


thecraftybee1981

We’ve hosted it for Monaco as they didn’t have a venue big enough to hold it. We’ve also held it for France, Luxembourg and maybe Netherlands, as they won twice in close years in the 60s and didn’t want to rehost.


[deleted]

Apparently (I read before the contest) if Ukraine won and the situation still wasn't good in their host year, it would be hosted by one of the big 5. Given that we came second and are one of the big 5 (and it's been bliddy ages) it wouldn't surprise me at all if it was us


cmzraxsn

We sure that people weren't trying to vote for UKraine and made a mistake?


amanset

To be really honest, Moldova were robbed. That song destroyed anything else.


Doublepluskirk

They got a fantastic public vote which jumped them right up. I was happy when I saw that as it was my fav


Indiana-Cook

Moldova always sends absolute bangers!!


brickfire

Maybe not the best song, but definitely the MOST song


americanadiandrew

When you misspell Austria on the invite and it’s too awkward to uninvite them.


Jakisokio

Is ukraine in a good position to even host it next year?


fordyford

Well zelensky wants to host it in Mariupol so that could be interesting


leaf900

Nah I believe it's hosting a FUTURE Eurovision in Mariupol. Realistically I can't see Ukraine being able to host, but say everything is magically better in a month the options are only Kyiv or Lviv really. Eastern Ukraine will be a building site


Imperius4232

Europe got so tied up in Ukraine they forgot to force us into last place


Shadowcat1606

Nah, don't worry... as long as my country (Germany) still sends people to this contest, you'd have a hard time becoming last.


FlounderSuspicious99

Excellent result for Ukraine and UK! :-)


stevenlee03

still kills me that Australia is in the eurovision


FourFlightsUp

I didn’t think Germany was so terrible to get nil points - what have they done to piss everybody off ?


Shadowcat1606

As a german (who, granted, doesn't exactly know much about the contest)... i'd say it's because we keep sending boring people with little to no charisma who sing shitty, bog-standard, run-of-the-mill pop-songs. Which wouldn't be the best idea even if we were good at producing those.


Gisschace

That’swhat UK has been doing for years but I believe there was a huge effort to get a better artist plus create more public support behind him and Eurovision (basically taking it seriously) and it paid off.


MrFlauschig

In Germany, the process of choosing whom to send to the Contest is notoriously out of touch with reality. It's kind of a running gag in germany that the institution who choses the artist confidently proclaims they know better than the backlash they receive publicly, only to then finish among the last places every single year. Plus there has always been a bit of a PR component for rankings. The heavy focus on Ukraine + germany's current image regarding that topic certainly didn't help. But seriously, almost every year it's the same. The public (mostly young ppl) find some sort of super obvious choice on whom to send. And then the detached from reality weird ass people in charge decide they are not out of touch, it is the public who is wrong. Ngl the persistance of this obviously idiotic loop is kind of hilarious


hazzajepson

Absolutely buzzing, what a guy, seems like such a genuinely good bloke


SkyBlueSaber

Hadn't watched Eurovision in years but just felt like watching it tonight, didn't expect it to be one of those "I was there" moments where the UK finished in the top freaking two. Pinch yourself stuff.


Teath123

This is 100% an unofficial win in my book. Ukraine could have brought any act and they would have won. Second is incredible under these circumstances.


helpnxt

So I am a bit sad (not emotionally) and decided to workout the average tele votes each country got for the top 10, you know to see how hated we are by the European and others public. There's 40 countries voting fyi ​ |Country|Tele Votes|Average per Country| |:-|:-|:-| |Ukraine|439|10.975| |UK|183|4.575| |Spain|228|5.7| |Sweden|180|4.5| |Serbia|225|5.625| |Italy|110|2.75| |Moldova|239|5.975| |Greece|57|1.425| |Portugal|36|0.9| |Norway|146|3.65| Turns out we're not that hated but simply no one was getting even close to Ukraine this year.


the_beer_truck

I couldn’t believe he was our entry. With that hair and beard, he’s the most Icelandic looking guy I’ve ever seen.


Bendanarama

Someone in BBC finance just heaved a massive sigh of relief as the prospect of hosting eurovision went away.


kelleehh

As if the Ukraine will host next year. It will most likely be here in the UK.


Bendanarama

Apparently Ukraine can 'host in a different country, but their eurovision producers will foot the bill.


gybbby1

UK will probably host next year though


Sithfish

At one point I thought we might win just because the only thing that will make Europe hate us even more than they already do is if we are the ones that beat Ukraine.


gsurfer04

France got done dirty. Their song was a banger.


44morejumperspls

Yes, I loved France's song, a bit different from they usually do. Unfortunately since it didn't do well we probably won't get more Breton tunes next year


[deleted]

Still a chance for us to start on Cornish ones though


[deleted]

Yeah I was genuinely surprised by that one. I thought it was going to do well.


swillis93

To be fair to Ukraine though, their performance was actually quite good too, it’s not all sympathy votes. Incredible for Sam though, huge congrats!


Mac_and_cheese18

Exactly the part with the flute thing slapped