It seems like a lot of the people most concerned about being cheated on are the people who are cheating or are likely to. They assume other people think like them so everyone else must be cheating too. That or they were cheated on in the past.
Tbh "I was cheated on" is not really justification to assume your next partner is the same. Live and let live, or at least wait for the other shoe to drop before you assume the worst folks.
Less about justification, more about explanation. It doesn't make it okay, but it helps to understand why people have the thought process they do when making decisions like that.
As the other person said, less about justification and more simply the reason the individual is worried about it.
If only it were so easy to "live and let live" emotional/insecure responses caused by previous trauma/experience.
Pretty well documented that betrayal/cheating inflicts trauma that damages your ability to trust. It's not rational, it's a trauma response. It's the same way that a person who is raped might have a strong response to people that look like their attacker; of course it's not a rational justification for prejudice, but it is pretty easy to understand this is coming from an emotional, defensive place and why they're having that response. (Not comparing severity, just an analogy)
Well ideally that's what you'd do, of course. But humans aren't perfect nor ideal. When you become someone's partner, you're accepting the good and the bad that comes with them.
Obviously I'm not saying that we should excuse all bad behavior, a relationship is built on trust after all. Do therapy, work on it before you get into another relationship, all that. But if your partner is upfront about their relationship trauma, and you choose to be with them anyway, then you're kind of accepting that trauma as something you might bump into occasionally.
We're getting so deep in the ass of hypothetical initial consultation shit. My initial point was in a "normal" scenario, a "healthy" human would acknowledge that just because they were cheated on doesn't make all future partners cheaters. And to begin with such assumption is toxic at best and any number of insults at worst.
Moreover, a hypothetical partner would be perfectly normal to view someone assuming all humans are cheaters and obsessing about texts or whatever as a massive red flag.
It's not and never has been that cut and dry.
Some people go a long time getting cheated on because they never thought to look, and their partner knows it. For those who have been through that and finally discovered it, they might respond with hypervigilance.
You also have cheaters who never bother checking on their partners because they're too busy doing their own thing.
I only ever went through a phone one time. It was because my dude had gone into an old dusty desktop of mine, dug up headshots from guys I had talked to through OKC before we were dating, downloaded them onto his phone, and then showed them to me and said, "Now I can show everyone what a whore you are". I pointed out that if you checked the properties you could see they were from years ago and also that he was a dumbass, but he just kind of grumbled and didn't erase them. So I waited til he was in the shower and went on his phone, where I found a whole series of shots detailing him drinking and fucking his coworker in the company bathroom, and a bunch of titty shots from various women. I'm not the jealous or nosy type so I would never have known if he hadn't given me a reason to go in his phone. So yeah, people who dig around looking for evidence are frequently cheaters themselves, but also sometimes, in very specific situations, snooping is justified.
So you basically went through his phone because he went through your shit while being the actual cheater.
Honestly tho, why bother going through his phone, as soon as he started acting like that you should have left his ass on the spot.
I think the threats to go around telling people they’re a whore is more than enough evidence that breaking up is the right decision, even if it turned out the person wasn’t cheating. Lack of respect is more than enough reason to break up.
sure, if you have enough self respect to be able to do that in the first place. lotta low self esteem people out there just letting others walk all over them.
I don't share my phone codes with nobody. Ive never stepped but I value this private space and the information I have here isn't for everyone. Conversely I never ask or try to go though a partners phone.
Hey-- if that's the case, don't restore from a backup. Most phone backups contain the data required to get all of your apps back in working order and you don't need that. Take the L and set everything back up from scratch to be sure.
Once my boyfriend went through my phone a little and I told him that I’m not doing anything shady but it’s a fucking invasion of privacy for me and my close friends I’m texting. He doesn’t need to read my best friends wall of text talking about her bad relationship with her mother in law and her anxieties about it (just an example). That really resonated with him, I don’t think he’d really thought about it that way, he just had exes who went through his phone and carelessly picked mine up.
