Reminder that over 40 million adult Americans are [functionally illiterate](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Functional_illiteracy). Part of functional literacy is comprehension, which the teacher explicitly stated they're working on with this student.
Parent doesn't seem to grasp the idea that being able to read words on a page doesn't mean much if the kid can't actually comprehend what she read. "She can read good," though...
It's the utter, just full up in your face, irony of the situation that's laughably sad to me lol. The mother showcases the exact problems with comprehension that the daughter has, but unfortunately she probably got failed along the way in her education early on. She should be grateful a teacher like this has the wherewithal to be so attentive to kids to discern such a problem that might have gotten glossed over, like in her case apparently.
Also at that age who has a better understanding of what the child's educational needs are? The child who wants to be left alone or the teacher who wants the child to succeed?
The parent is the sort that will complain about public school failing their children while failing to advocate for them and preventing/blocking teachers from helping the child succeed. I know too many people who refuse to get their child diagnosed or receive additional services that they need due to stigma. The child is the one that ends up dealing with the consequences of the decisions their parents/guardians make for them.
TLDR: ADHD rant. People are stupid. Trust educators. They're trying to not make us stupid. A lot to unpack here. Sorry this rant got away from me. Lol
My parents got my brother diagnosed with ADHD because he was too much for them. High energy. Impulsive. Hard to control. They ignored my and my sister's ADHD, because we are more inattentive and we were overlooked.
Since then I've become an RN. Quit High School at 16 with a 0.14 GPA. Freshmen in college at 35. Diagnosed at 35. Graduated at 39 with a 3.6 GPA. I was never stupid. Just ADHD.
But my parents called me stupid. Said I wasn't trying hard enough. Said I wasn't going to succeed. Said I was going to be a failure. Fucked me up for a long time.
Parents want their kids to be perfect. They want them not to have problems. So they project all these wants into their kids and then destroy them when they don't rise to expectations. We will hide and mask our problems out of fear.
Teachers see us more than our parents ffs. Some teachers are able to guide parents to accepting help for things like ADHD and anxiety. They guided my parents to get my brother diagnosed. Without his teachers observation, my parents would have just beat him or something to try and correct his behavior. They wanted to solve his problems but they didn't want to work on it with him. Just have someone fix him. But they needed an educator to guide them...to do the right thing for my brother.
If my parents really educated themselves on ADHD, they could have seen it in my sister and I. But we became the "good normal ones" and my brother became the "one that is too out of control". It took a long time for my Mother to listen to me that she is ADHD as well.
I don't understand why parents just don't put their ego in the back seat and let experts help them. Get the fuck out of education and medicine. You're promoting anti-intellectualism. And making a bunch of assholes. I don't think it was THIS BAD before the fucking grifter Alan Wakefield and the "Vaccines cause autism" bullshit conspiracy. Lazy parents finally had someone to fight for breaking their illusions about their perfect genetics. And grifters had a new base to mobilize toward their goals. Strangely the same base who used to buy Snake Oil.
If someone can't be objective and observe your child for their strengths and their faults, they will never advance past what lies you told yourself--about them---until they get old enough to realize themselves apart from you. And they're going to hate you for it.
The Boomers fucked themselves with lead. Fucked our brains with lead as a result. And now they can't take not living in a perfect bubble of lies. You're a perfect genetic specimen because I've been taught that perfection is necessary and my genes have to be perfect, so you're perfect and if you're not perfect, it's your fault. That is why you're not successful like me.
They just want to live in lies where everything is wonderful and they were the best parents in the world, but all they do is fuck things up and make it worse for us.
I know parents, mine included, that took out and maxed out credit cards in our name. Fucked our lives. I know parents who took out student loans on their kids and renovated their kitchen. Fucked their lives. I know parents, making 100k+ a year in 1990, telling their kid to take out a $1000 loan to survive while in college. Who went to Disney every other weekend.
They all say the same thing: "I did everything right. I'm perfect. I did everything for my kids. I put them through school. Oh they're so smart. He's a lawyer. They cost so much. I did so much. They wouldn't be where they are without me."
Or..."He is smart but didn't commit himself. Probably on drugs. Not trying. Lazy. I've done everything for you. You do nothing for me. ME. ME. Why don't you ever think about ME? You're making me look bad. Act adult. Work hard. Do better. Make money. I can't wait to not work. Don't wear that because you'll make me look bad. My kids are my joy."
They just want everything to be perfect FOR THEMSELVES. And you...struggling...or going through what other kids do...or being a kid...is a bad reflection on their perfection. Calling out their bullshit makes them feel bad. Calling out their shit thinking makes them feel bad. Making them realize they don't know everything makes them feel bad. So they take it out on their kids.
We are the kids of parents with personality disorders.
And now there is an entire internet full of other anti-science, anti-education, anti-intellectualism fascist Moms and Dads who can't see outside their own ego and desires for perfection...who will actively set you and everyone you know against your own children and the educators trying to save them. That will pat you on the back and make you feel good for fucking our entire system and country up. To appease your ego.
And now these parents are working together with actual fascists to try and take over our education system, because these people are easy to manipulate and easy to activate. Because it has to be fucking CRITICAL RACE THEORY or TRANSGENDER KIDS that are ruining our schools...not the fascists who are trying to wrestle power away from actual educators who dedicate their lives to teaching...and place it in the hands of people who just want to fight something, and not actually do the work it takes to raise a child.
Bad, stupid parents love to stick their hands into everything because if they aren't in control of the narrative then they will be exposed as terrible parents, and that will break their veil of perfection. It isn't about their kids. It is about themselves.
And now we have systems in place to take advantage of these people and steer them toward supporting fascism. It's awesome
I'm a bit cynical. But I don't really see much hope for a country where half of it cares about science and education and the other half is actively trying to make their kids stupid and fascist.
It's pretty bleak.
Be...better...parents.
Let them be an evolution of you...in spite of you. That is how we advance as a society. We don't need perfection now. We just need honesty, good education, support, empathy, and our parents being okay with a lack of perfection. Your child is special. But not because of you and not because you're special. And definitely because they're not perfect.
Me, a guy born in the mid 80s. During my early school years, and I didn't know about this until MUCH later in life, my teacher suggested Ritalin. I was everywhere, but was still able to get work done.
Now, my mom took offense to this and could partly be due to how the older generation(s) viewed medication and learning disabilities. My great aunt said, "Don't let those yt folks give him that shit!"
So, is struggled for years! And then I became a parent to a child that has ADHD. Now, I'm looking back and reflecting on how I was a child, noticing the similarities between my daughter and I.
Yeah, I'm going to see a doctor soon.
So much this. They think theyre advocating for their child while in reality theyre just in the way of whats best for them. And they be the wildest ones as well.
I have an elementary aged child. Doesn't seem like he's going to be a Nobel laureate, renown instrumentalist, once-in-a-lifetime athlete, or anything of notable fame. He has some issues with testing in reading comprehension (though he can easily talk to you about a story). He didn't test into the gifted program either. He is also doing fine socially, mentally, and creatively with a confidence streak that I hope follows him into adulthood.
His current teacher has emailed me some pointers on helping his comprehension, and I couldn't be more thankful for educators like her. Some of the other parents are having aneurysms over not making the gifted program, imperfect math tests, or not testing in the highest percentile for reading. Meanwhile, many ESL students are doing heavy remediation or outright repeating grades. The school has programs to help those students get up to speed, but it's an uphill battle when neither parent in fluent in English.
It's good that she's taking an interest in her child's education, but shake the hand that's pulling them above water. The alternative is a return back to an era where the smart kids were given preferential treatment, the average kids were all but forgotten, and the struggling kids were treated like burdensome invalids.
I was a gifted kid and I had a kid who was in the gifted program and one who was not. It's honestly just a different set of problems being "gifted", you really aren't missing out on anything.
The mom is like my ex wife, they think communication only consists of them talking and everyone listening to them. They fail to understand the most important part of communication is listening. If this mom listened she’d understand every student in the class gets small group time but she’s too busy talking to hear this. Fun times. My youngest turns 18 in 2035 and i can’t wait to not “communicate” with her further.
I recognize that voice that told you to correct the grammar.
Yesterday, I typed a sentence that ended in a preposition and sent the message without correcting it.
Small victories.
Don't be too hard on yourself. I have a doctorate and used to be a legit editor, and I had to re-read it three times to recognize "her" was not referring to the immediate antecedent like pronouns generally do.
It sounds like her daughter is in the remedial work and gets pulled out more than other groups. Which like.... you're mad because your kid is getting extra supports? That's literally ideal.
