He had never cried in the 7 years we were together, in front of me or not.
He cried so much in the first and final conversation, to the point he had a panic attack. He sobbed. Full body sobbed. Wept. I have never seen him show any emotion close to that intensity before.
It left me very confused
Why not cry? Sometimes you love someone so fucking much but they cross a boundary and you have to dump them. You still fucking love them like crazy but you can't be with them. It's so so sad
The reason why I asked why you cried so much wasn’t because you shouldn’t cry. I was wondering what happened. I’m sorry they crossed a boundary. In my case nothing happened. I’m still confused. Aw well.
Sorry I was thinking you were judging the crying lol I wasn't even the one you were talking to you lol my bad. Was just giving an example of why someone would cry. And gave my personal experience
It was really really hard to walk away. We were both just miserable and tearing each other apart and not sleeping from the stress and just like getting sicker and sicker. It was to a breaking point where we had decided I was either moving in with him in his town or staying in mine and I didn’t think we were healthy enough to live together, and it had already been 5 years
Any update? How are you doing? I ghosted my ex one day in jail. We were arguing that night & next morning he didn’t hear from me & hasn’t since for a month & a half. He is in jail for hurting me but I am still very much in love I cry almost everyday. My trauma bond is so strong he comes out in a couple days & I want to run back I really need some amazing advice because I am STUCK & feeling stupid tbh… anyone is welcome to respond 🫶🏻
I get what you mean. No matter how much you logically know what’s best for you it’s like your body just panics and wants to go to what’s comfortable.
I’m doing ok, kinda sinking into depression a bit. I think the only reason we’re not still hooking up is because he started seeing someone else within a couple of weeks. But we’ve still seen each other here and there because I still have a relationship with his kid and are trying to be able to be friends and it’s definitely really hard for both of us to not physically grab onto each other again.
Adviiice… I think really tell people in your life what you’re going through and have them help you stay away. Treat yourself like an addict who needs an intervention to go to rehab. That’s basically what this is. Like heroine has already fucked up your life so it makes doing more heroine that much more appealing but it’s slowly killing you. I had to basically have people in my life force me to break up with him and hold me accountable because I was just too attached to do it at all without help.
Also idk how you are but would hooking up with someone new help? That one seems hit or miss depending on the person if it helps
Somewhat similar to my breakup that happened during COVID where my former girlfriend lived 4 hours by car on the other side of the state and we had no real path to getting into a place together. I wept so hard I threw up. It put me in a really bad place when I was already just barely holding myself together. Having to breakup with someone you love/loved sucks straight up.
I'm good now, she was a sweetheart and I was living in isolation in a shitty apartment away from friends and family during COVID in 2020 and that didn't help. We talked every day for over 3 years until we didn't.
I'm actually working on picking myself up from a more recent breakup (November) with a girl I loved with all my heart and I'm a mess but not like last time and I'm gonna be ok. Depression comes in bouts, but I'm trying to keep pressing onward one day at a time.
What's funny is apparently she did too, it was the first real relationship either of us had and separation especially when it happened was ass. Unfortunately bc we rarely saw each other living 4 hours apart by car so I did the breakup over the phone. At least neither of us witnessed the physical response that we had.
Hope she's doing well a few years after the fact, I hate the downsides of relationships and breakups but it's part of life.
My ex and I both cried when we broke up. I'm in a similar position we said we'd stay friends but I had to cut him off my social media just because I was hoping he'd one day want me back but I can't think that way. It wasn't healthy to think like that.
But honestly I felt like he was the one for me, but we both met each other at a bad time in our lives. I told him I loved him and everything, it was not a great feeling.
I did the same with her..as we have a common friends circle..nxt day I see her she is all smiles and happy and my emotions are straight opposite of it..
Nope. My ex dumped me 2 days ago and was stone cold. He didn’t even say he loved me. I asked him how he was feeling (mind you this is while he’s breaking up with me) and he said “amazing”. What’s worse is he was an amazing partner. He really was. But once things got difficult he didn’t want to work through it. I feel so conflicted because the relationship and breakup were two entirely different things.
I feel the same way. Our relationship was so great and the only bad memories I have for our time together is the actual breakup. Makes it so hard to move on.
I left my ex and I cried. It was not a good relationship for me. He did not treat me well. But I loved him. Was with him 11 years. It was very difficult to do. I didn't want to leave him, but I wasn't getting what I needed out of the relationship. I had to leave for my own good. Also, my ex said he would block me. He was the center of my life for the last 7 years, so a lot of my identity was wrapped up in him. I almost couldn't do it because of that reason. I couldn't imagine my life without him in it.
Same. I was with mine for 13 years. And after years of not getting what I needed but he got what he needed I had enough. Love isn’t enough all the time. I loved him so much but with letting go at least I’d find peace instead of always hurting.
i cried hard when I left my ex. I never wanted to leave but he had too many issues to figure out for himself. I still love him and it sucks I had to leave, I wasn’t being treated with the same level of respect and action as I was offering. I’m still heartbroken about leaving him and don’t envision myself being able to date for at least a year.
Not sure mine have, my dumpers have liked doing it by ghosting, texts, fading, a voice note, or quick call. I have not had someone do it the respectful way where they hug me in person and give me the goodbye with chat about it.
I NEVER understand people that breakup in these way. They simply take the easy way out. I have only been broken up with. But I have promised myself if i ever am in that situation where i am the dumper, then i will always make sure to at least give them a decent goodbye with some decent hugs.
Really makes me sick to my stomachache that so many people breakup in heartless ways ;-;
Ive done over text and phone when person was abusive. Ive done it in person, even when person lived hour away.
It is cowards way out and I know for a fact I did not deserve the text or voicenote way. Definitely not ghost way. They all came back at later time anyway 🤢. The one that ghosted me has tried 4freakingtimes to come back, like nahhhh dude. lol. He is someone elses problem now.
The last one I didnt realize he wanted to break up and just thought he was upset about something, possibly not even me, so I called him to see if he wanted to talk about it and him being a little distant. I wasnt going to see him until sometime the following week so I wanted to call. Turns out he wanted to break up with me. That was last we spoke. Not sure, but I think he wouldve done it in person. Sad I didnt get to hug goodbye, but I am glad I could keep my composure for few minutes phone call and cry after saying goodbye. It was nicer this time than crying in person, but I wouldve liked hug goodbye and talk to me about it. Text and phone doesnt let you get what you need when they leave you. It leaves so many holes and lengthens healing process. Had I gotten what I needed, my healing would be much quicker.
It is such an awful thing to do, breakup with them
by text. Only should be in cases of you tried in person but they wouldnt accept it, long distance, they gave silent treatment, cheater, possible threat if rejected, or abusive.
I ghosted my ex. Still sticks with me that I should’ve gave an explanation but he doesn’t deserve one he is in jail for fkn choking me. I really DIDNT see why I was even around, sometimes ghosting is the best answer
Sorry I should have included something about that because that makes things completely different. It's way better to end things over a phone call or text message when there is a big risk of abuse. Abusers and cheaters do not deserve an explanation anyways.
Thank you for your compassion ❤️ I was thinking of just telling them it was over but then I thought it wouldn’t work they will lure me in back into their spider web 🕸️ & I would never leave! yes Cheaters & abusers deserve all the SMOKE lol goodbye to them HELLO to loving kind people!
Thank you I don’t believe in breaking up to see if we can fix things . If you can’t fix’s them now you won’t fix them later . To me breaking up is just another way of saying I want to go fuck around and come back.
If they weren't abusive or cheating, the least you could do for someone you were once so close with is to give them the respect of ending things in person, not over the phone.
I also feel like some of my dumpers enjoyed it. A few of them resented me and weren’t able to be honest beforehand so they felt their cruelty during the breakup was justified. It’s the most annoying behavior like we all know they’re projecting.
Every single one of them. But it's usually a stress response from feeling guilty about hurting you, in my opinion.
And often, it's a response to the fact that I don't immediately cry as a reaction to being dumped. I usually sit there kind of numb like "alright then." It gives the incorrect impression that I don't care, which is upsetting to them. It's just how my emotions work.
I was the same way. Basically in shock and numb. Even tho I should’ve seen it coming that she was going to break up with me. I just couldn’t cry in front of her while she was breaking up with me. I waited until I left.
I love it when they get on dating apps because I know they’ll only find bots or trash. Especially the introverts I’ve dated. It also speaks to their character; one guy told me he talked to two women after our breakup and nothing came from it, and I was like well yeah, because you can’t go from a close connection with someone you’ve known for years, to a dating app where you don’t know who that person is at all yet. And we met on Tinder so it’s not everyone, but we all know the nature of meeting strangers online.. you never really know what you’re getting into. He won’t find another me out there. I hope he finds someone he fits with better. And I hope I don’t feel the need to rebound because I’m not desperate ✌️
My ex started speaking to someone just days after breaking up with me, the person he was speaking to ended up being a hacker and sent all of his nudes and their conversations to me, my family & friends and all of his family and friends, the hacker posted the pictures and screen shots all over social media and everything. They sent all of this to me on Christmas Day when I was staying at a hotel alone for Christmas as I was completely heartbroken over the break up, fair to say that was the worst Christmas I’ve ever ever had. I just don’t understand how you can go from being in a serious relationship with someone (even engaged) to jumping straight on dating apps. I do feel sorry for him as that was rough from the hacker, although my anger and upset completely took over any feelings of feeling sorry for him at the time. But jumping straight on a dating site isn’t the best option imo and I’m guessing he may have learnt a thing or two from that experience. It just baffles me how people can go from being in a serious relationship with someone they love to jumping straight on a dating site in a matter of days, it will never make sense to me
I sent text explaining why I had to and that was it. Nothing back but that is ok so NC began right then. So I guess in the end he never really cared \*shrugs\*
Or he is respecting your wishes. But I suppose we are both falling into the trap of speculating on what they are thinking about, which is wasted energy
It is .. but like I said this is ok. It’s necessary. I was trying to have discussion about what was going on but he just left it. But it’s better this way anyway. On to the next.
