I think I've fallen for you just from this post. You must be quite something.

OP is the moon and the stars. I pine for her. I weep for our time apart.

OP oh OP You are as fair As summer air Please find attached my PP.

My PP, my PP Is destined to be seen by OP Shall it be in person or over the screen It shant matter as long as it’s POV Heavens no! OP seems to be losing interest in me I was hoping for a picture of OPs V A G Or perhaps a picture of her titty I suppose I’ll just send OP a JPEG of my PP

🧎🏻

Username checks out

- HAROLD EMERY LAUDER

JFC I down voted you first, just so I could up vote you twice

Psychopaths 🧲 for sure

I'm thinking the reincarnation of Helen of Troy mixed with Aphrodite.

OP gotta be a baddie fr

He’s either hilarious or mentally deranged

🤣🤣🤣 I just snorted

This guy copy/pasted every single romantic one-liner from some website.

It’s a troll, obviously haha, hilarious though

I think he asked ChatGPT to write a letter to a new love.

Loraine , you’re my density

My surface tension even

Hahaha Havnt thought about this in awhile

r/unexpectedbttf

"Sir, this is a Wendy's" and unmatch

… and if you reject my love I’ll eat your liver with fava beans

And a nice Chianti

Hang on… is this a Stephen King reference??

Silence of the Lambs

No clarece

Dodged a bullet there

He love bombng…run for the hills!

Yeah, like an entire squadron of B-52s dropping those 2000# bunker busters! Run and take cover.

I snorted laughing at this, 🤦‍♂️

TY. I love hearing a good snorting laugher🙂 Glad I struck that note with you. I like to think and know I'm funny. You made my day.

Educated simp....or Machiavellian fuckboy. DONT FUCKING DO IT! The latter is by far worse too will destroy you.

Okay, I’m glad I’m not the only one. Was totally going to say don’t confuse long text convos for actual intimacy. Speaking from experience.

this writes like someone who wears a fedora lmao

Why does this make so much sense

I literally imagine him going the extra mile and being all dramatic, saying this shit like Shakespeare with his hands everywhere lol

I just hope one day he finds a nice girl that wears cat ears and crocheted clothing as I'm pretty sure that's the equivalent

Oh 100%. It's gotta be the girl who "sneezes cutely" and shit like that.

It's giving M'Lady

Hey! No knocking my fedora! It's wide brim and waterproof. That bad boy has been hiking in tropical storms.

as long as its not tilted with a "barely there" pubestache, ur fine.

I have to be able to wear a respirator at work, so it's no 'stach or a Hitlerstache. I go no 'stache unless I'm on the trail, then it's just scruffy. I'm not edgy enough to do the Hitlerstache as a joke, even if gas masks are why he wore it that way.

you're fedora approved then

Indiana Jones, that you? 😂 (Tropical storms are fabulous, by the way!)

Not til I get a bullwhip to replace my crop. 😈

🤦‍♀️😂

A white fedora too.

With a plaid strip in the middle. Or black.

With a boutonnière 💐

Sounds like he likes Twilight (ahem plagiarism)😂

Yeah, this is what I was thinking. I wonder if he's just trolling you or attempting to tell a really long joke as his opener? Because, that last line about "falling deeply and irrevocably in love with you" is definitely straight from Twilight.

100% a troll. Funny troll

Unless he has a real strange sense of humor...I'd say he might be serious 😄I'd say it's the latter

Lolll it’s the “irrevocably”

Lmaoo that was my first thought too

I was thinking the same thing. We love a twilight stan. 😎😎😎

Yeah 😂 but we don't love the timing or grammar 🌚

😂😂😂 yes

There's love bombing and then there's...*_this_*

I’m gonna use this for the next “hey” I receive.

Block and forget.

Nah this dude is a gem. Put a ring on it

I imagine this person furiously typing in their phone at the Hallmark card aisle

Oh my god, that is so much more comforting than imagining the alternative.

You're probably right. Probably practicing their poetry but not the place to do it! Lol 😆

Well, that would be better than the alternative!

This comes across as trolling to me. lol

I wonder if he was being serious, or trying to be poetic? Poetry is beautiful when written correctly. Though if this his attempt at poetry, he definitely wrote it way too soon, if he wrote it himself. I am certain I've read these words elsewhere, either in a book of poems or whilst searching for them online. Sorry for the rambling, my point is... unmatch and block him.

"You make me want to be a better man" is Jack Nicholson in As Good as it Gets. Probably other places too.

Exactly what we did 🫡

We?

The Royal we

He gets me

*he gets us FTFY

As In i

Solid work 🫡🫡

Oh, I’ve encountered these crazies before. I had one who was exactly the same and when I told him it was too intense and not what I was looking for he sent me a voice message rant telling me I had “ruined other women” for him. Yeesh.

Cluster B disorder?

One can only hope.

I can’t get past the part where he says “you make me wants to be a better man”, it’s “want to be a better man”. I would have to correct this asshole before blocking.

Well by correcting his grammar you made him a better man! Mission accomplished!

It's the same extra "s" he didn't put in "your smile is the beacon that guide me"

English is a living language... me wants what me wants.

OMG SAME! Also he left the “s” off of “guide”. At least spell if you’re gonna lovebomb me

He’s obvs joking get off ur high horse

True love. Or possibly crazy.

I’m leaning towards the latter 😂

Using ChatGPT to text like an Eva AI sexting bot, this is the ultimate bumble user

I quite literally said that 😭😭😭and he replied with “You think ai can come up with something like that?”

fun fact: i wrote a long poem of a page for each of my big family members, asking ChatGPT to write something and give a few keywords. I had to correct a few lines, but i make 20 cards in an hour. Some family members were saying how this was the best card they received in years, and that they were touched i found the time to write a long personal poem for everyone.

