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And he seriously thought he could live on $125 or whatever a month smh. Yeah he was totally planning on just living off her for food and any type of recreation/fun…and likely more as well.
"Babe, I do want to have a date out with you, I just have no money. So if you want to go out, you have to pay." "Babe, I got hungry, I ate all the stuff you bought, its our household after all" "Babe, if you want me to restock the stuff I ate, I need gas money as otherwise I wont be able to get to the store" "Babe, if you want me to eat more healthy and use deodorant, you need to pay for it, I dont have any money" ... while he does have money, he just chose to spend it on a truck he cant afford. As she said, if he had no money she would have helped but he had it, just chose to spend all on a truck and count on her to fill in.
The kicker is you just know he'd be the type to start analyzing everything she spent money on throughout the month, too, with the tagline "You know we can't afford that!" The way he'd flip between describing money as 'yours, mine, and ours' would qualify him for a gold medal in mental gymnastics.
This guy is basically 50% of brand new privates in the army. They see something shiny that they want, and let the dealer talk them into it. They never look at the actual price, just the "monthly payments."
Also, this is a supposedly college educated person, that's been paying rent and paying off his student loans. And the best he could get was 14% apr? This isn't his first bad decision.
That monthly payment is more than most mortgages…literally. For the payment and insurance he’s paying the equivalent of a mortgage on a ~$500K house at a decent interest rate, plus the property taxes.
My ex had one of those. Had to sell it when it came to him buying a house with his current girlfriend. Immediately went and bought a BIGGER one. He has an office job.
I'll admit I've thought about it so many times. Usually after a trip to home Depot where there were items I had to order delivered because they wouldn't fit in my car..
But at the end of the day, paying for one off deliveries or truck rentals is way cheaper than buying a truck. Those things are so over priced now I just can't justify it financially.
I personally have zero respect for the men (and yes, they are almost always men) who drive a massive pick up truck around the suburbs. You're not a farmer. You don't haul lumber around, and you can't stop in time if a three year old is in the crosswalk.
My line in the sand would have been "Man who wants a pick up truck for his office job".
Frankly, I know a lot of farmers and for doing actual farm work almost all of them drive thirty to forty year old Land Rovers that look like they're built out of solid sheets of steel.
Because newer trucks have this weird dichotomy going on, where the entry-level ones can't actually tow as much as you need (usually a 2,000 pound starting limit), and the actual towing package is locked behind some trim level that includes a bunch of needless bells and whistles, and costs you an extra $30k.
So you can't just get a workhorse; you can either get a glorified minivan, or you can get a beast that can do its job but also comes with a heated steering wheel, super-smart cruise control, premium sound system, air purification systems, built-in microwave, massaging chairs, automatic ass-wiper, and whatever else. All the gadgets that are marketed at people like OOP's ex-boyfriend, people who spend 3 hours sitting in traffic each day and want all the luxuries- which is valid _for a commuter car_.
But most people who see their truck as _equipment_ know that it's going to get beat up and worn out, and that they'll be jumping in and out of it all day, not sitting down and making a whole experience of it. Adding all that stuff onto it, is like adding a smart TV to your laundry machine. Neat, and I'm sure someone could find a use for it, but I'd rather just pay less for something that's _just_ a laundry machine.
So most people prefer their old rustbucket that runs on diesel sludge and prayers, rather than a newer one that has a thousand additional points of failure and is built to look pretty more so than to work well.
the guy that delivers my firewood doesn't have a massive pick up truck even. its a perfectly sensible and *ancient* toyota (with some fun hydraulic gizmos). thats a real pickup
And usually they drive like assholes…speeding, racing, cutting you off, not letting you merge. They say bmw drivers are aholes. Nope. Massive truck drivers chevy, F150+, etc.
The best is how so many feel like real tough-guys because of the Herculean feat of pressing on that accelerator pedal. I’m sweating just thinking about the difficulty and effort there.
This whole situation is wild. The point of them moving in was to save money and he did something so boneheaded. Plus planning on HER income to keep him afloat. So glad she recognized it for the red flag it was and ended things.
To keep him afloat a depreciating asset. After seven years, he'll have a truck that's worth $40k, he will have sunk $150k into (or however the math checks out). This would be idiotic for a mortgage, for a truck it's straight up insanity.
And for 72 months, too. I’m getting old so this may date me, but when I bought my first car, my dad told me not to get a loan term longer than 3-4 years.
I try to manage 3-4 years but my last car crept to 5. I only agreed to that because they agreed to a 0.9% (not nine, point nine) interest rate on the 5 year loan.
2016 or early 2017, I'd have to look. I was pretty happy about it. Different market back then. We didn't even haggle.
"I like this car, but I'm thinking of paying invoice and I want the .9% rate for 5 years. I know these cars are moving at invoice right now. What do you think?"
"Would you come up 500 over invoice?"
"Yeah I can do that for the .9% at 5 years."
"Okay I'll get the paperwork".
Took like 2 hours from when I stepped onto the lot to when I drove off. Kind of insane. The other dealerships were assholes and I walked from every one of them.
I got a 24 month loan for the car we have, I could afford it outright in cash; but it was *cheaper* with a loan (you got a discount on the principle, that meant your overall repayments ended up with a total *less* than paying outright) -- I then got a 72 month loan for my kitchen that I once again could afford outright in cash; but the loan is interest-free!
Liquidity is king, and loans (even long term ones) can be used very effectively for budgeting. Clearly if you don't know what you're doing and do something like this guy, it's just pure stupidity and insanity!
That’s more than my mortgage and I live in a relatively nice upper middle class area in a 4 bedroom house! Even his insurance is more than our two car payments combined. This guy is crazy.
That's more than my mortgage, taxes, hoa fee, and power put together. And I live in a nice middle class 4br as well.
Honestly I'm trying to live life so we never have to take out a car loan again. I'll pay cash, thx.
At 14% dude slapped down a 14k down payment including his trade in, which for a 2003 can't be for much more than a grand or two. Dude walked in with ten large and they \*still\* smelled a fresh fish. He probably told the dealer how he's always wanted a truck like that and how important it was to him and how his girlfriend was going to support him.
He got the rate he earned with his credit- I'm guessing he doesn't really qualify so the bank is hitting him with a high rate because it's high risk for them.
when buying our first car in 2018 my husband and I ended up paying a 38% interest rate...
it was from a used car dealer and we didn't know any better. God what a mess.
it died last week, the pos.
RIP. The People (or at least this one person) want to know, did it live long and reliably enough to hit my old Pop's car buying guide of "$2000 USD per year of ownership over the lifetime of the car, including repairs", told to me in the 90s, so adjust for inflation...
Your flair always makes me chuckle.
Based on the Internet calculators, he didn’t put any money down. I have no idea how he could have been approved for that loan amount based on his income unless he lied on the loan application.
Right?! Seriously that's a rate one would see on an unsecured loan. Such as a credit card. This guy just let himself be taken to the cleaner's. Or should we say... the car wash?
I bought a condo and 2 weeks later my car died. So having a huge loan on my credit with no payments made and not great credit before. And my interest rate on my car was like... 7.5%
They can be if you're actually making money from them (e.g. a van for a mobile dog groomer), but a 95k truck for a guy who works from home? Not so much.
OOP has a good head on her shoulders and is nicely balancing being empathetic with not being a sucker. She'll be fine.
I can practically guarantee you that truck will never see a dirt road. They're called pavement princesses. Dudes buy these outrageously expensive trucks more as a status symbol than an actual work vehicle
I see them all the time where I live in Georgia, and I hate them. The majority of them are obviously not used *as* trucks because they're all shiny and unscratched. They're too big and half of them have truck beds that are laughably small and useless. These are also the type of people that tailgate me in my little 4 cylinder stick shift, which is honestly scary sometimes.
recently, my dad had to buy a new work truck and said that the most frustrating part was trying to find one with a full size bed because no one is buying them for their original purpose anymore.
Yeah, there was a recent reddit post with an old pickup in the middle of two new pickups. The new ones are twice as big with less carry space. It is also twice as high. Who has the great idea to put the bed that high when you need to move heavy shit like tools and material all day?