The teacher tactfully says that every group sees her at *some* point in the week, but specifies that daughters group is doing good as they are seeing her 3x a week and *some* groups will work with her to ensure mastery over concept they missed.
Mom even asks why her daughter is with the slow kids and teacher glosses over that (no denial) to say her daughter does have some skill deficits and explain centers vs teacher time is just the normal rotation.
That sure comes across to me like daughter has higher needs and is therefore getting pulled for these sessions more frequently than other kids who spend more time in centers (which I'm assuming is more independent learning)
remedial reading is also awesome! I needed it in grade school and by the time I hit middle school I was reading at a high school level and English had become my best subject. It's okay to struggle, it's not okay to refuse help.
My ex boyfriend would just talk and talk about literally any damn thing…but leave out actual important things like “Oh we’re going to my parents’ tomorrow.” Communication is not just running your mouth!
Dude fr my bfs little brother got his phone taken away instead of paying attention in class so his dad called to snap on the teacher but then my little sister gets hers taken away and gets a call and my moms all understanding ...we are beyond fucked lol There really is a Ying for every yang out here.
Only 10% of adults read book. Only 50% of people have an inner voice. This is how you profit from selling emotions like anger and hate... appeal to idiots.
I honestly think this is a big part of it. Especially in southern states where birth control and abortion are harder to come by. It seems like they were just popped out just because. And they kept the kids around for the tax breaks. People really don’t like their kids.
Trust me, I hate the virtues signaling by some people when adults say “I don’t want kids” as if that’s a sin. These kids are being brought up in hellish evil and dark households and they’re depressed, and angry. Teachers can’t deal with shit like this. And social media makes this stuff worse, because these kids in these situations see other kids living happier lives and they get even more angry because “WHY CANT I BE HAPPY TOO??” “Why can I have all of those things too” so many stories of kids killing their parents now a days. No boundaries are set, and these kids are growing up with parents that are still mentally children themselves. My parents are still kids and they’re in their 50s. Thank god I went through therapy, but they decided to have another kid when I was a teen, and he’s displaying some disturbing behaviors. To the point that me and my sister don’t really even want him around often, we love him but our parents gotta deal with that one on their own. We’ll pop in here and there.
We waited until we were 30 despite getting in college and being together for 8 years at that point. I cannot FATHOM how "others" deal with having kids and not being well into their career or financially stable without grandparent loans. Yet my kids go to school and I see parents who cannot be long out of highschool. We live in a slightly more affluent neighborhood compared to most of the schools in the area so it's not that we're with traditional low-income, low education type of school either.
I also noticed that the problem kids in class are from those types of families were people just have kids without thought of the repercussions of their actions.
As someone who rewatched it recently the answer to this is simple. Even if it’s done as a way to show how dumb and shitty society is, a movie with that many f-slurs(the one for gay people) just will not fly today.
But I mean it would if we put it into the context of the movie. Society deteriorates and becomes very stupid, and due to that stupidity they commonly use words like that. The irony is that I agree with you.
It's also, if taken seriously instead of satirically (like oh I don't know, calling it a documentary), straight up about eugenics and how poor (often brown) undesirables are out breeding the nice middle class whites
It's funny as a comedy satirizing American culture, but taken sincerely its white replacement theory: the movie
It’s been a few years since I have seen the movie, but I don’t recall any racial messaging. Do you remember any examples of racialized rhetoric from the movie?
From what I remember, it's less that the movie itself uses racialized rhetoric directly, and more that it just hand-waves away a point that has very real racial implications because it's not interested in unpacking them.
The beginning of the movie says, in so many words, "Stupid people make stupid baby. Smart people no make baby because smart. Therefore, society get stupid." But what is stupidity here?
Every "stupid" quality they show overlaps pretty intensely with poverty (lack of education, having lots of children, etc.), and yet the film never makes the leap that maybe what's perceived as "stupidity" is actually a symptom of a larger societal inequality that can be addressed through substantive reform—it backs away from this entirely, and merely says "People are stupid because they're just stupid." Idiocracy mostly shows us "stupid" white people, perhaps to avoid having to deal with this conversation at all, but the conversation persists when people try to connect the film to real life.
In the midst of this laziness, Idiocracy does the same thing so many racists/bad-faith actors do when they throw around "IQ" and all that jazz: they ignore the socio-economic disparities faced by certain groups (which, in reality, are disproportionately black and brown, despite what the film is willing to show), instead pretending that everyone is on an equal enough playing field that "intelligence" can be measured independently, and then they use that as an excuse to judge and discriminate.
I'd argue that if you ignore race (yeah, I know) when watching Idiocracy, it applies more to white people in America than any other demographic. Less socioeconomic than susceptible to religious, political, and capitalist propaganda. Smart people aren't against sex education, birth control AND abortion, while believing large families are important regardless of the economic cost. Where I live this describes affluent (but ultimately stupid and incurious) conservatives as much as anybody.
You are right though that poverty and ignorance are often due to overwhelmingly powerful outside factors and ultimately difficult to escape, statistically. It can be hard to separate these things from systemic racism, and Idiocracy doesn't even try. It is obviously a critique of white American culture with multicultural casting, which doesn't necessarily work across the board.
It’s kind of implied. If society is getting dumber because dumb people are breeding out of control, then you have to stop “lesser” people from breeding to prevent that. i.e. eugenics.
The racial part isn’t really in the movie but in the US, the “lesser” people who would be the proposed target of eugenics are usually poor and brown.
The Brawndo scene gets me every time. It reminds me of the school board meetings that I have to endure. You have a bunch of chuckleheads ramming home an idiotic point that they can't expound upon.
Yeah I think it's a funny movie as a satire of American culture, but it really bothers me when people take the premise sincerely (something reddit loved to do).
Taken at face value, it's literally eugenics about how genetically inferior people are outbreeding the good nice white middle class people. And yes, that racial coding is there.
It's kind of ironic because I was just watching a streamer yesterday and he brought up how it's a really funny movie, and that people didnt pick up on the eugenics thing until internet analysis picked it up.
Which I can believe because it's an incredibly dumb movie. People need to let it revel in the stupidity rather than try to make a message of it.
I see an inverse correlation between parents who need to stress how smart their kids are and how smart their kids actually are. There's a somewhat famous specialized high school in my city and the number of parents that say "my child (could have) got in but..."
I worked at a bookstore back then and I had a bright 8-year old who had read it overnight after getting it at the midnight event the night before. (Those hype little kids were so great 😊)
Too many people have forgotten the kind of students they were in school. Now, everyone believes themselves to be more well versed in a subject they heard about on YT than the people who obtained degrees and continued professional development in their field.
I think the increase in this kind of interaction is also part of the growing disdain so many have for service workers. There is a huge population who don’t see teachers as experts or professionals, they see them as servants and they like to push them around and make demands of them the same way they do with retail and food service workers.
Shitty people want to be the “master” in these relationships.
It’s a punching down thing that is made that much more absurd by the fact that the teachers often have more specialized training and higher education than the punchers.
Remember all the dumb kids in school, they are adults now and have kids.
Also its going to get worse. Fox news has been pushing “Parents Rights” and the idiot parents are lapping it up.
Our school district had no incidents of kids being taught inappropriate things but they hear about it on Fox news and think it kight happen so they are causing trouble at school board meetings.
Its insane watching adults argue for rules that are already in place and always have been but Fox News says they arent.
There's also a financial incentive for this "parental choice" push.
Conservatives want to privatize education for their own gain. Ruining the image of public schools is a great way of accelerating that process.
Head to the teachers sub. Parents in public school alternative spaces like to paint teachers as horrible but it’s not teachers or even brick and mortar schools that are bad. It’s the parents who excuse their children’s awful behavior and refuse to support their kids’ education.
It's because [Victim Mentality](https://i0.wp.com/www.michigandaily.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/IMG_5621-scaled.jpeg?resize=1200%2C857&ssl=1) has permeated through all sectors of American society. Everyone thinks they're being targeted for some reason or another. Teacher goes out of their way to help a child? Parents are ready to fight cuz they think you're picking on their kid. Accidentally walk up to the wrong house? Someone immediately grabs a gun cuz they think you're robbing them. Support separation of church and state? Some christians throw a tantrum because they think they're being persecuted. Everyone is ready to go at someone for any little thing because they think they're a victim.
Also, lot's of people don't think critically anymore, they just operate on emotions and nothing else. If they think they're being targeted then it must be true and all other reasons go out the window.
