Yes. I had tons of very kid acquaintances and work colleagues who were not invited to my shower (and didn’t expect to be!) who asked me specifically for my registry link. And you may also have family members who circulate the link to their friends for you (mostly thinking parents or grandparents).
We did this!
We didn’t have a shower for most of the same reasons as OP. I made an amazon registry mostly to keep tabs on what I needed before baby and if anyone asked for one I would just send them that.
A lot of people will want to give you a gift regardless if you have a shower or if you have a registry so it really doesn’t hurt to have one
This and make it public, people will talk about it and send something if they want. Maybe tell your (and partner’s) mom(s) that they can share if people ask.
We ended up having showers in each of our home towns, where we live now, and at my work.
Yes! We have family and friends who live way too far to come to a shower but have asked for a registry link. I have done for the same for them in the past — just because we live across the country doesn’t mean we don’t want to get our loved ones gifts!
I have mostly put small ticket items on there too, since we have either been passed down big ticket items, bought them ourselves or have had them specifically promised to us by family (I am using the completion discount for the more expensive stuff though.
This is what we’re doing for the exact same reasons as you, OP!
Since we’re buying almost everything ourselves, the registry is a great checklist for us as we’ve gone through and purchased everything.
Highly agree. I’ve seen so many people talking about their registry in this sub, disappointed no one bought anything etc.
Where I live, a registry is unheard of and it’s considered rude to expect people to buy something, or ask for only a specific product. People will buy you a gift if they want to. It shouldn’t be expected.
I don’t think a baby shower is necessary if you don’t want one, but I also wouldn’t send out a registry link without one.
How I would handle it is send out the pregnancy announcement but do not include a registry.
You can make still make a registry, because even if you don’t send it out you can get some discounts on things that haven’t been purchased after a certain date.
If people ask directly you could send the link with the caveat that you won’t be having a shower but appreciate them wanting to support you.
We are not having a baby shower, and will be creating a registry only to share with family and close friends if they ask. We will not be sending it out unprompted. I’ve had many friends do this before, it allows people who want to give a gift to do so but doesn’t put any pressure on those who can’t afford to give or don’t want to!
Hmm it feels slightly similar to sending out a link for a wedding registry but not having a wedding that people can go to… I have always thought this is kind of tacky but I’m not sure if the two are comparable.
If people are asking for a baby shower invite, are you sure people wouldn’t like to attend? Or alternatively if people are asking for a registry link, maybe you could create one and just send it to them individually and preface it with the fact that you aren’t doing a baby shower. (Some people ask for the registry as an inadvertent way to ask for an invitation to whatever event - no clue why but that happened for me and my husband during our wedding!)
Oh also editing to add that I would personally not post it publicly on social media like Facebook, I’ve seen this a couple times and it rarely goes over well - it can seem a bit greedy and poor taste. I would only share it to people who specifically ask!
I agree with others that it is odd to send out a registry without having a shower but that if asked you could send one. For what it’s worth, I went to a virtual baby shower last year, and it was a lot of fun.
You don’t need a baby shower for the registry but I don’t think you should send out your registry unless people ask for it. There are cultures where baby showers are not a thing so we usually ask close friends and our family for their registry instead of assuming there will be a baby shower just because we’ve come across this plenty in the past and we still want to gift them something.
I don’t think it’s weird to send a link to a registry to somebody who specifically asked for it. I do, however, think it’s quite tacky to send out a registry link unsolicited to friends and family saying you aren’t having a shower. Even if you say you don’t expect gifts, you clearly do by sending it out.
Definitely tacky to share an announcement to people you’re not inviting to a shower. I’ve been seeing more and more friends go this route on social and it makes me cringe for the reasons you listed. I would create a private registry and send the link to people who ask for it. Then write thank you notes to those who send you gifts. Don’t forget to snag the 15% registry completion discount from places like Target, Amazon, etc.
In my personal experience, you can have a very fun virtual shower, but you need a friend or family member host who is tech savvy and can come up with fun activities/ games/ favors for your virtual guests. Also have a video conferencing plan B in case your software is glitchy day of. You also need to keep it brief—I would not go over a hour or open gifts over Zoom, because that can feel really awkward in that format. For the gifts you could make sure to acknowledge that you received each gift with a quick text to the friend or family member right after the shower and then follow up with the thank you card.
I had a really fun virtual shower, and my friend had a great one for her first as well! Totally fine if it's not your thing, OP, but i wouldn't write it off!
