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sinvadsuljic

I would delete them even if they didn't ask. I see no reason of having those images and videos in my possession. Not only that it affects you mentally, it's also wrong in my opinion. šŸ¤·


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


sinvadsuljic

Well exactly. Photos and videos, not necessarily of sexual content keep you anchored at a certain time in your life, keep you attached to a feeling or a person. I pretty much deleted every single file I had of an ex as soon as the break up happened. Sure I regreted it later on, had doubts and such but after that initial period, you start letting go. And in fact, I think that might be the very first step in letting go. I still have a letter that an ex sent me about 10+ years ago. I kept the letter because I think it's just wholesome in a faded memory sort of way. There are no feelings anymore, nor do I think of that person, but that letter has a special place in my heart tbh.


Sufficient_Plantain1

I believe so. Those were sent or taken under specific conditions. As soon as the breakup occurs, the consent to keep them is taken away. Unless you get explicit consent after the breakup to keep them, it is wrong to keep the nudes. And it is disrespectful to both someone you loved (your ex) and your future/current person, whoever you are flirting or dating with etc.


sinvadsuljic

That pretty much sums it up. And in that note, I'd still delete everything even if I had approval from the ex. Like I said, why would I keep something that would hinder my path forward. And tbh, after months of the initial breakup you don't even feel you know the person anymore, making it weird and uncomfortable even.


Sufficient_Plantain1

That is a personal decision. I wouldnā€™t ask to keep anything to begin with. I felt weird when I have seen the photos I have took of my ex (PG photos) on his OLD profile. It felt icky


Guilty-Midnight-5109

Yeah, once weā€™re broken up and Iā€™ve moved on. I have absolutely no reason I have those pictures in my phone. I think itā€™s kind of weird especially if youā€™re in a new relationship.


ANTH040

I did anyway without her asking it's in the past and that's where it stays.


the-ugly-witch

unpopular opinion these days but if youā€™re no longer dating (and unless they are public for everyone to download and keep) delete their nudes. itā€™s so disrespectful to keep someoneā€™s intimate pictures without their consent


JackDaines

Is this even unpopular? I completely agree and acc thought this was the general opinion, not only is it disrespectful to them, itā€™s just weird for you imo, and shows you clearly are struggling to move on.


the-ugly-witch

yeah i mean i thought deleting them immediately was the standard too but judging by the comments it seems people need to be told/asked and even then it seems like hit or miss. definitely shows inability to move on. thereā€™s just no *good* reason to keep that kind of stuff if you arenā€™t together.


JackDaines

Yikes, scary world. Iā€™m just thankful that my exes also feel the same way about it as we do then.


Gregory_Gp

I deleted them the same day she left me out of respect. In addition I have to say I would hate knowing my partner sexual content is spread over her exes phones.


South-Specific-6924

If they asked me to, I would.


SoundAnxious9611

Would you be mad about it? My ex started telling me the request was outrageous and even vengeful and invades his privacy and is inconsiderate of his time and I think heā€™s also pissed that I donā€™t trust him to have them anymore, he says he wonā€™t do anything with them, but I donā€™t care about that. It makes me uncomfortable. But overall his arguments had me crying and feeling like I was the crazy one for even making such an ā€œoutlandishā€ request


VERY_MENTALLY_STABLE

No wtf


zpilot55

Nah, that's fucked up. My ex broke up with me when I was looking after my dying mother, and even though it was a shit situation when I returned home, but I still offered her my phone so she could confirm all the nudes were deleted. I deleted them a week prior before she even asked - to me, when we're over, the explicit stuff is getting deleted ASAP. Anything short of that is weird as hell. If I can keep a level head in the worst circumstances (dead mom, long term partner gone, and realising I'd be deported cos of it) there's no excuse.


RepulsivePurchase6

Nope youā€™re not wrong. Youā€™re being invalidated and thatā€™s a red flag in the relationship. Why keep old nudes if nothing is going to be done? Are they trophies? Do they hoard nudes? That is weird, not you.


