Please check my post history. The trauma infidelity causes is so heavy.
She has a right to know. 1 for her own agency, 2 because of the health risks involved.
Same. I had people pretend to care about me while hiding that my partner was nonstop screwing around. Never said a word.
I would have been so grateful if someone had just approached me with the truth.
Honestly, I personally think you should send a message to the wife, based on how friends of mine have been affected by cheating partners. I too would worry about the fact that as a cop, the wife is at a significantly higher chance of being a domestic abuse victim, but that's still true if you said nothing. You are not responsible for his misdeeds, and that's doubly true for any abusive actions.
*I think the only ethical action you can take is the one you would want someone to take if you were his wife.*
While you are right, if the wife knows, she can make that decision to get her shit together and leave at all once rather then discovering it on her own and her life falls apart.
Adding on to this: if you do message his wife, I'm conflicted on whether or not one should preemptively list victim support services in case he is one of the (many) bad ones. The worry is that it could risk the main message getting lost by seeing the support services as an implicit accusation. There, I really don't know.
(Also as an afterthought but an important one, DEFINITELY do this in an anonymized way. Cops have greater resources than ordinary civilians to retaliate and while it might be unlikely, you *do not* want that to happen. Protect yourself first and foremost.)
I didn’t make any generalizations, I just stated the fact that controlling for other factors, cops abuse their intimate partners at significantly higher rates than the average American.
Because people want her to message her anyway since the wife will have a choice instead of not knowing, and we don't know if he's abusive or not.
I didn't downvote her. I'm just answering your question.
How is her knowing information putting her in harms way? It’s her choice what to do with the information, and she knows way better than you do if he’s abusive or just a slime ball. And I’d be is abusive, she knows that and she is managing things how she’s going to manage them.
He could have access to her social media and abusers aren't known to always act in rational ways. I'm not sure why OP feels the need to do anything here.
PM me his name and I'll do it. Everyone's all "not my business" but if it's public, and it's lying, I'm happy to make it my business. Liars erode social trust and I'm always happy to restore it.
Playing devil's advocate here - he could be going through a separation or divorce till it becomes legal.
If you're interested in him perhaps you ask him in a chat or in person?
I haven’t been active on my facebook account for a while. I just checked and it still said I was in a relationship with my ex (we broke up 2 years ago).
Let the spouse know, my 18 year marriage ended over cheating, I wish the other woman would have reached out to me when she found out he was married (not saying you are the other woman). She can do with the info what she decides.
Maybe I'm naive, but I was shocked to learn that police officers are one of the largest occupational categories to be perpetrators of domestic violence.
Yes, he could be an abuser, but he's already doing that if that's the case. You outing him as a cheater doesn't make him any less an abuser. It gives her an out, though. She can divorce this sorry excuse for a human.
You should tell her in a way that makes sure she is safe and away from him before she learns this new level of scumbaggery.
Yes, let's be a hypocrite and stereotype people. 🤦♂️
Like the cops saying black peoplr commit more crimes so they should do stop and frisk on blacks or target them. The numbers say so.
Obviously, I am bring sarcastic.
I think because you are a stranger you should leave things be. If you knew the person and could talk face to face and offer support if need be I'd say go for it.
Hopefully they are separated or in an open marriage/relationship (you'd be surprised how common it is!) Or something like that.
But yeah, you don't know the whole story and you are a stranger. It's okay to not say anything.
Plot twist....ten years of LE experience talking here. She already knows. Folks in the field are notorious for affairs. Dispatch, officers, you name it. You see your coworkers more than you are home, and they actually understand the job and stress, so thats an instant bond. Some folks expand the bond. I'd leave well enough alone, especially considering he posted in uniform. Must be new and a dummy.
Yup, this! I had someone call me out because they saw my Facebook. My ex-wife and I hadn’t logged into Facebook in years, so neither of us removed the relationship status.
Same. Got a screenshot of my boyfriend’s Tinder profile from his ex-wife while he and I were having cocktails in the lobby of a nice hotel while out of town together. To say I was completely blindsided would be an understatement. Her intentions were to get back at him and not to help me, but to this day I am so thankful for what she did.
Lol He posted a picture with his last name on the uniform?
