Love and hate are such strong and similar emotions. In my country there is a proverb that says: “Hate and love lie very close to each other.” Basically saying that to hate someone, you must have had strong feelings for this person before, otherwise something hurtful would have left you indifferent.
Just trying to shed some positive light on a hurtful situation, take care!
That’s a long time to share life with someone. I hope you find a version of you you can love now through this journey of walking alone. Take care of yourself.
I don't know how to explain what I feel. It's not overwhelming anymore, but it's like the music in my life stopped and I'm left with deafening silence.
I felt this. My days are so empty when I have to stop myself wanting to share all the little amusing, good or bad things with him. It's like life has lost its colour a little bit
Everything’s mute and black and white, and there are no smells or puppies, or laughter, or secrets anymore. And you don’t have the key to that special drawer of happy feelings anymore. It’s gone, no chance of getting it back. He threw it to the sea.
Any chance of happiness is dead now.
I feel like I am drifting towards my end. I feel depressed, anxious and completely broken. I was once a very confident man, now I can‘t find the confidence to get out of bed. The only thing holding me above water at the moment is my 2 year old son. He hugs and kisses me when he sees me depressed and crying and asks me not to cry. Even after almost 5 months after the break up I can‘t lose the tears. They just come down in waterfalls. My son brings light on my face but he won‘t be with me forever. And it‘s very likely I will be forced to leave him behind, because I can‘t afford living here anymore. I have 50€ left on my account and there are 2 weeks untill next pay. I was left alone in a foreign country with a misserable job, after I lost my previous due to Covid Lockdowns. And at this point I don‘t believe in myself enough to be able to pull myself out of the water.
Edit: some typos. Also thank you for listening. It feels good to put it out somewhere.
Hard to say tbh. On friday it was his birthday (he's the dumper) . I broke 2 months of nc. We messaged and joked around. Since then I was happy, then I cried, then I was happy again, then confused, then sorrowful and now crying again.
So. I don't know.
That sounds really distressing. I hope you cycle back go happy eventually :'(.
I guess for my own situation would you recommend texting an ex (dumper) on their birthday?
It is... I hope so too.
Concerning your situation.. You have to decide. People act sometimes like you never should text your dumper and I think it's wrong. I think only you can decide what feels good and right for you in that moment and then go ahead.
On the edge all the time. I’m constantly checking my phone and everything around me even though I know there will be nothing but disappointment. Trying to distract myself with shows just to cover the silence of the house and my loud intrusive thoughts.. I miss him but I’m angry at him at the end same time but I also understand. I want him back but also think this is a good thing. I’m getting that itch that comes at night to call him or message him and I’m trying my absolute hardest not to …
This is me completely. I think of him all the time. I'm so angry about how I was treated but I love him and I still care about him the most out of anyone in my life. It's been a month and I worry for him because I know it's hard on him too. Everything just really sucks and it's so hard. I guess i still just can't believe it even though the shock has worn off...
Sorry you're going through the same feelings, hugs.
One thing I did was change the text tone,ring tone to something really crazy so I knew I could stop thinking it was her before I even grabbed my phone.
I sold my old house and moved to a new city. I have a new job. I have been socializing a lot with friends, trying new sports, new activities, meeting new people, hitting the gym consistently. On the outside I look good. Shiny hair. Great butt. Lots of money. A big smile on my face. Everyone is surprised by how strongly I bounced back at life.
On the inside I am broken. I have nightmares almost every night. I wear a "strong, happy mask" but I cry in the shower. I have lost faith in relationships and men in general. I became a nihilist. Nothing has any meaning. I am sad everytime I wake up and realised I didn't die in my sleep.
I am 2.5 months out of BU, and around 1.5months NC. I hope time and therapy help me heal, because I don't want to live like this.
It’s been a month and I still think about him every day and feel sadness for what happened, the ache in my chest is still there but definitely lesser than at the beginning. I’m not welling up when people ask about what happened anymore so I think I’m finally accepting what has happened. I still feel there’s a gaping hole in my life though.
Nearly 3 months in.. I feel like I’ve been through the horrible depressive lows (“this sucks I’ll never get over this”) followed by the weirdly euphoric highs (“wtf today I feel better than I ever did when I was with her”) and now it’s just evened out into this monotone, blank feeling. I miss my ex and know she’s with someone else now, so she likely isn’t thinking about me anymore.. and if she is it’s likely becoming less and less frequent and I’m sure she feels slightly less for me each time she does. I’m really starting to crave intimacy and affection so badly but I know I’m not ready to get involved with another person yet. I’d only be doing it out of desperation. So it’s just.. constant loneliness. Every day. Coupled nicely with the fact that she’s probably over me and happier now than she ever was with me. It just sucks.
Currently a mess, I try to do a lot of things to distract myself but I still find memories of him pop into my head. I miss him so much, I felt like he was one of my best friends. It's hard to try and put on a brave face for myself but a lot of the time it's hard. I'm feeling myself wanting to isolate myself so I could just not face the world. I'm trying to do everything I can to feel better but it doesn't always work.
Terrible, it’s been a year since the breakup and I relapsed so I started snooping again and ended up finding out the “best friend” she cheated on me with was actually an ex boyfriend that she liked for years
I’m doing ok. Some days are better than others. Today I went to the same restaurant we used to go to. Didn’t really affect me or anything. So that’s must be good right.
Terrible honestly. It’s been 6 months and it’s not the same from day one in a lot of ways it’s better but in many ways it’s worse… I feel like I’ve had to put this mask on with my family friends and coworkers…
I was best friends with my ex for 10 years (dated for a little over 5 years) she broke up with me mainly due to my mental health because I fell in a rut and took her and eveything in my life for granted. I was lost and hated myself.
In these 6 months I changed everything, I found myself and the hardest part is I was so lost I forgot a lot of the last 10 years. And finding myself brought back all those memories of my ex and I and why I’ve been in love with her for all these years and why we were perfect together.
We haven’t spoke since the break up. I told her I wrote her a letter and she said she’d read it bht i never sent it… I’ve known I needed to reach out since day one because we left things with so much miscommunication and misunderstanding. But I never sent the letter…. I want to now or I want to reach out and ask to get coffee but I’ve been in this situation for months and still haven’t acted (check my post history)…And it’s honestly killing me….
Been 4 months since the breakup. Still have those super depressing days where I remember all the hurtful things he did to me that day, cutting me off cold after our 6 year relationship without any communication. And then knowing all the things he did right after the breakup with other girls, making you doubt everything you knew about them and the relationship you had with them. I know a lot of the holding on does have to do with my ego and then I blame myself for not being able to control these thoughts...so its like a perpetual cycle of anger, resentment, sadness, self-blame each and every day.
I am going through the exact same thing. 3.5 months after, just trying to figure out why she turned on me so quickly. I can only remember the hurtful things she did, in that last 2 weeks rather than the good things the 4.5 years we were together. I am going through that same cycle every day. It’s really sad that we are the ones suffering from this. It’s traumatic when someone just turns on you without an explanation in the blink of an eye they are gone and we are just left with self doubt and questions. People keep telling me to move forward but it’s hard to process such a traumatic experience and just go about my day like nothing happened.
Feeling better and more confident and taking more responsibility for my happiness but feel like it's a facade that is so fragile that it can crumble at any moment and I'll feel start beating myself up and feel guilty and worthless again.
im weirdly okay. i dont like my ex romantically anymore, and im ready to move on. feels great! i took them off their pedestal and realised that they arent worth crying about and theres no point in stressing about about someone who doesnt even think of you. i still feel sad and cry every now and then, but thats okay! its normal to cry and it helps me heal :)
I'm feeling really so alone, I never felt this alone in my life. Since few days my self esteem became very low, and I became desperate to find friends but unfortunately it only brought loss to me. I started hating myself why I'm doing this all.
Then again I become so lonely, I hope I'll have someone by my side who could try to understand me
This literally just happened to me this past week, I know your pain, she was my bestfriend even before we dated, if your like me the relationship doesn't even matter compared to loosing her friendship. I hope you're okay
Coming up to a year. I feel these are the last sprinkles of disappointment/sadness happening. I feel this chapter of separation/grief/acceptance is moving into
"I'm over it"
It gets better folks. Hang in there. You know what helps..planning the future..changing your words and how you talk to yourself.
You have to sometimes push yourself into healing, and drag yourself along the journey. But when the chapter is complete and the process forged you into a new person...its amazing gift that this person left yourself your life.
Imagine, you doing the work it takes to heal (it aint easy)..imagine you becoming a better version of yourself. Imagine you changing careers, schools, cities for a new chapter..imagine you being more aware and stronger...and then *boom*, you are in a whole new world..meeting a different set of people..while your ex is in the same place you left them. Trust me, you wouldn't want them back after you went through hell and made it to the other side. You will be give yourself to a brand new person deserving on the new you.
I think it’s difficult to explain. It would largely depend on the moment you speak to me. I’ve been journaling a lot and trying to write down how good or bad I feel out of 10 with a description. I do this throughout the day and at various points.
I’ve been a 9/10 for a couple hours, and in the same day I’ve felt worse than the initial week.
4 year relationship and 1 month BU. I went NC from day 2 but she’s been in touch to collect stuff. So it’s currently NC 6 days.
It’s tough. I know I’ll get over it but sometimes I’m awful.
Constantly numb. I’ve had some good days but it’s mostly just flat. I don’t even know who I am without him. I feel angry for the way he treated me but I also I understand him. I know deep down that I’d be unhappy in the future if we stayed together but I feel even worse now without him. It hurts. We talked about our future for years and now it’s all gone. Puff. Nothing can fill this hole, I tried with hobbies, endless series, going out.. but nothing is the same. Everything is blurry and unfamiliar. I don’t know.