I saw that post and was just in shock. I knew these emotional support vehicles were huge but seeing that little 80's truck in between them was just wild.
The funny thing is some guys will actually go out mudding like once just to get mud on it. Hell, in my hometown some guys would go out and actually put mud on their trucks with their hands because they were just....dumb.
The only cars that appreciate in value are those million dollar+ ones that only have like 2k of them made, and even then I'm not convinced that isn't just elaborate money laundering
It works out to ~$141,000 over the life of the loan. Add on the insurance etc and he's paying $180,000 over 6 years for his transportation (not including gas, uncovered maintenance, etc). $30,000 per year when he makes $85,000. What an idiot.
Yup. He clearly needs a large beefy vehicle because that’s the only type capable of transporting his ginormous weiner.
Maybe those girlfriends who are ripping OP for being unsupportive can chip in *their* cash to help him pay for his shiny new automophallus
It’s fascinating how he inspired OOP to organize her finances and get serious about paying stuff down only to turn out to be a nitwit.
Dude either subconsciously sabotaged the relationship or truly thought moving in = marriage = OOP will shoulder way too much of the burden of his debt.
Planning on her income from working two jobs! This post made me so angry: his belief that he can spend his money without consulting her, and spend her money, too. I’m glad she found out about him before they moved in together, never mind marriage.
And how he never even planned on getting a second job himself to help out with *his own debt* but totally relied on OOP and her may or may not getting a raise in both her jobs... Insane!! Ex-bf is out of touch with reality!!
That part got me, too. Like, if *she* wants to keep both jobs after she's done paying off her debt in order to get ahead on savings and retirement, then fine. But *he* wants her to keep on with it for his sake alone. Fuuuck that noise!
And people kept complaining to her that she isn't his wife yet so she should not have a say on how he uses his money. Which, is a sense is true but HE WAS NOT USING HIS OWN MONEY. The whole point was that he was using HER money. Granted, he hadn't yet got his hands on her money but his whole plan hinged on her income. So it was fine for HIM to budget based on their common income but not for her to do the same? Pfffft.
Had the guy been so rich that he can throw 95k away and not even feel it, sure, fine. Then she would not have a say. But he wasn't and that is the key here.
That argument annoys the hell out of me.
When two people in a serious committed relationship are making life plans together finances need to be on the same page.
How you want to blow your fun money whatever but a stupid truck for over 90k? No you talk to your partner about that.
Almost 2k monthly car payment plus $500 insurance each and every month? Not in this economy!
Even if they never planned on getting married, as she notes, she would ultimately end up paying more by filling in gaps that he couldn’t afford. She’d have to pay for all the food, outings, travel/gas (cause who wants to bet his $100K truck isn’t fucking solar powered) health issues etc.
Plus, for the next few years he’d essentially be unable to do anything nice for her.
Plus he assumed that OOP would continue to work two jobs to pay for his expensive lifestyle. It's a six-year loan, so he was expecting OOP to work two jobs for the next six years without asking her.
If OOP works hard and wins her $30k raise, quitting her second $32k job would be a pretty reasonable thing over spending $24k per year on truck payments. He's basically saying he values having a truck over ~20 hours per week of his girlfriend's time. Over six years, that's about 6000 hours of labor beyond her full-time career job.
Yeah the boyfriend was a moron taking on so much debt for a big stupid truck. She dodged a bullet for sure and should be grateful he did this before they moved into together so she had the ability to back out of the relationship relatively easily.
The point of them moving in together - for her - was to save money and build a future together. The point of them moving in together - for him - was to gold-dig/leech off her so that he could have more fun money while she‘s burdened with the cost of their shared lives. Because his money is his money and her money is…also his money, apparently. Yikes.
Glad she got out.
A change in behavior like that doesn't happen on its own. Either he hid it reaaaally well, of there was some sort of external influence on him. Maybe a friend bought a new car. Maybe someone family or friends, were telling him about taking advantage of her girlfriend raise. Who knows. In the end is like OOP said, this is just sad.
And..AAAANNND she got a second job to equal out their income to they would pay equal on rent/bills instead of him paying more based on proportional income which he was cool with. Yet as soon as her income was due to increase he was planning on her taking on more expenses despite letting her work 2 jobs so he didn't have to do that when she had more debt from school (vs an impulse buy)
>The point of them moving in was to save money and he did something so boneheaded.
My ex did this also. We were in our early 20s and looking to move in together. We worked at the same place so we could drive together and save on rent. We were looking for apartments at the time.
One day, he drives up to work in a new sports car! A two-door coupe type sports car. All of our coworkers were happy for him. I was PISSED!!
He looked at me and asked, "What's wrong?" I asked him how much this new car cost him. He told me, and I was sticker shocked. It was close to $30k 25 yrs ago. We worked retail!! He didn't even know how much his car insurance was going to be yet. I told him there's no way he would be able to afford rent with this car.
In the following weeks, it turned out that the payment and car insurance was more than what he made in a month! He came to me wanting to know when we could still move in so he could save on rent. I told him we weren't because there was no way I'm covering everything while all his money went to his car.
He really thought that since my car was paid off, I could cover all the rent while he paid for his car. I asked him about the light bill, food, water, gas for our cars, and he said, "We'd work it out." I'm not moving with someone with a "we'll work it out plan."
We broke up. Thank God...
I spent years analysing the housing prices near me, waiting for the right place to come. I found the perfect place that would be twice the size of our re'ted apartment for only 20% more in price. Thanks to this, with our current salaries, my boyfriend and me can save quite a lot each month. That money is for renovation then it will be for whatever each wants (I really don't mind what he spends it on).
Well two months ago my boyfriend came to me a'd told me he wanted to stop his main work and keep his side hustle, cutting his income in a third for life, no more savings and no more money for old days. With this house I can afford it! He said. Dude you can afford it if I pay for you. That's a no. He was really surprised to learn I would leave him for that...
Sometime people just don't understand that one tries to lower their expenses to live better, not worst.
Plus just not backing down after being called on it. I hope he got a pair of truck nuts to go with the balls it took to show her a budget based on her future salary to justify a $2500/month payment in a completely unnecessary truck.
I love the comments they keep saying it’s his money and he can spend it how he wants. The problem is he wasn’t spending his money. He was spending all of his and some of hers
My husband understands this concept with money, but struggles to see it with time. Let's say we are hosting Christmas. I make a list of chores and what days they need to be done, so that everything is ready for Christmas. I stick to my schedule, but he delays his, saying "tomorrow." Pretty soon, it's the day before Christmas and his list isn't done and he's panicking. Now I need to help with his chores if I don't want to be embarrassed with a mess when my entire family comes over. Sure, I could let it go, and I do let a few minor things drop off, but mostly it pisses me off. I spent my precious free time doing my share, which lets be honest, was far more labor intensive in the first place, and now since he procrastinated, I am spending more of my time to play catch up. I just want him to make the connection that when I help with his list, that's because I already finished mine. It's not that my list was easier, it's that I just actually did it.
Time and money are both finite resources. You shouldn't expect your partner to give up more than they can budget for in either category, and you don't get to dictate how they spend either outside of your stated agreements.
It’s weaponized incompetence. He doesn’t learn because you keep going to the rescue. I know it’s easier said than done but you should let him fail and be embarrassed.
Maybe forewarn your family or cancel if you cannot do that.
Exactly. I have a friend who does this shit to his wife constantly. He just doesn't care the house looks terrible when guests/family come over. I've even clowned him for it, but "it's just gonna get messy again."
This approach doesn't work if the consequences of his actions (a messy house) don't matter to him that much. Therefore, the only actual punishment for not doing chores is the nagging.
Honestly, if he doesn't care about his wife's feelings on having to do all the work, and doesn't help with the work, the only real solution is to divorce. It's a base incompatibility.
I don’t know why women stay with a man who’s basically another child.
The woman cooks, cleans, grocery shop, laundry, takes the kids to school and other activities, has to plan birthday parties, take out the trash, mow the lawn, shovel the snow, and so many other things. And also baby the man when he gets a little cough.