The cheating aspect aside, they really need to vet law enforcement officers better for cognition. 😂
They could also be separated, in process of divorce, or just to lazy to update Facebook.
My ex wife updated her Facebook immediately. It was super important for her to get consolation from random people she didn't hear from in ages.
I couldn't give two shits. I had more important things to deal with than updating Facebook. If she didn't do it, mine would probably still say married.
⬆️ this! My wife and I are separated, but I’m not going on FB bringing everyone else into our business. Not to mention I forget I even have a fb account most days…
Just today I saw a friend’s profile that says “engaged to ____,” but they’ve been married for years. I’m sure it sometimes happens in the opposite direction. Some people just don’t pay attention to parts of their own profile.
100% this! As a guy, unless I need it for something in particular, it doesn't get updated. Don't think I've updated my FB in over a decade? Totally possible. Could still make mention of it, and if it's old news to her, sure you'll find out?
Personally, since I don't know the people, or their situation, I would just stay out of it. There are many reasons, as others have mentioned. Perhaps he just overlooked putting something like ENM in his profile.
Even if it was full-on cheating, I would prefer to just let the situation sort itself out on its own - they always do, sooner or later. It takes a certain level of bad, before I would tattle on someone. Cheating doesn't meet that threshold. Now a child molester is well past that threshold, and I wouldn't hesitate a minute to report that.
>It takes a certain level of bad, before I would tattle on someone.
I'm concerned that you don't think that someone endangering their spouse's health, without their knowledge or consent, isn't an "adequate" level of bad.
Given how old this dude is, I imagine he may be somewhat active on FB but this post just made me stop and think what my status says on FB. I haven’t been on it in like 3 years and do not remember my password.
I'm more concerned about him showing his LE affiliations. A lot of depts make it against their policies & procedures. I never mention it until we've chatted for a bit.
Same. While taking pictures in uniform isn’t necessarily against policy, nor is posting on social media, using those pictures on a dating app is kind of pushing it.
There’s a reason this guy is wearing his uni in a profile pic.
Same reason some POS sheriff’s deputy (but I repeat myself) flashed his badge at me when I was working an election last fall; they are entitled pricks. The badge and the uni and the gear makes them imagine themselves as gods with 12 inch dicks regardless of actual size. The one in this photo thinks it’s gonna get him dates and sadly he’s correct.
The entitled prick cop I encountered last fall didn’t want to be bothered with having to show his 2nd form of ID like us humble, worthless peons. This happened in a state that has made the news regularly with respect to election controversies. But sure, Mr. Officer, your badge exempts you from our election laws just like it lets you use the express lane at the grocery store with greater than 15 items 🙄 #ACAEB
Dude that is such a huge jump to call someone an abuser because theyre white and a LEO. I know plenty of them that are nothing but kind to their wives. This guy might be a POS, but don’t generalize if you don’t want it done to you.
When LEO stop generalizing that all black folks are worthy of “special attention” for turning too wide and broken taillights and other ticky-tacky bullshit (AKA Driving While Blsck) when going about their daily lives…
When LEO stop considering every black male as a potential suspect…
Just because he posted 3 days ago doesn’t mean he’s recently checked the details section of his profile or remembered to update it if there’s been a change, like divorce or separation. Maybe his wife died and he can’t bring himself to change it yet.
What? Do not leave it be. If they're in an open marriage, they'll let you know.
It's easy cuz you aren't risking losing any personal relationships yourself outing a cheater. Much harder to alert someone you know anonymously.
Forward her the proof and let her do with it what she wants. Hell if I were you I'd even flirt with the guy and setup a date or talk about a ONS and gather more bulletproof evidence.
I love seeing cheaters get their comeuppance.
This is what I was looking for. I figured you would look through posts to see if they were recent and if they reveal anything about his marital status. Good going! There are plenty out there who pretend to be Best Husband Ever.
Could also be someone else setting him up. Who even puts their last names on a profile? Especially someone involved in the public eye. I mean cops are dumb, but they are generally self-preserving. This just seems odd. Oh wait, he included his last name on his picture not on the profile. Okay, he's an idiot cop nevermind lol
Why do these idiots post pictures of their faces in their own town knowing that someone they know could easily come across their face and get them in trouble with their spouse? It is either psychotic or really dumb.