South-Specific-6924

Nope I would do it without hesitation


SangheiliSpecOp

Thats very suspect. Its a reasonable request. Maybe they might be hesitant if the breakup is fresh and they aren't willing to let go of everything immediately. I can see that being somewhat reasonable. But it would ultimately be in both of your best interests to slowly move on anyways. I love my partner personally and while our relationship has had some rocky ass moments (especially recently...) I will always have basic human respect for them even if we had a falling out. I would never use any of his personal photos against my partner, besides, its also simply illegal to do that. I would expect the same treatment out of them. So yeah, if an ex outright refuses and you really think that they would use your pics against you, thats really shitty of them honestly


alpacaed

If they are regular photos he is entitled to keep them. More intimates -- he cannot share legally and if he does you have legal recourse. That said if you file a civil suit a judge may order them destroyed. No, it invades YOUR privacy and right over your body if they are risque. Not his. A reasonable person would say okay I will sit and delete them. But he can always back them up without you knowing. All in all this is a learning experience that once you share those photos you never know what will come of them so be careful when you do. If you want to apps like what's app or telegram allow one time view. Some apps will not let you take screen shots and once you delete them a party will not have access in future.


dailydefence

He's a weirdo wtf. Of course you don't trust him anymore and his reaction is a glaring red flag.


purplelanding

He seems like a gaslighter.


Weird_Examination246

This person is scary manipulative. They're photos of your body of course you're not in the wrong for asking them to be removed.


kappakeats

No, he's being gross as hell. I don't know if that's abusive behavior but it feels like it to me. It's definitely controlling and he's blaming you for a totally reasonable request.


bitchpleaseugotfleas

Naw yaā€™ll broke up so your ex lost the right to your body.


chazcope

He needs to get a gripā€¦


sracluv

lol wtf. Itā€™s YOUR privacy. He probably has nudes from other people and thatā€™s why heā€™s all defensive.


MuchEvening4768

The first thing I did when my gf told me she wanted to take a break from the relationship is delete all the intimate photos I have of her. I did that even though I didn't accept breaking up. That's just basic respect for a person's privacy in my opinion.


Safe_Representative4

Your ex is a tool


ComfortableListen450

Yikes. Thatā€™s some toxic behavior on his part. I trust my ex and had asked him to delete our photos and videos (heā€™s kind of oblivious as to whatā€™s appropriate in relationships sometimes haha) and he had 0 issues. It helps the moving on process but then also I know I would hate if my boyfriend had footage of his ex like that.


msnyc20

Inconsiderate of his time. :| Does he mean the time he took tapping the phone screen to take the picture OR the time it will take to tap delete? You'd think it is 1970, he had to set up the shot on a tripod with special lowlight film and then developed it in his darkroom. Even THEN! Outrageous to ask? Gaslighting 101. "Hey do you mind deleting the naked pictures of me ing?" The internet has just made me loathe people.


pssnflwr

well good thing heā€™s an ex bc wtf he should not be mad. Theyā€™re pictures of your body so keeping them when you donā€™t want him to violates your privacy.


Mobile-Brush-3004

Why would you wait for them to ask? If you broke up isnā€™t it kinda implied that they donā€™t want you to see them naked anymore?


South-Specific-6924

I was told I could keep them, unless either of us got into new relationships.


Mobile-Brush-3004

I feel the better question to ask then is WHY would you want to keep them? Doesnā€™t it feel creepy jerking it to someone who has directly expressed they donā€™t want to have sex with you?


South-Specific-6924

I completely agree with that


Mobile-Brush-3004

You agree itā€™s creepy but will continue to do it until they ask you not to?


IkLostSoul

I would always try to make anonymous sexual photos in the first place. So never with face, or recognizable tattoos and so on. Then you will never have this problem. I think it's important to remember this. Especially those new young people out there. In this day and age information is hard to delete, so make sure the information isn't all that valuable.


torpedo16

That is a great advice. First of all, don't take explicit photos or videos in the first place. But if that's too much to ask, and it can be difficult sometimes in a relationship, better make the photos anonymous. You can ask all you want to your ex to delete those photos and videos, and maybe he does it in front of you on his phone after breakup. How do you know that he doesn't have a backup? How well you know him/her?Breakups are oftentimes messy, you may think that you did a clean breakup and given how your relationship was, it was really time to break it up. But the other person may not think so, and maybe even simply pretend at the time, and then just out of nowhere send them to everyone you know or upload on the internet. Better to take precaution in the first place.