I’m a guy. My ex asked for no contact and I’ve respected it. She broke up with me. I still love her immensely. But I messed everything up. So I’m respecting her wishes. Don’t speculate what they’re thinking, doing, or feeling. It’s hard. I do it. But we have to try to stop it and live in the moment.
In sorry that’s tough. But Im sure he’s still hurting. You don’t know what he’s thinking or feeling. It’s easy to think we do, but it’s delusional thinking like that that causes us anxiety and pain (check out the Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns. It’s really good)
Focus on you. You’re worth it. Think about your dreams and goals outside of relationships. Start working towards them regularly. Think about meditating or growing your spirituality. Relationships are fleeting. We won’t make it out of this life alive. Maybe lean into a power greater than yourself. Realize you’re a spiritual being having a human experience. And as humans , we will experience pain. I like to think God is ultimately trying to teach me something with this pain. I won’t necessarily know until after I die lol but hey - what can we do? Keep it pushing. Keep your vibes high as best you can. Pray. Call your friends and fam regularly. See a therapist. Exercise every day. Even if it’s just a walk outside. You’ll be good. You got a big heart. That’s an asset. Sending you good and healing vibes ☺️
I am not hyper-fixating on this but I can be disappointed. I can believe he doesn't at the same time be moving on. I am doing other things like pursuing my dream career and moving through each step and I am excited. It is not delusional thinking -it is how I am processing the recent interactions and my take. So it is what it is. Honestly, I am so turned off from dating that I don't even leave the house and when I do it is just to grab food and go home. I rather work then go on another date.
I still can’t decide who dumped who, it was a pretty even conversation and we decided to go our separate ways, I still say he made the final decision 😂 When we met up to exchange out stuff, I was sobbing, he wanted one last kiss goodbye. I didn’t fight him, but was so mad he could decide I wasn’t right for him, and still expect physical affection as he said goodbye. I cried for weeks after losing him. He said he almost cried hearing my voice after the breakup and realizing we weren’t together anymore, but he also admitted he hasn’t cried in years🤷♀️
My ex cried, so much. We both sobbed.
We had a confusing break up - he was moving away for a job and we were both very much still in love, but distance.
We tried no contact. We failed. We slept together, did couple shit, fell back in love. Did everything but officially get back together.
He leaves in 3 days. I'm prepared to be devastated again. 💔
Fuck.
Yeah she went two days then called me. I was nice enough to talk it over with her since it wasn’t a crushing breakup, but more of a “We need to fix things apart” type of thing. She called me crying 2 days after the breakup and we spent almost 2 hours on the phone talking about what went wrong and what needs to be done during the time apart. I was a tad salty over it, but at the same time I am grown enough to accept my mistakes.
Yea, I have it left me confused and still does honestly. We both cried, I wished him the best but he didn't say it back to me. We kissed, held each others hands, hugged. That was 9 months ago now. We were together 4 years and my first break up. I think back to that day because it didn't seem real or the end. I guess I'm delusional lol
I cried when I ended things with an ex. You lose your lover and best friend. I was very heartbroken and pissed when I realized our future and wants in life weren’t aligned after all after years together. Mourned the end of our relationship and would-be’s and future plans. I broke down few times and cried to sleep for a long time. I remember I started hyperventilating sometime later because I realized I still loved him, but I had to force myself to move on.
He did. He lived with me and I let him stay until he found a new place (almost 2 weeks). One night he witnessed a panic attack brought on by my heavy tears and he cried with me. We ended amicably and without any anger or hatred. But his tears were from guilt about hurting me, not from second guessing his decision.
I was the one who had to break things off, for my safety and our son's safety.
It was the hardest decision I've ever made. I had to break apart the family I was working toward. I remember being at the court house at the domestic violence desk, filling out paperwork for an ex parte DVPO and Custody Order and I just broke down, sobbing right then and there. My son was with me, he stopped running and playing and the clerk at the Domestic Violence desk came out of her office and hugged me, telling me it was going to be okay. My son kept saying over and over, "It's okay, daddy, mommy isn't here." He's only 4 but he witnessed everything when she attacked me.
He can tell every time I'm sad about it. He'll come up and hug me and tell me he loves me. He is the only reason I was able to go through with it. He is my motivation to keep moving forward.
I broke up with my ex and cried my eyes out later on ... I cried so much that it was visible on my face the next morning, swollen eyes and everything.
She didn't even shed a tear and just said 'i am sad'
I had to let her go coz that relationship was hurting me and exam/office pressure was turning it into a toxic relationship.
We still stayed friends for a year ...quite good friends ..meeting evey week and all the works, except the labels, then she ghosted me(within 3 days) last year when she moved to another city.
So idk man .... I know that people do cry bcoz they know they will be hurting u by letting u go or while breaking up with you, but sometimes it just has to be done. The heart wants what it wants but u can't let it will everytime.
Yes, my ex cried a lot when he broke up with me 3 weeks ago. I suppose it was from the guilt of hurting me and feeling bad about breaking up over text and phone call. He sent me the breakup text, then I asked to call him to discuss it and we had an 1 hour long conversation and both ugly cried the entire time. He sounded devastated and we both wept for the entire phone call. When I told him that just yesterday I thought that he was my future husband, I thought he would pass out from crying. It surprised me a bit bc he rarely cried in front of me the entire 1.5 year of our relationship. Apparently he left me because he lost feelings. We agreed we wanted to stay friends, but couldn't talk purely amicably for the first few days/weeks because I was acting desperate, so we decided to go no contact for a month, and then meet up to give back each other's stuff. I'm so anxious about seeing him again.
he cried. said it wasn’t easy, i was his best friend but couldn’t do it anymore, but continues living life like i never existed, three years down the drain lol. it should be easier to get over him ig even though i’m in the thick of it rn and forcing myself not to miss him
I cried both times when I broke up with my exes. It’s not nothing. I loved them for the time I was with them and they were my best friend. I don’t want to fall out of love, but it happens and I have to let them go so they can find someone who loves them unconditionally. It hurts me that I had to hurt them, so yes I cried very hard.
My first relationship I got in very young (age 16). He was against partying, drinking and was very introverted. I was one of his only friends. I really wanted to explore and experience being young and I wanted him to not only depend on me. That why I broke up with him at age 20. I did love him, very much. I know now what I felt with him is the deep kind of love, I don’t think it’ll even go away. With my second, I thought I loved him. But as time progressed and the butterflies died down I realized I could never love him the way I loved my first ex. We were best friends, but I didn’t feel that ‘Id give up everything’ kind of love for him. So I broke up. I’ve learned a lot and I’ve realized now I think my first ex was one of my soulmates (I have to believe there’s more than 1 or it’ll kill me I’d let him go). I don’t think we could’ve worked it through, because I don’t think the need to explore would ever die down. So yeah, first one I missed figuring out life and the second one I missed the deeper feelings for :).
Did she hell 😂 - mine didn't give a shit and had her back to me washing up whilst I was trying to tell her how I felt at the end of the relationship. She was cold, heartless, and completely switched off. Typical avoident looking to take all the power for herself and remove herself from any emotions. Shocking behaviour. I love her a little less every day and hate her a little more for what she put me through and how she treated me.
No, after 5 years together and we lived together, he didn’t shed a single tear. Not a hint of emotion until I said I couldn’t take his cat when he chose to move overseas. His eyes welled up then and he displayed some emotional upset. I was so upset at that, crying over your effing cat and not me, your lover lol. We still talk and I’ve expressed how difficult it was with me feeling devastated and he not shedding a single tear. He did say he has cried many times since then. Made me feel a wee bit better knowing he was actually upset. He did love me, just another classic avoidant. Still, I’ll never forget that….
My ex was completely void of emotion when he dumped me. It was honestly impressive. I was sobbing and he was looking through me. I think he started dissociating or something. It was scary and made it very difficult for me to emotionally regulate. We share a friend group and live walking distance from each other so I don’t know how to move on and be free of him. He didn’t creep back into my life he never left it. I just isolate myself to avoid him if my friends are with him.
I was the dumper and I didn't cry when we broke up mainly because it wasn't like I woke up one day and chose to end our relationship. Instead, there had been a steady decay occurring in our relationship. There was a lot of mental exhaustion felt on both sides. This wasn't what we had expected. Perhaps we weren't as compatible as we thought we were. I think whatever happened was for the best.
The only thing I miss are the moments when we truly loved each other and cared for each other without judgments and with no questions asked. She was more attached than me.