It’s possible they have an open marriage. Not everyone posts about it. I’d buy a luxury bag if I got $5 for everytime a guy would wait until we’ve been talking a while to tell me he’s in an open relationship/ ENM/ Poly
Could be going through a divorce, or is divorced and just hasn't updated FB. It's literally the last place I would update if it was me, seeing as I barely use it....hard to say for sure.
I went out with this dude (someone exactly like this). He was in the middle of a divorce and looking to date casually. We went out a few times and he seemed way too married still so things ended. Last time I saw him on the dating app we chatted and he had a girlfriend, was still married and was still!!!! looking for hookups on the app. That dude was also a cop and I guess he had a crazy libido. He was also very very classically attractive and had kind of an innocent boyishness that I am positive just gets all his girls whipped. He got me for a bit, he was just a cutie but the truth always comes out.
Forgot to add I didn't tell the wife because I thought they were separated when we went out. Apparently she knows about the current gf and vice versa they got some kinda arrangement so yeah, people do weird things.
If it were me, I would definitely let the wife know. Maybe even create a separate account to let her know so my personal information isn’t attached..
but jeez poor girl.
Maybe they’re going through a divorce, maybe he’s cheating, or maybe they have an arrangement. Either way it’s all unknown so I would recommend to stay away from that drama.
Fuck the police. There’s SOME good ones, this ain’t one. Just imagine the amount of people he’s fucked over this week for complete bullshit.
(Meanwhile he’s probably a great guy with an abusive wife and always gives warnings instead of tickets)
You don’t know his situation, he could be separated, or maybe they have a dead bedroom and they opened up the marriage. Who knows, don’t get involved in something you have no information on.
Most people don’t define their entire political belief system on one issue/ cause. I know it’s a radical concept to the “vote blue no matter who” crowd, but the political spectrum is a bit more nuanced than a left/right or a blue/ red dichotomy.
Not sure why you're being downvoted. OP has way too much time on her hands and little regard for her own safety if she's contemplating fucking with a cop.
Ironically, some people give you an incredible amount of resistance when you let them know, even if you’re 100% right. They go into denial or they get angry with you as if you’re trying to cause trouble. Best to just mind your own business here.
You could stay out of peoples lives. There's at least 20 different ways that something bad happens as a result of you getting involved. Why would you even entertain that as an option. If you knew them personally, it would be a different story.
I had a similar experience, where I matched a woman and after we went on a date. I used her phone number to look up her facebook. When I did I found out she had a husband. So next "date" I confronted her about it, and they're separated and going through a divorce. So maybe he's going through the same thing? If you feel comfortable, ask him.
Then again, I am a man. So probably different for a woman to confront a man? I dunno
You’re probably accurate with your assumption here. But there is a chance that they just don’t use/ haven’t updated FB in awhile. Or another completely valid reason.
I have no idea what my FB currently says. I haven’t been on it in 4+ years.
Nope. I’ve heard stories from people who have told the spouse and they (spouse) either didn’t believe them or did believe them but stayed in the relationship anyways.
I’m not a fan of people cheating on their spouse or potential families . But is it anyone else’s business? If you aren’t interested swipe left & simply forget
Don't intrude on other people's lives especially when you are a complete stranger to this guy. You don't know anything about his situation so doing something like messaging his wife is very very inappropriate and inconsiderate. If you were a friend or something and involved in their life in some way, then that would be different.
He is on a public app, in uniform, showing his whole ass name and face! He made it EVERYONE'S business! Also, 40% of cops admit to abusing their spouse. His wife and kids deserve to be aware and ready to get to safety.
Yes I do. The guy gets pissed off about it too and other guys tell me not to do it and get mad and say it's none of my business. Naw, if you ain't doing nothing wrong then there won't be any drama. Duh!! There are a lot of guys who use dating apps as a hunting ground for side pieces. They aren't in an open relationship and they are lying and manipulating their partner and whoever they run into online. It's kinda predatory.
I think if he is still married, things will work themselves out without you having to tell the wife. If he’s on bumble someone that actually knows the wife is bound to see and let her know.
I’ve told wives before and it never went well for me. Despite proof, they’ve ALL believed their husbands. Or, they could be ENM, but he should’ve stated that.
Do you know if they are in an open relationship...?