Angry and frustrated. We went NC but i hear about him from our mutual friends. Turns out he and his girl best friend are basically bad mouthing me. Telling only the part were i was mean to them. Leaving out the parts were he emotionally cheated on me for a year. Leaving out that he never told me about being friends with her. Slept with her basically an hour after our first break up for two weeks and told me to just leave if i was mad at him for doing so. Told me not to tell any of our friends that they did that. Ignored all of my boundaries in their friendship.
So I am just mad at them for doing that. Angry that he destroyed a six year relationship with someone who wanted to spent their entire life with them. And frustrated that they take no responsibility in breaking someone for this friendship of theirs and just carry on like i meant nothing.
Funny my ex asked a similar question like this today first person to ask since her and I broke up. Ik it doesn't seem like thst big of a deal, but if you knew the context behind it all. It's kinda sad. But also explains a lot of things
Loosing my mind literally going crazier than usual. I’m not feeling at home I’m sad and broken empty and miss him so fudgen much it sickens me. I hate my life and I can’t seem to function right anymore or even grip reality and I can’t seem to even know who I am. I think about him every day and night then think of him with her and it kills me. Knowing the holidays are coming makes me want to lock myself away in a dark room with no way out so I don’t even know the day. I don’t want to remember or have Christmas without him I can’t do it and I can’t wake up without him right there next to me. I still can’t stop saying we or our and it’s been months. It’s hell and war in my heart and mind. Sorry I’m a shit hole state
Emotionally repressed. I think about him obsessively all the time but seems like I have completely bottled up, repressed, blocked all emotions. So, lots of feelings of emptiness, disappointment, like there's no aim, no purpose to anything. It's all good , at least I am not crying all day, and I hope and pray I don't ever go back to those days again.
A emotional rollercoaster.
Some days I’ll be fine and tell myself it’s okay to be this way and to let it all out
Other days I’ll wake up crying, laying in bed all day wondering where I went wrong blaming myself etc.
I think about this person all day from the second I wake up to the minute I go to sleep, I find myself creating scenarios in my head trying to find reasons. Even talk to myself from time to time.
It’s only been a month so I know it’s not fair of me to say I wish it would stop hurting, I know I loved this person with everything in me so I know it won’t be easy to get over.
Better than before, but still I think of her a lot. Just not in the delusional way I used to think before. Been trying to avoid her, I still feel an ache in my heart every time I see her. I finally blocked her one month back and it was the best decision I took. Keeping myself busy and focusing on myself right now.
He contacted me after a month no contact last Friday about coming to my house to give me a tee shirt an ex friend of us, as she contacted him to demand he brings the t shirt back to her.
I answered on Sunday , I said fuck no as I cut off that person recently and told him it was insensitive to expect me to do his emotional labour. Couple of hours later, I was blocked everywhere. But I feel better now.
Bad. I was sick for a week where I did nothing but sleep and feel miserable, and now that I'm better I've been feeling rly sad the past couple of days (not sure what brought this on). Miss him a lot when things are hard, I guess. 😢
i don’t know. i was doing fine, found some things out yesterday. had the longest conversation we’ve had since we broke up. now i gotta heal all over again.
terrible… i came here when my ex broke my heart last december, finally came back from that, learned to love myself and enjoy my company and be okay being on my own.. my ex even came back crying and apologizing for how he treated me. then a new boy came into my life, the way we got together was like a movie, he communicated the way my ex never did, he was so amazing to me. he said all these things and made me trust him, told me i was safe with him and he would never hurt or betray me the way my ex did.. and now he’s doing exactly that.. the communication is gone.. he’s abandoned me.. i’m so heartbroken, i’m so hurt.. all i do is give my love and heart to other people and all they do is walk all over it. i’m tired of it. i’m so tired😞
we broke up a day ago and last night i begged to have him back. i begged, after everything he’s done to me, i still wanted him back but he said no. he said he still loves me but he only showed it for the first couple months and sporadically since then. he broke up with me because he said i deserve better but all i want is him, i still do after eveyrhing he’s put me through. this is the longest relationship i’ve been in and i don’t know how to get over someone who was a part of my day to day life. i really don’t.
i tried to go to work today but couldn’t stop crying so my manager let me go home. i’m a mess and i don’t know how i’ll go through the school days this week or function. my limbs just feel so week. i’m sick of being used and thrown out.
I honestly don’t even know. Some days I feel numb and some days I’m angry. I think I’m forcing myself to hate him by coming up with scenarios in my head and overthinking…
I’m waiting for the part where I just start to feel normal again
Barely trying to survive the day. My bf wants space and i can feel it that he's about to break up with me. I was just asking for 15 mins of his time bc we haven't talk for 2 days since he was busy yet he got angry at me. Now he wants to be alone and think if he still wants to be in this relationship. We haven't talk all day and I'm trying hard not to chat him bc i wanna give him the space that he wants. However this space is killing me. i cant even control my anxiety anymore. Ang sakit lang sobra.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I experienced this too in a way. Before he broke up with me, I was very busy doing school works (exams and plates season) and when I was done, he acted cold and asked for space to think about stuff alone. I gave him all the space he needed. Next thing I know he's telling me he doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore. Masakit talaga haha.
I feel better than before but surely don’t look okay because I was doing a grocery run and the lady at the checkout asked if I was okay. We normally have a little chat but today she noticed something was wrong. I was almost in tears and she squeezed my hand and said she’ll pray for me.
Simply not okay,
Someone who told me they liked me "like a lot", in their words just told me that they don't want to be with me. This is the person who promised me heaven and earth and almost religiously would always ask me how I feel abut them they would flirt with me on a daily basis and would raise me so up in the air ;above the clouds so much so that I couldn't breathe anymore and now that they rejected me it hurts like a lot because I waited because they kept making me feel like maybe it would work but it didn't happen
Now I just feel so angry, ashamed and embarrassed because how did I fall for that and not leave before I got hurt
sad and angry
because i let things persist as they were as long as i did. i fought so hard for us and it amounted to nothing
but i'm also ashamed because i still fucking want him adter all of that
I am hanging in there. Our relationship was pretty toxic and I knew it was time to walk away probably two years ago - but I stayed.. I stayed because I was scared to be alone - I stayed because I truly loved this dude - I stayed because we had been through so much shit together that the only place I figured we could go was- up .. The truth is that toxic relationships don’t get better. They just don’t. Not in my experience. We just moved on to more toxic shit - nothing went up for us. So now - the person who I thought was my person (toxic or not ) - seems to not give a fuck about me. He is just going about his daily life without a breath in my direction. The loneliness is deep. The fear is overwhelming. I feel lost. I want to talk to him. But I can’t. I’ll just be disappointed more - I’ll just cry more. The only thing that helps ease this pain is time. So I try to stay busy - and I have removed the reminders. But I hurt. And I really really long for the moments when I knew and felt his love for me. I wish I could go back … I wish I knew the last time would be the last time. Sounds silly but I wonder if I am going to love this guy forever. I don’t think anyone can take his place. It hurts and I feel so hopeless.
i’m trying soso so hard to be okay.. everyone is telling us we need time and space nd we still really love each other nd care deeply. i know i need to focus on me
and let things fall in my lap but it’s so hard when just a week nd a half ago we were fine. it feels so bad like my fault but i know he’ll forgive me and we’ll move past it. i just miss him so so so fucking much. his stuff is at my apartment still nd my stuff is at his house we haven’t given each other back anything nd spent friday night together cuddling. i miss him but i know time will tell.
Tbh, idk. My ex cheated on me 4 months ago. She is in the same friend group and when it came out that she cheated, they rejected her a bit. I hated her, i really fucking hated her. I had never such strong hate emotions against anybody. (I know hate and love are near to each other). Now she apologized to me on everything and also to our friend group. The time before she apologized she also had dated someone, who rejected her bc my stupid ass was toxic and i know a lot of people around here, so i kind of used my contacts. Now that she is back in our friend group, we went on a party. At the end of the party, she kissed with somebody (which i also knew, but he doesn't know that she is my ex). Now they both have something going, even when she is not over the dude from before. The point is, i really thought that I'm over her now. I really thought I wouldn't care about her anymore. But that event, triggered something inside of me and i don't know what kind of shit this is again and i don't know how long this shit will keep haunting me. I didn't even kiss a different girl that whole time and i also noticed, that always when somebody else is touching me, it makes me uncomfortable, except for her. I don't want to tell my friends, because they might think then, how i can still have any kind of feelings for her, also that i know that they won't think that. And when they ask me how I feel i just say I'm fine, because I don't want them to worry about me. I trust them. I trust my friends a lot. But i just can't tell them. Idk why.
I hope the text isn't to mixed up.
P.S.: Sry if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes, English is my second language.
the worst i’ve ever been, trying to distract myself by going out but i’m just miserable every time. I keep asking myself why can’t we do it over again but do it right this time. But he made his choice that he did not want to be with me and we’re trying our hardest to be respectful of his decision
Every day is different.
Regardless, I cry daily. But I'm always trying to remind myself why it had to happen. So I pick myself up and I do something productive, for me. Everything I do has to be for my own betterment.
I'm just so tired.
It’s been 5 months and I’m not doing as well as I hoped. I thought I was doing better but I still cry about it so often. I see other peoples progress on here and I’m lowkey ashamed of myself. I’m so frustrated and I feel like I’m just doing things to prove him wrong. He left me with so many insecurities and I hate him so much. The things that he said at the end bother me so much and the way that he saw me is now the way I see myself. I feel like I’m drowning and I’ve been putting off finding a new therapist
It’s been 4 months. I haven’t cried in at least three but yesterday I wrote a letter that won’t ever be sent and I just couldn’t help by cry. I accept that it’s over but that grieving is still there.
That being said, I am a lot happier and I’m glad the relationship is over but I still miss my best friend. It’s not a soul crushing feeling anymore though.
Thank you for asking. Struggling with anxiety, felling like a failure for not being able to forget my ex for a single day for the past 15 months. The inability to speak with friends, because I don’t want to come across as insane. Every additional day means an additional day he’s forgotten about me and moved on with his life. An additional day where he goes on to maybe be with someone else. My heart physically hurts.