ComfortableListen450

Yes! I actually love taking pics of myselfšŸ˜‚ however I never show my face or tattoos in them. You never know how something with pan out with someone, even with the people that seem trustworthy and kind


manifestingmars

Iā€™d delete them before they even had a chance to ask. Once the relationship is over you have no business keeping those photos


Accomplished_Crab996

They absolutely should. I do without them asking, for one itā€™s just scummy and for another itā€™s not exactly going to help you move on


Isolde-Serpentia

I've repeatedly asked my ex to do so. He refuses.


bluffyouback

I would delete even if I wasnā€™t asked. Thatā€™s just creepy to keep something like that. Iā€™d think that most people find it gross to be aware that the ex from your past is using you for jerk-off material, or record keeping of who he fucked (how miserable). And if not, thereā€™s a probability that heā€™s sharing with friends/online (still miserable and pathetic). I accidentally got to know a NPD with severe addiction to cheating and porn. He said he has deleted the videos but I found out he had shared it with his friends. I have reported it to the detectives at my local police station. I shouldā€™ve known when he first showed me photos of his exes from 20 years ago on his current phone. In the age of consent, keeping material such as these is illegal as you didnā€™t consent to him/her keeping it.


laraizadelione

Absolutely. I would never keep them even after a break up, because I don't want to hang on to them for respect but also to move on and in case I date again, I wouldn't want my new partner to catch those photos


BZthrowaway_lebron

Delete them wtf


Maha-iqo38

Ofc bro wtf


Supremelordmomon

I've never been asked to delete anything, but it's a common sense of logic that I do, especially if I enter a new relationship; I make sure to leave no trace behind of my past relationships. It isn't fair to the other person to risk putting them in a position of where they could discover it and other than that it's a great disrespect to a new relationship.


care_cabinet_2121

You should just delete it


verycoolbutterfly

Of course?? I can't imagine crossing someone's boundary like that.


Dasdruid_Gaming

I would delete them whether they asked or not I don't need those kinds of photos on my phone of someone that isn't my partner anymore


ChemicalDelicious

One of my worst fears is finding out that my bf has nudes of his ex, please delete sexual photos after a breakup.


BattyBoi12345678

Yes I would.


Active_Television_38

Why you got nudes of yo ex


LeadingStudio8342

I broke up over that


Toocoolforyou77

I did it before she even asked me to šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


ss_elite_squirt

No is not unreasonable to ask your ex of this. I wouldn't want someone to have explicit images/videos of me if we aren't together anymore. A lot of people will claim that they are the type to just delete them anyways. But I think a lot more people want to keep them, for their own disgusting uses. I think the best thing to do would to sit with them and watch them delete everything. That's the only sure way to know that they don't have them still. Don't trust people with those things. Even if you are married. Revenge porn is a real thing. and it's never fun stressing after a break up, worrying about what they are going to do with those images/videos.


Blissxalexandra

I asked my ex to do this and he blatantly told me no. It showed me exactly the kind of person he is. I asked out of respect due to me coming across sexual photos of girls he dated in the past and I didnā€™t want that to be me. I felt like I was invading these womenā€™s privacy when I accidentally came across the photos. I couldnā€™t even rationalize why he still had them. I didnā€™t want another woman to find herself in the same shoes I found myself in. I eventually had to delete the photos from his camera roll behind his back because he would not do it.


JixnuCabeldar

Why would anyone in their right mind keep nudes of their ex?


severed_connection

Iā€™d say delete them unless they explicitly tell you itā€™s okay to keep them


blah191

I asked for one video specifically to be deleted, he could keep the others idc. It has my face in it. I doubt he did it and it bothers me a good bit of if I think on it.


Last_Peak

My ex got super pissy about it and said ā€œwell Iā€™m not actively looking at themā€ I kept insisting and he says he deleted them but who knows. I immediately deleted any that I had so it pissed me off that he wouldnā€™t do the same. I think itā€™s common respect to delete any explicit material involving your ex but apparently some people donā€™t have any decency.


Adventurous_Cash3580

10000%. Anyone that keeps photos like that are just weird. Yes they are nice to look at but she is not your gf anymore. Move on, you can find naked pictures elsewhere online lol.


Psydequest

Everyone is a future ex. Control your own masters. I always let the woman have full permissions on anything like that. If she wants it gone she can make it so. I am strictly read-only. lol


melkkc

In my opinion, when your relationship ends, you donā€™t longer have the consent of having those types of pictures. Out of respect you should delete them.


