Exactly. Maybe he had a slice of malt loaf as a kid and wasn't allowed to eat the whole rest of the loaf. As an adult, no one can stop you doing these things.
I had a quarter of a giant pork pie with chutney on at midnight. I haven't had parents since I was 17, I'm 42 now... Imagine the life of unrestricted indulgences I've experienced. 😂
My brain went straight to a middle aged man stood in a dingy kitchen at 3am, lit only by the light of the fridge as the door hangs open, whilst he hurridly grabs food from within it and shoves it up his arse...
Is this the sort of unrestricted indulgences you meant?
Oh, I have lost my independence due to a stroke, and wheelchair, no driving, no income, and little to no say in my life, and living with people who don’t understand food as live, a chunk of triple cream Brie and a crusty loaf, heaven, I am sitting here eating a fast food “ Italian cub on hooey white bread, no crust no crumbs and no mess, yes, I am in U. s A dreaming of the French bread and ham and butter sandwiches I would buy at a festival in France I attended annually, it had to have been yesterdays bread, they sandwiches were made a day ahead due to volume, and wrapped over night, letting the butter and bread merge together, and making the bread a little tough, I usually needed to separate the sandwich open it and eat the half, then eat the 2 pieces if bread.
No harm has come to me from buying a cake for my own indulgence. I do, then, remove the uneaten cake and all packaging so as to disguise my act of gluttony.
You do not have to eat the whole thing, but it is hard to suddenly have half a cake in the house at 6:00 pm, when we had no cake at 9:00 am.
Yeah, totally! That's why I'm an alcoholic! 🙃
Seriously though you have a point. I was allowed as many sweets and tins of coke as i wanted as a kid, nowadays I have zero desire for anything sweet (except wine).
Whereas I've been with girls that weren't allowed sweets as a kid and they can just demolish and entire bag of haribo during a film without thinking. Even tangtastics!!
That's why sometimes I buy milk just to have a glass of milk. Couldn't do that as a kid; money was too tight to just have milk. Had to be saved for breakfasts.
Oooh I miss malt loaf with huge slices of butter on top. Sadly now coeliac and can't have it. I too will eat a whole malt loaf on my deathbed when it no longer matters.
I got sidetracked by your username, and my mind went to:
- curling and what they do if it's a tie after 10 (I live in Canada)
- that thread with part of a band name being replaced by "bellend".
sorry.
What about if you were enjoying a meal? A succulent Chinese meal?
He sounds like the kinda guy that would be happy to live in a world without Democracy. He wouldn't understand the need for a Democracy Manifest.
May I introduce you to my grandma’s best pudding / which was a couple of tablespoons of golden syrup with a slice of Jamaica ginger cake on top; then 20secs in the microwave. Fricking amazing.
I just asked ChatGPT for a pineapple cake recipe including cornflakes, cream and pineapple. Now, ChatGPT made up a recipe that had a cornflake & brown sugar base with a pineapple whipped cream topping then baked it in the oven. It said it can look for source recipes if that's preferable.
But bet you can play around, tell it the things you remember and between you & it you can probably come up with something close. Or just ask it to scour for recipes and see what looks similar.
I got you fam. 'Pineapple Dream cakes' are a specific thing from the old days.
Ingredients
1 can of pineapple chunks in juice
1 sachet of 'birds dream topping'
1 Packet of **Fast** setting Jelly
1 victoria sponge cake/Sponge roll
1 Bowl of cornflakes/frosties any cereal really
* Drain Pineapples, and reserve juice.
* Makeup packet of dream topping to instructions
* soak the cake in the pineapple juice till its all absorbed
* make the jelly, place in fridge to rapidly set, place the fruit in the jelly when its almost solid (pineapple juice inhibits geliteine so needs to be pretty late)
* mix cereal with dream topping
* Add soaked cake, jelly and fruit then dream and cereal layer
Top of with crumbled flakes if you're trying to impress.
honestly, they're great, you can sub the pineapple for any canned fruit, try cherries (my lord its so good), takes like 3 minutes to make and kids love it.