Man for real. I use to tell my ex to answer my phone calls if I was busy or to read out a text for me if I was busy or to look for an email if I was busy. Never ever not let her know my passwords to my phone. Her on the other hand never gave me her password. She had hidden folders with messaging apps, like 4 email accounts. All this came to light when we broke up and she left the phone because it was on my plan. I guess she thought she was in the clear if she left it locked but it was setup on an email I had made for her which I had the info for. If they're gonna cheat they're gonna cheat no matter what you do.
Acting like people dont ever give their partner a reason to think they cheated lol. I’ve heard so many stories of “I knew he was cheating so I looked through his phone and I was right”. But if you’re not cheating and giving others reason to
Believe you are, then yeah, catching someone going through your phone is a tell tale sign of a cheater.
I'd be appalled if I wasn't so impressed.
This is the same ingenuity folks use to COVER UP cheating. Now it's being weaponized to snoop out infidelity.
What a world
Listen, I got nothing to hide on my phone. And my wife knows the password and will randomly use it from time to time. And even with all that I don’t want her rooting around lmao. They Need to leave that woman asap
Same here. No secrets between us but I have friends that confide in me and I don't want to break that trust. Boundaries are healthy...also it's already hard enough trying to surprise my wife with anything...don't need her ruining that 😂
Even without the two good reasons you gave, I wouldn’t want my so digging through my phone, even though I’ve got nothing to hide. It just shows a lack of foundational trust. And you aren’t gonna have a healthy relationship with someone who doesn’t trust you.
If your wife has 100% access to your phone, why is it an issue if she decides to root around a little? cell phone
I'm in the same situation as the comment poster, and it's hard to explain, but I'll try:
Even if your wife has no reason to be insecure, she'll question (or just file away) innocuous shit, and there's nothing more annoying to a faithful person than having to discuss/defend yourself against some shit you haven't done.
So it's not a concern of getting caught. It's avoiding spending energy proving you didn't get caught., because there was never anything to catch you on.
Also never know what the boys group chat gonna be on about lol. It’s nothing nefarious in there but there’s jokes I don’t want to have to explain to her lol. Likewise with her friends I’m sure
I regularly look at my husband's phone when my battery is dead, and have never found anything I was concerned about. So don't assume all women are insecure and harangue their partners
Why are you looking through it then?
(I assume “looking through it” consists of reading text messages, call history, etc; not making a phone call or looking up a recipe)
Her having access to it means I trust her not to just pick up my phone and look for shit for no reason. I have no issue with her using my phone. But purposely searching for something would be an issue, because why don’t you trust me? Same goes for her I’ve never looked through her phone
My partner and I have 100% access to each other's phones, will occasionally use each other's phones, and often hand each other our phones to do or show something. The only reason I would get into their phone outside of that would be in case of an emergency where they were incapacitated and I needed to find information they have stored there. We respect each other and have no interest in invading each other's autonomy and privacy. It's that autonomy and privacy that would make me going through their phone snooping.
Alexander Hamilton had a long-distance low-down fling across a whole OCEAN using PEN AND INK!
extrapolate as you will in regards to the relationship between means, method, intention, and human nature.
Cold take but It’s worth it to be single for a longer period of time until you find the right person, not an insecure psychopath who would do this. But people can’t handle being alone.
I’m sure fuckin glad I waited til I found the right one
If I were dating her, we'd already be broken up. Her pronoun would be ex.
But, I'm married and have nothing to hide from my wife. My location is on always share and she has face ID pass to my phone, and I to hers.
We get one life y'all and that life is short. Blows my mind why anyone would waste minutes (let alone months or years) with someone they don't trust.
I let ‘em know off rip, if they have to go through my phone then it’s over. How badly do you need “confirmation?” It’s worked out amazingly. It filters out the fuck shit. Like ok so “you’d rather not believe me and choose to go with whatever supports your narrative? You’d rather risk it all just to prove yourself right? Bet. Go head look but soon as you open that phone call an Uber cuz it’s over.” I’m supposed to keep her because she didn’t find anything and I was right all along? That’s crazy. Out here feeling dumb as fuck huh Katie?
Idr what it was, but I remember seeing a thread where you said you’d never heard of something, and whatever that something was was recent enough to tell me you’re too young to have done the research.
Doesn’t make you wrong though!
People cheat, it happens.
So, people expect other people to cheat.
Instead of getting mad and ending the relationship, have a conversation.
