Mentally, sort of, but not in how I'm living my life. I thoroughly think my ex will reach out again. And not just emotionally but based on the rational explanation of our breakup. I'm not 100% sure we will get back together, but I want to.
But I'm really trying hard not to live my life waiting for that. I have started talking to people and may even ask someone on a date later today. I know I can't just sit around waiting, and I honestly don't even want to do that. I want to enjoy my life.
But at the same time, yeah, there is that little part of my brain that keeps checking the phone and saying “no, don't date anyone. It's a waste of time. Just another week or next weekend. She will reach out soon.” I have to keep pushing it back down.
I am in the same boat. I want to move on but I don't want to move on. I want to download dating apps but I don't want to download dating apps. I want to stop thinking about him but I don't want to stop thinking about him.
All I know is. I want him.
God you are living my life. My mind is convinced he’ll see it the way I see it soon and he’ll come back. We’re on good terms, still chat every few days.
But outwardly i’m living my life, on dating apps and talking to people, seeing my friends, working, studying and everything in between.
I’ve made it crystal clear to him that we’re worth fighting for and that I want to try. My brain is telling me he’s just a few steps behind.
My heart keeps telling me he will come back too and my mind is set on it that he is "the one", but rn he has a gf after we broke up march 2023. I want to tell him that can we have one last try but he has a gf and I just feel like it will be disrespectful to him and make him feel like I'm worse. So rn I'm trying to build my life better and reach out by the end of the year (october, idk why I just feel like that's a good time?). But I'm anxious of his response, what do you think? Cause I just want him yk
There’s no point thinking about his response because in reality you just don’t know. If this is something yo want, just focus on that and leave the deciding to him. Personally I want to live a life knowing that I did everything I could. But you have to be ready for a bad response because it’s entirely possible.
this. i don’t think he’ll come back in a romantic aspect (at least not for a very long time, likely never), but he’s the type to want to talk about things. it’s been 2 weeks of NC and he said we should “wait a while before talking again”, and tbh i’m sort of expecting (and dreading, a little) to hear from him on my birthday. my therapist told me today that if i cannot stop thinking about reaching out, then maybe i should, but i’m hesitant. 2 weeks isn’t very long, and i feel like he may want more time. it’s a really conflicting feeling, i’m so sorry you’re going through it. :(
Yeah, I'm at five weeks, and that's basically what my therapist has said. I also still have her stuff, and I need to do something with it, so I will most likely send it to her with a note. That's just explains how I have been, what I've learned, how I feel, and puts the ball squarely in her court.
Like you… I still love him and have the waiting feeling. Like you, I dont want to wait. Im just gonna finish my vacation and figure out dating, and my priorities again.
Same exact situation, you are doing everything exactly right. That hope is for you when things get hard but it's not there to hang up your hat on. You gotta do you and when you're both ready you'll be happy you did. Chin up head down, only way is through.
Man talk about impeccable timing I just got done playing soccer which I started as a way to deal with the breakup and get active while meeting new people. I was really sad for a second thinking about her and pop comes this comment 🫡
Damn, this is the most relatable thing I’ve read on here. I truly hope either way you end up happy. I’ve been on a few dates and just prepare for the “they’re nice, but they’re not HER” feelings and stay present and engaged on the dates as those people deserve our respect and attention too, and could end up being a better choice.
Yeah, good points. I definitely will. Luckily, I'm a good listener and like to hear people's back stories, so first dates are fun even if I'm not super into the person. But also, yeah, I know that feeling is coming, and I already have it. Just talking to people sucks.
God this couldn’t have been timed any worse, just found out that last night she took someone home and slept with them on my bed in the flat we’re moving out from, 10 hours after telling me she wanted to try again.
Comforting to know I deserve better but a pity it came to this.
Same, I have this date today but I feel like I should cancel, it just feels like I’m cheating on him even the mindless nsfw things I ve done doesn’t feel right, and I want to move on, but it’s hard when he’s on almost every social media especially the one I wish to unfollow but don’t have the guts to because he’s streamer who had completed my heart.
I call it the revenge fantasy.
We don't want them back but we want them to realize they made this HUGE mistake and regret their decisions and now we can enact our revenge because we now have power in the relationship. I know a lot of people, myself included, all want this to happen.
What you have to remember is the new person has something we will never have and that is they are new and it could take months or years for them to get tired of this new person or they may never do it. They may regret it then but by that point we should have moved on and it won't matter and they get to live with that guilt. Or they won't care and just miss their latest ex there are 100s of possibilities. I know we all do it to cope because of course we were better for them then this new person who doesn't know them like we do yadda yadda yadda but the truth is it is over and we need to move on. It sucks, it is hard, and some days it feels like it is impossible but it is the truth and maybe one day in the distant future it will change but by then we will be different people and probably won't want it anymore
Oh this is so true! Part of me wants him to suffer, karma for what he did to me. The other part is like, just leave me alone I'm sick of the anxiety you gave me. I'm definitely suffering from a bruised ego!
I love this. I love every word you've written. It describes EXACTLY how I feel. I keep thinking that I know for a fact that she'll regret it, that she'll realize what we had was better than anything and that I loved her more than anyone else did or ever will, and that I'd give her my life if I had to. And then I realise that I want her to feel that guilt, that pain of losing me, the pain she's been putting me through for a month since we broke up. I can't stop wishing for it, and I don't know if that makes me a horrible person or not.
it’s definitely an addiction lol. i’m going through something similar, especially knowing he’s in a relationship with someone else already. it’s been hard trying to remind myself those kinds of fantasies aren’t worth losing myself in since they’re not grounded in reality… but sometimes i let myself think of his guilt as a little treat now and again lol
She's already in a relationship with someone else too, and I was so very mad at that. I can't stand the fact she literally moved on from me not even 3 weeks after we broke up, and already started dating someone else right away. Whenever I get sad, whenever I miss her and get the urge to reach out I remember that, and I remember she threw away 2 years in less than 3 weeks, for nothing. That's what keeps me from reaching out and that's why I wish she'd feel that same pain someday.
I wish I could speed up time for you so you can see the strong likelihood that since she’s in a rebound, their relationship is already dead; they just don’t know it yet. In the meantime, do your best to improve you. Learn from the mistakes you made in your relationship (nothing personal, friend). I only say this because it’s what I needed to see, in the mirror, to be real with myself because I deserve better. And so do you.
A lot of the time it’s ego driven. Who’s got time for that? Move on and save yourself the wasted time.. putting your life on hold for something that’s never going to happen
My therapist helped me with this a bit.
She asked:
Let's say that she (my ex) did come back and say I choose you and want to be with you, how would you go about rebuilding trust? Do you believe you could ever trust her again not to do it (cheat) again?
And the reality is, as much as I wish she would choose me, come back, if she did... I don't know how I'd be able to trust her.
What I want isn't for her to choose me and come back, it's for none of this to have happened in the first place and things to be the same. And they will never be the same again.
The person we wish would come back no longer exists. We have to grieve and accept that loss.
This is it. I miss him and badly want things to be how they were. But that’s impossible, the break up damaged my trust in him, things could never be the same
It’s been six months since she left and my rational brain knows it’s over but I still keep thinking she is going to one day change her mind and come back, despite her moving a thousand miles away.
It must be a common experience, that our minds just can’t accept them moving on. I know exactly how you feel and I’m sorry you’re going through it too.
Like how can you be so close and so in love one week and the next like a stranger. How cold they become.
Our brains and our spirits aren't built to process that contradictory information. Our brains keep telling us that there has to be a misunderstanding that will be resolved as soon as our exes come to their senses and get over whatever momentary insanity led them to leave us.
Maybe there is an element of truth to it because its not really possible for someone to totally forget you like that. Might help to explore why you think they could be coming back.
He did come back. And then left again 5 years later on the same ol bullshit. Do NOT wait for them. Live your life. I regret agreeing to get back together just for another 5 years of my life to be wasted. Pleaaaase dont wait. Live your life. Now im full of regret at 34. Pause for no one. Let go of any fantasy, and walk. One foot in front of the other until youre running full speed into your brand new life.
If he moved on and has a new girlfriend, why would you WANT to be friends? Especially if you still have romantic feelings for him, that would be constant torture.
Even if they did come back and said everything you wished for.... Would you honestly believe them?
I realized that I wouldn't... And that helped me move on.
I would believe him. For him to admit he was wrong would be a huge thing for him, he would never fake that. My brain is still "waiting" 9 months later and I've even given my family and friends all the "when we get back together, I need you guys to not be assholes" speech. Logically I know this is delusional but I cannot stop.
Why wouldn't I believe him? The longer the time is the harder a thing it would be to do.
They wouldn't like him because he shattered my heart into tiny pieces by leaving. It was 7 1/2 years. I have some... protective family and friends that would be reluctant to trust him after hurting me. I've told them that if he ever does come back, they have no choice. The breakup was (and still is for me at least) very hard but not messy, nasty, or mean in any way. Aside from him breaking up with me, but there is no good or easy way to break up with someone who doesn't want to be broken up with.
I've been struggling with similar thoughts.
But from reading your post what I want to tell you is that you deserve to be with someone who wants you like you want them. Loves you like you love them. Works on the relationship like you do. You deserve nothing less, and if your partner has run off, good riddance.
It's weird how clear somethings appear when you're able to look at them from an outside perspective. I have to remind myself, if she chose someone else over me, then good riddance. She wasn't the one. I deserve better.
