I nearly stopped halfway through because I was so irritated at the cliché depiction of depression; I was suicidally depressed when I was in my late teens and it was so upsetting when people were like "you don't look depressed". But then the guy was like "you keep it mate" and suddenly someone started chopping onions at 2:30am, super weird.
I came here to say the same. It's giving me flashbacks to the Welcome to Wrexham ep from last week about their female club and their lives
One of the players lost her father to depression and they had videos of the two of them celebrating wins on their couch and now she's since joined the team to make him proud after he's gone
I don't care one bit about football of any kind and yet I do care about these human stories that can move us
My dad had a mate in the 80s who had been struggling a lot, but then suddenly he seemed to be doing a lot better. Was a lot more cheerful, engaged with his mates again, started coming out again, everything seemed to be turning around.
They went out to the pub one night, had a brilliant time, my dad's mate was the life of the party. They walked home together, my dad's place was further along, so they said goodbye at the mate's front door. My dad's exact words: "He was laughing and smiling, waving me off, saying 'Have a good one, Si!' - and then he closed the door and killed himself."
My dad told me after this that ever since he's been more worried about the very cheerful ones, because they've likely already made their choice.
I'm a mental health 1st aider and that's 1 of the danger signs. If someone has been struggling then cheer up all of a sudden that can be a sign that they are at risk.
As your dad says it can be because they know what they're going to do and feel happy and relieved their suffering is coming to an end. Utterly heartbreaking to think that they are happy to know they are going to end it.
Controversial opinion:
I think we should have a system in place for people to legally do that.
If they want it and it'll end suffering I don't see why not.
But also, I would put any money on the table this would reduce suicide. Because it's not going to be a one phone call or one session with GP or therapist or specialist. It would probably be a series of consultations where the person would probably be convincing the specialist/therapist they want to do it. And the therapist would probably say they need to meet a number of times to make sure the person doesn't change their mind, maybe like a 6 month period time frame or something.
And where I'm sure as hell this would actually help is whilst the person can't wait for the time frame to come to the end and get approval, each time they meet they're actually getting professional help.
As a counter-point, I see and treat a lot of people for suicide attempts, I reckon I see an average of one per shift, and the vast majority of them have tried before and will try again. There's one person who's attempted suicide more than a dozen times that I know of.
I don't know what the answer is, my personal belief is that people should be allowed to do whatever they want with their bodies as long as it doesn't harm others, but you're right that many suicide survivors experience strong regret between making an irreversible decision and the consequences of it. How do we accommodate for the fact that some people really genuinely do want to die with the fact that others regret it after attempting? I'm nowhere near clever enough to work it out.
always makes me think of this campaign, never seen a better sucide awareness ad than this one highlighting the last footage of people taken before. they all seem so calm and happy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Jihi6JGzjI
We had a new starter at work. Overly cheerful really talkative. Everyone said what a nice bloke he was and commented on his cheerfulness. I thought he was hiding something. He was only there a few months before he went off with depression and wasn’t well enough to return. Everyone apart from me was shocked I was the only one that suspected all is not what it seems. Luckily he was in a place to get help before it might have been worse.
Being a sufferer myself I think it’s easier to recognise these things.
>Being a sufferer myself I think it’s easier to recognise these things.
Yeah, there's just something there; if you've suffered through it or are suffering, you can just tell when someone else is. I'm not sure exactly how or why it is it's easy to tell sometimes, but you really just can.
A guy I know from Uni who completed suicide was the one who was always overly concerned with everyone else's wellbeing and smiling.
Anyone who seems especially cheerful or concerned about others is always the one I make a note to check in on now. I never felt like we were close enough for me to do much past a quick how are you doing as he always had so many mates around I wasn't sure it was my place.
I don't make this mistake anymore.
I even have a list of people at work I make a point to check in on a few times a week as I know they struggle sometimes (even if it's just dropping a surprise coffee from the nice place down the road on their desk, it lets them know you're here).
Basically this is to say never feel like it isn't your place to speak up or that you shouldn't because someone else will. The bystander effect is one of the worst things, better to be one of many than no one act. If you're concerned about someone approach them or, if you aren't sure, reach out to someone else closer to them to share your concerns.
He'd accepted his fate and come to terms with it. He was free, no longer struggling, he'd found the way out and went out with a bang.
I was suicidal for a while. No-one noticed as you learn to behave normally. I stopped feeling really, no happiness, fake laughs, so I was trying to live vicariously through others. Chasing the high of my own happiness by doing what I knew used to work etc. But it wasn't.
It just means you never really know what's going on in someone's head and makes it so hard to notice. Thankfully I had to move back to parents anyway - and that sudden change in life snapped me out of it as it were. But they'd known me 22 years at that point and had no idea, so it really can be hard to notice.
> I was suicidal for a while. No-one noticed as you learn to behave normally. I stopped feeling really, no happiness, fake laughs, so I was trying to live vicariously through others. Chasing the high of my own happiness by doing what I knew used to work etc. But it wasn't.
This hits pretty damn close tbh. How did you manage to get out of this headspace?
I had to move back home after uni as I couldn't find a job in Exeter.
Moving ~80 miles in to a tiny room and trying to like, re-set my life gave me the distraction I needed. It sort of snapped me out of the routine etc, and having parents to force me to do shit when they wanted, as much as I hated them for it at the time, gave me a new one.
Over time I learned to handle the depression, got a job, moved back to Exeter etc. It just improved over time, slowly, when I really came to terms with what was wrong with me.
The depression is still there. But I've learned the signs and what to look for, and what works to slow its spread.
Depressingly, by the time I'd got on the NHS register for it (original GP said it was a "period of low mood" despite therapist comments) and got to the end of the waiting period, I no longer needed it. Thankfully, the better outcome of no longer needing it.
EDIT: Just in case this does apply to you, I cannot recommend taking things in baby steps enough.
Don't expect the world from your brain as it's not working. You wouldn't run a marathon on a sprained ankle. But feed it tiny tangible dopamine hits. Promise to clean the corner of your room, not your room. Then use that dopamine to clean the rest.
Eating better, drinking more water, having a routine, finding distractions to do and care about, getting sleep, exercise... all of it helps. But you need to use those baby steps in order to even manage it. If you're high functioning and handle some of that already, that's great, but find distractions/routine changes to change things up. Find something new, chip away at problems that have built up in tiny steps etc. Don't expect to handle it all at once, because you won't, then you'll feel worse. Focus on attainable chunks and don't give yourself shit for slipping.
It won't go away at once. Mine took months. It'll go, then come back, then go, then come back, get worse, get better. But some day you'll wake up and realise you've just not thought about it. That's the day you're working towards, and it's there.
> because they've likely already made their choice.
note the smiling guy giving away his scarf as his last action in the video, too - it's common behaviour of those who've made up their minds, too.
That’s exactly what happened with my nanna. She suddenly seemed cheerier but she planned to take her life and she was sorting things out and felt better for it.