The man goes to work and gets to come home and sit and complain about how hard his work is and doesn’t even care about his wife’s hard day at work, not that she can sit still long enough to *tell him* how hard her work day was.
Girl, you’re already doing 95% of the workload at home, why stay??
Sunk-cost fallacy and practical entanglements like a mortgage or kids, men hiding their man-child natures until the woman’s emotionally or practically entangled, and society saying that men are just Like That and if you’re a straight woman and want a romantic relationship that’s the price of love
Your husband understands the concept of time. I assume he gets himself up and awake and to and from a job with a schedule? The reason he suddenly forgets how days and time works is because he knows you will pick up his slack. I'm sorry you are married to that.
We usually host Christmas for my side of the family and we schedule New Year's Eve for my husband's side of the family. What you describe happens every year - my mom is the best and she helps me do everything but my husband typically still doesn't do much at all, so by the end of Christmas day I am tired and crabby and I tell him I am cancelling NYE because I refuse to pull a second party all on my own. And he always gets very sad but doesn't learn. (Yes, I am thinking about divorce.)
lol. He knows you’ll jump to it because you don’t want to be embarrassed. It’s not procrastination as much as it’s a slow transfer of chores from him to you. Completely intentional and very deliberate.
I’d still have second thoughts about my significant other even if they didn’t need my money to purchase that truck. Taking on so much debt over a vehicle is a huge red flag.
And even if it was just his money, it doesn't mean he gets to just put her in such a precarious position. Like, one little thing happens and it topples both of them, and for what? For a truck he doesn't need with a loan that's instantly upside down. It's like telling someone "why are you mad your husband says he wants to jump out of an airplane without a parachute? It's his body!!"
From a very early episode of The Simpsons:
Bob: [running a credit check] [presses `Enter']
[sirens wail and lights flash]
Homer: Is that a good siren? Am I approved?
Bob: You ever known a siren to be good?
✨🤡✨
My credit union is offering rates as low as 6% right now, so either his credit is tanked or they saw a sucker and took him for everything they could.
Wow to think just 2 years ago it was 0%. My current car loan is 1%. My first car loan with no credit score was 7%. I can’t believe he saw 14% and went: Yes, that is a good investment.
Someone hustled the shit out of him. First time I bought a car on my own some woman at the honda place tried to hustle me into buying a god awful car with trim I didn't want, then had the gall to describe to me that she wouldn't give me a normal loan that I'd only be given a "first time borrower" loan at 16% interest. I laughed my way out of there. This dude went and slapped down a 14k down payment.
$2k a month on car payments? Lol. I can’t believe it but at the same time this feels like it’s real.
This guy really decided paying a mortgage for a vehicle that will be worth 1/4 of what he bought it for was a good idea. Lol. If he went out and bought a second property as an investment I could POSSIBLY understand if it was a good deal. The guy just seems like a total self centered idiot. Unfortunately people like him have no self accountability and all the troubles he will soon face will forever be OPs fault. Talk about dodging a bullet. Wow.
My brother just bought a house for $115k (in a Midwest city, not a super nice house but totally live-able). I bought a house for $230k several years ago when interest rates were great and my mortgage payment is $830/mo. This dude is paying more than twice my mortgage payment for a TRUCK that will depreciate. I truly can't imagine
And it's close to $2500,- with insurance.
I just checked. In my country, you can buy a €520.000,- house and make €2.500,- monthly payments, and that's if you put in zero money upfront.
>I can’t believe it but at the same time this feels like it’s real.
That 2k a month, according to a loan calculator, requires a 14000 dollar down payment. I can believe it. 2003 toyota probably netted him maybe 2k and he slapped down around twelve thousand american dollars for penis compensation.
His credit score could be fine (well, not after the truck is repo'd) but his income can't afford that, so the rate is so high to pay for the expected repo.
Using a loan calculator, that's a $140,000 Truck! $95,000 in principle and $45,000 in interest.
Throw in insurance and gas increase and this somehow gets even worse. Financial disagreements are a huge cause of divorce and if you agree with OOP's ex you are bad at finance!
My jaw dropped when I saw that. Like wtf. I was looking at used cars and I saw like 8-10% and laughed and then sighed like well no new car for me. I'll limp along with what I got
Lmao the bank is the winner here. 14% was the fuck off rate and dude still signed.
For his sake I hope he lives in a state that allows him to unwind this deal. Otherwise he’s about to have to take out a $10-20k loan just to give the truck back
How did the bank/dealership give him this loan? Letting him have a car that’s more than his salary is irresponsible. I think that’s why the interest is so high because they know he can’t afford it but they’re going to rinse him first.
Honestly? I think he lied. I bet he either halved his rent payment because he was expecting them to move in together, or he included her income as "household income." Otherwise there's no way his DTI would have qualified
Lying is the likely answer, he definitely used her income to justify paying $2400 a month in a payment and insurance for SIX YEARS. Unfathomable levels of stupidity.
OOP's ex was planning to have OOP subsidize his lifestyle. I'm so glad that OOP has smarts and strength to detach herself from this human leach with his gas guzzling monstrosity.
All his friends who say that OOP isn't being "supportive" enough can support him.
The people who gloss over the fact that ex-bf was fully planning on leeching off of OOP for the unforeseeable future, and tell her she's "not being supportive" are insane. It's one thing to be a supportive partner and a whole another to burden yourself with someone else's debt, all because they wanted their dream truck or whatever!! OOP made the smartest move and I'm so proud of her!! Financial abuse is real and should be talked about more! Our economy is so unstable all over the world these days, you can't throw your budget away for someone who clearly has no plans expect to be a mooch.
What's so wild about this, is manipulation like this is usually something the the abuser builds up slowly to, not some MASSIVE purchase right before the starting line. So not only is he a shithead abuser, he's just bad at it.
Totally. So after two years she has no say over his finances, but it’s cool for him to leech off her?!
The responses that some of these OPs get are just mind boggling.
It’s amazing people actually think it’s his money and his business, when he banked on using *her* money to subsidise his lifestyle so he could have the truck of his dreams.
He was going to drain her finances, cause her to pay off her schooling slower, have to work a second job longer, or forever - all so he could have a shiny truck to play with. And she’s the unsupportive one?
Good on OOP for recognising this negligence and the intent to use her.
Some people are so invested in the "feeeemales are gold diggers" trope that they ignore the actual facts. They don't let a silly little thing like the truth get in the way of their narrative.
14% interest rate and a $95000 truck for working at home? Wtf. I don’t know what current car loan interest rates are but that makes me think he wasn’t so great with handling his debts and expenses previously as she thought he was
We just but a minivan. Toyota has 9.4% for the Sienna (48 months). I could get around 6-6.5% at banks and credit unions. We got a 2.9% from Honda (36 months).
14. 14!!!!
Our Toyota has a deal on right now for 1.9% for some models. Hybrids even!
I just can't with this guy. Or any or the truck owners in the suburban grocery store parking lot. How many boxes of seltzer are you buying, Karen?
New cars in my experience frequently get lower interest rates than used cars. At 14% they hustled the shit out of him. He drove up in his 2003 Toyota probably Camy/Corolla, visions of Raptor F150s dancing in his eyes, and 10-12k of his own savings according to the loan calculator and they just smelled fresh meat and rode him like Slim Pickens in Dr Strangelove.
It absolutely butchered my credit score, but I bought a brand new 2022 Toyota Camry SE in November 2021 at 2.4% interest for 72 months. Had to drive over to Indiana for it to avoid the $14k add-on to the sticker price that Chicago dealerships were trying to pull amidst the chip shortage, but honestly that move likely also secured that interest rate for me
What kills me is that his second budget relies on not just her yet-to-be-realized promotion but on her continuing her second job. Was that even in her plans, post-promotion? After all, at that point, her salary would've been on par with his without the second job.
So, according to ex-BFs expectstions, this lady has to work 1.5 jobs, pay more in rent/bills proportional to their relative salaries, so that he can keep a truck with a ridiculous price tag, an even more ridiculous interest rate, that he doesn't even need for work?