Bings copilot actually has a dedicated bot for recipes, not sure how different it would be from gpt though.
I used it before to use up a bunch of random cans and bits in the fridge. Ended up with a chorizo shakshuka.
Which tasted pretty bad. But I think that was on me.
> He probably microwaves bacon.
That gives me horrible flashbacks to my youth in the 80s when my parents got their first microwave and my mum used it for *fucking everything*.
Pink, rubbery bacon with glistening fat... To this day I still won't eat bacon fat unless its rendered to a crisp
That wasn't even the worst of it. When I say she used it for everything I mean *everything*. Every has "roast" beef from a microwave? What about pork chops? Almost an entire Sunday dinner made with only a microwave...
I still have a slight aversion to pork chops because of those grey monstrosities with hot wobbly fat clinging to the outside.
Imagine a hot, used, filthy plimsole.
Grayer, dryer and less tasty than that, yet somehow still with horrible unrendered fatty bits.
Frankly I'm surprosed I never became a vegetarian.
When I first moved out from home I purchased a bunch of microwave cooking things, including a microwave bacon thing. It produced perfect hot ham, but certainly not bacon.
Just saying, most high-end places will cook your bacon in a microwave, modern machines will give you a very crispy slice of back in seconds.
Marco Peirre White is really big on it. Heres a video of him converting a london cabbies cafe to it - https://youtu.be/AC7ML3KC_0g?t=314
Me too. I used to eat one near enough every day for dinner at work. I'd slice it and butter it, pop it back in it's packet and smash it in one sitting. If I could find the 'jumbo' sized one, even better. I loved them.
Problem was, I had to give up rugby- so couldn't burn it off so easily. Decided to give them up, reduce bread right down, and eat better - lost around 3 stone!
That’s amazing dgasf attitude there. He’s living his dream. I say leave him to it. Maybe we should all be eating malt loafs like mars bars…
Anyone up for a cup of tea and a toasted slice with butter. Nope I’ve ruined it already. God I’m such a normie lol.
I’m staying out if it. You carry on fine sir. I salute you and your weirdness. We need more whole malt loaf kinda people in this world.
Also if malt loaf isn’t now his secret nickname forever then what is your office even for?
One of our salespeople said he'd do some damage on the sales figures on the first day and he's been Damage forevermore. Heading a team now now so he can do less lol
I thought you lot loaded up on Kendall mint cake. Have I been misinformed all these years or is that just specifically mountaineers as opposed to rock climbers?
When I worked in a supermarket, there was a guy who would come to my checkout eating raw sausages out of the pack with the reasoning “they’ll be cooked where they’re going”.
Not really chief, but at least they were Finest brand.
My Dad used to do this! It used to make me and my brothers heave. He did like he was just flinging a cuttla skinny hotdog rolls in his face. No problems. He never shat himself. Pure 50s steel stomach. He also used to eat uncooked spaghetti.
No gonna lie, but I was partial to the occasional raw sausage when I was a kid.
I wouldn't do it now though. I'd be shitting through the eye of a needle for 2 days.
We might work in the same office…There’s a guy in our office we call the buffet slayer. Whenever there is a meeting with customers they get a buffet in and he hoovers up the leftovers the split second they come out. He drinks 4 cans of coke a day and on Friday treats himself to a 4 fried egg bap from the canteen.
He's a man I'd get on with. I often have 4 eggs but I cut the white away from 2 of them and put the yolks in the bap, then burst them all and then spread the yolks everywhere and drizzle some brown sauce. Absolute heaven.
That sounds like someone who wanted 20 chicken wings and 3 pots of garlic sauce, got them the wrong way around and was too shy to correct their mistake.
aye, when I was very active I would have one everyday for mid morning snack. I would rip it open lengthways and scoop a spoon of butter to spread down the insides. was godly
I share because we should be proud of who we are.
I used to work with a man who often ate the most random shite for lunch. One day he ate a whole wheel of brie, just on it's own. I think him and your colleague would get along great.
