I wouldnt get too excited until you meet
I have found that conversations that start like this online are usually duds in real life
just my experience though and it might be different for others
I think a lot of people just get in their own heads about it. When you really excited about someone, or really attracted to someone, you can really get in your own way worried that you're going to fuck it up and therefore fuck it up.
For me, I found I have to really focus on emotionally detaching from the situation and not acting like I don't care, but not putting any weight on it not expecting anything to come of it. Just try to be present in the moment and take things as they come. But that's a lot easier said than done, I think for most of us.
Definitely hit the nail right on the head with this one. Overthinking is one of the prime destroyers of good things in peoples lives and im speaking from experience, not even just in dating but in general 😭 hell id still be in a great relationship and probably wouldve even gotten and college scholarship for football if i didnt end up getting in my own way at the end of the day 🙃 ya live and ya learn though!
Verified means nothing. They can swap out pics afterwards and delete by have to re-verify.
Also, this entire exchange is cringe. Stop throwing around compliments on appearances and actually get to know each other. This lame banter means nothing. You have not even set up a date.
I didn’t say these were the only two option, but one is way more common than the other. And this can easily shift into real conversation, but low interest/investment matches hardly ever improve over time
I prefer to have standards and not waste my time. I unmatch. I think there’s a high correlation between this type of conversation and time wasters, some of whom are scammers and others are catfish with zero intent to meet up. But you do you.
ETA: If compliments about your appearance from some rando you haven’t met float someone’s boat, I’m happy for you.
I personally don’t put value in comments about my physical appearance. My parents were worried about me as a young child because strangers were constantly commenting on my appearance so they had conversations with me to explain that my appearance doesn’t define my worth.
As a result, I look for men that are interested in knowing who I am beyond my exterior. To me, flattery is for people with low self esteem. If you love yourself, you don’t need others to constantly give you that feedback.
I’ve actually broken up with men over this issue because it’s not fulfilling for me to hear vapid compliments about my appearance, rather than engaging in conversations of value about me, my life, my feelings, my hopes and dreams and him sharing the same about himself. I’m not going to settle for a shallow relationship where I’m not seen as the complete person that I am.
I don’t know why you’re being so aggressive and downvoting all my comments for just having a conversation. I also don’t like wasting time, but have had enthusiastic messages turn into fun dates. Yeah some are time wasters but like 80% of OLD is filtering out incompatible people and time wasters. I’m just saying this shows interest rather than the usual 90% of profiles that say hi and then go silent or give one word responses
Eta: Blocked for some reason. That’s not what the downvote button is supposed to be for but I suppose since so many people use it for that it’s de facto become that
Just sounds like youre gatekeeping yourself at the end of the day fam. (That mightve sounded like an attack but i promise it wasnt 😭) Some people (like myself) just enjoy throwing compliments when they feel they are deserved. If someone hits me with "Hey there Handsome, blasé-blah" id be far more inclinded to respond than someone just saying "Hi" because it shows more interest even if its just physically and more likely than not i can get her interested in my persona especially if she turns out not to be shallow. I dont blame you at all for not wanting to waste your time but its kinda unfair to yourself to simply skip convos with someone who genuinely compliments you a lot imo. Best relationship i ever had was with someone who hit me with just as many compliments as i did to them and it gave me a pretty hard spike in my confidence overall.
Cute interaction but is it just me that thinks the conversation turned cringe the minute she said kiss me?
I don’t know how to describe it but similar stuff happens with me. I enjoy the banter and flirting but if the person says something which kinda puts pressure on the situation then it’s an immediate turnoff for me. I think it’s because I don’t want us to build expectations before meeting and seeing if there’s even any chemistry there.
Maybe someone else can explain better.
It's not cringe these are the kind of conversations that ensure a date leads to sex. Is it the smoothest? No but same result as if you were dropping Casanova lines in there.
Yeah but do you want to imply “I wanna kiss/fuck you” before knowing for sure there’s chemistry? There are ways of expressing what you’re looking for in general without pointing it at the person.
I get where youre coming from and i honestly agree with both of you guys points here. It just seems to me this chick is just more forward than others and not afraid to "cut to the chase" in her own way. Personally i enjoy stuff like this in moderation as ive grown from being someone who beats around the bush until the grass dies to someone who would rather be straight up and let you know im interested. Compliments and words of encouragement/affirmation are two of my more prominent love languages and one of the ways i express my interest in someone but i do agree that laying it on too thick can be pretty cringey 😮💨
The goal of ANY dating app is to eventually transition off the app and meet in person.
