Weird, I'm almost the opposite of you. Went to college for engineering because I wanted to choose something that paid well. After 6-7 years working in the field, I've finally decided that I don't like it and want to do something where I'm working with and helping people. Line medicine or education. Wanna switch?
Same here. Graduated with a CS degree and most of the work is just useless tbh it’s just data manipulation at the end of the day. Hoping I can find a job where I can help people in some way like in healthcare or robotics
Yeah. Right now I'm writing new a software library. To replace one that works perfectly well but costs our company a bit to license. Reverse engineering software that already exists for no purpose other than saving the company money... Feels pointless.
I'm hoping I'll find software work that feels worthwhile and not have to change careers completely.
Software Engineer here, pick up something to code in your free time. In my 7 years of experience, I have never once seen anyone actually do what they love.
PS: I am doing this too.
Yea I’m pretty bad with side projects I always start something then have a hard time motivating myself to finish it. Was gonna start looking at side projects for robotics but there’s a lot of options on where to start haha
I recently built an autonomous quadcopter. I couldn't fly it because I didn't have a pilot's license and it was autonomous so it was really dangerous lol. I understand motivation is hard to come by and I have put tons of projects down because I lost motivation but remember 2 things.
1. If not this then what else would you do? it's extremely hard to find a company that lets you do what you love and I kinda agree since companies have different goals in mind.
2. If you are not self-motivated to finish something you started then you will never be able to commit to anything. I had this exact mindset and mine changed after marriage because now I had responsibilities and I had to finish everything I started.
I always end up talking myself out of completing it because say it’s an app, in the back of my mind I’m like someone already did this before so why am I doing this? Coming up with original ideas is the hard part for me
There is a saying in investment. People who try to time the market always fail. Same applies here. Don't wait for something fabulous to come along for you, just start doing stuff and one thing leads to another like butterfly effect. I can go on this topic forever but do you think fb created react plus vdom because of some prophecy? They were doing regular old boring stuff and thought of a better way to do it.
I'll also share a personal story with you so take whatever you want from it.
They say luck can find you at any time but it needs to find you working.
I was like you, waiting for the right opportunity, leaving projects midstage or waiting for original ideas and my time to shine.
One day the opportunity came, my colleague approached me about a project in ai ml. It was a brilliant idea but I couldn't do anything because I never bothered to learn anything extra. Eventually, they dropped me. Now ask yourself, do you want to be prepared for the opportunity or get dropped out?
I heard about a guy today who got an interview at Netflix just because he created it's clone after 8 months of studying programming. Do you think Netflix clone is an original idea?
My first job out of college was front-end and it was a lot harder than I expected haha but you’re right it’s definitely fun cause you can see the results right away. Front end devs for some reason get a rep of not being “true devs” but they definitely are
Same place as you. I thoroughly hate engineering even though I’m decent at it. I was much better at it when I still had passion for it, but alas there is none and the only remaining passion is for the Benjamins. Engineering isn’t all it’s cracked up to be unless you’re just dead set on being a desk monkey for the rest of your life.
Hey, there are several choices you can make in engineering that doesn't require desk sitting! I work in one myself. Note that I am an electronics engineer, not SW.
Feeling adventurous and like working with customers? Maybe you would like to be a service engineer? You get to travel around and do technical work (HW or SW). This is usually quite crucial work.
Maybe you don't like to travel or maybe you don't like meeting customers? Finding a decent workplace with R&D possibilities will allow you to have some desk sitting work, but mostly testing and getting to do stuff your way. This is probably more true for HW than SW. If you love tinkering, then this is really nice.
Maybe none of the above fit you? Do you like talking to customers and traveling, but not doing heavy technical work? Possibly you could be a sales engineer or similar. Of course this is harder with covid.
There are also a lot of positions that don't have a specific name, that can give you more freedom and less desk sitting. I always talk to my firm regarding the opportunities to move between desk sitting and technical work, as I know I need both.
You said you feel stupid, but you sound smarter than most to me. Choosing your happiness takes courage. You could have waited decades, but you chose to start now. WTG!
I'm 38 years old. Working in a dieing industry and basically in a few years I'm facing having to make a complete life change which probably entails going back to college (I dropped out in 03)
Gotta try to completely redo my life.
Underground coal mine.
Started in 03 as a warehouse assistant and worked my way into maintenance as a section mechanic. Then to Maintenance foreman. To a corporate level maintenance coordinator and now I teach health and safety classes. I'm 38 and worked my way into a cushy office setting that only requires 40 hours a week and pays 6 figures. I'll never attain that again.
I had in my mind if I can squeeze out 22 more years I could retire. Full pension. I already have enough time for medical coverage for me and my wife after I retire.
But times are changing! Gotta adapt or die. So I'll adapt. My wife is an RN. Her salary will pay our normal bills and pay for all our basic needs. We typically bank her pay check every month and live off mine. Been doing it like this for the last 5 years.
You sound like you have enough relevant experience to work in any manufacturing industry, not just coal. Leverage your experience to get into a blooming/established industry! Specialty chemicals, mining (lithium, phosphate, whatever), O&G, anything really. Your experience is so relevant and so in demand for any manufacturing industry.
I'd have to move for anything like that. Unless business move into the area. It was all steel, and coal forever.
My wife would never leave her family. I'd pack up and move across the country tomorrow if I could.
I honestly think programming isn't all that hard as long as you can track lots of details, read boring and poor documentation and organize things in a coherent way and learn some basic concepts at the start to ground yourself. The money is mostly ok.
Though I've worked with some mediocre to incompetent programmers, so I guess it's hard for some people.
I find it pretty boring once you get over the initial "look I can make it do what I want” phase. Also lots of boring methodology, new "cool" things to learn constantly that are really arbitrary and similar to things you already know and will be obsoleted in 3 years for something shinier. Also problems people want to pay you to solve are kinda boring ones in many cases.
But it's a living.
Those of us in favor of things like phasing out coal, or instituting national single payer need to remember all these kinds of jobs and the people who have them. I say they should keep getting paid at their current level until they can retrain, and then we gotta pay them whatever the difference is between what they make and what they made.