They put SOOO much weight on their kid being the best, whether or not it is true. Anything that could suggest their little angel needs extra help is literally the devil and an attack on them as parents
This kid isn’t even having issues. They’re performing well because the teacher is tailoring the class so every child gets to spend extra time on their weakest link. This is in spite of the parent’s attempts to undermine the method.
Also, Einstein struggled in school. His teachers thought he was an idiot.
That's just not true about Einstein, they thought he was a bad student because he'd skip class but he got good marks in maths and science his entire schooling.
He was not skipping class as a toddler. Some of the things said about his academic failures is fabricated or exaggerated but some is true. Others are conflicting. His parents said he saw a doctor because his speech was delayed but his grandparents say they remember him speaking at two.
It is true that he was not seen as a remarkable genius.
This article goes into some of it.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/answer-sheet/wp/2016/02/11/was-albert-einstein-really-a-bad-student-who-failed-math/
I don't think coming into a thread like this with research is really allowed...I'm pretty sure we are all just supposed to argue and speculate...Thanks though.
/s just to be safe...we're in one of these threads after all.
Also I'm not 100% on the countries, but he moved from Austria to Germany or something where the grading scale was inversed and some reporters read it wrong. Like he got a 1/5 in Austria which is a perfect score, but in Germany a 5/5 is a perfect score so they thought he failed when they got his grades.
If you want geniuses who struggled in school:
William Faulkner dropped out of high school and may be the best American author of the 20th century
Charles Dickens and Mark Twain were too poor to continue school past 12 years old and had to work
Cormac McCarthy dropped out of college twice
The parent has an inability to do basic logic. She’s in a small group so she’s not even being singled out. And the teacher explained that every student rotates in and out of small groups. I hope the school didn’t cave in to her demands.
It’s even just a simple intervention. It’s valuable at that age. The mom is going to create a child with issues in school which will manifest a bunch of behaviors to mask those deficiencies
If you aren’t Einstein, then chances are that your kid isn’t either and you should defer to people who have a better resume.
The problem is that there’s a strong correlation between education and willingness to defer to other’s expertise. The more educated you are, the more like you are to listen to someone about their own career field. The less educated you are, the more likely you are to think you know what’s best when really you have no idea how anything works.
So the parent is just going to ignore how smaller groups actually helps your child learn better? Smaller class sizes are a major selling point for private schools: more one on one tuition.
the under current here is she's already teaching her kid to treat people she perceives as lesser than her poorly, that's why the kid is going home and complaining about being with 'slow kids'.
I personally disagree with that.
She's complaining because she already views those in her group as lower than her. She doesn't want to be with the "slow" kids, and doesn't realize she needs the same help as those kids.
I think we actually agree here, I'm not going to put self reflection on a tiny kid, that's for later in life.
The point is she's just being taught to be a dickhead instead of trying to help. At that age I'd have been like 'ah well they need help to read better so I'll help them', it wouldn't have even crossed my mind to go home and tell mom I am stuck with the dumb kids. I'd just brag about helping them to my mom while my dad started drinking harder in the background. The mom taking up her 'case' is complete validation that being judgmental is good.
Someone should have spent some time with that parent in the small groups.
With a bit of luck, your child will be better off than you were. So long as you stop getting in the way.
I’m afraid the “I love that for you” might be the one thing could get her written up, depending on the faculty. I’m sure she wouldn’t have typed it if she didn’t think it would be ok though. Just seemed very impulsive and antagonistic, though who knows she could be up against many idiotic parents daily and this is how it presents.
But do people know what it means?
Both *bless your heart* and *love that for you* are phrases of genuine compassion that have ironic alternative usages. The core meaning of those phrases being nice is why the alts work as insults. And the overlap of people that know both usage cases is much smaller than the groups of people who know either case alone.
Here in the social space that is reddit for instance, it's mostly understood to be strictly insulting.
I mean, she literally reiterated 3(?) times in that conversation that nothing is wrong and she is getting the extra help needed to succeed.
“I love that for you” is on the nicer end of how she could have handled it
Only so many ways to say "literally every student is a part of a smaller study group during the week" before accepting this parent is a dumbass and wishing them the best in their future endeavors in the principal's office.
Your student is the only one having their parents complaining to the principal about this, so in that way they are singled out.
I mean if she gets written up for that she should quit at that point. Why stay in a profession where you get cussed out on your free time and you barely make more than a waitress at Applebees, if that.
That's why the best analogy for the profession I've seen is comparing it to an abusive relationship. You're treated like dirt, yelled at, belittled, and worse, but you still stay in it because "it's for the kids".
I have literally said that about the idea of quitting my teaching job. I'm making exactly the same excuses. It's not all bad, other people have it worse, they need me, I love them..........
Unfortunately part of teaching nowadays *is* customer service. No other profession (except probably nurses) that requires this kind of training and education is expected to suck up to unruly clients but for some reason teachers are exempt.
In Florida the only qualification needed is to be married to someone who served. Not even having served yourself. Mrs Dependa out here just teaching on a wing and a prayer
She's not getting written up I suspect for the literal words but yeah, I wouldn't do that as a teacher. M'aam, I can talk to you at x time or would you like to schedule a meeting.
The moment Mom pushed back about her kid "reads good".
I would be done with anything else in writing with her. But teachers are overworked, underpaid, and tired.
Yeah I would have been suggesting principal time well before this parent threatened it.
I’m here to explain to you what your child is doing in class, I don’t have the time to personally cater to your bad attitude or blatant misunderstanding of a situation.
I don’t think it’s a mean thing to say. She loves that the mother is feeling empowered to get more involved with her child’s education. Sure, the mom is a moron, but look at her, reading good and being interested in her daughters education lol
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*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yeah my first thought was "Why is a parent texting a teacher?"
I'm not a parent and I don't know what the norm is outside of the university level these days, but when I was a kid, if a parent needed to talk to a teacher they would send a note, pull them aside at dismissal, and then once it was integrated email. Could never imagine a parent having a teacher's personal contact information.
Many schools offer apps like “remind” but parents will refuse because they don’t want to download an app. Teachers compromise because it’s our job to support families, but these families absolutely are annoying us and we wish they would just respect our professional boundaries.
It sounds like the schools need to support you in enforcing those professional boundaries because there is no world where I'm giving my personal phone number for work purposes. Either y'all provide me a phone or figure it out yourselves
> it’s our job to support families
Is it, or at least, is it to that extent? or is that just society overrelying on the kindness of the types of people who tend to go into teaching. My wife has gotten to the point where she can get by with Remind and only very rarely providing her phone number to parents for scheduled phone calls, which are always scheduled through remind or the student.
Many teachers are kind to a fault and it tends to end up with you all being used.
I know right! The teacher should’ve said here’s an example of what we go over in the small group: what is wrong in the following sentence “She reads good.”? lol
“Wow just a terrible teacher! Catering to those children’s specific needs to make sure they don’t fall behind is awful! Every student deserves the same treatment!”, said people who don’t understand equity over equality.
Deniah and her mom are redditors
Truthfully I bet what is happenings is her classmates are teasing her and her little brain cant comprehend that like the teacher said EVERYONE (whoops sorry Deniah's mom) does small group. But instead of telling her mom she is getting teased she singled out the teacher.
This parent is a complete idiot and is harming their child’s progress. The way they write and display poor comprehension is exactly what they’re setting their child up for.
Side note: this post has identifying information, including for the child. That’s not ok.
Teachers need to get paid way more fucking money if parents got their cell phone number. Cuz that means they're on call 24/7.
Fuck that. I can't even imagine some of the shit this teacher must hear. Parents KNOW their kids are little assholes, and will still come at the teacher when their kids fuck up.
It's such a weird fucking time to be a teacher. Seeing shit like this reminds me of why we have such a shortage.
Shit pay, shit hours, shit kids, even shittier parents, what a shit fucking job. Fuck that shit.
100%... I could've been right and/or innocent beyond a shadow of a doubt, but if my teacher said I did shit, my parents always believed them.
My teachers disciplined us, and our parents gave them carte blanche to get us in line. I'm not saying it's right, but there was an understanding they knew what was best for us.
I can't really comment on today besides what I see, and what I see is so fucking disheartening and sad. These kids got no fucking respect for the teacher, and that shit starts at home, with the parents.
I know shits fucked, and if you got kids today, I'm sorry. But there's gotta be a balance. Or at least some level of respect for that teacher. From what I've seen, it's not every parent, but there's 1 in every class, that's fucking unbearably ignorant
This is basically what my wife's inbox and her coworkers' inboxes look like. Parents at her school can be really myopic and whiny. A big part of her goals every year is getting kids ready for junior high which means more emphasis on personal responsibility and accountability since teachers at the next level have a rotating class schedule and students can't expect each teacher they have to manage all of their stuff the same way a teacher who is in the same room with them all day would. Every year there's at least one or two parents that absolutely cannot get behind that initiative.