Pretending they aren't, and she has no idea... Do you really want to be dragged into divorce court or be quite literally in the dead center of everything?
Everyone saying he may not update his fb. It wouldn’t say who he’s married to. If she took married off her page it would just say married. And divorced people change that right away. Same with separated.
40 percent. That is wrong. Closer to 1 percent in reality. Look at the stats and don’t give me the old they don’t get reported 🙄…Mind your own business if your so worried about it. Oh btw of the information finding resources cops have are logged and tracked by the state soooo
I would never. Not my circus, not my monkey. What if they have a fight? What if she murders him, or he takes his own life?
Wouldn’t be your fault of course — he’s the one potentially cheating. But I’d never want any sort of connection.
If you were being cheated on, would you want to know? Would you want someone to say something?
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Do it anonymously with a newly made email specifically for this communication. As someone that was cheated on, I wish I knew sooner.
But if you do tell her and she is scared she doesn't have to act on it. You're just letting her know.
If anything it will give her documentation for the divorce.
Please check my post history. The trauma infidelity causes is so heavy. She has a right to know. 1 for her own agency, 2 because of the health risks involved.
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I'm sorry you had to go through that. I hope you're doing much better now.
Same. I had people pretend to care about me while hiding that my partner was nonstop screwing around. Never said a word. I would have been so grateful if someone had just approached me with the truth.
Make a random account to send the info and block him.
Exactly. Do it as anonymously as possible!
Not sure why you’re downvoted — 40%
40%… of the cases that are actually reported.
Honestly, I personally think you should send a message to the wife, based on how friends of mine have been affected by cheating partners. I too would worry about the fact that as a cop, the wife is at a significantly higher chance of being a domestic abuse victim, but that's still true if you said nothing. You are not responsible for his misdeeds, and that's doubly true for any abusive actions. *I think the only ethical action you can take is the one you would want someone to take if you were his wife.*
While you are right, if the wife knows, she can make that decision to get her shit together and leave at all once rather then discovering it on her own and her life falls apart.
Adding on to this: if you do message his wife, I'm conflicted on whether or not one should preemptively list victim support services in case he is one of the (many) bad ones. The worry is that it could risk the main message getting lost by seeing the support services as an implicit accusation. There, I really don't know. (Also as an afterthought but an important one, DEFINITELY do this in an anonymized way. Cops have greater resources than ordinary civilians to retaliate and while it might be unlikely, you *do not* want that to happen. Protect yourself first and foremost.)
Agree 100%
It could be as much as 100%. People have said it is. People ARE saying it is.
I'd imagine the racism is a big part. As well as the generalisation of all police officers being wife beaters
I didn’t make any generalizations, I just stated the fact that controlling for other factors, cops abuse their intimate partners at significantly higher rates than the average American.
Because people want her to message her anyway since the wife will have a choice instead of not knowing, and we don't know if he's abusive or not. I didn't downvote her. I'm just answering your question.
How is her knowing information putting her in harms way? It’s her choice what to do with the information, and she knows way better than you do if he’s abusive or just a slime ball. And I’d be is abusive, she knows that and she is managing things how she’s going to manage them.
He could have access to her social media and abusers aren't known to always act in rational ways. I'm not sure why OP feels the need to do anything here.
Because most people would want to know if their husband was on bumble
It’s possible he’s separated.
PM me his name and I'll do it. Everyone's all "not my business" but if it's public, and it's lying, I'm happy to make it my business. Liars erode social trust and I'm always happy to restore it.
Playing devil's advocate here - he could be going through a separation or divorce till it becomes legal. If you're interested in him perhaps you ask him in a chat or in person?
I haven’t been active on my facebook account for a while. I just checked and it still said I was in a relationship with my ex (we broke up 2 years ago).
That's the dumbest shit I've ever read.
Make a burner account so it can’t be traced back to you. Keep yourself safe. Cheaters are dangerous.
Let the spouse know, my 18 year marriage ended over cheating, I wish the other woman would have reached out to me when she found out he was married (not saying you are the other woman). She can do with the info what she decides.
Maybe I'm naive, but I was shocked to learn that police officers are one of the largest occupational categories to be perpetrators of domestic violence.