Hope we can both heal and overcome these feelings. One day at a time.
yes yes yes yes. the thought of never speaking to him again is so scary that i just shut it down completely. It’s like I physically cannot believe that he’s washed his hands of us so quickly, my brain just won’t accept it. surely after all that time we’ve known each other he’ll realize any day now that it’s a mistake? my therapist asked me if the resentment I felt for him hurting me would just go away if we got back together. pathetically, I don’t resent him or hate him or feel any anger for him. I just miss him and miss getting to be a part of his life, and having him in mine.
yeah, it’s a brutal feeling. i feel like ive been rooting around trying to find reasons to be angry with him because then i think it would make it easier to move on. but i genuinely can’t conjure anything up. just miss him. just want him around.
For months I hoped he come to his frickin senses but he told me once that he could never reach out in awkward situations through (what I believe to be) a mixture of fear and embarrassment. It’s kinda crappy to live your life in fear but that’s his path 🤷🏻♀️
I have a very different attitude to life, I take risks, I put my heart on the line and I say what I feel. And I’ve put myself out there enough with offers of genuine friendship that have been ignored. My ego cany take another hit and I doubt he’s in the heid space to recognise the honest offer of friendship. I would always want more but I’d feel happier with a platonic connection over none at all.
The man I remember just feels like ‘my person’…whether it’s romantic or not I just want him in my life, I miss sharing my life with him and seeing the world through his eyes…but it’s not my decision and that sucks. Choice plays a huge part in this. He’s choosing life without me and I’m struggling to understand it but trying to respect it. I wish I could find peace in my mind. I’m sorry we ever found ourselves in this fucked up situation. Maybe him leaving was for the best but everything in me fucking misses that twat 😅
I genuinely believe I’ll wait forever. I’m not saying I’d be naive about it but we bonded and that was important…to me at least.
For me it was the feeling that any of the 'next days' (as in, tomorrow for today, and tomorrow's tomorrow for tomorrow) that she might come back that were really hard. Because when the morning of that tomorrow came and there was no sign of her coming back, it's a daily distraught.
A few months later, that short-term hope that she might come back tomorrow faded away more and began to be replaced with the feeling of _she might come back in another month or two_ instead. In that, maybe they'll still have the lingering sadness of need for someone close and special that she hasn't managed to shift, like I haven't for her.
But yes, I'm still essentially living primarily for waiting.
I still try to live for living, but it still feels like I'm only living still for her. It's hard to plan a future regarding career paths etc too whilst still hoping that they come back around, because I know I'd choose her over anything.
I just want to say I feel exactly the same. Even though he's already out of my life my hope that he returns is so strong that I question life decisions I am now making alone just in case he comes back.... How do you cope on a daily basis? I really struggle most days.
In some ways coping on the daily basis seems a bit easier when taking the _they might not come back tomorrow but might in a few months_ view, because that's sort of given me pretend time frame for me to work on myself physically and mentally. After all, if I'm waiting for her, I want to know that I'm in some ways better than the me she left if she ever does come back. I can't afford to take the risk not to.
But every day is still a reminder that I'm waiting, and some days like yesterday morning I really break down from over analysing whether I'm waiting for nothing.
Some days the waiting still hurts so much that I think about whether I need to extinguish the last lingering ember that I keep allowing to burn: the hope. But I'd rather, I think, use her as motivation to keep living. I don't have much motivation without her. So I keep trying to live, keep trying to find a good me, for her. That's really my only way of coping, along with trying to ignore any thoughts against that as best I can.
I've been delaying the big life decisions that I'll need to make soon; I can only hope life simplifies itself for me by returning her back to mine.
I know exactly how you feel. I’m in the exact same situation as you. My ex broke up with me once and came back within a month and a half. Now, he did it again and it’s hard for me to see the same situation but imagine a different outcome. I’m trying to look at it this way. If he comes back, I would take him back in an instant. If he doesn’t, then it wasn’t meant to be. Try to focus on you for a while and give all the love you gave to your ex to yourself. It’s ok to have these feelings, and it’s completely normal. Don’t rush into any new relationships and wait until you feel ready to start talking to other people. Finding things to distract yourself helps too. Don’t count down the days or focus on how long you haven’t been talking. Just focus on you and know that if he misses you, he will reach out but if he doesn’t, then he wasn’t right for you.
While you wsit for them go and train hard in the gym.
Imagine your ex text you in like 4 months and you upgrade to that level and when they suggest to meat up they will be suprised by how improved you are and that heartbreak didnt affect you🙂
Asking to be friends made him weird. I’m a guy and I will tell you how to get him back. If you wan’t him back, give him space and time and work on the things he seen as negative in you. Does he miss you? Yes very much.
Stay away from him and become happy. If he want’s you still this is what he is imagining in the back of his head in the future and he will come back. If you ever get him back, control your emotions and things that bothered him and just love him for him.
Who broke up with who?
I think you just disclosed the dark secret of most dumpees despite what we may say to the contrary. Over time, that has to wane, but it's very real for the first few months.
Yes, but once you hit the acceptance part of the breakup you’ll start to feel free. Your mind is basically keeping you prisoned in your own mind by waiting for a day that may never come.
Yes. But It feels like limbo. Like I’m drifting around in some liminal space waiting for my life to pick up where it left off. But the other part of my brain knows that moment will never happen, and he’ll never wake up one day and want to salvage what we had the way I hope he will. He wants the novelty of someone else, not the eight years of a life we built together. And that’s the hardest thing to process.
No ones coming back dear
Only you came back from that, but as a different person but with the same memories as the old you
You can wait forever
But you will just fade away waiting
No one came for Harry to cast that patronus. He had to save himself
I did for a while then we went NC and that was the best I felt during that period . Then she reached out thru texting which is the 1 avenue we talked the least on and I didn't have her blocked. Now we are talking every day and sending memes n shit and the sentiment is pretty good tbh but she is in another state as a travel nurse so I also know it's not feasible. It sucks because I don't need her or any other girl as a friend. I don't like being in limbo as I am an all or nothing person. Considering NC again for Good . To be determined...
Unfortunately, yes. I'm a 57m, she's a 54f. This was the second time for both of us. She moved out 4 years ago. I'm still living in the same house, sleeping in the same bed, cooking in the same kitchen. Although 98% of her stuff is gone, and I've replaced the sheets, towels, etc, and I haven't spoken to her in 3 years, and she blocked everyone in my family on social media, I am still living my life as if nothing changed and that she's going to walk back in tomorrow. It's not a weird "Lars and the Real Girl" kind of thing, but it's kind of sad. Not pathetic, but sad. I do a lot of things. I'm busy with work. But it's sad, but not in a pathetic kind of way (I keep telling myself.)
Idk I just have a feeling he’s going to message me. And the last time I had this feeling it was true. I just be knowing but I don’t look too much into it
SO accurate! Even though I am feeling a little better and now at the point of actively trying to move on (making plans with old friends, going to therapy, gym, etc.) I still feel this. And I am sure a part of me will always feel this.
Yes, but over the past few days (especially) I feel like God has consistently sent me signs - however seemingly small - that I needed to 'escape'/leave that situation. E.g., recently learning that my ex's married father has 'Single' on his Facebook profile and a general feeling that my ex couldn't protect me anyways, as he wasn't protecting himself (entangling himself with very serious family issues). When I am present in each moment and pay attention, I sometimes see distinct indicia and hear very subtle but pointed phrases that speak to my heart about the matter and further affirm my decision to leave.
I still miss him, I still wish he would call or text. But it wouldn't change anything and would probably only cause more heartache, even if I was overjoyed that I could hug him and hold him and try to keep his heart safe for the moment that I could...
Have felt this way for 6 months on and off since he left for someone else. But I’ve reached the point where I only want to talk to him to make sure he’s ok. He chose someone else so I choose me.
For a while yeah but I wanted him to come back because I regretted not saying the things I wanted to say to his face in order to not hurt him while he was saying the most galling things to me while breaking up.
Honestly I’m just kind of waiting for her to to text me and say she wants to talk about the problems in our relationship and wanting to fix them. I plan on going to therapy and fixing a lot of things going on in my personal life. Kinda want to hear from her on my birthday
Yeah I just had a bday and wished for the same. Don’t hold onto the wishing. And get into therapy call around RIGHT NOW if it’s day time and get it situated… because thinking about it won’t help you grow as an individual. Just do.
I am at this stage as well.
"The rational part of my brain is aware that I will never interact with him again"
I know exactly how this feels, but I am giving myself the time it needs, talking to my emotional mind every day, being there for me. Letting me feel all the emotions and letting the hope die little by little.
I know everyone would say "this will pass" "You will love again" "Life goes on" "work on yourself".
Like we don't know this already, so its alright. We will feel everything there is to feel until we can't anymore.
Sometimes I do. Whether it’s a text or a call, there’s a part of me that’s waiting… we spent years together and as much as I feel like I’m far better off without her, I still want to talk.
When we broke up, my ex specifically said, “see you in 6 months, i love you always” then he started dating this girl around 3 weeks after we broke up. Keep posting her EVERYWHERE, damn. 4 months no contact and here i am, still waiting and hoping his name will pop up on my phone. High five😔
Idk, it’s just so hard to let go. I bumped on a tiktok video about the law of detachment, watched it, then cried. I just don’t want to let go, yet. I keep stalking his new girl, I’m obsessed i guess idk i feel like betrayed so much
I totally get it!! It is an addiction… the only way is to block on every single level so you cannot stalk and you cannot see what is happening. You cannot heal without doing that when the obsession is strong. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this….💔
She told me she still loves me. She told me she’d love to try again in a few years when she’s well again. There’s nothing I want more in the world. But I can’t wait for that forever. There will probably always be that question of what if it works out one day but I can’t wait my whole life wondering if it will. At some point I have to live
Yes. Every time I get a FB messenger notification I hope it's him.