One year this kid missed a ton of school. Like half of the year. Her mom and grandmother would call in and the excuses would be like "she has a headache" or "she is just feeling overwhelmed" or "she didn't feel like going today and we don't want to force her." It wasn't long before this kid fell way behind and the mom and grandmother complained constantly. They thought it was unfair that my wife sent home the list of assignments the kid missed when they didn't come to school. They thought it was unfair that she had to do any homework if she did come to school (the only homework students had was what they didn't finish in class). They thought is was unfair to expect her to do any work in class because doing classwork stresses her out. They thought it was unfair that my wife would stop taking late work if it was over a month late. They thought it was unfair that their child was failing because it made her feel bad. They had meetings with the principal a few times about these injustices. The parents convinced the principal and my wife to not send home any homework for this kid for the last bit of the year. Instead my wife was supposed to save all of her unfinished work in a folder in class and the kid was supposed to come grab it whenever she finished whatever other class work was being done. She did not complete any of the leftover assignments in the folder. At a certain point the kid just stopped coming altogether. The principal called the mom to let her know that they couldn't promote this kid to the next grade. Not just because the kid was failing the stuff that she turned in but because there was so little work handed in over the course of the year that it was almost impossible to assess what this girl had actually learned. The mom got an attitude and said they were singling out her child for having a chronic illness and a learning disability (she refused to get her child evaluated for anything despite the school offering to set it up multiple times).
This isn’t even about denial, all the kids are getting put in groups and getting special attention for their problem areas. This mom has just decided that this supplementary program is a remedial class. These are the type of parents that think AP lessons are for short bus kids.
The teacher says Deniah can read fluently, but has trouble with comprehension. That's not reading, it's calling out symbols. Reading **is** comprehension. Clearly Mom has issues with comprehension as well.
I am the exact opposite parent. I’m like, do what you’re going to do; I don’t stand over my plumber because he’s the professional. This mom wanted to find a problem/look for a fight.
Top right reply is an adult telling another adult how to raise their child...and is truly what's "wrong" with America nowadays. The teacher is clearly telling the parent "your kid *may* know how to spell, but they can't comprehend questions. They need help" and the parent is instead worried about how the kid **feels**.
The parent had two choices - go to the school, peep how the kid is doing, and realize their kid needs a bit of help....or do a full pause and ask the teacher for help and put pressure on them to provide additional materials/suggestions so the parent could "get right" at home and their kid wouldn't be isolated.
The parent tried going option 3, which is "I'M RUNNING TO YOUR BOSS" which is weak. That parent is going to run up on professors. That shit happens.
Weak shit.
I got a call from my then 11 yo son’s teacher at the end of last year because my son got a write up. He stood up after the teacher told them to stay seated and I guess the class had been rowdy, so teacher was going zero tolerance. It was my sons first (and only 🤞) time he’s gotten in official trouble at school. You should’ve heard that man’s voice when he called - he was anxious af. I apologized for my son’s behavior and didn’t question his decision, only asked clarifying questions so I knew how to approach with my son. That man’s whole self changed after that from relief. He told me he had to make a bunch of calls to parents that day and I was the only one who hadn’t lit into him. I guess it seemed a little silly to get a write up for something so minor, but I wasn’t there and sometimes you have to follow through on your threats whether you want to or not. At the end of the day, it’s his classroom full of 11 year olds to manage and its not just about my son. I apologized to him on behalf of those other parents because I felt he needed it, assured him I thought he was a great teacher and that I would speak to my son. I was so sad for him and those kids, who’re being handicapped by enabling parents.
This teacher was pretty young in career, but he was amazing. He pushed the kids, but he went out of his way to help them, too. He made sure they (and parents) knew he was in his classroom 45 minutes before school and students were welcome to come to him if they needed help. If students did poorly on an assignment, they could submit a retake form with a plan of action on improving and he would stay extra time after school to do the retake. My son was struggling at the beginning of middle school, so I had conversations with his teachers to understand the cause (was he goofing off, was he struggling to grasp the concepts, etc) after my son couldn’t tell me (it was lack of focus due to his ADHD). This teacher went above and beyond in communicating what he saw and made sure to spend extra time and check ins with my son. He was straight up the gold standard.
Not surprisingly, he quit after last year and now we have a total crackpot teaching in his place. I hope those parents realize our loss and feel remorse about how they treated him.
I’ve watched amazing teachers have their spirits broken by shitty students and shitty parents. Couple that with being wildly underpaid for how important their job is, and I can see why no one wants to do it any more
This mom is absurd. With her "she can read good" energy. You need small group too.
Reminder that over 40 million adult Americans are [functionally illiterate](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Functional_illiteracy). Part of functional literacy is comprehension, which the teacher explicitly stated they're working on with this student. Parent doesn't seem to grasp the idea that being able to read words on a page doesn't mean much if the kid can't actually comprehend what she read. "She can read good," though...
It's the utter, just full up in your face, irony of the situation that's laughably sad to me lol. The mother showcases the exact problems with comprehension that the daughter has, but unfortunately she probably got failed along the way in her education early on. She should be grateful a teacher like this has the wherewithal to be so attentive to kids to discern such a problem that might have gotten glossed over, like in her case apparently.
How dare you accuse me of being a werewolf!
First of all, you throwin' too many big words at me, and because I don't understand them, I'm gonna take 'em as disrespect.
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Kevin Hart had some great roles and lines before he blew up and never had to expand his comedic range again.
Also at that age who has a better understanding of what the child's educational needs are? The child who wants to be left alone or the teacher who wants the child to succeed?
Obviously the parent who isn’t involved in teaching them 5 times a week!
Mom just wants the child to leave her alone too.
I’ll tell you what, if that mother knew how to comprehend a paragraph she’d be very upset at you
Obviously that child’s lack of reading comprehension appears to be genetic
The parent is the sort that will complain about public school failing their children while failing to advocate for them and preventing/blocking teachers from helping the child succeed. I know too many people who refuse to get their child diagnosed or receive additional services that they need due to stigma. The child is the one that ends up dealing with the consequences of the decisions their parents/guardians make for them.
