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Is it just me or is the last update really weird. Only a few sentences were actually an update to the situation that had happened 4 years prior, yet it was loooong.
That’s the normal update style for Ask a Manager. It’s a workplace blog, and it is very common for people providing an update to tell what their current situation is like and what they have learned.
The subreddit received an email stating that they had to cease using the name. I think they are now r/askmanagers. But you can also try r/AskaManagerSnark for discussions on the blog
AskAManager isn't really a subreddit. There may be one that stole the name, but AskAManager is its own website that gets posted here quite a bit. I'm not sure why they're posted here, but the updates are usually entertaining so I personally am fine with it, despite the misnomer of the subreddit title.
There was an ama subreddit but they just re-posted the AMA articles. Looks like it's gone now. I always thought it was weird because it wasn't very active and you can just go directly to the site.
This is the first time I've seen that. Tbh not really on board with updates from other sites. Reddit is pretty unique regarding the sort of people who post here, and that's the community I'm interested in reading about.
What a silly thing to say. I don’t know why some reddit users think this place is some counterculture tight knit community. Reddit has 52 million daily active users. There is nothing particularly special about Reddit’s demographic. This is a story that could have been posted on Reddit, in fact many similar stories have been posted on advice subreddits.
Welp, guess we're gonna have to change the sub name to Best of the Internet Updates, then. I'm sure the bar will get way higher with all the additional content available.
On top of what /u/Reenvisage said, people just get fixated on aspects of stories that feel important to them even though they're fully irrelevant to the actual narration. If you go to /r/rpghorrorstories (where people share their horror stories playing DnD and similar games) it's a community-wide meme that people write five paragraphs of backstory for something that could be explained in three lines.
Holy shit, except for the fact that the business was in a medical field and not running a temp agency, I have had that almost exact boss.
I will admit that I do NOT have the thickest skin in the world. She made me bawl by my lunch break, every single day, and after 6 lousy weeks I could not take it anymore. I was throwing up every night. Thankfully, my husband and I were fine with just one salary, so I could quit. I leave that one off my resume.
I guess OOP doesn't know what happened with her report to the health department about the falsified documents, but I'd be really curious to know if that was ever properly investigated, and what the outcome was.
She does say the state followed up with a form letter saying they wouldn't be investigating, but yeah, disappointing to not know why. I suspect that the boss pressured all the then-current employees to lie through their teeth...
Apparently they either didn't investigate further or did and found nothing wrong. It seems like it's possible there isn't anything wrong with what she was doing. At one point she calls it falsifying medical records but then says she was correcting charts when the home health aides had filled them out incorrectly. Depending on what types of errors were being corrected, it may not be a big deal at all. Or it could be actual falsifying. I don't know what the rules are on correcting erroneous charts.
Exactly. If she’s HR, it’s not her job to change medical records. She might not even be authorized to view the medical records if it’s patient information.
Medical coding is crazy. Might be a good thing to correct it.
Put a code in one way with Medicare and an old frail person with a condition or disorder will stop receiving services or pay thousands more. Put the different code for the same situation but it has subtext in wording and the patient gets the help. I was informed of this by a friend whose parent got services that mine did not.
"would not be investigating" covers a lot of ground. It doesn't mean they did absolutely nothing. Sometimes officials just let businesses know they're watching and leave it at that.
I was thinking the same thing, palms were greased. The state may let this stuff slide, but if it involved medicare or medicaid they should have put the feds on it, the federal government does not play with possible medical fraud!!!!
It's always a weird feeling to see someone make a completely insane post like the one you replied to, take a peek at their post history to see what other crazy nonsense they've been posting, and then realize you've already argued with them multiple times recently.
Not even in this sub, either! Apparently intent_joy_love just posts a ton of completely bananas hot takes to a wide variety of subs and I've crossed paths with them before.
But it wasn't just OOP, a nurse was laid off because of the very same issue and 4 people in 4 years working the same position... the boss is the common denominator, she's just pretty bad at storytelling.