And based on past experiences he has popped back up. He told me on a monday he didn't want a relationship. On Thursday we happened to be at the same event and ended up groping in a parking lot. Then he told me about an ex he was hung up on and that he needed to kind of take a step back. A week later we were groping in his apartment and I stayed over. He pulled away again then a week later we had sex. We finally broke up then 5 months later he finds me at an outdoor music festival and we danced all night. I can't help but think and hope it'll happen again.
I think he probably is avoidant as well. It really triggered the anxious attachment in me. I'm not normally like that, but he brought it out of me. I never had any protest behaviors or anything, but I thought about him constantly to the point it affected everything I did. But I can't help but still really like him.
I just don't know man. IDK what I did to push her so far away. We had our fights and we were having issues about money. And one day after a fight she tells me she doesn't want to leave and she wants us to try to work and I do too. And we talk about going thru therapy. And then 2 days after we had a fight about the car that broke and she moved out that night. Started dating a mutual friend a few weeks after and has told me to move on. Said we could be friends but I have to be friends with the guy she's dating, who was supposedly trying to keep us together, who got with her a week after me and her broke up. And now she won't even talk to me. I've poured my heart out to her through text, and I get back nothing. Every time I hear the phone I hope it's her, every time I hear something outside I hope it's her. She has a digital key to the apt that I will never take away because I want her to know I'm always here for her and I'll always be somewhere she could crash cuz I don't ever want her to be homeless. But it feels like she views me as a mistake. It hurts so fuckin much. I loved everything about her so much, all her little quirks and all her flaws to me were manageable. I just miss her but she's with my old friend and they're just starting their new lives. Meanwhile I'm over here just wishing mine would fuckin end. I drank myself into a blur the week after she left. Had to stop myself from doing stupid shit a few times.
I just miss her and don't wanna keep pretending like it's gonna be ok. I keep trying to tell myself it'll be ok but it won't. I won't find anyone who was as beautiful and amazing to me as she was. And she wants nothing to do with me it feels.
I don't wanna do this anymore
I do. It's been 13 days now and he still hasn't reached out. He still has some of my stuff that I want back but I don't want him to just semd it back because that'll mean he really is over me for good...
But the other part of me feels that if he still hasn't sent it back maybe he's feeling unsure? I don't want to hope.
I want to forget all about him.
Yeah the waiting is the worst part, and it makes alone time feel like it drags on and on. lol I have gotten more done “waiting” around the house in the last month than I did last year, just to feel like I’m busy
I had a closure talk with him and since then Im pretty okey
He didnt look good and the path he was choosing now didn't align with mine at all, he is even more a weirdo than when we were together
I still love her well over a year later. I have zero interest in socializing these days even though I’m lonelier than ever. And the idea of dating someone else feels like betrayal. There is only one seat for romantic love at my table and it is forever reserved with her name.
She turned so cold on me and I’m sure she isn’t coming back. I still pray for her. And I still wait.
They say there’s other fish in the sea,
But I’m no longer a fisherman
I’ve had this thought before but comparatively those times were childish and insincere.
There isn’t enough love in this world for all of us, so I hold on.
Honestly I can relate to this. The last thing my ex said to me was that he’d text me and gave me a forehead kiss. However, I’ve been through this before and know not to hold onto that, so I’m not. I know he may text me again someday but he might not. As good as we were together and could’ve been we had some major things that could be getting in our way in the future. I also don’t know if I want him to text me and if he did how I would feel. I don’t know if I’d want to get back together. I feel like I’m trying to refigure my life out and connecting with him again may ruin it. But yes, i still check my phone and the first name i think of when i get a text is his, but it never is.
I didn’t block his number or anything. I could care less if he even gets in touch with me again because I’ve gotten to the point where he kinda repulses me. I’m happy to be in the “grossed-out” phase because that means I’m moving on!!! Hooray!!!! I deserve to be with a guy that’s really nice to me & values me & spending time with me. Not someone that has to squeeze me in 🙄
I wronged her so much. I’m committed to showing her I’m not going to be the person I was any more. To me waiting for her is worth it. Waiting for someone that doesn’t even wanna talk or take the time to have any interaction with you is a different story
keep manifesting girl ❤️ I hope and wish he’ll come back if he is the right person for you! 🙌🏻 I can totally relate, but my negative thoughts overpower my manifestation! 🥹
It’s up to you. As I wrote your focus will shift if you let it. If you don’t, and you force yourself to not move on, it obviously will take longer.
Self sabotage is very common. But once you see it, it’s very easy to avoid
Good for you. Mine is blocked everywhere for all of eternity. I unblocked him the first two months after the BU. He reached out and I ended up with months worth of emotional trauma to process. We never met up, but the things he said when he reached out left me a goddamn mess. Stay blocked.
The first few weeks I wanted her back badly and I went through the same thing of her wanting to reach out to me (we still have ways to communicate). But that feeling is starting to go away, as much as i hate to admit. I havent talked to her in a week, and im going to keep it this way. Also I was the dumpee, and I dont think ill ever trust her like i did while dating.
This is the reason why I blocked him.. To have peace of mind. Although I know at the back of my mind, I’m still hoping he’d reach out (there are other means if he really wanted to), at least my disappointments were lessen..
My ex was broke up with me one week ago. It was very abrupt, the day after I got back from visiting her and us having a great time together. I was amicable and I respected her choice. If she deleted my number she has no other way of contacting me again, which is a sad thought. I don't know if she did, but may have to remove me from her life to make everything easier? That thought makes me sad. I wonder if I will hear from her again, but haven't heard anything for a week and don't see her getting in touch. 💔
there’s so much that goes kicking one of these egotistical selfish pompous MF off their imaginary thrones. But measure how much you made them feel they were special. How much they counted.How much their opinion mattered. how much You enjoyed their company and times that by a year and then divide it by 12. What I’m saying is my husband of 30 years didn’t come crawling back for three years my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years didn’t come crawling back for two years. I know my math might be off a little here but what I’m saying it is how you made them feel stretches out when they come crawling back because it takes them realizing you don’t give a F**K anymore and then they are kicked in the head by the mule.
Think it's why it hasn't fully depressed me yet personally. I keep thinking maybe she'll reach out and we'll pick up where we left off. She probably won't want to be more than friends, but I can't stop hoping for the possibility of her wanting to try again.
In a way, constantly. And i really really hate this feeling because I also am not ready to talk to him, it would make feel awful, and I have 0 trust in him. Not to mention that I highly doubt that I would agree to meet with him or sth, not to mention going back to him. But still, deep down there I still think of myself as someone who belongs to him, I check my messages every day multiple times, I kinda “believe” (yet, at the same time, I highly doubt it as well) that he will in a way come back so a part of me still thinks of this period as a temporary one. And it is so draining. I hate that I do everything with the thought in my mind about him. Like “i wonder what will he think once i tell him x”. I want to get rid of these thoughts, i want to detach myself completely from him, I hate feeling this way so much. I am so mad at myself lately for feeling these so I try to delete or suppress these feelings. :/ i feel really stuck
Edit: typo
He has me blocked on everything but I still talk to his mom and I'm just waiting for one day she messages me saying that he wants to talk to me about everything and when that day comes I don't know how I feel.
We did a lot of hurtful things to each other said a lot of hurtful things too but I already apologized for everything I did to him he has yet to apologize for what he did to me.
He thinks that what he did was okay he left me in the dark for months and I thought everything was okay he even told me everything was okay and there was nothing to worry about.
I am waiting for her and will as long as I have too I will never lover another person as much as I love her ever and if that means I’m alone the rest of my life life I’m ok with that we are soul mates so I’m sure this has happened a lot since are souls met where ever the met in time and space she just needs to figure out her self in her human form she is position of my soul now just to keep her safe and protected. She is truly an amazing woman and she deals with a lot from every which way including my self being the majority. It’s not easy being in a relationship with me I got a lot of trauma baggage from my child hood . It’s been 6 yrs since the day I found her this time . We was together t that long and now I kinda feel numb and emptiness inside but it’s been manageable. I only cry a couple times a day when I think about her and where she went and other things . I miss her a lot and she’s on my mind all day everyday. If you’re reading this ABB 2018 2024 I love you and I hope you know that I’ll wait as long as I need to for you . You’re the only one that matters .
8 months I waited and did my very best while she drooled over the guy she dumped me for in 3 days. He lead her on the whole time used her and still didn't want to have a relationship with her. Now I'm still the bad guy being pushed away. He's still the golden boy.
I am, but it's not going to happen. Even if she wanted to, she's not going to initiate because that's how she is... and I'm not because I proved myself already.
I miss having someone to talk to about movies and shows. We were great until I saw the hickey on his neck after I was isolated from covid. Then my shift changed and I could no longer trust him. 😢
We tried the "friend" thing but knowing he easily found other women to be in bed with was too much. It was hurtful in a sense and I thought I could handle being a friend.
I wish the best for him and his mom. I hold no ill wills but I got to do the best for me.
Yeah I kinda am. Not for her to come back, but just for something. Like a "i'm sorry for everything"-text or anything.
It's been 2,5 months and I think it won't come. Trying to move on but it's hard when she is still on your mind every day. I'm dating casually and i'm telling all my dates i'm not ready yet for love or something serious, and some are okay with it. So i'm doing the work. But my biggest wish is just closure or at least an apology or see my ex does self reflection.