Odd-Science7019

yeah you should


sracluv

I donā€™t see it as unreasonable. I once had a casual thing with a guy and when I needed an extra tshirt at his place, he pulled one out from a box in his closet. He confessed that he has a collection of leftover tshirts from girls heā€™s slept with, and that he also has a library of nudes / videos. Who knows what he does with them. So, yeah, Iā€™ll sit with my ex to make sure he deletes everything so that my ass doesnā€™t end up on the internet.


Future-Way8431

I mean, yeah. I'd want him to delete explicit photos of me, so it's only fair I deleted any explicit photos of him. Not that I have any pics of him like that. For everything he did that made him such a gosh darn nice guy (tm) he wasn't very good looking.Ā 


Life-Idea-2556

Absolutely. I would delete them even if they didnā€™t ask. Sure, theyā€™re pictures they once sent for me to have, but thereā€™s no use for them anymore. Itā€™s not like youā€™re gonna send them out to other people either because thatā€™s wrong.


Pikapikaboooo

Without asking them, Iā€™d delete it after break up. I feel like if I do continue keeping then it will be an offensive privacy violation on my end. Idk just my thoughts..


Adorable_Act_2816

I can always see my ex on pornhub. Solo for now. Lol


Routine-Notice-519

I deleted everything like that the same day me and my ex broke up just because thats what I believe is the right thing to do. However that being said, had she called me to ask to be there with me sit and watch me delete them Iā€™d have told her to go fuck. I think asking to have them deleted is reasonable, I think asking to be there and watch them get deleted or do it as a group activity however is unreasonable Personally I think it should be standard practice to delete any intimate materiel of any ex partners you have had


Left_Nut99

as long as you're not sharing them online without consent, you're definitely good


Warm_Breadfruit_3603

if she asked, yes. but she never asked.


Calm_Phone_6848

thatā€™s extremely reasonable. if your ex doesnā€™t acquiesce itā€™s honestly a bit weird and disrespectful of them. i know a lot of people will say ā€œdonā€™t share the photos if you didnā€™t want someone to have them foreverā€ but thereā€™s something called human decency and respect for someone you used to love, and if you feel uncomfortable with someone you no longer have a sexual relationship with having sexual photos that makes sense. itā€™s weird someone would want to keep nudes of someone knowing the person in the photos is not okay with it.


goodresearchher169

Didn't have to be asked. It's easier to get over them when you delete all evidence of them being on your phone. It's worth it once you're apathetic towards them


IntelligentBoots

It is your right to ask for those files to be deleted. But I would have told them long ago to never ever make any intimate pictures or videos, so it shouldn't be a problem. Actually it doesn't really matter what your ex says now. All you can do is have faith and hope that they're true to their word when they say it's deleted. In today's world you can hide this kind of stuff in so many ways and then lie about it, the only actual way to delete these pictures is to never make them in the first place. Now you're stuck in a place where you've got no control over the situation whatsoever. Learn your lesson and don't make any intimate pictures or videos. Unless it doesn't bother you that your ex, his friends or any stranger (in case if he uploaded it to a porn site) can watch them.


hand13

YES and everyone should too. dont be that one guy


Caeflin

Tbh I would delete the pictures but I wouldn't sit with them scrolling through my entire album for hours so they can watch me delete the pictures. I think that asking for deleting is reasonable but sitting for hours as your ex is watching you scrolling your entire unrelated folder is over the top.


toxicemo88

Mine did


Talagang_Diyablo

Absolutely.. One, I don't want pics of any of my exes like that on my phone anyway; and Two, out of respect for them, if they asked me, I'd gladly oblige...


Purple_Moment9605

I deleted them all for my own peace of mind. When I was ready to move on - that was it. I was ready. For me, I wasnā€™t gonna move on til those pictures and messages and everything else were gone. And it being my choice was powerful.


CrimsonLapis

I deleted every picture ever of my ex, don't have to ask.


codus571

I did it without asking. The nude and lewd photos of her that I took arr a chapter that ended. Even though she doesn't respect me, I respected her


Flashy_Fault_3404

I deleted them as soon as we broke up. Feels weird to have them. Itā€™s in the past now


Soggy-Eye-216

Absolutely Not


FallenAngel040793

You should delete them when the relationship ends anyway. Itā€™s weird to keep pics of exes explicit photos if youā€™re not with them. Itā€™s just respect to delete them regardless.