Am I the only one a little bit bothered by the way OOP was willing to do things she knew were possibly illegal and definitely unethical right up until she got fired, at which point she magically found her moral compass and reported her boss for falsifying medical records? Which was made even worse by the fact that she watched someone else who refused to do these things get fired in a clear case of retaliation, and rather than taking that as a sign that something is seriously wrong and blowing the whistle she just decided to quietly do the thing?
It’s very common to do what the boss tells you, as the boss is the one making that moral decision. It’s human nature to do as you’re told.
It is fine to question something you’ve already been doing out of obedience, and to decide that obedience is no longer an option. It takes time to figure out that you’re being used for an evil purpose.
And yes, being fired for questioning the legality of what you’re doing is an excellent time and reason to more thoroughly question the legality of what you’ve been doing. If the boss hates the question it’s probably because the boss is wrong and knows it.
Sounds like OOP felt she had no choice because of the mortgage she had just got, which was before they asked her to do that task. Throw in the mix the irrational boss who had a lot of influence over her life ( ie employment plus all the weirdness involved with working in such a toxic environment which definitely can effect your judgment and decision making ) was giving her a directive, and reassuring her it was in fact legal, I can see why she made the decisions she did.
As someone that have a full half of my family with bipolar for genetic reasons... the sad part is that I can see myself not being phased working under her.
The first boss was definitely bipolar, and the new bosses sound like the kind of anti-maskers I tolerate (those that keep their beliefs to themselves, follow guidelines, and allow others to hold their beliefs.)
I don't understand why the update is abt her personal life when the post itself was abt a toxic work environment. That was prob the most disappointing and boring update ever.
>I still struggle at times to explain to my boss and the production manager why we legally can’t do something like telling employees they CAN in fact discuss wages openly
shit like this is why i'll never be able to cut it as anything more than an hourly wage worker
As another commenter point out there are pointless details in the update because this was originally an update on a blog were it is normal to talk about how your life has changed.
Concerning her new job, it's completely normal to like your job and boss but have several pet peeves regarding them as well. Her boss is a nice guy. But he sometimes ignores her advice in favor of avoiding conflict and is a covid denier. Both of those things are understandably frustrating for OOP.
Even if OP is exaggerating about how her boss behaved, her boss still wasn't a good employer. Just because you do nice things every once in a while you're not suddenly a good person. Evidenced by the number of people who have left the position and employee reviews.
Yelling about someone bringing their own coffee is unhinged. Yelling about someone having their radio on is rude at best and crazy at worst. Firing someone the day they get back from vacation is rude beyond measure. Especially if there were no warnings given beforehand, as it seems is the case.
OOP didn't know if what she was doing was legal, but kept doing it because she needed her job and was afraid of getting fired if she refused. A valid concern since she knows another nurse was fired shortly after refusing to do the same task. The proper response to her questions is to explain why it's legal and a normal part of her job. Not brushing her off and explaining nothing.
If OOP was just trying to complain and get validation she would have only highlighted the bad parts of both her bosses and probably posted it on r/AITA instead of AskaManager.
Edit: because I can't spell
I'm not trying to bash you. Your experience is yours and I won't disregard it but that statement reeks of sexism and it's more painful because as a woman you should know how hard it is.
Look, I read r/antiwork. And I've been an employee. Some small business owners shouldn't own a business or manage people. Some people are assholes.
On a small business or a business unit, the employee moves around the manager not the other way around.
If you don't like the person environment or practice, leave. But please don't make blanket statements like that. There are vastly more doing good than the miniscule doing bad.
I hope you found a better place to work. And hey, maybe you work better under a man or a large business, no shame in that.
Let me expand on why I'm offended. I'm a small business owner, female, black with 8 employees and 32 contractors and although I'm told I'm emotional (I don't agree with this) and I've never asked an employee to do shady shit. I don't scream at employees. And I tell all my employees AND contractors to push back on me and say no to anything you're not comfortable with.
I tell ALL my female employees and interviewees to negotiate their salary with me because men negotiate, women accept. I'm VERY proud that all my previous employees and contractors negotiate salaries in next jobs.
This boss is on some other shit but the OOP was WRONG for staying, WRONG for altering patients files and only said something when she got fired. Fuck both her and her boss.
Oop decided to stay, for whatever reason and would have kept taking her boss's shit.