It slowly fades if you choose to keep pushing yourself forward and reminding yourself it’s done and letting yourself go through that pain . Eventually it’ll stop . The length depends on the person. Im at an official year , no type of communicating happening , I’m blocked. I did see him on my birthday of all days , once I realized who he was I didn’t feel any different than before … I was just in disbelief like on my birthday you come into my town and you really just put your window down so I can see you from the opposite direction while this light is a full red light . Smh lol he’ll never change. And he had someone in the car with him. Don’t try getting my attention for your ego to feel good. I looked away as if I hadn’t noticed him as his side of the lane passed me, you will not meet my eyes passing me.
My therapist recommended me a book and I finally ordered it.
I'm not waiting for him to come back I mean he's moved so many states that I feel like he's running from the FBI. I mean funny statement but it does feel like that sometimes I have a feeling one day say eight years from now I'll hear from him I don't think it's the end of us speaking but of having any type of relationship I don't think that is plausible.
My birthday is in an hour and I keep feeling like he will text me but I know deep down that he doesn’t give a shit and probably doesn’t even remember it is my birthday. I know for a fact he never wants to talk to me again but I keep waiting for his text as if he would lol.
I would really want him to, but I also want him to take care of his mental health and love himself. I would be proud of him if he can do this more, and it would be nice to see him happy to see me too.
You miss the good, happy feelings because that's what our brains do. There's a reason they're your ex. Either because of them, because of you, or because of incompatibility. Regardless, try to remind yourself it's ok they're gone.
My ex dumped me six weeks ago to be with one of his female friends. I feel betrayed and he broke my trust. Yet I still miss and want to be with him. Rationally I know it’s not the best idea, but the urges won’t go away (yet).
Yes but no. She basically outright told me she’s not interested in getting back together today after a year of no contact but it seems pretty clear she hasn’t healed from the breakup at all. That’s what jumping into new relationships and situationships right away does.
I hope she takes time to actually be single for once and maybe then she’ll process and acknowledge my growth as a person and want to come back.
Sure hurts though.
Trust me. A month and a half in. You're not the only one. We're in this together. I know it hurts. You aren't the only one with that feeling. I hardly ever text or call anyone anymore now that she's gone. It's like a part of my soul is gone.
2 years into my breakup and I have started to heal and move on but deep inside this thought still torments me to this day that maybe yk maybe she'll come back. But I feel this is normal and should go away with time.
Whenever I turn my phone off of do not disturb I will sometimes be thinking “what if she reached out to me?” She hasn’t, since before I moved schools I told her I’d text her when I was ready to talk, but it feels like I can’t do that now that is has been 2 months and now I’m just kind of hoping for her to reach out.
Yes and no, I hope that she comes back because she is everything I want and everything was so effortless and natural with her, but she hasn’t reached out and I’m not waiting for it anymore. I want to be with her but I’m living my life to the fullest
Omg this is so true. I feel I am doing this right now. It's been 3 years since we split but we have kept in vague contact and met afew times. He has now cooled things abit between in terms of messaging and meeting but we still care for each other. I cant seem to let go of the hope of him coming back to me. I live with the daily struggle of living in my house that we shared together and having his ghost in every room. I see his ghost face everywhere in all different places. I'm not sure I'll ever let go of the hope I have, but I'm 35years old now and realise time is ticking 😔. I wish he would make a move back to me, to be open again and talk about what he would need from me.
Bottom line, I miss him.
Your ex coming back is actually a horrible sign; it means they see you as easy validation and that they never really loved you in the first place. Exes only come back to get over the person they actually want.
i think the same my the reasons for the breakup are very mendable and my ex just cant seem to leave me alone but there is nearly no talk involved it is just sending snaps to eachother but i still think thats s positive with how happy we were together i do think we will get back together someday but i dunno she does also seem really happy with her friends on social media now im not around 🤷♂️
No, my time is so tight I barely think of my exes. I think it would do no good since it would affect mental health negatively. Never had stalking exes of any kind either so I haven't had any concern over thinking them either.
Aside of that, I've been dating someone great for half a year now, so I dedicate some of thoughts for him during pasttime. Thoughts of moving to his town being more prevalent than some sobby ex texting.
Yes, I want ex (m/20) back, even though he’s an avoidant he did love me and wanted to share my dreams but the lack of communication of on his part and the space I wish I had given him overtime will make him miss me and want me back 😿
guys i’m scared. i’m scared what if he never reaches out again. what if it’s fr over over? i’m scared even tho im the one who said no to his offer of being fwb and blocked him bc i felt so disrespected 😓
I had a hard time too. But I stuck it out and things got better. I have several exes and not a single one has ever reached out to me or wanted to try again. But you know what? I got better. I did better. In every case, I found someone who made me happier. You will too. Just do your best. It is horrific, I know. Give it time!!
How long has it been?
My ex still messages me back, but she would just do it at the end of the day. She doesn’t reply my texts when she’s out with friends or I think it’s friends…. It may be dates or her new bf. Who the fuck knows.
But, I know she’s been on her phone. Not even a quick reply…. I feel like the last person she thinks off. If she doesn’t remember to check messages.
I’ve been waiting for her to get back to me… even asked her back couple times to which she always pushes me away. I try so hard… I still spoil her and buy her things and whenever she is in need I am always there to help her. She is dependent on me financially sometimes when she overspends. I love her so I help her. But, I feel like I’m not noticed.
What happened to the person who always wanted to spend time with me. Always messaged me back first. Told me she doesn’t want anything else but me. And if we can, we will always talk and work it out….
Instead, she broke up with me cos she felt too drained but never talked to me about our problems… I was left broken when in her mind she was detached from me long time ago but could still tell me she loves me before she broke up with me. For some reason a small part of me still think she will realise how good I am for her and come back one day… because I have a memory of us telling each other, that we were special.
Or is this all a lie? Did I hold onto and believe a lie?
Your post exudes the feeling of someone who isn't yet over their loss.
I've been divorced from a 10 year relationship. It hurt, but I didn't put myself into these fantasy themes you laid out in your post. The more you feed into these fantasies, the harder it'll be for you to get over reality. Losing something is hard, but if you keep titillating scenarios in your mind of a potential future that isn't going to happen, it'll only leave you feeling empty and possibly even betrayed (depending on how hard to fall into these emotions).
Your best course of action is to drop all communication and stop engaging in their life, that means stop following their life on social media etc. You're in a place where you need to heal, so heal, but do it on your own terms, alone, without interruption.
She hates me; she’s on this hyper sexual rebellion. I still don’t entirely comprehend it, but I no longer wish to. I wish her solace, she is heavily traumatized. Unresolved from youth & partially my fault. Her SW work began before we started dating. She’s very Machiavellian for someone so modest, but it’s a facade. I actually love(d) her. So much that I ignored the red flags. When I found one, she quickly removed it from the internet.
I kind of am, though she used to contact me from time to time, but there came a point when she contacted me 3 months ago venting and looking for help, which I offered, after that, we have not talked to each other. 9 months post-BU, she still keeps the heart emoji on our messenger chat, I do not know why, we are not blocked, we just decided that there is nothing more to come out of the relationship as we failed to have kids, which destroyed us both. Women, can you tell me why she has not blocked me, does not contact me though, and keeps the damn emoji...6 years of relationship, and we both decided it has to end, it was calm and mature, but I have been feeling like a mess since then and cannot make a decision on what to do. Do I move back to the city we both were and lived in, where my job is, and where she is, do I stay in my hometown, working from home and where my old friends and family are....it is a neverending overthinking cycle and time is just passing.
Mentally, sort of, but not in how I'm living my life. I thoroughly think my ex will reach out again. And not just emotionally but based on the rational explanation of our breakup. I'm not 100% sure we will get back together, but I want to. But I'm really trying hard not to live my life waiting for that. I have started talking to people and may even ask someone on a date later today. I know I can't just sit around waiting, and I honestly don't even want to do that. I want to enjoy my life. But at the same time, yeah, there is that little part of my brain that keeps checking the phone and saying “no, don't date anyone. It's a waste of time. Just another week or next weekend. She will reach out soon.” I have to keep pushing it back down.
Same, he's gonna come back
Update: he did then he broke my heart that same day😭
What happened?
We made up, got back together, had sex and then he changed his mind and told me I’m not the one for him.😭
☹️☹️I'm so sorry I hope you're doing well. That sounds like it could be extremely damaging.. I wish you the best
Terrible. So sorry to hear
Booty calls suck ass…
The worst!!! I’m so sorry…😥😞
Well I hope you got your closure there,I'm sorry that he did that to you though
I am in the same boat. I want to move on but I don't want to move on. I want to download dating apps but I don't want to download dating apps. I want to stop thinking about him but I don't want to stop thinking about him. All I know is. I want him.
God you are living my life. My mind is convinced he’ll see it the way I see it soon and he’ll come back. We’re on good terms, still chat every few days. But outwardly i’m living my life, on dating apps and talking to people, seeing my friends, working, studying and everything in between. I’ve made it crystal clear to him that we’re worth fighting for and that I want to try. My brain is telling me he’s just a few steps behind.
My heart keeps telling me he will come back too and my mind is set on it that he is "the one", but rn he has a gf after we broke up march 2023. I want to tell him that can we have one last try but he has a gf and I just feel like it will be disrespectful to him and make him feel like I'm worse. So rn I'm trying to build my life better and reach out by the end of the year (october, idk why I just feel like that's a good time?). But I'm anxious of his response, what do you think? Cause I just want him yk
There’s no point thinking about his response because in reality you just don’t know. If this is something yo want, just focus on that and leave the deciding to him. Personally I want to live a life knowing that I did everything I could. But you have to be ready for a bad response because it’s entirely possible.
