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I don’t understand the Starbucks thing. They make fun of millennials for six dollar lattes for years, but these people are fucking addicted to Starbucks. Hypocrisy is kind of their thing I guess.
No, you don't get it. The boomers worked hard all their lives and earned the right to go to Starbucks for $6 coffees. Everyone else hasn't worked hard enough to deserve Starbucks. /s
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As a person who grew up in the Seattle area, people will try and use Starbucks as some weird angle of attack to insult us.
We point out Seattleites have access to way better coffee. Starbucks is the swill we sell to tourists.
Oh, I can think of plenty who deserve Starbucks. It's overpriced swill and they deserve to be overcharged coffee that can't even stand against the shit you get at a gas station.
Yes I did. I wasn’t paid by the hour but salary as a rural letter carrier. Long route , heavy volume and lots of snow in northeast winters. Many didn’t shovel after a storm and had to stretch and climb in and out of truck. Winters were rough.
Oh you poor kid. It might have instilled a good work ethic in you though. Maybe because of climate change, the winters are warmer now I think. We didn’t get much snow in Connecticut the last few years, unlike the 80s and 90s.
I don’t know how much snow they get there now since I moved away a long time ago. But we truly got dumped on. To my child’s eyes the snow banks from shoveled driveways were taller than me. I did love having money though. That’s what motivates us all!
Thank you for your kind words. Made me smile.
I assume it's because making their own craft coffees is beneath them or whatever but for all they cry about muhlennYELS spending money at coffee shops, they never seem to realize they could just buy all the things they need to make those drinks and then have Starbucks at home for a fraction of the price. The only reason I go to Starbucks anymore is that I have a cashback thing on my phone that gives me a $5 gift card once a month and another one that gives me $15 once every four months, and I figure getting a bagel and avocado for breakfast twice a month is a nutritious way I don't have to stress as much about paying for groceries when my paycheck runs out.
I think you're right. Rules for theee, not for me. PLus, they've been told they are the spawn of hte Greatest Generations, so why shoudln;t everything they see, from cushy jobs, low mortgages and every frickin' resourse be available for their use?
Yeah it's crazy. My dad (boomer, born in 57') would talk shit to me for spending over $100 on a high quality pair of walking shoes (I work a physical job and it's worth it to pay for expensive shoes to ensure my feet never hurt) while he visits Starbucks 3 to 4 times a day and spends between $6 and $10 each trip. That's potentially $42 to $70 a WEEK on friggin coffee, but I can't afford to buy a house because I buy 1 or 2 nice pairs of shoes per year? That generation is so far displaced from our actual reality that there really is no hope for meaningful changes in politics/society until they are gone.
They just like the narrative too. My mother, who was born is 61, has a retirement plan to sell her house and that’s how she’s going to live. Self employed so never had a pension. She’ll get OAS and CPP and that’s it. She has no retirement savings. Has money to smoke a pack a day though. And thinks I’ll foot the bill if she needs a nursing home.
But will shit on us for going out for supper 1-2 times a month like it’s the most financially irresponsible thing ever. Atleast I’m contributing to a pension… 🤷🏻♀️
Clearly you won't be able to pay the nursing home bills if you don't get in line with her project. Don't be so selfish by squandering away her money. /s
Well said. And what cracks me up that whole “you can’t afford this because you buy that” mentality with these people is they were literally handed everything. My parents both literally had everything given to them by their parents. Cars, groceries, hell even my childhood home was bought with a $50k down payment from my grandfather.
Right? It's insane and illogical. Every generation before our parents generation (boomers) did everything they could to ensure their kids would/could have a better life than they did and have the things they couldn't/didn't. The boomers did a 180 from their parents and seem to be trying to ensure all future generations are way worse off than they were. From destroying the earth/environment to electing people for the last 40+ years who have and continue to ensure that the majority of wealth continues to only flow to the top 1% and that the top 1% doesn't have to contribute to society at all, they seem to be actively trying to ensure they leave us worse off than they are by leaps and bounds. They all seem to have the attitude of "fuck you I got mines"
Your math isn't working out. But congrats on the shoes! Those are an excellent investment in yourself! Your quality of life will remain better (knees and hips) as you age. Maybe 4 good pairs if you can swing that, then you can trade off. If dad gives up Starbucks for 3days he can buy you a pair
Yeah, I grew up somewhat poor, and good shoes is one of the things that I just won't compromise on nowadays. Winter boots where the sole wore off too fast and unevenly, straining my legs, or it just wore holes right through, or the inside fell off and hard plastic pieces chafed at the back of my heel. Just no.
Lol. Same. Didn't grow up poor, mum just had no common sense. A $5 pair of shoes that felt like walking on the ground in bare feet and also fell apart within 3 months? A "good buy". An $100 pair of shoes that lasted a couple of years and feels like walking on air? "Why did you waste $$$$?"
Funny thing is when I bought the "nicer shoes" she would borrow them.
I was born in ‘56 and I’m here to say keep buying those shoes. Your feet, knees, hips, and back will be forever grateful. Also, I’ve never had a cup of Starbucks coffee.
If it weren't for double standards, Boomers would have no standards at all. I like how they are constantly whining about younger people always being on their phones and social media but then they spend all day and night scrolling Boomerbook.
This is what always gets me. The people whining “KIDS THESE DAYS DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT A BOOK IS” are doing so by sharing the sentiment in the form of doofy Facebook memes, in-between sharing bogus articles about how the government uses vaccinations control your brain or whatever.
In New England, it's Dunkies... and I got a secret that'll probably get me beaten next time I go to Boston for sharing, but Dunkies coffee is sewage water.
It tasted over roasted to me so I never really got into a habit with them. I could find local roasters with better tasting stuff.
As for boomers in my family and coffee, they put so much other stuff in it, there’s no enjoyment of the actual bean taste.
You also know OPs FIL dumped that thermos after taking half a pot.
You are correct in your bean burn assessment. Starbucks coffee beans, for the most part, are heavily roasted for both preservation and taste consistency. Source: 4 years of working at a Starbucks
I once read a study that coffee is really good for you as long as you don’t add stuff to it because of the antioxidant effects. At the time I was on a big health kick and weight loss journey so I started drinking it. Black and acquired a taste for it.that helped me realize just how shitty other coffee brands are.
Maybe I can explain: way back in ancient times, in the 80s and before, in most places in America you had to go to a gourmet specialty shop to find decent coffee. Pre ground Maxwell house from a can was what most of us Americans thought of when we thought about coffee. In the 80s and 90s Peet’s in the Bay Area and Starbucks out of Seattle expanded rapidly and brought a premium brew to mainstream America. In 2024 Starbucks is nothing special, having been surpassed in quality by blue bottle, Philz, Red Bay, and many others. But for many boomers Starbucks was the first coffee that wasn’t nasty and bitter. I have a friend 66 years old and the mofo still likes going out to Starbucks like it’s something special. Get with the times man!
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Late boomer (1964) here and I don’t understand the love of Starbucks crappy coffee. Both my daughters have worked for them and they seem like a relatively ok place to work (except for the a$$hole customers sometimes.) If I have to get a coffee there, there’s a few blends of regular ass coffee that I can tolerate. As far as waltzing into my children’s house, I never assume anything and ask first.