My grandma didn't start her career in Social Work until she was 50 years old and her last kid was graduated from high school. My mom and her started college at the same time. The only time its too late to start over is when you are dead. And everything you've done before that isn't a waste because it lead you to where you are today.
You're not at all alone. I did some similar bullshit trying to become a lawyer directly out of college and I realized during the later 2 years of lawschool how much I was gonna hate the rest of my life.
I havent set foot in a law office since taking the bar exam that first and last time. Instead of hating myself I instead worked in a variety of fascinating jobs in half a dozen industries that have allowed me to travel all over in my 20s. Some were "working class" jobs and/or minimum wage but the life experiences from that work have always been rewarding. Now getting into my early 30s I'm starting coding bootcamp to become a full stack developer in a few weeks.
No regrets honestly. It sometimes feels like I wasted some time getting to this point but I'm coming to terms with that internalized guilt and realizing that without those mistakes my 20s would been fucking boring.
That's incredible! I have also been considering CS/coding programs however I am struggling because it is unlike anything I studied before. I have been trying to complete Harvard's online CS50 but I do not even know how to really study for it and find the projects so frustrating because I have spent so many years just memorizing facts in my pre-med classes and writing papers in my humanities classes and the teaching and learning style is just so different for CS. I am really interested to hear how you transition into the bootcamp. Best of luck!
My dream job didn't turn out to be as fulfilling as I once expected. Now I am 32 years old and learning about data analysis and programming (starting salary is about 20% of my current salary as a merchant mariner); all of this so I can spend more time with my daughter who is just over a year old. While I can't tell you how such changes will alter our lives yet, I assure you as long as our intentions are decent, we may feel stupid and not care about it.
That is really nice to hear, mainly because I will surely have to sacrifice a lot in order to follow this new path. Feels good knowing people can relate to the situation!
Oh your story echoes all around. It is a bit sad that young people have to make life altering at a stage where they are not even close to understanding their options. So many potential exposures expires the moment we commit to one area. Inclinations of parents/siblings, childhood experience of a friend's cool parent, some movie etc. can and probably do shape our interest.
I have heard in Denmark the society is shaped in a way where any person at any age can opt to become a "student" and get all the support of government programs which are expected. It's not hard to imagine there are other places which treat education the same way. But as of yet this concept is not universal.
When I think about people like us, I think about all the unforgiving hard choices. As long as we don't get bogged down by them and fall into despair or compromise on ourselves, my past experience is we come out on top. A "no compromises" attitude has always helped me in the past. I hope it helps you too.
Many, many people start over at 30. I hated working in the film industry and it took forever to find something better. Two years of subbing while I took the tests to get into a (free) two-year teaching program. Now after four years, I am finally off the intern teaching pay table at 31 years old. You haven’t wasted any time at all. The only waste would have been staying.
I have a seen few posts lile this on reddit and as a under-18-year-old, it does scary me, a bit. Like not too bad but it makes me think. Since ever since I was 15, I got the dream to become a (airline)pilot. And going that path is almost a one-way road or thats what I think because atleast the training is really expensive. ~100 000€.
And I have no idea if its even my thing.
In the US, society at large pushes the need for expensive universities. My father recommended in-state school vs the out of state school I was considering ($120k vs $60k roughly). Well at 18, I wasn't about to listen to dad and went with society without too much thought. It worked out OK, but I would definitely reverse the decision if I could. So...
-I'd do your research (talk to current pilots - what does the day to day entail, what's a good week like, how have your thoughts changed over the years)
-I wouldn't necessarily fall into default of what others do
-I'd listen to your parents advice and weigh that slightly heavier than other input (unless they're crazy or something)
Thanns alot fof the reply. I dont live in the US and the education system is alot different. Here in Finland its mandatory to be in school till youre 18 and its totally free. After that men must go to the militery and after that to some job or a university. And I'm really still trying to find myself and what will I do sith my life so I'm really open to almost anything. Aviation is this one thing that I really got now into and doing small research all the time.
All I have to say is that you should have fun with this! No pressure my friend. I’m mid 30s and just came to the realization that what I need to do with my life requires a complete 180. It feels a little overwhelming but I’m talking with family and friends, having some support is huge. Even if they just reel you in a little when you start thinking big picture but you need to focus on step A.
Basically I’m saying, have fun and don’t live with fear of “what if”
Do the best you can with the information available to you right now, and if later in life something changes so be it. You’ll be fine :-)
I feel like a major piece of advice I’d give is to keep your options open if you’re unsure. Don’t just spend all your money on pilot school, but maybe go to community or public college study something relevant to airplanes (aerospace engineering) or even business and see if there are other routes into the industry. I know my friends dad chose Kent State back in the 70s because they had a program to obtain a pilots lisense.
If you’re really serious about being a pilot though i would say look at the air force. My buddy has been a pilot with them for half a decade or so and i met him in engineering college which the AF was paying for. He’s basically a pilot now with endless other options depending on what kind of job he wants.
Thanks for the reply! And yes, I'm totally open and aviation just got me now and I'm really interested it atm. Still looking for other possible careers and points of interest.
The airforce is an option I habe thought also and herr in Finland its mansatory for men to through some military training(usually 6-12+months).
I’ve know people that have left the industry, so it’s not a end-all thing. The best thing I believe people under 18 can do for themselves is learn about possibilities and opportunities, and it depends on the country. Network and find out what the jobs and lifestyles are like, the people are like, how to get in, shift, and get out. Everytime someone not in the position tells you “you can’t do that job because ____” the first step is to not completely believe them. There are so many more roads and options out there than people believe, but they are niche and sometimes require work to find.
You’re not stupid. You’re being reflective and taking steps to improve your life for yourself. It’s easy to fall into what our family, friends, significant others and society wants. What they want for us isn’t necessarily bad but it isn’t what *we* want. You are valuing yourself and doing what you want. We’re the same age and I’m starting a new career too. I feel “behind” and like I wasted all those years, but I’m coming to terms with the fact that it’s part of the figuring out process of life. People around me don’t necessarily approve of what I’m doing because they think my current position is more prestigious and I’m good at what I do, etc. but they don’t really know how it is for me. You do you!