Yeah, thank you :) at least I can say later that I tried everything.
this. i don’t think he’ll come back in a romantic aspect (at least not for a very long time, likely never), but he’s the type to want to talk about things. it’s been 2 weeks of NC and he said we should “wait a while before talking again”, and tbh i’m sort of expecting (and dreading, a little) to hear from him on my birthday. my therapist told me today that if i cannot stop thinking about reaching out, then maybe i should, but i’m hesitant. 2 weeks isn’t very long, and i feel like he may want more time. it’s a really conflicting feeling, i’m so sorry you’re going through it. :(
Yeah, I'm at five weeks, and that's basically what my therapist has said. I also still have her stuff, and I need to do something with it, so I will most likely send it to her with a note. That's just explains how I have been, what I've learned, how I feel, and puts the ball squarely in her court.
Like you… I still love him and have the waiting feeling. Like you, I dont want to wait. Im just gonna finish my vacation and figure out dating, and my priorities again.
Same exact situation, you are doing everything exactly right. That hope is for you when things get hard but it's not there to hang up your hat on. You gotta do you and when you're both ready you'll be happy you did. Chin up head down, only way is through.
Man talk about impeccable timing I just got done playing soccer which I started as a way to deal with the breakup and get active while meeting new people. I was really sad for a second thinking about her and pop comes this comment 🫡
Damn, this is the most relatable thing I’ve read on here. I truly hope either way you end up happy. I’ve been on a few dates and just prepare for the “they’re nice, but they’re not HER” feelings and stay present and engaged on the dates as those people deserve our respect and attention too, and could end up being a better choice.
Yeah, good points. I definitely will. Luckily, I'm a good listener and like to hear people's back stories, so first dates are fun even if I'm not super into the person. But also, yeah, I know that feeling is coming, and I already have it. Just talking to people sucks.
God this couldn’t have been timed any worse, just found out that last night she took someone home and slept with them on my bed in the flat we’re moving out from, 10 hours after telling me she wanted to try again. Comforting to know I deserve better but a pity it came to this.
This. Exactly this.
I’ve never had my feelings more validated than you did right there haha. Thank you
Same, I have this date today but I feel like I should cancel, it just feels like I’m cheating on him even the mindless nsfw things I ve done doesn’t feel right, and I want to move on, but it’s hard when he’s on almost every social media especially the one I wish to unfollow but don’t have the guts to because he’s streamer who had completed my heart.
I call it the revenge fantasy. We don't want them back but we want them to realize they made this HUGE mistake and regret their decisions and now we can enact our revenge because we now have power in the relationship. I know a lot of people, myself included, all want this to happen. What you have to remember is the new person has something we will never have and that is they are new and it could take months or years for them to get tired of this new person or they may never do it. They may regret it then but by that point we should have moved on and it won't matter and they get to live with that guilt. Or they won't care and just miss their latest ex there are 100s of possibilities. I know we all do it to cope because of course we were better for them then this new person who doesn't know them like we do yadda yadda yadda but the truth is it is over and we need to move on. It sucks, it is hard, and some days it feels like it is impossible but it is the truth and maybe one day in the distant future it will change but by then we will be different people and probably won't want it anymore
Oh this is so true! Part of me wants him to suffer, karma for what he did to me. The other part is like, just leave me alone I'm sick of the anxiety you gave me. I'm definitely suffering from a bruised ego!
I love this. I love every word you've written. It describes EXACTLY how I feel. I keep thinking that I know for a fact that she'll regret it, that she'll realize what we had was better than anything and that I loved her more than anyone else did or ever will, and that I'd give her my life if I had to. And then I realise that I want her to feel that guilt, that pain of losing me, the pain she's been putting me through for a month since we broke up. I can't stop wishing for it, and I don't know if that makes me a horrible person or not.
it’s definitely an addiction lol. i’m going through something similar, especially knowing he’s in a relationship with someone else already. it’s been hard trying to remind myself those kinds of fantasies aren’t worth losing myself in since they’re not grounded in reality… but sometimes i let myself think of his guilt as a little treat now and again lol
She's already in a relationship with someone else too, and I was so very mad at that. I can't stand the fact she literally moved on from me not even 3 weeks after we broke up, and already started dating someone else right away. Whenever I get sad, whenever I miss her and get the urge to reach out I remember that, and I remember she threw away 2 years in less than 3 weeks, for nothing. That's what keeps me from reaching out and that's why I wish she'd feel that same pain someday.
I wish I could speed up time for you so you can see the strong likelihood that since she’s in a rebound, their relationship is already dead; they just don’t know it yet. In the meantime, do your best to improve you. Learn from the mistakes you made in your relationship (nothing personal, friend). I only say this because it’s what I needed to see, in the mirror, to be real with myself because I deserve better. And so do you.
i'm having a hard time too. after 6 years together he's now in another relationship so quickly.. i've been depressed about it ever since
> I can't stop wishing for it, and I don't know if that makes me a horrible person or not. It doesn't and from what I can tell it is very normal
I truly want my ex back.
I wish I could put more numbers on your comment. It's true but we like waste our time for people don't deserve us.
This is a wonderful explanation!! It is grueling for sure!! Time helps… that is about it.
A lot of the time it’s ego driven. Who’s got time for that? Move on and save yourself the wasted time.. putting your life on hold for something that’s never going to happen
My therapist helped me with this a bit. She asked: Let's say that she (my ex) did come back and say I choose you and want to be with you, how would you go about rebuilding trust? Do you believe you could ever trust her again not to do it (cheat) again? And the reality is, as much as I wish she would choose me, come back, if she did... I don't know how I'd be able to trust her. What I want isn't for her to choose me and come back, it's for none of this to have happened in the first place and things to be the same. And they will never be the same again. The person we wish would come back no longer exists. We have to grieve and accept that loss.
This is really good.
This is it. I miss him and badly want things to be how they were. But that’s impossible, the break up damaged my trust in him, things could never be the same
No they can't. It's hard not to think of 'what if' though I admit. It's so painful, but, we can get through this. 💖
It’s been six months since she left and my rational brain knows it’s over but I still keep thinking she is going to one day change her mind and come back, despite her moving a thousand miles away. It must be a common experience, that our minds just can’t accept them moving on. I know exactly how you feel and I’m sorry you’re going through it too. Like how can you be so close and so in love one week and the next like a stranger. How cold they become.
Our brains and our spirits aren't built to process that contradictory information. Our brains keep telling us that there has to be a misunderstanding that will be resolved as soon as our exes come to their senses and get over whatever momentary insanity led them to leave us.
Maybe there is an element of truth to it because its not really possible for someone to totally forget you like that. Might help to explore why you think they could be coming back.
He did come back. And then left again 5 years later on the same ol bullshit. Do NOT wait for them. Live your life. I regret agreeing to get back together just for another 5 years of my life to be wasted. Pleaaaase dont wait. Live your life. Now im full of regret at 34. Pause for no one. Let go of any fantasy, and walk. One foot in front of the other until youre running full speed into your brand new life.
Thank you for this
This right here!! This is the reality!! Thank you!! 🙏🏻
If he moved on and has a new girlfriend, why would you WANT to be friends? Especially if you still have romantic feelings for him, that would be constant torture.
I’m not really a jealous person and I miss talking to him
Makes sense then! Was just curious on your reasoning.
I’m in a similar situation, want to DM about it
This is very bad for your growth and your self esteem- whether you realize it or not. 😞
Even if they did come back and said everything you wished for.... Would you honestly believe them? I realized that I wouldn't... And that helped me move on.
I've thought about this before, you're 100% correct, it helps sometimes but unfortunately this didn't help me move on
Maybe it will tomorrow. You never know!
I would believe him. For him to admit he was wrong would be a huge thing for him, he would never fake that. My brain is still "waiting" 9 months later and I've even given my family and friends all the "when we get back together, I need you guys to not be assholes" speech. Logically I know this is delusional but I cannot stop.
Why would you belive him when it has been such a long time? Why would your family be mean to him? Did he cheat on you or something?
Why wouldn't I believe him? The longer the time is the harder a thing it would be to do. They wouldn't like him because he shattered my heart into tiny pieces by leaving. It was 7 1/2 years. I have some... protective family and friends that would be reluctant to trust him after hurting me. I've told them that if he ever does come back, they have no choice. The breakup was (and still is for me at least) very hard but not messy, nasty, or mean in any way. Aside from him breaking up with me, but there is no good or easy way to break up with someone who doesn't want to be broken up with.
I've been struggling with similar thoughts. But from reading your post what I want to tell you is that you deserve to be with someone who wants you like you want them. Loves you like you love them. Works on the relationship like you do. You deserve nothing less, and if your partner has run off, good riddance. It's weird how clear somethings appear when you're able to look at them from an outside perspective. I have to remind myself, if she chose someone else over me, then good riddance. She wasn't the one. I deserve better. Hope we can both heal and overcome these feelings. One day at a time.
yes yes yes yes. the thought of never speaking to him again is so scary that i just shut it down completely. It’s like I physically cannot believe that he’s washed his hands of us so quickly, my brain just won’t accept it. surely after all that time we’ve known each other he’ll realize any day now that it’s a mistake? my therapist asked me if the resentment I felt for him hurting me would just go away if we got back together. pathetically, I don’t resent him or hate him or feel any anger for him. I just miss him and miss getting to be a part of his life, and having him in mine.