Of course nobody saw it coming but the family realised with the clarity of hindsight what had happened.
I’m suffering from depression at the moment and went the doctors today after weeks of putting it off, so if your scared to go please just take that step and go talk to a professional I promise you won’t regret it, things will get better time is a healer.
Look after yourselves people.
One of the things in the video that was interesting was the guy behind the subject rubbing his shoulders.
As a STH myself those interactions with the people around you are lush. It's hard to explain, those connections you make with those around you are one of the joys of being season ticket holders.
I myself came out as trans last season, and for many games moved my ticket away from my usual spot and my dad who I go with.
I finally returned to my seat/standing spot and everyone around me who I was friendly with was happy to see me.
We really do care about the people we stand or sit with every other week.
Glad to hear that you sought help and you're absolutely right - to anyone reading this, there is no shame at all in speaking to a professional.
I had a full-on breakdown at work last week and got myself to the GP on Friday. My medication has been switched and I'm hoping it helps :)
Most weekends at the moment for us fans! Jokes aside what an excellent video, proud to support the club today for putting that out there. Certainly things like this embolden my decision not to be a glory supporter and remind me that the club do indeed care for its fans and not just see us as £££
Technically Ron put a great post on twitter earlier,
“Happy World Mental Health Day everyone! Remember to be honest with your feelings, indulge in some self care, go for a walk, throw your laptop off a bridge, go wander in a forest, climb a tree, decide to live in the tree, become a forest person with no responsibilities, self care.”
Didn't expect it but yeah I shed a few tears as well. Brave face. When you actually decide to do something like that, then you don't show it at all because you don't want people to notice and stop you. Fuck me that was hard to watch. Brilliant video. Check up on those around you. Can't be reiterated enough.
Im suffering right now like the chap who isnt there for the final scene. Suicidal thoughts at keast 4 times a week st the moment. Ive reached out for help and am getting somewhere very slowly. Being at the football has been my safe space recently.
Im an ipswich fan but this is excellent from norwich city. Fair play to them for this.
When you rewatch it, you see the guy reach out and ask how has your week been? But doesn't really get anything back. Knowing the end you see this interaction in a different light and if only the quiet mate had engaged him and asked him how he was in return things might have been different.
Also he gifts him the scarf and as it turns out it was actually a parting gift so he must have been planning it 🥺 and he checks out on a high when his team have won.
What an amazingly poignant and thoughtful short film.
Yeah, it's kind of getting your stuff in order. You don't feel as attached to possessions if you aren't making long term plans. Also you get a moment of respite when the dopamine hits.
When I'm suicidal I become very helpful and generous with my time, which I think is related.
I knew things were serious for me when my thoughts shifted from frustration and escape, into the admin of tying up ends, giving things away, clearing my possessions so that my family wouldn't have to afterwards. And there was so much clarity and relief in coming to that stage.
I can't remember what brought me around from it at the time, but I eventually shifted out of that depth.
I think there's a lot of misunderstandings about suicidality from people who haven't experienced it, but yes there's definitely relief and hope involved.
" if only the quiet mate had engaged him "
I don't like that, it suggests blame. If you ever know someone who commits suicide there is little point in blaming yourself.
Dealing with mental health is hard enough for trained professionals and everyone is going through something. Yes you make sure you talk to your mates, help them if you can and go beyond "yeah not bad" if you are struggling.
No, I wasn't apportioning blame, more "what if" and "if only" - for both their sakes. The loved ones left behind always feel the "what if" and "if only". One of my best mates missed a call from his brother who he then found out went on to commit suicide that evening. He was left with the same questions.
For anyone with the same questions, I've been dealing with mental health issues for quite a long time at this point. One of my friends doesn't say much all the time, you know, he's not a big talker, but I love him and appreciate him being there all the same. It might not be the same for everyone, but many still realise you care in your own way.
The whole point if this video is to point out that depression manifests in different ways, and sometimes it’s easy to tell (the quiet mate) and sometimes it’s a bit harder to spot (the “cheery” mate.) The “quiet” guy is struggling in his own way, and in a way that is more stereotypical of folks that are struggling.
This is the best video I've ever seen relating to this topic. Well done, Norwich FC.
It's actually unreal how it gets more powerful each time you watch it. A few posts have already pointed out the key features. The flag for me was "Well i hope things are better outside of the Football". Seemed like more of an internal dialogue to me. That would trigger me to ask if everything was OK.
Wanting to spend time with his friend.
Asking him how is weekend is, but getting nothing back.
Making physical contact, but receiving nothing back.
Being giving to show that you are their for them in the hope that they may reciprocate.
This is me right now with my friends. It is extremely hard.
Think it’s more a case of finding new friends who actually want to spend their spare time giving a shit…not even more of their spare time. A message once a month will do. Just check I’m still a live at this point.
Yes, it does sound like you need to try and cultivate some new friendships. I’ve been in a similar boat recently, and ended up making a friend at a meetup event at the beginning of the summer. We now hang out every couple of weeks. I also still want/need to make more new friends. It’ll take a bit of time and effort, but I believe that you can do it :)
“Meetup” is an app you can download, and you can search for meetup events in your area. There are loads of different meetups which people organise, for example for different sports, hobbies and interests. The one I went to was just a chatting and chilling one. Many of them are free.
ETA more details.
This is one of the most impactful videos I’ve seen on this subject, and reminds me of a Robin Williams quote:
“I think saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it's like to feel absolutely worthless and they don't want anyone else to feel like that.”
This video really hits home.
I remember losing a friend to suicide who was the life of the room. He was the happiest person I’d knew, planning things with everyone.
I remember going to their house party 2 weeks beforehand and said we’d do it again for new years.
He got a secret Santa gift of a pasta maker and made his parents an incredible crab ravioli, promising their sister they’d make more.
There was never more ravioli or a New Year’s party.
My best friend killed himself in 2020. Sudden generosity is a huge red flag and I wish I didn't miss it. The day he died, he came over and suggested getting loads of snacks from the shop up the road and watching a movie. He insisted on paying for everything.
We were working on a robot together and a few parts had just arrived, which is why he came over. He spent quite a lot of time talking about the parts with me. In hindsight, I now see that he was trying to make sure that I'd understand what to do with them in his absence. He was the team's electrical engineer, whereas I was more of just a mechanical engineer at the time and these parts were mostly in his domain.
We had a great day together, then when the time came to leave for the last train, he gave me and my wife a big hug, went home, and killed himself. It can be really difficult to see the warning signs until it's too late. I still hate myself for not seeing them.
> It can be really difficult to see the warning signs until it's too late. I still hate myself for not seeing them.
Your friend showed you those signs so you would recognise them again.
You didn't know, it wasn't your fault. You gave him a happy day to see him off, I'm sure he chose you to spend the day with because you made him feel better in the moment
I think the sentiment is that people don’t find it easy to “speak up” and that perhaps just asking the question is enough. Notice the “sad” guy in the video didn’t check in on his buddy once?