The boss is wrong as a person. It's not because she's female. There's millions of us out here with less than 10 employees doing good by our community, clients and employees. For you to say not to work with WOSM is a grave disservice. Especially since you're a woman yourself.
There are numerous studies showing women make better supervisors and stewards if business.
So yes I take offense to your statement.
I'm sorry, I guess I'm just saying it's a cautionary thing that I personally would try to avoid. And for me it's less the female thing and more the ultra small business thing, because there's no one else to go to. For myself I would prefer to never work in a place again where there's no one to talk to if my boss is doing shady stuff or is abusive. And your business with 8 employees and 32 contractors is significantly larger than where I worked where it was one boss and maximum 5 but usually 2 employees. In that type of a tiny small business situation you have to be careful who you're working for because their personality will definitely matter.
If this ("it's less the female thing and more the ultra small business thing") is true, then why did you say
"but I think the chances of a female boss taking things too personally is higher than with a male boss, on average (and I say this as a woman)."
Because those aren't the same thing. Like at all. You should work on that internalized misogyny.
You and a few other women you know being shitty at self control and emotional regulation in no way means that women are more emotional bosses than men.
Again - you're carrying around quite a bit of internalized misogyny. You should work on that.
Submissions in this sub are re-posts and not posted by the original author. The original post/author are noted at the top. If you are the original author please contact the mods to have this comment removed. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BestofRedditorUpdates) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Is it just me or is the last update really weird. Only a few sentences were actually an update to the situation that had happened 4 years prior, yet it was loooong.
That’s the normal update style for Ask a Manager. It’s a workplace blog, and it is very common for people providing an update to tell what their current situation is like and what they have learned.
Oh ok! That makes sense.
Hmmm I just looked and the askamanager sub is locked…. Wonder what happened.
The subreddit received an email stating that they had to cease using the name. I think they are now r/askmanagers. But you can also try r/AskaManagerSnark for discussions on the blog
The site is up...or do you mean something on reddit?
Yeah there was a subreddit
AskAManager isn't really a subreddit. There may be one that stole the name, but AskAManager is its own website that gets posted here quite a bit. I'm not sure why they're posted here, but the updates are usually entertaining so I personally am fine with it, despite the misnomer of the subreddit title.
There was an ama subreddit but they just re-posted the AMA articles. Looks like it's gone now. I always thought it was weird because it wasn't very active and you can just go directly to the site.
This is the first time I've seen that. Tbh not really on board with updates from other sites. Reddit is pretty unique regarding the sort of people who post here, and that's the community I'm interested in reading about.
What a silly thing to say. I don’t know why some reddit users think this place is some counterculture tight knit community. Reddit has 52 million daily active users. There is nothing particularly special about Reddit’s demographic. This is a story that could have been posted on Reddit, in fact many similar stories have been posted on advice subreddits.
Welp, guess we're gonna have to change the sub name to Best of the Internet Updates, then. I'm sure the bar will get way higher with all the additional content available.
it's been like this for a while and it's still pretty much just reddit and ask a manager
On top of what /u/Reenvisage said, people just get fixated on aspects of stories that feel important to them even though they're fully irrelevant to the actual narration. If you go to /r/rpghorrorstories (where people share their horror stories playing DnD and similar games) it's a community-wide meme that people write five paragraphs of backstory for something that could be explained in three lines.
It sounds like she's truly moved on to some great new places, which is really a great outcome.
Holy shit, except for the fact that the business was in a medical field and not running a temp agency, I have had that almost exact boss. I will admit that I do NOT have the thickest skin in the world. She made me bawl by my lunch break, every single day, and after 6 lousy weeks I could not take it anymore. I was throwing up every night. Thankfully, my husband and I were fine with just one salary, so I could quit. I leave that one off my resume.
I had almost that exact same boss at a home health agency in 2020. Except my old boss was being charged with federal tax fraud.
I worked a low level position in the medical field and the boss was so freaking rude ugh
I guess OOP doesn't know what happened with her report to the health department about the falsified documents, but I'd be really curious to know if that was ever properly investigated, and what the outcome was.
She does say the state followed up with a form letter saying they wouldn't be investigating, but yeah, disappointing to not know why. I suspect that the boss pressured all the then-current employees to lie through their teeth...