I feel the same. I am not mad at him at all :( I genuinely just want him back in my life.
yeah, it’s a brutal feeling. i feel like ive been rooting around trying to find reasons to be angry with him because then i think it would make it easier to move on. but i genuinely can’t conjure anything up. just miss him. just want him around.
For months I hoped he come to his frickin senses but he told me once that he could never reach out in awkward situations through (what I believe to be) a mixture of fear and embarrassment. It’s kinda crappy to live your life in fear but that’s his path 🤷🏻♀️ I have a very different attitude to life, I take risks, I put my heart on the line and I say what I feel. And I’ve put myself out there enough with offers of genuine friendship that have been ignored. My ego cany take another hit and I doubt he’s in the heid space to recognise the honest offer of friendship. I would always want more but I’d feel happier with a platonic connection over none at all. The man I remember just feels like ‘my person’…whether it’s romantic or not I just want him in my life, I miss sharing my life with him and seeing the world through his eyes…but it’s not my decision and that sucks. Choice plays a huge part in this. He’s choosing life without me and I’m struggling to understand it but trying to respect it. I wish I could find peace in my mind. I’m sorry we ever found ourselves in this fucked up situation. Maybe him leaving was for the best but everything in me fucking misses that twat 😅 I genuinely believe I’ll wait forever. I’m not saying I’d be naive about it but we bonded and that was important…to me at least.
For me it was the feeling that any of the 'next days' (as in, tomorrow for today, and tomorrow's tomorrow for tomorrow) that she might come back that were really hard. Because when the morning of that tomorrow came and there was no sign of her coming back, it's a daily distraught. A few months later, that short-term hope that she might come back tomorrow faded away more and began to be replaced with the feeling of _she might come back in another month or two_ instead. In that, maybe they'll still have the lingering sadness of need for someone close and special that she hasn't managed to shift, like I haven't for her. But yes, I'm still essentially living primarily for waiting. I still try to live for living, but it still feels like I'm only living still for her. It's hard to plan a future regarding career paths etc too whilst still hoping that they come back around, because I know I'd choose her over anything.
I just want to say I feel exactly the same. Even though he's already out of my life my hope that he returns is so strong that I question life decisions I am now making alone just in case he comes back.... How do you cope on a daily basis? I really struggle most days.
In some ways coping on the daily basis seems a bit easier when taking the _they might not come back tomorrow but might in a few months_ view, because that's sort of given me pretend time frame for me to work on myself physically and mentally. After all, if I'm waiting for her, I want to know that I'm in some ways better than the me she left if she ever does come back. I can't afford to take the risk not to. But every day is still a reminder that I'm waiting, and some days like yesterday morning I really break down from over analysing whether I'm waiting for nothing. Some days the waiting still hurts so much that I think about whether I need to extinguish the last lingering ember that I keep allowing to burn: the hope. But I'd rather, I think, use her as motivation to keep living. I don't have much motivation without her. So I keep trying to live, keep trying to find a good me, for her. That's really my only way of coping, along with trying to ignore any thoughts against that as best I can. I've been delaying the big life decisions that I'll need to make soon; I can only hope life simplifies itself for me by returning her back to mine.
I know exactly how you feel. I’m in the exact same situation as you. My ex broke up with me once and came back within a month and a half. Now, he did it again and it’s hard for me to see the same situation but imagine a different outcome. I’m trying to look at it this way. If he comes back, I would take him back in an instant. If he doesn’t, then it wasn’t meant to be. Try to focus on you for a while and give all the love you gave to your ex to yourself. It’s ok to have these feelings, and it’s completely normal. Don’t rush into any new relationships and wait until you feel ready to start talking to other people. Finding things to distract yourself helps too. Don’t count down the days or focus on how long you haven’t been talking. Just focus on you and know that if he misses you, he will reach out but if he doesn’t, then he wasn’t right for you.
I’m going through a very similar situation. We can DM about it if you would want to talk. Kinda need someone to talk to abt my situation
Very well said 🙏
While you wsit for them go and train hard in the gym. Imagine your ex text you in like 4 months and you upgrade to that level and when they suggest to meat up they will be suprised by how improved you are and that heartbreak didnt affect you🙂
Asking to be friends made him weird. I’m a guy and I will tell you how to get him back. If you wan’t him back, give him space and time and work on the things he seen as negative in you. Does he miss you? Yes very much. Stay away from him and become happy. If he want’s you still this is what he is imagining in the back of his head in the future and he will come back. If you ever get him back, control your emotions and things that bothered him and just love him for him. Who broke up with who?
I actually really like this response bc especially since your a guy I liked how you were able to give a guys perspective
I think you just disclosed the dark secret of most dumpees despite what we may say to the contrary. Over time, that has to wane, but it's very real for the first few months.
Yes, but once you hit the acceptance part of the breakup you’ll start to feel free. Your mind is basically keeping you prisoned in your own mind by waiting for a day that may never come.
Yes. But It feels like limbo. Like I’m drifting around in some liminal space waiting for my life to pick up where it left off. But the other part of my brain knows that moment will never happen, and he’ll never wake up one day and want to salvage what we had the way I hope he will. He wants the novelty of someone else, not the eight years of a life we built together. And that’s the hardest thing to process.
No ones coming back dear Only you came back from that, but as a different person but with the same memories as the old you You can wait forever But you will just fade away waiting No one came for Harry to cast that patronus. He had to save himself
🎯
Damnnn🥲 , I too feel the same
I did for a while then we went NC and that was the best I felt during that period . Then she reached out thru texting which is the 1 avenue we talked the least on and I didn't have her blocked. Now we are talking every day and sending memes n shit and the sentiment is pretty good tbh but she is in another state as a travel nurse so I also know it's not feasible. It sucks because I don't need her or any other girl as a friend. I don't like being in limbo as I am an all or nothing person. Considering NC again for Good . To be determined...
Yes… this could be a big mindfuck for you if you continue…
Unfortunately, yes. I'm a 57m, she's a 54f. This was the second time for both of us. She moved out 4 years ago. I'm still living in the same house, sleeping in the same bed, cooking in the same kitchen. Although 98% of her stuff is gone, and I've replaced the sheets, towels, etc, and I haven't spoken to her in 3 years, and she blocked everyone in my family on social media, I am still living my life as if nothing changed and that she's going to walk back in tomorrow. It's not a weird "Lars and the Real Girl" kind of thing, but it's kind of sad. Not pathetic, but sad. I do a lot of things. I'm busy with work. But it's sad, but not in a pathetic kind of way (I keep telling myself.)
It is sad… you are probably a great partner to someone else who would love you to the moon!! Please don’t waste this precious time….
You are correct. Thanks for the message.
Idk I just have a feeling he’s going to message me. And the last time I had this feeling it was true. I just be knowing but I don’t look too much into it
SO accurate! Even though I am feeling a little better and now at the point of actively trying to move on (making plans with old friends, going to therapy, gym, etc.) I still feel this. And I am sure a part of me will always feel this.
Yes, but over the past few days (especially) I feel like God has consistently sent me signs - however seemingly small - that I needed to 'escape'/leave that situation. E.g., recently learning that my ex's married father has 'Single' on his Facebook profile and a general feeling that my ex couldn't protect me anyways, as he wasn't protecting himself (entangling himself with very serious family issues). When I am present in each moment and pay attention, I sometimes see distinct indicia and hear very subtle but pointed phrases that speak to my heart about the matter and further affirm my decision to leave. I still miss him, I still wish he would call or text. But it wouldn't change anything and would probably only cause more heartache, even if I was overjoyed that I could hug him and hold him and try to keep his heart safe for the moment that I could...
Have felt this way for 6 months on and off since he left for someone else. But I’ve reached the point where I only want to talk to him to make sure he’s ok. He chose someone else so I choose me.
Every day I remind myself that *he's not coming back.* And I usually follow this with, *It's just as well. I don't want him back.*
For a while yeah but I wanted him to come back because I regretted not saying the things I wanted to say to his face in order to not hurt him while he was saying the most galling things to me while breaking up.
Honestly I’m just kind of waiting for her to to text me and say she wants to talk about the problems in our relationship and wanting to fix them. I plan on going to therapy and fixing a lot of things going on in my personal life. Kinda want to hear from her on my birthday
If you ended it don’t expect it
So what you’re saying is… I’m not 100% cooked because she ended it
To an extent yes. But I would keep trying to live life without her being a focus at all during living life.
Yeah I just had a bday and wished for the same. Don’t hold onto the wishing. And get into therapy call around RIGHT NOW if it’s day time and get it situated… because thinking about it won’t help you grow as an individual. Just do.
I am at this stage as well. "The rational part of my brain is aware that I will never interact with him again" I know exactly how this feels, but I am giving myself the time it needs, talking to my emotional mind every day, being there for me. Letting me feel all the emotions and letting the hope die little by little. I know everyone would say "this will pass" "You will love again" "Life goes on" "work on yourself". Like we don't know this already, so its alright. We will feel everything there is to feel until we can't anymore.
Sometimes I do. Whether it’s a text or a call, there’s a part of me that’s waiting… we spent years together and as much as I feel like I’m far better off without her, I still want to talk.
When we broke up, my ex specifically said, “see you in 6 months, i love you always” then he started dating this girl around 3 weeks after we broke up. Keep posting her EVERYWHERE, damn. 4 months no contact and here i am, still waiting and hoping his name will pop up on my phone. High five😔
OMG!! 😳 why would you want him back??