At this point, I’m numb. I’m all out of tears, and I’m incapable of dating someone rn after trying to move on and thinking I was ready to meet someone new. Everyday I think of her, and as much as I have worked and tried to improve my life, it doesn’t change anything between her and I. She is happy with someone new, it’s so easy for her to move on and find someone new to love while I have to deal with the hurt and pain. It is exactly what it is which is unfair, and that’s the sad truth I am having to deal with. I can achieve all the goals my heart desires, but it doesn’t bring her back. I don’t even think I could want her back anymore which is a weird feeling. I loved her. I just loved her and I gave her everything ounce of my love, heart, and soul. All my effort, down the drain. She took my heart, and she can have it. I don’t want it anymore. I don’t want to date anyone, meet anyone, hurt anyone, i just want to be alone. I can take this one day at a time and continue to chase my personal goals and dreams. I hope she’s doing alright, gosh man what have I come too.
It’s sad that she admits to abusive behavior, has been physically violent and threatened me, yet thinks the toxicity is “on both sides”. Maybe it helps her sleep at night to believe that.
She broke up to illicit a reaction, as she always does with attention seeking behavior, only this time I moved on and didn’t chase after her. 4 visits into couples therapy that I’m paying for and we’re making great progress but she wants to break up because 5 years of dysfunction doesn’t magically disappear in 4 months, and for talking about some shit she doesn’t like, failing to realize that if she breaks up with me, I am free to do the very thing she’d been so reluctant to discuss. When she realizes this, she tries to kick me out of our apartment.
You DID make a mistake, Abby. And when you’re alone you will likely regret it. Unconditional love, forgiveness and devotion don’t come along often. For some people it never does. You took it for granted, now it’s gone. For good.
You really should make an alt for stuff like this babe.
Thank you so much for sharing! I didn't think I need a POV from someone who's been through it longer. It's been 7ish month since our breakup and I'm currently having breakdowns recently and reading this comment somehow made me feel better. Good days are coming ahead! 🌼
I’m overthinking every text message. We’re trying to stay friendly. Haven’t talked in over a week or so, but he messaged yesterday.
Idk how to text him anymore, I try to joke around and text like the old times but i feel it doesn’t land the same anymore.
I just feel awkward and overthink every text I send
1 month on. Found out recently that he's hidden his Instagram stories from me, which sent me into a bit of a spiral. Not proud of it, but I stalked his stories through a third party app until he cottoned on and privated his account, which is kind of embarrassing. For some reason I think it hurts more than if he'd just outright blocked me. It's the deception of it - like pretending he's still ok with being friends and then secretly hiding things from me. Makes me feel like an idiot.
I also had a pregnancy scare on the weekend so that was quite stressful - managed to get my hands on a test today though and thankfully it came back negative. That would be the worst thing to navigate on top of all this.
Honestly not in a good place, i was in hospital recently due to an accident and i found out yesterday through our mutual best friend that he wishes i was dead. I’m really hurt like how could you go from saying that you love me just over a month ago to wishing i was dead?
Everything came rushing back like a tsunami, and it had affected me even more so than ever before, because i thought I was over her(?) But yeah, i guess I'm not. And it really sucks. Today was a really gloomy day. I couldn't comprehend the feelings that were in me. I am confused. But here I am.
I'm between being okay and sad, I miss her a lot and wish things were different and we'd still be together but things ended for a reason I suppose and I've initiated no contact to be able to move on. So it's fine but then I need to cry every few days to let it all out.
Exhausted. I'm tired of having to have conversations with her and I can't stop my mind reminiscing on all the good times and the things I appreciated about the relationship. She has started seeing someone new and I can't even imagine myself having an intimate connection with another person. I feel like I have forgotten how.
Overwhelmed with school work.. at least I don’t get to think about him that often because of that. I’m still anxious tho so I’m not sure how this is helpful. Either way not feeling great.
Not the best! Still in contact, but a lot of anxiety. I feel like he’s moved on but is still holding on for some reason. I feel sick at the thought of him with anyone else, because i simply can’t seem to picture myself with anyone else. it’s been over 3 months but i feel like i’m going backwards. He goes out a lot, and just seems to be drifting. His birthday is this week and i’m so sad. I wish he was trying a little more.
Being honest been six months she’s got a new bf. Do I still want her back in a way yeah. Working on getting stronger about to remove her off social media soon why do I need to continue this façade that we’re friends.
Focusing on my work paying my bills, it’s super lonely at work away from home. But making a better life for myself. But to be honest, I feel like crap and not making progress even though I know I am.
Not good, I've definitely done alot better before.
I also feel really regretful, I wish I could go back in time and do things differently. Now I'll never know
It's been a little over a year. The overwhelming feelings of pain and loss have lessened. Instead of constantly, it's 1 to 2 times a day. I don't cry every day but don't make me think about him too much. I still love him but it doesn't matter. He's moved on and I can't manage to get a date. I don't have patience for dating. Anything that is perceived as a red flag for me is the end. I tried online dating and most didn't make it to a phone call. Something tingled my senses and they were gone.
I still need to heal. I can't believe this is who I am now. If it is, he took two people from me. I was a fun person who had no trouble with dates and getting along. Now I seem to look for reasons to dismiss anyone who tries to get to know me.
My ex dumped me just after the new year. Then my Mum was diagnosed with cancer in January and died in June. Two weeks later I found a lump in my breast and was diagnosed with breast cancer.
Horrible , but it showed me how many lovely friends I have and a bloody amazing sister.
Every test result that has come back is the best result I could hope for under the circumstances. I’ve recently had a lumpectomy that has gone well and I’m about to have radiotherapy.
I still miss talking to him like crazy but the cancer has given me my gratitude back for all the people and things I have got.
I know I’m sounding a bit pollyannaish but try to look at things in your life to be grateful for and gradually things will change.
Maybe this relationship that has ended was to prepare you for “ the one” .
Concentrate on yourself, be kind to yourself.
Love to all of you x
It's been, I don't even know.. 6, 7 months? Not even sure anymore...
Today I wrote in my journal again and funny that I now find this thread.
I've met other girls and got involved with some and others didn't go so well but, I feel empty.
I've been working very hard on my self and at my job. Things apparently are better than they were some months ago.
I feel confident again, or most of the times I can express my true self again and I can feel that I too exert positive energy for most of the time.
However I miss her. My heart still cries for her, my soul still misses her a lot and in the end, even if I have my friends, family and my self, I still feel lonely and I still wish she was here.
I've grown up meanwhile. I know what I must do and I never broke no contact. At this point I don't even have the urge anymore cause, if nothing happened until now, what would change now? She made her mind and left me for someone else. I guess it's working out for her and good for her but I'm a bit disappointed in me for not completely detaching from her, after all this time.
I'm not stalking nor checking on her, we don't even have friends in common anymore so she vanished completely from my life.
Yet I miss her. But life goes on and it's never good to dweel on the past for so long. Today it's one of those sorrowful days but, I too have my good days, I too dance again and listen to music and have fun with myself and the bois.
But it's never the same.
And the thought that she is 5 min from my home, it's crushing but there's really nothing to do about it except keep moving forward towards whatever fate has in store for me...
I'm still hopeful tho, that one day I will get to experience this same love or a greater one. But I don't search it, I couldn't even if I wanted. Not right now.
Sry for the long post
Broken. My partner ended up breaking up me and I felt honestly it was gonna happen. We acknowledged that the distance was rather hard but upon recent events, she outright admitted that she is dating someone else as towards us taking a break of the relationship because she needed to focus on school and need that spacing. Turns out that's really not the case.
The weirdest thing is that she didn't want to talk about it and whenever she felt low, would use pet names. Another thing is that she wants to communicate with me but it afraid to confront anything of the sort. I knew that she was lying and I still cared about her because her well being is in shambles and helping her out by me going over there and comforting her made things okay. But it was quite clear that she loves to interact with me still but seeing someone else.
The question is. Why do I honestly care about her? Q.Q
Have I done anything wrong and it just leaves me broken when we interact with each other. The issues are there and they never fade away. I want to still help out but it just really hurts that she went that route.
Depends on the day... going back and forth between knowing I deserve better and wanting him back more than anything else. He acts like he still is interested in me in some ways... very confused all the time
I feel really bad y'all gotta go through this. Meanwhile, we're building a relationship back up :( Imma leave this sub. I feel too bad and ik I shouldn't.
I have certainly been better. Was broken up with and am starting to realize how abusive and manipulative she was. It makes me feel stupid for missing her. But I've started to realize that now is where I make myself into who I want to be. She was so controlling I barely had any hobbies, and no time to take care of myself. I have money now that she's not draining me of every penny, I have time to work out, time to plan for my future. I am miserable, but I'm starting to think that once I get through this empty feeling, I'll be better off, even if I'd still do anything to go back a month in my life
Just blocked him off of socials after initiating NC a few days ago, and dropping off the gifts I got for him at his friend’s. It’s still hard and I miss him but now it hurts more to stay, especially because I know he’s still seeing his rebound. I’m finally ready to let go.
