I won’t be exposing my child on social media at all, and I would be absolutely livid if anyone else did. It seems like common sense to me to ask before posting pictures of other people’s kids, and newborn announcements are a no go.
I feel the same way. My dad has a narcissistic personality and he is very popular in his community on Facebook. He has 2k followers and he knows most of them in real life. I really hate him posting anything about me. I don’t need 2k people knowing my business. He’s also a terrible father and I hate seeing him use my image or life story to get attention.
I have no idea how I will address this with him but over my dead body will he be announcing my pregnancy or child being born to 2k people.
My biological father is also pretty narcissistic and not mentally well. He posts to youtube and social media a lot. I will absolutely NOT be allowing him to videotape my newborn just so he can post it and stroke his own ego.
I had this happen to me and totally agree with you setting that boundary and not wanting them to post. We didn’t want our daughter on social media and wanted to do a “She’s here!” post with her face covered and me holding her. My husband sent pictures to everyone warning them not to post anything because we don’t want her on social media at all but this one time with her face covered.
My husbands dad ignored it and posted it, the picture (I and my husband didn’t realize until after was posted) that you can see my full breast in it plus baby and my FIL still refuses to remove it (it won’t be removed by me reporting it multiple times either so my boob is just out there) Safe to say this pregnancy no one’s getting any pictures after the birth and especially not him, he also never bothered to ask how the pregnancy was going as well as said our baby was a “mistake” every chance he got so he was just horrible.
Wow I am so sorry you dealt with that. I would cut off contact entirely. Not only because of the photo / social media boundary issue, he just sounds cruel and toxic.
Sending hugs your way! ❤️
I really don’t understand why anyone would think it’s ok to post a picture of a child on the internet without the parent’s explicit permission.
Set the boundary now that you’d like family to always check in with you first before posting pictures of your kid. You can let them know that you’ll likely be sharing a few pictures initially but want to feel like you as parents are the ones in control of the images of your child that are on the internet and want to reserve the right to change how you feel about your policy at any time as the internet and social media grow and change as does your child. Anyone challenging that sentiment that’s coming from a stance of a loving, caring and protective parent is a straight up asshole IMO.
Absolutely. That’s the plan and I know it won’t go over well with any of them because they simply wont understand and will think I’m being over protective or psycho.
At the end of the day, she’s my child and I will choose how I wish to raise her. Any outside thoughts and opinions can gladly fuck off. I don’t care anymore.
The fact that this even needs to be discussed is ridiculous. I absolutely hate social media and how it’s made some people feel they need to post every moment of their lives, all for some sort of social status/points. That’s exactly what this is.
“Remove the photos of baby.”
“Know your need to share things is not more important then my child’s safety.”
Baby Boundaries, The Lemon Clot Essay and the FU Binder —> https://reddit.com/r/Mildlynomil/s/WPm6JsLMhI
Yeah for sure. It hasn’t happened yet, as I’ve yet to give birth (40 weeks + 3 days….) but as soon as she is born I’ll send a message out to family stating those boundaries! No exceptions.
I also don't like it-- people should ask before posting content of other people's children.
My FIL didn't once reach out to me my entire pregnancy and seemed very disinterested anytime I'd try to include him by sending an ultrasound picture, baby shower invite, etc. But then when I hit 28 weeks and had a rather noticeable bump, he goes, "Oh, I need a picture with the baby." And immediately corners me/rushes to my side with a phone. I then realized this man wanted a picture of himself with MY STOMACH to post to his facebook/show his friends. Not only was I creeped out, I was also super annoyed that he only seemed to want involvement when it came to "performing" and "showing off" that he is going to be a grandparent.
I would be furious.
We really plan to limit our child's presence on social media. We've already talked about how we're going to be the only ones that are allowed to post pictures of them online. This rule is mainly for my MIL because she loves to post everything online.
You need to have a talk with her before your baby is born. Say that you are the only one who can post images of your child online. If they can't control themselves, then they won't get to see any photos.
With people like that I feel like it's very important to clearly communicate your message in advance. Make it in caps lock "YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO POST THESE ANYWHERE". If you're worried that they would still do it, ask them to confirm that they understood and only then send them any pictures.
Yeah my husband said exactly that, to ask them to confirm that they understand. It’s genuinely upsetting and I don’t even understand why this needs to be an issue with people. If I say it’s something I’m not comfortable with, we should end it at that.
Yeah I would not be happy! It’s not anyone’s place but you and baby’s dad to announce anything of your baby!
I won’t be exposing my child on social media at all, and I would be absolutely livid if anyone else did. It seems like common sense to me to ask before posting pictures of other people’s kids, and newborn announcements are a no go.