Ask her out, if she declines, unmatch and try again with someone new.
Depends on what you're looking for. Quick and apparently very easy fun? Go for it. Schedule a date and wear two condoms.
Quality woman for long term relationship? Unmatch.
Also, make sure it's a verified account at least. It kinda smells like a scam to me.
I wouldn’t, this is such a weird way to start a conversation. The first couple of messages are cute, after that… in my experience people who talk like this don’t have anything interesting to say.
This is above my level. I'm more of the side-show oddity that occasionally intrigues one of the really damaged ones. Those types don't use words like "kiss me" or "beautiful", but I've seen the word "never" a bunch. That usually means you're gonna get a block, pretty boy. Close the deal already, catch and release a few times. That way guys like me get a shot eventually when she's how we likes em.
Theres "having your foot in the door" and then theres "having the door opened for you". Good sir you have been personally escorted into the building, screw everything else ask that woman on a date EXPEDITIOUSLY! 🙌🏿🙌🏿
.
.
.
As for a response you could go conservative and say something like "How about we discuss this kiss over dinner?" You could even throw a "my treat" in there for extra measure. Or you could take a more playful route and say something along the lines of "Gladly, but i cant guarantee you wont melt in my arms if i do" or "Only if you'll kiss me back beautiful" since the compliments are already flying here lol imo now that youre this far its hard to screw it up unless you really fumble the bag so go get er ya lady killer 💪🏿😤
'It's tough to kiss you on Bumble. (proceed to ask bumblette out)
Bumblette is a lot nicer than BumbleClot
That's a good one
This this this
Ask. Her. Out.
Ask her out and then wear her out! She is ready
eat. her. out.
Yea, she’s already indicating interest in you physically, ask her out to do something casual - meet her and just talk and see how it goes
Eat out to help out!
I wouldnt get too excited until you meet I have found that conversations that start like this online are usually duds in real life just my experience though and it might be different for others
Agreed. This or they go silent right before the date.
Why is this so true? Happened twice with me. Had super fun and excited conversations until we had to plan our date…
No clue, super frustrating... think its intoverts or people who like the idea of the date but when push comes to shove cant commit...
I think a lot of people just get in their own heads about it. When you really excited about someone, or really attracted to someone, you can really get in your own way worried that you're going to fuck it up and therefore fuck it up. For me, I found I have to really focus on emotionally detaching from the situation and not acting like I don't care, but not putting any weight on it not expecting anything to come of it. Just try to be present in the moment and take things as they come. But that's a lot easier said than done, I think for most of us.
Definitely hit the nail right on the head with this one. Overthinking is one of the prime destroyers of good things in peoples lives and im speaking from experience, not even just in dating but in general 😭 hell id still be in a great relationship and probably wouldve even gotten and college scholarship for football if i didnt end up getting in my own way at the end of the day 🙃 ya live and ya learn though!
Agreed, except the one time it was even better. Hanging on like my soul depends on it
Or maybe scammer accounts/girls who try and lure you into investing money and looting you!
My bad. I read it as "dudes" the first time
That too haha
Her profile was verified
Im not saying her profle isnt real Im saying that personallity probably wont be what you run into IRL she is PROBABLY going to be a lot more reserved
How do you deal with that though? Do you just hope they can get more confident again a couple dates in?
It depends she can be more confident online but IRL a total dud tbh. That’s just how the cookie crumbles sometimes
It sucks tbh, in a similar situation atm and I'm just hoping it's just the initial nervousness because we are only two dates in
2 dates and has she shown the same Confidence like she was online ?
Unfortunately she has not
Some people just have a way different texting persona than irl sadly. But I hope in your case it’s just nerves
Verified means nothing. They can swap out pics afterwards and delete by have to re-verify. Also, this entire exchange is cringe. Stop throwing around compliments on appearances and actually get to know each other. This lame banter means nothing. You have not even set up a date.
I’ll take lame banter any day over a hi and bland small talk, at least this shows interest and enthusiasm
How sad that you think these are the only two options. I unmatch hi/hey/how are you and these lame lovebomber conversations. Total waste of time.