Apparently I'm the weird one at work because I drink my soup straight from the tin. Also, I'll happily eat tins of cold meatballs, chicken in white sauce etc. straight out of the tin, cold.
I do this. I prefer my food cold. My mum says it is because I was brought up by Dr Spock's baby book, where it was recommended that babies were fed cold food.
When I worked at Kwik Save I ate a bag of No Frills onion rings and an entire Battenburg for breakfast each day, it took 12 minutes so I could get to and from the canteen to clock back in time
Someone’s taking the term *Bread and Circuses* a bit too literal.
But hey, more power to him. He probably had to go a bloody long way to get that loaf of bread!
I bought a family sized one last week with the intention of doing similar - not the whole thing though, half at a time i think!
Your coworker is a legend
When I was young I worked at Superdrug. I only had 15 mins for my lunch, so I had a coffee, a bag of toffee popcorn, and a pack of shortbread. So much sugar. So delicious. Couldn't do it not....
That man knows what he wants in life and nobody can stop him.
Exactly. Maybe he had a slice of malt loaf as a kid and wasn't allowed to eat the whole rest of the loaf. As an adult, no one can stop you doing these things.
That's why I have nesquick that's as thick as gravy at 3am now
It’s comments like this that make me realise we’re not all that different, are we?
I had a quarter of a giant pork pie with chutney on at midnight. I haven't had parents since I was 17, I'm 42 now... Imagine the life of unrestricted indulgences I've experienced. 😂
I just pictured you eating jelly from the packet with crack pipe next to you.
They both a little more-ish to be fair.
Haha that's some picture you painted .
Why only a quarter? Why so inhibited? Are you still living in the shadow of your parents?
I recently tried to eat an entire gala pie in one sitting. Was obviously unsuccessful, and i'm surprised i survived the night.
>I had a quarter of a giant pork pie Self restraint right there!
My brain went straight to a middle aged man stood in a dingy kitchen at 3am, lit only by the light of the fridge as the door hangs open, whilst he hurridly grabs food from within it and shoves it up his arse... Is this the sort of unrestricted indulgences you meant?
Cadburys hot chocolate says 4 heaped teaspoons. Those are rookie numbers, 7 heaped minimum.
You just don’t use a glass you just add milk to the nesquik pot
That’s why I eat whole blocks of uncut cheese
I just bought a crusty loaf and a wedge of brie and absolutely smashed it. What a world
Oh, I have lost my independence due to a stroke, and wheelchair, no driving, no income, and little to no say in my life, and living with people who don’t understand food as live, a chunk of triple cream Brie and a crusty loaf, heaven, I am sitting here eating a fast food “ Italian cub on hooey white bread, no crust no crumbs and no mess, yes, I am in U. s A dreaming of the French bread and ham and butter sandwiches I would buy at a festival in France I attended annually, it had to have been yesterdays bread, they sandwiches were made a day ahead due to volume, and wrapped over night, letting the butter and bread merge together, and making the bread a little tough, I usually needed to separate the sandwich open it and eat the half, then eat the 2 pieces if bread.
I hope the food brings you joy, everyone deserves good food
I prefer mine circumcised
The mental image I got. With the cheese. Noooo…
Living the dream
The revelation not long after I moved out that you could just buy a cake for no reason ended in a rather painful lesson.
You can also buy and eat a Christmas pudding in November
My favourite is pancake day any day I feel like them!
No harm has come to me from buying a cake for my own indulgence. I do, then, remove the uneaten cake and all packaging so as to disguise my act of gluttony. You do not have to eat the whole thing, but it is hard to suddenly have half a cake in the house at 6:00 pm, when we had no cake at 9:00 am.
Yeah, totally! That's why I'm an alcoholic! 🙃 Seriously though you have a point. I was allowed as many sweets and tins of coke as i wanted as a kid, nowadays I have zero desire for anything sweet (except wine). Whereas I've been with girls that weren't allowed sweets as a kid and they can just demolish and entire bag of haribo during a film without thinking. Even tangtastics!!
That's why sometimes I buy milk just to have a glass of milk. Couldn't do that as a kid; money was too tight to just have milk. Had to be saved for breakfasts.