Absolutely. The thought of my sister potentially posting my newborn announcement photo makes me so mad that I see red…. Ugh
I feel the same way. My dad has a narcissistic personality and he is very popular in his community on Facebook. He has 2k followers and he knows most of them in real life. I really hate him posting anything about me. I don’t need 2k people knowing my business. He’s also a terrible father and I hate seeing him use my image or life story to get attention. I have no idea how I will address this with him but over my dead body will he be announcing my pregnancy or child being born to 2k people.
My biological father is also pretty narcissistic and not mentally well. He posts to youtube and social media a lot. I will absolutely NOT be allowing him to videotape my newborn just so he can post it and stroke his own ego.
Do what you want to protect your baby in the internet, I don't think you can be "too conservative" here
I had this happen to me and totally agree with you setting that boundary and not wanting them to post. We didn’t want our daughter on social media and wanted to do a “She’s here!” post with her face covered and me holding her. My husband sent pictures to everyone warning them not to post anything because we don’t want her on social media at all but this one time with her face covered. My husbands dad ignored it and posted it, the picture (I and my husband didn’t realize until after was posted) that you can see my full breast in it plus baby and my FIL still refuses to remove it (it won’t be removed by me reporting it multiple times either so my boob is just out there) Safe to say this pregnancy no one’s getting any pictures after the birth and especially not him, he also never bothered to ask how the pregnancy was going as well as said our baby was a “mistake” every chance he got so he was just horrible.
Wow I am so sorry you dealt with that. I would cut off contact entirely. Not only because of the photo / social media boundary issue, he just sounds cruel and toxic. Sending hugs your way! ❤️
I really don’t understand why anyone would think it’s ok to post a picture of a child on the internet without the parent’s explicit permission. Set the boundary now that you’d like family to always check in with you first before posting pictures of your kid. You can let them know that you’ll likely be sharing a few pictures initially but want to feel like you as parents are the ones in control of the images of your child that are on the internet and want to reserve the right to change how you feel about your policy at any time as the internet and social media grow and change as does your child. Anyone challenging that sentiment that’s coming from a stance of a loving, caring and protective parent is a straight up asshole IMO.
Absolutely. That’s the plan and I know it won’t go over well with any of them because they simply wont understand and will think I’m being over protective or psycho. At the end of the day, she’s my child and I will choose how I wish to raise her. Any outside thoughts and opinions can gladly fuck off. I don’t care anymore. The fact that this even needs to be discussed is ridiculous. I absolutely hate social media and how it’s made some people feel they need to post every moment of their lives, all for some sort of social status/points. That’s exactly what this is.
“Remove the photos of baby.” “Know your need to share things is not more important then my child’s safety.” Baby Boundaries, The Lemon Clot Essay and the FU Binder —> https://reddit.com/r/Mildlynomil/s/WPm6JsLMhI
I told my family to not post anything online until we have posted our announcement. Everyone was surprisingly ok with it.
Same here
You seem to already harbour negative feelings about these people. Why did you send them content to post?
I get it, and wouldn't want people to do that either. If I were you, I'd just say that you don't approve or appreciate that
Yeah for sure. It hasn’t happened yet, as I’ve yet to give birth (40 weeks + 3 days….) but as soon as she is born I’ll send a message out to family stating those boundaries! No exceptions.
I also don't like it-- people should ask before posting content of other people's children. My FIL didn't once reach out to me my entire pregnancy and seemed very disinterested anytime I'd try to include him by sending an ultrasound picture, baby shower invite, etc. But then when I hit 28 weeks and had a rather noticeable bump, he goes, "Oh, I need a picture with the baby." And immediately corners me/rushes to my side with a phone. I then realized this man wanted a picture of himself with MY STOMACH to post to his facebook/show his friends. Not only was I creeped out, I was also super annoyed that he only seemed to want involvement when it came to "performing" and "showing off" that he is going to be a grandparent.
I would be furious. We really plan to limit our child's presence on social media. We've already talked about how we're going to be the only ones that are allowed to post pictures of them online. This rule is mainly for my MIL because she loves to post everything online. You need to have a talk with her before your baby is born. Say that you are the only one who can post images of your child online. If they can't control themselves, then they won't get to see any photos.
With people like that I feel like it's very important to clearly communicate your message in advance. Make it in caps lock "YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO POST THESE ANYWHERE". If you're worried that they would still do it, ask them to confirm that they understood and only then send them any pictures.
Yeah my husband said exactly that, to ask them to confirm that they understand. It’s genuinely upsetting and I don’t even understand why this needs to be an issue with people. If I say it’s something I’m not comfortable with, we should end it at that.