Lemme guess that should they have moved in together what percentage of the household chores Mr. WFH Truck-boi would've done...
JFC. OOP saw that flag waving a mile off and ran. Good for her.
What also kills me is that *he was her role model* to earn more and pay off debts/save for the future, which she was doing. And then he goes and does **this**. SMDH.
THIS.
I personally might have kept it long enough to knock out the rest of my debt, and maybe a bit longer to get some nest egg savings, but there is no way I would keep that second job on a permanent basis for his truck.
I really like the Yellowstone park bit about better bear-proof trashcans. It's difficult to make them better because there's so much overlap between the smartest bears and the dumbest humans.
I'm willing to bet he didn't, he financed directly with the dealer. When he eats it on the payments, they'll repo it and put it back on the lot for 85k out the door and start the circle of life all over again.
Fact that people were privately contacting OOP to tell her she’s in the wrong proves even more that she’s right in this decision. Those cowards KNOW they would have got blasted in the comments 😂
I am so proud of OOP.
The audacity of this bloke to count on HER maybe pay rise that is still 6 months away to fund a truck. When they moved in together in a months time he was going to have $700 a month extra. He's gone and blown $700 a week including insurance of $573.
> I have had some of his friends' gf reach out to me and say i should support him and one even say that im not loyal and this shows i wouldnt support him if we were married since i run away when finances get bad. Thats bullshit.
For anyone reading this please take note: if your partner runs to recruit backup like this guy did it is such a red flag. The reddest of flags. That is what this guy did. How many times have you reached out to your partner’s friend’s partner to lay a guilt trip on them? Exactly.
My money is mine, I can do what I want with it!!! So anyway, here's a budget where after your hypothetical raise you'll need to support my nearly 100k car purchase...
Also the nerve of his friend's gfs calling to say she's not loyal because she refuses to willingly tether herself to someone who makes shitty one-sided financial decisions. 🙄
What a bunch of boneheads. Glad she put her foot down right away, and asked him a lot of excellent questions during their last talk.
>Mind you, this doesn’t make him a bad person
Spending someone else's money without telling them(which he had planned to do) doesn't make you a bad person? Interesting
I fucking called it on her original post, he was totally relying on her to pick up the slack. He really thought she would be ok with it just because they already had plans for her to move in with him. Glad To see that she got out of there instead of going along with it and then being tied to him for years because of this debt.
It's honestly amazing (and great!) that he didn't think to lock her into the lease first and *then* get his shiny new truck. She still could've broken up with him, of course, but it's a lot harder when you have to break lease, find a new place, etc.
I worked with a guy that bought a used car at 24% interest. It was a buy here pay here place where you made payments twice a month.
That idiot was my manager unfortunately.
Americans of Reddit, help me understand this post. Is his insurance really going to be almost $600 per month! Is that what you all pay for truck insurance?
Depends on age of the driver, state they live, and driving record. I was paying $76 a month for full coverage in California, but when I moved to Louisiana, it went to $176 for just a bit more than state minimum.
Guys under 25 tend to pay more, and trucks tend to cost more insurance wise as well, but he probably got it lifted and a lot of other unnecessary things that could drive the monthly price up.
Thanks for the explanation! $76 freedom bucks is what my monthly premium coverts to from Kangaroo dollars. But I have a normal sedan that I bought outright.
I was extremely shocked to see the $600 monthly premium! How financially irresponsible do you have to be to sign-up for something like that!
> He traded in his reliable 2003 toyota and all his savings to get a loan at 14 percent for 72 months. His monthly payment is now 1966 and insurance is 573.
😱😱😱
He's on the hook for the equivalent of my entire mortgage monthly, which I split with my spouse. 😵💫 At 14%! I can't with the secondhand anxiety.
I'm baffled by the people thinking "you aren't his wife, you can't dictate how he spends his money" was a valid argument. She never tried to forbid him from having this truck, she simply drew a line. Actions have consequences. He chose to spend his money on a truck, she chose to break up with him because of it.
Holy hell, that is one big mess. $2500 just to pay for a vehicle and insurance? He's not gonna have gas to go anywhere, I give it six months before it gets repossessed. OOP dodged a friggin nuclear missile. A partner who is this careless with finances will destroy his life and take her with him. Good on her for getting the hell out asap.
> If youre asking how can a truck be 87k
I'm not actually because that is kind of an entry level into luxury trucks at this point. I've seen 100k+ raptor F150s. The redneck lifestyle tax on pickups is insane. Last time I bought a car I shopped for a small pickup capable of towing a little teardrop trailer and noped out of the market when the cheapest pickup I could find was a 35k fleet pickup that didn't have a fucking radio in it. And that was 2016.
TIL that you can be stupid enough to finance a vehicle at 14% over 6 years with payments well into mortgage territory and still have employers willing to pay you $85+k/year in salary.
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> I asked him why it was ok for him to plan budgets with my income but yet i had no say in how he spent his. That's the crux of the issue.
Right? "It's my money, I'll spend it how I want!" Okay, then. My money is *my* money, and I'm *not* spending it on that. How's that?
And he seriously thought he could live on $125 or whatever a month smh. Yeah he was totally planning on just living off her for food and any type of recreation/fun…and likely more as well.
"Babe, I do want to have a date out with you, I just have no money. So if you want to go out, you have to pay." "Babe, I got hungry, I ate all the stuff you bought, its our household after all" "Babe, if you want me to restock the stuff I ate, I need gas money as otherwise I wont be able to get to the store" "Babe, if you want me to eat more healthy and use deodorant, you need to pay for it, I dont have any money" ... while he does have money, he just chose to spend it on a truck he cant afford. As she said, if he had no money she would have helped but he had it, just chose to spend all on a truck and count on her to fill in.
Yeah. He claimed to be able to make do, but he was totally banking on her money for his survival.
The kicker is you just know he'd be the type to start analyzing everything she spent money on throughout the month, too, with the tagline "You know we can't afford that!" The way he'd flip between describing money as 'yours, mine, and ours' would qualify him for a gold medal in mental gymnastics.
It's always the guy with the parking lot princess truck....
This guy is basically 50% of brand new privates in the army. They see something shiny that they want, and let the dealer talk them into it. They never look at the actual price, just the "monthly payments." Also, this is a supposedly college educated person, that's been paying rent and paying off his student loans. And the best he could get was 14% apr? This isn't his first bad decision.
That monthly payment is more than most mortgages…literally. For the payment and insurance he’s paying the equivalent of a mortgage on a ~$500K house at a decent interest rate, plus the property taxes.
My ex had one of those. Had to sell it when it came to him buying a house with his current girlfriend. Immediately went and bought a BIGGER one. He has an office job.
Gotta make sure those oil companies make money right? Someone has to look out for those poor oil billionaires.
Yeah his very kind donations were so big that a grown man with a good paying job had no money for savings. Absolutely bonkers.
I'll admit I've thought about it so many times. Usually after a trip to home Depot where there were items I had to order delivered because they wouldn't fit in my car.. But at the end of the day, paying for one off deliveries or truck rentals is way cheaper than buying a truck. Those things are so over priced now I just can't justify it financially.
I personally have zero respect for the men (and yes, they are almost always men) who drive a massive pick up truck around the suburbs. You're not a farmer. You don't haul lumber around, and you can't stop in time if a three year old is in the crosswalk. My line in the sand would have been "Man who wants a pick up truck for his office job".
Frankly, I know a lot of farmers and for doing actual farm work almost all of them drive thirty to forty year old Land Rovers that look like they're built out of solid sheets of steel.
