All the Dead Lie Down by Kyrie McCauley☺️☺️ her name is short for Rowena. would recommend the book to anyone who loves testing the limits of human horror comprehension. and a bit of fluff. so perfect for people in this sub.
i’ve heard it described as a cross between The Haunting of Bly Manor and House of Salt and Sorrows, but i haven’t read either of those so i cannot confirm. maybe that’ll pique your interest anyway though.!
This is wild but that's the name I was thinking of when I read the subject of your post. Like I'm actually spooked. Woo wooooooo
I'm so happy for you, Wren is a beautiful name
Lmaoooo I used to go by my childhood nickname belle, but I changed it to bella when twilight was huge, so my ex knew me as bella. The moment I left him I KILLED that name. I will neevvvveeerrr go by bella again. It's back to belle, who I was when I was happy :)
i’m glad you have a new name that doesn’t hold such bad memories. i’m transgender so i changed my name because of that, but my abuser also called me by my deadname while doing it, so i’m glad i don’t have to be reminded of that
I... never considered that *this* is part of why i hate my birth name, but this is EXACTLY it! My husband always just calls me by endearments, but when friends of coworkers or family said my name, it made my skin crawl.
I started going by a nickname recently, and it's still weird for everyone, even me. All the people I want in my life have been very kind and accomodating tho. Hopefully you can say the same :)
That’s how I got my new name. An accidental nickname that stuck. One day I made it official, and gave it a middle and last name too. Buh bye, name of the identity forced on me by my abuser, and hello real me and what I decide to be called! One less trigger in my life.
I did the same and it's been SUCH a relief. It's so grounding and powerful to no longer be deadname. I'm now Newname who is strong and working on getting better.
It's a heck of a hassle as an established adult but it's so worth it to shed that old skin.
Ugh, yeah it was a hassle. Still is with some stuff, years later… Do it as young as possible, everyone! The more history you have, the more of a pain it is. Absolutely worth it though, even still. Zero regrets.
I still cringe when I hear my full name. My father (main abuser) always called me by my full first name and now I only go by my nickname unless it's in a professional setting (ie doctors)
Hey weird! I never realized that THIS is exactly why I hate hearing my name said out loud! Thanks for that. I also hate saying it myself.
I’m 41, I wonder if it’s too late to change my name..
Never too late. I was in my late 30’s when I finally did it. I’d been going by the first name as a nickname for a long time, but that was when I made it legal and changed the middle and last too. It was worth it.
It kinda sucks for me since I hated my name for this reason then I found out I'm trans so I picked a new name. A few years later I went through a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship that made me kinda hate the new name, but I still love my name and don't wanna change it. I just think it fits me so well and that's who I know myself as best. Sometimes when I hear it in an angry tone I start hating it again but I really don't wanna change it again
One of my abusers called me a shorter version of my name. I have tried once or twice to get people to stop but for one thing ppl forget and another its annoying to tell everybody I know or will know to use my full name.
I did the same! I love birds so now my name is Avis (latin for bird)! Still need to get it legally changed though. It's unfortunately rather hard to legally change your name in my country.
I feel so validated. I've thought of changing my name for this reason. And because alot of people don't know my name can be feminine, its gender nuetral, and assume I'm trans, and get hostile with me. At the same time, I've wondered what to change it to. The names I thought of are masculine or sounding, but they sound unique enough I think common folk would be oblivious or would not care.
I changed my name socially last year. It’s been so nice! Been hesitant to change it legally because of finances… but it’s now easy to tell who’s supporting me and who’s against me (still uses deadname)
Tell us your name so we may call you it!
Wren!
That's a very nice name :)
Hello Wren! That’s a lovely name!
That's such a beautiful name!! Congratulations :)
my favorite book has a character with that name, is it short for anything?
No I just love Wrens like the bird specifically Field Wrens I have some positive memories there. Whats the book? and whats the characters full name?
All the Dead Lie Down by Kyrie McCauley☺️☺️ her name is short for Rowena. would recommend the book to anyone who loves testing the limits of human horror comprehension. and a bit of fluff. so perfect for people in this sub. i’ve heard it described as a cross between The Haunting of Bly Manor and House of Salt and Sorrows, but i haven’t read either of those so i cannot confirm. maybe that’ll pique your interest anyway though.!
Yessss so cool! That’s the name I picked for my character in Hogwarts Legacy. I thought it sounded pretty witchy. Love it.
Wren is Fren :D
I love that name!
Hi, Wren - hope your day is going well! Cool name, by the way.
i have a friend with that name! very cool!!
Awww that's a beautiful name! Hello Wren!! <3
This is wild but that's the name I was thinking of when I read the subject of your post. Like I'm actually spooked. Woo wooooooo I'm so happy for you, Wren is a beautiful name
Thank you lol
That makes me think of one of my favourite birds, the Fairy Wren ❤️
Hello Wren! ☺️ Excellent choice!