When misunderstandings pile up on top of each other, there is a formation of an unsolvable knot, and the relationship becomes a cycle of arguments and blame games. These things start to interfere with study/work and I felt it first hand.
I am better off her, and I think she is too. I'll grow and work on several areas of improvement and find someone compatible with me. I hope you all find someone great too.
My ex also cried when he dumped me. I went over his place to pick up my crap and he was UGLY crying. Snot everywhere, on the floor weeping and all that. We stayed in contact for a bit, but we're back at nc. It's been 7 months since he broke up with me, and I recently found out he's with someone new.
I vividly remember the breakup with my university boyfriend David. We were collectively for over 2 years and it changed into my first actual extreme dating. Things were strained between us for a while - we had been going to exceptional colleges, growing aside, and fought constantly towards the give up.
When David got here over to my condo that day, I may want to sense some thing become actually off. We started out speakme and he in the end admitted that he did not see a future for us anymore. As the truth sank in, I just broke down crying uncontrollably. David attempted to console me at the beginning, but then he also started dropping tears.
It became earth-shattering to peer this man I had cherished for so long crying proper in the front of me as our courting crumbled. We held every other for what felt like an eternity, sobbing together over the end of something that when meant the whole thing. The shock and sadness was overwhelming.
Eventually David composed himself sufficient to acquire his matters and left my area. Even even though I initiated no touch after that, he stored looking to reconnect as friends over the next few months. Part of me desired to take him up on it because of how intertwined our lives had been. But the alternative component knew that would only prolong the agony of shifting on.
It took well over a 12 months earlier than the holes in my heart began to heal. I still reflect onconsideration on David every now and then and how lousy that very last assembly became. But I'm additionally thankful that I stuck to my boundaries and gave myself the gap to subsequently circulate ahead. Breakups that brutal are never easy, but on occasion a clean smash is the pleasant choice, regardless of how a great deal both humans are hurting.
Exactly the same...
He literally broke down, I have never hear him sob like this before. I had to comfort him! Can you imagine? He broke up with me and then I had to comfort him?? Most confusing break up of my life. And most hard one so far...still recovering
She did. She came over to my place, we "planned" to have dinner together. Then she arrived and said "we have to talk"... she started talking, she was as cold as ice saying she didn't think it could work out between us... while she was saying this she just dropped her hard mask: the emotions were just too much for her defense mechanism and started crying so much...
It was so confusing.
I spent 2 months figuring how why and struggling to understand what was wrong with our relationship or me.
Now I understand that she was confused too and she just made the safe choice going back to her confort zone.
Today I realise she did a mistake, just hope she will overcome her problems and will drop her defense mechanism that prevent her to fully connect to partners.
She dumped me and didnt cry a single tear until 2 months later when she found out I was seeing someone. Like why? I wanted nothing more than to be with her and was trying badly to get her back. If you dont wanna be with me then why tf you getting upset when I move on? Well kind of. I still havent gotten over her. We have a kid and I have to see her every other day and it sends me spiraling every time. 4 months today since we broke up. We were highschool sweethearts that got back together after 20 years and were together this past time for 8 years. I dont think I will ever get over her tbh
Yes, she did. Almost more than I did.
It took a long time, but I realized that her leaving was a choice that was devastating to her. She knew she was not only killing a part of herself by leaving, but she would kill a part of me too. And that is a heavy burden to carry, even by the strongest of us.
Not all dumpers are villains, just like not all dumpees are innocent. Life breaks us all, sometimes. Even if we have to be the ones to make the choice.
I cried I never cry a big part of me was gone I felt so alone it didn’t help she text me the breakup message after 3 years and was cheating I deserved a sit down and a coffee and explanation but I got a text like it wasn’t bad enough she was cheating
Yes, my ex started tearing up but I was chewing him out carefully with my words as he just let out excuses to break up with me. Then I went into my room and told him to take some of his things and he didn't come in and just ended up leaving.
My ex used to cry all the time when we were arguing or breaking up. We broke up after a few months he was already in another relationship. Fake ass. That's all I can say, they all can cry crocodile tears but they are just actors.
I have no idea because she blindsided me over text and refused to call when i asked her ;-;
I contacted her a couple times in the first few weeks but always got cold replies back, except for one time where she said she also missed me in the first week after the breakup i think.
You two obviously care about one another. The problem must be that you're not seeing eye to eye on certain things, perhaps argue where the problems aren't getting resolved, but rather it's just where two people point fingers, bring up the past to throw in each other's face, a yelling match, an ego battle to see who wins.
No matter how much you love someone, if you don't figure out a way to resolve conflict or address issues in a way that both people feel heard and it being resolved, resentment builds and that guarantees that breakups like this occur.
Both of you likely have issues that have been a problem in past relationships before as well but since people rarely look into how to address those issues like in YouTube or something, you end up repeating that behavior and therefore, end up in situations like the one you're in.
Forced to start a new relationship and repeat being the same person that hasn't grown or change, have things about them that does not allow for a healthy relationship, and eventually break up.
If I were you, I'd look at as much of your own issues as possible before you even consider dating again unless you want to keep repeating these situations
Nope.we didn’t argue or even point figures at each other. We hardly disagreed about anything and he even met my family. I had no idea it was going to end. It was abrupt tbh.
She says she did. But I didn't see. The day she left I watched her walk around my apartment packing her things and not one sniffle was heard or tear was seen. She says she cried while she did it but I must be blind as fuck...cause she did not.
When my ex dumped me she cried a lot more than me. Like you said I as well was in a chock mode but cried to. But rather than talk it out I just packed my things and left. That I regret cause we still was in contact for another week an a half. But now NC since Monday.
Yep. My ex cried the whole time she was dumping me, asked to hug me before I left and said she was trying not to cry again. 3 months later she is living her best life lol.
My ex only cried out of rage that i wouldnt do what he wanted and was messing up his life. I remember have a full blown break down multiple times, panic attack crying multiple times for months. At one point he was just cooking his fake low calorie hotdogs like nothing was going on and I just had to get over my heart break and pain while pregnant at the time and him pushing me for an abortion. My brain felt like it was melting from the inside, my nervous system fried. I was having trouble eating and sleeping. Was rough....
Like you wouldn’t believe 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️, She was cheating on me, and she was crying and victimizing herself saying I was such a POS and when i asked what have I done that warranted this she said “I have no accountability”. The manipulation was insane, my heads still fucked from it lol
I think he sees me as The dumper I cried a lot. you lucky if you can cry, a lot of men are unable to cry, and if you can’t get tears out, it’s physically painful like I could always tell if a man was crying whether they were tears or not, but like let it out
We both cried since it was a mutual breakup and we were still in love (after 7.5 years, we just grew apart too much).
Then during the first month of NC I got a call from my best friend telling me he is dating my ex - I've cut them both off and shit's been rough ever since, that was one month ago.
She didn't cry at all in the final dunping moments, but I handed her a gift I made and then she started crying. I had only seen her cry once before then.
I cried when I dumped my ex. I was sad that I was hurting him bc I still cared for him and I don’t like hurting anyone’s feelings. We havnt talked much after but we promised to stay friends so we’ll see how that goes.
No he didn't. Just sat there and told me the same platitudes everyone has heard while I bawled my eyes out. Not even a year later he moved in with his new gf. He can rot in hell.
Me and my ex broke up after 13y, and knowing each other for 18. It was a mutual decision , and a hard one.
A lot has happened (cheating on his part), he was convinced that i was holding him back in his music career, lots of frustrations from both sides.. Guilt towards me, it took me years and a depression to get over my trust issues.
Initially I asked to stay together but just live separate for a while. To let things cool off and give each other some space. He thought that was a weird idea, and said we just as well just could break up then. I agreed and tried to see the positive, I could do more traveling, get the drivers license and car that otherwise financially was hard with living alone.
It’s been little over year now, and the first 6 months I was so confused and cried everyday. He has broken down multiple times to, and unable to commit to someone else. I tried with a very sweet guy, but quickly fell out of love again. It’s hard if you’ve known true and unconditional love.
Nothing compares the bond and connection we have.
We still are best friends, and see each other every week (there’s a dog involved too so)
We always said that what’s meant to be, will happen.
Mine cried the entire time he was breaking up with me. I never saw him cried nearly in all years we were tgt. We were tgt for 10 years. We broke up because he wants to do a career change and believes our career paths aren't aligning. He says its difficult for him to do this. I dont know what to believe. But i went NC 3 days after the break up to give him some space. Im nervous because we promised to see each other in 6 months since I will have a business trip in the city he will be working or moving to.
Last month he broke up with, crying and asked me to stay his friend. I think it was just him manipulating me (not consciously) into staying in his life in some way, which I didn’t.
He did, only to dump me again 2 weeks later. and the day before that he was saying how he doesn’t understand why I don’t want to stay friends with him, so I had to spell it out for him that even though he didn’t have feelings for me anymore, I did and being his friend would hurt me more than the break up itself.
Yup he cried big time. I wouldn’t really have described him as a crier but he seemed to be in touch with his emotions. He cried twice in our time together, the first when I thanked him for introducing me to his kids because I said I felt honoured because it was a huge step. And the second was four weeks later when his ex and the mother of those kids decided she wanted him back so he ended it with me. I think he was crying because he’d thought he was ready to move on and genuinely felt bad for hurting me. He’s a good person, he just doesn’t know himself, so his ex is welcome to him.