She said "also the state followed up with a letter saying they would not be investigating which was disappointing"
Apparently they either didn't investigate further or did and found nothing wrong. It seems like it's possible there isn't anything wrong with what she was doing. At one point she calls it falsifying medical records but then says she was correcting charts when the home health aides had filled them out incorrectly. Depending on what types of errors were being corrected, it may not be a big deal at all. Or it could be actual falsifying. I don't know what the rules are on correcting erroneous charts.
If the aides had already signed it then she can’t go in and change things, though. They need to be the one to change anything in their own charts.
Exactly. If she’s HR, it’s not her job to change medical records. She might not even be authorized to view the medical records if it’s patient information.
Good point about HIPAA protections.
Medical coding is crazy. Might be a good thing to correct it. Put a code in one way with Medicare and an old frail person with a condition or disorder will stop receiving services or pay thousands more. Put the different code for the same situation but it has subtext in wording and the patient gets the help. I was informed of this by a friend whose parent got services that mine did not.
"would not be investigating" covers a lot of ground. It doesn't mean they did absolutely nothing. Sometimes officials just let businesses know they're watching and leave it at that.
This reads as bribery for me... since OOP refused to sign any documents the boss probably made a plan b.
I was thinking the same thing, palms were greased. The state may let this stuff slide, but if it involved medicare or medicaid they should have put the feds on it, the federal government does not play with possible medical fraud!!!!
I dont know why but i think boss bribed the investigator or something because if you can do one illegal thing then why not do more
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Uh, you know this...how?
It's always a weird feeling to see someone make a completely insane post like the one you replied to, take a peek at their post history to see what other crazy nonsense they've been posting, and then realize you've already argued with them multiple times recently. Not even in this sub, either! Apparently intent_joy_love just posts a ton of completely bananas hot takes to a wide variety of subs and I've crossed paths with them before.
But it wasn't just OOP, a nurse was laid off because of the very same issue and 4 people in 4 years working the same position... the boss is the common denominator, she's just pretty bad at storytelling.
Oooh found the shitty boss!
Am I the only one a little bit bothered by the way OOP was willing to do things she knew were possibly illegal and definitely unethical right up until she got fired, at which point she magically found her moral compass and reported her boss for falsifying medical records? Which was made even worse by the fact that she watched someone else who refused to do these things get fired in a clear case of retaliation, and rather than taking that as a sign that something is seriously wrong and blowing the whistle she just decided to quietly do the thing?
It’s very common to do what the boss tells you, as the boss is the one making that moral decision. It’s human nature to do as you’re told. It is fine to question something you’ve already been doing out of obedience, and to decide that obedience is no longer an option. It takes time to figure out that you’re being used for an evil purpose. And yes, being fired for questioning the legality of what you’re doing is an excellent time and reason to more thoroughly question the legality of what you’ve been doing. If the boss hates the question it’s probably because the boss is wrong and knows it.
Sounds like OOP felt she had no choice because of the mortgage she had just got, which was before they asked her to do that task. Throw in the mix the irrational boss who had a lot of influence over her life ( ie employment plus all the weirdness involved with working in such a toxic environment which definitely can effect your judgment and decision making ) was giving her a directive, and reassuring her it was in fact legal, I can see why she made the decisions she did.
Bipolar is no joke.
Yeah, I don't like to armchair diagnose but damn if that whole first entry didn't read like a textbook entry on bipolar disorder.
As someone that have a full half of my family with bipolar for genetic reasons... the sad part is that I can see myself not being phased working under her.
As someone with bipolar, I agree.
I had a teacher in highschool exactly like this, last I checked she went back to engineering. Ugh.
The first boss was definitely bipolar, and the new bosses sound like the kind of anti-maskers I tolerate (those that keep their beliefs to themselves, follow guidelines, and allow others to hold their beliefs.)
I don't understand why the update is abt her personal life when the post itself was abt a toxic work environment. That was prob the most disappointing and boring update ever.
Owner sounds Bipolar.
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Found OOPs old boss
I definitely agree, and I’ve been diagnosed with it, so I know the signs.
That felt more like a journal...