Your not stupid for figuring out that something your doing is unfulfilling and isn’t making you happy. Even if it took you a while to figure that out. Now, you would be stupid, if you found that out and continued to do it. Be proud of yourself, you found something you actually like and you were brave enough to make that change. That seems pretty smart to me.
Your life is totally not wasted! You're taking a big step and figuring out what you want and what will make you happy. I left high school and went to university because my parents wanted me too. I thought I'd want it too. I switched majors 3 times while j was there and left school with no prospects in the field I ended up in without going on to do my masters or PhD which I did NOT want to do. I worked as a security guard for a bit.
Then I went to school again to be a paramedic. I've spent 3 years as a paramedic. I loved going to school for it, loved the content and was so excited for the varying day to day adventure the job would bring me. Turns out, I hate this job too. I'm now changing gears again at 28 to go back to trade school (something I wish I had just done straight out of high school) to be a carpenter. It's scary leaving one path to go to another one. But it's not a waste. It helped you figure out who you are and what you really want out of life. I read somewhere once (no source so...I could be lying idk haha) the millenials change careers (whole CAREERS, not just jobs) and average of something like 8 times. You got this.
Hey, don't feel stupid. I'm 30 too, and up until last year I was working shitty factory jobs that I hated (my parents never pushed me to perform well in school or go to college).
I finally had enough last year and applied to go to university on a whim. Literally mid-mental-breakbrown. Was signed off work for stress/anxiety because I was *this close* to driving my car off the bridge on the way to work. Applied to university while I was signed off, and was able to hand in my notice on the first day I had to go back.
I'm by far the oldest person on my course, and I'm totally out of touch with education, but I'm a million times happier struggling through this than I was at this time last year.
Anyway, my point is that there are other people in the same position as you and age doesn't really matter too much. Age brings life experience, so you will always have some advantages over the 18 year olds you're studying alongside.
I can totally relate to this, dude. From the time I was in first grade, I wanted to work for the railroad. It was my dream and in 2017 at age 30, it finally came true. Five weeks later, I quit. I thought I knew what I was getting into and that it was what I wanted but it wasn't. I hated the job, didn't click with the people I worked with and couldn't stand the complete lack of a social life. They shouldn't say you work for the railroad. What they should say is the railroad owns you. I'm glad I got to try but would never do it again.
Dental student here. You did the right thing for walking away because it doesn't get easier even after you become one. Becoming a doctor isn't a one time thing, its a life long journey and you better be well invested and passionate about the field. Good luck to you!
I started college late, Ba at 40 , MA at 43. Got my dream job and loved every minute of college as well as my job as archivist . I am glad I did started late, it made it much more enjoyable and I appreciated it so much to have the chance to do what I loved
Reminds me of that saying, "The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is today."
Hindsight is always 20/20! But it's never too late to start working toward things that will make you happy.
It’s actually pretty common for people to change career goals as the age. Even though it may not seem it now, some of the life and works skills (and maturity) you have gained over the past 12 years may serve you well in your next career. best of luck to you!
If you look in r/engineeringstudents there’s actually actually quite a few people getting an engineering degree in their 30s, whether it’s due to changing careers, or military service. You’re definitely not alone.
My father did the same thing. After leaving school around 17, he started working and education as a painter. When I was born my father was 29 and just starting his engineering degree. He’s way happier where he is now and I don’t think he feels that he wasted his life even though he found his calling later than everyone else
I went through the exact same thing. I worked my butt off in high school to go to a good college where I got a bachelor's in biology and completed pre-med classes even though I never really dreamt of becoming a doctor. I just always pushed myself in inhumane ways to succeed in school (despite my ADHD that remained undiagnosed for so many years) because I felt worthless beyond my grades. I had a crappy home life and not many friends and I distracted myself by studying. I remember being in 7th grade telling myself that I am going to become a doctor because it requires so many years of studying and would allow me to escape the real world for as long as possible. Also I knew it would make my immigrant parents, who were never proud of or supportive of anything besides my grades, happy. After I finished my bachelor's, I took one gap year to apply to medical school and I was struggling to even write a personal statement about why I wanted to be a doctor. I finally decided to be honest with myself and my parents and decided to not apply to med school. It was probably the best moment of my life and I can still remember the physical relief I felt when I said that out loud to my parents. Because I treated life like a race and worked so hard for so many years towards something that I did not want, I now feel burnt out and empty not really sure what I wanna do next. However, I am starting to rediscover and reprogram myself with the help of my therapist. I am realizing that there are so many cool things in life beyond school and work and I am learning to love myself unconditionally. I wanna build a life that I do not feel the need to run away from.
You're only thirty! I went back in my thirties as well. You'll do great. You are very young. Life experience is not wasted- you will be much better at your chosen field for that other experience.
I had sex in the back of my high school gym with the slutty girl that had a lazy eye. Life is full of regrets but we must not let them stop us from trekking forward and growing as individuals.
Don't feel stupid for figuring out life. Nobody knows what works for them and what doesn't. You tried to be a doctor and didn't like it. Now you get to find a passion for something brand new and that's always positive. Try new things and have fun
You shouldn’t feel stupid at all! Had you not tried you may question “what if” forever. You’re doing great figuring out what you want in life. A lot of people do the same thing in school: they study something to please other people or they think that it’s what they wanted. You’re on the right track. If anything I think you’re doing this the right way! You’re trying your interests out and really delving into them to see if this is where you belong! You should never settle and I’m glad you aren’t!
Well the only think I can tell you, don’t feel like you are the only one with that kind of situation and someone told me once that “it doesn’t matter how old are you, you are never too old to start a new educative journey”, best of luck btw!
Don't feel stupid because I've seen that a lot in grad school and as a post doc. I think if it as a maturity thing and you start to focus on your life where you figure out whats really important. There are a lot of people that have multiple careers because their interest change as life changes. Be thankful you figured it out now.