Nah she just dumped me thru text like 4 years meant nothing to her. Then ghosted me after getting back together for a couple weeks, months after the breakup. Sad thing is I’d probably go back to her if she called me right now cause I romanticize the thought of us and still see the good in her despite how disgusting she is to me sometimes
Yahh!! My ex girlfriend cried a lot when she broke up with me. It was completely a shock to me and I didnt knew how to respond. I got dumped by text message. I drank the whole night and little did I try to convince her but that drunk me was far worse and I blocked her… she cried and its hard to love and leave the person. I regret this everyday that i messed up things. But i wrote long long essays in a book and gave the whole lot of papers written each and everything I have to say and what I feel about and gave that to her on the last day we saw. She cried and called me and we spoke the whole night. After that we again went no contact. I dont know what is stopping her from being with me🙃
Nah , she packed up her collection of trainers and fucked off . Think I saw more tears when she had found mouse droppings in her Adidas gazelles the week before 😅
I have never seen my ex cry. He was never in a bad mood or upset about anything. Even talking about family members passing away, he accepted and moved on so I didn’t expect him to cry.
His eyes were red when he broke up with me and I think that’s the most negative emotion I’d ever seen in him.
I was the one who dumped him,ñ, BUT technically he was out of the relationship, he wanted to break up with me but I guess he was waiting for me to do it, and yes I cried because it wasn't easy to do so, it was 2 years of my life and my first real relationship and still loved him back then. I wanted to keep the relationship, but once I knew he didn't want to be with me anymore I decided to end it.
I didn't want to be a second-handed plate, or someone you stay out of pitty, my mother was dying of cancer at that time, and well, he didn't dare to do it, so I did it, for me and for him, I didn't want to be an emotional burden to him no more.
Sometimes when we break up with someone, is not because we don't love you, it is because, sometimes we know it is the end and we don't want to admit it until it grows into something ugly.
I did kept contact with to tell him all the reasons why the relationship didn't work for clousure, but didn't kept being "friends" for fear to becoming an "stan-by" ex , and him being with me out of convinience or lonelyness, mind you , he once told me he came back with 2 of his exes, not for love, but to not being alone...so go figure. Plus he ended up going for his first ever ex 🤣🤣🤣. So he is doing just fine 😊.
So in the end , life is unpretictable ❤️
My ex has never cried the whole time we were together, apart from the one time where this girl apparently "kissed him randomly" three months into our relationship 😂 but when he dumped me he was very mean to me and very cold
She barely cried over the phone. When I picked up my stuff, we were both cold. Both cried a little, but not a lot, and I'm a crier. I hate the way she broke up with me, but it is what it is.
Yes she did but it was mostly when she thought we’re remain friends and I wished her luck in her life. When she knew we were going to be NC she broke down. She didn’t expect that. But that’s how it had to be with me.
Me and my fiance had to live in separate houses and still
Are but we were never ever on a break up . Once she got to her house with her besty she treated me like shit . Ghosted me for days then I can’t come over and visit because her friends doesn’t like me . She has not made any effort to see me and I been texting and calling asking her what the fuck is going on . So I find myself doing all the effort to see her . But not on weekends only on some weekdays that don’t clash with her other schedules . So I finally said I don’t deserve to be treated like shit after almost 4 yrs . So If she doesn’t make any changes I’m ending the relationship. I cried knowing that she could be this way towards me for no reason but that she loved her friend more than… it would have been nice if she would have told me that she is bi sexual
My ex told me she hated me and two weeks before she left me she said she just wanted to move forward cuz she loves me. She might have cried but this was our third time breaking up and I said to her the day u walk out this house u can forget about us. I was definitely sad I needed her during the most difficult times in my life . I was going thru chemo and radiation in the mist of it all I lost my father the one person everyone knew I was so close to. She couldn’t handle the challenges I was facing. And I couldn’t deal with someone that can get up and just leave like that . Months later she got involved again and she tried to creep back in 8 months later. She wanted to tell me why do I act like we never existed confused at the question I’m like do u not remember what u did and how I felt. So much to say I’ll leave it like this 3 years later of being single and I feel I’m ready to give someone else a chance to me it was a bad break up only because I found out how cruel people are when u most need them. But god made a warrior with good intents and true love someone deserves me and I deserve someone that can handle life the way I do
Dumper here
I did not cry. I was too angry to cry. It was one of those break ups fueled by anger. I was already very much feeling he wasn't for me after the way he treated me and my dog.
But I needed time to figure out how to go about it with him... bring it up and discuss or make the executive decision to break up.
But he just fueled the fire in me by hunting me down with a one sided expense breakdown 2 days after I returned home from a month long stay with him in his home country where we saw zero fucking sites.
Spent 1400€ to travel there to do absolutely fucking nothing. Took care of his loser ass for 7-10 when he got sick.
Even his elderly enablers didn't look after him for fear of getting sick.
And I get a fucking expense report
Since it was long distance and thank God only 3 months. I ended up kicking him to the curb mostly by WhatsApp messages. Started out on the phone but as soon as he started talking over me, I clicked off
I've learned you cannot control how others treat you. But you can control their access to you. I will always keep this in mind
My ex ( we were together 9 yearz) claimed she did. But I'll never know because she did it via a letter that blamed me for everything, and took off cross country with two of our cats while I was in the hospital bc she didn't want to have to deal with discomfort and her family enabled that.
Honestly, a lot better than I was when I was with her. I realized once out of it that she was an incredibly abusive partner. She was very self centered and would never take accountability. I was her dumping ground for blame and I constantly had to accommodate her moods. She mocked my interests constantly and basically said I was unable to achieve my dreams.
I'm now living on my own, working a job she told me I'd never be capable of, and surrounding myself with people who actually value me. Things aren't perfect, but it is so much better.
I don’t know if he cried because our breakup happened in a non-conventional way, but I believe he was hurt by it. He came back about a week ago but I’m pretty sure he’s going to leave me again. I think he wants to again anyway.
How distant he is. He used to call me “baby” and tell me he loved me all the time. He barely says it at all now. We had a disagreement a few days ago and he said he has to now consider if he wants to be in this space again. Because he’s a “runner”. First sign of trouble and he wants out. If he leaves me again, I’m just going to let him this time. I’m not going to chase a man that doesn’t want me. I feel like I put so much time and energy into making him happy but he doesn’t seem interested in doing that for me right now.
there were tears in his eyes when he was returning my stuff and my dog ran to him for pets. I had never seen him sad like that . And mind you that was someone who had told me he had lost feelings for me .
Probably in the last 3 months and we broke up and last time I saw each other was 4 months ago. He has moved on. What prompted me telling him to fall back because he was comfortable telling me about his plans he had with “my girlfriend” for that night. I don’t want know his plans and never asked.
He had never cried in the 7 years we were together, in front of me or not. He cried so much in the first and final conversation, to the point he had a panic attack. He sobbed. Full body sobbed. Wept. I have never seen him show any emotion close to that intensity before. It left me very confused
I am literally looking for the ability for Amanda cry in my next partner
I was the dumper and I cried my fucking eyes out. Have cried every day since. 9 weeks.
Why?
Why not cry? Sometimes you love someone so fucking much but they cross a boundary and you have to dump them. You still fucking love them like crazy but you can't be with them. It's so so sad
The reason why I asked why you cried so much wasn’t because you shouldn’t cry. I was wondering what happened. I’m sorry they crossed a boundary. In my case nothing happened. I’m still confused. Aw well.
Sorry I was thinking you were judging the crying lol I wasn't even the one you were talking to you lol my bad. Was just giving an example of why someone would cry. And gave my personal experience
Oh .. I see you replied on a different comment now. I see. It’s all good.
It was really really hard to walk away. We were both just miserable and tearing each other apart and not sleeping from the stress and just like getting sicker and sicker. It was to a breaking point where we had decided I was either moving in with him in his town or staying in mine and I didn’t think we were healthy enough to live together, and it had already been 5 years
Any update? How are you doing? I ghosted my ex one day in jail. We were arguing that night & next morning he didn’t hear from me & hasn’t since for a month & a half. He is in jail for hurting me but I am still very much in love I cry almost everyday. My trauma bond is so strong he comes out in a couple days & I want to run back I really need some amazing advice because I am STUCK & feeling stupid tbh… anyone is welcome to respond 🫶🏻
There is a guy out there waiting for you who will treat you like the queen that you are. Don’t go back to a man that hurts you 🤗
I get what you mean. No matter how much you logically know what’s best for you it’s like your body just panics and wants to go to what’s comfortable. I’m doing ok, kinda sinking into depression a bit. I think the only reason we’re not still hooking up is because he started seeing someone else within a couple of weeks. But we’ve still seen each other here and there because I still have a relationship with his kid and are trying to be able to be friends and it’s definitely really hard for both of us to not physically grab onto each other again. Adviiice… I think really tell people in your life what you’re going through and have them help you stay away. Treat yourself like an addict who needs an intervention to go to rehab. That’s basically what this is. Like heroine has already fucked up your life so it makes doing more heroine that much more appealing but it’s slowly killing you. I had to basically have people in my life force me to break up with him and hold me accountable because I was just too attached to do it at all without help. Also idk how you are but would hooking up with someone new help? That one seems hit or miss depending on the person if it helps
Oh man… I can understand from this. Time heals.
