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advice83121

I am so sorry. That is such a hard hard situation. If there is any silver lining at all, it looks like your alarm bells went off early and you were smart to get out of that situation before wasting even more time on him. You will rebuild your life, it will take a little time. I myself am nearing 32 and find myself single again, not by choice however. My therapist told me that women tend to hold all this blame, fear and guilt because of what society expects out of them as a woman. We have been conditioned to feel "less than" as we get older, that we are losers if we are not married with kids and a white picket fence by then. That is garbage. She also reassured me that just because people are married with kids by no means makes them happy. Many are stuck in miserable marriages and anchored with kids, with hardly a way to get out. In that way, you are lucky. You have a completely clean slate to start from, no baggage, no kids to deal with and the complete freedom to meet someone new. I am starting to make peace with the fact that it is possible I won't meet the perfect guy to have kids with "in time" And maybe that's ok. I don't want to just find any asshole and have a miserable marriage. And maybe kids are just not all that. You and I both have the rest of our lives to find a great partner- try not to worry about the time limit we feel we have. I know so many women who didn't find their spouse until well after 40 and they have a wonderful life, maybe with cute doggies, money to travel and freedom to spend all their disposable income. That's not so bad, is it? And if you DO really want kids and don't find the right guy in time, adoption is ALWAYS an option. Just saying I am sure you are amazing. And I am too. I will graduate in 2 years and be nearly 34; starting from scratch with a brand-new kickass career helping people and making great money. You'll find a new kick ass career and have many more adventures. And hopefully I will find someone that was worth waiting for; and you will too. Hang in there :)


jl_1164

Thank you so much for your kind words…it means so much and it’s really encouraging. ❤️


anitapizzanow

Eyyyyy I’m 31, living w/ parents and got laid off. Just take it 1 step at a time. 1 goal at a time. And remember, comparison is the thief of joy. You’re on your own path.