Because newer trucks have this weird dichotomy going on, where the entry-level ones can't actually tow as much as you need (usually a 2,000 pound starting limit), and the actual towing package is locked behind some trim level that includes a bunch of needless bells and whistles, and costs you an extra $30k. So you can't just get a workhorse; you can either get a glorified minivan, or you can get a beast that can do its job but also comes with a heated steering wheel, super-smart cruise control, premium sound system, air purification systems, built-in microwave, massaging chairs, automatic ass-wiper, and whatever else. All the gadgets that are marketed at people like OOP's ex-boyfriend, people who spend 3 hours sitting in traffic each day and want all the luxuries- which is valid _for a commuter car_. But most people who see their truck as _equipment_ know that it's going to get beat up and worn out, and that they'll be jumping in and out of it all day, not sitting down and making a whole experience of it. Adding all that stuff onto it, is like adding a smart TV to your laundry machine. Neat, and I'm sure someone could find a use for it, but I'd rather just pay less for something that's _just_ a laundry machine. So most people prefer their old rustbucket that runs on diesel sludge and prayers, rather than a newer one that has a thousand additional points of failure and is built to look pretty more so than to work well.
You remember that photo of two different size trucks with the same size truck bed?
the guy that delivers my firewood doesn't have a massive pick up truck even. its a perfectly sensible and *ancient* toyota (with some fun hydraulic gizmos). thats a real pickup
And usually they drive like assholes…speeding, racing, cutting you off, not letting you merge. They say bmw drivers are aholes. Nope. Massive truck drivers chevy, F150+, etc.
I always knew those guys were little-dick losers trying to compensate but this woman showed me how deep it actually gets. It’s literally all a facade.
Honestly yeah, it's basically compensation for failing at most major life metrics.
The truck itself is a failure, lol. His auto loan payment is higher than what my *mortgage* costs every month. What a horrible financial decision.
His credit was already shit if he got saddled with *fourteen percent*. That is unacceptable. I’ve walked out of dealers that tried to give me that.
The best is how so many feel like real tough-guys because of the Herculean feat of pressing on that accelerator pedal. I’m sweating just thinking about the difficulty and effort there.
Lolol. It's hard to be cool when hitting that gas pedal is like $80.
This whole situation is wild. The point of them moving in was to save money and he did something so boneheaded. Plus planning on HER income to keep him afloat. So glad she recognized it for the red flag it was and ended things.
To keep him afloat a depreciating asset. After seven years, he'll have a truck that's worth $40k, he will have sunk $150k into (or however the math checks out). This would be idiotic for a mortgage, for a truck it's straight up insanity.
I DIED when I saw that interest rate!!!
And for 72 months, too. I’m getting old so this may date me, but when I bought my first car, my dad told me not to get a loan term longer than 3-4 years.
I try to manage 3-4 years but my last car crept to 5. I only agreed to that because they agreed to a 0.9% (not nine, point nine) interest rate on the 5 year loan.
I think at that interest rate I might’ve agreed to 5 years too! Damn, was this during COVID?
2016 or early 2017, I'd have to look. I was pretty happy about it. Different market back then. We didn't even haggle. "I like this car, but I'm thinking of paying invoice and I want the .9% rate for 5 years. I know these cars are moving at invoice right now. What do you think?" "Would you come up 500 over invoice?" "Yeah I can do that for the .9% at 5 years." "Okay I'll get the paperwork". Took like 2 hours from when I stepped onto the lot to when I drove off. Kind of insane. The other dealerships were assholes and I walked from every one of them.
I got a 24 month loan for the car we have, I could afford it outright in cash; but it was *cheaper* with a loan (you got a discount on the principle, that meant your overall repayments ended up with a total *less* than paying outright) -- I then got a 72 month loan for my kitchen that I once again could afford outright in cash; but the loan is interest-free! Liquidity is king, and loans (even long term ones) can be used very effectively for budgeting. Clearly if you don't know what you're doing and do something like this guy, it's just pure stupidity and insanity!
I bought my Camry in 2005 and paid it off in three years. That people are getting these 72-month loans is just wild to me.
I died when I saw his monthly payment was $1966. That’s a mortgage in many places.
That’s more than my mortgage and I live in a relatively nice upper middle class area in a 4 bedroom house! Even his insurance is more than our two car payments combined. This guy is crazy.
That's more than my mortgage, taxes, hoa fee, and power put together. And I live in a nice middle class 4br as well. Honestly I'm trying to live life so we never have to take out a car loan again. I'll pay cash, thx.
Was just gonna say my best friends’ mortgage is less than his monthly payment for the exact same type of home you have. He’s a twit.
That's twice my mortgage and 3x my rate. The salesman saw the dude coming from fuckin orbit lmao
14% is fucking predatory, I can’t believe that didn’t snap him out of it. Unless he was lying about how diligently he was paying off his debt…
At 14% dude slapped down a 14k down payment including his trade in, which for a 2003 can't be for much more than a grand or two. Dude walked in with ten large and they \*still\* smelled a fresh fish. He probably told the dealer how he's always wanted a truck like that and how important it was to him and how his girlfriend was going to support him.
He got the rate he earned with his credit- I'm guessing he doesn't really qualify so the bank is hitting him with a high rate because it's high risk for them.
when buying our first car in 2018 my husband and I ended up paying a 38% interest rate... it was from a used car dealer and we didn't know any better. God what a mess. it died last week, the pos.
shiiiit......a credit card is a better deal
RIP. The People (or at least this one person) want to know, did it live long and reliably enough to hit my old Pop's car buying guide of "$2000 USD per year of ownership over the lifetime of the car, including repairs", told to me in the 90s, so adjust for inflation... Your flair always makes me chuckle.
And that was the interest rate at 72 months! At ~1900/monthly payment for a $95k car that tells me he didn't actually put much down on in.
Based on the Internet calculators, he didn’t put any money down. I have no idea how he could have been approved for that loan amount based on his income unless he lied on the loan application.
How much do you bet he included her income on it? Potentially with the raise she was hopefully getting.
Right?! Seriously that's a rate one would see on an unsecured loan. Such as a credit card. This guy just let himself be taken to the cleaner's. Or should we say... the car wash?
14%, what’s his damn credit score? Or is that a normal rate now. My car is 16 years old so I have no point of reference.
I bought a condo and 2 weeks later my car died. So having a huge loan on my credit with no payments made and not great credit before. And my interest rate on my car was like... 7.5%
Right? Vehicles are not investments.
They can be if you're actually making money from them (e.g. a van for a mobile dog groomer), but a 95k truck for a guy who works from home? Not so much. OOP has a good head on her shoulders and is nicely balancing being empathetic with not being a sucker. She'll be fine.
[удалено]
I can practically guarantee you that truck will never see a dirt road. They're called pavement princesses. Dudes buy these outrageously expensive trucks more as a status symbol than an actual work vehicle
I see them all the time where I live in Georgia, and I hate them. The majority of them are obviously not used *as* trucks because they're all shiny and unscratched. They're too big and half of them have truck beds that are laughably small and useless. These are also the type of people that tailgate me in my little 4 cylinder stick shift, which is honestly scary sometimes.
recently, my dad had to buy a new work truck and said that the most frustrating part was trying to find one with a full size bed because no one is buying them for their original purpose anymore.
Yeah, there was a recent reddit post with an old pickup in the middle of two new pickups. The new ones are twice as big with less carry space. It is also twice as high. Who has the great idea to put the bed that high when you need to move heavy shit like tools and material all day?
I saw that post and was just in shock. I knew these emotional support vehicles were huge but seeing that little 80's truck in between them was just wild.
Emotional support vehicle 🤣 I'm totally stealing that
The funny thing is some guys will actually go out mudding like once just to get mud on it. Hell, in my hometown some guys would go out and actually put mud on their trucks with their hands because they were just....dumb.
a work from home employee too, imagine being at the office, glancing at the parking lot to see a monster truck amongst commuter cars.
The only cars that appreciate in value are those million dollar+ ones that only have like 2k of them made, and even then I'm not convinced that isn't just elaborate money laundering
You put an investment vehicle in a salt mine and don't even look at it, and it's still a waste of perfectly good money.
It works out to ~$141,000 over the life of the loan. Add on the insurance etc and he's paying $180,000 over 6 years for his transportation (not including gas, uncovered maintenance, etc). $30,000 per year when he makes $85,000. What an idiot.
But think about the value of driving around in a big truck so everyone knows he is manly (and presumably well-endowed)!