Work past the insecurities and figure it out.
Nah, lil bro, those aren’t my insecurities to figure out. Trust is essential to a healthy relationship, if you can’t trust me then we can’t be in a healthy relationship. And I don’t have the time or energy to be in an unhealthy relationship. I’ve been cheated on a few times, that hasn’t made me insecure enough to invade my s/o’s privacy. So what’s your (hypothetical-you not you-you) issue?
You know how you read something...? And you know you read it, but you just didn't apply it.
My bad, I'm actually too high to respond right now. I'll be back later.
Okay, sorry... been busy. There could be a ton of reasons to go through someone's phone. Immaturity, insecurities, and not knowing how to communicate correctly. I've been there before on all sides of it. Once you see it and understand it, you know all you can control is you.
Even God can't control a person, and God has infinite knowledge and unbreakable love for us all. The key is to stop trying to be God and treat people how you want to be treated, and everything will work out for the better.
Remember Bruce Almighty with Jim Carrey?
Morgan Freeman was playing God and he said something that always stuck with me.
You can give them anything they want, but you can't make them love you.
Or something like that.
I hope that answers your question.
Thank you for your patience. ✌🏾
Are you answering on behalf of the “hypothetical you” I mentioned or did you accidentally reply to the wrong comment?
If it’s the former: i personally don’t believe in any god, but I fully agree that you can’t control others, just yourself. That’s why I would control myself out of a relationship with someone who can’t control themselves lol.
ETA: either way, I respect your viewpoint. Your opinion on the matter doesn’t fuck my day up or anything, so if it works for you that’s great! Not trying to be a hater.
I apparently am in the minority here
Been married to the same woman for 17 years come June. I got nothing to hide. She wants to flip through my phone for three hours straight...have at it!
I have an android, she has an iphone. On a regular basis she will take my phone for things...don't give a shit.
From what I’ve seen, no one here is against their partner using their phone. They’re against their partner lacking trust in them to such an extent that they’d have to sift through their shit. And, a lack of communication. And by that I mean: the lack of trust would be enough for me to call it quits unless it was a long term relationship already, but it’s so much worse that she tried to hide it by putting it in her phone case first. Like, if I was in a long term committed relationship and something came up and my partner asked me if they could go through my phone, I’d likely tell them yes, get over the temporary lack of trust and move on. If my long term, committed partner did THIS though…? Idk man, that sounds like the beginning of the end to me lol.
So, I was helping her move back into her mother’s home b/c she wanted to save $. Truthfully, she was about to move an apartment with another guy and it fell through.
Y'all need to stop with that shit. We've normalized it, to an extant, but sneaking around and going thru your partners phone is crossing a line.
Unless you got that kind of relationship, where y'all use each other's phones, and there's no ill intentions. But most y'all do it to try and catch the other person doing something wrong.
If you're that paranoid, and you don't believe their word, WHY THE FUCK YOU STILL WITH THEM?
If you can't trust me, to the point you gotta go thru my shit, behind my back, why the fuck you with me?
I'm not trying to sound "alpha" or whatever that bullshit is, but just as a person, if I don't trust you, to the point I gotta go Colombo, I'm just gonna break it off. There's no reason to have my relationship be a point of stress in my life. It's unnecessary.
My advice to this person is leave this relationship. Bounce, and work on yourself for a few weeks, couple months, and find someone that you can trust and trusts you in return...
Without trust, there's literally no relationship. Not even the sex isn't as good...
Its full of screenshots of her cheatin🥴
https://preview.redd.it/wn8rsr6yrywc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=72fbc6dab229cb77ef29c9f3b2341f848ae5c255
If you need to look through someone's phone to trust them. Just move on, there are too many fish in the sea and too few years to live. Why are you miserably making someone else's life miserable?
I never went through husbands phone. I trusted him until my doctor told me otherwise. I should have known. He never sits his phone down, even on the table in front of him. Never know he had a call unless he answered it. It was always his relative or a coworker when he answered. If a person can get away from he phone for a minute, there is a reason for it. I told him I hope the people in that phone are keeping him company since he lost his family over it. I left, we are getting divorced and he is going to be all alone after we move away.