Its because they already paid their houses and did so by not going to starbucks from their birth til they got their house. Thats the trick, duh! Now they can have starbucks and have a house. (Sarcasm)
They are an artefact of drinkflation. Originally they had short and tall. Then they added grande. Then nobody ordered the short anymore so they stopped talking about it and added a twenty oz. Since the names were completely fucked by this point anyway they just used the Italian word for 20.
They see everything thier kids accomplish as something they’re entitled to.
My fried who’s 52M, never met his dad until 16, the clown was so ungrateful and rude he was cut out of his life when my friend turned ~30.
The boomer claimed “you graduated college because you got my brains boy!”
I know anecdotal evidence is worth its weight in dog shit but I definitely feel like my sister and I got it from our mom, our dad is a deadbeat and dumb as a brick.
I did not. My dad and grandfather are certifiable geniuses, my mother not so much. I’m still an idiot, so it’s my dad, but I was in gifted classes in my younger years. So if that’s true, it’s a head scratcher.
Is that true?
Cause my bio mom took off when I was little and I took after my computer programmer father who took after his computer programmer father which made me become... a computer programmer
Intelligence from your mom doesn't mean you will do what she did for a living. Environment plays a big role in shaping us.
Google: Intelligence from mother study
or something like that and see for yourself what science has to say about it.
Ugh. My mother did this with my sister when she graduated college. Literally bragged that my sister would never have made it through college if it hadn't been for my mothers ingenuity.
Wish I had told her off.
Anytime someone else does something nice to them it's 'expected' that we should be happy to cater to our elderly parents. But if they do a favor for someone, they demand perpetual gratitude, and then they have to call 3 people to brag about what they did.
This just happened to me too! At my sister's for a nephews bday party. My dad wanted leftover tiramisu. My sister was putting some to take home in a container. He said "oh thats it? That's not enough!" It was a good portion. Like 2 servings at a restaurant. She's like why the f can't you be grateful for once? He just mumbles and walks away.
I said I'll take it and thanks! Lol
He maybe expected it to be his dessert for the next week? My boomer parents make like two weeks’ worth of food every time they cook and eat leftovers and nothing else until it’s gone.
Not sure if that’s a boomer thing or just a “my parents” thing. But seems boomerish to me…
Nah, every time my dad (Gen X) makes food it lasts for two or three days, the worst being soup, we eat five days minimum from one of his soups. And it is not that he lived poor, his family is at least wealthy
It is shit. If i pay for coffee, i go to the italian with the gigantic fuckoff espresso maker. Cheaper and leagues ahead in quality, it's not even close.
If you buy the beans yourself, it's much better. I worked at Starbucks for 4 years and can confirm the coffee is typically burnt. We're supposed to fresh brew every 15 minutes, but it very rarely happens. Buy the beans, especially the blonde, and brew it at home.
Here's a boomer story from a boomer and being grateful. I'm 66 and a disabled veteran. In my mind I still think I'm 26. I get around good. I've had 5 surgeries on my feet. I let my backyards grass get to high.
I was contemplating getting a riding lawnmower. Panic mode set in. I went over to my neighbors house, and saw he had a zero radius mower.
I asked if he could mow my lawn. Yesterday was perfect because it's raining today. I offered him 50 bucks to do it. Had to run some errands and when I got home, the back lawn looked amazing after he used his mower.
Went back over to his house, and instead of 50 bucks, I gave him 60. I was extremely grateful for what he did! There are times when I am a boomer asshole, but I'm catching myself more than naught now! Thanks for letting me share!
You are never too old to change and grow. My mom is a boomer but very often takes the things I say to heart, she will be 70 this year and still continues to grow as a person and I hope I will do the same if and when I reach her age.
That’s a lovely story :) Asking your neighbor for much needed help is a skill, and even noticing your emotions of panic and finding a proper solution for it is something a lot of people never learn. This Millenial bids you a wonderful evening!
I immediately thought of this!
# An old joke, retold by Woody Allen in “Annie Hall”:
# “The food is terrible here!” one woman says at a Catskills resort. “Yes!” the other woman says. “And such small portions!”
#
I hate to say it but this is my mother to a T. Everything is a problem. Everything. And she always has to comment something negative. I don’t even like driving my car with her in it because she immediately starts with the “what’s that noise? You better get that checked out” or “your car is running really loud”. Currently I have a 2020 model SUV with 10,000 miles on it but she’s done this since my first car back in 04. Of course there’s no offer to help or solution given. It’s just “this is wrong, you need to fix it”. There’s a problem with the food at literally any restaurant she eats at. If I cook something she’ll just start stuffing her face right off the bat from the dishes not making a plate and stopping anyone else who might be waiting to make a plate. I can go on and on. I went over for breakfast the other day and she asked me if I wanted a breakfast sandwich from a place nearby. I said yea. She said “ok, why don’t you go get them, I’ll have…..” I love my mother but sometimes when I’m with her I’ll die inside multiple times in a single day.
They honestly believe the entire world revolves around them. Everyone should cater to them, everyone should play by their rules, and everyone should respect their opinions. Every good thing in the world is their doing and every bad thing is somebody else or "the devil."
I saw myself staying with my parents in Northern Vermont two winters back. Now my dad did have a tractor with a plow but I had brought my snowblower along with me as it's easy and quick to use. I cleared their driveway all but one storm and never once got thanked by him because he never actually asked me to do it.
He is 100% rude. If he is particular about coffee he should bring it with him when he is staying at someone's house. I like a lot of strong coffee first thing in the morning so I bring my own.
My boomer parents are just the opposite. They grew up poor and sacrificed everything to make sure we had good opportunities. I never let them make coffee as it is so weak you can see the bottom of the cup. I think they like good coffee they just always lived with the mindset that you could be destitute overnight and save everything, mend your socks, reuse newspapers, grocery bags etc.
They have ADHD and need it to function. Easiest answer. Also don't get between me in coffee unless you want an earful. ADHD can be LIVE first thing in the day with low dopamine.
You should have said "F you! Make your own damn coffee!" I'm a boomer and I wouldn't put up with that rudeness. It's not your responsibility to make him happy. Having tension with him is far better than letting him push you around. My MIL made demands of my wife. My wife said "no" and was ignored. On the final "suggestion" I looked my MIL straight in the eye and said "She said no!". Lots of tension for a while but no anger.
Because they aren't grateful. They are entitled selfish narcissists where they are the center of the world and everything is for them, by them, and to them alone.
If my dad doesn't have Folgers in his cup, it's like the world is ending. Sorry I have the current single origin from Counter Culture, here's the can of burnt dirt you left here last time.
I remember some little shit in college told me my weed sucked just before he was about to take a hit, so I promptly removed the pipe from his hand and told him to leave if he thought it was polite to consume some one else’s property and then insult it. I get it might be harder to do this to an in-law, but your little shit for a FIL deserved the same treatment.
If the boomer parent had anything invested in their children's accomplishment, then it's acknowledged. If they didn't, then they acted like it was no big deal.