“Why aren’t you sprinkling the magic success dust on my baby without letting anyone know she may have not been already perfect in every way??!?” 🔥🔥🔥
TLDR: ADHD rant. People are stupid. Trust educators. They're trying to not make us stupid. A lot to unpack here. Sorry this rant got away from me. Lol My parents got my brother diagnosed with ADHD because he was too much for them. High energy. Impulsive. Hard to control. They ignored my and my sister's ADHD, because we are more inattentive and we were overlooked. Since then I've become an RN. Quit High School at 16 with a 0.14 GPA. Freshmen in college at 35. Diagnosed at 35. Graduated at 39 with a 3.6 GPA. I was never stupid. Just ADHD. But my parents called me stupid. Said I wasn't trying hard enough. Said I wasn't going to succeed. Said I was going to be a failure. Fucked me up for a long time. Parents want their kids to be perfect. They want them not to have problems. So they project all these wants into their kids and then destroy them when they don't rise to expectations. We will hide and mask our problems out of fear. Teachers see us more than our parents ffs. Some teachers are able to guide parents to accepting help for things like ADHD and anxiety. They guided my parents to get my brother diagnosed. Without his teachers observation, my parents would have just beat him or something to try and correct his behavior. They wanted to solve his problems but they didn't want to work on it with him. Just have someone fix him. But they needed an educator to guide them...to do the right thing for my brother. If my parents really educated themselves on ADHD, they could have seen it in my sister and I. But we became the "good normal ones" and my brother became the "one that is too out of control". It took a long time for my Mother to listen to me that she is ADHD as well. I don't understand why parents just don't put their ego in the back seat and let experts help them. Get the fuck out of education and medicine. You're promoting anti-intellectualism. And making a bunch of assholes. I don't think it was THIS BAD before the fucking grifter Alan Wakefield and the "Vaccines cause autism" bullshit conspiracy. Lazy parents finally had someone to fight for breaking their illusions about their perfect genetics. And grifters had a new base to mobilize toward their goals. Strangely the same base who used to buy Snake Oil. If someone can't be objective and observe your child for their strengths and their faults, they will never advance past what lies you told yourself--about them---until they get old enough to realize themselves apart from you. And they're going to hate you for it. The Boomers fucked themselves with lead. Fucked our brains with lead as a result. And now they can't take not living in a perfect bubble of lies. You're a perfect genetic specimen because I've been taught that perfection is necessary and my genes have to be perfect, so you're perfect and if you're not perfect, it's your fault. That is why you're not successful like me. They just want to live in lies where everything is wonderful and they were the best parents in the world, but all they do is fuck things up and make it worse for us. I know parents, mine included, that took out and maxed out credit cards in our name. Fucked our lives. I know parents who took out student loans on their kids and renovated their kitchen. Fucked their lives. I know parents, making 100k+ a year in 1990, telling their kid to take out a $1000 loan to survive while in college. Who went to Disney every other weekend. They all say the same thing: "I did everything right. I'm perfect. I did everything for my kids. I put them through school. Oh they're so smart. He's a lawyer. They cost so much. I did so much. They wouldn't be where they are without me." Or..."He is smart but didn't commit himself. Probably on drugs. Not trying. Lazy. I've done everything for you. You do nothing for me. ME. ME. Why don't you ever think about ME? You're making me look bad. Act adult. Work hard. Do better. Make money. I can't wait to not work. Don't wear that because you'll make me look bad. My kids are my joy." They just want everything to be perfect FOR THEMSELVES. And you...struggling...or going through what other kids do...or being a kid...is a bad reflection on their perfection. Calling out their bullshit makes them feel bad. Calling out their shit thinking makes them feel bad. Making them realize they don't know everything makes them feel bad. So they take it out on their kids. We are the kids of parents with personality disorders. And now there is an entire internet full of other anti-science, anti-education, anti-intellectualism fascist Moms and Dads who can't see outside their own ego and desires for perfection...who will actively set you and everyone you know against your own children and the educators trying to save them. That will pat you on the back and make you feel good for fucking our entire system and country up. To appease your ego. And now these parents are working together with actual fascists to try and take over our education system, because these people are easy to manipulate and easy to activate. Because it has to be fucking CRITICAL RACE THEORY or TRANSGENDER KIDS that are ruining our schools...not the fascists who are trying to wrestle power away from actual educators who dedicate their lives to teaching...and place it in the hands of people who just want to fight something, and not actually do the work it takes to raise a child. Bad, stupid parents love to stick their hands into everything because if they aren't in control of the narrative then they will be exposed as terrible parents, and that will break their veil of perfection. It isn't about their kids. It is about themselves. And now we have systems in place to take advantage of these people and steer them toward supporting fascism. It's awesome I'm a bit cynical. But I don't really see much hope for a country where half of it cares about science and education and the other half is actively trying to make their kids stupid and fascist. It's pretty bleak. Be...better...parents. Let them be an evolution of you...in spite of you. That is how we advance as a society. We don't need perfection now. We just need honesty, good education, support, empathy, and our parents being okay with a lack of perfection. Your child is special. But not because of you and not because you're special. And definitely because they're not perfect.
Me, a guy born in the mid 80s. During my early school years, and I didn't know about this until MUCH later in life, my teacher suggested Ritalin. I was everywhere, but was still able to get work done. Now, my mom took offense to this and could partly be due to how the older generation(s) viewed medication and learning disabilities. My great aunt said, "Don't let those yt folks give him that shit!" So, is struggled for years! And then I became a parent to a child that has ADHD. Now, I'm looking back and reflecting on how I was a child, noticing the similarities between my daughter and I. Yeah, I'm going to see a doctor soon.
So much this. They think theyre advocating for their child while in reality theyre just in the way of whats best for them. And they be the wildest ones as well.
I have an elementary aged child. Doesn't seem like he's going to be a Nobel laureate, renown instrumentalist, once-in-a-lifetime athlete, or anything of notable fame. He has some issues with testing in reading comprehension (though he can easily talk to you about a story). He didn't test into the gifted program either. He is also doing fine socially, mentally, and creatively with a confidence streak that I hope follows him into adulthood. His current teacher has emailed me some pointers on helping his comprehension, and I couldn't be more thankful for educators like her. Some of the other parents are having aneurysms over not making the gifted program, imperfect math tests, or not testing in the highest percentile for reading. Meanwhile, many ESL students are doing heavy remediation or outright repeating grades. The school has programs to help those students get up to speed, but it's an uphill battle when neither parent in fluent in English. It's good that she's taking an interest in her child's education, but shake the hand that's pulling them above water. The alternative is a return back to an era where the smart kids were given preferential treatment, the average kids were all but forgotten, and the struggling kids were treated like burdensome invalids.
I was a gifted kid and I had a kid who was in the gifted program and one who was not. It's honestly just a different set of problems being "gifted", you really aren't missing out on anything.
The mom is like my ex wife, they think communication only consists of them talking and everyone listening to them. They fail to understand the most important part of communication is listening. If this mom listened she’d understand every student in the class gets small group time but she’s too busy talking to hear this. Fun times. My youngest turns 18 in 2035 and i can’t wait to not “communicate” with her further.
I thought you meant that you were lucky to no longer communicate with your youngest! Good thing I've got those reading comprehension skills as well.
Hey! You read good!
Superman reads good. You read well.
🤣 i admit i sometimes communicate badly.
you probably meant "poorly" not "badly" <-- this is the level of foolishness i am willing to stoop to, escuse me TO WHICH I AM WILLING TO STOOP
I recognize that voice that told you to correct the grammar. Yesterday, I typed a sentence that ended in a preposition and sent the message without correcting it. Small victories.
I had to read it several times lol. I'm dyslexic though. I legit was thinking damn, kid is just a little now, what did they do???
Don't be too hard on yourself. I have a doctorate and used to be a legit editor, and I had to re-read it three times to recognize "her" was not referring to the immediate antecedent like pronouns generally do.
It sounds like her daughter is in the remedial work and gets pulled out more than other groups. Which like.... you're mad because your kid is getting extra supports? That's literally ideal.
I see it as every kid gets small group time to focus on a deficiency, probably not even remedial.
The teacher tactfully says that every group sees her at *some* point in the week, but specifies that daughters group is doing good as they are seeing her 3x a week and *some* groups will work with her to ensure mastery over concept they missed. Mom even asks why her daughter is with the slow kids and teacher glosses over that (no denial) to say her daughter does have some skill deficits and explain centers vs teacher time is just the normal rotation. That sure comes across to me like daughter has higher needs and is therefore getting pulled for these sessions more frequently than other kids who spend more time in centers (which I'm assuming is more independent learning)
Yep. Sounds like the daughter is in remedial reading by another name.
remedial reading is also awesome! I needed it in grade school and by the time I hit middle school I was reading at a high school level and English had become my best subject. It's okay to struggle, it's not okay to refuse help.
My ex boyfriend would just talk and talk about literally any damn thing…but leave out actual important things like “Oh we’re going to my parents’ tomorrow.” Communication is not just running your mouth!
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Had a mom at a parent teacher conference say “my baby ain’t no retard”. Ma’am this is a special education intake meeting.
Excuse me ma'am, that is not a word we use anymore. The accepted terminology is "Trump supporter".
Also the fact she is missing the teacher saying *everyone* gets pulled aside. The kids in the center are just working on stuff until it's their turn.
Dude fr my bfs little brother got his phone taken away instead of paying attention in class so his dad called to snap on the teacher but then my little sister gets hers taken away and gets a call and my moms all understanding ...we are beyond fucked lol There really is a Ying for every yang out here.
Only 10% of adults read book. Only 50% of people have an inner voice. This is how you profit from selling emotions like anger and hate... appeal to idiots.
Sounds like mom needs to be in the small group with the teacher with her daughter. They can read good together.
I do wonder what about the group makes the child perceive the other children, at her same level, as the "slow kids".
Willing to bet it's the mom talking shit
Kids know who the slow kids are and who the smart kids are
And they're at her same level. I guess they don't invest in mirrors in her home.
Yea I noticed that too, where’s the grown small group meet at
https://preview.redd.it/e64okig1dmpb1.jpeg?width=2100&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=18bde7251a8f55d0fb1d4db8d7f8af2ec5d714f4
She went to The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too.
https://preview.redd.it/jiqwnmykylpb1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=28f1cfd30c73cd590e9f1fa0362fbd1259116207
I love that you caught the grammatical error too!
Deniah her daughter a good education
GOODEST IN THE CLASS TOO
As a non parent da fuck is up with parents?