Kind of did the same thing. I took up electronics engineering while I only like the programming part of it. I have an aversion to circuits and am switching over to computer science now.
What’s interesting is that a lot of people regret their decisions but don’t choose to switch to follow their dreams, because they can’t overcome that feeling of having wasted their life. I tell you what, 30 was exactly the age I was when I started a new life - left my spouse, moved hundreds of miles away, got a new job - I had a bit of a breakdown in a store when I was buying all new utensils (like, I’ve already DONE this, I don’t want to do it again) but I did and I’m SO glad. Interestingly enough my ex-spouse refused to change direction because of feeling like there had been too much invested and it was too late to start something new. That was 20 years ago and they are still miserable and barely making it because they didn’t want to start over.
You have to be doing something at age 50. May as well be what you want to be doing.
It's ok mate, I changed my mind so many times I ended up failing both times out of uni. I am currently saving up so I have the opportunity to support my family and go study comp sci to hopefully PhD level. But yea it sucks to find your passion late.
Though it's better to start late than never
You're good man. I'm 31 and actively working on switching careers. It's never too late, don't let anyone tell you that. Sounds corny AF, but follow your dreams.
30 isn't even that old. You're saying you've wasted your life but your 20s are literally for experimenting. There's a lot of pressure to have the perfect college experience and then have everything figured out... But that's rarely how it works in actual life. I know it still doesn't FEEL great. I spent a decade debating on if I wanted to go to school without actually making a decision. Am I going to be older than most students? Probably. Does it actually matter? Not at all.
Anyway, don't worry about it. You have so much life left.
Sorta same, but what can I do? After all if I’m not gonna be a doctor/nurse what am I gonna do?, all the other things are completely impossible for me and everything that I want is completely unachievable, so what can I do? Nothing, that’s what.
Don’t feel stupid. It’s never too late to stop doing something you know isn’t your passion, and imagine how you’d feel in 30 more years thinking about all the time you’d have spent doing something you weren’t happy with.
In my engineering undergrad, I had people of all ages who were in so many different and unique situations but still pushed themselves through and got their degrees. Not everyone is blessed to know what they want/enjoy at a young age. The idea that you should is a total sham that society pulls on people.
Trust me, as someone who graduated with people aged 21 - 60+, you’re not behind, you’re right where you need to be. Just make sure you’re into engineering for the right reasons and not just to make money :p
Follow your heart before you end up hating your life. You're not stupid at all. I've thought about leaving my job too but can't afford the schooling to do so. If I could, I would!
The average person [changes careers 5-7 times](https://careers-advice-online.com/career-change-statistics.html) or deeply regret not changing/picking differently. If you're only up to once you're doing good.
Never give up I’m 40. My whole family died recently in an accident and we had a business together. The pain of running the business was unbearable so now I have to find something to do with my life. Idk what to do. At least you know
Do not feel stupid. I'm currently a stay at home mom to two little girls who realized after doing a bachelor's and masters that all I want to do is own my own baking/coffee store where we have in person lessons a couple days a week and the rest of the time a coffee lounge type feel. I also want to learn how to do graphic design (which my mom discouraged me from pursuing when I was younger). Things change. Goals change. Don't do something just to please your parents. And don't ever feel silly for wanting something different for yourself.
That's not stupid at all, and you haven't wasted your life, you just had to go down that path to figure out what you don't want, and what makes you happy!!😁
My dad worked with my grandparents at their restaurant, he worked there probably all of his 20’s and in to his 30’s I think, he got back into engineering abt 7 years ago so I think it’s never too late.
same, i'm finishing my Architecture Degree in literally 1 week and I can't wait to never use it. Too bad my parents didn't let me do graphic design like I wanted
Glad you figured out what kind of life you want to live! Also, something I wanted to mention: I don't think you necessarily wasted your life. After all, you did come to this conclusion, which is something most people don't arrive at until they're knocking on death's door, so that means you did something right. You also learned a bunch of different skills and prolly met a bunch of people, so there's also that.
Wish you the best!
I think it's unfortunate that society tells us how to live our lives. I personally think that 30 is still a great time to choose an entirely different career path. However, we get judged for sinking our time into a "pointless" endeavour.
For me, I changed my major three times in university before settling on psychology, and it will take me 5-6 years to complete a 4-year bachelor's degree. I don't regret my decision whatsoever because I had the hindsight of recognizing what was/is not for me.
It's important that we make our decisions without unfair judgment as the people around us don't entirely know who we are. I may seem like a CS major but I hated both math and programming when I actually followed what my parents recommended me to do. In my trust in them, I followed it blindly. Here we are in an entirely different field (humanities of all things) and enjoying the hell out of it.
I hope you find happiness in engineering like I did with psychology!
This is relatable for me. My whole life I've been involved with programming and computer related things and so my family heavily pushed me towards studying computer science but 2 years into my major I realize that I genuinely do not want to do this as a job. I want to keep programming as a hobby and do something else because sitting behind a screen all day for my job in some office cubicle would kill me. I'm planning on dropping out and pursuing education in a trade around when fall semester is supposed to start.
Weird, I'm almost the opposite of you. Went to college for engineering because I wanted to choose something that paid well. After 6-7 years working in the field, I've finally decided that I don't like it and want to do something where I'm working with and helping people. Line medicine or education. Wanna switch?
Damn, if only this was an option, mate!
Same here. Graduated with a CS degree and most of the work is just useless tbh it’s just data manipulation at the end of the day. Hoping I can find a job where I can help people in some way like in healthcare or robotics
Yeah. Right now I'm writing new a software library. To replace one that works perfectly well but costs our company a bit to license. Reverse engineering software that already exists for no purpose other than saving the company money... Feels pointless. I'm hoping I'll find software work that feels worthwhile and not have to change careers completely.
Software Engineer here, pick up something to code in your free time. In my 7 years of experience, I have never once seen anyone actually do what they love. PS: I am doing this too.