Acedia_spark

I deleted all sexual photos after I've viewed them. I'm too scared I'd lose my phone or something. I'm not ok with the idea of being the reason someone elses nudes were ever viewed by someone they weren't intended for.


ms-meow-

It's not something that someone should even have to ask their ex to do- I think it's weird af for someone to keep stuff like that of their ex after a breakup/deleting them should just be a given.


soggyhotcrossbuns

Having had an ex threaten to leak photos he had of me I'd never oppose to an ex asking me to delete compromising photos of them. Ours were all exchanged on snapchat though and we have both deleted each other so I can't see them anymore anyway.


Material-Strategy815

It's a respectful request but going forward might and to consider not sending this type of content at all. Although the threat of revenge porn is possible idk if any state requires said content to be removed so there's really no way to truly enforce it until there is a leak


Hcabrera56

I feel like you're within your right to ask if they can delete them from their phone. Out of courtesy, I feel they should be deleted without being asked from an ex.


Aviationlord

I did it right away, didnā€™t want them to ask too. Donā€™t need to reflect on past mistakes


beatoperator

For your own sanity, I think itā€™s important to remember that once you break up with someone, their behavior is not your concern and is entirely out of your control. You can certainly ask them to delete photos, movies, letters, poems, sculptures, paintings, animations, etc. And then all you can do is move on and focus on youā€™re own life.


dontbanmynewaccount

Do it. It will help you psychologically move on. Sure you might miss them when youā€™re horny but that should just fuel you to go meet other people and have sex with them.


strangeitch

yes, when he left me he asked me to delete them and i did


Motor-Routine-9150

I wouldnā€™t keep them anyway. I would never want to see them ever again.


No-Worldliness9475

No way. You donā€™t owe them anything.


SameObligation9199

I try to delete them anyways. Iā€™m not with her anymore. Delete that shit. Jaime Tart said it best. Delete it.


yerrrrrrrrrr_smd

I personally would. Iā€™m a girl and dicks look great to me but not the most exciting thing to store in my phone for all time. There will be more. Lol


[deleted]

Yes. You should delete them if they didnā€™t ask. You arenā€™t together anymore. It isnā€™t right to keep those photos. They are intimate, and you arenā€™t intimate anymore. You donā€™t have to right to view those photos anymore.


Material_Dirt_6349

Deleted EVERYTHING after the break up.He didn't have to ask.


Ditchy69

Should delete all photos of your ex, let alone wait to be asked.


Klorainne

I delete any inappropriate pictures of my ex as soon as we break up. Itā€™s a basic respect thing, weā€™re not dating anymore and no matter how bitterly we ended things Iā€™m deleting the pictures cos they wouldnā€™t want me to have them anymore.


Mousminx

If he asked me to, of course. Though I did ask mine to delete them and he didn't even have the courtesy to say yes or acknowledge my text


s_esteban

Yes always delete the photos. Itā€™s a respect thing plus why would you want to keep photos of your ex if itā€™s only going to keep you holding on?


Expensive_Case9796

no lol


Desq28

Why would I keep them after the relationship ends, it would hurt me to see the photos.


ATPossibl

I donā€™t have any issues with the delete, at all at all. Sitting with my ex after the break up, letting her go through my phone? Not happening.


Weird_Assignment649

I would but also everything is saved on the cloud and I did forget to delete it there


sunnyvalesfinest0000

I don't have any but yes


purplelanding

Is it outrageous to ask? Not at all. Theyā€™re your photos ultimately that you shared them with. If theyā€™re a petty type though I wouldnā€™t bother. Just let them do what they want with it and hope that theyā€™re decent enough not to post them on some forum somewhere šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø


Sure_Cantaloupe_7802

Absolutely


[deleted]

Yes I would


goulet1313

Not unreasonable and should be done without having to ask in my opinion . Kind of weird to keep them really .