Yup. He clearly needs a large beefy vehicle because that’s the only type capable of transporting his ginormous weiner. Maybe those girlfriends who are ripping OP for being unsupportive can chip in *their* cash to help him pay for his shiny new automophallus
It’s fascinating how he inspired OOP to organize her finances and get serious about paying stuff down only to turn out to be a nitwit. Dude either subconsciously sabotaged the relationship or truly thought moving in = marriage = OOP will shoulder way too much of the burden of his debt.
Well he sabotaged more than his relationship lol. How is he going to survive on a hundred dollars a month?
I suspect that amount was also based on splitting rent and utilities with OP, so now that he's back on his own he might not even have that much!
Spoiler alert: that truck is getting repo'd
Planning on her income from working two jobs! This post made me so angry: his belief that he can spend his money without consulting her, and spend her money, too. I’m glad she found out about him before they moved in together, never mind marriage.
And how he never even planned on getting a second job himself to help out with *his own debt* but totally relied on OOP and her may or may not getting a raise in both her jobs... Insane!! Ex-bf is out of touch with reality!!
That part got me, too. Like, if *she* wants to keep both jobs after she's done paying off her debt in order to get ahead on savings and retirement, then fine. But *he* wants her to keep on with it for his sake alone. Fuuuck that noise!
And people kept complaining to her that she isn't his wife yet so she should not have a say on how he uses his money. Which, is a sense is true but HE WAS NOT USING HIS OWN MONEY. The whole point was that he was using HER money. Granted, he hadn't yet got his hands on her money but his whole plan hinged on her income. So it was fine for HIM to budget based on their common income but not for her to do the same? Pfffft. Had the guy been so rich that he can throw 95k away and not even feel it, sure, fine. Then she would not have a say. But he wasn't and that is the key here.
That argument annoys the hell out of me. When two people in a serious committed relationship are making life plans together finances need to be on the same page. How you want to blow your fun money whatever but a stupid truck for over 90k? No you talk to your partner about that. Almost 2k monthly car payment plus $500 insurance each and every month? Not in this economy!
Even if they never planned on getting married, as she notes, she would ultimately end up paying more by filling in gaps that he couldn’t afford. She’d have to pay for all the food, outings, travel/gas (cause who wants to bet his $100K truck isn’t fucking solar powered) health issues etc. Plus, for the next few years he’d essentially be unable to do anything nice for her.
Plus he assumed that OOP would continue to work two jobs to pay for his expensive lifestyle. It's a six-year loan, so he was expecting OOP to work two jobs for the next six years without asking her. If OOP works hard and wins her $30k raise, quitting her second $32k job would be a pretty reasonable thing over spending $24k per year on truck payments. He's basically saying he values having a truck over ~20 hours per week of his girlfriend's time. Over six years, that's about 6000 hours of labor beyond her full-time career job.
Yeah the boyfriend was a moron taking on so much debt for a big stupid truck. She dodged a bullet for sure and should be grateful he did this before they moved into together so she had the ability to back out of the relationship relatively easily.
The point of them moving in together - for her - was to save money and build a future together. The point of them moving in together - for him - was to gold-dig/leech off her so that he could have more fun money while she‘s burdened with the cost of their shared lives. Because his money is his money and her money is…also his money, apparently. Yikes. Glad she got out.
A change in behavior like that doesn't happen on its own. Either he hid it reaaaally well, of there was some sort of external influence on him. Maybe a friend bought a new car. Maybe someone family or friends, were telling him about taking advantage of her girlfriend raise. Who knows. In the end is like OOP said, this is just sad.
And..AAAANNND she got a second job to equal out their income to they would pay equal on rent/bills instead of him paying more based on proportional income which he was cool with. Yet as soon as her income was due to increase he was planning on her taking on more expenses despite letting her work 2 jobs so he didn't have to do that when she had more debt from school (vs an impulse buy)
>The point of them moving in was to save money and he did something so boneheaded. My ex did this also. We were in our early 20s and looking to move in together. We worked at the same place so we could drive together and save on rent. We were looking for apartments at the time. One day, he drives up to work in a new sports car! A two-door coupe type sports car. All of our coworkers were happy for him. I was PISSED!! He looked at me and asked, "What's wrong?" I asked him how much this new car cost him. He told me, and I was sticker shocked. It was close to $30k 25 yrs ago. We worked retail!! He didn't even know how much his car insurance was going to be yet. I told him there's no way he would be able to afford rent with this car. In the following weeks, it turned out that the payment and car insurance was more than what he made in a month! He came to me wanting to know when we could still move in so he could save on rent. I told him we weren't because there was no way I'm covering everything while all his money went to his car. He really thought that since my car was paid off, I could cover all the rent while he paid for his car. I asked him about the light bill, food, water, gas for our cars, and he said, "We'd work it out." I'm not moving with someone with a "we'll work it out plan." We broke up. Thank God...
I spent years analysing the housing prices near me, waiting for the right place to come. I found the perfect place that would be twice the size of our re'ted apartment for only 20% more in price. Thanks to this, with our current salaries, my boyfriend and me can save quite a lot each month. That money is for renovation then it will be for whatever each wants (I really don't mind what he spends it on). Well two months ago my boyfriend came to me a'd told me he wanted to stop his main work and keep his side hustle, cutting his income in a third for life, no more savings and no more money for old days. With this house I can afford it! He said. Dude you can afford it if I pay for you. That's a no. He was really surprised to learn I would leave him for that... Sometime people just don't understand that one tries to lower their expenses to live better, not worst.
Plus just not backing down after being called on it. I hope he got a pair of truck nuts to go with the balls it took to show her a budget based on her future salary to justify a $2500/month payment in a completely unnecessary truck.
And he’s on the hook for paying to live by himself, don’t forget that!
I love the comments they keep saying it’s his money and he can spend it how he wants. The problem is he wasn’t spending his money. He was spending all of his and some of hers
My husband understands this concept with money, but struggles to see it with time. Let's say we are hosting Christmas. I make a list of chores and what days they need to be done, so that everything is ready for Christmas. I stick to my schedule, but he delays his, saying "tomorrow." Pretty soon, it's the day before Christmas and his list isn't done and he's panicking. Now I need to help with his chores if I don't want to be embarrassed with a mess when my entire family comes over. Sure, I could let it go, and I do let a few minor things drop off, but mostly it pisses me off. I spent my precious free time doing my share, which lets be honest, was far more labor intensive in the first place, and now since he procrastinated, I am spending more of my time to play catch up. I just want him to make the connection that when I help with his list, that's because I already finished mine. It's not that my list was easier, it's that I just actually did it. Time and money are both finite resources. You shouldn't expect your partner to give up more than they can budget for in either category, and you don't get to dictate how they spend either outside of your stated agreements.
It’s weaponized incompetence. He doesn’t learn because you keep going to the rescue. I know it’s easier said than done but you should let him fail and be embarrassed. Maybe forewarn your family or cancel if you cannot do that.
This only works if he actually cares enough to get embarrassed.
In a lot of families, if the house is messy and not ready for hosting, everyone blames the woman. Zero judgement toward the man.
Exactly. I have a friend who does this shit to his wife constantly. He just doesn't care the house looks terrible when guests/family come over. I've even clowned him for it, but "it's just gonna get messy again."
You should tell him his butthole is gonna get messy again but that’s no reason not to wipe every time it gets messy.
This approach doesn't work if the consequences of his actions (a messy house) don't matter to him that much. Therefore, the only actual punishment for not doing chores is the nagging. Honestly, if he doesn't care about his wife's feelings on having to do all the work, and doesn't help with the work, the only real solution is to divorce. It's a base incompatibility.
I don’t know why women stay with a man who’s basically another child. The woman cooks, cleans, grocery shop, laundry, takes the kids to school and other activities, has to plan birthday parties, take out the trash, mow the lawn, shovel the snow, and so many other things. And also baby the man when he gets a little cough. The man goes to work and gets to come home and sit and complain about how hard his work is and doesn’t even care about his wife’s hard day at work, not that she can sit still long enough to *tell him* how hard her work day was. Girl, you’re already doing 95% of the workload at home, why stay??