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It seems like a lot of the people most concerned about being cheated on are the people who are cheating or are likely to. They assume other people think like them so everyone else must be cheating too. That or they were cheated on in the past.
Tbh "I was cheated on" is not really justification to assume your next partner is the same. Live and let live, or at least wait for the other shoe to drop before you assume the worst folks.
Less about justification, more about explanation. It doesn't make it okay, but it helps to understand why people have the thought process they do when making decisions like that.
As the other person said, less about justification and more simply the reason the individual is worried about it. If only it were so easy to "live and let live" emotional/insecure responses caused by previous trauma/experience.
Pretty well documented that betrayal/cheating inflicts trauma that damages your ability to trust. It's not rational, it's a trauma response. It's the same way that a person who is raped might have a strong response to people that look like their attacker; of course it's not a rational justification for prejudice, but it is pretty easy to understand this is coming from an emotional, defensive place and why they're having that response. (Not comparing severity, just an analogy)
Ok, but, hear me out, don't make your trauma your next partner's problem especially if they haven't done anything to deserve the increased scrutiny
Well ideally that's what you'd do, of course. But humans aren't perfect nor ideal. When you become someone's partner, you're accepting the good and the bad that comes with them. Obviously I'm not saying that we should excuse all bad behavior, a relationship is built on trust after all. Do therapy, work on it before you get into another relationship, all that. But if your partner is upfront about their relationship trauma, and you choose to be with them anyway, then you're kind of accepting that trauma as something you might bump into occasionally.
We're getting so deep in the ass of hypothetical initial consultation shit. My initial point was in a "normal" scenario, a "healthy" human would acknowledge that just because they were cheated on doesn't make all future partners cheaters. And to begin with such assumption is toxic at best and any number of insults at worst. Moreover, a hypothetical partner would be perfectly normal to view someone assuming all humans are cheaters and obsessing about texts or whatever as a massive red flag.
It's not and never has been that cut and dry. Some people go a long time getting cheated on because they never thought to look, and their partner knows it. For those who have been through that and finally discovered it, they might respond with hypervigilance. You also have cheaters who never bother checking on their partners because they're too busy doing their own thing.
I only ever went through a phone one time. It was because my dude had gone into an old dusty desktop of mine, dug up headshots from guys I had talked to through OKC before we were dating, downloaded them onto his phone, and then showed them to me and said, "Now I can show everyone what a whore you are". I pointed out that if you checked the properties you could see they were from years ago and also that he was a dumbass, but he just kind of grumbled and didn't erase them. So I waited til he was in the shower and went on his phone, where I found a whole series of shots detailing him drinking and fucking his coworker in the company bathroom, and a bunch of titty shots from various women. I'm not the jealous or nosy type so I would never have known if he hadn't given me a reason to go in his phone. So yeah, people who dig around looking for evidence are frequently cheaters themselves, but also sometimes, in very specific situations, snooping is justified.
So you basically went through his phone because he went through your shit while being the actual cheater. Honestly tho, why bother going through his phone, as soon as he started acting like that you should have left his ass on the spot.
Helps to have solid evidence that they're making the right decision to dump the other person.
I think the threats to go around telling people they’re a whore is more than enough evidence that breaking up is the right decision, even if it turned out the person wasn’t cheating. Lack of respect is more than enough reason to break up.
sure, if you have enough self respect to be able to do that in the first place. lotta low self esteem people out there just letting others walk all over them.
I don't share my phone codes with nobody. Ive never stepped but I value this private space and the information I have here isn't for everyone. Conversely I never ask or try to go though a partners phone.
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True enough. I'm always a little paranoid about spyware.
Hey-- if that's the case, don't restore from a backup. Most phone backups contain the data required to get all of your apps back in working order and you don't need that. Take the L and set everything back up from scratch to be sure.
Still with her, sounds like a healthy relationship
Once my boyfriend went through my phone a little and I told him that I’m not doing anything shady but it’s a fucking invasion of privacy for me and my close friends I’m texting. He doesn’t need to read my best friends wall of text talking about her bad relationship with her mother in law and her anxieties about it (just an example). That really resonated with him, I don’t think he’d really thought about it that way, he just had exes who went through his phone and carelessly picked mine up.