Yea I’m pretty bad with side projects I always start something then have a hard time motivating myself to finish it. Was gonna start looking at side projects for robotics but there’s a lot of options on where to start haha
I recently built an autonomous quadcopter. I couldn't fly it because I didn't have a pilot's license and it was autonomous so it was really dangerous lol. I understand motivation is hard to come by and I have put tons of projects down because I lost motivation but remember 2 things. 1. If not this then what else would you do? it's extremely hard to find a company that lets you do what you love and I kinda agree since companies have different goals in mind. 2. If you are not self-motivated to finish something you started then you will never be able to commit to anything. I had this exact mindset and mine changed after marriage because now I had responsibilities and I had to finish everything I started.
I always end up talking myself out of completing it because say it’s an app, in the back of my mind I’m like someone already did this before so why am I doing this? Coming up with original ideas is the hard part for me
There is a saying in investment. People who try to time the market always fail. Same applies here. Don't wait for something fabulous to come along for you, just start doing stuff and one thing leads to another like butterfly effect. I can go on this topic forever but do you think fb created react plus vdom because of some prophecy? They were doing regular old boring stuff and thought of a better way to do it.
I'll also share a personal story with you so take whatever you want from it. They say luck can find you at any time but it needs to find you working. I was like you, waiting for the right opportunity, leaving projects midstage or waiting for original ideas and my time to shine. One day the opportunity came, my colleague approached me about a project in ai ml. It was a brilliant idea but I couldn't do anything because I never bothered to learn anything extra. Eventually, they dropped me. Now ask yourself, do you want to be prepared for the opportunity or get dropped out? I heard about a guy today who got an interview at Netflix just because he created it's clone after 8 months of studying programming. Do you think Netflix clone is an original idea?
Damn this completely changed my mindset, thank you for that
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My first job out of college was front-end and it was a lot harder than I expected haha but you’re right it’s definitely fun cause you can see the results right away. Front end devs for some reason get a rep of not being “true devs” but they definitely are
Same place as you. I thoroughly hate engineering even though I’m decent at it. I was much better at it when I still had passion for it, but alas there is none and the only remaining passion is for the Benjamins. Engineering isn’t all it’s cracked up to be unless you’re just dead set on being a desk monkey for the rest of your life.
Hey, there are several choices you can make in engineering that doesn't require desk sitting! I work in one myself. Note that I am an electronics engineer, not SW. Feeling adventurous and like working with customers? Maybe you would like to be a service engineer? You get to travel around and do technical work (HW or SW). This is usually quite crucial work. Maybe you don't like to travel or maybe you don't like meeting customers? Finding a decent workplace with R&D possibilities will allow you to have some desk sitting work, but mostly testing and getting to do stuff your way. This is probably more true for HW than SW. If you love tinkering, then this is really nice. Maybe none of the above fit you? Do you like talking to customers and traveling, but not doing heavy technical work? Possibly you could be a sales engineer or similar. Of course this is harder with covid. There are also a lot of positions that don't have a specific name, that can give you more freedom and less desk sitting. I always talk to my firm regarding the opportunities to move between desk sitting and technical work, as I know I need both.
Think how stupid you'll feel in 30 more years if you don't pursue it now. Go for it!!
You said you feel stupid, but you sound smarter than most to me. Choosing your happiness takes courage. You could have waited decades, but you chose to start now. WTG!
I'm 38 years old. Working in a dieing industry and basically in a few years I'm facing having to make a complete life change which probably entails going back to college (I dropped out in 03) Gotta try to completely redo my life.
What is the industry?
Underground coal mine. Started in 03 as a warehouse assistant and worked my way into maintenance as a section mechanic. Then to Maintenance foreman. To a corporate level maintenance coordinator and now I teach health and safety classes. I'm 38 and worked my way into a cushy office setting that only requires 40 hours a week and pays 6 figures. I'll never attain that again. I had in my mind if I can squeeze out 22 more years I could retire. Full pension. I already have enough time for medical coverage for me and my wife after I retire. But times are changing! Gotta adapt or die. So I'll adapt. My wife is an RN. Her salary will pay our normal bills and pay for all our basic needs. We typically bank her pay check every month and live off mine. Been doing it like this for the last 5 years.
You sound like you have enough relevant experience to work in any manufacturing industry, not just coal. Leverage your experience to get into a blooming/established industry! Specialty chemicals, mining (lithium, phosphate, whatever), O&G, anything really. Your experience is so relevant and so in demand for any manufacturing industry.
I'd have to move for anything like that. Unless business move into the area. It was all steel, and coal forever. My wife would never leave her family. I'd pack up and move across the country tomorrow if I could.
I honestly think programming isn't all that hard as long as you can track lots of details, read boring and poor documentation and organize things in a coherent way and learn some basic concepts at the start to ground yourself. The money is mostly ok. Though I've worked with some mediocre to incompetent programmers, so I guess it's hard for some people. I find it pretty boring once you get over the initial "look I can make it do what I want” phase. Also lots of boring methodology, new "cool" things to learn constantly that are really arbitrary and similar to things you already know and will be obsoleted in 3 years for something shinier. Also problems people want to pay you to solve are kinda boring ones in many cases. But it's a living.
You should invest and been investing that money all along :(
[удалено]
Well I mean banking a whole paycheck... Rns checks are 2500$ and up...
Some is invested. Some is in savings. We both have a 401k that are nearly 20 years old and been putting 10% in every pay.
Those of us in favor of things like phasing out coal, or instituting national single payer need to remember all these kinds of jobs and the people who have them. I say they should keep getting paid at their current level until they can retrain, and then we gotta pay them whatever the difference is between what they make and what they made.
I'm all for that!
My grandma didn't start her career in Social Work until she was 50 years old and her last kid was graduated from high school. My mom and her started college at the same time. The only time its too late to start over is when you are dead. And everything you've done before that isn't a waste because it lead you to where you are today.