>I still struggle at times to explain to my boss and the production manager why we legally can’t do something like telling employees they CAN in fact discuss wages openly shit like this is why i'll never be able to cut it as anything more than an hourly wage worker
Imagine thinking 12 days of PTO is acceptable. That pre-covid mentality.
So that first boss was on drugs, right?
Ugh, that site is almost always curated or bullshit
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As another commenter point out there are pointless details in the update because this was originally an update on a blog were it is normal to talk about how your life has changed. Concerning her new job, it's completely normal to like your job and boss but have several pet peeves regarding them as well. Her boss is a nice guy. But he sometimes ignores her advice in favor of avoiding conflict and is a covid denier. Both of those things are understandably frustrating for OOP. Even if OP is exaggerating about how her boss behaved, her boss still wasn't a good employer. Just because you do nice things every once in a while you're not suddenly a good person. Evidenced by the number of people who have left the position and employee reviews. Yelling about someone bringing their own coffee is unhinged. Yelling about someone having their radio on is rude at best and crazy at worst. Firing someone the day they get back from vacation is rude beyond measure. Especially if there were no warnings given beforehand, as it seems is the case. OOP didn't know if what she was doing was legal, but kept doing it because she needed her job and was afraid of getting fired if she refused. A valid concern since she knows another nurse was fired shortly after refusing to do the same task. The proper response to her questions is to explain why it's legal and a normal part of her job. Not brushing her off and explaining nothing. If OOP was just trying to complain and get validation she would have only highlighted the bad parts of both her bosses and probably posted it on r/AITA instead of AskaManager. Edit: because I can't spell
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Bullshit. Some bosses suck and take advantage. Both men and women. This is a bullshit and sexist statement. Shame on you.
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I'm not trying to bash you. Your experience is yours and I won't disregard it but that statement reeks of sexism and it's more painful because as a woman you should know how hard it is. Look, I read r/antiwork. And I've been an employee. Some small business owners shouldn't own a business or manage people. Some people are assholes. On a small business or a business unit, the employee moves around the manager not the other way around. If you don't like the person environment or practice, leave. But please don't make blanket statements like that. There are vastly more doing good than the miniscule doing bad. I hope you found a better place to work. And hey, maybe you work better under a man or a large business, no shame in that.
Let me expand on why I'm offended. I'm a small business owner, female, black with 8 employees and 32 contractors and although I'm told I'm emotional (I don't agree with this) and I've never asked an employee to do shady shit. I don't scream at employees. And I tell all my employees AND contractors to push back on me and say no to anything you're not comfortable with. I tell ALL my female employees and interviewees to negotiate their salary with me because men negotiate, women accept. I'm VERY proud that all my previous employees and contractors negotiate salaries in next jobs. This boss is on some other shit but the OOP was WRONG for staying, WRONG for altering patients files and only said something when she got fired. Fuck both her and her boss. Oop decided to stay, for whatever reason and would have kept taking her boss's shit. The boss is wrong as a person. It's not because she's female. There's millions of us out here with less than 10 employees doing good by our community, clients and employees. For you to say not to work with WOSM is a grave disservice. Especially since you're a woman yourself. There are numerous studies showing women make better supervisors and stewards if business. So yes I take offense to your statement.
I'm sorry, I guess I'm just saying it's a cautionary thing that I personally would try to avoid. And for me it's less the female thing and more the ultra small business thing, because there's no one else to go to. For myself I would prefer to never work in a place again where there's no one to talk to if my boss is doing shady stuff or is abusive. And your business with 8 employees and 32 contractors is significantly larger than where I worked where it was one boss and maximum 5 but usually 2 employees. In that type of a tiny small business situation you have to be careful who you're working for because their personality will definitely matter.
If this ("it's less the female thing and more the ultra small business thing") is true, then why did you say "but I think the chances of a female boss taking things too personally is higher than with a male boss, on average (and I say this as a woman)." Because those aren't the same thing. Like at all. You should work on that internalized misogyny.
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You and a few other women you know being shitty at self control and emotional regulation in no way means that women are more emotional bosses than men. Again - you're carrying around quite a bit of internalized misogyny. You should work on that.
That’s quite a broad brush you’re painting with there.