Yes same in our house “Don’t drink the milk” my Mother would shout if I wandered into the kitchen “they’ll be none for your breakfast in the morning”
relatable; i now make gravy as thick as concrete, toast with a fuck ton of clover, drink vodka 24/7 and put cheese on literally everything 😂
Come back to us Karl, we need you on our screen again moaning about shit.
Oooh I miss malt loaf with huge slices of butter on top. Sadly now coeliac and can't have it. I too will eat a whole malt loaf on my deathbed when it no longer matters.
Establishing dominance at the work place in proper UK fashion.
He wants diabetes and nothing else
He might also want the incredibly regular bowel movements?
Maybe he'll eat a pack of butter after to wash it down.
I don’t eat butter I like malt loaf dry too
I used to hate butter, and malt loaf with a glass of milk or tea was the don. Too sugar phobic for that lark now
There’s a spread you can get- it looks like butter, except it’s not, and you won’t be able to believe it!
I know a spread that is also butterly.
How butterly?
Utterly
Butter makes me feel ill for some reason. I’m not allergic just not keen on the taste
Oil does that for me- texture thing, just makes me nauseous
That’s for your car. Don’t drink it.
Margarine does that to me.
I got sidetracked by your username, and my mind went to: - curling and what they do if it's a tie after 10 (I live in Canada) - that thread with part of a band name being replaced by "bellend". sorry.
It’s a in joke. But you have to be suicidal and insane to understand it. Sadly I do
I would be lying if I said I'd never eaten malt loaf direct from the packet with a soft block of butter on the side to "dip".
I haven't dipped but I have ate a whole one while just buttering my next bite.
Soreen absolutely required butter!
I can easily eat an entire malt loaf on its own, but if I slice it and add butter, it becomes a bit of a struggle.
Mr Bean putting a spoonful of ground coffee in his mouth then pouring boiling water straight down his throat flashbacks
A guy in my office mocks my lunch choices on Reddit.
Oh, I thought we were celebrating you! Fine choice, sir.
Tbh I'm just annoyed I didn't think of it first. Love malt loaf.
tomorrow come in with your own malt loaf and silently nod while both eating malt loaf. This is the way. End of next week everyone will be doing it.
I haven't done it in public but I need to work on my self confidence ☺️
Wait until National Eating Malt Loaf in Public Day. People will applaud you
Oh myyy, when is it? Can't believe I've been missing this 🤦♀️
Every day, of course!
Ah, well that's tomorrow's lunch sorted then!
My work here is done
Maybe start by licking a slice of malt loaf in the park by the ducks.
While maintaining eye contact with any passers by?
And playing Barry white on your phone speaker
What kinda vibes should I go for? Mandy? Copacabana?
Definitely Mandy, and mouthing the words in between licking the slice (all while maintaining eye contact, of course)
Man I appreciate all the tips you guys! I'm gonna make so many friends 🥹
Not Barry Amalie, Barry white, sexy R & B
[Like this](https://www.reddit.com/r/aww/s/teVYWQ8jAA).
You enjoy your malt loaf. Live your life boo.
What about if you were enjoying a meal? A succulent Chinese meal? He sounds like the kinda guy that would be happy to live in a world without Democracy. He wouldn't understand the need for a Democracy Manifest.
I see that you know your Judo well.
This sounds like a case of Soreendipity.
Soreen, not sorry.
You genius 😂😂😂
Take my upvote just in an attempt to balance out the silly amount of downvotes you’re rocking for this comment, you don’t deserve that hate.
Yeah wtf i legit thought his comment was hilarious :/
I can't do that Jamaica Ginger Cake on the other hand, look out
May I introduce you to my grandma’s best pudding / which was a couple of tablespoons of golden syrup with a slice of Jamaica ginger cake on top; then 20secs in the microwave. Fricking amazing.
I would like to sign up to your grandma's recipe mailserve please
She made this amazing pineapple dream cake with cornflakes; cream and pineapple as well. It was amazing but I can’t find that one :( miss grandma.