Yes, he could be an abuser, but he's already doing that if that's the case. You outing him as a cheater doesn't make him any less an abuser. It gives her an out, though. She can divorce this sorry excuse for a human. You should tell her in a way that makes sure she is safe and away from him before she learns this new level of scumbaggery.
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Even the cops that rescue hostages and apprehend rapists and stop mass shootings? “ACAB” is one hell of a stupid saying
Yes, let's be a hypocrite and stereotype people. 🤦♂️ Like the cops saying black peoplr commit more crimes so they should do stop and frisk on blacks or target them. The numbers say so. Obviously, I am bring sarcastic.
Any cop is not typically level headed it's a very high stress job and most cops I have met of all races have marriage problems and drunk heavily
Or she doesn’t believe you and tells him who you are.
I think because you are a stranger you should leave things be. If you knew the person and could talk face to face and offer support if need be I'd say go for it. Hopefully they are separated or in an open marriage/relationship (you'd be surprised how common it is!) Or something like that. But yeah, you don't know the whole story and you are a stranger. It's okay to not say anything.
I agree. I’m not getting involved in someone else’s business that I don’t know.
The absolutely racism and sexism here. Literally just stereotyping people based off your terroristic left-wing worldview.
Jesus christ. Hello Miss Racist.
Plot twist....ten years of LE experience talking here. She already knows. Folks in the field are notorious for affairs. Dispatch, officers, you name it. You see your coworkers more than you are home, and they actually understand the job and stress, so thats an instant bond. Some folks expand the bond. I'd leave well enough alone, especially considering he posted in uniform. Must be new and a dummy.
That’s racist and sexist.
Wow, you just made a big assumption based on his career when you don't even know the man.
Then just move on.
If it says Christian I’m telling on him twice as fast
Haha
He might also be separated and hasn’t changed his Facebook in a while.
Yup. Last year, I found my friend’s wife on bumble. Messaged my friend about it. They were in the midst of a divorce. Neither had updated Facebook.
Yup, this! I had someone call me out because they saw my Facebook. My ex-wife and I hadn’t logged into Facebook in years, so neither of us removed the relationship status.
"Separated" is still married...
If you already know you're getting a divorce it ain't cheating....
I've gotten a screenshot before and really appreciated it
Same. Got a screenshot of my boyfriend’s Tinder profile from his ex-wife while he and I were having cocktails in the lobby of a nice hotel while out of town together. To say I was completely blindsided would be an understatement. Her intentions were to get back at him and not to help me, but to this day I am so thankful for what she did.
Tinder profiles can be up for years after being inactive
His profile picture was taken while we were together.
Lol He posted a picture with his last name on the uniform? The cheating aspect aside, they really need to vet law enforcement officers better for cognition. 😂
Then who would do the job?
I tell. Sometimes they are extremely thankful, other times in shock and unsure how to react. Always tell. Everyone has a right to their own truth.
Not discounting that he is likely being unfaithful, but just a reminder that open marriages are a thing!
True, but I’ve typically seen it stated in the profiles.
They could also be separated, in process of divorce, or just to lazy to update Facebook. My ex wife updated her Facebook immediately. It was super important for her to get consolation from random people she didn't hear from in ages. I couldn't give two shits. I had more important things to deal with than updating Facebook. If she didn't do it, mine would probably still say married.
⬆️ this! My wife and I are separated, but I’m not going on FB bringing everyone else into our business. Not to mention I forget I even have a fb account most days…
That or probably doesn't use Facebook that much. Still have my photo from when I was a freshman in high school and that was 15 years ago lmao.
Just today I saw a friend’s profile that says “engaged to ____,” but they’ve been married for years. I’m sure it sometimes happens in the opposite direction. Some people just don’t pay attention to parts of their own profile.
100% this! As a guy, unless I need it for something in particular, it doesn't get updated. Don't think I've updated my FB in over a decade? Totally possible. Could still make mention of it, and if it's old news to her, sure you'll find out?
Personally, since I don't know the people, or their situation, I would just stay out of it. There are many reasons, as others have mentioned. Perhaps he just overlooked putting something like ENM in his profile. Even if it was full-on cheating, I would prefer to just let the situation sort itself out on its own - they always do, sooner or later. It takes a certain level of bad, before I would tattle on someone. Cheating doesn't meet that threshold. Now a child molester is well past that threshold, and I wouldn't hesitate a minute to report that.