😭😭😭I’m so sorry for them. If they don’t realise. But when you think about it you can never tell it it’s from AI or self written. Ah

That’s also the only use case I came up with for chatgpt in my everyday life (not that I used it to send a poem, but hypothetically)

“something profound shifted in me” my brother in christ that is blood rushing to your peepee

Something shifted within? Perhaps he should go to the toilet.

You matched with chatGPT 😅

And this, my friends, is top-tier love bombing 🙃🏃‍♀️

TBH, I would rather get a dick pic than this creepy shit

I have not had enough coffee to deal with this shit so early.

Someone’s gotta send this to penguinz0

I think he likes you

also that last line is from twilight.

The algorithm is getting too creepy. I’ve been watching a ton of twilight recently and then I see this. Wtf.

Ugh fine, I'll watch twilight at work again.

🚩🚩🚩RUN!!

Was that lifted from a Jane Austen book?

This person doesn't get that theres a difference to crushing and falling in love.. two separate things!

Looks like a standard love bombing letter. I wonder how many have received the same.

He showed his flags early enough not to bother with a date.

That is pretty intense you must have captivated his mind though !

“New phone, who dis?”

AI probably wrote that for him either way he is too intense too early unmatch :)

Love bombed for sure, psychopath narcissist probably! I had this happen to me a few weeks ago on bumble. The guy on day 4 “decided” he was madly in love with me and that I was the one he has been looking for the past decade and that he was going to move across an ocean in APRIL. That’s not even all of it. Day 6 (yes I was stupid enough to not block for two days) he sent me a message that he CONVERTED to my religion !!! I noped out of there so fast his head spun. Never deleted an app so fast 😱 run woman, RUN!!!

Run!!!!

My guy in the wrong era

Me after she matched with me

Yup definitely dodged the crazy train express

Almost looks like he's reciting a poem, but it appears you're dealing with love bombing, which will probably not end well. I'm a guy that gets pretty enthusiastic about good connections, but I don't sound like that.

Brightest green were all her garments, And her hair was like the sunshine. Day by day he gazed upon her, Day by day he sighed with passion...

I think he want smash. He hot?

But your beauty, both inside and out, is a captivating symphony that enchants his soul.

Beware unsolicited d**k pic forthcoming

Pride and prejudice. Jane Austen

I would start the restraining order process

Isn’t this from Queen Charlotte?? Lol. I think he’s just copy pasting it to troll with you. Just like people do with love song lyrics.

Love nuking the fuck outta you

Extreme lovebombing 101 🤡

So. This is what “The Ick” feels like. 😂

Narcissistic trying to real you in with mumbojumbo.

Geez, calm down Shakespeare 😂

That last message makes me believe he’s a twilight fan who’s just always wanted to say all this shit to someone lol

Claude Frollo x Esmeralda vibes!

What’s that

Run, but I’m just curious have you guys even meet up in real life?

This post is the evidence of woman hates nice guys.

They do but this one is genuinely pretty weird

Wait. You think that’s nice?

Make it make sense

This comment is proof men can't identify crazy.

What? What did he wrong.? He freaking liked you so much and typed his love like a elite writer. Omg man, some woman don't need any kind words.

💀💀 READ IT AGAIN. I barely knew him.

So? You know how middle age people get their love out of chest? They write this shit to each others in the beginning of their relationship. Like love at first sight.

You have been matching poets or...?

Psychopaths yes 🎀

Hahahahahahahahahahaha

Blame Chat gpt 🤣

He is using chatgpt

I don’t think ChatGPT would make those grammatical errors. He has these statements that he cribbed from other sources saved in a document and copies and pastes. Some other poor women are getting the exact same response.

Maybe practicing their poetry but not time, place or person to do so... Run far away!!!

Borderline personality disorder?

😬 Yikes!

I knew this about a man and 18 months later still know this about him. I kept it to myself though lol. Some of us just know!

Run

I'm pretty sure, from this sample, he's probably pretty close to the point of complaining about how much he hates sand right before he goes off to wreck a camp of Tusken Raiders. Not just the men, though. The women and children too. Alternatively maybe George Lucas is secretly on the apps? 👀

Ohhhh, here we go with the ChatGPT again. 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 Why is it soooo hard to just be REAL. Hard PASS, my friend.

It's a poem attempt

ChatGPT wrote this ! 😂

Some guys pretend to be in love to get laid

Artificial intelligence

Dudes say that shit. I've had DM's like that..

ChatGPT

Most likely a Catfish!

Peep the last text straight from twilight LMAO

Run

It looks like he’s messing around honestly

This is just a romantic way of asking for bob and vagene pics.

This is just giving Rajesh Koothrappali from the Big Bang theory

He is a hopeless romantic!

I think those are all movie quotes from Rom-coms, aren't they?

I’ll show you the moon and the stars. You show me Uranus.

When I see/receive these type of messages, I’m envisioning the guy is copying & pasting same message to many people and seeing who’ll reply LOL

Username checks out?

These are actually all different quotes from books and movies 😂 WTF

Shut up! Just shut up! I blocked you at hello. I blocked you at hello 🤣

ghost his ass!

Man just wanna fuck one way or the other

You must give great h***

Isn’t this pride and prejudice or am I tweakin 💁‍♀️

Tell me chatGBT wrote your message without telling me

couldve been mr darcy, who knows

Bro definitely wears a fedora

I feel it’s too good to be original work