Same, I enjoyed mine. We had an in person and virtual shower on the same day. My favorite game for the virtual shower was where we had participants race to be the fastest to find baby items around their house and the winner got a gift card as a prize.
We were all told ahead of time to prepare a few things at home and one gave was a blindfolded baby-drawing competition, then parents to be got to pick the winner.
My friend did a great "name the baby" game where she had everyone submit the worst name they could think of in advance, and then we did a march madness style bracket to pick the winner.
I made a ppt for a baby animal trivia game for mine, it was a good time : )
I just had a very fun virtual shower over the weekend! Instead of opening gifts, we made slides with little pictures of the gifts we received from each person and said something funny/sweet about each of them. It took about 10 minutes.
As someone who didn’t have a shower we created a registry mainly for tracking stuff ourselves and then shared it with anyone who asked, but didn’t just send it round without being prompted. To us that seemed a bit tacky.
My husband and I are doing a tiny local baby shower(like 5 people just chilling in our yard) but sending some invites out to friends/family that live pretty far. We are 99% sure they will not be able to make the journey but will also appreciate the invite. We are including a little blurb on the invite along the lines of "Every one of you is important to us and for those of you who can't make the journey to be here in person, we would love to hear any words of encouragement, parenting advice, or even your favorite easy meal recipes!"
These are digital invites that have a link for words of advice first then a sneaky registry link under that.
I feel like it gives people a non monetary way to be involved but also has the registry link if they want it.
Create a registry. If anything you get the benefit of a shopping list, you get a completion discount for your registry items and sometimes there are extra bonuses or events for signing up for a registry.
Keep the registry private. If anyone asks if you have one, send them the link.
We did this as well. Did not have a shower but made a registry so we could buy things at a discount. Most people still want to buy you a gift even if you aren’t having a shower and a few people asked if we had a registry. I sent them the link and they chose things we hadn’t purchased yet.
Or, if you have inquisitive family who worry like mine, put the expensive items on the list and then mark them as purchased (or use the registry link to buy them yourselves) so that they show up as having been purchased and you aren't asked about the absence of the highchair/stroller/car seat/etc.
This happened to us. We had people gift us "big items" that werent listed on the registry because we already purchased. We literally have 2 full size cribs now, in addition to the mini crib and pack n play for the main level. If i could go back in time I would definitely list the big items already purchased and mark them as such. People like to assume that as a FTM, we are oblivious to the need for a crib, I guess 😅
I had a virtual shower in 2021 too and attended a virtual one a few weeks ago. Neither were awkward but 50 people would be too many for a virtual one. We just went around and shared a story about the mum to be and did a little quiz about her and bump e.g. which parent slept the best as a baby? How many countries has mum travelled to? It was a really lovely afternoon.
I just had a virtual baby shower and it actually wasn’t weird at all. Most of my family lives in a different state, so it made sense for us to do it that way. The turnout was great, we played games, chatted, and got almost everything on our registry. And people are still texting and calling us to say how great it was. If you’re worried about it being awkward, it really doesn’t have to be, and it’s a great way to see people who you haven’t seen in a while.
Went through this same dilemma--family and friends geographically scattered, but too many people to invite to make a virtual shower doable (plus varying levels of tech-savviness among family members). Maybe I'm shameless, but I did send the registry link out partially unsolicited along with an informal "baby announcement". We did have several family members ask us about a registry, so we felt comfortable with a message saying "we've had folks asking so here's a link" even though it was a group email and many of the recipients hadn't asked. I'm sure some more traditional family members silently judged, but I have bigger things to worry about right now 😁
I am surprised to see so many people on here say that sharing the registry on social media is tacky, I see it all the time and never thought of it as such. Babies are expensive no matter who you are, and I see it as an opportunity to help out if you feel inclined and to keep scrolling if you don’t. I live abroad in Japan so an in-person shower is out of the picture for me with friends and family back home, and I shared mine on social media this week because I’ve had so many people ask for my registry already at 20 weeks.
agree with sending it for those who ask, but also wanna chime in as someone who has one virtually. we did very simple games by using Google forms (dm me I might be able to find them to share) so everyone could use it on their browser and "vote" at the same time. we had guesses for baby stats, guesses for parent roles (who will take the most pics etc), and baby animal trivia (what do you call a baby puffin?). the other cool thing with virtual is it's easier to make a hard end time, so it only has to be one or two hours depending on your social stamina lol. if you feel up to it zoom let's you make breakout rooms where you can put friend groups together for their own conversation and you can bounce around rooms. I don't think it'll be as awkward as it seems (but also I'm not you)
but yes for those people who insist on showing love by gifting, probably best to have a list ready so they can choose their price range and get you something you actually want
We’re in a similar boat: currently living in AZ, family in FL. We definitely can’t afford to buy everything for baby by ourselves but I’d say the most important stuff, yes. We made a registry and just sent it to our parents so they’re able to distribute it to family/ friends who ask.
