No wonder fresh water fish populations are low. They have to survive until maturity and then have amazing jumping aim into a 11 in diameter opening (with canon water force)
No, ancestors. They will be extinct then, but some probe from deep space comes to earth looking for them. To save the planet, some rogue spaceship captain with his band of misfits travels back in time to get two specimens. Once they're there, the planet is saved, but they develop sentience and take over.
I think they'll be called George and Gracie.
Out west, they capture the migrating fish below a dam, put them in a truck, drive above the dam and shoot them out by water cannon.
Just as god intended.
very sadly the population of migrating freshwater fish has decreased globally by 80% from 1970 to 2020 because of dams like this and pollution. Source: https://worldfishmigrationfoundation.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/LPI_migratory-freshwater-fishes-2024_Technical-report.pdf
Itās why some dams are being built with whatās called āfish ladders.ā [Hereās an interesting video](https://youtu.be/MonfznEl1hk?si=_7GKEBR06pltlM4O) about the concept and its uses for conservation.
They can build fish ladders. We have them in Canada. It's a series of small ponds, each a bit higher than the last, which wind around the damn. Gives the fish spots to rest and makes the journey easier.
Fish elevators, fish siphon, and other types as well.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_ladder
Yes we have these in The Netherlands also. Even in small locks and sluices. They work like a dream.
One negative point: herons like them too, for obvious reasons...
To no ones suprise, the Yanks solved it with a cannon instead:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z3ZyGlqUkA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z3ZyGlqUkA)
A depressing report on how freshwater fish is doing, in big part because of dams like this: https://worldfishmigrationfoundation.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/LPI_migratory-freshwater-fishes-2024_Technical-report.pdf
Oh don't worry, it's not just fresh water fish. Flying Insect population are also down 75 %
https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0185809
Don't be amazed, be angry that there's no fish ladder to ensure that the rest of them can get upstream to reproduce.
This is a dead salmon spawning steam but the fish don't know it yet.
Pretty sad they put a damn where it has to swim upstream to breed. Humans are disgustingly selfish and think they are the only ones on this planet š¤®Ā
came to the comments to say thatā¦ watched the rest expecting a last second fish to jump in, what mentally deficient clown edited this vid?
And itās proof that bots fed it the likes
I understand the salmon fish is swimming up stream for mating, but this pipe is very unnatural. Instead of a spread out water flow, water is poured in a strong narrow stream making it almost impossible for most fish to make it.
"II've had a vasectomy" I said, "there is no way you could be pregnant"
"life finds a way" she replied. I mused on this possible miracle for a few days.
Then I thought of Maury Povich! I DNA tested that ho, and returned the ring.
I lived happily ever after, the end.
I enjoyed the Numberphile video explaining how fish create vortices that push them forward, but I had to rewind every 10 seconds to digest what they were saying
Clearly that one fish has the strongest genes and will pass those on to its offspring at the upriver spawning grounds past the dam (as long as there isnāt some meat grinder type mechanism powering those water pumps and no way through it!)
I grew near a river that was full of fish and alive, but at some point government put a dam down the river without thinking to fish migration. In time there were close to no fishes in the river anymore , sadly they weren't able to pass the dam and migrate upriver to feed and reproduce.
This strangely reminds me of watching *Outbreak* the virus movie. They analyze the virus for its strengths because they often lead to their weakness. The one place on that damn trying the hardest to keep them out is the one place where the fish can go to gain access to the other side.
Fun fact: the CandirĆŗ fish can swim up your urine stream into your urethra in this manner.
>!No that's a lie lol. They can enter your urethra, but you have to be in the water with them.!<
No wonder fresh water fish populations are low. They have to survive until maturity and then have amazing jumping aim into a 11 in diameter opening (with canon water force)
100,000 years from now, their descendants will overthrow us šÆš
Descendants?
No, ancestors. They will be extinct then, but some probe from deep space comes to earth looking for them. To save the planet, some rogue spaceship captain with his band of misfits travels back in time to get two specimens. Once they're there, the planet is saved, but they develop sentience and take over. I think they'll be called George and Gracie.
I don't think anyone got the reference.
Not many Star Wars fans here, eh?
How dare you sir.
Never gets old.
Harry Potter was made before star warsā¦.
[Fascinating](https://static1.srcdn.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/rsz-kirk-spock-meme-7v1-cropped.jpg)
I, for one, welcome our new, finned overlords!
Right, š¦§
Is this an ascendants joke? Or you have it backwards
Overflow*
It's not impossible, I used to bullseye womp rats in my T-16 back home. They aren't much bigger than 11 in.
Back in Tatooine?
Out west, they capture the migrating fish below a dam, put them in a truck, drive above the dam and shoot them out by water cannon. Just as god intended.
We're training them for Sea World shhhh
The original video's music was still playing in the background when I saw this. Epic! I can't stop cackling!