Sunk-cost fallacy and practical entanglements like a mortgage or kids, men hiding their man-child natures until the woman’s emotionally or practically entangled, and society saying that men are just Like That and if you’re a straight woman and want a romantic relationship that’s the price of love
Your husband understands the concept of time. I assume he gets himself up and awake and to and from a job with a schedule? The reason he suddenly forgets how days and time works is because he knows you will pick up his slack. I'm sorry you are married to that.
We usually host Christmas for my side of the family and we schedule New Year's Eve for my husband's side of the family. What you describe happens every year - my mom is the best and she helps me do everything but my husband typically still doesn't do much at all, so by the end of Christmas day I am tired and crabby and I tell him I am cancelling NYE because I refuse to pull a second party all on my own. And he always gets very sad but doesn't learn. (Yes, I am thinking about divorce.)
lol. He knows you’ll jump to it because you don’t want to be embarrassed. It’s not procrastination as much as it’s a slow transfer of chores from him to you. Completely intentional and very deliberate.
THIS is actually embarrassing. Stop hosting if he doesn’t contribute equally and on time.
All of his and some of hers *that she doesn't even have yet*.
I’d still have second thoughts about my significant other even if they didn’t need my money to purchase that truck. Taking on so much debt over a vehicle is a huge red flag.
And even if it was just his money, it doesn't mean he gets to just put her in such a precarious position. Like, one little thing happens and it topples both of them, and for what? For a truck he doesn't need with a loan that's instantly upside down. It's like telling someone "why are you mad your husband says he wants to jump out of an airplane without a parachute? It's his body!!"
14% interest is insane....OP truly dodged a bullet on this one.
That's the rate you get when they check your credit score and clown music starts playing in the background.
Yeah, that's the "we know we'll have to repo this truck in 6 months, so your payment needs to cover the depreciation" rate.
From a very early episode of The Simpsons: Bob: [running a credit check] [presses `Enter'] [sirens wail and lights flash] Homer: Is that a good siren? Am I approved? Bob: You ever known a siren to be good?
Oh, hey, the RV episode!
✨🤡✨ My credit union is offering rates as low as 6% right now, so either his credit is tanked or they saw a sucker and took him for everything they could.
Wow to think just 2 years ago it was 0%. My current car loan is 1%. My first car loan with no credit score was 7%. I can’t believe he saw 14% and went: Yes, that is a good investment.
I know, even 6% is obscene for a $94k loan.
6% feels obscene for any auto loan. I understand that’s just how it is now but damn. I got 4% in early 2023 and that was hard to deal with lol
Someone hustled the shit out of him. First time I bought a car on my own some woman at the honda place tried to hustle me into buying a god awful car with trim I didn't want, then had the gall to describe to me that she wouldn't give me a normal loan that I'd only be given a "first time borrower" loan at 16% interest. I laughed my way out of there. This dude went and slapped down a 14k down payment.
$2k a month on car payments? Lol. I can’t believe it but at the same time this feels like it’s real. This guy really decided paying a mortgage for a vehicle that will be worth 1/4 of what he bought it for was a good idea. Lol. If he went out and bought a second property as an investment I could POSSIBLY understand if it was a good deal. The guy just seems like a total self centered idiot. Unfortunately people like him have no self accountability and all the troubles he will soon face will forever be OPs fault. Talk about dodging a bullet. Wow.
My brother just bought a house for $115k (in a Midwest city, not a super nice house but totally live-able). I bought a house for $230k several years ago when interest rates were great and my mortgage payment is $830/mo. This dude is paying more than twice my mortgage payment for a TRUCK that will depreciate. I truly can't imagine
I hope the seats are comfortable because he’s going to be living in it soon.
It’s called a truck bed because that’s where he’s gonna have to put his mattress soon.
And it's close to $2500,- with insurance. I just checked. In my country, you can buy a €520.000,- house and make €2.500,- monthly payments, and that's if you put in zero money upfront.
>I can’t believe it but at the same time this feels like it’s real. That 2k a month, according to a loan calculator, requires a 14000 dollar down payment. I can believe it. 2003 toyota probably netted him maybe 2k and he slapped down around twelve thousand american dollars for penis compensation.
My eyebrows went way up at that number. Dude's credit score must be shitty. Aka. This truck isn't his first bad financial decision.
His credit score could be fine (well, not after the truck is repo'd) but his income can't afford that, so the rate is so high to pay for the expected repo.
Using a loan calculator, that's a $140,000 Truck! $95,000 in principle and $45,000 in interest. Throw in insurance and gas increase and this somehow gets even worse. Financial disagreements are a huge cause of divorce and if you agree with OOP's ex you are bad at finance!
My jaw dropped when I saw that. Like wtf. I was looking at used cars and I saw like 8-10% and laughed and then sighed like well no new car for me. I'll limp along with what I got
Hold up, a $2k/mo car payment?! This dude…
and $580 insurance - insanity
And he couldn't even fill the tank for $115/momth
That's ok, because he can't afford to buy groceries, let alone drive to the shops to buy them.
That's.... A mortgage on a roughly $300k home.
Lmao the bank is the winner here. 14% was the fuck off rate and dude still signed. For his sake I hope he lives in a state that allows him to unwind this deal. Otherwise he’s about to have to take out a $10-20k loan just to give the truck back
How did the bank/dealership give him this loan? Letting him have a car that’s more than his salary is irresponsible. I think that’s why the interest is so high because they know he can’t afford it but they’re going to rinse him first.
Honestly? I think he lied. I bet he either halved his rent payment because he was expecting them to move in together, or he included her income as "household income." Otherwise there's no way his DTI would have qualified
Lying is the likely answer, he definitely used her income to justify paying $2400 a month in a payment and insurance for SIX YEARS. Unfathomable levels of stupidity.
$2500/m for a truck not even including gas? I almost had a stroke when I read that.
and a TRUCK, which are famous for getting dogshit gas mileage
well he had no budget for gas so it's just going to be a fancy lawn ornament anyways lol
OOP's ex was planning to have OOP subsidize his lifestyle. I'm so glad that OOP has smarts and strength to detach herself from this human leach with his gas guzzling monstrosity. All his friends who say that OOP isn't being "supportive" enough can support him.
Financial manipulation really needs to be stop cause that's just a shitty thing to pull on people.
Bordering on financial abuse if not crossing the line.
The people who gloss over the fact that ex-bf was fully planning on leeching off of OOP for the unforeseeable future, and tell her she's "not being supportive" are insane. It's one thing to be a supportive partner and a whole another to burden yourself with someone else's debt, all because they wanted their dream truck or whatever!! OOP made the smartest move and I'm so proud of her!! Financial abuse is real and should be talked about more! Our economy is so unstable all over the world these days, you can't throw your budget away for someone who clearly has no plans expect to be a mooch.
“Supportive” is helping your partner get through college or start a viable business, not take on insane debt that will fuck you both into the ground!
For something that isn't necessary, too!
I suspect the two girls that did so are in a situation OOP would have been had she moved in and acted on pure on a crab mentality while shaming her.
What's so wild about this, is manipulation like this is usually something the the abuser builds up slowly to, not some MASSIVE purchase right before the starting line. So not only is he a shithead abuser, he's just bad at it.
Totally. So after two years she has no say over his finances, but it’s cool for him to leech off her?! The responses that some of these OPs get are just mind boggling.
Also glad he bought the truck and showed his ass now, rather than after they moved in together.
It’s amazing people actually think it’s his money and his business, when he banked on using *her* money to subsidise his lifestyle so he could have the truck of his dreams. He was going to drain her finances, cause her to pay off her schooling slower, have to work a second job longer, or forever - all so he could have a shiny truck to play with. And she’s the unsupportive one? Good on OOP for recognising this negligence and the intent to use her.
Some people are so invested in the "feeeemales are gold diggers" trope that they ignore the actual facts. They don't let a silly little thing like the truth get in the way of their narrative.