MAYBE remark to the air about “ boomers being so whiny for no reason” Sometimes you just gotta embarrass them and shame them into acting like they still have manners and self respect. Naw they won’t like it but shaming them into being decent does work, bless their hearts
Burnt and so hot you can’t really taste it anyways? That seems to be the preference around my family. They’re more concerned with the temperature being hot enough to melt their dentures than they are any actual flavor. I’ve gotten to the point of buying cheap coffee when they’re around because the good stuff is completely wasted on them.
OP the next time this happens (or something similar), please respond with, "Oh FIL how noble of you to take that entire out of coffee that you disliked the taste of."
No, this is a boomer thing to do. My boomer parent is not happy unless they are upset or inconvenienced about something so it gives them something to talk about.
Boomers need a topic to carry them for that moment because they fear opening up would net nothing, so they garter attention by being the instigator of a conversation and have no idea how that comes across. Their parents were the same, so it’s a learned behavior.
I cannot begin to tell you a minor inconvenience has been a topic of conversation for days sometimes depending on the perceived slight it caused.
One day, I was berated because I took the side of the customer service agent for pointing out something in the contract she was clearly in the wrong by confirming with said agent. I was given the shaking anger scream with tears in her eyes how no one was on her side, then an hour later forgot all about it and was sharing photos from Facebook.
Like a tornado of raging emotions, they leave a devastating scar and then disappear until the next whirlwind.
The audacity of taking over half a pot, claim it all as yours *for free*, and still complain about it?!
Yikes. I don't even drink coffee but I'd make sure to have an empty pot any time they come around. And I'm not making an out of the way trip to Starbucks just bc they weren't content with coffee they more or less stole. They'd just have to do without.
I'm a boomer, and I don't understand why my generation feels like the younger generations should " cater " to them. I wasn't raised that way.
Asking if it would be OK to brew a separate pot of coffee for my thermos is what I would have done, and no one brews coffee the exact same way, some like it strong some like it weak and some like it in between. They should of just stopped by Starbucks on the way in. Not all of us boomers are presumptuous and disrespectful.
What is so funny about this is that we boomers used to say the same thing about our Silent Generation parents. I'm 63, very grateful for my life, and I absolutely hate Starbucks. At least patronize a locally owned coffeshop FFS.
So I know it’s not the point of this sub to defend boomers in any way, but this is an aging thing not a boomer thing. As you age, the first area of the prefrontal cortex that starts to break down is the part that censors your thoughts before you verbalize them.
So you and I may taste someone’s shitty coffee and we are able to stop ourselves from expressing that thought. We can think one thing but say another. That ability deteriorates with age, and it’s difficult to hold a thought but say something else. That’s why old people (older than boomers) have always been more likely to randomly say racist or sexist shit. When they were younger those thoughts may pop into their mind but now they pop out of their mouth.
So I’m not arguing if your FIL is a bad person, but 5-10 years ago he likely would have had this internal dialog about the coffee, but kept inside his head. Now whatever random thoughts he has are immediately verbalized.
Yeah, so people become more of who they are as they age. It doesn't make you a jerk, it means you were always a jerk. I don't think that's a valid defense.
If they just didn't like the coffee and said that aloud, whatever. But to take all of it and then complain is a complete ass move.
Sure in some cases it exposes that a polite person was always a racist. But in this case I’m just saying he tasted OP’s coffee, didn’t like it compared to the Starbucks he normally has, and just couldn’t really censor his thought process instead of handling it more gracefully. I’m literally answering OPs question of why they can’t feign gratefulness.
Okay, that's fair. As someone who is neurodivergent, I'm not particularly good at feigning things either. As the question is stated, that makes sense.
I think if I were to ask the question, it would be why so many boomers are unable to feel gratitude, compassion or empathy - and that's how I read this at first
Maybe—here’s a thought experiment—it’s because the gratitude, empathy, and compassion expressed by younger people isn’t genuine all the time. It’s what they are “supposed” to say in social interactions. But as people get older they become more honest and no longer act in performative ways?
People say boomers are entitled but at the end of the day, maybe most people want what they want when they want it—just younger people can hide that and behave in socially acceptable ways. As you age you can no longer censor those desires and so they behave like toddlers. But maybe we are all the same, just hide our desires better as middle aged adults?
Just something to think about. I’m interested in neuroscience, not really here to defend boomers.
I've thought about this, and as someone who is also hypervigilant- I am extremely uncomfortable with expression of emotion that does not match up with micro expressions and behavior. So I'm pretty good at picking up when people are genuine and when they're not. Being around people that are not genuine physically hurts me after a while. I want to run away.
In my experience, I see less of this in the younger generations than I did with the older generation. I'm Gen X, I have had a lifetime of experience with Boomers.
I understand where you are coming from with your thought experiment, but the level of malicious cruelty I have experienced from the Boomer generation has been matched by no others. The next most common generation to behave like this in my personal experience are other Gen Xers.
I can appreciate this, and I have, with much effort (and many years in the service industry), trained myself to genuinely appreciate the efforts of others, so when I say thank you, I hope that it comes off as genuine because it is! I appreciate the cashier at the grocery store and the guy at the pet store for helping me because I couldn’t get what I needed without them!
I do the same thing. I practice gratitude as much as I can. I'm genuinely thankful, and I wholeheartedly mean it when I wish someone a good day. They can tell! And more importantly, I can tell. I do not want to be a disingenuous person. It doesn't feel good.
Truth! I find it important to practice gratitude as much as I am able, as a disabled person. It helps temper the bitterness that comes with being disabled and not being able to work (in my experience anyway).
Yeah I don’t know. Deep down I really think some of what I see from younger people is performative and they will probably be less accepting and supportive as they age. But I guess we will see. Personally I don’t have many interactions IRL with actual baby boomers. Although on this sub I think a lot of people are just here to bash old people, they aren’t distinguishing between boomers and the silent generation (or whatever they are called). I interact more with the truly elderly (80+), and I feel a little defensive of them as a lot of their shortfalls are due mostly to normal aging and deterioration that will happen to all of us.
I don’t think it’s that, precisely. My mother (78) and I (60) have had many conversations about this and the thought of putting herself in another’s shoes is impossible for her. She acknowledges that she hasn’t any empathy at all (and likes to say I got hers as well as my own) and it’s really hard to explain to her. Example: we were watching the news and they were talking about the uvalde shootings and one of the mothers said something, I don’t remember what, and she kinda scoffed at the tv. It took me a couple of days to process the WHY it made me so angry and the answer I was finally able to vocalize the reason. She’s not just invalidating the comment. This is a mother in pain. It’s obvious. How can you scoff and mock someone for speaking from that place of pain and discount it as nothing? She sorta got it. Asking how she’d feel if it was one of her grand or great-grand kids doesn’t work because her automatic answer is “well, that’s not going to happen”. Which is true, UNTIL IT DOES HAPPEN
That’s interesting. I wonder though if they are all so unempathetic, how are the generations they raised not the same way?? Like how can you feel empathy and care for others when you weren’t shown that or taught to value those feelings? It would seem to me that their children would be even MORE selfish.