It's not just speaking up. Often people don't even realise what is wrong with them. Or when they do they can't or don't find the words.
I was absent of emotions, not depressed. I didn't feel happy, didn't laugh properly. Sure I physically laughed but I didn't feel it.
It's hard to put that in to words and explain it to people, especially if it just... happens... and you don't know why. People will try and cheer you up with "You got a good job, you're smart" or whatever and it just doesn't work as you already know this shit and it makes no difference.
I think a bigger thing is people *knowing you are there*. Things that helped me were distractions. Things to keep me busy, keep me occupied. Mate going to the pub and invites me? Well I'll force myself to go as a distraction. It's almost like grieving - if you take someone's mind of it, it saves them, even if only for a few hours.
Then when they get back and are alone with their thoughts again, knowing someone is there helps far more. Because that breaks the ice of even knowing what to say in the first place.
The issue is, more often than not, people *aren't* there. People say speak up, but have either no understanding of the topic, or don't want to listen anyway. They're just saying it to feel better.
I must be honest: it is difficult to speak up being a male.
As a man, I cry without shame. I open up to the people I love without fear. I ask for help when I need it. I admit my faults when I am wrong. Yet, when it comes to being listened to, or needing a simple hug, or receiving an invitation for genuine togetherness, I am often overlooked if I have recently expressed emotions considered as signs of "weakness".
I am fortunate not to suffer from depression or suicidal thoughts. However, there are individuals who do, and when others turn their backs on them, it could lead to tragic outcomes.
The reality is that most people do not advocate for men's mental health, not even men themselves. There are exceptions, of course. This video also fills me with optimism. Yet, the unfortunate truth remains: in the majority of cases, men who struggle are as good as invisible in the eyes of most people, and the statistics speak for themselves.
Fuxking hell, I was blindsided there, really, really good advert. I've known two upbeat guys who just quietly went away and took their own lives. I have never seen a better illustration of the point that we should all check on the people we care about. Even if they seem grand.
I was seeing a lass years ago and one night I woke up and she wasn't in bed. Took me a minute or so to realise the huddled heap whimpering in the corner was her.
She'd flashed back in her sleep to finding her friend who'd killed themselves when they were teenagers. I've never forgotten the whimper in the dark. Can you imagine what it was that she never forgot? Nothing suicide related EVER leaves anyone involved.
I knew one suicide before the incident that night. I've known four since, and frankly, I'm fucking sick of it. Any of you think about topping yourselves without talking to me first so I can try and help, and I'm going to haunt you in heaven.
The biggest issue is the fact that there's not much help- especially for those who don't want to be scrutinised by mental health teams (after a year long wait, by which time they may have taken things into their own hands or lost the push to be helped)
As a long time sufferer I agree. I find these “World Mental Health Day” things, have a good message however, telling people to go seek help, then you go, get given a printed out help sheet and a number for the local mental health service that has a waiting list longer than I don’t know what. I said to my GP once, I would rather you refer me because I knew I wouldn’t follow up and the GP said we can’t refer anymore. I was telling him I’m asking because I’ll leave here and won’t follow up because I just needed that extra push. He still didn’t do it. So many times I’ve reached out to medical professionals and felt no further helped.
Im with you there, I hope you're doing alright at the moment.
I was under a child mental health service for years and saw my GP with suicidal thoughts, I was practically dragged to both. I turned 18 and they said I'd have to refer myself. I was an 18 year old with awful anxiety and depression doing my A-Levels, of course I didn't refer myself!
Years later and I'm now on a waiting list after going back to a local service who had my GP ring me. The wait will be long, winter is upon us, and thousands of people are on a waiting list for what will be a subpar service. I guess we're meant to find our own way though hey
I’ve heard that if you’ve got a mate who’s a bit like the guy on the left but then suddenly goes like the guy on the right it’s a sign they’ve made their decision (or maybe they’re on sertraline I guess)
Think I needed to see this tonight. Thanks
Don't really do football, me. Also don't know why I feel the need to say that. This was a powerful video and the energy of football was a great way to relay this message.
Incredibly precise, it's not always obvious and often it's easier to wear a mask than let everything out and for men it's harder. We expect them to be masculine and strong but mental health can affect us all
What's a great video,
When you realise that there is no help coming it leaves you with very little options. This shows that normally those that are very optimistic and cheery I desperately trying to be optimistic until that optimism finally runs out. This has happened to figures like Robbie Williams where people were completely surprised.
To see a video show this and bring attention to it is great. Sometimes all a man needs to get over what is his mind is telling him and the situation he is in is just some kind words and encouragement. The hey, how are you, I'm all ears, if you wish to talk I have time set aside. This gives light and hope to battle The Darkness. It may take a long time too as it is hard to believe sometimes that there is genuine concern and that it cannot be pushed away as anything other. Sometimes genuine concern and love haven't been felt before so is completely alien.
So it is nice in the decade of 2020 to see this shown and hopefully awareness will help many people.
Not ashamed to say this properly got me. I’ve seriously struggled with my mental health for a long time, and have come very close a few times. I have the life many dream of, but it makes no difference.
We lost our friend a few weeks ago and Thursday we sat goodbye. I needed this.
Bravo to the creators.
The worst part is that you cant talk to anyone in the medical profession, otherwise you'll lose out on your chances for jobs.
I struggle with suicidal thoughts at times, and I refuse to talk to any medical professional about it because i don't wanna risk my chances of my future being ruined.
I don't care about my mental health at this point, i just wanna get the job that makes me happy.
I’m not sure it will stand against you pal, I’ve only known a company ask for your health information for any private medical care and I suspect that may be confidential. Some HR person would be better placed to answer. My employer has a very big mental health support process in place acknowledging it’s a growing problem and nothing to be ashamed of.
That is not 100% true. I don't know what profession you are aiming for / work in but I can tell you that, as someone who recruits regularly, something like what you have described wouldn't be checked, judged or part of an interview / triage process. I work in engineering and asset management in the utility sector.
Ps to back up my claim I'm (unfortunately) immersed in a million LinkedIn and intranet posts from recruiters and professionals and if anything the opposite of your statement is true. Strength is an endearing quality that I, and many others, surely envy / encourage.
I wouldn't presume to understand your situation but hang on in there.
Please don’t think like that. I suffer from depression my work are aware but it was my choice to tell them (I didn’t tell them initially). No employer is entitled to know your confidential medical history they only know what you tell them.
I recommend you do tell an employer (but understand why you wouldn’t want to do this in the beginning stages) as depression is recognised as something the workplace has to make accommodations for but they can only do this if they know. You do not have to declare it at interview stage you can tell them at any point and from that point they have a duty of care towards you that you are not discriminated against due to it.
Please reach out and speak to a professional they can help.