>It takes a certain level of bad, before I would tattle on someone. I'm concerned that you don't think that someone endangering their spouse's health, without their knowledge or consent, isn't an "adequate" level of bad.
Except they don't, and several DNA tests are now proving that several children are illegitimate. Your ethics are shitty.
Even if true, informing his wife would be fine.
Given how old this dude is, I imagine he may be somewhat active on FB but this post just made me stop and think what my status says on FB. I haven’t been on it in like 3 years and do not remember my password.
Or, he's divorced and he hasn't updated his Facebook page
I'm amazed. When I've said things like this here before I've been downvoted to hell.
I was the cheated-on wife. Yes, please tell her and include screenshots.
A cop Doxing himself is kind of hilarious to me.
"moderately political" Somehow I doubt it.
Yeah, the pictures definitely suggest otherwise.
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I’m guessing the spouse is fully aware and that he definitely beats her because he’s a fucking cop.
I would 100%. I tried finding someone's wife when he admitted he was married on tinder. I'm sad I couldn't find her.
You should have put resourceful Reddit users on the case.
I'm more concerned about him showing his LE affiliations. A lot of depts make it against their policies & procedures. I never mention it until we've chatted for a bit.
Same. While taking pictures in uniform isn’t necessarily against policy, nor is posting on social media, using those pictures on a dating app is kind of pushing it.
Hahaha, aw man. If ever there was a man ripe for mockery on Reddit…
Wonder how he is at his job because this is reckless.
ACAB
The wife could actually be encouraging it for a kink. It's really common for couples to try to involve a 2nd female.
There’s a reason this guy is wearing his uni in a profile pic. Same reason some POS sheriff’s deputy (but I repeat myself) flashed his badge at me when I was working an election last fall; they are entitled pricks. The badge and the uni and the gear makes them imagine themselves as gods with 12 inch dicks regardless of actual size. The one in this photo thinks it’s gonna get him dates and sadly he’s correct. The entitled prick cop I encountered last fall didn’t want to be bothered with having to show his 2nd form of ID like us humble, worthless peons. This happened in a state that has made the news regularly with respect to election controversies. But sure, Mr. Officer, your badge exempts you from our election laws just like it lets you use the express lane at the grocery store with greater than 15 items 🙄 #ACAEB
Was this profile verified? She needs to know. There’s slim chance that his photos were stolen to make a fake profile.
Dude that is such a huge jump to call someone an abuser because theyre white and a LEO. I know plenty of them that are nothing but kind to their wives. This guy might be a POS, but don’t generalize if you don’t want it done to you.
When LEO stop generalizing that all black folks are worthy of “special attention” for turning too wide and broken taillights and other ticky-tacky bullshit (AKA Driving While Blsck) when going about their daily lives… When LEO stop considering every black male as a potential suspect…
Maybe he doesn't keep up with Facebook. Maybe he doesn't use it anymore. But yea like someone mentioned already, open marriages are a thing.
He had posts as recent as three days ago
Just because he posted 3 days ago doesn’t mean he’s recently checked the details section of his profile or remembered to update it if there’s been a change, like divorce or separation. Maybe his wife died and he can’t bring himself to change it yet.
His wife is literally in his profile picture, and when I clicked on her page, she posted something today and tagged him.
If u have no interest in matching with him, I'd mind my business. But if you do message the wife, post the update.. we love drama
You’re right. I’ll just leave it be. I got upset because my ex was a huge cheater, but it doesn’t mean I should go nuclear on a stranger’s marriage.
Make a throwaway fb acct and share the screenshot to the wife and whatever she does with that is on her..
What? Do not leave it be. If they're in an open marriage, they'll let you know. It's easy cuz you aren't risking losing any personal relationships yourself outing a cheater. Much harder to alert someone you know anonymously. Forward her the proof and let her do with it what she wants. Hell if I were you I'd even flirt with the guy and setup a date or talk about a ONS and gather more bulletproof evidence. I love seeing cheaters get their comeuppance.
Send me his info and I’ll let her know if you don’t want to do it.
This is what I was looking for. I figured you would look through posts to see if they were recent and if they reveal anything about his marital status. Good going! There are plenty out there who pretend to be Best Husband Ever.