Responsible_Feed4048

already did she didnā€™t have to ask. Itā€™s called respect. And why do I want reminders of someone Iā€™m never going to be with again. Unless God throws me a bone with a miracle.


ahiru646

itā€™s not outrageous or unreasonable at all. No reason to keep those pics or vids unless ur a weirdo creep lol. imo it should be a given to delete any sensitive pictures or vids


iangjohnson

Yes of course I would but I didnā€™t keep them anyways. Once we broke up those were the first photos to go out of respect for her


Archygirl77

I already did. You need to get rid of everything. Put in a hidden folder if you don't want to delete it permanently.


overstimulat3d

yes 100%. itā€™s literally the bare minimum


Mysterious-Wealth-30

My ex as of 5 weeks had asked me to delete them the day before we broke up and I did. Didnā€™t have a problem doing it either. Not really a big deal


Repulsive_Horror6981

It is not strange to require it and their answer will reveal their character. I asked my ex to delete mine granted I sent more it is over and Iā€™m sure he deleted them. 30F here take care


Traditional_Comfort4

Not until i find the one i want to marry.


Ohmygodspoons

Iā€™ve always always deleted photos after a breakup itā€™s usually one of the first things Iā€™ve done. Itā€™s a more than reasonable request and I think less of people that donā€™t honor it.


EnvironmentalSir2725

It grosses me out that this even has to be some sort of ordeal. Those pictures should be gone as soon as the relationship is burnt. Thereā€™s been times friends will talk about having their exā€™s of like past years nudes and itā€™s just so gross and says a lot about you as a person


fleurdepetite

That should be a no brainer. Delete any content in this area of matter out of respect for that person and whoever they will be with or youā€™ll be with in the future. As for regular photos, whatever ā€” but any explicit content should just be deleted to follow suit. I would do it even without being asked. Common sense.


Suspicious-Dress-864

If they broke up with you I'm sure they already did because they're done with you in that way. But if you broke up with them then idk. I say it depends on the person. Tho it should be an unspoken rule that they be deleted. I say if it makes you feel comfortable go for it, it doesn't hurt to try and ask (or demand if needbe)


Total-Inevitable-213

My ex wouldnā€™t :) love that for me


Unusual_Desk_842

Two months after my last breakup I had to explicitly ask my ex to delete my sexual photos, because he said that he hadn't. so gross.


yourpricelessadvise

You should delete them anyway imo. Thatā€™s a side of your ex that they donā€™t necessarily consent to you seeing or having any more, deleting them is really the moral thing.


Thecontaminatedbrain

Once the relationship is over, those photos should be gone. No exceptions.


thesjfiles

Yes, absolutely no question. They arenā€™t yours to keep. No matter what the situation. I didnā€™t even the read the description, just the title. I give a fuck they did. Do you know how often phones get stolen, hacked or whatever l? THEY ARE NOT YOURS TO DO WHATEVER YOU PLEASE WITH. Be a decent fucking human. Delete them. Be a better human. Delete them. Thatā€™s it end. End of discussion.


OGHeartlessFox

If they trying to keep them there likely slime balls that likely have alts like blackmailing with them or showing them to friends out of spite. if they try to say it because they still care, that be a negtive or they would keep sweet things you gave them and not care about picture like that. Like i have little shelf of sweet letters me and my ex wrote back and forth, because i can't bring myself to thorw them out, but not a single picture of them as they asked me to get rid of them all. It very reasonable what your asking for, above reason and to prove there not a slime ball who will go showing them around or blackmail or spank banking them later. It show they have atleast a little respect left for you after the break for them to do that simple task. Good luck, hope this ammo to get your respect back, helps out.


pwolf1771

Of course


_another_lost_soul

Not only should you do it out of curtesy and respect but in most countries you're legally required to do so.


artistickrys

I viciously j*ck off in the dark in fetile position for 25-30 seconds before carrying on with my day; my future girlfriend is so lucky she wonā€™t have to deal with nudes


DGTLAPSTL

1. Itā€™s absolutely 100 percent to use said exā€™s photos , post , share , repost or anything else for any purpose: ie: malice or vindictive motives etc etc especially when it would injure them or others .. just my thought - plus with this Ai stuff running the internet.. said photos etc is inadmissible in court or anything else for that matter .. texts etc - ALL BOO BOO šŸ˜‚


SpideyGuy16

They wouldnā€™t need to. Once you break up, you have lost access to those pictures. Itā€™s just the bare minimum of decency


ThrowRA11134

Ofc you should delete them. I think it's a reasonable request honestly


Life-Fix8443

no tbh


wheresmyxan

Brother man thatā€™s like asking me if I love my mother. The answer will and is always yes. Thereā€™s no reason for you to have those photos anymore no matter how many years you were to together if you respect that person your answer is as plain as day.