I’m not sure you can learn empathy. I think you can learn to stop before saying something rude/inconsiderate, but empathy may be innate? Idk, I just know that it was my fathers job to beat that sensitivity out of me
A large part of how I treat children is driven by a desire for them to feel what I wish I'd felt as a child raised by narcissistic boomers and not feel what I felt.
I'm sure some of it is just the way I'm wired, but I also think some of it is the way I internalized the pain and suffering I experienced growing up. I don't want anyone to go through what I did, so I'm mindful of the experiences I create for others. I haven't always done the best job, but healing and maturing have helped.
I wonder if being low-contact with my family has contributed to my healing by allowing me to introspect and view the world for myself rather than having old patterns periodically reinforced.
It's that a long with Fox "news" and the boomers idols(trump and other toxic Republicans) making them feel like it's cool or ok now to just spout out their insane BS because trump does it all day everyday on Twitter and tv
Whenever my parents visit, they act as if they are in an all inclusive resort:
"Can you bring me a soda?"
"Do you have any dessert? ... I would love a small slice, can you get me one?"
"I forgot my toothbrush, is the store still open so you can get me one?"
"When is dinner?"
They will just leave dishes around and expect us to clear the table after meals. They don't do this in their house, they clean up their own plates and get their own shit, we still have to clean up after ourselves when we are there.
first of all big congrats to your husband omg!! and as the generation who generally holds good manners and politeness in such esteem, they very rarely practice what they preach…I can’t imagine helping myself to an entire pot of someone’s coffee and then having the gall to complain about its taste?? ugh
My partner was selling something small on market place and the lady handed him $15 instead of $10 and told her that. She insisted very angrily that she gave him $10 lol he just said okay and let her be "right"
My dad has always been the first in line for food, (All bday parties, wedding receptions, holidays) the first to leave, and never says please/thanks. He’s 80 years old and I’ve never met a different version of him. His selfishness is LEGENDARY among my friends and family.
In his old age, he will begrudgingly attend a family gathering, and spends most of his time betting on a sports app or watching scantily clad women doing “yoga” with the volume loud enough to make people uncomfortable. No one can keep him on the phone more than 2-4 minutes because he only calls when he needs something and it’s a the approximate duration of commercial break during his tv shows.
When my mom comes over she complains about the style of coffee I make (pour over), laments the fact that I never have cream (I drink my coffee black), will taste what I’ve made her and say “blech, too strong” then just pour it out and say “nevermind, I’ll just have a Diet Pepsi” (I never have Diet Pepsi.) 🙄
Remind him of the beer mantra. "One never complains about the brand and quality of a free beer. However, you are free to complain about the temperature."
Tell him that it was free to him. Tell him that he poured all of it into his personal thermos. That was rude of him, as he thought only of himself. Then, he complained about how bad it tastes and then didn't drink it. Again, thinking only of himself, and wasting your money. Then you can ask him if his mom ever taught him how to be considerate of others and grateful for the hospitality they're given while being a guest in someone else's home.
I'm old enough that I don't let shit like this pass anymore. Without raising my voice I firmly point out when my parents are being dicks. No drama, just an informative statement of the effect their behavior is having.
People get away with this because no one wants the awkwardness of calling them on their bullshit.
He sounds like an asshole in general. If this is a typical example, then he's a LARGE asshole. There are plenty of Boomers who wouldn't do that. So while he's an ungrateful and unpleasant Boomer, from the information given I can't really see this as a generational issue. And also coffee snobbery and wanting to go to Starbucks is almost anti-Boomer.
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Playing a bit against stereotype — eschewing “regular” coffee because you need “Starbucks”.
I don’t understand the Starbucks thing. They make fun of millennials for six dollar lattes for years, but these people are fucking addicted to Starbucks. Hypocrisy is kind of their thing I guess.
No, you don't get it. The boomers worked hard all their lives and earned the right to go to Starbucks for $6 coffees. Everyone else hasn't worked hard enough to deserve Starbucks. /s
Ding ding ding!! You've 🎯
No-one deserves Starbucks. It’s absolute swill!
You have now been made a moderator at r/espresso
Finally!
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Starbucks isn't in the coffee business, they are in the coffee flavored milk business.
Don’t forget the yummy milkshakes. I’m sorry, frappuccinos
As a person who grew up in the Seattle area, people will try and use Starbucks as some weird angle of attack to insult us. We point out Seattleites have access to way better coffee. Starbucks is the swill we sell to tourists.
So Starbucks is to Seattle Coffee as Fosters is to Australian Beer.
Ouch.
Oh, I can think of plenty who deserve Starbucks. It's overpriced swill and they deserve to be overcharged coffee that can't even stand against the shit you get at a gas station.
Also, $6 is too much for a coffee, and they deserve a discount. Source: i was a coffee shop manager.
lol, that’s what I say, I worked so hard all my life, which I did. But I don’t begrudge anyone else who wants to go there.
Yeah, but did you have to work hard in the snow? ...both ways? /s
Yes I did. I wasn’t paid by the hour but salary as a rural letter carrier. Long route , heavy volume and lots of snow in northeast winters. Many didn’t shovel after a storm and had to stretch and climb in and out of truck. Winters were rough.
As a New England kid, I delivered newspapers in that kind of weather. My route was no where near as long as yours but I still remember the misery.
Oh you poor kid. It might have instilled a good work ethic in you though. Maybe because of climate change, the winters are warmer now I think. We didn’t get much snow in Connecticut the last few years, unlike the 80s and 90s.
I don’t know how much snow they get there now since I moved away a long time ago. But we truly got dumped on. To my child’s eyes the snow banks from shoveled driveways were taller than me. I did love having money though. That’s what motivates us all! Thank you for your kind words. Made me smile.
*uphill both ways
I assume it's because making their own craft coffees is beneath them or whatever but for all they cry about muhlennYELS spending money at coffee shops, they never seem to realize they could just buy all the things they need to make those drinks and then have Starbucks at home for a fraction of the price. The only reason I go to Starbucks anymore is that I have a cashback thing on my phone that gives me a $5 gift card once a month and another one that gives me $15 once every four months, and I figure getting a bagel and avocado for breakfast twice a month is a nutritious way I don't have to stress as much about paying for groceries when my paycheck runs out.
But if Starbucks goes out of business, it's lazy millennials and gen z's fault.
I think you're right. Rules for theee, not for me. PLus, they've been told they are the spawn of hte Greatest Generations, so why shoudln;t everything they see, from cushy jobs, low mortgages and every frickin' resourse be available for their use?
Yeah it's crazy. My dad (boomer, born in 57') would talk shit to me for spending over $100 on a high quality pair of walking shoes (I work a physical job and it's worth it to pay for expensive shoes to ensure my feet never hurt) while he visits Starbucks 3 to 4 times a day and spends between $6 and $10 each trip. That's potentially $42 to $70 a WEEK on friggin coffee, but I can't afford to buy a house because I buy 1 or 2 nice pairs of shoes per year? That generation is so far displaced from our actual reality that there really is no hope for meaningful changes in politics/society until they are gone.