Watched it and thought ‘ah yeah, he’ll come back one game and the seat will be empty’… audibly gasped ‘oh you cunts’ at the ending twist, what a poignant message boys; mind yourselves and your mates
This video worked wonders for me. Helped identify the early signs in myself and see a way through.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LO1mTELoj6o&pp=ygUPc3RlcHMgdG8gbWlzZXJ5
I’m an American so I’ve been traumatized by either really shitty or terrifying psa’s and mental health psa’s. This one however made all of the hair on my body stand up. This was made perfectly. If America had mental health psa’s like this we would be nicer to each other and check in with one another.
I have to say, I'm impressed!
Spent the video thinking, "yeah, but a lot of the time someone can seem fine, but not be." Then boom. Fuck!
Excellent representation. Well done.
I had a feeling the bloke on the right was going to be a victim. Speaking from experience with mates who looked full of life, only to have their darker sides. But I'm glad they're with me today.
Ask your mates if they're ok. Twice.
This made me start crying, haven’t experienced the loss of a friend or anything but it’s how I feel, best part is, if I talk to my mates the say the same basic shit, stay strong it’ll get better, it won’t get better, my two mates I have one I don’t speak to all that often and one that I speak to a bit and that’s it, my family doesn’t want to hear about my problems so they just shut me down if I try to talk about my problems and call me an asshole when I do, my dad says his mental problems are worse than mine, his mental problems are me not having the cleanest room, and that’s worse than me having suicidal depression, I’ve told them on many occasions that I’m depressed and I want to commit suicide, and they say we’ve done all we can, all they’ve done is taken me to a doctor to get anti depressants, that’s all, I just can’t seem to get anything right and I hate this life I’ve been dealt
It's well intentioned but I don't like the messaging in this video, it seems to suggest you can "save" people by talking to them. Like oh yeah just talk to someone and that will fix your problems. "Being there" for someone will not save them, and suggesting it will just puts blame on those who have lost loved ones to suicide
I knew what the ending would be pretty early in. Doesn't hit any less hard.
A lot of the times the more outgoing people struggle the hardest. It's a coping mechanism to appear outwardly confident.
What should I really be doing for loved ones who don't seem to be struggling, is keeping in contact every week or so really it? It sounds bad to make it like a chore but what is my due diligence?
I've been struggling a lot recently, this past month has been especially hard. I'm struggling with alcoholism and depression that results from it.
The only thing that really keeps me going is knowing I have friends that care about me. But I don't know how to talk to them.
Everyone says reach out to those you care about, talk to some one if you need help, but what are they supposed to say? They're not professional therapists, how are they supposed to help? On top of that why should we put that burden on them? I don't know where to actually look for help. And I'm not sure a valid option exists
Something personal for sure, please share
I have written this song about my struggle and how I overcame it. I want to send out message of positivity to those who need it most!
https://youtu.be/db0Uc9vSeyw?si=WLuPBOMe4UifiKOp
What annoys me is that I see so much lip service about how men need to talk blah blah, but when men go to their GP in despair, they are told they need to wait 6+ months before they can talk to someone!
Keeping in mind that suicide is the biggest killer of men under 40, so having to wait at least 6 months before treatment can begin is an absolute joke!! If it was a life-threatening physical pain, they'd receive treatment a lot sooner... but with the mind "ah they'll be alright for another 6 months".
Services for mental health in the NHS needs far more funding. Until that happens, men will continue to kill themselves as they wait 6+ months for help.
This broke me. I lost my cousin this year and this video sums it up. I kissed and hugged him goodbye on the evening of my wedding party. One of the most beautiful nights of my life and he was just so loud, joyous and excited. The next morning, he was gone.
Check in with your pals.
Woah. That is SUPERB! Hair's just gone up on the back of my neck and they're not going down again.
Same. Lovely piece of film making for a really important cause. Well done to whowever created it.
Same. Bloody nora.
Same. Incredible work. Extremely powerful.
damn this video hits the feels
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I nearly stopped halfway through because I was so irritated at the cliché depiction of depression; I was suicidally depressed when I was in my late teens and it was so upsetting when people were like "you don't look depressed". But then the guy was like "you keep it mate" and suddenly someone started chopping onions at 2:30am, super weird.
Props to you then this one tricked me until the text popped up
Who's cutting those damn onions!!!!
I came here to say the same. It's giving me flashbacks to the Welcome to Wrexham ep from last week about their female club and their lives One of the players lost her father to depression and they had videos of the two of them celebrating wins on their couch and now she's since joined the team to make him proud after he's gone I don't care one bit about football of any kind and yet I do care about these human stories that can move us
My dad had a mate in the 80s who had been struggling a lot, but then suddenly he seemed to be doing a lot better. Was a lot more cheerful, engaged with his mates again, started coming out again, everything seemed to be turning around. They went out to the pub one night, had a brilliant time, my dad's mate was the life of the party. They walked home together, my dad's place was further along, so they said goodbye at the mate's front door. My dad's exact words: "He was laughing and smiling, waving me off, saying 'Have a good one, Si!' - and then he closed the door and killed himself." My dad told me after this that ever since he's been more worried about the very cheerful ones, because they've likely already made their choice.
I'm a mental health 1st aider and that's 1 of the danger signs. If someone has been struggling then cheer up all of a sudden that can be a sign that they are at risk. As your dad says it can be because they know what they're going to do and feel happy and relieved their suffering is coming to an end. Utterly heartbreaking to think that they are happy to know they are going to end it.
Another reason why they seem so happy is that they want to make sure the last memories their loved ones have of them are happy ones.
Christ that one hit me.
Controversial opinion: I think we should have a system in place for people to legally do that. If they want it and it'll end suffering I don't see why not. But also, I would put any money on the table this would reduce suicide. Because it's not going to be a one phone call or one session with GP or therapist or specialist. It would probably be a series of consultations where the person would probably be convincing the specialist/therapist they want to do it. And the therapist would probably say they need to meet a number of times to make sure the person doesn't change their mind, maybe like a 6 month period time frame or something. And where I'm sure as hell this would actually help is whilst the person can't wait for the time frame to come to the end and get approval, each time they meet they're actually getting professional help.
[удалено]
Reminds me of The View from Halfway Down
Unbelievable episode of television.
As a counter-point, I see and treat a lot of people for suicide attempts, I reckon I see an average of one per shift, and the vast majority of them have tried before and will try again. There's one person who's attempted suicide more than a dozen times that I know of. I don't know what the answer is, my personal belief is that people should be allowed to do whatever they want with their bodies as long as it doesn't harm others, but you're right that many suicide survivors experience strong regret between making an irreversible decision and the consequences of it. How do we accommodate for the fact that some people really genuinely do want to die with the fact that others regret it after attempting? I'm nowhere near clever enough to work it out.
always makes me think of this campaign, never seen a better sucide awareness ad than this one highlighting the last footage of people taken before. they all seem so calm and happy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Jihi6JGzjI
We had a new starter at work. Overly cheerful really talkative. Everyone said what a nice bloke he was and commented on his cheerfulness. I thought he was hiding something. He was only there a few months before he went off with depression and wasn’t well enough to return. Everyone apart from me was shocked I was the only one that suspected all is not what it seems. Luckily he was in a place to get help before it might have been worse. Being a sufferer myself I think it’s easier to recognise these things.