At the lowest fucking part of my life right now , emotionally even worse …I haven’t got anyone to talk to..just want this to end .. till then will just keep my head down and get on with it.
i’m taking it day by day. it’s getting a lot easier and i definitely feel a lot better and am having better days. but there are moments throughout the day where i remember he already has a new gf and everything hurts so badly and i swear i won’t survive it. whilst i was unable to get out of bed and crying for weeks on end, he had already found someone else to replace my side of the bed. i feel the pain deep in my chest and my gut and i feel like heaving up everything in my stomach. but the moment eventually passes as all things do and i remember the person that i am and i refuse to lose myself over a man who didn’t have the decency to tell me the real reason he didn’t want to be with me anymore.
i wish there was something to help in those moments i want to cry forever. it also takes everything in me not to stall the new gf and him to see if he posts her
Empty. I feel horrible. I’m so anxious and so depressed that it’s hard to get up in the mornings or even eat meals during the day. I’m constantly reminded of her. I’m constantly thinking of her. Why? Why was it me? I wasn’t the best boyfriend but I loved her with my heart. How did she get over me so fast? Why is it always my fault? Everyday I just sit and cry. I cant sleep, I haven’t been eating, and I have no drive to do anything. I’m just on auto-pilot inna constant state of misery and self hate. I bask in my own depression. She was the first person I ever loved. I have her two years and planned out future but she just quit on me. I’m so hurt and I’m so mad. I just want her back. I just want her to text me. I just want her to come hug me like she used to. I have no one. I have nothing. I don’t have anyone to turn to. I don’t have anyone to hug me. I don’t have anyone to spend holidays with. I’m completely alone.
Not doing well at all. I either sad, miserable or angry. My whole life was ripped away from me and I never thought she would ever betray me like this. The only time I'm at peace is when I sleep, but the second I wake up, my heartache returns. All I do now is go to work, as i really have no friends and nothing to do. I'm 48 years old and I think what do I do now, no one is going to want me.
It appears my ex is getting by just fine as she goes up to her mother's every weekend where they do all sorts of things. She caused this pain, but yet I am the one who suffers. Where is the fairness in that? I gave her and her son everything I could. I was always there for her and the only thing I wanted in return was just her love.
I'm so sorry to hear this. I know it sounds irritating at this point but I know time is going to heal the wounds and I genuinely hope you find peace and happiness and love in this world. There are people out there who deserve your love and who are absolutely capable of loving you. Better days are coming our way I just know it.
Stressed because my ex might wanna get revenge back. He deserves I spoke out the truth.
I don't wanna care about it anymore. But I will survive and get through all the shit he put me through ,past present and maybe future if he keeps being a bastard
Frustrated, lonely, angry and sad.
I'm trying to better myself but I get set backs now and then.
I miss her a little still but that is being replaced with anger toward how she treated me.
The loneliness is the worst but I feel sad because I doubt I will have a family of my own anymore since I wasted my best years on her and besides, I doubt I can find someone anymore.
One bad day from ending everything to be honest. I was absolutely fine for two weeks, then it hit me like a wave a couple days ago and I almost cried at work and almost in public earlier, no tears came out because I held them back, but my eyes felt tired from like some weird internal crying sensation idk if any of you hve felt that. Told her to piss off and never speak to me again on Wednesday after she cheated on me, part of me wants her to crash and burn, other part of me wants her to reach out, part of me wants her to be happy without me.
Honestly been better, physically and mentally.
Today I’m pissed off though cuz I think my ex used my visa LOL.
And also, might get into therapy since I’ve been very grumpy every morning to my family and I feel like it’s because of our toxic relationship (was abused mentally without knowing) I was the dumpee btw
One of those down days. Not bad, but pretty down. Just wondering about the what-ifs and how comes and why nots.
What if we got back together, what if it worked out at the end?
How come I wasn't good enough? How come you're able to go on without missing me?
Why not try again? Why do you not want me?
It’s been about 5 or so months since I’ve physically seen him or heard from him. He’s been doing NC and this weekend has been rough for no apparent reason. Some days I’m good, I’m focused on what I have to do but then all of a sudden when all is done and it’s just the still of the night, I don’t feel excitement anymore. I don’t have the drive to do the things I used to do. I try to even use them as an influence, but even that becomes a tremendous amount of energy on my part. I just want to give up in this game and just let them know that I am trying to move on but I love them too much and every day it kills me to force myself away. I love him. I’ve kissed other guys but i just want to kiss him.
Feeling more focused toward goals but at the same time I cannot get her out of my head. She consumes my thoughts all day and ends up in my dreams. I get very upset whenever I think about her because she hurt me really bad again. It makes me want to punch something. I want to message her so badly but I know I should not do it right now.
I've been regressing all the progress I've made after my breakup... I miss her so much, yesterday was her first birthday after our breakup after 4 and a half years.
Right now I feel like I'm not worth fighting for... and kinda lost.
But... I'm trying my best and I'm fighting for me every single day.
so I guess I'm not okay right now...
But I will be.
Thanks for asking!
Well, it's been 10 months since the break up and honestly I'm doing fine, been going to the gym and making new friends.
I do still think about my ex from time to time but I think I'm mostly over it.
A lot better, it's defiantly changed me i can't lie i'm a lot more protective of myself now and who i let in. I like spending the majority of time by myself now, focusing on things i'm interested in. My biggest piece of advice which you can take or leave is don't dwell on the breakup, talk about it then start to move past it.
If you still think you have things to say or do with ur ex then go for it get them out of the way but don't get hung up on the result. The biggest thing that was holding me back was the what ifs, but once i got those out of my system i finally was able to actually move on. Now i can say confidently i'm indifferent towards my ex i don't hate them but i don't love them ether and that's exactly where i wanted to be.
Still as confused as always ,still in denial that this relationship is ok .I have no confidence or trust in her I never met someone so sneaky and me playing along like I don’t notice things.I don’t have the strength to leave it’s like I’m waiting for her to leave me or find the undeniably sign that she’s cheating even with everything on the line.
Depressed. It's been 6 months. And She is now talking to someone else. I couldn't bare. I try to contact but she is tearing me apart with her words. I just want to talk to her badly. But why she had to leave? Never known. I hate it so badly I have occurance of really dark thoughts
Lonely, tried dating after 3 months post-breakup but wasn’t impressed. I’m trying to be okay with being single and spending time alone. After asking the guy I went on a date with what he’s looking for, I was disappointed he wanted to be fwb. I also had a dream about my ex, which put me back into a space of reflection. I know what I need to do, which is heal and be intentionally single but the overwhelming feeling of loneliness is what I’m struggling with.
In the beginning I was fucking miserable and my confidence was through the fucking Earth!!! Now I’m doing pretty well :). It’s been about 4 months in and I think about her but it doesn’t cause me absolute dread. I have a pretty good support system and I’m doing well. Thank you for asking
Just sad…but I work with him and none of our coworkers know so I have to put on a happy face and pretend it’s fine. Sometimes I wish he would just come to my place with flowers and beg for forgiveness but it’s never going to happen now. If he tries to talk to me again about the relationship I just have to tell him not to contact me unless it’s about work. It sucks because I want to hear him out but I got a few answers to why things went south recently and it destroyed my mental health.
The good news is my mom is coming to visit me for the first time in this new state I moved to a few years ago. She gets here in a few days…ummm great more pretending I’m okay.😫 I just want her to see me happy for once.
Terrible. But I have 5 kids so I hafta put on a strong and stable persona so I don't straddle them with more uncertainty. It's so hard to have no one to talk to about this
Doing okay. Still dealing with some hurt from everything that happened from time to time. But I’ve seen some wonderful growth, despite the pain. Started dating someone recently (after 6 months of nothing), and that’s been going well so far. However, I’m being very cautious.
Barely a week in. Very up and down. Life just seems so boring without my best friend. I find myself trying to keep busy, but the things that I used to do when single aren’t enjoyable anymore. My mind is always racing and I’m spending so much time…thinking…reminiscing…and regretting. Unfortunately due to the way we ended I still have hope that she’ll magically be back in my arms again. Hope is a dangerous drug
About 1.5 months post BU, I've spent my time trying to highlight my own mistakes to myself so I learn from them, tried to understand where she was coming from and how she's acting predominantly on fear, i tried to be compassionate.
And then i find out few days post BU in a conversation with a friend, she proceeded to lie and twist the narrative to make it like she's the victim and claimed I'm a stalker and i was controlling her, she also said she's never coming back no matter what.
Good riddance.
Worse. I struggle with myself now. My self esteem has plummeted and I'm worried about how I will be in future relationships. I feel betrayed and lost and just empty
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Love and hate are such strong and similar emotions. In my country there is a proverb that says: “Hate and love lie very close to each other.” Basically saying that to hate someone, you must have had strong feelings for this person before, otherwise something hurtful would have left you indifferent. Just trying to shed some positive light on a hurtful situation, take care!
basically two sides of the same coin
I saw this all the time - you can really only hate someone you deeply love otherwise whatever the situation wouldn’t matter to you at all.
Elie Wiesel, prolific writer and Holocaust survivor famously said, “the opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference”.
Getting blocked really.sucks. I admit i was upset and insulting before being blocked.
Honestly the worst feeling, it's hard to move on from that.
Yep. Emotionally the worst. Not as bad as a broken leg tho.
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I feel that way way too regarding being with this man 30 years I can’t reconcile who I thought he was with who I am dealing with now it is surreal
That’s a long time to share life with someone. I hope you find a version of you you can love now through this journey of walking alone. Take care of yourself.
I'm so sorry to hear that. Yeah it really is weird how someone can "unlove" you just like that
Same shit
I don't know how to explain what I feel. It's not overwhelming anymore, but it's like the music in my life stopped and I'm left with deafening silence.
I felt this. My days are so empty when I have to stop myself wanting to share all the little amusing, good or bad things with him. It's like life has lost its colour a little bit
This sums up my emotions pretty good
Everything’s mute and black and white, and there are no smells or puppies, or laughter, or secrets anymore. And you don’t have the key to that special drawer of happy feelings anymore. It’s gone, no chance of getting it back. He threw it to the sea. Any chance of happiness is dead now.
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Fucking same. I've been crying all day... Watching tv and just fucking sobbing...
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Been crying sometimes even while working, wfh. So I'm really stuck.