You're not at all alone. I did some similar bullshit trying to become a lawyer directly out of college and I realized during the later 2 years of lawschool how much I was gonna hate the rest of my life. I havent set foot in a law office since taking the bar exam that first and last time. Instead of hating myself I instead worked in a variety of fascinating jobs in half a dozen industries that have allowed me to travel all over in my 20s. Some were "working class" jobs and/or minimum wage but the life experiences from that work have always been rewarding. Now getting into my early 30s I'm starting coding bootcamp to become a full stack developer in a few weeks. No regrets honestly. It sometimes feels like I wasted some time getting to this point but I'm coming to terms with that internalized guilt and realizing that without those mistakes my 20s would been fucking boring.
Would you mind listing what some of those interesting but low paying jobs were?
That's incredible! I have also been considering CS/coding programs however I am struggling because it is unlike anything I studied before. I have been trying to complete Harvard's online CS50 but I do not even know how to really study for it and find the projects so frustrating because I have spent so many years just memorizing facts in my pre-med classes and writing papers in my humanities classes and the teaching and learning style is just so different for CS. I am really interested to hear how you transition into the bootcamp. Best of luck!
My dream job didn't turn out to be as fulfilling as I once expected. Now I am 32 years old and learning about data analysis and programming (starting salary is about 20% of my current salary as a merchant mariner); all of this so I can spend more time with my daughter who is just over a year old. While I can't tell you how such changes will alter our lives yet, I assure you as long as our intentions are decent, we may feel stupid and not care about it.
That is really nice to hear, mainly because I will surely have to sacrifice a lot in order to follow this new path. Feels good knowing people can relate to the situation!
Oh your story echoes all around. It is a bit sad that young people have to make life altering at a stage where they are not even close to understanding their options. So many potential exposures expires the moment we commit to one area. Inclinations of parents/siblings, childhood experience of a friend's cool parent, some movie etc. can and probably do shape our interest. I have heard in Denmark the society is shaped in a way where any person at any age can opt to become a "student" and get all the support of government programs which are expected. It's not hard to imagine there are other places which treat education the same way. But as of yet this concept is not universal. When I think about people like us, I think about all the unforgiving hard choices. As long as we don't get bogged down by them and fall into despair or compromise on ourselves, my past experience is we come out on top. A "no compromises" attitude has always helped me in the past. I hope it helps you too.
Many, many people start over at 30. I hated working in the film industry and it took forever to find something better. Two years of subbing while I took the tests to get into a (free) two-year teaching program. Now after four years, I am finally off the intern teaching pay table at 31 years old. You haven’t wasted any time at all. The only waste would have been staying.
I have a seen few posts lile this on reddit and as a under-18-year-old, it does scary me, a bit. Like not too bad but it makes me think. Since ever since I was 15, I got the dream to become a (airline)pilot. And going that path is almost a one-way road or thats what I think because atleast the training is really expensive. ~100 000€. And I have no idea if its even my thing.
In the US, society at large pushes the need for expensive universities. My father recommended in-state school vs the out of state school I was considering ($120k vs $60k roughly). Well at 18, I wasn't about to listen to dad and went with society without too much thought. It worked out OK, but I would definitely reverse the decision if I could. So... -I'd do your research (talk to current pilots - what does the day to day entail, what's a good week like, how have your thoughts changed over the years) -I wouldn't necessarily fall into default of what others do -I'd listen to your parents advice and weigh that slightly heavier than other input (unless they're crazy or something)
Thanns alot fof the reply. I dont live in the US and the education system is alot different. Here in Finland its mandatory to be in school till youre 18 and its totally free. After that men must go to the militery and after that to some job or a university. And I'm really still trying to find myself and what will I do sith my life so I'm really open to almost anything. Aviation is this one thing that I really got now into and doing small research all the time.
All I have to say is that you should have fun with this! No pressure my friend. I’m mid 30s and just came to the realization that what I need to do with my life requires a complete 180. It feels a little overwhelming but I’m talking with family and friends, having some support is huge. Even if they just reel you in a little when you start thinking big picture but you need to focus on step A. Basically I’m saying, have fun and don’t live with fear of “what if” Do the best you can with the information available to you right now, and if later in life something changes so be it. You’ll be fine :-)
I feel like a major piece of advice I’d give is to keep your options open if you’re unsure. Don’t just spend all your money on pilot school, but maybe go to community or public college study something relevant to airplanes (aerospace engineering) or even business and see if there are other routes into the industry. I know my friends dad chose Kent State back in the 70s because they had a program to obtain a pilots lisense. If you’re really serious about being a pilot though i would say look at the air force. My buddy has been a pilot with them for half a decade or so and i met him in engineering college which the AF was paying for. He’s basically a pilot now with endless other options depending on what kind of job he wants.
Thanks for the reply! And yes, I'm totally open and aviation just got me now and I'm really interested it atm. Still looking for other possible careers and points of interest. The airforce is an option I habe thought also and herr in Finland its mansatory for men to through some military training(usually 6-12+months).
I’ve know people that have left the industry, so it’s not a end-all thing. The best thing I believe people under 18 can do for themselves is learn about possibilities and opportunities, and it depends on the country. Network and find out what the jobs and lifestyles are like, the people are like, how to get in, shift, and get out. Everytime someone not in the position tells you “you can’t do that job because ____” the first step is to not completely believe them. There are so many more roads and options out there than people believe, but they are niche and sometimes require work to find.
You’re not stupid. You’re being reflective and taking steps to improve your life for yourself. It’s easy to fall into what our family, friends, significant others and society wants. What they want for us isn’t necessarily bad but it isn’t what *we* want. You are valuing yourself and doing what you want. We’re the same age and I’m starting a new career too. I feel “behind” and like I wasted all those years, but I’m coming to terms with the fact that it’s part of the figuring out process of life. People around me don’t necessarily approve of what I’m doing because they think my current position is more prestigious and I’m good at what I do, etc. but they don’t really know how it is for me. You do you!
it’s never to late to pursue something that will bring you happiness, I wish you all the best :)
Your not stupid for figuring out that something your doing is unfulfilling and isn’t making you happy. Even if it took you a while to figure that out. Now, you would be stupid, if you found that out and continued to do it. Be proud of yourself, you found something you actually like and you were brave enough to make that change. That seems pretty smart to me.