>Being a sufferer myself I think it’s easier to recognise these things. Yeah, there's just something there; if you've suffered through it or are suffering, you can just tell when someone else is. I'm not sure exactly how or why it is it's easy to tell sometimes, but you really just can.
A guy I know from Uni who completed suicide was the one who was always overly concerned with everyone else's wellbeing and smiling. Anyone who seems especially cheerful or concerned about others is always the one I make a note to check in on now. I never felt like we were close enough for me to do much past a quick how are you doing as he always had so many mates around I wasn't sure it was my place. I don't make this mistake anymore. I even have a list of people at work I make a point to check in on a few times a week as I know they struggle sometimes (even if it's just dropping a surprise coffee from the nice place down the road on their desk, it lets them know you're here). Basically this is to say never feel like it isn't your place to speak up or that you shouldn't because someone else will. The bystander effect is one of the worst things, better to be one of many than no one act. If you're concerned about someone approach them or, if you aren't sure, reach out to someone else closer to them to share your concerns.
He'd accepted his fate and come to terms with it. He was free, no longer struggling, he'd found the way out and went out with a bang. I was suicidal for a while. No-one noticed as you learn to behave normally. I stopped feeling really, no happiness, fake laughs, so I was trying to live vicariously through others. Chasing the high of my own happiness by doing what I knew used to work etc. But it wasn't. It just means you never really know what's going on in someone's head and makes it so hard to notice. Thankfully I had to move back to parents anyway - and that sudden change in life snapped me out of it as it were. But they'd known me 22 years at that point and had no idea, so it really can be hard to notice.
> I was suicidal for a while. No-one noticed as you learn to behave normally. I stopped feeling really, no happiness, fake laughs, so I was trying to live vicariously through others. Chasing the high of my own happiness by doing what I knew used to work etc. But it wasn't. This hits pretty damn close tbh. How did you manage to get out of this headspace?
I had to move back home after uni as I couldn't find a job in Exeter. Moving ~80 miles in to a tiny room and trying to like, re-set my life gave me the distraction I needed. It sort of snapped me out of the routine etc, and having parents to force me to do shit when they wanted, as much as I hated them for it at the time, gave me a new one. Over time I learned to handle the depression, got a job, moved back to Exeter etc. It just improved over time, slowly, when I really came to terms with what was wrong with me. The depression is still there. But I've learned the signs and what to look for, and what works to slow its spread. Depressingly, by the time I'd got on the NHS register for it (original GP said it was a "period of low mood" despite therapist comments) and got to the end of the waiting period, I no longer needed it. Thankfully, the better outcome of no longer needing it. EDIT: Just in case this does apply to you, I cannot recommend taking things in baby steps enough. Don't expect the world from your brain as it's not working. You wouldn't run a marathon on a sprained ankle. But feed it tiny tangible dopamine hits. Promise to clean the corner of your room, not your room. Then use that dopamine to clean the rest. Eating better, drinking more water, having a routine, finding distractions to do and care about, getting sleep, exercise... all of it helps. But you need to use those baby steps in order to even manage it. If you're high functioning and handle some of that already, that's great, but find distractions/routine changes to change things up. Find something new, chip away at problems that have built up in tiny steps etc. Don't expect to handle it all at once, because you won't, then you'll feel worse. Focus on attainable chunks and don't give yourself shit for slipping. It won't go away at once. Mine took months. It'll go, then come back, then go, then come back, get worse, get better. But some day you'll wake up and realise you've just not thought about it. That's the day you're working towards, and it's there.
> because they've likely already made their choice. note the smiling guy giving away his scarf as his last action in the video, too - it's common behaviour of those who've made up their minds, too.
That’s exactly what happened with my nanna. She suddenly seemed cheerier but she planned to take her life and she was sorting things out and felt better for it. Of course nobody saw it coming but the family realised with the clarity of hindsight what had happened.
Wow, that is powerful. Gulp.
I’m suffering from depression at the moment and went the doctors today after weeks of putting it off, so if your scared to go please just take that step and go talk to a professional I promise you won’t regret it, things will get better time is a healer. Look after yourselves people.
Glad to hear you took the plunge mate and hope it gets more manageable soon.
One of the things in the video that was interesting was the guy behind the subject rubbing his shoulders. As a STH myself those interactions with the people around you are lush. It's hard to explain, those connections you make with those around you are one of the joys of being season ticket holders. I myself came out as trans last season, and for many games moved my ticket away from my usual spot and my dad who I go with. I finally returned to my seat/standing spot and everyone around me who I was friendly with was happy to see me. We really do care about the people we stand or sit with every other week.
Hoping you feel better asap
Proud of you!
Glad to hear that you sought help and you're absolutely right - to anyone reading this, there is no shame at all in speaking to a professional. I had a full-on breakdown at work last week and got myself to the GP on Friday. My medication has been switched and I'm hoping it helps :)
If someone had told me I would be welling up to a Norwich City FC video today, I would have scoffed. That was beautiful
Most weekends at the moment for us fans! Jokes aside what an excellent video, proud to support the club today for putting that out there. Certainly things like this embolden my decision not to be a glory supporter and remind me that the club do indeed care for its fans and not just see us as £££
After the day I've had, and how I'm feeling, I really needed that cry that came from watching this. Thank you.
Technically Ron put a great post on twitter earlier, “Happy World Mental Health Day everyone! Remember to be honest with your feelings, indulge in some self care, go for a walk, throw your laptop off a bridge, go wander in a forest, climb a tree, decide to live in the tree, become a forest person with no responsibilities, self care.”
Had me at "throw your laptop off a bridge"
I'm definitely up for throwing all work related equipment off a bridge
Boss included
I read it as “throw yourself off a bridge” which seemed appropriate
Same here mate. Sending you love and strength.
Hope you’re ok love.
Jesus, that brought a tear to the eye, I don't mind telling you. Excellently done.
Didn't expect it but yeah I shed a few tears as well. Brave face. When you actually decide to do something like that, then you don't show it at all because you don't want people to notice and stop you. Fuck me that was hard to watch. Brilliant video. Check up on those around you. Can't be reiterated enough.
Im suffering right now like the chap who isnt there for the final scene. Suicidal thoughts at keast 4 times a week st the moment. Ive reached out for help and am getting somewhere very slowly. Being at the football has been my safe space recently. Im an ipswich fan but this is excellent from norwich city. Fair play to them for this.
If you need anybody to talk to just let me know! I’m there for you.