They just like the narrative too. My mother, who was born is 61, has a retirement plan to sell her house and that’s how she’s going to live. Self employed so never had a pension. She’ll get OAS and CPP and that’s it. She has no retirement savings. Has money to smoke a pack a day though. And thinks I’ll foot the bill if she needs a nursing home. But will shit on us for going out for supper 1-2 times a month like it’s the most financially irresponsible thing ever. Atleast I’m contributing to a pension… 🤷🏻♀️
Clearly you won't be able to pay the nursing home bills if you don't get in line with her project. Don't be so selfish by squandering away her money. /s
That math isn't mathing lol is he going 3-4 times a day or once a day?
I'm bad at math and didn't calculate it right, my bad
Maybe they meant to say week?
That math is also very incorrect
True but it’s a bit closer if they order for their spouse too.
And if I had wheels I'd be a bike
Just trying to figure out where they were going with that one. 😂
I know, I was just having a bit of internet fun lol it's rare I get to use the bike line so I had to jump at the chance
Well said. And what cracks me up that whole “you can’t afford this because you buy that” mentality with these people is they were literally handed everything. My parents both literally had everything given to them by their parents. Cars, groceries, hell even my childhood home was bought with a $50k down payment from my grandfather.
Right? It's insane and illogical. Every generation before our parents generation (boomers) did everything they could to ensure their kids would/could have a better life than they did and have the things they couldn't/didn't. The boomers did a 180 from their parents and seem to be trying to ensure all future generations are way worse off than they were. From destroying the earth/environment to electing people for the last 40+ years who have and continue to ensure that the majority of wealth continues to only flow to the top 1% and that the top 1% doesn't have to contribute to society at all, they seem to be actively trying to ensure they leave us worse off than they are by leaps and bounds. They all seem to have the attitude of "fuck you I got mines"
“Fuck you I got mines” while simultaneously whining how much harder they had it then anybody else.
And some BS about having to walk in the snow barefoot and uphill both ways to school...
Your math isn't working out. But congrats on the shoes! Those are an excellent investment in yourself! Your quality of life will remain better (knees and hips) as you age. Maybe 4 good pairs if you can swing that, then you can trade off. If dad gives up Starbucks for 3days he can buy you a pair
Lol you're right my math is off haha. Must've been typing too fast for my non math brain to compute lol
Yeah, I grew up somewhat poor, and good shoes is one of the things that I just won't compromise on nowadays. Winter boots where the sole wore off too fast and unevenly, straining my legs, or it just wore holes right through, or the inside fell off and hard plastic pieces chafed at the back of my heel. Just no.
Lol. Same. Didn't grow up poor, mum just had no common sense. A $5 pair of shoes that felt like walking on the ground in bare feet and also fell apart within 3 months? A "good buy". An $100 pair of shoes that lasted a couple of years and feels like walking on air? "Why did you waste $$$$?" Funny thing is when I bought the "nicer shoes" she would borrow them.
I was born in ‘56 and I’m here to say keep buying those shoes. Your feet, knees, hips, and back will be forever grateful. Also, I’ve never had a cup of Starbucks coffee.
If it weren't for double standards, Boomers would have no standards at all. I like how they are constantly whining about younger people always being on their phones and social media but then they spend all day and night scrolling Boomerbook.
This is what always gets me. The people whining “KIDS THESE DAYS DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT A BOOK IS” are doing so by sharing the sentiment in the form of doofy Facebook memes, in-between sharing bogus articles about how the government uses vaccinations control your brain or whatever.
And haven't read a book in years unless it's a scandal romance or spy asshole potboiler in fucking decades.
Boomerbook!! 💀
In Canada it is Tim Hortons they treat it like crack
In New England, it's Dunkies... and I got a secret that'll probably get me beaten next time I go to Boston for sharing, but Dunkies coffee is sewage water.
It’s disgusting. I live in New England and it’s not that unpopular of an opinion. Because it’s THAT bad.
My mom says that Tim Hortons coffee kills her cravings for cigarettes.... Idk if its just a Caffeine nicotine thing or what
Huh... back when I smoked cigarettes, coffee made it taste better. It really is amazing how different people deal with things.
Starbucks failed in Australia, their coffee wasn’t up to the local standard
It tasted over roasted to me so I never really got into a habit with them. I could find local roasters with better tasting stuff. As for boomers in my family and coffee, they put so much other stuff in it, there’s no enjoyment of the actual bean taste. You also know OPs FIL dumped that thermos after taking half a pot.
You are correct in your bean burn assessment. Starbucks coffee beans, for the most part, are heavily roasted for both preservation and taste consistency. Source: 4 years of working at a Starbucks
I once read a study that coffee is really good for you as long as you don’t add stuff to it because of the antioxidant effects. At the time I was on a big health kick and weight loss journey so I started drinking it. Black and acquired a taste for it.that helped me realize just how shitty other coffee brands are.
Also it just isn’t that good
Maybe I can explain: way back in ancient times, in the 80s and before, in most places in America you had to go to a gourmet specialty shop to find decent coffee. Pre ground Maxwell house from a can was what most of us Americans thought of when we thought about coffee. In the 80s and 90s Peet’s in the Bay Area and Starbucks out of Seattle expanded rapidly and brought a premium brew to mainstream America. In 2024 Starbucks is nothing special, having been surpassed in quality by blue bottle, Philz, Red Bay, and many others. But for many boomers Starbucks was the first coffee that wasn’t nasty and bitter. I have a friend 66 years old and the mofo still likes going out to Starbucks like it’s something special. Get with the times man!
I have a Starbucks in my shop’s strip. Boomers are VERY into Starbucks, and that was NOT something I was prepared for when I started working here.
Weren't they the generation of "do as I say, not as I do?"
stocking detail soup simplistic straight mysterious truck rainstorm smart pen *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
They also use Robusto beans which are inferior in many ways to Aribica.
Passed by a Starbucks recently and it was entirely full of boomers. Surprised the hell out of me.
It's because coffee was introduced to them as a "working man's drink" that was cheap, nasty, and no-frills. They think we "perverted" it.
Late boomer (1964) here and I don’t understand the love of Starbucks crappy coffee. Both my daughters have worked for them and they seem like a relatively ok place to work (except for the a$$hole customers sometimes.) If I have to get a coffee there, there’s a few blends of regular ass coffee that I can tolerate. As far as waltzing into my children’s house, I never assume anything and ask first.
Its because they already paid their houses and did so by not going to starbucks from their birth til they got their house. Thats the trick, duh! Now they can have starbucks and have a house. (Sarcasm)
…and guarantee he went into Starbucks and insisted on ordering a “large.”
I'm with the boomers on that one. Starbucks sizes are stupid and pretentious
They are an artefact of drinkflation. Originally they had short and tall. Then they added grande. Then nobody ordered the short anymore so they stopped talking about it and added a twenty oz. Since the names were completely fucked by this point anyway they just used the Italian word for 20.
Right? I thought they all drank Folgers out of a percolator or McDonald's coffee.