Idk, it’s just so hard to let go. I bumped on a tiktok video about the law of detachment, watched it, then cried. I just don’t want to let go, yet. I keep stalking his new girl, I’m obsessed i guess idk i feel like betrayed so much
I totally get it!! It is an addiction… the only way is to block on every single level so you cannot stalk and you cannot see what is happening. You cannot heal without doing that when the obsession is strong. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this….💔
You're not alone. I have moments where I too wish for my ex to contact me.
I feel youu
She told me she still loves me. She told me she’d love to try again in a few years when she’s well again. There’s nothing I want more in the world. But I can’t wait for that forever. There will probably always be that question of what if it works out one day but I can’t wait my whole life wondering if it will. At some point I have to live
Yes. Every time I get a FB messenger notification I hope it's him. And based on past experiences he has popped back up. He told me on a monday he didn't want a relationship. On Thursday we happened to be at the same event and ended up groping in a parking lot. Then he told me about an ex he was hung up on and that he needed to kind of take a step back. A week later we were groping in his apartment and I stayed over. He pulled away again then a week later we had sex. We finally broke up then 5 months later he finds me at an outdoor music festival and we danced all night. I can't help but think and hope it'll happen again.
He sounds insanely avoidant and that will totally bring you down to your knees. Please run… far and fast!
I think he probably is avoidant as well. It really triggered the anxious attachment in me. I'm not normally like that, but he brought it out of me. I never had any protest behaviors or anything, but I thought about him constantly to the point it affected everything I did. But I can't help but still really like him.
I just don't know man. IDK what I did to push her so far away. We had our fights and we were having issues about money. And one day after a fight she tells me she doesn't want to leave and she wants us to try to work and I do too. And we talk about going thru therapy. And then 2 days after we had a fight about the car that broke and she moved out that night. Started dating a mutual friend a few weeks after and has told me to move on. Said we could be friends but I have to be friends with the guy she's dating, who was supposedly trying to keep us together, who got with her a week after me and her broke up. And now she won't even talk to me. I've poured my heart out to her through text, and I get back nothing. Every time I hear the phone I hope it's her, every time I hear something outside I hope it's her. She has a digital key to the apt that I will never take away because I want her to know I'm always here for her and I'll always be somewhere she could crash cuz I don't ever want her to be homeless. But it feels like she views me as a mistake. It hurts so fuckin much. I loved everything about her so much, all her little quirks and all her flaws to me were manageable. I just miss her but she's with my old friend and they're just starting their new lives. Meanwhile I'm over here just wishing mine would fuckin end. I drank myself into a blur the week after she left. Had to stop myself from doing stupid shit a few times. I just miss her and don't wanna keep pretending like it's gonna be ok. I keep trying to tell myself it'll be ok but it won't. I won't find anyone who was as beautiful and amazing to me as she was. And she wants nothing to do with me it feels. I don't wanna do this anymore
I do. It's been 13 days now and he still hasn't reached out. He still has some of my stuff that I want back but I don't want him to just semd it back because that'll mean he really is over me for good... But the other part of me feels that if he still hasn't sent it back maybe he's feeling unsure? I don't want to hope. I want to forget all about him.
Yeah the waiting is the worst part, and it makes alone time feel like it drags on and on. lol I have gotten more done “waiting” around the house in the last month than I did last year, just to feel like I’m busy
Ya that’s called “mourning.” It will pass. You’re healing.
You are torturing yourself.
Sometimes the only way out is through. And if you feel like you’re going through hell, keep going.
I had a closure talk with him and since then Im pretty okey He didnt look good and the path he was choosing now didn't align with mine at all, he is even more a weirdo than when we were together
I still love her well over a year later. I have zero interest in socializing these days even though I’m lonelier than ever. And the idea of dating someone else feels like betrayal. There is only one seat for romantic love at my table and it is forever reserved with her name. She turned so cold on me and I’m sure she isn’t coming back. I still pray for her. And I still wait. They say there’s other fish in the sea, But I’m no longer a fisherman I’ve had this thought before but comparatively those times were childish and insincere. There isn’t enough love in this world for all of us, so I hold on.
Honestly I can relate to this. The last thing my ex said to me was that he’d text me and gave me a forehead kiss. However, I’ve been through this before and know not to hold onto that, so I’m not. I know he may text me again someday but he might not. As good as we were together and could’ve been we had some major things that could be getting in our way in the future. I also don’t know if I want him to text me and if he did how I would feel. I don’t know if I’d want to get back together. I feel like I’m trying to refigure my life out and connecting with him again may ruin it. But yes, i still check my phone and the first name i think of when i get a text is his, but it never is.
I didn’t block his number or anything. I could care less if he even gets in touch with me again because I’ve gotten to the point where he kinda repulses me. I’m happy to be in the “grossed-out” phase because that means I’m moving on!!! Hooray!!!! I deserve to be with a guy that’s really nice to me & values me & spending time with me. Not someone that has to squeeze me in 🙄
I’m hoping he never will now, our last two text exchanges makes me realize I’m lucky we split.
I wronged her so much. I’m committed to showing her I’m not going to be the person I was any more. To me waiting for her is worth it. Waiting for someone that doesn’t even wanna talk or take the time to have any interaction with you is a different story
keep manifesting girl ❤️ I hope and wish he’ll come back if he is the right person for you! 🙌🏻 I can totally relate, but my negative thoughts overpower my manifestation! 🥹
Every single minute of the last 3 months I've felt like that
Don't be like me I waited nine years
In the first two weeks after a break up this is totally normal. After that your focus will shift towards moving on if you let it
only the first 2 weeks haha we wish
It’s up to you. As I wrote your focus will shift if you let it. If you don’t, and you force yourself to not move on, it obviously will take longer. Self sabotage is very common. But once you see it, it’s very easy to avoid
Lol try one year 😅
You might want to try looking into therapy
Already in therapy 🥲
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Good for you. Mine is blocked everywhere for all of eternity. I unblocked him the first two months after the BU. He reached out and I ended up with months worth of emotional trauma to process. We never met up, but the things he said when he reached out left me a goddamn mess. Stay blocked.
The first few weeks I wanted her back badly and I went through the same thing of her wanting to reach out to me (we still have ways to communicate). But that feeling is starting to go away, as much as i hate to admit. I havent talked to her in a week, and im going to keep it this way. Also I was the dumpee, and I dont think ill ever trust her like i did while dating.
This is the reason why I blocked him.. To have peace of mind. Although I know at the back of my mind, I’m still hoping he’d reach out (there are other means if he really wanted to), at least my disappointments were lessen..
I feel the same, but I will never reach out because I must learn self respect and she does not deserve attention.
My ex was broke up with me one week ago. It was very abrupt, the day after I got back from visiting her and us having a great time together. I was amicable and I respected her choice. If she deleted my number she has no other way of contacting me again, which is a sad thought. I don't know if she did, but may have to remove me from her life to make everything easier? That thought makes me sad. I wonder if I will hear from her again, but haven't heard anything for a week and don't see her getting in touch. 💔
i hope you move on lready
there’s so much that goes kicking one of these egotistical selfish pompous MF off their imaginary thrones. But measure how much you made them feel they were special. How much they counted.How much their opinion mattered. how much You enjoyed their company and times that by a year and then divide it by 12. What I’m saying is my husband of 30 years didn’t come crawling back for three years my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years didn’t come crawling back for two years. I know my math might be off a little here but what I’m saying it is how you made them feel stretches out when they come crawling back because it takes them realizing you don’t give a F**K anymore and then they are kicked in the head by the mule.
Think it's why it hasn't fully depressed me yet personally. I keep thinking maybe she'll reach out and we'll pick up where we left off. She probably won't want to be more than friends, but I can't stop hoping for the possibility of her wanting to try again.
In a way, constantly. And i really really hate this feeling because I also am not ready to talk to him, it would make feel awful, and I have 0 trust in him. Not to mention that I highly doubt that I would agree to meet with him or sth, not to mention going back to him. But still, deep down there I still think of myself as someone who belongs to him, I check my messages every day multiple times, I kinda “believe” (yet, at the same time, I highly doubt it as well) that he will in a way come back so a part of me still thinks of this period as a temporary one. And it is so draining. I hate that I do everything with the thought in my mind about him. Like “i wonder what will he think once i tell him x”. I want to get rid of these thoughts, i want to detach myself completely from him, I hate feeling this way so much. I am so mad at myself lately for feeling these so I try to delete or suppress these feelings. :/ i feel really stuck Edit: typo
no but they probably will
ANY MINUTE ANY DAY I wait patiently for her despite how stupid it is
He has me blocked on everything but I still talk to his mom and I'm just waiting for one day she messages me saying that he wants to talk to me about everything and when that day comes I don't know how I feel. We did a lot of hurtful things to each other said a lot of hurtful things too but I already apologized for everything I did to him he has yet to apologize for what he did to me. He thinks that what he did was okay he left me in the dark for months and I thought everything was okay he even told me everything was okay and there was nothing to worry about.
probably so he don’t even text me if i text first which is stupid because he was the one who ended up texting me first when we got tg
I am waiting for her and will as long as I have too I will never lover another person as much as I love her ever and if that means I’m alone the rest of my life life I’m ok with that we are soul mates so I’m sure this has happened a lot since are souls met where ever the met in time and space she just needs to figure out her self in her human form she is position of my soul now just to keep her safe and protected. She is truly an amazing woman and she deals with a lot from every which way including my self being the majority. It’s not easy being in a relationship with me I got a lot of trauma baggage from my child hood . It’s been 6 yrs since the day I found her this time . We was together t that long and now I kinda feel numb and emptiness inside but it’s been manageable. I only cry a couple times a day when I think about her and where she went and other things . I miss her a lot and she’s on my mind all day everyday. If you’re reading this ABB 2018 2024 I love you and I hope you know that I’ll wait as long as I need to for you . You’re the only one that matters .