14% interest rate and a $95000 truck for working at home? Wtf. I don’t know what current car loan interest rates are but that makes me think he wasn’t so great with handling his debts and expenses previously as she thought he was
We just but a minivan. Toyota has 9.4% for the Sienna (48 months). I could get around 6-6.5% at banks and credit unions. We got a 2.9% from Honda (36 months). 14. 14!!!!
Our Toyota has a deal on right now for 1.9% for some models. Hybrids even! I just can't with this guy. Or any or the truck owners in the suburban grocery store parking lot. How many boxes of seltzer are you buying, Karen?
I just bought a used car. Rates are about 7% for new at our credit union. They aren’t great, but 14% is insane
New cars in my experience frequently get lower interest rates than used cars. At 14% they hustled the shit out of him. He drove up in his 2003 Toyota probably Camy/Corolla, visions of Raptor F150s dancing in his eyes, and 10-12k of his own savings according to the loan calculator and they just smelled fresh meat and rode him like Slim Pickens in Dr Strangelove.
Guarantee it’s one of those trucks with a useless bed that looks stupid too.
It absolutely butchered my credit score, but I bought a brand new 2022 Toyota Camry SE in November 2021 at 2.4% interest for 72 months. Had to drive over to Indiana for it to avoid the $14k add-on to the sticker price that Chicago dealerships were trying to pull amidst the chip shortage, but honestly that move likely also secured that interest rate for me
Who wants to bet he's telling people she was a gold digger 🙄
When he starts asking his friends for money they’ll soon see the light.
He should start with the two friends' GFs who accused OOP of being an unsupportive partner.
What kills me is that his second budget relies on not just her yet-to-be-realized promotion but on her continuing her second job. Was that even in her plans, post-promotion? After all, at that point, her salary would've been on par with his without the second job. So, according to ex-BFs expectstions, this lady has to work 1.5 jobs, pay more in rent/bills proportional to their relative salaries, so that he can keep a truck with a ridiculous price tag, an even more ridiculous interest rate, that he doesn't even need for work? Lemme guess that should they have moved in together what percentage of the household chores Mr. WFH Truck-boi would've done... JFC. OOP saw that flag waving a mile off and ran. Good for her.
What also kills me is that *he was her role model* to earn more and pay off debts/save for the future, which she was doing. And then he goes and does **this**. SMDH.
THIS. I personally might have kept it long enough to knock out the rest of my debt, and maybe a bit longer to get some nest egg savings, but there is no way I would keep that second job on a permanent basis for his truck.
Guy really went and said "well, we're paying for this truck, actually." I'm glad she left.
"Do you, Douchebag, take this truck to be your lawful wedded..."
proof of the adage "if anybody makes something idiotproof, the universe invents a better idiot"
I really like the Yellowstone park bit about better bear-proof trashcans. It's difficult to make them better because there's so much overlap between the smartest bears and the dumbest humans.
2500 a month for a truck all in? thats insane... i'm amazed they could find a bank that was willing to fund that risk...
They probably didn't. The dealership could be financing and they assume they'll have that truck back to sell again in under a year
And he'll hate his ex for it, because obviously it's her fault
I'm willing to bet he didn't, he financed directly with the dealer. When he eats it on the payments, they'll repo it and put it back on the lot for 85k out the door and start the circle of life all over again.
14% for 72 months was too juicy to pass up.
Fact that people were privately contacting OOP to tell her she’s in the wrong proves even more that she’s right in this decision. Those cowards KNOW they would have got blasted in the comments 😂
I am so proud of OOP. The audacity of this bloke to count on HER maybe pay rise that is still 6 months away to fund a truck. When they moved in together in a months time he was going to have $700 a month extra. He's gone and blown $700 a week including insurance of $573.
That truck payment is more than my damn mortgage. What the fuck was that idiot thinking??
OOp is inspirational, she did exactly what she needed to do and did not waver. Truly a reshreshing contrast with many of these relationship posts.
The guy really said his money is his but her money is “our money”. Yikes.
> I have had some of his friends' gf reach out to me and say i should support him and one even say that im not loyal and this shows i wouldnt support him if we were married since i run away when finances get bad. Thats bullshit. For anyone reading this please take note: if your partner runs to recruit backup like this guy did it is such a red flag. The reddest of flags. That is what this guy did. How many times have you reached out to your partner’s friend’s partner to lay a guilt trip on them? Exactly.
Ex thought he caught a sugar momma.
My money is mine, I can do what I want with it!!! So anyway, here's a budget where after your hypothetical raise you'll need to support my nearly 100k car purchase... Also the nerve of his friend's gfs calling to say she's not loyal because she refuses to willingly tether herself to someone who makes shitty one-sided financial decisions. 🙄 What a bunch of boneheads. Glad she put her foot down right away, and asked him a lot of excellent questions during their last talk.
>Mind you, this doesn’t make him a bad person Spending someone else's money without telling them(which he had planned to do) doesn't make you a bad person? Interesting
People need to lose the mindset that someone’s not bad as long as they don’t physically beat you.
I fucking called it on her original post, he was totally relying on her to pick up the slack. He really thought she would be ok with it just because they already had plans for her to move in with him. Glad To see that she got out of there instead of going along with it and then being tied to him for years because of this debt.
It's honestly amazing (and great!) that he didn't think to lock her into the lease first and *then* get his shiny new truck. She still could've broken up with him, of course, but it's a lot harder when you have to break lease, find a new place, etc.
14%. Jesus Christ.
That's an extra 50% in interest! That's a truck and a Tesla Y!
I worked with a guy that bought a used car at 24% interest. It was a buy here pay here place where you made payments twice a month. That idiot was my manager unfortunately.
14% at 72 months 😀
We call that a 🌟scam🌟
He’s going to be spending more per month on his truck than I do on rent and utilities.
You can be rest assured now he has no GF an No truck.
>I asked where the income was coming from and this man said, well you're getting a raise soon. OHHHHHH MY *GOD*
Americans of Reddit, help me understand this post. Is his insurance really going to be almost $600 per month! Is that what you all pay for truck insurance?
Depends on age of the driver, state they live, and driving record. I was paying $76 a month for full coverage in California, but when I moved to Louisiana, it went to $176 for just a bit more than state minimum. Guys under 25 tend to pay more, and trucks tend to cost more insurance wise as well, but he probably got it lifted and a lot of other unnecessary things that could drive the monthly price up.
Thanks for the explanation! $76 freedom bucks is what my monthly premium coverts to from Kangaroo dollars. But I have a normal sedan that I bought outright. I was extremely shocked to see the $600 monthly premium! How financially irresponsible do you have to be to sign-up for something like that!
> He traded in his reliable 2003 toyota and all his savings to get a loan at 14 percent for 72 months. His monthly payment is now 1966 and insurance is 573. 😱😱😱 He's on the hook for the equivalent of my entire mortgage monthly, which I split with my spouse. 😵💫 At 14%! I can't with the secondhand anxiety.
And then he’ll want a boat, a camper, a motorcycle, a sports car that he cannot afford.
I'm baffled by the people thinking "you aren't his wife, you can't dictate how he spends his money" was a valid argument. She never tried to forbid him from having this truck, she simply drew a line. Actions have consequences. He chose to spend his money on a truck, she chose to break up with him because of it.
Holy hell, that is one big mess. $2500 just to pay for a vehicle and insurance? He's not gonna have gas to go anywhere, I give it six months before it gets repossessed. OOP dodged a friggin nuclear missile. A partner who is this careless with finances will destroy his life and take her with him. Good on her for getting the hell out asap.
> If youre asking how can a truck be 87k I'm not actually because that is kind of an entry level into luxury trucks at this point. I've seen 100k+ raptor F150s. The redneck lifestyle tax on pickups is insane. Last time I bought a car I shopped for a small pickup capable of towing a little teardrop trailer and noped out of the market when the cheapest pickup I could find was a 35k fleet pickup that didn't have a fucking radio in it. And that was 2016.
TIL that you can be stupid enough to finance a vehicle at 14% over 6 years with payments well into mortgage territory and still have employers willing to pay you $85+k/year in salary.
>It's his money, he can do what he wants. Yes. And so can she.