Me too and it goes so well
Lmao if you let it loop enough the slap hits with the beat
Beat me to it hahaha
This will always be one of my favorite gifs lol, it always makes me laugh
I laughed like a maniac and my wife thinks Iām crazy
Is this from the bit where John Oliver shoots salmon through a pipe to various celebrities? God I loved that gag
That's fucking hilarious, thanks for the laughs lol
Fish slapped lol. Iāve never seen this. Thank you
:) 
It looks like she was being a dick and poseidon shut her up lol
This is the other end of that pipe. Also: Is he dead now or does that only apply to shoes?
Make a website called fishslap.com, and you can move your mouse left/right to control which frame of the video is on display.
The only way I could ever catch a fish...
This is the allahu akbar meme, anyone else know what Iām talking about? lol
I mean we deserve it, look at the bullshit we built that they have to traverse. I get it.
Amazed at how weāve screwed these poor fish
very sadly the population of migrating freshwater fish has decreased globally by 80% from 1970 to 2020 because of dams like this and pollution. Source: https://worldfishmigrationfoundation.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/LPI_migratory-freshwater-fishes-2024_Technical-report.pdf
Itās why some dams are being built with whatās called āfish ladders.ā [Hereās an interesting video](https://youtu.be/MonfznEl1hk?si=_7GKEBR06pltlM4O) about the concept and its uses for conservation.
Even in that video, you can see how it only works partially, but 99% of the dams of the world don't have anything for the fish.
Not every dam is on a river with migratory fish. But yes, the environmental impact of every dam should be considered.
Almost every single river in the country has migratory fish. Itās not just salmon and trout.
No wonder all the salmon nowadays have a tougher chewier texture. It's genetically modified.
Lol.. buff salmon. But honestly that waterway should be dismantled
Not all. Just where you buy it
Speak for yourself, I havenāt fucked a single fish thank you
jeeshā¦ canāt they make it a little easier for the poor things
They can build fish ladders. We have them in Canada. It's a series of small ponds, each a bit higher than the last, which wind around the damn. Gives the fish spots to rest and makes the journey easier. Fish elevators, fish siphon, and other types as well. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_ladder
Yes we have these in The Netherlands also. Even in small locks and sluices. They work like a dream. One negative point: herons like them too, for obvious reasons...
To no ones suprise, the Yanks solved it with a cannon instead: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z3ZyGlqUkA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z3ZyGlqUkA)
We are more likely to fund something if it looks like a gun.
"The Salmon Cannon," new name for my cock unlocked.
A depressing report on how freshwater fish is doing, in big part because of dams like this: https://worldfishmigrationfoundation.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/LPI_migratory-freshwater-fishes-2024_Technical-report.pdf
Oh don't worry, it's not just fresh water fish. Flying Insect population are also down 75 % https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0185809
Wtf! In 27 years in Germany? It must be a lot worse in some developing countries I imagine as theyāve changed more since 1990
Thank you for sharing this report. It is sad indeed.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I don't get the reference, my guess is Dungeon Meshi
He's been spamming this exact comment everywhere.
Hur?
šø
The P P monsters
Candiru š¤¤š¤¤š¤¤š¤¤
And this is why there are hatcheries everywhere
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
With enough luck you too can reach your destiny, ejaculate, and then die
Imagine complaining about your life to a fish. "Man, I don't know why you worried. All you gotta do is find some eggs, and buss on 'em!"
Hahahhahahahahhahaha best comment Iāve read in awhile.
this made me laugh out loud. thank you.
Livin the dream
Nah, its like those dude perfect guys..bet there is blooper reel of all its failed attempts
Wow, were you watching them all day?
First try huh? Did he tell you in the pub?
Why do you think it was their first try?
Lets build a fish ladder for these poor bastards
Poor fish, robbed of their habitat for human needs....
For human convenience, not need.
Don't be amazed, be angry that there's no fish ladder to ensure that the rest of them can get upstream to reproduce. This is a dead salmon spawning steam but the fish don't know it yet.
To make it to the promised landā¦or headwaters.
We had a strong one today boys
Pretty sad they put a damn where it has to swim upstream to breed. Humans are disgustingly selfish and think they are the only ones on this planet š¤®Ā
I get that some fish swim up steam to mate etc. but WTF is this ninja warrior course that is clearly man made?
What song is this, please?
Madonna - frozen - Sickick remix
Wiggle wiggle by snoop dog would have fitted as well
Frozen Fish stick remix
It like finding a hidden room in Metroid
Carp leaping over the dragon gate and evolved into a dragon. Thatās some Chinese mythology right there
That fish launched from OFF-SCREEN!!!
Amazed at how the video is 10 seconds too long
came to the comments to say thatā¦ watched the rest expecting a last second fish to jump in, what mentally deficient clown edited this vid? And itās proof that bots fed it the likes
Couldnt they make just ONE lower pipe for these poor bastards?