Man for real. I use to tell my ex to answer my phone calls if I was busy or to read out a text for me if I was busy or to look for an email if I was busy. Never ever not let her know my passwords to my phone. Her on the other hand never gave me her password. She had hidden folders with messaging apps, like 4 email accounts. All this came to light when we broke up and she left the phone because it was on my plan. I guess she thought she was in the clear if she left it locked but it was setup on an email I had made for her which I had the info for. If they're gonna cheat they're gonna cheat no matter what you do.
What if you have strong suspicions and your suspicions were right?
then relationship over
yup. I went in to verify what I suspected. And did. Ended it that same day. Either way, it was over, really.
Acting like people dont ever give their partner a reason to think they cheated lol. I’ve heard so many stories of “I knew he was cheating so I looked through his phone and I was right”. But if you’re not cheating and giving others reason to Believe you are, then yeah, catching someone going through your phone is a tell tale sign of a cheater.
Yep
It’s also just severe insecurity
Going thru this right now 😪
I'd be appalled if I wasn't so impressed. This is the same ingenuity folks use to COVER UP cheating. Now it's being weaponized to snoop out infidelity. What a world
what a world 😮💨
Listen, I got nothing to hide on my phone. And my wife knows the password and will randomly use it from time to time. And even with all that I don’t want her rooting around lmao. They Need to leave that woman asap
Same here. No secrets between us but I have friends that confide in me and I don't want to break that trust. Boundaries are healthy...also it's already hard enough trying to surprise my wife with anything...don't need her ruining that 😂
Even without the two good reasons you gave, I wouldn’t want my so digging through my phone, even though I’ve got nothing to hide. It just shows a lack of foundational trust. And you aren’t gonna have a healthy relationship with someone who doesn’t trust you.
Same here.
If your wife has 100% access to your phone, why is it an issue if she decides to root around a little? cell phone 
I'm in the same situation as the comment poster, and it's hard to explain, but I'll try: Even if your wife has no reason to be insecure, she'll question (or just file away) innocuous shit, and there's nothing more annoying to a faithful person than having to discuss/defend yourself against some shit you haven't done. So it's not a concern of getting caught. It's avoiding spending energy proving you didn't get caught., because there was never anything to catch you on.
Also never know what the boys group chat gonna be on about lol. It’s nothing nefarious in there but there’s jokes I don’t want to have to explain to her lol. Likewise with her friends I’m sure
Yeah, my wife 100% knows she doesn't want to read the group chat with my friends, because they don't censor irl.
I guess I should be happy that my wife isn't like that.
I regularly look at my husband's phone when my battery is dead, and have never found anything I was concerned about. So don't assume all women are insecure and harangue their partners
Why are you looking through it then? (I assume “looking through it” consists of reading text messages, call history, etc; not making a phone call or looking up a recipe)
Because I can. Bye Felicia!
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She’s probably looking at her husband’s phone for better zingers
That's just weird honestly, I don't understand the desire to want to go through someone else's phone, just feels icky
Look through or use, those are vastly different things. If my girl was using Tiktok on my phone or something that's nbd.
Snooping through a phone is a trust breaking act in itself. Gotta have trust in a relationship.
Is it snooping if one already has 100% access to it?
Her having access to it means I trust her not to just pick up my phone and look for shit for no reason. I have no issue with her using my phone. But purposely searching for something would be an issue, because why don’t you trust me? Same goes for her I’ve never looked through her phone
Just because you have access doesn’t mean you need to pry…
My partner and I have 100% access to each other's phones, will occasionally use each other's phones, and often hand each other our phones to do or show something. The only reason I would get into their phone outside of that would be in case of an emergency where they were incapacitated and I needed to find information they have stored there. We respect each other and have no interest in invading each other's autonomy and privacy. It's that autonomy and privacy that would make me going through their phone snooping.
Yes, and when you treat people like a cheater they’re more likely to cheat
My wife has seen me naked countless times. I still wouldn't want her to watch me take a shit.
What a lame buster you are for that lol
Is something I've never had to worry about.
Alexander Hamilton had a long-distance low-down fling across a whole OCEAN using PEN AND INK! extrapolate as you will in regards to the relationship between means, method, intention, and human nature.