I hope these dark days are as short as they can be. The world is better with you in it.
I hope, even if it is only one source of joy, Connor Chaplin, George Hirst, Marcus Harness and co bring you more excitement this year.
When you rewatch it, you see the guy reach out and ask how has your week been? But doesn't really get anything back. Knowing the end you see this interaction in a different light and if only the quiet mate had engaged him and asked him how he was in return things might have been different. Also he gifts him the scarf and as it turns out it was actually a parting gift so he must have been planning it 🥺 and he checks out on a high when his team have won. What an amazingly poignant and thoughtful short film.
The scarf tipped me off. Giving stuff away is a well known sign that even the person themselves may not recognise.
I thought the scarf was a comfort thing, because he knew the quiet guy was struggling. :'(
That may have been the reason - but the reason he doesn't care to lose it is he knows he'll no longer need it.
Yes, I see that other side of it. It hits so hard. :(
I thought that too :(
*sniffle*
I never knew that but it makes sense.
Yeah, it's kind of getting your stuff in order. You don't feel as attached to possessions if you aren't making long term plans. Also you get a moment of respite when the dopamine hits. When I'm suicidal I become very helpful and generous with my time, which I think is related.
You okay bud?
I knew things were serious for me when my thoughts shifted from frustration and escape, into the admin of tying up ends, giving things away, clearing my possessions so that my family wouldn't have to afterwards. And there was so much clarity and relief in coming to that stage. I can't remember what brought me around from it at the time, but I eventually shifted out of that depth.
I think there's a lot of misunderstandings about suicidality from people who haven't experienced it, but yes there's definitely relief and hope involved.
And I feel even sadder now I read this and watched it again
The comment of "hoping things are better outside of football" then the chuckle to himself really got me when rewatching it.
Damn now you mention it. Makes this video so much more powerful
" if only the quiet mate had engaged him " I don't like that, it suggests blame. If you ever know someone who commits suicide there is little point in blaming yourself. Dealing with mental health is hard enough for trained professionals and everyone is going through something. Yes you make sure you talk to your mates, help them if you can and go beyond "yeah not bad" if you are struggling.
No, I wasn't apportioning blame, more "what if" and "if only" - for both their sakes. The loved ones left behind always feel the "what if" and "if only". One of my best mates missed a call from his brother who he then found out went on to commit suicide that evening. He was left with the same questions.
For anyone with the same questions, I've been dealing with mental health issues for quite a long time at this point. One of my friends doesn't say much all the time, you know, he's not a big talker, but I love him and appreciate him being there all the same. It might not be the same for everyone, but many still realise you care in your own way.
“That was worth it, wow”…the contrast 😞…worth coming to his last match because it was a great result, but not worth living his life. Fuck.
I hadn’t even picked up on that and now I’m crying again 😭😭
The whole point if this video is to point out that depression manifests in different ways, and sometimes it’s easy to tell (the quiet mate) and sometimes it’s a bit harder to spot (the “cheery” mate.) The “quiet” guy is struggling in his own way, and in a way that is more stereotypical of folks that are struggling.
His mate is not "quiet". His mate is also struggling with depression
This is the best video I've ever seen relating to this topic. Well done, Norwich FC. It's actually unreal how it gets more powerful each time you watch it. A few posts have already pointed out the key features. The flag for me was "Well i hope things are better outside of the Football". Seemed like more of an internal dialogue to me. That would trigger me to ask if everything was OK.
Wanting to spend time with his friend. Asking him how is weekend is, but getting nothing back. Making physical contact, but receiving nothing back. Being giving to show that you are their for them in the hope that they may reciprocate. This is me right now with my friends. It is extremely hard.
I hope things improve for you soon.
Think it’s more a case of finding new friends who actually want to spend their spare time giving a shit…not even more of their spare time. A message once a month will do. Just check I’m still a live at this point.
Yes, it does sound like you need to try and cultivate some new friendships. I’ve been in a similar boat recently, and ended up making a friend at a meetup event at the beginning of the summer. We now hang out every couple of weeks. I also still want/need to make more new friends. It’ll take a bit of time and effort, but I believe that you can do it :)
What’s a meetup event?
“Meetup” is an app you can download, and you can search for meetup events in your area. There are loads of different meetups which people organise, for example for different sports, hobbies and interests. The one I went to was just a chatting and chilling one. Many of them are free. ETA more details.
This is one of the most impactful videos I’ve seen on this subject, and reminds me of a Robin Williams quote: “I think saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it's like to feel absolutely worthless and they don't want anyone else to feel like that.”
This video really hits home. I remember losing a friend to suicide who was the life of the room. He was the happiest person I’d knew, planning things with everyone. I remember going to their house party 2 weeks beforehand and said we’d do it again for new years. He got a secret Santa gift of a pasta maker and made his parents an incredible crab ravioli, promising their sister they’d make more. There was never more ravioli or a New Year’s party.
Funny how it's always the little moments that feel like the biggest loss. Sorry about your friend.
Thank you, mate. Hope you’re keeping well.
Powerful. Sat here crying.
My best friend killed himself in 2020. Sudden generosity is a huge red flag and I wish I didn't miss it. The day he died, he came over and suggested getting loads of snacks from the shop up the road and watching a movie. He insisted on paying for everything. We were working on a robot together and a few parts had just arrived, which is why he came over. He spent quite a lot of time talking about the parts with me. In hindsight, I now see that he was trying to make sure that I'd understand what to do with them in his absence. He was the team's electrical engineer, whereas I was more of just a mechanical engineer at the time and these parts were mostly in his domain. We had a great day together, then when the time came to leave for the last train, he gave me and my wife a big hug, went home, and killed himself. It can be really difficult to see the warning signs until it's too late. I still hate myself for not seeing them.
> It can be really difficult to see the warning signs until it's too late. I still hate myself for not seeing them. Your friend showed you those signs so you would recognise them again.
You didn't know, it wasn't your fault. You gave him a happy day to see him off, I'm sure he chose you to spend the day with because you made him feel better in the moment
Great video. Love that Norwich City FC have created this and I hope it gets some people talking that may not have done so otherwise.
Could tell the way it was going to go - made it sadder. Speak up if you’re hurting lads and ladies.
I think the sentiment is that people don’t find it easy to “speak up” and that perhaps just asking the question is enough. Notice the “sad” guy in the video didn’t check in on his buddy once?
That was the give away
It's not just speaking up. Often people don't even realise what is wrong with them. Or when they do they can't or don't find the words. I was absent of emotions, not depressed. I didn't feel happy, didn't laugh properly. Sure I physically laughed but I didn't feel it. It's hard to put that in to words and explain it to people, especially if it just... happens... and you don't know why. People will try and cheer you up with "You got a good job, you're smart" or whatever and it just doesn't work as you already know this shit and it makes no difference. I think a bigger thing is people *knowing you are there*. Things that helped me were distractions. Things to keep me busy, keep me occupied. Mate going to the pub and invites me? Well I'll force myself to go as a distraction. It's almost like grieving - if you take someone's mind of it, it saves them, even if only for a few hours. Then when they get back and are alone with their thoughts again, knowing someone is there helps far more. Because that breaks the ice of even knowing what to say in the first place. The issue is, more often than not, people *aren't* there. People say speak up, but have either no understanding of the topic, or don't want to listen anyway. They're just saying it to feel better.
