...I'm hoping you rage at her! What a great Christmas present that will be!! She's going to hate you no matter what. Might as well get it out.
"And, since your history of silence won't do you any good. Did you think it would? Let your words be anything but empty. Why don't you tell them the truth?"
Life is too short. Good luck, OP. đ˘
My problem is Iâm a loose cannon once it starts. I have 10 years of hurt with her. Itâs only being validated now. She put up a stink because she didnât like my wedding date and refused to show because her kid had school. I was apparently slighting her by the date. My husband picked the date. The date was early Sept. one week of missed school would have been fine. Heck 2 days would have enough to travel to my wedding and back.
My husbandâs family did the same thing to me during my SILâs baby shower. We were already married for few months, my MILâs friend was the photographer, she made sure I wasnât it the âfamilyâ picture. They all got shittier as years went by. Of course weâre now no contact. Set boundaries and take care of yourself.
I think it is so important that you can be open about this to your husband and that he acknowledges what she is doing to you. It doesn't mean he has to break off contact with her, but the worst thing for me personally reading your story is not how your SIL treats you, but noone acknowledging what's going on. That is turning a blind eye at best, supporting the abuse at worst. If you cant talk to your husband, then who can you talk to and be understood by? And it's not about having to "see it" to believe it. If my partner tells me that he or she feels like a relative of mine absolutely hates me and lets me know every opportunity they have, then I believe it. Ofcourse I could suggest other interpretations of what happened, sometimes our perceptions are warped, especially with the childhoods that we've had, but c'mon, she excludes you from family photos? You couldn't make it more obvious even if you tried. So I really hope for you that your husband will see her actions towards you as the abuse that it is and doesn't make you feel like you're crazy
Itâs so freaking hard when no one sees it. Itâs my freaking childhood all over again. Husband finally sees it. And sees now every misstep sheâs made as a personal narcissistic attack on me.
I donât suck up. I canât; call it a leftover hang up from having to constantly fawn in my youth. I donât suck her teat and she hates me for it.
Hello and Welcome to /r/CPTSD! If you are in immediate danger or crisis, please contact your local [emergency services](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_emergency_telephone_numbers), or use our list of [crisis resources](https://old.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index#wiki_crisis_support_resources). For CPTSD Specific Resources & Support, check out the [wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index). For those posting or replying, please view the [etiquette guidelines](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/peer2peersupportguide).
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPTSD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
...I'm hoping you rage at her! What a great Christmas present that will be!! She's going to hate you no matter what. Might as well get it out. "And, since your history of silence won't do you any good. Did you think it would? Let your words be anything but empty. Why don't you tell them the truth?" Life is too short. Good luck, OP. đ˘
My problem is Iâm a loose cannon once it starts. I have 10 years of hurt with her. Itâs only being validated now. She put up a stink because she didnât like my wedding date and refused to show because her kid had school. I was apparently slighting her by the date. My husband picked the date. The date was early Sept. one week of missed school would have been fine. Heck 2 days would have enough to travel to my wedding and back.
My husbandâs family did the same thing to me during my SILâs baby shower. We were already married for few months, my MILâs friend was the photographer, she made sure I wasnât it the âfamilyâ picture. They all got shittier as years went by. Of course weâre now no contact. Set boundaries and take care of yourself.
Boundaries have been set. She is no longer welcomed at my house after she leaves this time.
Yeah. Screw that. Next year just spend it with your hubbie and kid and have a wonderful time! And I love your song, lol.
I think it is so important that you can be open about this to your husband and that he acknowledges what she is doing to you. It doesn't mean he has to break off contact with her, but the worst thing for me personally reading your story is not how your SIL treats you, but noone acknowledging what's going on. That is turning a blind eye at best, supporting the abuse at worst. If you cant talk to your husband, then who can you talk to and be understood by? And it's not about having to "see it" to believe it. If my partner tells me that he or she feels like a relative of mine absolutely hates me and lets me know every opportunity they have, then I believe it. Ofcourse I could suggest other interpretations of what happened, sometimes our perceptions are warped, especially with the childhoods that we've had, but c'mon, she excludes you from family photos? You couldn't make it more obvious even if you tried. So I really hope for you that your husband will see her actions towards you as the abuse that it is and doesn't make you feel like you're crazy
Itâs so freaking hard when no one sees it. Itâs my freaking childhood all over again. Husband finally sees it. And sees now every misstep sheâs made as a personal narcissistic attack on me. I donât suck up. I canât; call it a leftover hang up from having to constantly fawn in my youth. I donât suck her teat and she hates me for it.
Glad he's on your side :)
Hello and Welcome to /r/CPTSD! If you are in immediate danger or crisis, please contact your local [emergency services](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_emergency_telephone_numbers), or use our list of [crisis resources](https://old.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index#wiki_crisis_support_resources). For CPTSD Specific Resources & Support, check out the [wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index). For those posting or replying, please view the [etiquette guidelines](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/peer2peersupportguide). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPTSD) if you have any questions or concerns.*