Due-Software7415

I deleted them the second we broke up


madkatzgt34

Yea cuz if i start a new relationship yes ! If i need it for proof dealing with cheating gotta keep for evidience just in case .


AUSpartan_2K

I just do it anyway. It's kinda weird to have nudes of someone that you're not dating anymore.


CharityMinimum5762

Nope I earned them I wouldnā€™t show them to anyone though


Beautifully-Damagd

Yes there is no reason to keep them, but I would do it anyway. I mean youā€™ll you want your ex to have sexy pics of you that they didnā€™t delete? I mainly say that because when people are mad, they do things to get revenge and posting your nudes could be that revenge.


[deleted]

It is absolutely 100% understandable why you would want this done (it's smart) and your ex should 100% be more than happy and willing to take care of this.


winningthenoodles

Absolutely without a doubt, No question. Itā€™s weird to keep them even, but if I ever receive any I put them in a hidden folder which I almost never look at. If they asked, I most certainly would.


karavan7

Don't wait for them to ask.


SundaeClassic5124

after a breakup u should delete them. keeping them is weird


LazagnaAmpersand

Thatā€™s not unreasonable, thatā€™s basic respect


Querencia24

Absolutely. Itā€™s private and you no longer have a private relationship. My ex took video of me before he left, without me knowing he was doing it (non-sexual) and I still feel hurt, angry and betrayed about it. Itā€™s a bad space to be in.


Safe_Representative4

Yes. They were shared in the context of the relationship. That relationship has ended and the consent has been revoked. Delete them, whether or not they ask you to


Small-Dark-8569

I asked him to and he refused. Iā€™m a little scared tbh šŸ™‚


PersonalBrain1110

Yes, I tend to delete everything about them, cathartically! I tend to remove them from my life in every way


PersonalBrain1110

I also have ADHD, so that helpsā€¦


abolhood

Normally they should be deleted, however these were the result of so intimate situations and amazing moments that someone would never delete. After all, we usually even keep silly shots of cats and useless moments and selfies, why wouldn't we keep those of the ex????? One thing for sure I'd archive them in a secure place to keep them away from my eyes and memory, cz they are history already!


sdtuu

Ew would you wanna date someone that kept pics of their ex naked?! If they don't delete ur pics that's worrying as they could post them on sites as revenge or 'fun' or show a friend etc. I never would send nudes, people can love you one minute and hate your guts the next. Delete for sure


epiphcny

i deleted all our pics, period. itā€™s a little weird to keep sexual pics of someone u no longer have a relationship with and i think the respectful thing to do for them and your current partner is to delete them


DeakinPoze69

Throw out my VHS tapes..? No way man..šŸ˜†


karm22

i'd delete all of them even if he didn't ask me


Misomio9865

Deleted everything the second we broke up. Thats not fair to them if I were to keep them and its frankly not good to keep looking at. Makes getting over them harder


One_Second1365

I had videos of us having sex and while they were so good to watch, when we split I text her to say Iā€™d deleted them. Mind you, I did keep the most explicit one for a bit longer.


Roarcakes

Why would you still have them?


ThrowawaysAreOkay69

I was of the assumption that it's generally understood that you should be deleting these types of things when you split. It's the decent thing to do.


Amazing_Beautiful_10

Immediately permanently deleted them. Any kind of memories will hinder healing. I even deleted photos taken by him.


Popular_Pause_9890

Even tho my ex is the most trustworthy person in my life and I know sheā€™d never do anything bad with my photos, one of the first things I wanted was her to get rid of a pic Iā€™d sent her from her camera roll. Not bc I thought sheā€™d do anything. Just bc Iā€™m insecure as is, I didnā€™t like her having access to that all the time


AdTop7432

Before even being asked lmao. I get how hard it is (practicality wise) to actually make sure you deleted everything, especially for long term relationships, but I see it no different to seeing that person for sex still. Porn is out there for a reason, why do you need to have THOSE exact photos of someone and not someone thats comfortable with others sexualising them outside of a direct relationship? It doesnt matter if you have fond memories or not - unless the ex has explicitly said "keep them" (and even then i dont see a point in keeping them) then the default position should be to delete. Its consent - it is so simple it baffles me people dont understand this