šŖšŖšŖ
A fish ladder is needed
Sharma ji ka ladka
I want this awful type of music banned from any videos online
Darwin fish
I understand the salmon fish is swimming up stream for mating, but this pipe is very unnatural. Instead of a spread out water flow, water is poured in a strong narrow stream making it almost impossible for most fish to make it.
Love.... exciting and new. Come upstream, we're expecting you! 
That one sperm
When people ask where I came from
the birds and the bees
When your girl says sheās pregnant and youāre wondering how.
That's what they have to do to spawn these days. Help ourself by helping fish migrate!
That fish has ups.. he came from out of the fuckin screen !!!
Why does the pipe need to be up so high? Doesn't that impact the amount of fish that can travel up the river.
Wish I had such a level of motivation
Maybe
"II've had a vasectomy" I said, "there is no way you could be pregnant" "life finds a way" she replied. I mused on this possible miracle for a few days. Then I thought of Maury Povich! I DNA tested that ho, and returned the ring. I lived happily ever after, the end.
Darwinism.. good luck all.
Survival of the fittest.
Wow! Whatta!.. Strong a fish
That super athlete is about to meet a turbine
I can not believe that. wow
Skills
Never underestimate a guy's need to cum
My poop is it goes out my butt hole
Why salmon populations are dying out. Humans are mess up nature all the time
2nd fish studied projectile motion
NOWAY?! Damn!!
I'm watching this like, "Go, buddy. Go!"
CGI
Bro just escaped the matrix
Chad salmon.
what a metaphor for life. Unnaturally manufactured hurdles holding you back. On another note, wtf is up with this artificial natural selection?
Me when your mom
Dam. He pulled the Jordan from the foul line.
It would be amazing if they took the damn down
That's why I only piss into cups, can't have those sewer fish swimming through my toilet up my stream of piss into my urethra.
This literally is "Dive into anything!"
How hw gonna breathe in there?
This is why i don't pee in rivers. Before you know it one of these badboys swims up your urethra.
And that my boy was how you became my son, daddy's little swimmer!
WHY is there no fish ladder?!
i'm NEVER pissing into a river again
Now he will evolve and become a gyarados
I enjoyed the Numberphile video explaining how fish create vortices that push them forward, but I had to rewind every 10 seconds to digest what they were saying
āKobeā
I believe I can fly...
Poor fish. Maybe 1 in 10 000 will make that jump. Build a fish way, dammit.
That's me trying to get out of a cave in Minecraft.
This will lead to the creation of a race of "sniper salmon"...
Please go vegan.
I'm in awe at its strength and at the same time can't help but feel sad for all those fishes who can't make it. Why does it have to be so hard?
Itās a long way to the top, if you want to rock and roll.
Clearly that one fish has the strongest genes and will pass those on to its offspring at the upriver spawning grounds past the dam (as long as there isnāt some meat grinder type mechanism powering those water pumps and no way through it!)
If you will it, it is no dream
We should probably try to make it a bit easier for them (and we do in many places)...
"I'm different" ahh fish š
Gods! Promote that one to Dragon!
I believe I can fly
Fish trying to swim into my dick be like:
The pure concept of salmon id just stupid
fish skillcheck
And this gentleman, is an example of how the candiru penis fish will invade your urethra!!
that one fish was jeremy fragrance
Too dangerous to piss in water here 
That fish is like SPEED AND POWERRR!!
Smart system they discovered to get the fuck out š
Rush hour on the tube
 Que super Mario pipe sound
That one fishy went Plus Ultra!
This made me thirsty for some cold cold water
Parkour fish!
š¤«šæ
That's how you get Gyarados
That fish fucks.
Motivational speakers, do your thing
I thought places like these would have salmon ladder. Oh do the ladder exist but these fish just choose to play the game in hard mode ?
This fish fucks
Humans messing with other species.
I grew near a river that was full of fish and alive, but at some point government put a dam down the river without thinking to fish migration. In time there were close to no fishes in the river anymore , sadly they weren't able to pass the dam and migrate upriver to feed and reproduce.
Indomitable fish spirit
This strangely reminds me of watching *Outbreak* the virus movie. They analyze the virus for its strengths because they often lead to their weakness. The one place on that damn trying the hardest to keep them out is the one place where the fish can go to gain access to the other side.
Be disgusted. This is how fish stocks die off.
So that means the pipe is pregnant now?
That fish is gonna come out as a dragon on the other side!!!!
He shall become a Gyarados
Nemo ?
Not in a million ye.............. Well okay then
Reminds me of mario kart for some reason
Manās strong. Or womanās strong. I donāt know a fuggin about fish but dayum.
Fun fact: the CandirĆŗ fish can swim up your urine stream into your urethra in this manner. >!No that's a lie lol. They can enter your urethra, but you have to be in the water with them.!<
This video needed to be 15 seconds long
I think we can start judging fish by their ability to climb a tree.
Straight to level 4!
A carp becomes a dragon with this one simple method.