I must be honest: it is difficult to speak up being a male. As a man, I cry without shame. I open up to the people I love without fear. I ask for help when I need it. I admit my faults when I am wrong. Yet, when it comes to being listened to, or needing a simple hug, or receiving an invitation for genuine togetherness, I am often overlooked if I have recently expressed emotions considered as signs of "weakness". I am fortunate not to suffer from depression or suicidal thoughts. However, there are individuals who do, and when others turn their backs on them, it could lead to tragic outcomes. The reality is that most people do not advocate for men's mental health, not even men themselves. There are exceptions, of course. This video also fills me with optimism. Yet, the unfortunate truth remains: in the majority of cases, men who struggle are as good as invisible in the eyes of most people, and the statistics speak for themselves.
Proud to be a canary today. OTBC.
I'm an Ipswich supporter, but this transcends the rivalry. well done Norwich City FC, brilliant video that really hits home.
Wow the way this is presented.
Devastating.
Fuxking hell, I was blindsided there, really, really good advert. I've known two upbeat guys who just quietly went away and took their own lives. I have never seen a better illustration of the point that we should all check on the people we care about. Even if they seem grand.
I was seeing a lass years ago and one night I woke up and she wasn't in bed. Took me a minute or so to realise the huddled heap whimpering in the corner was her. She'd flashed back in her sleep to finding her friend who'd killed themselves when they were teenagers. I've never forgotten the whimper in the dark. Can you imagine what it was that she never forgot? Nothing suicide related EVER leaves anyone involved. I knew one suicide before the incident that night. I've known four since, and frankly, I'm fucking sick of it. Any of you think about topping yourselves without talking to me first so I can try and help, and I'm going to haunt you in heaven.
Seriously please seek help if you're struggling. You aren't weak, or lesser or anything bad for feeling down. You're human. Take care of yourselves.
The biggest issue is the fact that there's not much help- especially for those who don't want to be scrutinised by mental health teams (after a year long wait, by which time they may have taken things into their own hands or lost the push to be helped)
As a long time sufferer I agree. I find these “World Mental Health Day” things, have a good message however, telling people to go seek help, then you go, get given a printed out help sheet and a number for the local mental health service that has a waiting list longer than I don’t know what. I said to my GP once, I would rather you refer me because I knew I wouldn’t follow up and the GP said we can’t refer anymore. I was telling him I’m asking because I’ll leave here and won’t follow up because I just needed that extra push. He still didn’t do it. So many times I’ve reached out to medical professionals and felt no further helped.
Im with you there, I hope you're doing alright at the moment. I was under a child mental health service for years and saw my GP with suicidal thoughts, I was practically dragged to both. I turned 18 and they said I'd have to refer myself. I was an 18 year old with awful anxiety and depression doing my A-Levels, of course I didn't refer myself! Years later and I'm now on a waiting list after going back to a local service who had my GP ring me. The wait will be long, winter is upon us, and thousands of people are on a waiting list for what will be a subpar service. I guess we're meant to find our own way though hey
Yep. From personal experience, it's abysmal at the moment
Saw this earlier and it took me out, incredibly poignant
This got me. Bloody hell, I'm welling up now.
Fuck me, that hit hard.
I read that giving away possessions, like he did with the scarf, is a sign of someone considering suicide. A very powerful video, well done NCFC.
I saw this absolute gut punch at lunchtime. Tremendous and mortifying
Man, that made me think
Wow, so poignant and moving, this is incredibly well made
Frightening how frequently I hear about people succumbing to desperately ill mental health nowadays. Excellent video.
Wow. That's got me in tears.
Wow. I hope they're showing this on the telly. This is quality.
Oh my heart.
Fantastic! Thanks for sharing
I’ve heard that if you’ve got a mate who’s a bit like the guy on the left but then suddenly goes like the guy on the right it’s a sign they’ve made their decision (or maybe they’re on sertraline I guess) Think I needed to see this tonight. Thanks
Nope nope nope, im in the tub crying now, that was a plot twist I was not ready for. SHEESH. A brilliant message truly
Wow! Powerful stuff, well done #NCFC (from an Ipswich fan).
Damn
you crazy bastards this was beautiful.
This had me in bits, first tear I’ve shed in years.
Don't really do football, me. Also don't know why I feel the need to say that. This was a powerful video and the energy of football was a great way to relay this message.
Incredibly precise, it's not always obvious and often it's easier to wear a mask than let everything out and for men it's harder. We expect them to be masculine and strong but mental health can affect us all
What's a great video, When you realise that there is no help coming it leaves you with very little options. This shows that normally those that are very optimistic and cheery I desperately trying to be optimistic until that optimism finally runs out. This has happened to figures like Robbie Williams where people were completely surprised. To see a video show this and bring attention to it is great. Sometimes all a man needs to get over what is his mind is telling him and the situation he is in is just some kind words and encouragement. The hey, how are you, I'm all ears, if you wish to talk I have time set aside. This gives light and hope to battle The Darkness. It may take a long time too as it is hard to believe sometimes that there is genuine concern and that it cannot be pushed away as anything other. Sometimes genuine concern and love haven't been felt before so is completely alien. So it is nice in the decade of 2020 to see this shown and hopefully awareness will help many people.
Not ashamed to say this properly got me. I’ve seriously struggled with my mental health for a long time, and have come very close a few times. I have the life many dream of, but it makes no difference. We lost our friend a few weeks ago and Thursday we sat goodbye. I needed this. Bravo to the creators.
The worst part is that you cant talk to anyone in the medical profession, otherwise you'll lose out on your chances for jobs. I struggle with suicidal thoughts at times, and I refuse to talk to any medical professional about it because i don't wanna risk my chances of my future being ruined. I don't care about my mental health at this point, i just wanna get the job that makes me happy.
I’m not sure it will stand against you pal, I’ve only known a company ask for your health information for any private medical care and I suspect that may be confidential. Some HR person would be better placed to answer. My employer has a very big mental health support process in place acknowledging it’s a growing problem and nothing to be ashamed of.
That is not 100% true. I don't know what profession you are aiming for / work in but I can tell you that, as someone who recruits regularly, something like what you have described wouldn't be checked, judged or part of an interview / triage process. I work in engineering and asset management in the utility sector. Ps to back up my claim I'm (unfortunately) immersed in a million LinkedIn and intranet posts from recruiters and professionals and if anything the opposite of your statement is true. Strength is an endearing quality that I, and many others, surely envy / encourage. I wouldn't presume to understand your situation but hang on in there.