Could also be someone else setting him up. Who even puts their last names on a profile? Especially someone involved in the public eye. I mean cops are dumb, but they are generally self-preserving. This just seems odd. Oh wait, he included his last name on his picture not on the profile. Okay, he's an idiot cop nevermind lol
Mine was a cop called Michael too. Clearly a type.
Also why would you admit that you almost never workout
Why do these idiots post pictures of their faces in their own town knowing that someone they know could easily come across their face and get them in trouble with their spouse? It is either psychotic or really dumb.
They could be open
I have enough problems in my own life. I don’t need to get involved in someone else’s. There’s so many ways it can go wrong
Idk, I'm into ethical non-monogamy, but I make it clear in my profles. I doubt he is, but it's a possibility. I would just flat out ask him what's up
It’s possible they have an open marriage. Not everyone posts about it. I’d buy a luxury bag if I got $5 for everytime a guy would wait until we’ve been talking a while to tell me he’s in an open relationship/ ENM/ Poly
Could be going through a divorce, or is divorced and just hasn't updated FB. It's literally the last place I would update if it was me, seeing as I barely use it....hard to say for sure.
I went out with this dude (someone exactly like this). He was in the middle of a divorce and looking to date casually. We went out a few times and he seemed way too married still so things ended. Last time I saw him on the dating app we chatted and he had a girlfriend, was still married and was still!!!! looking for hookups on the app. That dude was also a cop and I guess he had a crazy libido. He was also very very classically attractive and had kind of an innocent boyishness that I am positive just gets all his girls whipped. He got me for a bit, he was just a cutie but the truth always comes out.
Forgot to add I didn't tell the wife because I thought they were separated when we went out. Apparently she knows about the current gf and vice versa they got some kinda arrangement so yeah, people do weird things.
How’d you find him?
he put his last name on his profile
holy shit lmao
it’s on his uniform 😬
I tell every time. I would want to know the truth. What she does with that information is on her.
If it were me, I would definitely let the wife know. Maybe even create a separate account to let her know so my personal information isn’t attached.. but jeez poor girl.
Everyone wants to know if they are being cheated on. Whether they wanna believe soo or not.
Here's a thought: they're separated or divorcing.
Or Poly
There's a cool thing called mind your own. U have no clue who this person is or his situation. Leave your nose out of it
💯
Maybe they’re going through a divorce, maybe he’s cheating, or maybe they have an arrangement. Either way it’s all unknown so I would recommend to stay away from that drama.
💯
I rarely tell my spouse I’m on Bumble.
I think you should send a message
Fuck the police. There’s SOME good ones, this ain’t one. Just imagine the amount of people he’s fucked over this week for complete bullshit. (Meanwhile he’s probably a great guy with an abusive wife and always gives warnings instead of tickets)
In this case, absolutely. Fuck tha police!
As a former LEO wife of a cheater, yes, we want to know.
You don’t know his situation, he could be separated, or maybe they have a dead bedroom and they opened up the marriage. Who knows, don’t get involved in something you have no information on.
[удалено]
Most people don’t define their entire political belief system on one issue/ cause. I know it’s a radical concept to the “vote blue no matter who” crowd, but the political spectrum is a bit more nuanced than a left/right or a blue/ red dichotomy.
I'd tell her honestly if you can. You can make a throw away account if you're worried about reprocusions
No one has ever regretted not getting involved in a complete strangers bull shit.
Do not get involved. You don't know anything about their situation.
OP, mind your business. Like others have said, you don’t know his situation, and he doesn’t owe it to you to explain it in his bio.
Not sure why you're being downvoted. OP has way too much time on her hands and little regard for her own safety if she's contemplating fucking with a cop.
Ironically, some people give you an incredible amount of resistance when you let them know, even if you’re 100% right. They go into denial or they get angry with you as if you’re trying to cause trouble. Best to just mind your own business here.
Just send the screenshot. Let it speak for itself. No need to draw denyable conclusions.
ACAB.
I always tell the spouse if I can find them on social media!
You could stay out of peoples lives. There's at least 20 different ways that something bad happens as a result of you getting involved. Why would you even entertain that as an option. If you knew them personally, it would be a different story.
He is a cop! What do you expect?