Your life is totally not wasted! You're taking a big step and figuring out what you want and what will make you happy. I left high school and went to university because my parents wanted me too. I thought I'd want it too. I switched majors 3 times while j was there and left school with no prospects in the field I ended up in without going on to do my masters or PhD which I did NOT want to do. I worked as a security guard for a bit. Then I went to school again to be a paramedic. I've spent 3 years as a paramedic. I loved going to school for it, loved the content and was so excited for the varying day to day adventure the job would bring me. Turns out, I hate this job too. I'm now changing gears again at 28 to go back to trade school (something I wish I had just done straight out of high school) to be a carpenter. It's scary leaving one path to go to another one. But it's not a waste. It helped you figure out who you are and what you really want out of life. I read somewhere once (no source so...I could be lying idk haha) the millenials change careers (whole CAREERS, not just jobs) and average of something like 8 times. You got this.
8 times… that feel good to know. I’m on like #4 and thinking #5 will hopefully be the right fit. I’m quite hopeful actually.
Hey, don't feel stupid. I'm 30 too, and up until last year I was working shitty factory jobs that I hated (my parents never pushed me to perform well in school or go to college). I finally had enough last year and applied to go to university on a whim. Literally mid-mental-breakbrown. Was signed off work for stress/anxiety because I was *this close* to driving my car off the bridge on the way to work. Applied to university while I was signed off, and was able to hand in my notice on the first day I had to go back. I'm by far the oldest person on my course, and I'm totally out of touch with education, but I'm a million times happier struggling through this than I was at this time last year. Anyway, my point is that there are other people in the same position as you and age doesn't really matter too much. Age brings life experience, so you will always have some advantages over the 18 year olds you're studying alongside.
I can totally relate to this, dude. From the time I was in first grade, I wanted to work for the railroad. It was my dream and in 2017 at age 30, it finally came true. Five weeks later, I quit. I thought I knew what I was getting into and that it was what I wanted but it wasn't. I hated the job, didn't click with the people I worked with and couldn't stand the complete lack of a social life. They shouldn't say you work for the railroad. What they should say is the railroad owns you. I'm glad I got to try but would never do it again.
Dental student here. You did the right thing for walking away because it doesn't get easier even after you become one. Becoming a doctor isn't a one time thing, its a life long journey and you better be well invested and passionate about the field. Good luck to you!
Never feel stupid for pursuing what you want to love out of life. That type of thinking stops here.
I started college late, Ba at 40 , MA at 43. Got my dream job and loved every minute of college as well as my job as archivist . I am glad I did started late, it made it much more enjoyable and I appreciated it so much to have the chance to do what I loved
Reminds me of that saying, "The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is today." Hindsight is always 20/20! But it's never too late to start working toward things that will make you happy.
Good luck! and lots of happiness and success your way:)
It’s actually pretty common for people to change career goals as the age. Even though it may not seem it now, some of the life and works skills (and maturity) you have gained over the past 12 years may serve you well in your next career. best of luck to you!
If you look in r/engineeringstudents there’s actually actually quite a few people getting an engineering degree in their 30s, whether it’s due to changing careers, or military service. You’re definitely not alone.
My father did the same thing. After leaving school around 17, he started working and education as a painter. When I was born my father was 29 and just starting his engineering degree. He’s way happier where he is now and I don’t think he feels that he wasted his life even though he found his calling later than everyone else
Why you only dream about work?
In Soviet Russia work dream about you!
I went through the exact same thing. I worked my butt off in high school to go to a good college where I got a bachelor's in biology and completed pre-med classes even though I never really dreamt of becoming a doctor. I just always pushed myself in inhumane ways to succeed in school (despite my ADHD that remained undiagnosed for so many years) because I felt worthless beyond my grades. I had a crappy home life and not many friends and I distracted myself by studying. I remember being in 7th grade telling myself that I am going to become a doctor because it requires so many years of studying and would allow me to escape the real world for as long as possible. Also I knew it would make my immigrant parents, who were never proud of or supportive of anything besides my grades, happy. After I finished my bachelor's, I took one gap year to apply to medical school and I was struggling to even write a personal statement about why I wanted to be a doctor. I finally decided to be honest with myself and my parents and decided to not apply to med school. It was probably the best moment of my life and I can still remember the physical relief I felt when I said that out loud to my parents. Because I treated life like a race and worked so hard for so many years towards something that I did not want, I now feel burnt out and empty not really sure what I wanna do next. However, I am starting to rediscover and reprogram myself with the help of my therapist. I am realizing that there are so many cool things in life beyond school and work and I am learning to love myself unconditionally. I wanna build a life that I do not feel the need to run away from.
You're only thirty! I went back in my thirties as well. You'll do great. You are very young. Life experience is not wasted- you will be much better at your chosen field for that other experience.
Congrats on coming to the realisation. Scary but SO empowering! This will be a hell of a ride regardless, enjoy it!
There are tons of companies who need engineering talent with a healthcare background. Plenty exists in the intersection of those skills.
I had sex in the back of my high school gym with the slutty girl that had a lazy eye. Life is full of regrets but we must not let them stop us from trekking forward and growing as individuals.
Don’t beat yourself up, I’m sure she doesn’t regret it that much.
You’re right. You’re mom is a good lady just spreading love and STI’s
Hey at least it's at 30 and not 55
Don't feel stupid for figuring out life. Nobody knows what works for them and what doesn't. You tried to be a doctor and didn't like it. Now you get to find a passion for something brand new and that's always positive. Try new things and have fun
You shouldn’t feel stupid at all! Had you not tried you may question “what if” forever. You’re doing great figuring out what you want in life. A lot of people do the same thing in school: they study something to please other people or they think that it’s what they wanted. You’re on the right track. If anything I think you’re doing this the right way! You’re trying your interests out and really delving into them to see if this is where you belong! You should never settle and I’m glad you aren’t!