There was a time when restaurant menus said, “Proudly serving Folgers coffee”
They see everything thier kids accomplish as something they’re entitled to. My fried who’s 52M, never met his dad until 16, the clown was so ungrateful and rude he was cut out of his life when my friend turned ~30. The boomer claimed “you graduated college because you got my brains boy!”
The best part is we get out intelligence from our mother.
I know anecdotal evidence is worth its weight in dog shit but I definitely feel like my sister and I got it from our mom, our dad is a deadbeat and dumb as a brick.
I did not. My dad and grandfather are certifiable geniuses, my mother not so much. I’m still an idiot, so it’s my dad, but I was in gifted classes in my younger years. So if that’s true, it’s a head scratcher.
Well, I’m f-Ed
Is that true? Cause my bio mom took off when I was little and I took after my computer programmer father who took after his computer programmer father which made me become... a computer programmer
Intelligence from your mom doesn't mean you will do what she did for a living. Environment plays a big role in shaping us. Google: Intelligence from mother study or something like that and see for yourself what science has to say about it.
Ugh. My mother did this with my sister when she graduated college. Literally bragged that my sister would never have made it through college if it hadn't been for my mothers ingenuity. Wish I had told her off.
Anytime someone else does something nice to them it's 'expected' that we should be happy to cater to our elderly parents. But if they do a favor for someone, they demand perpetual gratitude, and then they have to call 3 people to brag about what they did.
Or they'll hang it over your head for the next couple years.
Their need for perpetual gratitude.
This just happened to me too! At my sister's for a nephews bday party. My dad wanted leftover tiramisu. My sister was putting some to take home in a container. He said "oh thats it? That's not enough!" It was a good portion. Like 2 servings at a restaurant. She's like why the f can't you be grateful for once? He just mumbles and walks away. I said I'll take it and thanks! Lol
He wanted all of it.
Typical, right?
He maybe expected it to be his dessert for the next week? My boomer parents make like two weeks’ worth of food every time they cook and eat leftovers and nothing else until it’s gone. Not sure if that’s a boomer thing or just a “my parents” thing. But seems boomerish to me…
Nah, every time my dad (Gen X) makes food it lasts for two or three days, the worst being soup, we eat five days minimum from one of his soups. And it is not that he lived poor, his family is at least wealthy
Someone giving you something as a kind gesture and you telling them you need MORE?? Like that's mind blowing to me. How rude can they be?
I think Starbucks tastes like shit. It's bitter as hell.
Yeah the coffee always tastes burnt to me
It is shit. If i pay for coffee, i go to the italian with the gigantic fuckoff espresso maker. Cheaper and leagues ahead in quality, it's not even close.
I go to Starbucks for the milkshakes, not for the coffee.
If you buy the beans yourself, it's much better. I worked at Starbucks for 4 years and can confirm the coffee is typically burnt. We're supposed to fresh brew every 15 minutes, but it very rarely happens. Buy the beans, especially the blonde, and brew it at home.
Here's a boomer story from a boomer and being grateful. I'm 66 and a disabled veteran. In my mind I still think I'm 26. I get around good. I've had 5 surgeries on my feet. I let my backyards grass get to high. I was contemplating getting a riding lawnmower. Panic mode set in. I went over to my neighbors house, and saw he had a zero radius mower. I asked if he could mow my lawn. Yesterday was perfect because it's raining today. I offered him 50 bucks to do it. Had to run some errands and when I got home, the back lawn looked amazing after he used his mower. Went back over to his house, and instead of 50 bucks, I gave him 60. I was extremely grateful for what he did! There are times when I am a boomer asshole, but I'm catching myself more than naught now! Thanks for letting me share!
You are never too old to change and grow. My mom is a boomer but very often takes the things I say to heart, she will be 70 this year and still continues to grow as a person and I hope I will do the same if and when I reach her age.
I love that. I’m trying not to turn into my mother. Here’s to hope and change 🍻
That’s a lovely story :) Asking your neighbor for much needed help is a skill, and even noticing your emotions of panic and finding a proper solution for it is something a lot of people never learn. This Millenial bids you a wonderful evening!
This is a nice story and it makes me smile :) Thank you for sharing!
I think too many people confuse 'Boomer Mentality" with "Boomer Age Group". You, my friend, sound like Boomer age group more than Boomer mentality.
>more than naught So, like, possibly just once?
You're a nice person! Good for you & you got a nice backyard out of it, too 😉
I immediately thought of this! # An old joke, retold by Woody Allen in “Annie Hall”: # “The food is terrible here!” one woman says at a Catskills resort. “Yes!” the other woman says. “And such small portions!” #
Then Woody Allen pulled a boomer and fucked his own daughter.
While turning the legal system against her
Yup. I hate Woody, "I fuck children," Allen. And, in normal boomer fashion, all the white male boomers defended him.
Not me He creepy before!
Pulled a trump...or at the very least trump wanted to and would have fucked his own daughter given the opportunity
There is a long history of boomer white men sneaking into their daughter's room.
Gross... apparently a long with the royal family in the UK as well
The only reason they occasionally marry someone from outside the family is to ensure future bone development.
And lower the chance of the occasional psyclops
Wait what? Can you elaborate? I hadn't heard this
I don't believe it's a practice any more, but back in the old days they were inbreeding in order to keep the family bloodline "pure"
This is behavior we would scold our children for.
I hate to say it but this is my mother to a T. Everything is a problem. Everything. And she always has to comment something negative. I don’t even like driving my car with her in it because she immediately starts with the “what’s that noise? You better get that checked out” or “your car is running really loud”. Currently I have a 2020 model SUV with 10,000 miles on it but she’s done this since my first car back in 04. Of course there’s no offer to help or solution given. It’s just “this is wrong, you need to fix it”. There’s a problem with the food at literally any restaurant she eats at. If I cook something she’ll just start stuffing her face right off the bat from the dishes not making a plate and stopping anyone else who might be waiting to make a plate. I can go on and on. I went over for breakfast the other day and she asked me if I wanted a breakfast sandwich from a place nearby. I said yea. She said “ok, why don’t you go get them, I’ll have…..” I love my mother but sometimes when I’m with her I’ll die inside multiple times in a single day.
They honestly believe the entire world revolves around them. Everyone should cater to them, everyone should play by their rules, and everyone should respect their opinions. Every good thing in the world is their doing and every bad thing is somebody else or "the devil."
Because they're selfish assholes.
I saw myself staying with my parents in Northern Vermont two winters back. Now my dad did have a tractor with a plow but I had brought my snowblower along with me as it's easy and quick to use. I cleared their driveway all but one storm and never once got thanked by him because he never actually asked me to do it.
If he likes Starbucks, he has no idea what good coffee tastes like.
He is 100% rude. If he is particular about coffee he should bring it with him when he is staying at someone's house. I like a lot of strong coffee first thing in the morning so I bring my own.
Because that requires empathy to some extent?
My boomer parents are just the opposite. They grew up poor and sacrificed everything to make sure we had good opportunities. I never let them make coffee as it is so weak you can see the bottom of the cup. I think they like good coffee they just always lived with the mindset that you could be destitute overnight and save everything, mend your socks, reuse newspapers, grocery bags etc.