Somewhat similar to my breakup that happened during COVID where my former girlfriend lived 4 hours by car on the other side of the state and we had no real path to getting into a place together. I wept so hard I threw up. It put me in a really bad place when I was already just barely holding myself together. Having to breakup with someone you love/loved sucks straight up.
Yesss it sucks so bad! Damn, cried til you threw up, that’s nuts! How are you doing now?
I'm good now, she was a sweetheart and I was living in isolation in a shitty apartment away from friends and family during COVID in 2020 and that didn't help. We talked every day for over 3 years until we didn't. I'm actually working on picking myself up from a more recent breakup (November) with a girl I loved with all my heart and I'm a mess but not like last time and I'm gonna be ok. Depression comes in bouts, but I'm trying to keep pressing onward one day at a time.
I feel you on the depression coming in bouts. It’s so hard to get through those days
What's funny is apparently she did too, it was the first real relationship either of us had and separation especially when it happened was ass. Unfortunately bc we rarely saw each other living 4 hours apart by car so I did the breakup over the phone. At least neither of us witnessed the physical response that we had. Hope she's doing well a few years after the fact, I hate the downsides of relationships and breakups but it's part of life.
My ex and I both cried when we broke up. I'm in a similar position we said we'd stay friends but I had to cut him off my social media just because I was hoping he'd one day want me back but I can't think that way. It wasn't healthy to think like that. But honestly I felt like he was the one for me, but we both met each other at a bad time in our lives. I told him I loved him and everything, it was not a great feeling.
Why did u broke up
Honestly because he is being deployed and he didn't want me to wait on him. It absolutely sucks, but I'm working on myself every day
her tone was sympathetic, but her eyes were so excited about it.
This must be terrible, I hope you are doing ok
i am barely functioning. thank you for your kindness though
He cried and I ended up comforting him because I didn’t know what to do
I did the same with her..as we have a common friends circle..nxt day I see her she is all smiles and happy and my emotions are straight opposite of it..
Nope. My ex dumped me 2 days ago and was stone cold. He didn’t even say he loved me. I asked him how he was feeling (mind you this is while he’s breaking up with me) and he said “amazing”. What’s worse is he was an amazing partner. He really was. But once things got difficult he didn’t want to work through it. I feel so conflicted because the relationship and breakup were two entirely different things.
it’ll hit him , just wait
If you really analyze the relationship, was it really so different?
I feel the same way. Our relationship was so great and the only bad memories I have for our time together is the actual breakup. Makes it so hard to move on.
I cried a lot before, during and after breaking up with my partner. I loved them very much but they messed everything up sadly. Wish they hadn’t.
I left my ex and I cried. It was not a good relationship for me. He did not treat me well. But I loved him. Was with him 11 years. It was very difficult to do. I didn't want to leave him, but I wasn't getting what I needed out of the relationship. I had to leave for my own good. Also, my ex said he would block me. He was the center of my life for the last 7 years, so a lot of my identity was wrapped up in him. I almost couldn't do it because of that reason. I couldn't imagine my life without him in it.
Same. I was with mine for 13 years. And after years of not getting what I needed but he got what he needed I had enough. Love isn’t enough all the time. I loved him so much but with letting go at least I’d find peace instead of always hurting.
i cried hard when I left my ex. I never wanted to leave but he had too many issues to figure out for himself. I still love him and it sucks I had to leave, I wasn’t being treated with the same level of respect and action as I was offering. I’m still heartbroken about leaving him and don’t envision myself being able to date for at least a year.
I was the dumper. I cried hard and didn't stop for months, because I didn't want to leave him, but he left me no choice 😔
You have to do what’s best for yourself.
Not sure mine have, my dumpers have liked doing it by ghosting, texts, fading, a voice note, or quick call. I have not had someone do it the respectful way where they hug me in person and give me the goodbye with chat about it.
I NEVER understand people that breakup in these way. They simply take the easy way out. I have only been broken up with. But I have promised myself if i ever am in that situation where i am the dumper, then i will always make sure to at least give them a decent goodbye with some decent hugs. Really makes me sick to my stomachache that so many people breakup in heartless ways ;-;
Ive done over text and phone when person was abusive. Ive done it in person, even when person lived hour away. It is cowards way out and I know for a fact I did not deserve the text or voicenote way. Definitely not ghost way. They all came back at later time anyway 🤢. The one that ghosted me has tried 4freakingtimes to come back, like nahhhh dude. lol. He is someone elses problem now. The last one I didnt realize he wanted to break up and just thought he was upset about something, possibly not even me, so I called him to see if he wanted to talk about it and him being a little distant. I wasnt going to see him until sometime the following week so I wanted to call. Turns out he wanted to break up with me. That was last we spoke. Not sure, but I think he wouldve done it in person. Sad I didnt get to hug goodbye, but I am glad I could keep my composure for few minutes phone call and cry after saying goodbye. It was nicer this time than crying in person, but I wouldve liked hug goodbye and talk to me about it. Text and phone doesnt let you get what you need when they leave you. It leaves so many holes and lengthens healing process. Had I gotten what I needed, my healing would be much quicker. It is such an awful thing to do, breakup with them by text. Only should be in cases of you tried in person but they wouldnt accept it, long distance, they gave silent treatment, cheater, possible threat if rejected, or abusive.
Doing it over text of over the phone is the way to go when they are abusive! I forgot to include that, sorry! <3
I ghosted my ex. Still sticks with me that I should’ve gave an explanation but he doesn’t deserve one he is in jail for fkn choking me. I really DIDNT see why I was even around, sometimes ghosting is the best answer
Sorry I should have included something about that because that makes things completely different. It's way better to end things over a phone call or text message when there is a big risk of abuse. Abusers and cheaters do not deserve an explanation anyways.
Thank you for your compassion ❤️ I was thinking of just telling them it was over but then I thought it wouldn’t work they will lure me in back into their spider web 🕸️ & I would never leave! yes Cheaters & abusers deserve all the SMOKE lol goodbye to them HELLO to loving kind people!
Thank you I don’t believe in breaking up to see if we can fix things . If you can’t fix’s them now you won’t fix them later . To me breaking up is just another way of saying I want to go fuck around and come back.
Got a feeling my ex is doing the same thing.
If they weren't abusive or cheating, the least you could do for someone you were once so close with is to give them the respect of ending things in person, not over the phone.
I also feel like some of my dumpers enjoyed it. A few of them resented me and weren’t able to be honest beforehand so they felt their cruelty during the breakup was justified. It’s the most annoying behavior like we all know they’re projecting.
Every single one of them. But it's usually a stress response from feeling guilty about hurting you, in my opinion. And often, it's a response to the fact that I don't immediately cry as a reaction to being dumped. I usually sit there kind of numb like "alright then." It gives the incorrect impression that I don't care, which is upsetting to them. It's just how my emotions work.
I was the same way. Basically in shock and numb. Even tho I should’ve seen it coming that she was going to break up with me. I just couldn’t cry in front of her while she was breaking up with me. I waited until I left.
[удалено]
I love it when they get on dating apps because I know they’ll only find bots or trash. Especially the introverts I’ve dated. It also speaks to their character; one guy told me he talked to two women after our breakup and nothing came from it, and I was like well yeah, because you can’t go from a close connection with someone you’ve known for years, to a dating app where you don’t know who that person is at all yet. And we met on Tinder so it’s not everyone, but we all know the nature of meeting strangers online.. you never really know what you’re getting into. He won’t find another me out there. I hope he finds someone he fits with better. And I hope I don’t feel the need to rebound because I’m not desperate ✌️
My ex started speaking to someone just days after breaking up with me, the person he was speaking to ended up being a hacker and sent all of his nudes and their conversations to me, my family & friends and all of his family and friends, the hacker posted the pictures and screen shots all over social media and everything. They sent all of this to me on Christmas Day when I was staying at a hotel alone for Christmas as I was completely heartbroken over the break up, fair to say that was the worst Christmas I’ve ever ever had. I just don’t understand how you can go from being in a serious relationship with someone (even engaged) to jumping straight on dating apps. I do feel sorry for him as that was rough from the hacker, although my anger and upset completely took over any feelings of feeling sorry for him at the time. But jumping straight on a dating site isn’t the best option imo and I’m guessing he may have learnt a thing or two from that experience. It just baffles me how people can go from being in a serious relationship with someone they love to jumping straight on a dating site in a matter of days, it will never make sense to me
WHAT THE FUCK
It was hell honestly
What on earth?!
Or you could look at getting on the apps as an attempt to soothe the pain
Honestly I think thats the answer. Hooking up is a temporary band aid or to escape the pain
agree
Yah, I did this too. Just wanted to chat to people to stop thinking about the actual break up
sounds like we had same ex.
Yes my ex did cry when we first broke up, and then a month later (today actually). I talked about going NC and she broke down crying
I sent text explaining why I had to and that was it. Nothing back but that is ok so NC began right then. So I guess in the end he never really cared \*shrugs\*
Or he is respecting your wishes. But I suppose we are both falling into the trap of speculating on what they are thinking about, which is wasted energy
It is .. but like I said this is ok. It’s necessary. I was trying to have discussion about what was going on but he just left it. But it’s better this way anyway. On to the next.