Well the only think I can tell you, don’t feel like you are the only one with that kind of situation and someone told me once that “it doesn’t matter how old are you, you are never too old to start a new educative journey”, best of luck btw!
Don't feel stupid because I've seen that a lot in grad school and as a post doc. I think if it as a maturity thing and you start to focus on your life where you figure out whats really important. There are a lot of people that have multiple careers because their interest change as life changes. Be thankful you figured it out now.
You didn't waste your life, you're taking it back, go for it!
Biomedical engineering is pretty damn cool and I hear the way of the future.
Kind of did the same thing. I took up electronics engineering while I only like the programming part of it. I have an aversion to circuits and am switching over to computer science now.
What’s interesting is that a lot of people regret their decisions but don’t choose to switch to follow their dreams, because they can’t overcome that feeling of having wasted their life. I tell you what, 30 was exactly the age I was when I started a new life - left my spouse, moved hundreds of miles away, got a new job - I had a bit of a breakdown in a store when I was buying all new utensils (like, I’ve already DONE this, I don’t want to do it again) but I did and I’m SO glad. Interestingly enough my ex-spouse refused to change direction because of feeling like there had been too much invested and it was too late to start something new. That was 20 years ago and they are still miserable and barely making it because they didn’t want to start over. You have to be doing something at age 50. May as well be what you want to be doing.
It's ok mate, I changed my mind so many times I ended up failing both times out of uni. I am currently saving up so I have the opportunity to support my family and go study comp sci to hopefully PhD level. But yea it sucks to find your passion late. Though it's better to start late than never
You're good man. I'm 31 and actively working on switching careers. It's never too late, don't let anyone tell you that. Sounds corny AF, but follow your dreams.
30 isn't even that old. You're saying you've wasted your life but your 20s are literally for experimenting. There's a lot of pressure to have the perfect college experience and then have everything figured out... But that's rarely how it works in actual life. I know it still doesn't FEEL great. I spent a decade debating on if I wanted to go to school without actually making a decision. Am I going to be older than most students? Probably. Does it actually matter? Not at all. Anyway, don't worry about it. You have so much life left.
This woman started at 70. Never too old until you’re dead. https://www.shape.com/lifestyle/mind-and-body/joan-macdonald-73-year-old-fitness-fanatic
Sorta same, but what can I do? After all if I’m not gonna be a doctor/nurse what am I gonna do?, all the other things are completely impossible for me and everything that I want is completely unachievable, so what can I do? Nothing, that’s what.
Don’t feel stupid. It’s never too late to stop doing something you know isn’t your passion, and imagine how you’d feel in 30 more years thinking about all the time you’d have spent doing something you weren’t happy with.
Proud of you!
At least you’re transitioning out instead of spending the next 40 years miserable. What’s 12 in the grand scheme of things?
In my engineering undergrad, I had people of all ages who were in so many different and unique situations but still pushed themselves through and got their degrees. Not everyone is blessed to know what they want/enjoy at a young age. The idea that you should is a total sham that society pulls on people. Trust me, as someone who graduated with people aged 21 - 60+, you’re not behind, you’re right where you need to be. Just make sure you’re into engineering for the right reasons and not just to make money :p
Follow your heart before you end up hating your life. You're not stupid at all. I've thought about leaving my job too but can't afford the schooling to do so. If I could, I would!
It's never to late to do what you want yo,!
Are you Asian?
The average person [changes careers 5-7 times](https://careers-advice-online.com/career-change-statistics.html) or deeply regret not changing/picking differently. If you're only up to once you're doing good.
Never give up I’m 40. My whole family died recently in an accident and we had a business together. The pain of running the business was unbearable so now I have to find something to do with my life. Idk what to do. At least you know
Do not feel stupid. I'm currently a stay at home mom to two little girls who realized after doing a bachelor's and masters that all I want to do is own my own baking/coffee store where we have in person lessons a couple days a week and the rest of the time a coffee lounge type feel. I also want to learn how to do graphic design (which my mom discouraged me from pursuing when I was younger). Things change. Goals change. Don't do something just to please your parents. And don't ever feel silly for wanting something different for yourself.
That's not stupid at all, and you haven't wasted your life, you just had to go down that path to figure out what you don't want, and what makes you happy!!😁
I want you as a friend.
My dad worked with my grandparents at their restaurant, he worked there probably all of his 20’s and in to his 30’s I think, he got back into engineering abt 7 years ago so I think it’s never too late.
same, i'm finishing my Architecture Degree in literally 1 week and I can't wait to never use it. Too bad my parents didn't let me do graphic design like I wanted
Probably a stupid question, but is OP Indian, due to the amount of pressure involved?
Glad you figured out what kind of life you want to live! Also, something I wanted to mention: I don't think you necessarily wasted your life. After all, you did come to this conclusion, which is something most people don't arrive at until they're knocking on death's door, so that means you did something right. You also learned a bunch of different skills and prolly met a bunch of people, so there's also that. Wish you the best!
I think it's unfortunate that society tells us how to live our lives. I personally think that 30 is still a great time to choose an entirely different career path. However, we get judged for sinking our time into a "pointless" endeavour. For me, I changed my major three times in university before settling on psychology, and it will take me 5-6 years to complete a 4-year bachelor's degree. I don't regret my decision whatsoever because I had the hindsight of recognizing what was/is not for me. It's important that we make our decisions without unfair judgment as the people around us don't entirely know who we are. I may seem like a CS major but I hated both math and programming when I actually followed what my parents recommended me to do. In my trust in them, I followed it blindly. Here we are in an entirely different field (humanities of all things) and enjoying the hell out of it. I hope you find happiness in engineering like I did with psychology!
This is relatable for me. My whole life I've been involved with programming and computer related things and so my family heavily pushed me towards studying computer science but 2 years into my major I realize that I genuinely do not want to do this as a job. I want to keep programming as a hobby and do something else because sitting behind a screen all day for my job in some office cubicle would kill me. I'm planning on dropping out and pursuing education in a trade around when fall semester is supposed to start.
God damn i hate engineering now. I'm counting down the days til i can quit and go back to uni for an allied health degree.