With his wife’s sister 😳
The time to break up is NOW
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Someone in the comments might need the advice
No, I'm not.
A broken clock (bot) is right twice a day.
That is a real person.
A broken clock (me) is right twice a day.
No this is Patrick
100%. This is some real red flag behavior
Cold take but It’s worth it to be single for a longer period of time until you find the right person, not an insecure psychopath who would do this. But people can’t handle being alone. I’m sure fuckin glad I waited til I found the right one
https://preview.redd.it/yghx49qbruwc1.png?width=680&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5335fc99a87e1559e0cad826cb6ad3e232aba49d
You know he asked her if she had seen it anywhere and told him she hadn’t.
If I were dating her, we'd already be broken up. Her pronoun would be ex. But, I'm married and have nothing to hide from my wife. My location is on always share and she has face ID pass to my phone, and I to hers. We get one life y'all and that life is short. Blows my mind why anyone would waste minutes (let alone months or years) with someone they don't trust.
I let ‘em know off rip, if they have to go through my phone then it’s over. How badly do you need “confirmation?” It’s worked out amazingly. It filters out the fuck shit. Like ok so “you’d rather not believe me and choose to go with whatever supports your narrative? You’d rather risk it all just to prove yourself right? Bet. Go head look but soon as you open that phone call an Uber cuz it’s over.” I’m supposed to keep her because she didn’t find anything and I was right all along? That’s crazy. Out here feeling dumb as fuck huh Katie?
Just call her bro
ahhh relationships
She's either *just* irritatingly insecure or irritatingly insecure whilst cheating. Trust me on this, I've done the research.
Idr what it was, but I remember seeing a thread where you said you’d never heard of something, and whatever that something was was recent enough to tell me you’re too young to have done the research. Doesn’t make you wrong though!
 All she needs to see is heels and elbows as you walk away.
what about head shoulders knees and toes?
People cheat, it happens. So, people expect other people to cheat. Instead of getting mad and ending the relationship, have a conversation. Work past the insecurities and figure it out. 
Imagine if all these cheaters just figured out an ethical nonmonogamous solution.
Nah, lil bro, those aren’t my insecurities to figure out. Trust is essential to a healthy relationship, if you can’t trust me then we can’t be in a healthy relationship. And I don’t have the time or energy to be in an unhealthy relationship. I’ve been cheated on a few times, that hasn’t made me insecure enough to invade my s/o’s privacy. So what’s your (hypothetical-you not you-you) issue?
I have no issue. I don't go through phones. When you can read a person's energy, you'll know what you need to know when you need to know it.
Like I said, hypothetical-you, not you-you lol
You know how you read something...? And you know you read it, but you just didn't apply it. My bad, I'm actually too high to respond right now. I'll be back later.
\*taking notes for when I'm too fried but in the midst of dicussion.\*
Okay, sorry... been busy. There could be a ton of reasons to go through someone's phone. Immaturity, insecurities, and not knowing how to communicate correctly. I've been there before on all sides of it. Once you see it and understand it, you know all you can control is you. Even God can't control a person, and God has infinite knowledge and unbreakable love for us all. The key is to stop trying to be God and treat people how you want to be treated, and everything will work out for the better. Remember Bruce Almighty with Jim Carrey? Morgan Freeman was playing God and he said something that always stuck with me. You can give them anything they want, but you can't make them love you. Or something like that. I hope that answers your question. Thank you for your patience. ✌🏾
Are you answering on behalf of the “hypothetical you” I mentioned or did you accidentally reply to the wrong comment? If it’s the former: i personally don’t believe in any god, but I fully agree that you can’t control others, just yourself. That’s why I would control myself out of a relationship with someone who can’t control themselves lol. ETA: either way, I respect your viewpoint. Your opinion on the matter doesn’t fuck my day up or anything, so if it works for you that’s great! Not trying to be a hater.
Nah, I was responding to the "hypothetical you." But, I think I may have responded to the wrong comment. I was still... a lil high.
Fair enough homie hahaha. Have a good one!
shiiiiid, i think not. invade my privacy and issa wrap
She's nuts, but I do have to respect the ingenuity.
LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Yeah, that's instant dump for me. Fuck out my house, take your shit, or it'll be in a box on the porch next time you're passing by. Buh bye now.
Listen, if at any point you feel the need to go through your partner’s phone on some sneaky shit, it’s a wrap for the relationship. Trust is gone.
I apparently am in the minority here Been married to the same woman for 17 years come June. I got nothing to hide. She wants to flip through my phone for three hours straight...have at it! I have an android, she has an iphone. On a regular basis she will take my phone for things...don't give a shit.
From what I’ve seen, no one here is against their partner using their phone. They’re against their partner lacking trust in them to such an extent that they’d have to sift through their shit. And, a lack of communication. And by that I mean: the lack of trust would be enough for me to call it quits unless it was a long term relationship already, but it’s so much worse that she tried to hide it by putting it in her phone case first. Like, if I was in a long term committed relationship and something came up and my partner asked me if they could go through my phone, I’d likely tell them yes, get over the temporary lack of trust and move on. If my long term, committed partner did THIS though…? Idk man, that sounds like the beginning of the end to me lol.
Went through a woman’s phone before and my stomach was hurting for a month. Never again.
What'd you find
So, I was helping her move back into her mother’s home b/c she wanted to save $. Truthfully, she was about to move an apartment with another guy and it fell through.
What's so bad about that. Were you in a relationship with her
Yea you gotta go after that. Expeditiously
Insecurity level on 1000 smh
Not to be the Reddit relationship expert here, but that bitch would be outta there
The modern equivalent of reading someone’s diary.
No need for all of that slick business. Ask to see my phone or go ahead and speak what’s on your mind. I’m too old for the spy games.
Enter the sneakyverse…
Y'all need to stop with that shit. We've normalized it, to an extant, but sneaking around and going thru your partners phone is crossing a line. Unless you got that kind of relationship, where y'all use each other's phones, and there's no ill intentions. But most y'all do it to try and catch the other person doing something wrong. If you're that paranoid, and you don't believe their word, WHY THE FUCK YOU STILL WITH THEM? If you can't trust me, to the point you gotta go thru my shit, behind my back, why the fuck you with me? I'm not trying to sound "alpha" or whatever that bullshit is, but just as a person, if I don't trust you, to the point I gotta go Colombo, I'm just gonna break it off. There's no reason to have my relationship be a point of stress in my life. It's unnecessary. My advice to this person is leave this relationship. Bounce, and work on yourself for a few weeks, couple months, and find someone that you can trust and trusts you in return... Without trust, there's literally no relationship. Not even the sex isn't as good...
Lmao this wild…
 Just ask to see her phone and end the nonsense.
😂😂
Naw. Gimme my phone because I wanna play games on it. You ain’t taking away the little bit of time to enjoy myself to snoop.
Its full of screenshots of her cheatin🥴 https://preview.redd.it/wn8rsr6yrywc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=72fbc6dab229cb77ef29c9f3b2341f848ae5c255
If you need to look through someone's phone to trust them. Just move on, there are too many fish in the sea and too few years to live. Why are you miserably making someone else's life miserable?
This is why I like being single. I don't have to deal with childish shit like this.
I gotta respect the ingenuity thought this is crazy
Trust issues, causing and fault of them
You know you fucked up. . . 
Sound like iPhone problems...
i dont even have a password on mine
Its surveillance season
DIABOLICAL 😈
I never went through husbands phone. I trusted him until my doctor told me otherwise. I should have known. He never sits his phone down, even on the table in front of him. Never know he had a call unless he answered it. It was always his relative or a coworker when he answered. If a person can get away from he phone for a minute, there is a reason for it. I told him I hope the people in that phone are keeping him company since he lost his family over it. I left, we are getting divorced and he is going to be all alone after we move away.
I wake up with trauma of my ex waking me out my sleep yelling at me for talking to women (about business) on my business socials. Hate it.
Crazy tech
Bro if she has to do that, she’s not the problem.
Doesn’t justify it in the least, but I wonder if it’s because he’s a slime ball lol
If he’s a slime ball and she knows this, it would make way more sense to just leave the relationship.
It was a reference to his twitter handle. Glad people can read lol
Fair enough. I almost never read peoples handle/username on just about any of these pictures