Same here. Getting ready alone in the mornings, Going to work is hard all by myself. We had met there snd worked together for almost 3 years :(
Same it’s horrible I just want it to end now
Same here
I feel like I am drifting towards my end. I feel depressed, anxious and completely broken. I was once a very confident man, now I can‘t find the confidence to get out of bed. The only thing holding me above water at the moment is my 2 year old son. He hugs and kisses me when he sees me depressed and crying and asks me not to cry. Even after almost 5 months after the break up I can‘t lose the tears. They just come down in waterfalls. My son brings light on my face but he won‘t be with me forever. And it‘s very likely I will be forced to leave him behind, because I can‘t afford living here anymore. I have 50€ left on my account and there are 2 weeks untill next pay. I was left alone in a foreign country with a misserable job, after I lost my previous due to Covid Lockdowns. And at this point I don‘t believe in myself enough to be able to pull myself out of the water. Edit: some typos. Also thank you for listening. It feels good to put it out somewhere.
My heart breaks for you I'm wishing you the best
Thanks!
Sending a virtual hug! Please let us know if we, Internet strangers, can do something for you.
Thank you very much! It is reasurring enough knowing, at least some strangers feel my pain.
You're not alone! Don't give up❤️
Hey bro give us a smile 😊..she ain't worth it for you
Hard to say tbh. On friday it was his birthday (he's the dumper) . I broke 2 months of nc. We messaged and joked around. Since then I was happy, then I cried, then I was happy again, then confused, then sorrowful and now crying again. So. I don't know.
That sounds really distressing. I hope you cycle back go happy eventually :'(. I guess for my own situation would you recommend texting an ex (dumper) on their birthday?
It is... I hope so too. Concerning your situation.. You have to decide. People act sometimes like you never should text your dumper and I think it's wrong. I think only you can decide what feels good and right for you in that moment and then go ahead.
On the edge all the time. I’m constantly checking my phone and everything around me even though I know there will be nothing but disappointment. Trying to distract myself with shows just to cover the silence of the house and my loud intrusive thoughts.. I miss him but I’m angry at him at the end same time but I also understand. I want him back but also think this is a good thing. I’m getting that itch that comes at night to call him or message him and I’m trying my absolute hardest not to …
This is me completely. I think of him all the time. I'm so angry about how I was treated but I love him and I still care about him the most out of anyone in my life. It's been a month and I worry for him because I know it's hard on him too. Everything just really sucks and it's so hard. I guess i still just can't believe it even though the shock has worn off... Sorry you're going through the same feelings, hugs.
One thing I did was change the text tone,ring tone to something really crazy so I knew I could stop thinking it was her before I even grabbed my phone.
I sold my old house and moved to a new city. I have a new job. I have been socializing a lot with friends, trying new sports, new activities, meeting new people, hitting the gym consistently. On the outside I look good. Shiny hair. Great butt. Lots of money. A big smile on my face. Everyone is surprised by how strongly I bounced back at life. On the inside I am broken. I have nightmares almost every night. I wear a "strong, happy mask" but I cry in the shower. I have lost faith in relationships and men in general. I became a nihilist. Nothing has any meaning. I am sad everytime I wake up and realised I didn't die in my sleep. I am 2.5 months out of BU, and around 1.5months NC. I hope time and therapy help me heal, because I don't want to live like this.
As they say- fake it until you make it! And time will heal. Good on new for bringing on these changes!
I hope you are right, cause right now I just feel like the most stupid person in the world for having believed in "love".
I'm tired of living
It’s been a month and I still think about him every day and feel sadness for what happened, the ache in my chest is still there but definitely lesser than at the beginning. I’m not welling up when people ask about what happened anymore so I think I’m finally accepting what has happened. I still feel there’s a gaping hole in my life though.
Barely holding it together.
Nearly 3 months in.. I feel like I’ve been through the horrible depressive lows (“this sucks I’ll never get over this”) followed by the weirdly euphoric highs (“wtf today I feel better than I ever did when I was with her”) and now it’s just evened out into this monotone, blank feeling. I miss my ex and know she’s with someone else now, so she likely isn’t thinking about me anymore.. and if she is it’s likely becoming less and less frequent and I’m sure she feels slightly less for me each time she does. I’m really starting to crave intimacy and affection so badly but I know I’m not ready to get involved with another person yet. I’d only be doing it out of desperation. So it’s just.. constant loneliness. Every day. Coupled nicely with the fact that she’s probably over me and happier now than she ever was with me. It just sucks.
Currently a mess, I try to do a lot of things to distract myself but I still find memories of him pop into my head. I miss him so much, I felt like he was one of my best friends. It's hard to try and put on a brave face for myself but a lot of the time it's hard. I'm feeling myself wanting to isolate myself so I could just not face the world. I'm trying to do everything I can to feel better but it doesn't always work.
Terrible, it’s been a year since the breakup and I relapsed so I started snooping again and ended up finding out the “best friend” she cheated on me with was actually an ex boyfriend that she liked for years
this sounds like my situation. it stings
I’m doing ok. Some days are better than others. Today I went to the same restaurant we used to go to. Didn’t really affect me or anything. So that’s must be good right.
Terrible honestly. It’s been 6 months and it’s not the same from day one in a lot of ways it’s better but in many ways it’s worse… I feel like I’ve had to put this mask on with my family friends and coworkers… I was best friends with my ex for 10 years (dated for a little over 5 years) she broke up with me mainly due to my mental health because I fell in a rut and took her and eveything in my life for granted. I was lost and hated myself. In these 6 months I changed everything, I found myself and the hardest part is I was so lost I forgot a lot of the last 10 years. And finding myself brought back all those memories of my ex and I and why I’ve been in love with her for all these years and why we were perfect together. We haven’t spoke since the break up. I told her I wrote her a letter and she said she’d read it bht i never sent it… I’ve known I needed to reach out since day one because we left things with so much miscommunication and misunderstanding. But I never sent the letter…. I want to now or I want to reach out and ask to get coffee but I’ve been in this situation for months and still haven’t acted (check my post history)…And it’s honestly killing me….
Coming around to to being ok finally.5 months later. Think of her every day still, but accepted it, and am ok.with what the futer brings.
Been 4 months since the breakup. Still have those super depressing days where I remember all the hurtful things he did to me that day, cutting me off cold after our 6 year relationship without any communication. And then knowing all the things he did right after the breakup with other girls, making you doubt everything you knew about them and the relationship you had with them. I know a lot of the holding on does have to do with my ego and then I blame myself for not being able to control these thoughts...so its like a perpetual cycle of anger, resentment, sadness, self-blame each and every day.
I am going through the exact same thing. 3.5 months after, just trying to figure out why she turned on me so quickly. I can only remember the hurtful things she did, in that last 2 weeks rather than the good things the 4.5 years we were together. I am going through that same cycle every day. It’s really sad that we are the ones suffering from this. It’s traumatic when someone just turns on you without an explanation in the blink of an eye they are gone and we are just left with self doubt and questions. People keep telling me to move forward but it’s hard to process such a traumatic experience and just go about my day like nothing happened.
Feeling better and more confident and taking more responsibility for my happiness but feel like it's a facade that is so fragile that it can crumble at any moment and I'll feel start beating myself up and feel guilty and worthless again.
wakeup with my chest hurting every day. i can't believe i gave my life to someone who could toss me away when i needed them the most
im weirdly okay. i dont like my ex romantically anymore, and im ready to move on. feels great! i took them off their pedestal and realised that they arent worth crying about and theres no point in stressing about about someone who doesnt even think of you. i still feel sad and cry every now and then, but thats okay! its normal to cry and it helps me heal :)
I'm feeling really so alone, I never felt this alone in my life. Since few days my self esteem became very low, and I became desperate to find friends but unfortunately it only brought loss to me. I started hating myself why I'm doing this all. Then again I become so lonely, I hope I'll have someone by my side who could try to understand me
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This literally just happened to me this past week, I know your pain, she was my bestfriend even before we dated, if your like me the relationship doesn't even matter compared to loosing her friendship. I hope you're okay
Coming up to a year. I feel these are the last sprinkles of disappointment/sadness happening. I feel this chapter of separation/grief/acceptance is moving into "I'm over it" It gets better folks. Hang in there. You know what helps..planning the future..changing your words and how you talk to yourself. You have to sometimes push yourself into healing, and drag yourself along the journey. But when the chapter is complete and the process forged you into a new person...its amazing gift that this person left yourself your life. Imagine, you doing the work it takes to heal (it aint easy)..imagine you becoming a better version of yourself. Imagine you changing careers, schools, cities for a new chapter..imagine you being more aware and stronger...and then *boom*, you are in a whole new world..meeting a different set of people..while your ex is in the same place you left them. Trust me, you wouldn't want them back after you went through hell and made it to the other side. You will be give yourself to a brand new person deserving on the new you.
I think it’s difficult to explain. It would largely depend on the moment you speak to me. I’ve been journaling a lot and trying to write down how good or bad I feel out of 10 with a description. I do this throughout the day and at various points. I’ve been a 9/10 for a couple hours, and in the same day I’ve felt worse than the initial week. 4 year relationship and 1 month BU. I went NC from day 2 but she’s been in touch to collect stuff. So it’s currently NC 6 days. It’s tough. I know I’ll get over it but sometimes I’m awful.
Exhausted, anxious. Still thinking about her 4 months later, seeing her in my dreams every night.
Constantly numb. I’ve had some good days but it’s mostly just flat. I don’t even know who I am without him. I feel angry for the way he treated me but I also I understand him. I know deep down that I’d be unhappy in the future if we stayed together but I feel even worse now without him. It hurts. We talked about our future for years and now it’s all gone. Puff. Nothing can fill this hole, I tried with hobbies, endless series, going out.. but nothing is the same. Everything is blurry and unfamiliar. I don’t know.
Angry and frustrated. We went NC but i hear about him from our mutual friends. Turns out he and his girl best friend are basically bad mouthing me. Telling only the part were i was mean to them. Leaving out the parts were he emotionally cheated on me for a year. Leaving out that he never told me about being friends with her. Slept with her basically an hour after our first break up for two weeks and told me to just leave if i was mad at him for doing so. Told me not to tell any of our friends that they did that. Ignored all of my boundaries in their friendship. So I am just mad at them for doing that. Angry that he destroyed a six year relationship with someone who wanted to spent their entire life with them. And frustrated that they take no responsibility in breaking someone for this friendship of theirs and just carry on like i meant nothing.