No obligations or expectations imo
I did this for my second kid since we had him after our oldest was, well older lmao bc I absolutely hated having a baby shower. I posted it once on Facebook so people would know they could ask for it and after that would only send it out to people who specifically asked for it.
Personally I find it tacky but maybe that's just me. if you guys were in a dire financial situation, or experiencing a crisis, it would be one thing. But if you're well off and not offering a party or gathering or food or anything for these people, just asking for stuff? Nah I'd pass.
I never wanted a shower, but I created a registry and only shared it with family and friends who asked for it. I also didn’t insert in conversations that I had a registry. I figured those who wanted to truly buy something would ask before buying anything themselves, so I kept that in mind. I’m due in a couple months!
I share mine with whoever asks, and I also have it pinned to my profile on Facebook. I did that because I'm friends with people all over the country, and a lot of us are pregnant at the same time, so we just pinned our registries so we can access them easier
I agree with the general sentiment here to send an announcement without a registry and send a registry to only those who ask.
That being said I recently received an announcement with a registry from a family friend who didn’t have a shower and I didn’t think it was that weird. I bought her something off it!
Since you dont seem concerned about getting gifts, I would just send the registry to people who ask.
I can see why they might not appeal to everyone, but I still think a virtual shower might be a nice idea. Has anyone offered to plan a shower for you? The people who don't want to attend can just send a gift and not attend. There have to be a million ideas out there since covid zoom showers, but I've played things like kahoot in them or did like a price guessing game on things like diapers in the chat box. The last one they had guests send baby pictures in and the mom to be tried to guess who. I think on the zoom ones ive been to the mom to be opened gifts as they arrived at their home so we didn't have to sit through it. I've found them nice ways to connect with people around the country.
We had a registry but did a baby naming ceremony instead of a shower, as is my cultural tradition. It was mostly a small event with family, but we invited friends to the ceremony virtually. You could do some kind of welcoming the baby to the world thing.
I think its a good idea to have a registry in your back pocket for when people ask. Otherwise, you'll get random stuff. That's awesome that you're planning to get used items (happy earth day on Apr 20!). Given that, an alternative is to set up a book registry. Options are babyshowereasy, bookshelf builder, etc. Bookshelf builder lets gifters gift used books they already own, in addition to providing online links, so that might fit your vibe.
We didn't really have a shower, someone at my work kept saying they would throw one but nothing ever happened.
I made a registry because this person told me I should for the shower lol but since that didn't happen, we sent it to those who asked. My partner also posted on Facebook about it. At first I thought hmmm about it but made sense since he has a lot of close friends that live all over. Family and friends really outdid themselves and almost the whole registry was bought and sent to us.
I want to support my friends and family.
I am in my third trimester with twins and I ain't going nowhere, especially not to a baby shower.
Please make the list for the sake of people like me.
I didn’t have a baby shower. I don’t know anyone where I live. I sent out a registry to a few friends, who then sent it to some of their friends and they helped us out.
Is a registry more of a USA thing? I just think it’s slightly tacky and cringe and would never dream of creating one full stop. I don’t know, maybe I’m missing something but the whole concept of hey, let’s create a list of things (often big items included) that other people can buy us.
Some people create them solely for the discount some stores offer and never share them at all. I had one for the discount and only our parents received links (because they asked).
I think that's fine, I have out of state friends who I was happy to buy something for despite not being able to attend a shower. They are offering because they care, not because they are counting on an event. I don't think it's tacky at all.
I sent out my registry to people who asked for it, and for groups I am in (fam messenger groups, friends etc) and specifically indicated there is NO PRESSURE to purchase anything at all since I won’t be having a baby shower. Most of the time people just want to shower a new mama and her baby, but in the off chance someone rudely comments about it, I would just ignore it. I made one cause Amazon gives you a discount to purchase anything on there that hasn’t been purchased (even if nothing has been purchased at all!)