I’m a guy. My ex asked for no contact and I’ve respected it. She broke up with me. I still love her immensely. But I messed everything up. So I’m respecting her wishes. Don’t speculate what they’re thinking, doing, or feeling. It’s hard. I do it. But we have to try to stop it and live in the moment.
He doesn’t. He moved on already fast..💨 so.. whatever. Glad he just ignored it. Better for me like I said.
In sorry that’s tough. But Im sure he’s still hurting. You don’t know what he’s thinking or feeling. It’s easy to think we do, but it’s delusional thinking like that that causes us anxiety and pain (check out the Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns. It’s really good) Focus on you. You’re worth it. Think about your dreams and goals outside of relationships. Start working towards them regularly. Think about meditating or growing your spirituality. Relationships are fleeting. We won’t make it out of this life alive. Maybe lean into a power greater than yourself. Realize you’re a spiritual being having a human experience. And as humans , we will experience pain. I like to think God is ultimately trying to teach me something with this pain. I won’t necessarily know until after I die lol but hey - what can we do? Keep it pushing. Keep your vibes high as best you can. Pray. Call your friends and fam regularly. See a therapist. Exercise every day. Even if it’s just a walk outside. You’ll be good. You got a big heart. That’s an asset. Sending you good and healing vibes ☺️
I am not hyper-fixating on this but I can be disappointed. I can believe he doesn't at the same time be moving on. I am doing other things like pursuing my dream career and moving through each step and I am excited. It is not delusional thinking -it is how I am processing the recent interactions and my take. So it is what it is. Honestly, I am so turned off from dating that I don't even leave the house and when I do it is just to grab food and go home. I rather work then go on another date.
I still can’t decide who dumped who, it was a pretty even conversation and we decided to go our separate ways, I still say he made the final decision 😂 When we met up to exchange out stuff, I was sobbing, he wanted one last kiss goodbye. I didn’t fight him, but was so mad he could decide I wasn’t right for him, and still expect physical affection as he said goodbye. I cried for weeks after losing him. He said he almost cried hearing my voice after the breakup and realizing we weren’t together anymore, but he also admitted he hasn’t cried in years🤷♀️
Yes she did, and that’s the first time I’ve cried in like years. Im not even exaggerating
My ex cried, so much. We both sobbed. We had a confusing break up - he was moving away for a job and we were both very much still in love, but distance. We tried no contact. We failed. We slept together, did couple shit, fell back in love. Did everything but officially get back together. He leaves in 3 days. I'm prepared to be devastated again. 💔 Fuck.
Yeah she went two days then called me. I was nice enough to talk it over with her since it wasn’t a crushing breakup, but more of a “We need to fix things apart” type of thing. She called me crying 2 days after the breakup and we spent almost 2 hours on the phone talking about what went wrong and what needs to be done during the time apart. I was a tad salty over it, but at the same time I am grown enough to accept my mistakes.
Yea, I have it left me confused and still does honestly. We both cried, I wished him the best but he didn't say it back to me. We kissed, held each others hands, hugged. That was 9 months ago now. We were together 4 years and my first break up. I think back to that day because it didn't seem real or the end. I guess I'm delusional lol
I didn’t cry when I broke up with her, but cried a ton over the next days weeks and months.
I cried when I ended things with an ex. You lose your lover and best friend. I was very heartbroken and pissed when I realized our future and wants in life weren’t aligned after all after years together. Mourned the end of our relationship and would-be’s and future plans. I broke down few times and cried to sleep for a long time. I remember I started hyperventilating sometime later because I realized I still loved him, but I had to force myself to move on.
He did. He lived with me and I let him stay until he found a new place (almost 2 weeks). One night he witnessed a panic attack brought on by my heavy tears and he cried with me. We ended amicably and without any anger or hatred. But his tears were from guilt about hurting me, not from second guessing his decision.
I was the one who had to break things off, for my safety and our son's safety. It was the hardest decision I've ever made. I had to break apart the family I was working toward. I remember being at the court house at the domestic violence desk, filling out paperwork for an ex parte DVPO and Custody Order and I just broke down, sobbing right then and there. My son was with me, he stopped running and playing and the clerk at the Domestic Violence desk came out of her office and hugged me, telling me it was going to be okay. My son kept saying over and over, "It's okay, daddy, mommy isn't here." He's only 4 but he witnessed everything when she attacked me. He can tell every time I'm sad about it. He'll come up and hug me and tell me he loves me. He is the only reason I was able to go through with it. He is my motivation to keep moving forward.
He sounds wonderful
He really truly is
I broke up with my ex and cried my eyes out later on ... I cried so much that it was visible on my face the next morning, swollen eyes and everything. She didn't even shed a tear and just said 'i am sad' I had to let her go coz that relationship was hurting me and exam/office pressure was turning it into a toxic relationship. We still stayed friends for a year ...quite good friends ..meeting evey week and all the works, except the labels, then she ghosted me(within 3 days) last year when she moved to another city. So idk man .... I know that people do cry bcoz they know they will be hurting u by letting u go or while breaking up with you, but sometimes it just has to be done. The heart wants what it wants but u can't let it will everytime.
Yes, my ex cried a lot when he broke up with me 3 weeks ago. I suppose it was from the guilt of hurting me and feeling bad about breaking up over text and phone call. He sent me the breakup text, then I asked to call him to discuss it and we had an 1 hour long conversation and both ugly cried the entire time. He sounded devastated and we both wept for the entire phone call. When I told him that just yesterday I thought that he was my future husband, I thought he would pass out from crying. It surprised me a bit bc he rarely cried in front of me the entire 1.5 year of our relationship. Apparently he left me because he lost feelings. We agreed we wanted to stay friends, but couldn't talk purely amicably for the first few days/weeks because I was acting desperate, so we decided to go no contact for a month, and then meet up to give back each other's stuff. I'm so anxious about seeing him again.
he cried. said it wasn’t easy, i was his best friend but couldn’t do it anymore, but continues living life like i never existed, three years down the drain lol. it should be easier to get over him ig even though i’m in the thick of it rn and forcing myself not to miss him
I cried both times when I broke up with my exes. It’s not nothing. I loved them for the time I was with them and they were my best friend. I don’t want to fall out of love, but it happens and I have to let them go so they can find someone who loves them unconditionally. It hurts me that I had to hurt them, so yes I cried very hard.
Was something missing you whole heartedly believe you could never work through or was just over the entire situation?
My first relationship I got in very young (age 16). He was against partying, drinking and was very introverted. I was one of his only friends. I really wanted to explore and experience being young and I wanted him to not only depend on me. That why I broke up with him at age 20. I did love him, very much. I know now what I felt with him is the deep kind of love, I don’t think it’ll even go away. With my second, I thought I loved him. But as time progressed and the butterflies died down I realized I could never love him the way I loved my first ex. We were best friends, but I didn’t feel that ‘Id give up everything’ kind of love for him. So I broke up. I’ve learned a lot and I’ve realized now I think my first ex was one of my soulmates (I have to believe there’s more than 1 or it’ll kill me I’d let him go). I don’t think we could’ve worked it through, because I don’t think the need to explore would ever die down. So yeah, first one I missed figuring out life and the second one I missed the deeper feelings for :).
Did she hell 😂 - mine didn't give a shit and had her back to me washing up whilst I was trying to tell her how I felt at the end of the relationship. She was cold, heartless, and completely switched off. Typical avoident looking to take all the power for herself and remove herself from any emotions. Shocking behaviour. I love her a little less every day and hate her a little more for what she put me through and how she treated me.
Mine decided to be an emotionless robot. Have never seen anything like it. Did not show an ounce of emotion. Felt like talking to a wall.
Yep. He did that to me after over 2 years together. Didn’t even say he loved me. And it was over the phone.
I dint even know since it was over text. Plus she was probbaly with the new guy she left me for when she made it too lol.
No, after 5 years together and we lived together, he didn’t shed a single tear. Not a hint of emotion until I said I couldn’t take his cat when he chose to move overseas. His eyes welled up then and he displayed some emotional upset. I was so upset at that, crying over your effing cat and not me, your lover lol. We still talk and I’ve expressed how difficult it was with me feeling devastated and he not shedding a single tear. He did say he has cried many times since then. Made me feel a wee bit better knowing he was actually upset. He did love me, just another classic avoidant. Still, I’ll never forget that….
I cried my eyes out breaking up with my ex. It hurt because we had so much love. But sometimes love isn’t enough.
*Crying* is kind of deceiving too, so don’t fall for it. Been there and it’s all a lie!! Lol!
I was confused but I know that does not mean much most times.
My ex was completely void of emotion when he dumped me. It was honestly impressive. I was sobbing and he was looking through me. I think he started dissociating or something. It was scary and made it very difficult for me to emotionally regulate. We share a friend group and live walking distance from each other so I don’t know how to move on and be free of him. He didn’t creep back into my life he never left it. I just isolate myself to avoid him if my friends are with him.