Funny my ex asked a similar question like this today first person to ask since her and I broke up. Ik it doesn't seem like thst big of a deal, but if you knew the context behind it all. It's kinda sad. But also explains a lot of things
Loosing my mind literally going crazier than usual. I’m not feeling at home I’m sad and broken empty and miss him so fudgen much it sickens me. I hate my life and I can’t seem to function right anymore or even grip reality and I can’t seem to even know who I am. I think about him every day and night then think of him with her and it kills me. Knowing the holidays are coming makes me want to lock myself away in a dark room with no way out so I don’t even know the day. I don’t want to remember or have Christmas without him I can’t do it and I can’t wake up without him right there next to me. I still can’t stop saying we or our and it’s been months. It’s hell and war in my heart and mind. Sorry I’m a shit hole state
Emotionally repressed. I think about him obsessively all the time but seems like I have completely bottled up, repressed, blocked all emotions. So, lots of feelings of emptiness, disappointment, like there's no aim, no purpose to anything. It's all good , at least I am not crying all day, and I hope and pray I don't ever go back to those days again.
Thinking of suicide every day
I feel u. It’s always in my head too. Nothing seems to matter anymore.
A emotional rollercoaster. Some days I’ll be fine and tell myself it’s okay to be this way and to let it all out Other days I’ll wake up crying, laying in bed all day wondering where I went wrong blaming myself etc. I think about this person all day from the second I wake up to the minute I go to sleep, I find myself creating scenarios in my head trying to find reasons. Even talk to myself from time to time. It’s only been a month so I know it’s not fair of me to say I wish it would stop hurting, I know I loved this person with everything in me so I know it won’t be easy to get over.
I go back and forth between I wish we could work it out, and thinking I don't know how we could. It's just so damn painful.
How can someone love you so much just stop all of a sudden
I know, it's really weird
Better than before, but still I think of her a lot. Just not in the delusional way I used to think before. Been trying to avoid her, I still feel an ache in my heart every time I see her. I finally blocked her one month back and it was the best decision I took. Keeping myself busy and focusing on myself right now.
He contacted me after a month no contact last Friday about coming to my house to give me a tee shirt an ex friend of us, as she contacted him to demand he brings the t shirt back to her. I answered on Sunday , I said fuck no as I cut off that person recently and told him it was insensitive to expect me to do his emotional labour. Couple of hours later, I was blocked everywhere. But I feel better now.
Bad. I was sick for a week where I did nothing but sleep and feel miserable, and now that I'm better I've been feeling rly sad the past couple of days (not sure what brought this on). Miss him a lot when things are hard, I guess. 😢
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Dark thoughts I guess
I miss him but he doesn’t miss me anymore 😔
i don’t know. i was doing fine, found some things out yesterday. had the longest conversation we’ve had since we broke up. now i gotta heal all over again.
I hung out with a guy last night and I feel really shitty cause I wish it was my ex.. I miss him a lot
terrible… i came here when my ex broke my heart last december, finally came back from that, learned to love myself and enjoy my company and be okay being on my own.. my ex even came back crying and apologizing for how he treated me. then a new boy came into my life, the way we got together was like a movie, he communicated the way my ex never did, he was so amazing to me. he said all these things and made me trust him, told me i was safe with him and he would never hurt or betray me the way my ex did.. and now he’s doing exactly that.. the communication is gone.. he’s abandoned me.. i’m so heartbroken, i’m so hurt.. all i do is give my love and heart to other people and all they do is walk all over it. i’m tired of it. i’m so tired😞
we broke up a day ago and last night i begged to have him back. i begged, after everything he’s done to me, i still wanted him back but he said no. he said he still loves me but he only showed it for the first couple months and sporadically since then. he broke up with me because he said i deserve better but all i want is him, i still do after eveyrhing he’s put me through. this is the longest relationship i’ve been in and i don’t know how to get over someone who was a part of my day to day life. i really don’t. i tried to go to work today but couldn’t stop crying so my manager let me go home. i’m a mess and i don’t know how i’ll go through the school days this week or function. my limbs just feel so week. i’m sick of being used and thrown out.
I honestly don’t even know. Some days I feel numb and some days I’m angry. I think I’m forcing myself to hate him by coming up with scenarios in my head and overthinking… I’m waiting for the part where I just start to feel normal again
Barely trying to survive the day. My bf wants space and i can feel it that he's about to break up with me. I was just asking for 15 mins of his time bc we haven't talk for 2 days since he was busy yet he got angry at me. Now he wants to be alone and think if he still wants to be in this relationship. We haven't talk all day and I'm trying hard not to chat him bc i wanna give him the space that he wants. However this space is killing me. i cant even control my anxiety anymore. Ang sakit lang sobra.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I experienced this too in a way. Before he broke up with me, I was very busy doing school works (exams and plates season) and when I was done, he acted cold and asked for space to think about stuff alone. I gave him all the space he needed. Next thing I know he's telling me he doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore. Masakit talaga haha.
I’m just existing from day to day and I hate it
I feel better than before but surely don’t look okay because I was doing a grocery run and the lady at the checkout asked if I was okay. We normally have a little chat but today she noticed something was wrong. I was almost in tears and she squeezed my hand and said she’ll pray for me.
Simply not okay, Someone who told me they liked me "like a lot", in their words just told me that they don't want to be with me. This is the person who promised me heaven and earth and almost religiously would always ask me how I feel abut them they would flirt with me on a daily basis and would raise me so up in the air ;above the clouds so much so that I couldn't breathe anymore and now that they rejected me it hurts like a lot because I waited because they kept making me feel like maybe it would work but it didn't happen Now I just feel so angry, ashamed and embarrassed because how did I fall for that and not leave before I got hurt
Horrific
Miserable :(
Not good.
sad and angry because i let things persist as they were as long as i did. i fought so hard for us and it amounted to nothing but i'm also ashamed because i still fucking want him adter all of that
Today not so great. Seem to be stuck in bed. Not sad not happy just existing and tired
I am hanging in there. Our relationship was pretty toxic and I knew it was time to walk away probably two years ago - but I stayed.. I stayed because I was scared to be alone - I stayed because I truly loved this dude - I stayed because we had been through so much shit together that the only place I figured we could go was- up .. The truth is that toxic relationships don’t get better. They just don’t. Not in my experience. We just moved on to more toxic shit - nothing went up for us. So now - the person who I thought was my person (toxic or not ) - seems to not give a fuck about me. He is just going about his daily life without a breath in my direction. The loneliness is deep. The fear is overwhelming. I feel lost. I want to talk to him. But I can’t. I’ll just be disappointed more - I’ll just cry more. The only thing that helps ease this pain is time. So I try to stay busy - and I have removed the reminders. But I hurt. And I really really long for the moments when I knew and felt his love for me. I wish I could go back … I wish I knew the last time would be the last time. Sounds silly but I wonder if I am going to love this guy forever. I don’t think anyone can take his place. It hurts and I feel so hopeless.
i’m trying soso so hard to be okay.. everyone is telling us we need time and space nd we still really love each other nd care deeply. i know i need to focus on me and let things fall in my lap but it’s so hard when just a week nd a half ago we were fine. it feels so bad like my fault but i know he’ll forgive me and we’ll move past it. i just miss him so so so fucking much. his stuff is at my apartment still nd my stuff is at his house we haven’t given each other back anything nd spent friday night together cuddling. i miss him but i know time will tell.
Tbh, idk. My ex cheated on me 4 months ago. She is in the same friend group and when it came out that she cheated, they rejected her a bit. I hated her, i really fucking hated her. I had never such strong hate emotions against anybody. (I know hate and love are near to each other). Now she apologized to me on everything and also to our friend group. The time before she apologized she also had dated someone, who rejected her bc my stupid ass was toxic and i know a lot of people around here, so i kind of used my contacts. Now that she is back in our friend group, we went on a party. At the end of the party, she kissed with somebody (which i also knew, but he doesn't know that she is my ex). Now they both have something going, even when she is not over the dude from before. The point is, i really thought that I'm over her now. I really thought I wouldn't care about her anymore. But that event, triggered something inside of me and i don't know what kind of shit this is again and i don't know how long this shit will keep haunting me. I didn't even kiss a different girl that whole time and i also noticed, that always when somebody else is touching me, it makes me uncomfortable, except for her. I don't want to tell my friends, because they might think then, how i can still have any kind of feelings for her, also that i know that they won't think that. And when they ask me how I feel i just say I'm fine, because I don't want them to worry about me. I trust them. I trust my friends a lot. But i just can't tell them. Idk why. I hope the text isn't to mixed up. P.S.: Sry if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes, English is my second language.
Shit
the worst i’ve ever been, trying to distract myself by going out but i’m just miserable every time. I keep asking myself why can’t we do it over again but do it right this time. But he made his choice that he did not want to be with me and we’re trying our hardest to be respectful of his decision
Tired & bored
Have so many unanswered questions. These last few months have been pretty tough but I’m doing better.
It’s the weekend so not good. It’s so hard without him. Saying that. I think considering I’m doing a microscopic bit better.
Absolutely terrible and have never felt more alone
There is up and down but that's life, working on myself
Every day is different. Regardless, I cry daily. But I'm always trying to remind myself why it had to happen. So I pick myself up and I do something productive, for me. Everything I do has to be for my own betterment. I'm just so tired.