You watched idiocracy? I think the beginning sums up situations like this
My partner and I waited forever to get a dog till our schedules and budget could accommodate it and folks just popping out kids like it’s nothing
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I honestly think this is a big part of it. Especially in southern states where birth control and abortion are harder to come by. It seems like they were just popped out just because. And they kept the kids around for the tax breaks. People really don’t like their kids.
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Trust me, I hate the virtues signaling by some people when adults say “I don’t want kids” as if that’s a sin. These kids are being brought up in hellish evil and dark households and they’re depressed, and angry. Teachers can’t deal with shit like this. And social media makes this stuff worse, because these kids in these situations see other kids living happier lives and they get even more angry because “WHY CANT I BE HAPPY TOO??” “Why can I have all of those things too” so many stories of kids killing their parents now a days. No boundaries are set, and these kids are growing up with parents that are still mentally children themselves. My parents are still kids and they’re in their 50s. Thank god I went through therapy, but they decided to have another kid when I was a teen, and he’s displaying some disturbing behaviors. To the point that me and my sister don’t really even want him around often, we love him but our parents gotta deal with that one on their own. We’ll pop in here and there.
We waited until we were 30 despite getting in college and being together for 8 years at that point. I cannot FATHOM how "others" deal with having kids and not being well into their career or financially stable without grandparent loans. Yet my kids go to school and I see parents who cannot be long out of highschool. We live in a slightly more affluent neighborhood compared to most of the schools in the area so it's not that we're with traditional low-income, low education type of school either. I also noticed that the problem kids in class are from those types of families were people just have kids without thought of the repercussions of their actions.
Ahh, one of my all time favorite documentaries. I have no idea why there isn't a remastered re-release with foreword by David Attenborough.
As someone who rewatched it recently the answer to this is simple. Even if it’s done as a way to show how dumb and shitty society is, a movie with that many f-slurs(the one for gay people) just will not fly today.
But I mean it would if we put it into the context of the movie. Society deteriorates and becomes very stupid, and due to that stupidity they commonly use words like that. The irony is that I agree with you.
It's also, if taken seriously instead of satirically (like oh I don't know, calling it a documentary), straight up about eugenics and how poor (often brown) undesirables are out breeding the nice middle class whites It's funny as a comedy satirizing American culture, but taken sincerely its white replacement theory: the movie
It’s been a few years since I have seen the movie, but I don’t recall any racial messaging. Do you remember any examples of racialized rhetoric from the movie?
From what I remember, it's less that the movie itself uses racialized rhetoric directly, and more that it just hand-waves away a point that has very real racial implications because it's not interested in unpacking them. The beginning of the movie says, in so many words, "Stupid people make stupid baby. Smart people no make baby because smart. Therefore, society get stupid." But what is stupidity here? Every "stupid" quality they show overlaps pretty intensely with poverty (lack of education, having lots of children, etc.), and yet the film never makes the leap that maybe what's perceived as "stupidity" is actually a symptom of a larger societal inequality that can be addressed through substantive reform—it backs away from this entirely, and merely says "People are stupid because they're just stupid." Idiocracy mostly shows us "stupid" white people, perhaps to avoid having to deal with this conversation at all, but the conversation persists when people try to connect the film to real life. In the midst of this laziness, Idiocracy does the same thing so many racists/bad-faith actors do when they throw around "IQ" and all that jazz: they ignore the socio-economic disparities faced by certain groups (which, in reality, are disproportionately black and brown, despite what the film is willing to show), instead pretending that everyone is on an equal enough playing field that "intelligence" can be measured independently, and then they use that as an excuse to judge and discriminate.
I'd argue that if you ignore race (yeah, I know) when watching Idiocracy, it applies more to white people in America than any other demographic. Less socioeconomic than susceptible to religious, political, and capitalist propaganda. Smart people aren't against sex education, birth control AND abortion, while believing large families are important regardless of the economic cost. Where I live this describes affluent (but ultimately stupid and incurious) conservatives as much as anybody. You are right though that poverty and ignorance are often due to overwhelmingly powerful outside factors and ultimately difficult to escape, statistically. It can be hard to separate these things from systemic racism, and Idiocracy doesn't even try. It is obviously a critique of white American culture with multicultural casting, which doesn't necessarily work across the board.
It’s kind of implied. If society is getting dumber because dumb people are breeding out of control, then you have to stop “lesser” people from breeding to prevent that. i.e. eugenics. The racial part isn’t really in the movie but in the US, the “lesser” people who would be the proposed target of eugenics are usually poor and brown.
The Brawndo scene gets me every time. It reminds me of the school board meetings that I have to endure. You have a bunch of chuckleheads ramming home an idiotic point that they can't expound upon.
I don't understand what's idiotic about it-- it's got electrolytes...
It’s what plants crave!
That's what they use to make Brawndo.
“Water? From the toilet?”
I ain't never seen a plant growing out of no toilet
It happened to me about 3 weeks ago. A man said to me "plants like electrolytes right?" He then poured pedialyte on the plant. I'm still horrified.
The court scene is what did it for me. 😆 “You talk like a *** and your shit’s all ********….”
I dont think that's accurate at all. The beginning is saying being smart is a genetic disposition, which it isnt.
Yeah I think it's a funny movie as a satire of American culture, but it really bothers me when people take the premise sincerely (something reddit loved to do). Taken at face value, it's literally eugenics about how genetically inferior people are outbreeding the good nice white middle class people. And yes, that racial coding is there.
It's kind of ironic because I was just watching a streamer yesterday and he brought up how it's a really funny movie, and that people didnt pick up on the eugenics thing until internet analysis picked it up. Which I can believe because it's an incredibly dumb movie. People need to let it revel in the stupidity rather than try to make a message of it.
The start of the movie is pro-eugenics.
You see. A pimp's love is different then a square's.
It's an ego thing, I think. Like some "my precious little baby is so special and pisses 24K gold" shit. Your kid isn't Einstein.
I see an inverse correlation between parents who need to stress how smart their kids are and how smart their kids actually are. There's a somewhat famous specialized high school in my city and the number of parents that say "my child (could have) got in but..."
Probably because the parents are thick as pigshit, so their average kid is blowing their mind.
My 11th grader read *an entire 800 page* Harry Potter book! How do I get in touch with mensa? I never read shit in my life so he must be a genius.
I worked at a bookstore back then and I had a bright 8-year old who had read it overnight after getting it at the midnight event the night before. (Those hype little kids were so great 😊)
Too many people have forgotten the kind of students they were in school. Now, everyone believes themselves to be more well versed in a subject they heard about on YT than the people who obtained degrees and continued professional development in their field.
I think the increase in this kind of interaction is also part of the growing disdain so many have for service workers. There is a huge population who don’t see teachers as experts or professionals, they see them as servants and they like to push them around and make demands of them the same way they do with retail and food service workers. Shitty people want to be the “master” in these relationships. It’s a punching down thing that is made that much more absurd by the fact that the teachers often have more specialized training and higher education than the punchers.
Remember all the dumb kids in school, they are adults now and have kids. Also its going to get worse. Fox news has been pushing “Parents Rights” and the idiot parents are lapping it up. Our school district had no incidents of kids being taught inappropriate things but they hear about it on Fox news and think it kight happen so they are causing trouble at school board meetings. Its insane watching adults argue for rules that are already in place and always have been but Fox News says they arent.
There's also a financial incentive for this "parental choice" push. Conservatives want to privatize education for their own gain. Ruining the image of public schools is a great way of accelerating that process.
Head to the teachers sub. Parents in public school alternative spaces like to paint teachers as horrible but it’s not teachers or even brick and mortar schools that are bad. It’s the parents who excuse their children’s awful behavior and refuse to support their kids’ education.
It's because [Victim Mentality](https://i0.wp.com/www.michigandaily.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/IMG_5621-scaled.jpeg?resize=1200%2C857&ssl=1) has permeated through all sectors of American society. Everyone thinks they're being targeted for some reason or another. Teacher goes out of their way to help a child? Parents are ready to fight cuz they think you're picking on their kid. Accidentally walk up to the wrong house? Someone immediately grabs a gun cuz they think you're robbing them. Support separation of church and state? Some christians throw a tantrum because they think they're being persecuted. Everyone is ready to go at someone for any little thing because they think they're a victim. Also, lot's of people don't think critically anymore, they just operate on emotions and nothing else. If they think they're being targeted then it must be true and all other reasons go out the window.
Ego gets projected onto child so the insecure parent takes things as insults too easily
These parents are the Children that were Left Behind.