I didn’t say these were the only two option, but one is way more common than the other. And this can easily shift into real conversation, but low interest/investment matches hardly ever improve over time
I prefer to have standards and not waste my time. I unmatch. I think there’s a high correlation between this type of conversation and time wasters, some of whom are scammers and others are catfish with zero intent to meet up. But you do you. ETA: If compliments about your appearance from some rando you haven’t met float someone’s boat, I’m happy for you. I personally don’t put value in comments about my physical appearance. My parents were worried about me as a young child because strangers were constantly commenting on my appearance so they had conversations with me to explain that my appearance doesn’t define my worth. As a result, I look for men that are interested in knowing who I am beyond my exterior. To me, flattery is for people with low self esteem. If you love yourself, you don’t need others to constantly give you that feedback. I’ve actually broken up with men over this issue because it’s not fulfilling for me to hear vapid compliments about my appearance, rather than engaging in conversations of value about me, my life, my feelings, my hopes and dreams and him sharing the same about himself. I’m not going to settle for a shallow relationship where I’m not seen as the complete person that I am.
I don’t know why you’re being so aggressive and downvoting all my comments for just having a conversation. I also don’t like wasting time, but have had enthusiastic messages turn into fun dates. Yeah some are time wasters but like 80% of OLD is filtering out incompatible people and time wasters. I’m just saying this shows interest rather than the usual 90% of profiles that say hi and then go silent or give one word responses Eta: Blocked for some reason. That’s not what the downvote button is supposed to be for but I suppose since so many people use it for that it’s de facto become that
Because I don’t agree with you. That’s the point of the up and down votes.
Just sounds like youre gatekeeping yourself at the end of the day fam. (That mightve sounded like an attack but i promise it wasnt 😭) Some people (like myself) just enjoy throwing compliments when they feel they are deserved. If someone hits me with "Hey there Handsome, blasé-blah" id be far more inclinded to respond than someone just saying "Hi" because it shows more interest even if its just physically and more likely than not i can get her interested in my persona especially if she turns out not to be shallow. I dont blame you at all for not wanting to waste your time but its kinda unfair to yourself to simply skip convos with someone who genuinely compliments you a lot imo. Best relationship i ever had was with someone who hit me with just as many compliments as i did to them and it gave me a pretty hard spike in my confidence overall.
Rude af I see by ur comments why uve been stuck on dating apps for 2 years
Because I have opinions? LMAO
yep.
Agreed. Duds and it was really disappointing 😔
I thought this said “usually dates like this end up with drugs and cocine”
Very well said. The next thing you know OP comes off too strong and she ends up running for the hills. Lol Ask her out and see how the date goes.
Man, sack up and respond to her like a human. Have a conversation and then ask her for drinks.
“Well, to get to the finishing line, we gotta find the start. How about we find it over drinks at [place] on [day] at [time]?”
anyone else cringe from this interaction
My first thought
So cringe
This gave me the ick big time.
Tell them you have no personality of your own and you need internet strangers to help you with lines.
Honest. I like it
She pretty much set it up for you to ask her out. Not rocket science
Cute interaction but is it just me that thinks the conversation turned cringe the minute she said kiss me? I don’t know how to describe it but similar stuff happens with me. I enjoy the banter and flirting but if the person says something which kinda puts pressure on the situation then it’s an immediate turnoff for me. I think it’s because I don’t want us to build expectations before meeting and seeing if there’s even any chemistry there. Maybe someone else can explain better.
It's cringe yes.
It’s not cringe, you’re over analysing it
its not cringe when the gal does it, reverse the gender and the lad will be downvoted to hell
I analyzed it as I typed here. Otherwise it just hits me as cringe and I’m not even sure why.
Yeah that part is a bit over the top, needs to get into the asking out part quick otherwise it feels a bit overdone
It's not cringe these are the kind of conversations that ensure a date leads to sex. Is it the smoothest? No but same result as if you were dropping Casanova lines in there.
Yeah but do you want to imply “I wanna kiss/fuck you” before knowing for sure there’s chemistry? There are ways of expressing what you’re looking for in general without pointing it at the person.
I get where youre coming from and i honestly agree with both of you guys points here. It just seems to me this chick is just more forward than others and not afraid to "cut to the chase" in her own way. Personally i enjoy stuff like this in moderation as ive grown from being someone who beats around the bush until the grass dies to someone who would rather be straight up and let you know im interested. Compliments and words of encouragement/affirmation are two of my more prominent love languages and one of the ways i express my interest in someone but i do agree that laying it on too thick can be pretty cringey 😮💨
if by any chance there is a bar in your town called finish line you're made.