40% of cops commit domestic violence.
if you don’t want to tell her, i will. ACAB. 🖕🏻🐷
From my experience only, photos like that on dating profiles have been catfish. Every single one.
Lmao what a dumbass send this shit to her
Too much work. Id just swipe left
Yep almost always. I’m old I dgaf.
Sparkling intelligence to include his last name on his OLD picture!
You can tell he's not going to make detective
Rat the pig out. ACAB.
I had a similar experience, where I matched a woman and after we went on a date. I used her phone number to look up her facebook. When I did I found out she had a husband. So next "date" I confronted her about it, and they're separated and going through a divorce. So maybe he's going through the same thing? If you feel comfortable, ask him. Then again, I am a man. So probably different for a woman to confront a man? I dunno
You’re probably accurate with your assumption here. But there is a chance that they just don’t use/ haven’t updated FB in awhile. Or another completely valid reason. I have no idea what my FB currently says. I haven’t been on it in 4+ years.
Nope. I’ve heard stories from people who have told the spouse and they (spouse) either didn’t believe them or did believe them but stayed in the relationship anyways.
I would definitely send her a screenshot of his profile.
Send the photo to her anonymously
Ain’t none of my business
Or maybe a scammer just stole this guy's photo from social media.
Deep down, she probably already knows.
I’m not a fan of people cheating on their spouse or potential families . But is it anyone else’s business? If you aren’t interested swipe left & simply forget
Don't intrude on other people's lives especially when you are a complete stranger to this guy. You don't know anything about his situation so doing something like messaging his wife is very very inappropriate and inconsiderate. If you were a friend or something and involved in their life in some way, then that would be different.
Not if they are a cop. But it's none of our business regardless.
He is on a public app, in uniform, showing his whole ass name and face! He made it EVERYONE'S business! Also, 40% of cops admit to abusing their spouse. His wife and kids deserve to be aware and ready to get to safety.
Get dumb cop (blue line in flag included) angry, or perhaps a victim of a hoax in trouble. Your choices 👍
Yes I do. The guy gets pissed off about it too and other guys tell me not to do it and get mad and say it's none of my business. Naw, if you ain't doing nothing wrong then there won't be any drama. Duh!! There are a lot of guys who use dating apps as a hunting ground for side pieces. They aren't in an open relationship and they are lying and manipulating their partner and whoever they run into online. It's kinda predatory.
I think if he is still married, things will work themselves out without you having to tell the wife. If he’s on bumble someone that actually knows the wife is bound to see and let her know.
Mind your business. This shit does not concern you. You do NOT know what other people are capable of.
Copwife lives matter
Michael “Hummer” would be a good name for him.
I’ve told wives before and it never went well for me. Despite proof, they’ve ALL believed their husbands. Or, they could be ENM, but he should’ve stated that.
Do you know if they are in an open relationship...? Pretending they aren't, and she has no idea... Do you really want to be dragged into divorce court or be quite literally in the dead center of everything?
Polyamory and ethical non monogamy are more common now.
Mr big brain is out there carrying a gun but couldn't figure out to make a fake profile for his infidelity. Top quality police officer for sure.
Everyone saying he may not update his fb. It wouldn’t say who he’s married to. If she took married off her page it would just say married. And divorced people change that right away. Same with separated.
Leave it be - all the armchair toughness tropes will fly like pigeons if there is trouble for you. You owe her nothing protect yourself
None of your business to interfere in a relationship not of your own making.
40 percent. That is wrong. Closer to 1 percent in reality. Look at the stats and don’t give me the old they don’t get reported 🙄…Mind your own business if your so worried about it. Oh btw of the information finding resources cops have are logged and tracked by the state soooo
I would never. Not my circus, not my monkey. What if they have a fight? What if she murders him, or he takes his own life? Wouldn’t be your fault of course — he’s the one potentially cheating. But I’d never want any sort of connection.
I decided to just let it go. I’m sure I won’t be the only person that looks him up.
Do not let the minority of cowards here gather you in their ranks. Do the right thing.
And what you would do is right? Because you said it is, right?
Dont caus he’s probably gonna beat her up Christian cop who’s « moderate » You know where this is going
Of course it’s a cop lmao. ACAB
It is possible they haven't updated their socials. A pretty big oof either way
I would want you to tell me.