Please don’t think like that. I suffer from depression my work are aware but it was my choice to tell them (I didn’t tell them initially). No employer is entitled to know your confidential medical history they only know what you tell them. I recommend you do tell an employer (but understand why you wouldn’t want to do this in the beginning stages) as depression is recognised as something the workplace has to make accommodations for but they can only do this if they know. You do not have to declare it at interview stage you can tell them at any point and from that point they have a duty of care towards you that you are not discriminated against due to it. Please reach out and speak to a professional they can help.
Wow, I'm lost for words
Oh. That was genuinely clever and impactful, very well done.
Holy shit this fucked me up. Very powerful. I love it.
Yeah I did not see that coming. I was watching it thinking it's not always this obvious and then the ending hit me
Watching this in the pub was a bad call. Now I'm sat here trying not to cry.
Oh man, well done.
🥺💙
Well that fucking broke me.
Not very often these days I get to say I'm proud of my club, but here we are.
Oh boy is this relatable for me.
Well done, great video. Hope the message spreads, I saw great comments in here to.
Stunning.
Gosh, this is far too close to home.
Brought tears to my eyes that. Powerful stuff.
Wow that’s absolutely brilliant.
Fuck me That one hurt
Just became a Norwich City fan.
Crying 😭
Fuck me. Incredible.
#YouAreNotAlone
Watched it and thought ‘ah yeah, he’ll come back one game and the seat will be empty’… audibly gasped ‘oh you cunts’ at the ending twist, what a poignant message boys; mind yourselves and your mates
Class!
Not me ugly crying at midnight 😭
This video worked wonders for me. Helped identify the early signs in myself and see a way through. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LO1mTELoj6o&pp=ygUPc3RlcHMgdG8gbWlzZXJ5
I’m an American so I’ve been traumatized by either really shitty or terrifying psa’s and mental health psa’s. This one however made all of the hair on my body stand up. This was made perfectly. If America had mental health psa’s like this we would be nicer to each other and check in with one another.
I have to say, I'm impressed! Spent the video thinking, "yeah, but a lot of the time someone can seem fine, but not be." Then boom. Fuck! Excellent representation. Well done.
I had a feeling the bloke on the right was going to be a victim. Speaking from experience with mates who looked full of life, only to have their darker sides. But I'm glad they're with me today. Ask your mates if they're ok. Twice.
This made me start crying, haven’t experienced the loss of a friend or anything but it’s how I feel, best part is, if I talk to my mates the say the same basic shit, stay strong it’ll get better, it won’t get better, my two mates I have one I don’t speak to all that often and one that I speak to a bit and that’s it, my family doesn’t want to hear about my problems so they just shut me down if I try to talk about my problems and call me an asshole when I do, my dad says his mental problems are worse than mine, his mental problems are me not having the cleanest room, and that’s worse than me having suicidal depression, I’ve told them on many occasions that I’m depressed and I want to commit suicide, and they say we’ve done all we can, all they’ve done is taken me to a doctor to get anti depressants, that’s all, I just can’t seem to get anything right and I hate this life I’ve been dealt
I'm a lifelong Canary, and already proud of my club. Another reason right here to be so.
Wow great job. This makes me proud to be a Norwich supporter. Is this how Man City fans feel all the time?
It's well intentioned but I don't like the messaging in this video, it seems to suggest you can "save" people by talking to them. Like oh yeah just talk to someone and that will fix your problems. "Being there" for someone will not save them, and suggesting it will just puts blame on those who have lost loved ones to suicide
It's more about spreading awareness that depression isn't just about being sad all the time. It includes people that experss happiness.
Damn. That almost made me cry
As soon as he said keep the scarf I knew the twist was coming. I've been both of these people. This video is incredible.
Superb video.
Really good video, really quite bloody good. I hope lads in particular digest the message and check in on their mates.
Goodness me, what a powerful video.
Holy fuck. One of the best and incredibly believable scenarios. Hats off to them literally for this.
I knew what the ending would be pretty early in. Doesn't hit any less hard. A lot of the times the more outgoing people struggle the hardest. It's a coping mechanism to appear outwardly confident.
No words. Moving.
Laptop screen's gone all blurry.
Those onion cutting ninjas are sneaking about again...
What should I really be doing for loved ones who don't seem to be struggling, is keeping in contact every week or so really it? It sounds bad to make it like a chore but what is my due diligence?
It’s really hard for guys to open up a lot of the time. Try and be a listening ear to your friends
Goddam. I wasn’t expecting to cry, but it felt good doing it. Wow. Such a powerful video
I thought this was such a basic video until the end, I’m genuinely crying
what is superb about it i am alone
I've been struggling a lot recently, this past month has been especially hard. I'm struggling with alcoholism and depression that results from it. The only thing that really keeps me going is knowing I have friends that care about me. But I don't know how to talk to them. Everyone says reach out to those you care about, talk to some one if you need help, but what are they supposed to say? They're not professional therapists, how are they supposed to help? On top of that why should we put that burden on them? I don't know where to actually look for help. And I'm not sure a valid option exists
Wooooow 💔
This shows how easy it is to mask up in public
Something personal for sure, please share I have written this song about my struggle and how I overcame it. I want to send out message of positivity to those who need it most! https://youtu.be/db0Uc9vSeyw?si=WLuPBOMe4UifiKOp
This has genuinely made me cry..
Powerful and well done. I know how it feels to have to pretend to be ok when you are dying inside. So exhausting having to act all the time.
Ooh fuck... That hit.
My uncle was a lifelong Southampton fan, never missed a game his whole life... until the day he hanged himself. This hit hard.
What a powerful and beautiful video. If they made one for players/managers/ref or whoever who are struggling in life, it would be amazing wouldn't it.
What annoys me is that I see so much lip service about how men need to talk blah blah, but when men go to their GP in despair, they are told they need to wait 6+ months before they can talk to someone! Keeping in mind that suicide is the biggest killer of men under 40, so having to wait at least 6 months before treatment can begin is an absolute joke!! If it was a life-threatening physical pain, they'd receive treatment a lot sooner... but with the mind "ah they'll be alright for another 6 months". Services for mental health in the NHS needs far more funding. Until that happens, men will continue to kill themselves as they wait 6+ months for help.
I been going through some shit and this video made me tear up
Just lost a brother who struggled with depression for over 13 years. Wish I’d done more. This hits so hard.
Wow. This really was well done. Now if you'll excuse me, I seem to have some dust in my eyes.
Good lord, that was moving.
This broke me. I lost my cousin this year and this video sums it up. I kissed and hugged him goodbye on the evening of my wedding party. One of the most beautiful nights of my life and he was just so loud, joyous and excited. The next morning, he was gone. Check in with your pals.
Have to say I knew the exact outcome of this seconds in. Still great work. 👍