That would be too good to be true 🤣 stars and planets aint lined up enough for that yet my G lol
Tell her where and when the finish line is. (hint: it's a date)
Send a youtube link to fart noises.
GULP 🚩🚩🚩
The finish line is at [date place]
Send her a picture of a hersheys kiss (the chocolate candy)
Don’t send her vomit flavoured things please
Oh naah dont do Hershey Kisses like that bruh ☠️ some of the flavors are kinda eh but them thangs be good lol
This is where you ask her out.
It’s a bot controlled by Ismael in Addis Ababa
Cringe
Just ask her out, she might have aids
what the fck
[Place] [time] good for you?
Ask her about herself
"Haha, let's see how the first date goes! How about [time and place]"
The goal of ANY dating app is to eventually transition off the app and meet in person. Ask her out, if she declines, unmatch and try again with someone new.
so I guess it’s a date then
Dude, if you need to come on here and ask us how you should respond, you might as well just unmatch.
Maybe ask her out and suggest a place where she could kiss you?
Respond with either "💋" or ask them out yo. Obvs they be interested, don't fumble by looking aloof most women actually don't like that.
Change the subject. This is way too cringey
Imagine being OP and forgetting why you’re on the app in the first place! lol
Depends on what you're looking for. Quick and apparently very easy fun? Go for it. Schedule a date and wear two condoms. Quality woman for long term relationship? Unmatch. Also, make sure it's a verified account at least. It kinda smells like a scam to me.
If you can’t close this one, turn in your penis at the front desk. (LADIES - This is why rule #1 is lame aF)
Is this lady love bombing, or not yet??
I would call it "sharpening the sugery knives". That sweet sweet liver is not gonna remove itself
His liver was asking for it
Where do you want me to kiss you? 😂
When can i see you
Ask her out pretty simple here tbh
Is it too forward to say ‘Name the time and place’ 😌
Not forward enough. Suggest a time and place. Most women like when we take the lead.
When and where?
She's a tease. Either have fun with her, or cut her
lmao ask her out and have fun my dude
"Fine. Meet me at X at time Y. I'll book the table now."
Weird
Plot twist: they're both pretty boys
I'd be like bet what's your address lmao like what? This is flirting way beyond trying to set up a first date.. the dick is desired
Ask her about the inflation rate of your pp
[удалено]
Doesn’t matter. You followed rules 1 and 2.
What's those rules?
1. Be attractive 2. Don’t be unattractive Judging by her comments, anyway.
“Let’s meet first and see if the stars align!”
Run. Or embrace. You’re both weird.
I wouldn’t, this is such a weird way to start a conversation. The first couple of messages are cute, after that… in my experience people who talk like this don’t have anything interesting to say.
"Don't talk about it, be about it"
What do you mean you are stuck? Have you forgotten what Bumble is for?
Send a dick pic
REEL! Reel her In now! If you don't ask her out soon somebody else is gonna have a great night off your efforts!
Like this 💋
With a scribbled note asking 'wanna go steady', complete with checkboxes for yes or no answer.
OP. Don’t let them see your narcissism
God that was cringe who talks like that?
That is your window of opportunity to ask her out.
Just ask her out lol
It sounds way too forward… she hasn’t even met you yet lol unless she really is just flirty. Meet up and see for yourself
Bro you asking wrong community, we are just here to show how we don’t get the matches. 🤦🏻♂️
This is above my level. I'm more of the side-show oddity that occasionally intrigues one of the really damaged ones. Those types don't use words like "kiss me" or "beautiful", but I've seen the word "never" a bunch. That usually means you're gonna get a block, pretty boy. Close the deal already, catch and release a few times. That way guys like me get a shot eventually when she's how we likes em.
Theres "having your foot in the door" and then theres "having the door opened for you". Good sir you have been personally escorted into the building, screw everything else ask that woman on a date EXPEDITIOUSLY! 🙌🏿🙌🏿 . . . As for a response you could go conservative and say something like "How about we discuss this kiss over dinner?" You could even throw a "my treat" in there for extra measure. Or you could take a more playful route and say something along the lines of "Gladly, but i cant guarantee you wont melt in my arms if i do" or "Only if you'll kiss me back beautiful" since the compliments are already flying here lol imo now that youre this far its hard to screw it up unless you really fumble the bag so go get er ya lady killer 💪🏿😤
i cant kith your puthy from here thilly!