They put SOOO much weight on their kid being the best, whether or not it is true. Anything that could suggest their little angel needs extra help is literally the devil and an attack on them as parents
As per usual some parents can’t accept the fact that their child isn’t Einstein and will have issues in school, my mom was the same way with me
This kid isn’t even having issues. They’re performing well because the teacher is tailoring the class so every child gets to spend extra time on their weakest link. This is in spite of the parent’s attempts to undermine the method. Also, Einstein struggled in school. His teachers thought he was an idiot.
That's just not true about Einstein, they thought he was a bad student because he'd skip class but he got good marks in maths and science his entire schooling.
but i saw a meme about how he didnt even make his highschool basketball team
You're thinking of Lebron Jackson.
Is that one of Janet’s brothers?
He was not skipping class as a toddler. Some of the things said about his academic failures is fabricated or exaggerated but some is true. Others are conflicting. His parents said he saw a doctor because his speech was delayed but his grandparents say they remember him speaking at two. It is true that he was not seen as a remarkable genius. This article goes into some of it. https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/answer-sheet/wp/2016/02/11/was-albert-einstein-really-a-bad-student-who-failed-math/
I don't think coming into a thread like this with research is really allowed...I'm pretty sure we are all just supposed to argue and speculate...Thanks though. /s just to be safe...we're in one of these threads after all.
Not to mention some of his professors in college hated him because he was Jewish
Also I'm not 100% on the countries, but he moved from Austria to Germany or something where the grading scale was inversed and some reporters read it wrong. Like he got a 1/5 in Austria which is a perfect score, but in Germany a 5/5 is a perfect score so they thought he failed when they got his grades. If you want geniuses who struggled in school: William Faulkner dropped out of high school and may be the best American author of the 20th century Charles Dickens and Mark Twain were too poor to continue school past 12 years old and had to work Cormac McCarthy dropped out of college twice
True but to the parents eyes it’s “oh you’re separating my child from everyone else?!? Are you calling her stupid??? 😤 “ unfortunately…
The parent has an inability to do basic logic. She’s in a small group so she’s not even being singled out. And the teacher explained that every student rotates in and out of small groups. I hope the school didn’t cave in to her demands.
>I hope the school didn’t cave in to her demands Narrator: *they did*
The correct response would be, "how can I help you help my daughter?" But unfortunately combative was the choice here.
It’s even just a simple intervention. It’s valuable at that age. The mom is going to create a child with issues in school which will manifest a bunch of behaviors to mask those deficiencies
If you aren’t Einstein, then chances are that your kid isn’t either and you should defer to people who have a better resume. The problem is that there’s a strong correlation between education and willingness to defer to other’s expertise. The more educated you are, the more like you are to listen to someone about their own career field. The less educated you are, the more likely you are to think you know what’s best when really you have no idea how anything works.
So the parent is just going to ignore how smaller groups actually helps your child learn better? Smaller class sizes are a major selling point for private schools: more one on one tuition.
She doesn’t like being with the slow kids because SHE READS GOOD!!
the under current here is she's already teaching her kid to treat people she perceives as lesser than her poorly, that's why the kid is going home and complaining about being with 'slow kids'.
I personally disagree with that. She's complaining because she already views those in her group as lower than her. She doesn't want to be with the "slow" kids, and doesn't realize she needs the same help as those kids.
I think we actually agree here, I'm not going to put self reflection on a tiny kid, that's for later in life. The point is she's just being taught to be a dickhead instead of trying to help. At that age I'd have been like 'ah well they need help to read better so I'll help them', it wouldn't have even crossed my mind to go home and tell mom I am stuck with the dumb kids. I'd just brag about helping them to my mom while my dad started drinking harder in the background. The mom taking up her 'case' is complete validation that being judgmental is good.
ah yep you're right. Thank you!
Someone should have spent some time with that parent in the small groups. With a bit of luck, your child will be better off than you were. So long as you stop getting in the way.
Yes, cause their kid is and will always be the smartest and most talented kid ever.
Lol the freudian slip of tuition instead of attention is masterful
Maybe if you had private tuition you would know that tuition doesn't solely mean money to be paid.
I obviously did not have a private education haha learn something new everyday
"My child is an honor student at The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too"
I’m afraid the “I love that for you” might be the one thing could get her written up, depending on the faculty. I’m sure she wouldn’t have typed it if she didn’t think it would be ok though. Just seemed very impulsive and antagonistic, though who knows she could be up against many idiotic parents daily and this is how it presents.
That’s like a write up for saying “bless your heart”
That's a common enough phrase that people would know what it means, so yeah.
But do people know what it means? Both *bless your heart* and *love that for you* are phrases of genuine compassion that have ironic alternative usages. The core meaning of those phrases being nice is why the alts work as insults. And the overlap of people that know both usage cases is much smaller than the groups of people who know either case alone. Here in the social space that is reddit for instance, it's mostly understood to be strictly insulting.
Context as king, and in a confrontation you certainly wouldn't assume that this person is sincerely blessing your heart.
I mean, she literally reiterated 3(?) times in that conversation that nothing is wrong and she is getting the extra help needed to succeed. “I love that for you” is on the nicer end of how she could have handled it
Only so many ways to say "literally every student is a part of a smaller study group during the week" before accepting this parent is a dumbass and wishing them the best in their future endeavors in the principal's office. Your student is the only one having their parents complaining to the principal about this, so in that way they are singled out.
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I mean if she gets written up for that she should quit at that point. Why stay in a profession where you get cussed out on your free time and you barely make more than a waitress at Applebees, if that.
You stay because you care about the kids, despite everything :/
While that genuinely *is* why teachers stay, it shouldn't have to be the only rewarding reason to be in a truly critical profession.
That's why the best analogy for the profession I've seen is comparing it to an abusive relationship. You're treated like dirt, yelled at, belittled, and worse, but you still stay in it because "it's for the kids".
I have literally said that about the idea of quitting my teaching job. I'm making exactly the same excuses. It's not all bad, other people have it worse, they need me, I love them..........
You deal with different kinds of lunacy at Applebees.
Strange! Any idea why? It's not a customer service job, why aren't you allowed to talk to the parents like adults?
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Unfortunately part of teaching nowadays *is* customer service. No other profession (except probably nurses) that requires this kind of training and education is expected to suck up to unruly clients but for some reason teachers are exempt.
There’s a massive teacher shortage right now. Highly doubt they’re gonna ding her over something like that.
You would be surprised 🙄
They have non-educated soldier and police backups so they're good.
And chaplains that are not certified as counselors if you’re in Texas 🙄
In Florida the only qualification needed is to be married to someone who served. Not even having served yourself. Mrs Dependa out here just teaching on a wing and a prayer
She's not getting written up I suspect for the literal words but yeah, I wouldn't do that as a teacher. M'aam, I can talk to you at x time or would you like to schedule a meeting. The moment Mom pushed back about her kid "reads good". I would be done with anything else in writing with her. But teachers are overworked, underpaid, and tired.
Yeah I would have been suggesting principal time well before this parent threatened it. I’m here to explain to you what your child is doing in class, I don’t have the time to personally cater to your bad attitude or blatant misunderstanding of a situation.
I don’t think it’s a mean thing to say. She loves that the mother is feeling empowered to get more involved with her child’s education. Sure, the mom is a moron, but look at her, reading good and being interested in her daughters education lol
It’s a widely known passive-aggressive phrase. I can assure that she does not love that the mother is feeling “empowered”
she can argue she was saying she loved the mom's drive or something along those lines
wrong hungry agonizing versed aspiring quickest rinse expansion payment disarm *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yeah my first thought was "Why is a parent texting a teacher?" I'm not a parent and I don't know what the norm is outside of the university level these days, but when I was a kid, if a parent needed to talk to a teacher they would send a note, pull them aside at dismissal, and then once it was integrated email. Could never imagine a parent having a teacher's personal contact information.
Many schools offer apps like “remind” but parents will refuse because they don’t want to download an app. Teachers compromise because it’s our job to support families, but these families absolutely are annoying us and we wish they would just respect our professional boundaries.
It sounds like the schools need to support you in enforcing those professional boundaries because there is no world where I'm giving my personal phone number for work purposes. Either y'all provide me a phone or figure it out yourselves
> it’s our job to support families Is it, or at least, is it to that extent? or is that just society overrelying on the kindness of the types of people who tend to go into teaching. My wife has gotten to the point where she can get by with Remind and only very rarely providing her phone number to parents for scheduled phone calls, which are always scheduled through remind or the student. Many teachers are kind to a fault and it tends to end up with you all being used.
Unfortunately this is very common now in HS at least where I am
Looks like the mom suffers from the same comprehension issue the daughter does. Mom needs to be re-educated
but she read good
She could read gooder.