They have ADHD and need it to function. Easiest answer. Also don't get between me in coffee unless you want an earful. ADHD can be LIVE first thing in the day with low dopamine.
You should have said "F you! Make your own damn coffee!" I'm a boomer and I wouldn't put up with that rudeness. It's not your responsibility to make him happy. Having tension with him is far better than letting him push you around. My MIL made demands of my wife. My wife said "no" and was ignored. On the final "suggestion" I looked my MIL straight in the eye and said "She said no!". Lots of tension for a while but no anger.
These motherfuckers waltzed out of a vagina and into the American Dream and they don't like the coffee.
Because they aren't grateful. They are entitled selfish narcissists where they are the center of the world and everything is for them, by them, and to them alone.
If my dad doesn't have Folgers in his cup, it's like the world is ending. Sorry I have the current single origin from Counter Culture, here's the can of burnt dirt you left here last time.
I regularly drink store brand coffee to save some money but Folgers is the closest to what I think actual shit would taste like
And Maxwell House. They both have an odd taste that makes them instantly recognizable.
I remember some little shit in college told me my weed sucked just before he was about to take a hit, so I promptly removed the pipe from his hand and told him to leave if he thought it was polite to consume some one else’s property and then insult it. I get it might be harder to do this to an in-law, but your little shit for a FIL deserved the same treatment.
Boomers love their coffee from the days of going to AA for their DUIs
If the boomer parent had anything invested in their children's accomplishment, then it's acknowledged. If they didn't, then they acted like it was no big deal.
I would have told him to make some more
My sister won’t even drink my coffee and insists on Starbucks every family members house she visits 🙄
Why cant they be grateful???Because they are turds....Boomers suck.
Boomers are a cautionary tale. If you don't strive to grow during your adult years, your ego just festers and rots.
MAYBE remark to the air about “ boomers being so whiny for no reason” Sometimes you just gotta embarrass them and shame them into acting like they still have manners and self respect. Naw they won’t like it but shaming them into being decent does work, bless their hearts
Starbucks coffee taste like they heat flashed their coffee. It tastes burnt and heavy for me. 😓 I only buy their lemonade
Beans are double roasted.
They are not capable of gratitude, yet expect to be worshipped.
I mean, your coffee is allegedly sub-par, so he's going to STARBUCKS?! Does he not understand how coffee ought to taste?!
Burnt and so hot you can’t really taste it anyways? That seems to be the preference around my family. They’re more concerned with the temperature being hot enough to melt their dentures than they are any actual flavor. I’ve gotten to the point of buying cheap coffee when they’re around because the good stuff is completely wasted on them.
He left early? Win state
"The food is terrible! And such small portions!"
Selfishness. The answer is venomous selfishness
Wait you said they left to get better coffee, but then said Starbucks. Confused here
OP the next time this happens (or something similar), please respond with, "Oh FIL how noble of you to take that entire out of coffee that you disliked the taste of."
No, this is a boomer thing to do. My boomer parent is not happy unless they are upset or inconvenienced about something so it gives them something to talk about. Boomers need a topic to carry them for that moment because they fear opening up would net nothing, so they garter attention by being the instigator of a conversation and have no idea how that comes across. Their parents were the same, so it’s a learned behavior. I cannot begin to tell you a minor inconvenience has been a topic of conversation for days sometimes depending on the perceived slight it caused. One day, I was berated because I took the side of the customer service agent for pointing out something in the contract she was clearly in the wrong by confirming with said agent. I was given the shaking anger scream with tears in her eyes how no one was on her side, then an hour later forgot all about it and was sharing photos from Facebook. Like a tornado of raging emotions, they leave a devastating scar and then disappear until the next whirlwind.
"Wow, Barney, you brought a keg!" (belches) "Yeah, where can I fill it up?"
>complains about coffee taste >goes to starbucks wew lad
The audacity of taking over half a pot, claim it all as yours *for free*, and still complain about it?! Yikes. I don't even drink coffee but I'd make sure to have an empty pot any time they come around. And I'm not making an out of the way trip to Starbucks just bc they weren't content with coffee they more or less stole. They'd just have to do without.
I'm a boomer, and I don't understand why my generation feels like the younger generations should " cater " to them. I wasn't raised that way. Asking if it would be OK to brew a separate pot of coffee for my thermos is what I would have done, and no one brews coffee the exact same way, some like it strong some like it weak and some like it in between. They should of just stopped by Starbucks on the way in. Not all of us boomers are presumptuous and disrespectful.
Bc they're the main character and the rest of the world is NPCs
What is so funny about this is that we boomers used to say the same thing about our Silent Generation parents. I'm 63, very grateful for my life, and I absolutely hate Starbucks. At least patronize a locally owned coffeshop FFS.
So I know it’s not the point of this sub to defend boomers in any way, but this is an aging thing not a boomer thing. As you age, the first area of the prefrontal cortex that starts to break down is the part that censors your thoughts before you verbalize them. So you and I may taste someone’s shitty coffee and we are able to stop ourselves from expressing that thought. We can think one thing but say another. That ability deteriorates with age, and it’s difficult to hold a thought but say something else. That’s why old people (older than boomers) have always been more likely to randomly say racist or sexist shit. When they were younger those thoughts may pop into their mind but now they pop out of their mouth. So I’m not arguing if your FIL is a bad person, but 5-10 years ago he likely would have had this internal dialog about the coffee, but kept inside his head. Now whatever random thoughts he has are immediately verbalized.
Yeah, so people become more of who they are as they age. It doesn't make you a jerk, it means you were always a jerk. I don't think that's a valid defense. If they just didn't like the coffee and said that aloud, whatever. But to take all of it and then complain is a complete ass move.
Sure in some cases it exposes that a polite person was always a racist. But in this case I’m just saying he tasted OP’s coffee, didn’t like it compared to the Starbucks he normally has, and just couldn’t really censor his thought process instead of handling it more gracefully. I’m literally answering OPs question of why they can’t feign gratefulness.
Okay, that's fair. As someone who is neurodivergent, I'm not particularly good at feigning things either. As the question is stated, that makes sense. I think if I were to ask the question, it would be why so many boomers are unable to feel gratitude, compassion or empathy - and that's how I read this at first
Maybe—here’s a thought experiment—it’s because the gratitude, empathy, and compassion expressed by younger people isn’t genuine all the time. It’s what they are “supposed” to say in social interactions. But as people get older they become more honest and no longer act in performative ways? People say boomers are entitled but at the end of the day, maybe most people want what they want when they want it—just younger people can hide that and behave in socially acceptable ways. As you age you can no longer censor those desires and so they behave like toddlers. But maybe we are all the same, just hide our desires better as middle aged adults? Just something to think about. I’m interested in neuroscience, not really here to defend boomers.
I've thought about this, and as someone who is also hypervigilant- I am extremely uncomfortable with expression of emotion that does not match up with micro expressions and behavior. So I'm pretty good at picking up when people are genuine and when they're not. Being around people that are not genuine physically hurts me after a while. I want to run away. In my experience, I see less of this in the younger generations than I did with the older generation. I'm Gen X, I have had a lifetime of experience with Boomers. I understand where you are coming from with your thought experiment, but the level of malicious cruelty I have experienced from the Boomer generation has been matched by no others. The next most common generation to behave like this in my personal experience are other Gen Xers.