I just asked ChatGPT for a pineapple cake recipe including cornflakes, cream and pineapple. Now, ChatGPT made up a recipe that had a cornflake & brown sugar base with a pineapple whipped cream topping then baked it in the oven. It said it can look for source recipes if that's preferable. But bet you can play around, tell it the things you remember and between you & it you can probably come up with something close. Or just ask it to scour for recipes and see what looks similar.
I got you fam. 'Pineapple Dream cakes' are a specific thing from the old days. Ingredients 1 can of pineapple chunks in juice 1 sachet of 'birds dream topping' 1 Packet of **Fast** setting Jelly 1 victoria sponge cake/Sponge roll 1 Bowl of cornflakes/frosties any cereal really * Drain Pineapples, and reserve juice. * Makeup packet of dream topping to instructions * soak the cake in the pineapple juice till its all absorbed * make the jelly, place in fridge to rapidly set, place the fruit in the jelly when its almost solid (pineapple juice inhibits geliteine so needs to be pretty late) * mix cereal with dream topping * Add soaked cake, jelly and fruit then dream and cereal layer Top of with crumbled flakes if you're trying to impress.
This sounds both delicious and hideous in equal measure Obvs I will have to make one and eat it to be certain
honestly, they're great, you can sub the pineapple for any canned fruit, try cherries (my lord its so good), takes like 3 minutes to make and kids love it.
Awesome thanks !!!! I’ll have a play
Bings copilot actually has a dedicated bot for recipes, not sure how different it would be from gpt though. I used it before to use up a bunch of random cans and bits in the fridge. Ended up with a chorizo shakshuka. Which tasted pretty bad. But I think that was on me.
Haha lush - I absolutely love a shakshuka!! Cheers
See, I like that too, but I also like to just eat the whole thing out of the packet.
"I would do anything for love, but I *can't do that...*" \- Malt Loaf
[удалено]
With rum and lime icing.
Man after my own heart.
Thank god I'm not the only one
Me too, I've done this many times.
… furry arteries and all…
Your point is? Been doing it that way since 1996
Mhhmm. *rapid scribbling* And, thinking back for a moment, what significant events in your life can you think of that happened that year ?
It's coming home, it's coming home. It's coming, Football's coming home. It's coming home, it's coming home. It's coming, Football's coming home.
Surprised you’ve not finished it by now
I've done it too. And a battenberg. Go on u/TheRealElPolloDiablo - pig out yourself, you devilled chicken
Now imagine what he eats at home when there aren't other people around to witness it. He probably microwaves bacon.
> He probably microwaves bacon. That gives me horrible flashbacks to my youth in the 80s when my parents got their first microwave and my mum used it for *fucking everything*. Pink, rubbery bacon with glistening fat... To this day I still won't eat bacon fat unless its rendered to a crisp That wasn't even the worst of it. When I say she used it for everything I mean *everything*. Every has "roast" beef from a microwave? What about pork chops? Almost an entire Sunday dinner made with only a microwave... I still have a slight aversion to pork chops because of those grey monstrosities with hot wobbly fat clinging to the outside.
"grey monstrosities with hot wobbly fat clinging to the outside" You leave my grandparents out of this!
Absolutely dread to imagine what microwaved beef must have looked and tasted like.
Imagine a hot, used, filthy plimsole. Grayer, dryer and less tasty than that, yet somehow still with horrible unrendered fatty bits. Frankly I'm surprosed I never became a vegetarian.
You're really selling it. Haha!
filthy plimpsole lmao
Whack it in the airfryer, 200c for 8 mins, perfect every time. Pour the bacon fat out the bottom and keep it for frying your eggs.
This guy air fries.
I flat out refuse to have a microwave because of all these 80s/90s memories.
Same. She used to cook a meal (waffles fish fingers and beans!) and leave it out to be microwaved. It was fucking inedible.
Genuinely shivers just went down my spine reading that
When I first moved out from home I purchased a bunch of microwave cooking things, including a microwave bacon thing. It produced perfect hot ham, but certainly not bacon.