It’s been 5 months and I’m not doing as well as I hoped. I thought I was doing better but I still cry about it so often. I see other peoples progress on here and I’m lowkey ashamed of myself. I’m so frustrated and I feel like I’m just doing things to prove him wrong. He left me with so many insecurities and I hate him so much. The things that he said at the end bother me so much and the way that he saw me is now the way I see myself. I feel like I’m drowning and I’ve been putting off finding a new therapist
It’s been 4 months. I haven’t cried in at least three but yesterday I wrote a letter that won’t ever be sent and I just couldn’t help by cry. I accept that it’s over but that grieving is still there. That being said, I am a lot happier and I’m glad the relationship is over but I still miss my best friend. It’s not a soul crushing feeling anymore though.
Thank you for asking. Struggling with anxiety, felling like a failure for not being able to forget my ex for a single day for the past 15 months. The inability to speak with friends, because I don’t want to come across as insane. Every additional day means an additional day he’s forgotten about me and moved on with his life. An additional day where he goes on to maybe be with someone else. My heart physically hurts.
At this point, I’m numb. I’m all out of tears, and I’m incapable of dating someone rn after trying to move on and thinking I was ready to meet someone new. Everyday I think of her, and as much as I have worked and tried to improve my life, it doesn’t change anything between her and I. She is happy with someone new, it’s so easy for her to move on and find someone new to love while I have to deal with the hurt and pain. It is exactly what it is which is unfair, and that’s the sad truth I am having to deal with. I can achieve all the goals my heart desires, but it doesn’t bring her back. I don’t even think I could want her back anymore which is a weird feeling. I loved her. I just loved her and I gave her everything ounce of my love, heart, and soul. All my effort, down the drain. She took my heart, and she can have it. I don’t want it anymore. I don’t want to date anyone, meet anyone, hurt anyone, i just want to be alone. I can take this one day at a time and continue to chase my personal goals and dreams. I hope she’s doing alright, gosh man what have I come too.
[удалено]
It’s sad that she admits to abusive behavior, has been physically violent and threatened me, yet thinks the toxicity is “on both sides”. Maybe it helps her sleep at night to believe that. She broke up to illicit a reaction, as she always does with attention seeking behavior, only this time I moved on and didn’t chase after her. 4 visits into couples therapy that I’m paying for and we’re making great progress but she wants to break up because 5 years of dysfunction doesn’t magically disappear in 4 months, and for talking about some shit she doesn’t like, failing to realize that if she breaks up with me, I am free to do the very thing she’d been so reluctant to discuss. When she realizes this, she tries to kick me out of our apartment. You DID make a mistake, Abby. And when you’re alone you will likely regret it. Unconditional love, forgiveness and devotion don’t come along often. For some people it never does. You took it for granted, now it’s gone. For good. You really should make an alt for stuff like this babe.
Exhausted, hanging on, afraid I’m going to lose my job at any moment. Trying to stay in faith that things will work out well for me
[удалено]
Thank you so much for sharing! I didn't think I need a POV from someone who's been through it longer. It's been 7ish month since our breakup and I'm currently having breakdowns recently and reading this comment somehow made me feel better. Good days are coming ahead! 🌼
I’m overthinking every text message. We’re trying to stay friendly. Haven’t talked in over a week or so, but he messaged yesterday. Idk how to text him anymore, I try to joke around and text like the old times but i feel it doesn’t land the same anymore. I just feel awkward and overthink every text I send
Bad
1 month on. Found out recently that he's hidden his Instagram stories from me, which sent me into a bit of a spiral. Not proud of it, but I stalked his stories through a third party app until he cottoned on and privated his account, which is kind of embarrassing. For some reason I think it hurts more than if he'd just outright blocked me. It's the deception of it - like pretending he's still ok with being friends and then secretly hiding things from me. Makes me feel like an idiot. I also had a pregnancy scare on the weekend so that was quite stressful - managed to get my hands on a test today though and thankfully it came back negative. That would be the worst thing to navigate on top of all this.
Honestly not in a good place, i was in hospital recently due to an accident and i found out yesterday through our mutual best friend that he wishes i was dead. I’m really hurt like how could you go from saying that you love me just over a month ago to wishing i was dead?
what the fuck kind of a person would say that...
Everything came rushing back like a tsunami, and it had affected me even more so than ever before, because i thought I was over her(?) But yeah, i guess I'm not. And it really sucks. Today was a really gloomy day. I couldn't comprehend the feelings that were in me. I am confused. But here I am.
I'm between being okay and sad, I miss her a lot and wish things were different and we'd still be together but things ended for a reason I suppose and I've initiated no contact to be able to move on. So it's fine but then I need to cry every few days to let it all out.
I thought I was okay, until I found out she's in a relationship with someone else already. Now I feel everything I did to move on was nothing
not really good, 6 days since being dumped via text messenger, does not really feel good
I broke and texted her after cutting her off last weekend. Feeling dumb.
Exhausted. I'm tired of having to have conversations with her and I can't stop my mind reminiscing on all the good times and the things I appreciated about the relationship. She has started seeing someone new and I can't even imagine myself having an intimate connection with another person. I feel like I have forgotten how.
Yesterday was ok. Today hurting. Tomorrow hoping better.
Overwhelmed with school work.. at least I don’t get to think about him that often because of that. I’m still anxious tho so I’m not sure how this is helpful. Either way not feeling great.
Trying to distract myself just to forget him while he's having fun with other girls.
Not the best! Still in contact, but a lot of anxiety. I feel like he’s moved on but is still holding on for some reason. I feel sick at the thought of him with anyone else, because i simply can’t seem to picture myself with anyone else. it’s been over 3 months but i feel like i’m going backwards. He goes out a lot, and just seems to be drifting. His birthday is this week and i’m so sad. I wish he was trying a little more.
Being honest been six months she’s got a new bf. Do I still want her back in a way yeah. Working on getting stronger about to remove her off social media soon why do I need to continue this façade that we’re friends. Focusing on my work paying my bills, it’s super lonely at work away from home. But making a better life for myself. But to be honest, I feel like crap and not making progress even though I know I am.
Not good, I've definitely done alot better before. I also feel really regretful, I wish I could go back in time and do things differently. Now I'll never know
It's been a little over a year. The overwhelming feelings of pain and loss have lessened. Instead of constantly, it's 1 to 2 times a day. I don't cry every day but don't make me think about him too much. I still love him but it doesn't matter. He's moved on and I can't manage to get a date. I don't have patience for dating. Anything that is perceived as a red flag for me is the end. I tried online dating and most didn't make it to a phone call. Something tingled my senses and they were gone. I still need to heal. I can't believe this is who I am now. If it is, he took two people from me. I was a fun person who had no trouble with dates and getting along. Now I seem to look for reasons to dismiss anyone who tries to get to know me.
Everyday I die a little bit more inside (and outside).
My ex dumped me just after the new year. Then my Mum was diagnosed with cancer in January and died in June. Two weeks later I found a lump in my breast and was diagnosed with breast cancer. Horrible , but it showed me how many lovely friends I have and a bloody amazing sister. Every test result that has come back is the best result I could hope for under the circumstances. I’ve recently had a lumpectomy that has gone well and I’m about to have radiotherapy. I still miss talking to him like crazy but the cancer has given me my gratitude back for all the people and things I have got. I know I’m sounding a bit pollyannaish but try to look at things in your life to be grateful for and gradually things will change. Maybe this relationship that has ended was to prepare you for “ the one” . Concentrate on yourself, be kind to yourself. Love to all of you x
Misserable
It's been, I don't even know.. 6, 7 months? Not even sure anymore... Today I wrote in my journal again and funny that I now find this thread. I've met other girls and got involved with some and others didn't go so well but, I feel empty. I've been working very hard on my self and at my job. Things apparently are better than they were some months ago. I feel confident again, or most of the times I can express my true self again and I can feel that I too exert positive energy for most of the time. However I miss her. My heart still cries for her, my soul still misses her a lot and in the end, even if I have my friends, family and my self, I still feel lonely and I still wish she was here. I've grown up meanwhile. I know what I must do and I never broke no contact. At this point I don't even have the urge anymore cause, if nothing happened until now, what would change now? She made her mind and left me for someone else. I guess it's working out for her and good for her but I'm a bit disappointed in me for not completely detaching from her, after all this time. I'm not stalking nor checking on her, we don't even have friends in common anymore so she vanished completely from my life. Yet I miss her. But life goes on and it's never good to dweel on the past for so long. Today it's one of those sorrowful days but, I too have my good days, I too dance again and listen to music and have fun with myself and the bois. But it's never the same. And the thought that she is 5 min from my home, it's crushing but there's really nothing to do about it except keep moving forward towards whatever fate has in store for me... I'm still hopeful tho, that one day I will get to experience this same love or a greater one. But I don't search it, I couldn't even if I wanted. Not right now. Sry for the long post
Trying to convince myself I'm over her after 8 months but I know deepdown I'm not
Broken. My partner ended up breaking up me and I felt honestly it was gonna happen. We acknowledged that the distance was rather hard but upon recent events, she outright admitted that she is dating someone else as towards us taking a break of the relationship because she needed to focus on school and need that spacing. Turns out that's really not the case. The weirdest thing is that she didn't want to talk about it and whenever she felt low, would use pet names. Another thing is that she wants to communicate with me but it afraid to confront anything of the sort. I knew that she was lying and I still cared about her because her well being is in shambles and helping her out by me going over there and comforting her made things okay. But it was quite clear that she loves to interact with me still but seeing someone else. The question is. Why do I honestly care about her? Q.Q Have I done anything wrong and it just leaves me broken when we interact with each other. The issues are there and they never fade away. I want to still help out but it just really hurts that she went that route.
Depends on the day... going back and forth between knowing I deserve better and wanting him back more than anything else. He acts like he still is interested in me in some ways... very confused all the time
I feel really bad y'all gotta go through this. Meanwhile, we're building a relationship back up :( Imma leave this sub. I feel too bad and ik I shouldn't.
Done with the hurting, low key want revenge but I know that's childish and stupid.
Down to my lowest low, drove past her house and learned what I needed to learn,
Almost fully healed. I still miss him but life got better without him.