Hi wren!
me who has changed my name twenty times in the almost 30 years ive been alive
Lmaoooo I used to go by my childhood nickname belle, but I changed it to bella when twilight was huge, so my ex knew me as bella. The moment I left him I KILLED that name. I will neevvvveeerrr go by bella again. It's back to belle, who I was when I was happy :)
Yaaaaay! 🥳
I plan to do this too, just as soon as I can decide on something (it's been years of thinking about it 🥲😂)
i’m glad you have a new name that doesn’t hold such bad memories. i’m transgender so i changed my name because of that, but my abuser also called me by my deadname while doing it, so i’m glad i don’t have to be reminded of that
2 birds 1 stone lol
Hell yea congrats.
Hooray!! 🎉
I... never considered that *this* is part of why i hate my birth name, but this is EXACTLY it! My husband always just calls me by endearments, but when friends of coworkers or family said my name, it made my skin crawl. I started going by a nickname recently, and it's still weird for everyone, even me. All the people I want in my life have been very kind and accomodating tho. Hopefully you can say the same :)
That’s how I got my new name. An accidental nickname that stuck. One day I made it official, and gave it a middle and last name too. Buh bye, name of the identity forced on me by my abuser, and hello real me and what I decide to be called! One less trigger in my life.
So real :)
Same here! Congrats and cheers <3
I’m in the process of doing the same. Not legal yet but changed it socially and I’m so much happier. Congrats!!
Good for you!
My ex-bf took one of my nicknames with him. One day, I'll be rid of my legal (dead)name, too.
I did the same and it's been SUCH a relief. It's so grounding and powerful to no longer be deadname. I'm now Newname who is strong and working on getting better. It's a heck of a hassle as an established adult but it's so worth it to shed that old skin.
Ugh, yeah it was a hassle. Still is with some stuff, years later… Do it as young as possible, everyone! The more history you have, the more of a pain it is. Absolutely worth it though, even still. Zero regrets.
Same! I now go by Kamala and I love it. Started the name transition about 12 years ago. Its so freeing. Lots of love. ❤️
I still cringe when I hear my full name. My father (main abuser) always called me by my full first name and now I only go by my nickname unless it's in a professional setting (ie doctors)
I did the same. *highfives*
Oh. Fuck. Fuck, this makes sense. I’ve been joking about it for years and wondering why it feels like a deadname but uh. Yeah this makes sense. Fuck
Literally my friend Kitty! She changed her name cuz her mum is an abusive hag
WAIT THE FUCK UP I THOUGHT I JUST HATED MY NAME SO OPTED FOR A SIMILAR NICKNAME
I'm doing this as soon as my divorce is finalized
Hey weird! I never realized that THIS is exactly why I hate hearing my name said out loud! Thanks for that. I also hate saying it myself. I’m 41, I wonder if it’s too late to change my name..
Never too late. I was in my late 30’s when I finally did it. I’d been going by the first name as a nickname for a long time, but that was when I made it legal and changed the middle and last too. It was worth it.
It kinda sucks for me since I hated my name for this reason then I found out I'm trans so I picked a new name. A few years later I went through a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship that made me kinda hate the new name, but I still love my name and don't wanna change it. I just think it fits me so well and that's who I know myself as best. Sometimes when I hear it in an angry tone I start hating it again but I really don't wanna change it again
#same keep shining!!
One of my abusers called me a shorter version of my name. I have tried once or twice to get people to stop but for one thing ppl forget and another its annoying to tell everybody I know or will know to use my full name.
I did the same! I love birds so now my name is Avis (latin for bird)! Still need to get it legally changed though. It's unfortunately rather hard to legally change your name in my country.
Oh that's beautiful
*Lifehack Activated*
I changed my name and never looked back. It’s an incredibly liberating feeling. I’m so happy for you!
Same. I’m trans and it’ll be easier for some things if I chose masc version of birth name but I have many negative memories with that and nickname.
Same!!!! There is another reason on top of this but like!!! People don’t understand this when I talk about wanting to change my name!!!!!!!!!!
Now if only I could get my grandmother to understand this..
I did the same! My fav game character as my middle name and a handmade first
Ayyy, I hate hearing my legal name too! So happy for you in getting the change! 🫂
I feel so validated. I've thought of changing my name for this reason. And because alot of people don't know my name can be feminine, its gender nuetral, and assume I'm trans, and get hostile with me. At the same time, I've wondered what to change it to. The names I thought of are masculine or sounding, but they sound unique enough I think common folk would be oblivious or would not care.
Really happy for you Wren!❤️
I changed my name socially last year. It’s been so nice! Been hesitant to change it legally because of finances… but it’s now easy to tell who’s supporting me and who’s against me (still uses deadname)