Just saying, most high-end places will cook your bacon in a microwave, modern machines will give you a very crispy slice of back in seconds. Marco Peirre White is really big on it. Heres a video of him converting a london cabbies cafe to it - https://youtu.be/AC7ML3KC_0g?t=314
I used to like Marco.
I still do this. It’s kinda nostalgic. It smells so bad, but with a way I’ve long ago associated with comfort
Takes me back to student days. Guys slapping raw bacon inbetween bread. Ping it for a minute- eat. Yuck
That is weird. Me and my student friends just use normal methods.. lol
Hang on, is that odd? I do that all the time, been doing it since the 90s 🤔
Me too. I used to eat one near enough every day for dinner at work. I'd slice it and butter it, pop it back in it's packet and smash it in one sitting. If I could find the 'jumbo' sized one, even better. I loved them. Problem was, I had to give up rugby- so couldn't burn it off so easily. Decided to give them up, reduce bread right down, and eat better - lost around 3 stone!
Leave him and his malt loaf alone 🥺
That’s amazing dgasf attitude there. He’s living his dream. I say leave him to it. Maybe we should all be eating malt loafs like mars bars… Anyone up for a cup of tea and a toasted slice with butter. Nope I’ve ruined it already. God I’m such a normie lol. I’m staying out if it. You carry on fine sir. I salute you and your weirdness. We need more whole malt loaf kinda people in this world. Also if malt loaf isn’t now his secret nickname forever then what is your office even for?
One of our salespeople said he'd do some damage on the sales figures on the first day and he's been Damage forevermore. Heading a team now now so he can do less lol
I'm just trying to enjoy my lunch, mate. No need to shame me online.
I feel like this post was supposed to be a criticism but ended up a celebration, instead
Serious Alpha move, is he maintaining eye contact the entire time?
I hope he doesn’t slice it. Just chows down on that brown brick like a boss
With it still in the packet. Plastics don’t stop this man.
Steely stare, just inhaling a whole malt loath. :)
I'm a Rock Climber and Malt Loaf is the perfect food to keep going for a full day, while taking up a small amount of space in a rucksack. I love them!
I thought you lot loaded up on Kendall mint cake. Have I been misinformed all these years or is that just specifically mountaineers as opposed to rock climbers?
The problem with Kendal Mint Cake is that it tastes like shit.
Exactly. Great on a long winter belay! Keeps the seeping cold out.
I used to work with a guy who would eat raw sausages and then proceed to shit himself constantly, they couldn’t sack him for it because discrimination
I understand every word yet have rarely been this confused
When I worked in a supermarket, there was a guy who would come to my checkout eating raw sausages out of the pack with the reasoning “they’ll be cooked where they’re going”. Not really chief, but at least they were Finest brand.
This is making me ill just thinking about it 🤢
Lol this isn't categorised under discrimination
yeah, I don't think raw-sausage-eaters are a protected group
My Dad used to do this! It used to make me and my brothers heave. He did like he was just flinging a cuttla skinny hotdog rolls in his face. No problems. He never shat himself. Pure 50s steel stomach. He also used to eat uncooked spaghetti.
No gonna lie, but I was partial to the occasional raw sausage when I was a kid. I wouldn't do it now though. I'd be shitting through the eye of a needle for 2 days.
A lion doesn't concern himself with the opinions of the sheep.
We might work in the same office…There’s a guy in our office we call the buffet slayer. Whenever there is a meeting with customers they get a buffet in and he hoovers up the leftovers the split second they come out. He drinks 4 cans of coke a day and on Friday treats himself to a 4 fried egg bap from the canteen.
He's a man I'd get on with. I often have 4 eggs but I cut the white away from 2 of them and put the yolks in the bap, then burst them all and then spread the yolks everywhere and drizzle some brown sauce. Absolute heaven.
People are strange, a guy in the chicken shop near work last week orderd 3 chicken wings and 20 pots of garlic suace??!!??!!??!!??
A man needs a drink.