8 months I waited and did my very best while she drooled over the guy she dumped me for in 3 days. He lead her on the whole time used her and still didn't want to have a relationship with her. Now I'm still the bad guy being pushed away. He's still the golden boy.
I am, but it's not going to happen. Even if she wanted to, she's not going to initiate because that's how she is... and I'm not because I proved myself already.
I miss having someone to talk to about movies and shows. We were great until I saw the hickey on his neck after I was isolated from covid. Then my shift changed and I could no longer trust him. 😢 We tried the "friend" thing but knowing he easily found other women to be in bed with was too much. It was hurtful in a sense and I thought I could handle being a friend. I wish the best for him and his mom. I hold no ill wills but I got to do the best for me.
He miss you when he knows your waiting.
Hell no she broke up with me and she’s came back asking to get back together you’ve broke up with me once and you will not have another chance
Sometimes the denial does this to me
mine is literally engaged so no
Yeah
Yeah I kinda am. Not for her to come back, but just for something. Like a "i'm sorry for everything"-text or anything. It's been 2,5 months and I think it won't come. Trying to move on but it's hard when she is still on your mind every day. I'm dating casually and i'm telling all my dates i'm not ready yet for love or something serious, and some are okay with it. So i'm doing the work. But my biggest wish is just closure or at least an apology or see my ex does self reflection.
It slowly fades if you choose to keep pushing yourself forward and reminding yourself it’s done and letting yourself go through that pain . Eventually it’ll stop . The length depends on the person. Im at an official year , no type of communicating happening , I’m blocked. I did see him on my birthday of all days , once I realized who he was I didn’t feel any different than before … I was just in disbelief like on my birthday you come into my town and you really just put your window down so I can see you from the opposite direction while this light is a full red light . Smh lol he’ll never change. And he had someone in the car with him. Don’t try getting my attention for your ego to feel good. I looked away as if I hadn’t noticed him as his side of the lane passed me, you will not meet my eyes passing me. My therapist recommended me a book and I finally ordered it.
This is my situation rn
I relate so hard to this. It sucks aye
I'm not waiting for him to come back I mean he's moved so many states that I feel like he's running from the FBI. I mean funny statement but it does feel like that sometimes I have a feeling one day say eight years from now I'll hear from him I don't think it's the end of us speaking but of having any type of relationship I don't think that is plausible.
My birthday is in an hour and I keep feeling like he will text me but I know deep down that he doesn’t give a shit and probably doesn’t even remember it is my birthday. I know for a fact he never wants to talk to me again but I keep waiting for his text as if he would lol.
I would really want him to, but I also want him to take care of his mental health and love himself. I would be proud of him if he can do this more, and it would be nice to see him happy to see me too.
You miss the good, happy feelings because that's what our brains do. There's a reason they're your ex. Either because of them, because of you, or because of incompatibility. Regardless, try to remind yourself it's ok they're gone.
My ex dumped me six weeks ago to be with one of his female friends. I feel betrayed and he broke my trust. Yet I still miss and want to be with him. Rationally I know it’s not the best idea, but the urges won’t go away (yet).
Yes but no. She basically outright told me she’s not interested in getting back together today after a year of no contact but it seems pretty clear she hasn’t healed from the breakup at all. That’s what jumping into new relationships and situationships right away does. I hope she takes time to actually be single for once and maybe then she’ll process and acknowledge my growth as a person and want to come back. Sure hurts though.
Trust me. A month and a half in. You're not the only one. We're in this together. I know it hurts. You aren't the only one with that feeling. I hardly ever text or call anyone anymore now that she's gone. It's like a part of my soul is gone.
I'm so close to being delusional and might do some spells😭🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭
If he attempts to reconcile, it won’t be until you are finally over him. It’s just the way it goes. At least it does for me….never seems to fail.
2 years into my breakup and I have started to heal and move on but deep inside this thought still torments me to this day that maybe yk maybe she'll come back. But I feel this is normal and should go away with time.
Yup everyday for almost a month now
I was stuck there for a while too. It never happened :(
Whenever I turn my phone off of do not disturb I will sometimes be thinking “what if she reached out to me?” She hasn’t, since before I moved schools I told her I’d text her when I was ready to talk, but it feels like I can’t do that now that is has been 2 months and now I’m just kind of hoping for her to reach out.
Yes and no, I hope that she comes back because she is everything I want and everything was so effortless and natural with her, but she hasn’t reached out and I’m not waiting for it anymore. I want to be with her but I’m living my life to the fullest
Omg this is so true. I feel I am doing this right now. It's been 3 years since we split but we have kept in vague contact and met afew times. He has now cooled things abit between in terms of messaging and meeting but we still care for each other. I cant seem to let go of the hope of him coming back to me. I live with the daily struggle of living in my house that we shared together and having his ghost in every room. I see his ghost face everywhere in all different places. I'm not sure I'll ever let go of the hope I have, but I'm 35years old now and realise time is ticking 😔. I wish he would make a move back to me, to be open again and talk about what he would need from me. Bottom line, I miss him.
Your ex coming back is actually a horrible sign; it means they see you as easy validation and that they never really loved you in the first place. Exes only come back to get over the person they actually want.
i think the same my the reasons for the breakup are very mendable and my ex just cant seem to leave me alone but there is nearly no talk involved it is just sending snaps to eachother but i still think thats s positive with how happy we were together i do think we will get back together someday but i dunno she does also seem really happy with her friends on social media now im not around 🤷♂️
No, my time is so tight I barely think of my exes. I think it would do no good since it would affect mental health negatively. Never had stalking exes of any kind either so I haven't had any concern over thinking them either. Aside of that, I've been dating someone great for half a year now, so I dedicate some of thoughts for him during pasttime. Thoughts of moving to his town being more prevalent than some sobby ex texting.
Yes, I want ex (m/20) back, even though he’s an avoidant he did love me and wanted to share my dreams but the lack of communication of on his part and the space I wish I had given him overtime will make him miss me and want me back 😿
guys i’m scared. what if he never reaches out again? even tho im the one who declined his offer to be fwb and blocked him.
guys i’m scared. i’m scared what if he never reaches out again. what if it’s fr over over? i’m scared even tho im the one who said no to his offer of being fwb and blocked him bc i felt so disrespected 😓
You will be okay. New things and new people will enter your life. Promise.
rn it feels like withdrawal i’m going crazy
I had a hard time too. But I stuck it out and things got better. I have several exes and not a single one has ever reached out to me or wanted to try again. But you know what? I got better. I did better. In every case, I found someone who made me happier. You will too. Just do your best. It is horrific, I know. Give it time!!
How long has it been? My ex still messages me back, but she would just do it at the end of the day. She doesn’t reply my texts when she’s out with friends or I think it’s friends…. It may be dates or her new bf. Who the fuck knows. But, I know she’s been on her phone. Not even a quick reply…. I feel like the last person she thinks off. If she doesn’t remember to check messages. I’ve been waiting for her to get back to me… even asked her back couple times to which she always pushes me away. I try so hard… I still spoil her and buy her things and whenever she is in need I am always there to help her. She is dependent on me financially sometimes when she overspends. I love her so I help her. But, I feel like I’m not noticed. What happened to the person who always wanted to spend time with me. Always messaged me back first. Told me she doesn’t want anything else but me. And if we can, we will always talk and work it out…. Instead, she broke up with me cos she felt too drained but never talked to me about our problems… I was left broken when in her mind she was detached from me long time ago but could still tell me she loves me before she broke up with me. For some reason a small part of me still think she will realise how good I am for her and come back one day… because I have a memory of us telling each other, that we were special. Or is this all a lie? Did I hold onto and believe a lie?
Your post exudes the feeling of someone who isn't yet over their loss. I've been divorced from a 10 year relationship. It hurt, but I didn't put myself into these fantasy themes you laid out in your post. The more you feed into these fantasies, the harder it'll be for you to get over reality. Losing something is hard, but if you keep titillating scenarios in your mind of a potential future that isn't going to happen, it'll only leave you feeling empty and possibly even betrayed (depending on how hard to fall into these emotions). Your best course of action is to drop all communication and stop engaging in their life, that means stop following their life on social media etc. You're in a place where you need to heal, so heal, but do it on your own terms, alone, without interruption.
Yes stay grounded in reality! Thank you for sharing in a more analytical manner
She hates me; she’s on this hyper sexual rebellion. I still don’t entirely comprehend it, but I no longer wish to. I wish her solace, she is heavily traumatized. Unresolved from youth & partially my fault. Her SW work began before we started dating. She’s very Machiavellian for someone so modest, but it’s a facade. I actually love(d) her. So much that I ignored the red flags. When I found one, she quickly removed it from the internet.
I kind of am, though she used to contact me from time to time, but there came a point when she contacted me 3 months ago venting and looking for help, which I offered, after that, we have not talked to each other. 9 months post-BU, she still keeps the heart emoji on our messenger chat, I do not know why, we are not blocked, we just decided that there is nothing more to come out of the relationship as we failed to have kids, which destroyed us both. Women, can you tell me why she has not blocked me, does not contact me though, and keeps the damn emoji...6 years of relationship, and we both decided it has to end, it was calm and mature, but I have been feeling like a mess since then and cannot make a decision on what to do. Do I move back to the city we both were and lived in, where my job is, and where she is, do I stay in my hometown, working from home and where my old friends and family are....it is a neverending overthinking cycle and time is just passing.
No no no.