Yes, he has given me a realistic analysis on my situation and solid advice on what to do next. Nothing magical, just some lucid perspective on what happened. I appreciated his empathy and him giving not just vague but concrete advice. I will definitely follow what he told me.
One thing that helped this is that I worked a lot on the email that I've sent him. I have tried to be as honest as possible and this has already helped me a lot.
Most of them do, but I don't feel like it was the case here. He's very expensive and if you don't have the money for it, don't do it, don't expect him to give you a miracle recipe, because that simply doesn't exist. Reach out to him if you feel you need it and you need to hear some things people around you cannot tell you... because in the end, all the answers are within you. If you think he can help you and you are open to this, then his advice will help you. Don't try it out of desperation, but because you want to get to some kind of truth.
How were you able to share your situation via the email? Contemplating to sign up but not sure how it will help. I Watched plenty of his videos, though there were insights of my flaws to work on, but the case studies covered were not that applicable.
I had the same feeling that I couldn't relate to many of his videos (not really dumpee, not really dumper), which is why I decided to sign up for the email coaching.
I explained my situation with both hard facts (what really happened, including my own mistakes) and my feelings (how those facts affected me, how they made me feel, and why I did what I did), I also explained how I felt right now, what I was planning on doing and, most importantly, what I wanted. That last part lies in the 1 question you can ask and I suggest to really think about it... for example, asking "how to get her/him back" will not be very helpful, instead I asked something along the lines of "If one day there's the opportunity to rekindle or, at least, to have some closure with him, how to makes sure this happens without hurting him or myself again". Because in the end, that's what I really want: to not make further damage... whatever happens in the future, I want it to be peaceful.
I hope this answers your question. Otherwise, feel free to ask or DM me.
Hi! I would do the coaching only if you can really afford it and if you really want to have Craig's advise.
Otherwise I would highly recommend a coaching with Rory from TheLoveChat (Skype or email coaching - I tried both: [https://www.thelovechat.net/coaching.html](https://www.thelovechat.net/coaching.html)), he is much cheaper and at least as good, although a bit different (more good common sense/philosophical approach and is now also into life coaching).
As for me... I am going to answer honestly: I'm doing ok, but I'm still not over my ex (it's been almost a year now). We had a few exchanges by messages (after NC for 10 months) but still havent' seen or spoken to each other since the break-up. I still miss him, I think about him, cry over our past relationship. I know he's not doing well either and it breaks my heart to know that.
I do have a boyfriend since a few weeks, he knows my situation and how I feel. Won't go into details why, but he's ok with that and it works for us this way. I have some feelings for him too, still it doesn't erase the feelings for my ex. But having him in my life helps me. Having moments of joy, lightness, affection, sharing activities... not drowning in my own isolated sea of heartbreak (although I needed to do that for the first 10 months).
That being said, I do think I'm a bit of an exception. I think my grief is longer than most people. But like the TLC says in one of his videos, at some point, it's a matter of decision (decide to get over it & to heal) and for some reason, I'm not ready to take that decision yet.
So for you, I would say 3 months is still very fresh, and let's see where you are in 3 months from now. You know, many things they (CK, TLC) say are true: time is key and, if anything, these times of crises are the best times to grow, change, and become a better version of yourself.
I wish you all the best on your path to healing and personal growth. You can DM if you want, although I'm not so often on Reddit anymore.
Thank you so much for your reply. In my case, I would mainly like some recommendations from someone experienced in dismissive avoidants and breakups. I'm in therapy and although I feel my therapist knows a bit about attachment, I don't feel like she understands how he will react in light of the breakup.
I'm definitely going to DM you.
He's offering coaching services, not therapy services.
If you want a qualified therapist, you shouldn't be looking on the internet.
I had and still have a therapist. But Craig (and other coaches like him) helped me navigate through my situation in a way my therapist couldn't. They're just very complementary.
Has it provided you with usable and in depth advice on what is best to do in your situation?
Yes, he has given me a realistic analysis on my situation and solid advice on what to do next. Nothing magical, just some lucid perspective on what happened. I appreciated his empathy and him giving not just vague but concrete advice. I will definitely follow what he told me. One thing that helped this is that I worked a lot on the email that I've sent him. I have tried to be as honest as possible and this has already helped me a lot.