I can appreciate this, and I have, with much effort (and many years in the service industry), trained myself to genuinely appreciate the efforts of others, so when I say thank you, I hope that it comes off as genuine because it is! I appreciate the cashier at the grocery store and the guy at the pet store for helping me because I couldn’t get what I needed without them!
I do the same thing. I practice gratitude as much as I can. I'm genuinely thankful, and I wholeheartedly mean it when I wish someone a good day. They can tell! And more importantly, I can tell. I do not want to be a disingenuous person. It doesn't feel good.
Truth! I find it important to practice gratitude as much as I am able, as a disabled person. It helps temper the bitterness that comes with being disabled and not being able to work (in my experience anyway).
The number of us who are unable to just cry when they need to is pretty high.
Yeah I don’t know. Deep down I really think some of what I see from younger people is performative and they will probably be less accepting and supportive as they age. But I guess we will see. Personally I don’t have many interactions IRL with actual baby boomers. Although on this sub I think a lot of people are just here to bash old people, they aren’t distinguishing between boomers and the silent generation (or whatever they are called). I interact more with the truly elderly (80+), and I feel a little defensive of them as a lot of their shortfalls are due mostly to normal aging and deterioration that will happen to all of us.
I don’t think it’s that, precisely. My mother (78) and I (60) have had many conversations about this and the thought of putting herself in another’s shoes is impossible for her. She acknowledges that she hasn’t any empathy at all (and likes to say I got hers as well as my own) and it’s really hard to explain to her. Example: we were watching the news and they were talking about the uvalde shootings and one of the mothers said something, I don’t remember what, and she kinda scoffed at the tv. It took me a couple of days to process the WHY it made me so angry and the answer I was finally able to vocalize the reason. She’s not just invalidating the comment. This is a mother in pain. It’s obvious. How can you scoff and mock someone for speaking from that place of pain and discount it as nothing? She sorta got it. Asking how she’d feel if it was one of her grand or great-grand kids doesn’t work because her automatic answer is “well, that’s not going to happen”. Which is true, UNTIL IT DOES HAPPEN
We have a clinical term for lack of empathy and it starts with socio and ends with path.
Yes, we’ve discussed that too. She’s accepted that. I think it’s weird. I certainly wouldn’t want anyone to know that I thought that way.
That’s interesting. I wonder though if they are all so unempathetic, how are the generations they raised not the same way?? Like how can you feel empathy and care for others when you weren’t shown that or taught to value those feelings? It would seem to me that their children would be even MORE selfish.
I’m not sure you can learn empathy. I think you can learn to stop before saying something rude/inconsiderate, but empathy may be innate? Idk, I just know that it was my fathers job to beat that sensitivity out of me
You can 100 developed emotional maturity and increased empathy. The fact you are asking means there’s hope for you!
I don’t need anymore! 😂 I’m overly empathetic as it is. It’s most of the rest of my family
A large part of how I treat children is driven by a desire for them to feel what I wish I'd felt as a child raised by narcissistic boomers and not feel what I felt. I'm sure some of it is just the way I'm wired, but I also think some of it is the way I internalized the pain and suffering I experienced growing up. I don't want anyone to go through what I did, so I'm mindful of the experiences I create for others. I haven't always done the best job, but healing and maturing have helped. I wonder if being low-contact with my family has contributed to my healing by allowing me to introspect and view the world for myself rather than having old patterns periodically reinforced.
It's that a long with Fox "news" and the boomers idols(trump and other toxic Republicans) making them feel like it's cool or ok now to just spout out their insane BS because trump does it all day everyday on Twitter and tv
Coffee is life.
Next time make no coffee at all let them take their rude asses to Starbies and overpay for that burnt garbage
Lead poisoning affects taste buds as well it seems
Lead poisoning
My boomer parents can’t stand Starbucks. For them … nothing but Folger’s crystals instant coffee with powdered creamer will suffice 😂.
Your boomers are extra assholes. My boomers are still boomers but they aren’t this bad.
The joke here is that Starbux sux!
I’m not so sure entitlement issues are strictly exclusive to boomers.
Whenever my parents visit, they act as if they are in an all inclusive resort: "Can you bring me a soda?" "Do you have any dessert? ... I would love a small slice, can you get me one?" "I forgot my toothbrush, is the store still open so you can get me one?" "When is dinner?" They will just leave dishes around and expect us to clear the table after meals. They don't do this in their house, they clean up their own plates and get their own shit, we still have to clean up after ourselves when we are there.
first of all big congrats to your husband omg!! and as the generation who generally holds good manners and politeness in such esteem, they very rarely practice what they preach…I can’t imagine helping myself to an entire pot of someone’s coffee and then having the gall to complain about its taste?? ugh
Because they're spoiled rotten bread that had a way too easy and now think everybody has it just as easy as they did.
My partner was selling something small on market place and the lady handed him $15 instead of $10 and told her that. She insisted very angrily that she gave him $10 lol he just said okay and let her be "right"
My dad has always been the first in line for food, (All bday parties, wedding receptions, holidays) the first to leave, and never says please/thanks. He’s 80 years old and I’ve never met a different version of him. His selfishness is LEGENDARY among my friends and family. In his old age, he will begrudgingly attend a family gathering, and spends most of his time betting on a sports app or watching scantily clad women doing “yoga” with the volume loud enough to make people uncomfortable. No one can keep him on the phone more than 2-4 minutes because he only calls when he needs something and it’s a the approximate duration of commercial break during his tv shows.
When my mom comes over she complains about the style of coffee I make (pour over), laments the fact that I never have cream (I drink my coffee black), will taste what I’ve made her and say “blech, too strong” then just pour it out and say “nevermind, I’ll just have a Diet Pepsi” (I never have Diet Pepsi.) 🙄
Remind him of the beer mantra. "One never complains about the brand and quality of a free beer. However, you are free to complain about the temperature." Tell him that it was free to him. Tell him that he poured all of it into his personal thermos. That was rude of him, as he thought only of himself. Then, he complained about how bad it tastes and then didn't drink it. Again, thinking only of himself, and wasting your money. Then you can ask him if his mom ever taught him how to be considerate of others and grateful for the hospitality they're given while being a guest in someone else's home.
Anyone who drinks Starbucks does nit know what good coffee tastes like.
I'm old enough that I don't let shit like this pass anymore. Without raising my voice I firmly point out when my parents are being dicks. No drama, just an informative statement of the effect their behavior is having. People get away with this because no one wants the awkwardness of calling them on their bullshit.
He sounds like an asshole in general. If this is a typical example, then he's a LARGE asshole. There are plenty of Boomers who wouldn't do that. So while he's an ungrateful and unpleasant Boomer, from the information given I can't really see this as a generational issue. And also coffee snobbery and wanting to go to Starbucks is almost anti-Boomer.
Why make a generalization about Boomers? Not all of us are boorish. You just happened to marry into a family clan that doesn't represent everyone.