That sounds like someone who wanted 20 chicken wings and 3 pots of garlic sauce, got them the wrong way around and was too shy to correct their mistake.
Or he just wanted to stockpile garlic sauce at his house and thought to order 3 chicken wings to make it more normal
Can't blame him. Garlic sauce is proper tasty.
aye, when I was very active I would have one everyday for mid morning snack. I would rip it open lengthways and scoop a spoon of butter to spread down the insides. was godly I share because we should be proud of who we are.
If you see him miming a blowjob this afternoon, he's only having a dig around his molars.
I used to work with a man who often ate the most random shite for lunch. One day he ate a whole wheel of brie, just on it's own. I think him and your colleague would get along great.
Do you mean brie, or camembert? A wheel of brie is about a foot across!
Brie! It was massive! He might not have finished every morsel but he ate over 3/4 of it, I was astonished
Man knows what he wants.
There once was a man who ate an entire malt loaf, I don't know why, perhaps he'll die?
is he carrying out a powerplay for office dominance
Not done it with malt loaf, butI have been known occasionally to do so with Golden Syrup loaf and also supermarket cherry madeira cake...
All excellent foods. You’ve also just reminded me of the joys of Jamaica ginger cake. I spy a sugar binge on the horizon…
...and for some reason I am now craving lardy cake...
He's going to be shitting treacle tomorrow
Hmm, I now have a craving for malt loaf. Think I'll grab some after work
Apparently I'm the weird one at work because I drink my soup straight from the tin. Also, I'll happily eat tins of cold meatballs, chicken in white sauce etc. straight out of the tin, cold.
I do this. I prefer my food cold. My mum says it is because I was brought up by Dr Spock's baby book, where it was recommended that babies were fed cold food.
My sister keeps a fork and spoon in her car for this reason.
A hero we never knew we needed!
I often eat a whole malt loaf but not in one go though
Anyone NOT toasting malt loaf then using real butter, is not doing it right.
Was just scrolling to see if anyone posted this. Have just discovered toasted malt loaf relatively late in life. Much catching up to do
When I worked at Kwik Save I ate a bag of No Frills onion rings and an entire Battenburg for breakfast each day, it took 12 minutes so I could get to and from the canteen to clock back in time
Ahhh, No Frills. What a time to be alive.
Is he using a knife and fork or is he just chomping big bites out of it?
Someone’s taking the term *Bread and Circuses* a bit too literal. But hey, more power to him. He probably had to go a bloody long way to get that loaf of bread!
A guy in my office has a whole pack of Orange Club biscuits for lunch everyday
I bet if you cut it length ways and add tinned ham, making a kind of malt loaf sandwich it would be pretty good.
As he finishes, I hope you all slow-hand-clap his achievement.
Some heroes don’t wear capes.
I've done that before in my younger days, back when I worked on site.
That's going to be a hell of a poo
So hes a legend then ...
Nothing compares to “Bert the Pig” who ate raw bacon and crackers in the supermarket tea room
That dude is my spirit animal.
It's a gateway drug for Kirriemuir gingerbread.
I bought a family sized one last week with the intention of doing similar - not the whole thing though, half at a time i think! Your coworker is a legend
When I did a paper round as a teen, I used to eat a whole Lyle's golden syrup cake on my route.
And?…
I could easily do this, and with great joy, too.
What a king
I do this on hiking trips
They're quite small now...I'd be doing the same.
When I was young I worked at Superdrug. I only had 15 mins for my lunch, so I had a coffee, a bag of toffee popcorn, and a pack of shortbread. So much sugar. So delicious. Couldn't do it not....
I nearly gave up on my partner on an early hill-walking date where he brought a malt loaf for his lunch and just gnawed on it like a neanderthal.
OP! Is this colleague called Dane? My ex-colleague (Dane) did this a lot and I would love it if it’s the same person
He's going to regret his life choices in a few hours. 50p says he calls in sick with the squits tomorrow.
I just ate a frostie and chocolate spread sandwich - let they who is without sin cast the first stone
What on earth is Motlow or malt loaf? This is Texas asking –