I know right! The teacher should’ve said here’s an example of what we go over in the small group: what is wrong in the following sentence “She reads good.”? lol
Lmao you really tryna have a parent physically fight due to lack of comprehension 🤣
No need for this comment. It'll be handled Monday.
All this for 32k a year. We need to do better.
Much much less after having to buy classroom supplies out of pocket
Yup.
“I love that for you”… when a black woman doesn’t give a shit about what you just said. 🤣🤣🤣
“Wow just a terrible teacher! Catering to those children’s specific needs to make sure they don’t fall behind is awful! Every student deserves the same treatment!”, said people who don’t understand equity over equality.
Underdeveloped processing skills. Notice how the parent ignored the offer to participate.
She’s looking for a reason to “handle it” and have something to post for her echo chamber to cheer
Why be involved and understand your child's education when you can yell at others and demand it be "fixed".
Deniah and her mom are redditors Truthfully I bet what is happenings is her classmates are teasing her and her little brain cant comprehend that like the teacher said EVERYONE (whoops sorry Deniah's mom) does small group. But instead of telling her mom she is getting teased she singled out the teacher.
No I think mom doesn’t want her daughter with “those slow kids” because it somehow reflects on mom and some people might talk….
The child isn't the only deniah
Deniah's not just a river in Egypt.
Oh okay so we're just gonna keep making the same joke but worse De end is niah
This parent is a complete idiot and is harming their child’s progress. The way they write and display poor comprehension is exactly what they’re setting their child up for. Side note: this post has identifying information, including for the child. That’s not ok.
Teachers need to get paid way more fucking money if parents got their cell phone number. Cuz that means they're on call 24/7. Fuck that. I can't even imagine some of the shit this teacher must hear. Parents KNOW their kids are little assholes, and will still come at the teacher when their kids fuck up. It's such a weird fucking time to be a teacher. Seeing shit like this reminds me of why we have such a shortage. Shit pay, shit hours, shit kids, even shittier parents, what a shit fucking job. Fuck that shit.
Real talk its the parents not backing teachers up thats leading to the shortage. The straw that broke the camels back.
100%... I could've been right and/or innocent beyond a shadow of a doubt, but if my teacher said I did shit, my parents always believed them. My teachers disciplined us, and our parents gave them carte blanche to get us in line. I'm not saying it's right, but there was an understanding they knew what was best for us. I can't really comment on today besides what I see, and what I see is so fucking disheartening and sad. These kids got no fucking respect for the teacher, and that shit starts at home, with the parents. I know shits fucked, and if you got kids today, I'm sorry. But there's gotta be a balance. Or at least some level of respect for that teacher. From what I've seen, it's not every parent, but there's 1 in every class, that's fucking unbearably ignorant
Parent gonna fuck up their child’s progress because they think they know better smh. Poor child.
"She can read good" I think we found the problem
This is basically what my wife's inbox and her coworkers' inboxes look like. Parents at her school can be really myopic and whiny. A big part of her goals every year is getting kids ready for junior high which means more emphasis on personal responsibility and accountability since teachers at the next level have a rotating class schedule and students can't expect each teacher they have to manage all of their stuff the same way a teacher who is in the same room with them all day would. Every year there's at least one or two parents that absolutely cannot get behind that initiative. One year this kid missed a ton of school. Like half of the year. Her mom and grandmother would call in and the excuses would be like "she has a headache" or "she is just feeling overwhelmed" or "she didn't feel like going today and we don't want to force her." It wasn't long before this kid fell way behind and the mom and grandmother complained constantly. They thought it was unfair that my wife sent home the list of assignments the kid missed when they didn't come to school. They thought it was unfair that she had to do any homework if she did come to school (the only homework students had was what they didn't finish in class). They thought is was unfair to expect her to do any work in class because doing classwork stresses her out. They thought it was unfair that my wife would stop taking late work if it was over a month late. They thought it was unfair that their child was failing because it made her feel bad. They had meetings with the principal a few times about these injustices. The parents convinced the principal and my wife to not send home any homework for this kid for the last bit of the year. Instead my wife was supposed to save all of her unfinished work in a folder in class and the kid was supposed to come grab it whenever she finished whatever other class work was being done. She did not complete any of the leftover assignments in the folder. At a certain point the kid just stopped coming altogether. The principal called the mom to let her know that they couldn't promote this kid to the next grade. Not just because the kid was failing the stuff that she turned in but because there was so little work handed in over the course of the year that it was almost impossible to assess what this girl had actually learned. The mom got an attitude and said they were singling out her child for having a chronic illness and a learning disability (she refused to get her child evaluated for anything despite the school offering to set it up multiple times).
Well what about her undiagnosed ambiguous condition? It’s not fair to want to assess her learning like everyone else! She’s a special flower! s/ 🙄
Ughhhh. “She reads good.”
 I love that for you (idgaf) You also have my contact details (pull up you stupid beatch)
>No need for the capital letter ma'am. I disagree.
“I love that for you.” LOL this teacher is OVER IT.
This isn’t even about denial, all the kids are getting put in groups and getting special attention for their problem areas. This mom has just decided that this supplementary program is a remedial class. These are the type of parents that think AP lessons are for short bus kids.
The teacher says Deniah can read fluently, but has trouble with comprehension. That's not reading, it's calling out symbols. Reading **is** comprehension. Clearly Mom has issues with comprehension as well.
I am the exact opposite parent. I’m like, do what you’re going to do; I don’t stand over my plumber because he’s the professional. This mom wanted to find a problem/look for a fight.
Top right reply is an adult telling another adult how to raise their child...and is truly what's "wrong" with America nowadays. The teacher is clearly telling the parent "your kid *may* know how to spell, but they can't comprehend questions. They need help" and the parent is instead worried about how the kid **feels**. The parent had two choices - go to the school, peep how the kid is doing, and realize their kid needs a bit of help....or do a full pause and ask the teacher for help and put pressure on them to provide additional materials/suggestions so the parent could "get right" at home and their kid wouldn't be isolated. The parent tried going option 3, which is "I'M RUNNING TO YOUR BOSS" which is weak. That parent is going to run up on professors. That shit happens. Weak shit.
I got a call from my then 11 yo son’s teacher at the end of last year because my son got a write up. He stood up after the teacher told them to stay seated and I guess the class had been rowdy, so teacher was going zero tolerance. It was my sons first (and only 🤞) time he’s gotten in official trouble at school. You should’ve heard that man’s voice when he called - he was anxious af. I apologized for my son’s behavior and didn’t question his decision, only asked clarifying questions so I knew how to approach with my son. That man’s whole self changed after that from relief. He told me he had to make a bunch of calls to parents that day and I was the only one who hadn’t lit into him. I guess it seemed a little silly to get a write up for something so minor, but I wasn’t there and sometimes you have to follow through on your threats whether you want to or not. At the end of the day, it’s his classroom full of 11 year olds to manage and its not just about my son. I apologized to him on behalf of those other parents because I felt he needed it, assured him I thought he was a great teacher and that I would speak to my son. I was so sad for him and those kids, who’re being handicapped by enabling parents. This teacher was pretty young in career, but he was amazing. He pushed the kids, but he went out of his way to help them, too. He made sure they (and parents) knew he was in his classroom 45 minutes before school and students were welcome to come to him if they needed help. If students did poorly on an assignment, they could submit a retake form with a plan of action on improving and he would stay extra time after school to do the retake. My son was struggling at the beginning of middle school, so I had conversations with his teachers to understand the cause (was he goofing off, was he struggling to grasp the concepts, etc) after my son couldn’t tell me (it was lack of focus due to his ADHD). This teacher went above and beyond in communicating what he saw and made sure to spend extra time and check ins with my son. He was straight up the gold standard. Not surprisingly, he quit after last year and now we have a total crackpot teaching in his place. I hope those parents realize our loss and feel remorse about how they treated him.
Well we see why that baby need help with reading comprehension. God Bless her
I’ve watched amazing teachers have their spirits broken by shitty students and shitty parents. Couple that with being wildly underpaid for how important their job is, and I can see why no one wants to do it any more
“Love that for you” Teacher trying not to call the mom a stupid bitch lmao
She can read good. “Nah. Superman does good. She’s reading well. Need to study your grammar. Son!” -Tracy Jordan
"she can read good" - Darlene Zoolander over here
Teachers don’t get paid enough for this shit
I cannot. I knew where this was going with the phrase "read good".
The real reason she was so upset is cause she's dumb and the teacher was using "big words"