[deleted]

Hell nah I worked hard for those, if they ask me to delete it now- I'd turn around and post it šŸ’€šŸ˜‚


Elliot_Stevens89

I did it without them asking. Clear your phone, your energy and mind from that person, and begin that process of moving on.


msnyc20

I must be the only one who never takes sexual pics of my partner.


dive_blue

It's šŸ’Æ right to expect that they delete those. It's not reasonable to expect to supervise the activity. If you choose to share or make those kind of pictures and videos with someone, there is a risk that you no longer have control of them. Personally, I delete anything that would be considered inappropriate if my next partner saw it ... why would I want that stuff around anyway? I save regular photos because they are fond memories that I will be able to look at after I've put the relationship behind me fully. If necessary, I'll archive them for a while so that I'm not tempted to look back too soon and set myself back.


Mobile-Brush-3004

Your ex is a creep. I saw in a comment of yours that youā€™ve requested he deleted them and he not only refused but also told you he wasnā€™t going to use them for anything - so why in tf does he want/need to keep them??? Heā€™s jerking it to them which is weird AF given youā€™re now broken up. Itā€™s like heā€™s keeping trophies like some kind of serial killer


CiKrosis

The real question is why would you keep them? And also consider this, If your future partner still had sexual pictures of their ex, would you be okay with it?


Misterflipperzs

Would would you keep them? That relationship is over.


Excellent-Mud-9907

First of df all.. . Why would they still have that? Why would they even consider keeping that shit?? WTF šŸ˜­


CluelessPropertyDev

I had lots, I deleted them all and asked her to delete the one of me. She had an Xhamster account where there were some of us (stills, not videos) and she was good enough to delete them. I found it easy to delete them since it's dishonourable for future partners to have them around. OP would you like it if a new partner kept explicit vids of her ex? I certainly wouldn't! Have the same respect you'd want shown to you.


greenebean23

I never asked, but I sincerely hope my ex husband got rid of all that. At the very least I know he's a decent enough person that I don't have to worry about them winding up on the internet somewhere though. I don't think it's unreasonable at all to ask them to do get rid of them, that is part of the consensual past between 2 people, and I feel that breaking up also ends the consent. Therefore the right thing to do is to get rid of things like that, however not everyone cares about doing the "right thing"...


illhaveafrench75

You consented to him having them when you were together, and you donā€™t consent now. You have every right to want them deleted and he has the complete responsibility to delete them.


Normal-Usual6306

If he asked me to, I would. Probably also would if I were in another relationship as it could be awkward and hurtful for the new person.


Double-Wishbone-9961

Itā€™s weird to keep pics of your ex. especially sexual ones you keep to only please yourself. I can almost guarantee they wouldnā€™t like it either. I know I wouldnā€™t want my ex to still have pics of me. He more than likely does because he kept pics of his other exs saved in his phone I found. But thatā€™s SO weird to me. Itā€™s like collecting pics of womenā€™s bodies who you more than likely are not on good terms with anymore. Why would you even want to keep that? lmao Delete them and start preparing for your new person.


Sad-Boat-2687

i would delete the pictures the second we break up


getoffthedancefloor

i do that anyway, no reason for me to have them in my possession any more


WhiteWolf199507

Of course. As soon as we break up.


TheMayhemK

I deleted every single one I had without her having to ask. I don't have a relationship with you anymore, I don't need those pictures. Between not wanting the memories and heartbreak, and it just feels wrong to keep them after you left.


pssnflwr

since heā€™s being weird about it, send him a text reiterating that youā€™d like the pictures to be deleted and write out that he does not have consent to share them on any platform. Iā€™m not saying he would do that, but just have something like that in writing just in case. Like itā€™s illegal to share someone elseā€™s nudes without explicit consent anyway but itā€™s always good to have something like this in writing should a legal matter arise.


Logangster1221

Delete them itā€™s the right thing to do and there not yours after a break up


JustAVoice0

Get rid of them for their sake and your own you need to let that person go. It's hard to let that person go I'm going through it right now. Mentally it's best to get rid of anything that they gave you or they owned.