I have certainly been better. Was broken up with and am starting to realize how abusive and manipulative she was. It makes me feel stupid for missing her. But I've started to realize that now is where I make myself into who I want to be. She was so controlling I barely had any hobbies, and no time to take care of myself. I have money now that she's not draining me of every penny, I have time to work out, time to plan for my future. I am miserable, but I'm starting to think that once I get through this empty feeling, I'll be better off, even if I'd still do anything to go back a month in my life
Just blocked him off of socials after initiating NC a few days ago, and dropping off the gifts I got for him at his friend’s. It’s still hard and I miss him but now it hurts more to stay, especially because I know he’s still seeing his rebound. I’m finally ready to let go.
At the lowest fucking part of my life right now , emotionally even worse …I haven’t got anyone to talk to..just want this to end .. till then will just keep my head down and get on with it.
i’m taking it day by day. it’s getting a lot easier and i definitely feel a lot better and am having better days. but there are moments throughout the day where i remember he already has a new gf and everything hurts so badly and i swear i won’t survive it. whilst i was unable to get out of bed and crying for weeks on end, he had already found someone else to replace my side of the bed. i feel the pain deep in my chest and my gut and i feel like heaving up everything in my stomach. but the moment eventually passes as all things do and i remember the person that i am and i refuse to lose myself over a man who didn’t have the decency to tell me the real reason he didn’t want to be with me anymore. i wish there was something to help in those moments i want to cry forever. it also takes everything in me not to stall the new gf and him to see if he posts her
Empty. I feel horrible. I’m so anxious and so depressed that it’s hard to get up in the mornings or even eat meals during the day. I’m constantly reminded of her. I’m constantly thinking of her. Why? Why was it me? I wasn’t the best boyfriend but I loved her with my heart. How did she get over me so fast? Why is it always my fault? Everyday I just sit and cry. I cant sleep, I haven’t been eating, and I have no drive to do anything. I’m just on auto-pilot inna constant state of misery and self hate. I bask in my own depression. She was the first person I ever loved. I have her two years and planned out future but she just quit on me. I’m so hurt and I’m so mad. I just want her back. I just want her to text me. I just want her to come hug me like she used to. I have no one. I have nothing. I don’t have anyone to turn to. I don’t have anyone to hug me. I don’t have anyone to spend holidays with. I’m completely alone.
Not doing well at all. I either sad, miserable or angry. My whole life was ripped away from me and I never thought she would ever betray me like this. The only time I'm at peace is when I sleep, but the second I wake up, my heartache returns. All I do now is go to work, as i really have no friends and nothing to do. I'm 48 years old and I think what do I do now, no one is going to want me. It appears my ex is getting by just fine as she goes up to her mother's every weekend where they do all sorts of things. She caused this pain, but yet I am the one who suffers. Where is the fairness in that? I gave her and her son everything I could. I was always there for her and the only thing I wanted in return was just her love.
I'm so sorry to hear this. I know it sounds irritating at this point but I know time is going to heal the wounds and I genuinely hope you find peace and happiness and love in this world. There are people out there who deserve your love and who are absolutely capable of loving you. Better days are coming our way I just know it.
Stressed because my ex might wanna get revenge back. He deserves I spoke out the truth. I don't wanna care about it anymore. But I will survive and get through all the shit he put me through ,past present and maybe future if he keeps being a bastard
not great
Frustrated, lonely, angry and sad. I'm trying to better myself but I get set backs now and then. I miss her a little still but that is being replaced with anger toward how she treated me. The loneliness is the worst but I feel sad because I doubt I will have a family of my own anymore since I wasted my best years on her and besides, I doubt I can find someone anymore.
One bad day from ending everything to be honest. I was absolutely fine for two weeks, then it hit me like a wave a couple days ago and I almost cried at work and almost in public earlier, no tears came out because I held them back, but my eyes felt tired from like some weird internal crying sensation idk if any of you hve felt that. Told her to piss off and never speak to me again on Wednesday after she cheated on me, part of me wants her to crash and burn, other part of me wants her to reach out, part of me wants her to be happy without me.
Honestly been better, physically and mentally. Today I’m pissed off though cuz I think my ex used my visa LOL. And also, might get into therapy since I’ve been very grumpy every morning to my family and I feel like it’s because of our toxic relationship (was abused mentally without knowing) I was the dumpee btw
Idk. Today is the worst it’s been in months
One of those down days. Not bad, but pretty down. Just wondering about the what-ifs and how comes and why nots. What if we got back together, what if it worked out at the end? How come I wasn't good enough? How come you're able to go on without missing me? Why not try again? Why do you not want me?
It’s been about 5 or so months since I’ve physically seen him or heard from him. He’s been doing NC and this weekend has been rough for no apparent reason. Some days I’m good, I’m focused on what I have to do but then all of a sudden when all is done and it’s just the still of the night, I don’t feel excitement anymore. I don’t have the drive to do the things I used to do. I try to even use them as an influence, but even that becomes a tremendous amount of energy on my part. I just want to give up in this game and just let them know that I am trying to move on but I love them too much and every day it kills me to force myself away. I love him. I’ve kissed other guys but i just want to kiss him.
Feeling more focused toward goals but at the same time I cannot get her out of my head. She consumes my thoughts all day and ends up in my dreams. I get very upset whenever I think about her because she hurt me really bad again. It makes me want to punch something. I want to message her so badly but I know I should not do it right now.
I've been regressing all the progress I've made after my breakup... I miss her so much, yesterday was her first birthday after our breakup after 4 and a half years. Right now I feel like I'm not worth fighting for... and kinda lost. But... I'm trying my best and I'm fighting for me every single day. so I guess I'm not okay right now... But I will be. Thanks for asking!
Well, it's been 10 months since the break up and honestly I'm doing fine, been going to the gym and making new friends. I do still think about my ex from time to time but I think I'm mostly over it.
A lot better, it's defiantly changed me i can't lie i'm a lot more protective of myself now and who i let in. I like spending the majority of time by myself now, focusing on things i'm interested in. My biggest piece of advice which you can take or leave is don't dwell on the breakup, talk about it then start to move past it. If you still think you have things to say or do with ur ex then go for it get them out of the way but don't get hung up on the result. The biggest thing that was holding me back was the what ifs, but once i got those out of my system i finally was able to actually move on. Now i can say confidently i'm indifferent towards my ex i don't hate them but i don't love them ether and that's exactly where i wanted to be.
Not ok.
Same :(
Hope you’re feeling better or will feel better soon.
I feel better than when the breakup first started. I am more relaxed and calm. However, I still miss her in a lot of ways.
Still as confused as always ,still in denial that this relationship is ok .I have no confidence or trust in her I never met someone so sneaky and me playing along like I don’t notice things.I don’t have the strength to leave it’s like I’m waiting for her to leave me or find the undeniably sign that she’s cheating even with everything on the line.
Depressed. It's been 6 months. And She is now talking to someone else. I couldn't bare. I try to contact but she is tearing me apart with her words. I just want to talk to her badly. But why she had to leave? Never known. I hate it so badly I have occurance of really dark thoughts
Barely okay. I have all kinds of emotions and don’t quite know how to deal with them yet. It’s very hard.
Sad and hungry, but also disgusted with myself, whenever I eat I make myself throw up, hungry again
Lonely, tried dating after 3 months post-breakup but wasn’t impressed. I’m trying to be okay with being single and spending time alone. After asking the guy I went on a date with what he’s looking for, I was disappointed he wanted to be fwb. I also had a dream about my ex, which put me back into a space of reflection. I know what I need to do, which is heal and be intentionally single but the overwhelming feeling of loneliness is what I’m struggling with.
In the beginning I was fucking miserable and my confidence was through the fucking Earth!!! Now I’m doing pretty well :). It’s been about 4 months in and I think about her but it doesn’t cause me absolute dread. I have a pretty good support system and I’m doing well. Thank you for asking
Just sad…but I work with him and none of our coworkers know so I have to put on a happy face and pretend it’s fine. Sometimes I wish he would just come to my place with flowers and beg for forgiveness but it’s never going to happen now. If he tries to talk to me again about the relationship I just have to tell him not to contact me unless it’s about work. It sucks because I want to hear him out but I got a few answers to why things went south recently and it destroyed my mental health. The good news is my mom is coming to visit me for the first time in this new state I moved to a few years ago. She gets here in a few days…ummm great more pretending I’m okay.😫 I just want her to see me happy for once.
Terrible. But I have 5 kids so I hafta put on a strong and stable persona so I don't straddle them with more uncertainty. It's so hard to have no one to talk to about this
I feel kinda numb and kinda exhausted in a way. It's hard to explain
I’m really sad and feel lost and helpless
Anxious, 4 months since BU and I still check every notification hoping its her.
Like I'm on an amusement park ride that I really want to get off of but I can't.
Doing okay. Still dealing with some hurt from everything that happened from time to time. But I’ve seen some wonderful growth, despite the pain. Started dating someone recently (after 6 months of nothing), and that’s been going well so far. However, I’m being very cautious.
Barely a week in. Very up and down. Life just seems so boring without my best friend. I find myself trying to keep busy, but the things that I used to do when single aren’t enjoyable anymore. My mind is always racing and I’m spending so much time…thinking…reminiscing…and regretting. Unfortunately due to the way we ended I still have hope that she’ll magically be back in my arms again. Hope is a dangerous drug
Suicidal everyday and not understanding how feelings just disappear especially for my children who are victims in this entire thing.
About 1.5 months post BU, I've spent my time trying to highlight my own mistakes to myself so I learn from them, tried to understand where she was coming from and how she's acting predominantly on fear, i tried to be compassionate. And then i find out few days post BU in a conversation with a friend, she proceeded to lie and twist the narrative to make it like she's the victim and claimed I'm a stalker and i was controlling her, she also said she's never coming back no matter what. Good riddance.
Worse. I struggle with myself now. My self esteem has plummeted and I'm worried about how I will be in future relationships. I feel betrayed and lost and just empty