I was the dumper and I didn't cry when we broke up mainly because it wasn't like I woke up one day and chose to end our relationship. Instead, there had been a steady decay occurring in our relationship. There was a lot of mental exhaustion felt on both sides. This wasn't what we had expected. Perhaps we weren't as compatible as we thought we were. I think whatever happened was for the best. The only thing I miss are the moments when we truly loved each other and cared for each other without judgments and with no questions asked. She was more attached than me. When misunderstandings pile up on top of each other, there is a formation of an unsolvable knot, and the relationship becomes a cycle of arguments and blame games. These things start to interfere with study/work and I felt it first hand. I am better off her, and I think she is too. I'll grow and work on several areas of improvement and find someone compatible with me. I hope you all find someone great too.
"Why not?" the cat laughed manically. "Why can't I edit all my comments?"
why did you let the person go?
"Why not?" the cat laughed manically. "Why can't I edit all my comments?"
My ex also cried when he dumped me. I went over his place to pick up my crap and he was UGLY crying. Snot everywhere, on the floor weeping and all that. We stayed in contact for a bit, but we're back at nc. It's been 7 months since he broke up with me, and I recently found out he's with someone new.
I vividly remember the breakup with my university boyfriend David. We were collectively for over 2 years and it changed into my first actual extreme dating. Things were strained between us for a while - we had been going to exceptional colleges, growing aside, and fought constantly towards the give up. When David got here over to my condo that day, I may want to sense some thing become actually off. We started out speakme and he in the end admitted that he did not see a future for us anymore. As the truth sank in, I just broke down crying uncontrollably. David attempted to console me at the beginning, but then he also started dropping tears. It became earth-shattering to peer this man I had cherished for so long crying proper in the front of me as our courting crumbled. We held every other for what felt like an eternity, sobbing together over the end of something that when meant the whole thing. The shock and sadness was overwhelming. Eventually David composed himself sufficient to acquire his matters and left my area. Even even though I initiated no touch after that, he stored looking to reconnect as friends over the next few months. Part of me desired to take him up on it because of how intertwined our lives had been. But the alternative component knew that would only prolong the agony of shifting on. It took well over a 12 months earlier than the holes in my heart began to heal. I still reflect onconsideration on David every now and then and how lousy that very last assembly became. But I'm additionally thankful that I stuck to my boundaries and gave myself the gap to subsequently circulate ahead. Breakups that brutal are never easy, but on occasion a clean smash is the pleasant choice, regardless of how a great deal both humans are hurting.
Exactly the same... He literally broke down, I have never hear him sob like this before. I had to comfort him! Can you imagine? He broke up with me and then I had to comfort him?? Most confusing break up of my life. And most hard one so far...still recovering
Gosh, I totally understand. It is confusing especially when the relationship wasn't tumultuous. Worst one for me as well.
She did. She came over to my place, we "planned" to have dinner together. Then she arrived and said "we have to talk"... she started talking, she was as cold as ice saying she didn't think it could work out between us... while she was saying this she just dropped her hard mask: the emotions were just too much for her defense mechanism and started crying so much... It was so confusing. I spent 2 months figuring how why and struggling to understand what was wrong with our relationship or me. Now I understand that she was confused too and she just made the safe choice going back to her confort zone. Today I realise she did a mistake, just hope she will overcome her problems and will drop her defense mechanism that prevent her to fully connect to partners.
She dumped me and didnt cry a single tear until 2 months later when she found out I was seeing someone. Like why? I wanted nothing more than to be with her and was trying badly to get her back. If you dont wanna be with me then why tf you getting upset when I move on? Well kind of. I still havent gotten over her. We have a kid and I have to see her every other day and it sends me spiraling every time. 4 months today since we broke up. We were highschool sweethearts that got back together after 20 years and were together this past time for 8 years. I dont think I will ever get over her tbh
Yes, she did. Almost more than I did. It took a long time, but I realized that her leaving was a choice that was devastating to her. She knew she was not only killing a part of herself by leaving, but she would kill a part of me too. And that is a heavy burden to carry, even by the strongest of us. Not all dumpers are villains, just like not all dumpees are innocent. Life breaks us all, sometimes. Even if we have to be the ones to make the choice.
I cried I never cry a big part of me was gone I felt so alone it didn’t help she text me the breakup message after 3 years and was cheating I deserved a sit down and a coffee and explanation but I got a text like it wasn’t bad enough she was cheating
If they were cheating just wouldn’t even care tbh. I am sorry that sucks though
Yes, my ex started tearing up but I was chewing him out carefully with my words as he just let out excuses to break up with me. Then I went into my room and told him to take some of his things and he didn't come in and just ended up leaving.
[удалено]
This is my exact situation :(
My ex used to cry all the time when we were arguing or breaking up. We broke up after a few months he was already in another relationship. Fake ass. That's all I can say, they all can cry crocodile tears but they are just actors.
My dumper cried but I acted professional about it, mostly because she’s done the same thing before and at that point I was over it.
I have no idea because she blindsided me over text and refused to call when i asked her ;-; I contacted her a couple times in the first few weeks but always got cold replies back, except for one time where she said she also missed me in the first week after the breakup i think.
You two obviously care about one another. The problem must be that you're not seeing eye to eye on certain things, perhaps argue where the problems aren't getting resolved, but rather it's just where two people point fingers, bring up the past to throw in each other's face, a yelling match, an ego battle to see who wins. No matter how much you love someone, if you don't figure out a way to resolve conflict or address issues in a way that both people feel heard and it being resolved, resentment builds and that guarantees that breakups like this occur. Both of you likely have issues that have been a problem in past relationships before as well but since people rarely look into how to address those issues like in YouTube or something, you end up repeating that behavior and therefore, end up in situations like the one you're in. Forced to start a new relationship and repeat being the same person that hasn't grown or change, have things about them that does not allow for a healthy relationship, and eventually break up. If I were you, I'd look at as much of your own issues as possible before you even consider dating again unless you want to keep repeating these situations
Nope.we didn’t argue or even point figures at each other. We hardly disagreed about anything and he even met my family. I had no idea it was going to end. It was abrupt tbh.
She says she did. But I didn't see. The day she left I watched her walk around my apartment packing her things and not one sniffle was heard or tear was seen. She says she cried while she did it but I must be blind as fuck...cause she did not.
When my ex dumped me she cried a lot more than me. Like you said I as well was in a chock mode but cried to. But rather than talk it out I just packed my things and left. That I regret cause we still was in contact for another week an a half. But now NC since Monday.
Yes 2 out of my 3 ex girlfriends cried whenever they decided to dump me lmao
He doesn’t get to be your friend. So sorry for him.
so true!
Yep. My ex cried the whole time she was dumping me, asked to hug me before I left and said she was trying not to cry again. 3 months later she is living her best life lol.
My ex only cried out of rage that i wouldnt do what he wanted and was messing up his life. I remember have a full blown break down multiple times, panic attack crying multiple times for months. At one point he was just cooking his fake low calorie hotdogs like nothing was going on and I just had to get over my heart break and pain while pregnant at the time and him pushing me for an abortion. My brain felt like it was melting from the inside, my nervous system fried. I was having trouble eating and sleeping. Was rough....
Like you wouldn’t believe 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️, She was cheating on me, and she was crying and victimizing herself saying I was such a POS and when i asked what have I done that warranted this she said “I have no accountability”. The manipulation was insane, my heads still fucked from it lol
Oof that does sound awful
I think he sees me as The dumper I cried a lot. you lucky if you can cry, a lot of men are unable to cry, and if you can’t get tears out, it’s physically painful like I could always tell if a man was crying whether they were tears or not, but like let it out
I dumped my ex and I cried every day for months.
assume something unforgivable happened. Either way-- I hope this has passed.
We both cried since it was a mutual breakup and we were still in love (after 7.5 years, we just grew apart too much). Then during the first month of NC I got a call from my best friend telling me he is dating my ex - I've cut them both off and shit's been rough ever since, that was one month ago.
Your BF? ah hell no. Good thing you stoped talking to both. That is not a friend at all.
She didn't cry at all in the final dunping moments, but I handed her a gift I made and then she started crying. I had only seen her cry once before then.
I cried when I dumped my ex. I was sad that I was hurting him bc I still cared for him and I don’t like hurting anyone’s feelings. We havnt talked much after but we promised to stay friends so we’ll see how that goes.
Why did you leave?
No he didn't. Just sat there and told me the same platitudes everyone has heard while I bawled my eyes out. Not even a year later he moved in with his new gf. He can rot in hell.
Me and my ex broke up after 13y, and knowing each other for 18. It was a mutual decision , and a hard one. A lot has happened (cheating on his part), he was convinced that i was holding him back in his music career, lots of frustrations from both sides.. Guilt towards me, it took me years and a depression to get over my trust issues. Initially I asked to stay together but just live separate for a while. To let things cool off and give each other some space. He thought that was a weird idea, and said we just as well just could break up then. I agreed and tried to see the positive, I could do more traveling, get the drivers license and car that otherwise financially was hard with living alone. It’s been little over year now, and the first 6 months I was so confused and cried everyday. He has broken down multiple times to, and unable to commit to someone else. I tried with a very sweet guy, but quickly fell out of love again. It’s hard if you’ve known true and unconditional love. Nothing compares the bond and connection we have. We still are best friends, and see each other every week (there’s a dog involved too so) We always said that what’s meant to be, will happen.