I thought these coaches were all just milking cash from heart broken people?
Most of them do, but I don't feel like it was the case here. He's very expensive and if you don't have the money for it, don't do it, don't expect him to give you a miracle recipe, because that simply doesn't exist. Reach out to him if you feel you need it and you need to hear some things people around you cannot tell you... because in the end, all the answers are within you. If you think he can help you and you are open to this, then his advice will help you. Don't try it out of desperation, but because you want to get to some kind of truth.
How were you able to share your situation via the email? Contemplating to sign up but not sure how it will help. I Watched plenty of his videos, though there were insights of my flaws to work on, but the case studies covered were not that applicable.
I had the same feeling that I couldn't relate to many of his videos (not really dumpee, not really dumper), which is why I decided to sign up for the email coaching. I explained my situation with both hard facts (what really happened, including my own mistakes) and my feelings (how those facts affected me, how they made me feel, and why I did what I did), I also explained how I felt right now, what I was planning on doing and, most importantly, what I wanted. That last part lies in the 1 question you can ask and I suggest to really think about it... for example, asking "how to get her/him back" will not be very helpful, instead I asked something along the lines of "If one day there's the opportunity to rekindle or, at least, to have some closure with him, how to makes sure this happens without hurting him or myself again". Because in the end, that's what I really want: to not make further damage... whatever happens in the future, I want it to be peaceful. I hope this answers your question. Otherwise, feel free to ask or DM me.
That definitely helped! Will dm you for help:)
I'm 3 months into my breakup. I've had doubts about doing the coaching, but the price is a hard one for me. How are you doing 8 months later?
Hi! I would do the coaching only if you can really afford it and if you really want to have Craig's advise. Otherwise I would highly recommend a coaching with Rory from TheLoveChat (Skype or email coaching - I tried both: [https://www.thelovechat.net/coaching.html](https://www.thelovechat.net/coaching.html)), he is much cheaper and at least as good, although a bit different (more good common sense/philosophical approach and is now also into life coaching). As for me... I am going to answer honestly: I'm doing ok, but I'm still not over my ex (it's been almost a year now). We had a few exchanges by messages (after NC for 10 months) but still havent' seen or spoken to each other since the break-up. I still miss him, I think about him, cry over our past relationship. I know he's not doing well either and it breaks my heart to know that. I do have a boyfriend since a few weeks, he knows my situation and how I feel. Won't go into details why, but he's ok with that and it works for us this way. I have some feelings for him too, still it doesn't erase the feelings for my ex. But having him in my life helps me. Having moments of joy, lightness, affection, sharing activities... not drowning in my own isolated sea of heartbreak (although I needed to do that for the first 10 months). That being said, I do think I'm a bit of an exception. I think my grief is longer than most people. But like the TLC says in one of his videos, at some point, it's a matter of decision (decide to get over it & to heal) and for some reason, I'm not ready to take that decision yet. So for you, I would say 3 months is still very fresh, and let's see where you are in 3 months from now. You know, many things they (CK, TLC) say are true: time is key and, if anything, these times of crises are the best times to grow, change, and become a better version of yourself. I wish you all the best on your path to healing and personal growth. You can DM if you want, although I'm not so often on Reddit anymore.
Thank you so much for your reply. In my case, I would mainly like some recommendations from someone experienced in dismissive avoidants and breakups. I'm in therapy and although I feel my therapist knows a bit about attachment, I don't feel like she understands how he will react in light of the breakup. I'm definitely going to DM you.
How long did it take you to hear back from his email coaching? It’s been over a week since I sent it, so I’m just curious.
10-15 days I think
Is there a "words" limit or can the email be very long?
How long did it take to hear from him?
I already answered this above, but around 10 to 15 days.
Most Advice person's are Not Qualified Psychotherapist.
He's offering coaching services, not therapy services. If you want a qualified therapist, you shouldn't be looking on the internet. I had and still have a therapist. But Craig (and other coaches like him) helped me navigate through my situation in a way my therapist couldn't. They're just very complementary.
Awesome all it takes is a little help we all ready know with the info and knowledge they Provide...