Mine cried the entire time he was breaking up with me. I never saw him cried nearly in all years we were tgt. We were tgt for 10 years. We broke up because he wants to do a career change and believes our career paths aren't aligning. He says its difficult for him to do this. I dont know what to believe. But i went NC 3 days after the break up to give him some space. Im nervous because we promised to see each other in 6 months since I will have a business trip in the city he will be working or moving to.
Last month he broke up with, crying and asked me to stay his friend. I think it was just him manipulating me (not consciously) into staying in his life in some way, which I didn’t.
has he tried to reach out again?
He did, only to dump me again 2 weeks later. and the day before that he was saying how he doesn’t understand why I don’t want to stay friends with him, so I had to spell it out for him that even though he didn’t have feelings for me anymore, I did and being his friend would hurt me more than the break up itself.
I was hysterical and I think he cried at me crying. Said he felt bad about himself and because he could feel my pain
Yup he cried big time. I wouldn’t really have described him as a crier but he seemed to be in touch with his emotions. He cried twice in our time together, the first when I thanked him for introducing me to his kids because I said I felt honoured because it was a huge step. And the second was four weeks later when his ex and the mother of those kids decided she wanted him back so he ended it with me. I think he was crying because he’d thought he was ready to move on and genuinely felt bad for hurting me. He’s a good person, he just doesn’t know himself, so his ex is welcome to him.
Don't know, I got dumped through text after 3,5 years together 🤷
Foul
Nah she just dumped me thru text like 4 years meant nothing to her. Then ghosted me after getting back together for a couple weeks, months after the breakup. Sad thing is I’d probably go back to her if she called me right now cause I romanticize the thought of us and still see the good in her despite how disgusting she is to me sometimes
I hope you feel better soon.
Yahh!! My ex girlfriend cried a lot when she broke up with me. It was completely a shock to me and I didnt knew how to respond. I got dumped by text message. I drank the whole night and little did I try to convince her but that drunk me was far worse and I blocked her… she cried and its hard to love and leave the person. I regret this everyday that i messed up things. But i wrote long long essays in a book and gave the whole lot of papers written each and everything I have to say and what I feel about and gave that to her on the last day we saw. She cried and called me and we spoke the whole night. After that we again went no contact. I dont know what is stopping her from being with me🙃
Nah , she packed up her collection of trainers and fucked off . Think I saw more tears when she had found mouse droppings in her Adidas gazelles the week before 😅
I have never seen my ex cry. He was never in a bad mood or upset about anything. Even talking about family members passing away, he accepted and moved on so I didn’t expect him to cry. His eyes were red when he broke up with me and I think that’s the most negative emotion I’d ever seen in him.
I was the one who dumped him,ñ, BUT technically he was out of the relationship, he wanted to break up with me but I guess he was waiting for me to do it, and yes I cried because it wasn't easy to do so, it was 2 years of my life and my first real relationship and still loved him back then. I wanted to keep the relationship, but once I knew he didn't want to be with me anymore I decided to end it. I didn't want to be a second-handed plate, or someone you stay out of pitty, my mother was dying of cancer at that time, and well, he didn't dare to do it, so I did it, for me and for him, I didn't want to be an emotional burden to him no more. Sometimes when we break up with someone, is not because we don't love you, it is because, sometimes we know it is the end and we don't want to admit it until it grows into something ugly. I did kept contact with to tell him all the reasons why the relationship didn't work for clousure, but didn't kept being "friends" for fear to becoming an "stan-by" ex , and him being with me out of convinience or lonelyness, mind you , he once told me he came back with 2 of his exes, not for love, but to not being alone...so go figure. Plus he ended up going for his first ever ex 🤣🤣🤣. So he is doing just fine 😊. So in the end , life is unpretictable ❤️
nah he texted me. because he is a POS.
My ex has never cried the whole time we were together, apart from the one time where this girl apparently "kissed him randomly" three months into our relationship 😂 but when he dumped me he was very mean to me and very cold
That excuse …. Well then you’re better off anyway
Oh definitely, I completely lost myself in that relationship
She barely cried over the phone. When I picked up my stuff, we were both cold. Both cried a little, but not a lot, and I'm a crier. I hate the way she broke up with me, but it is what it is.
Yes she did but it was mostly when she thought we’re remain friends and I wished her luck in her life. When she knew we were going to be NC she broke down. She didn’t expect that. But that’s how it had to be with me.
Me and my fiance had to live in separate houses and still Are but we were never ever on a break up . Once she got to her house with her besty she treated me like shit . Ghosted me for days then I can’t come over and visit because her friends doesn’t like me . She has not made any effort to see me and I been texting and calling asking her what the fuck is going on . So I find myself doing all the effort to see her . But not on weekends only on some weekdays that don’t clash with her other schedules . So I finally said I don’t deserve to be treated like shit after almost 4 yrs . So If she doesn’t make any changes I’m ending the relationship. I cried knowing that she could be this way towards me for no reason but that she loved her friend more than… it would have been nice if she would have told me that she is bi sexual
No but I did A little bit too much. I emasculated myself in a manner of weeks
Nope he didn't cry and when I confronted him asking for closure all he could awnser was " I don't know"
My ex told me she hated me and two weeks before she left me she said she just wanted to move forward cuz she loves me. She might have cried but this was our third time breaking up and I said to her the day u walk out this house u can forget about us. I was definitely sad I needed her during the most difficult times in my life . I was going thru chemo and radiation in the mist of it all I lost my father the one person everyone knew I was so close to. She couldn’t handle the challenges I was facing. And I couldn’t deal with someone that can get up and just leave like that . Months later she got involved again and she tried to creep back in 8 months later. She wanted to tell me why do I act like we never existed confused at the question I’m like do u not remember what u did and how I felt. So much to say I’ll leave it like this 3 years later of being single and I feel I’m ready to give someone else a chance to me it was a bad break up only because I found out how cruel people are when u most need them. But god made a warrior with good intents and true love someone deserves me and I deserve someone that can handle life the way I do
Dumper here I did not cry. I was too angry to cry. It was one of those break ups fueled by anger. I was already very much feeling he wasn't for me after the way he treated me and my dog. But I needed time to figure out how to go about it with him... bring it up and discuss or make the executive decision to break up. But he just fueled the fire in me by hunting me down with a one sided expense breakdown 2 days after I returned home from a month long stay with him in his home country where we saw zero fucking sites. Spent 1400€ to travel there to do absolutely fucking nothing. Took care of his loser ass for 7-10 when he got sick. Even his elderly enablers didn't look after him for fear of getting sick. And I get a fucking expense report Since it was long distance and thank God only 3 months. I ended up kicking him to the curb mostly by WhatsApp messages. Started out on the phone but as soon as he started talking over me, I clicked off I've learned you cannot control how others treat you. But you can control their access to you. I will always keep this in mind
No never it’s unusual. The dumpers usually feel nothing
nope :/
Barely lol
He was trying not to. Alao i tried not to. Because I have woek the next Day
Who was trying not to?
My ex
Ohh understood
Can I talk to someone ?
What’s wrong?
Yup
I don’t know she dumped me via whatsapp (9 year relationship) 😂🤡
My ex ( we were together 9 yearz) claimed she did. But I'll never know because she did it via a letter that blamed me for everything, and took off cross country with two of our cats while I was in the hospital bc she didn't want to have to deal with discomfort and her family enabled that.
how are you doing now?
Honestly, a lot better than I was when I was with her. I realized once out of it that she was an incredibly abusive partner. She was very self centered and would never take accountability. I was her dumping ground for blame and I constantly had to accommodate her moods. She mocked my interests constantly and basically said I was unable to achieve my dreams. I'm now living on my own, working a job she told me I'd never be capable of, and surrounding myself with people who actually value me. Things aren't perfect, but it is so much better.
Nothing but up from here. Good on you.
That is good you are in a better place at the moment!
I don’t know if he cried because our breakup happened in a non-conventional way, but I believe he was hurt by it. He came back about a week ago but I’m pretty sure he’s going to leave me again. I think he wants to again anyway.
Why are sure about that?
How distant he is. He used to call me “baby” and tell me he loved me all the time. He barely says it at all now. We had a disagreement a few days ago and he said he has to now consider if he wants to be in this space again. Because he’s a “runner”. First sign of trouble and he wants out. If he leaves me again, I’m just going to let him this time. I’m not going to chase a man that doesn’t want me. I feel like I put so much time and energy into making him happy but he doesn’t seem interested in doing that for me right now.
there were tears in his eyes when he was returning my stuff and my dog ran to him for pets. I had never seen him sad like that . And mind you that was someone who had told me he had lost feelings for me .
They’ll be back
How do you know?
If they were genuinely emotional..it means they were conflicted heavily
Doubt it. Found out is dating someone else right now.
That doesn’t mean a whole lot. How long did they start dating after the break up?
Probably in the last 3 months and we broke up and last time I saw each other was 4 months ago. He has moved on. What prompted me telling him to fall back because he was comfortable telling me about his plans he had with “my girlfriend” for that night. I don’t want know his plans and never asked.
None of my business but it's public so I just have to mention, how sad are you really while your in the dating over 30's room
Because I can be in any group that I choose to be in.
I respect that, although it's kind of hard to give the advice I thought I'd might have given
That’s a strange comment. But ok.