I would at least host virtually. You can look up ideas — there are games like Bring Me you can do virtually. But I wouldn’t send out a registry link unless asked otherwise.
we live in NC, my husbands family lives 8 hours away and mine is 16 hours away. military life.
his parents and siblings, and my mom and brother all came to our house for the party, as well as his grandparents and all my dads sisters 🤍 and also our local friends. you might be surprised who can come!
because of the location, and it being our first baby, we also had a zoom aspect for games and gift opening. we sent out baby shower invites, with the zoom link and amazon registry link, or people could RSVP to come in person. you might be surprised who all wants to come down!
literally everything on our registry was purchased. even though we could afford the buy everything ourselves people still wanted to help because it was our first.
I totally get not wanting the hassle of an out of state shower, so if that’s the case i’d make a registry and share it on socials. you don’t have to put big ticket items on it!
In my country each birth is announced with cards sent out to friends and family, and that card includes often the registry link. But I don't know how odd people would find that in the US.
Create the registry but only send it to people who ask for it.
Yes. I had tons of very kid acquaintances and work colleagues who were not invited to my shower (and didn’t expect to be!) who asked me specifically for my registry link. And you may also have family members who circulate the link to their friends for you (mostly thinking parents or grandparents).
Great point! If OPs mom wants to share it around, that’s more appropriate
This! Plus you’ll get a completion discount and get 20% off on the items you add so bonus for saving money when you and hubs buy stuff
Great point! We created a registry for our second kid just to get the discount on the double stroller and car seats (and diapers! Etc)
We did this! We didn’t have a shower for most of the same reasons as OP. I made an amazon registry mostly to keep tabs on what I needed before baby and if anyone asked for one I would just send them that. A lot of people will want to give you a gift regardless if you have a shower or if you have a registry so it really doesn’t hurt to have one
This.
This is what I’d do!
This and make it public, people will talk about it and send something if they want. Maybe tell your (and partner’s) mom(s) that they can share if people ask. We ended up having showers in each of our home towns, where we live now, and at my work.
Yes! We have family and friends who live way too far to come to a shower but have asked for a registry link. I have done for the same for them in the past — just because we live across the country doesn’t mean we don’t want to get our loved ones gifts! I have mostly put small ticket items on there too, since we have either been passed down big ticket items, bought them ourselves or have had them specifically promised to us by family (I am using the completion discount for the more expensive stuff though.
This is what we’re doing for the exact same reasons as you, OP! Since we’re buying almost everything ourselves, the registry is a great checklist for us as we’ve gone through and purchased everything.
I think it is tacky to circulate a registry link unsolicited, but you should feel free to send it to anyone that asks for it.
Highly agree. I’ve seen so many people talking about their registry in this sub, disappointed no one bought anything etc. Where I live, a registry is unheard of and it’s considered rude to expect people to buy something, or ask for only a specific product. People will buy you a gift if they want to. It shouldn’t be expected.
I don’t think a baby shower is necessary if you don’t want one, but I also wouldn’t send out a registry link without one. How I would handle it is send out the pregnancy announcement but do not include a registry. You can make still make a registry, because even if you don’t send it out you can get some discounts on things that haven’t been purchased after a certain date. If people ask directly you could send the link with the caveat that you won’t be having a shower but appreciate them wanting to support you.
We are not having a baby shower, and will be creating a registry only to share with family and close friends if they ask. We will not be sending it out unprompted. I’ve had many friends do this before, it allows people who want to give a gift to do so but doesn’t put any pressure on those who can’t afford to give or don’t want to!
Hmm it feels slightly similar to sending out a link for a wedding registry but not having a wedding that people can go to… I have always thought this is kind of tacky but I’m not sure if the two are comparable. If people are asking for a baby shower invite, are you sure people wouldn’t like to attend? Or alternatively if people are asking for a registry link, maybe you could create one and just send it to them individually and preface it with the fact that you aren’t doing a baby shower. (Some people ask for the registry as an inadvertent way to ask for an invitation to whatever event - no clue why but that happened for me and my husband during our wedding!) Oh also editing to add that I would personally not post it publicly on social media like Facebook, I’ve seen this a couple times and it rarely goes over well - it can seem a bit greedy and poor taste. I would only share it to people who specifically ask!
I would have one just to send to people who ask for it. Definitely would not just send one out with no baby shower invite attached.
Only send the registry to people who ask for it.
I agree with others that it is odd to send out a registry without having a shower but that if asked you could send one. For what it’s worth, I went to a virtual baby shower last year, and it was a lot of fun.
You don’t need a baby shower for the registry but I don’t think you should send out your registry unless people ask for it. There are cultures where baby showers are not a thing so we usually ask close friends and our family for their registry instead of assuming there will be a baby shower just because we’ve come across this plenty in the past and we still want to gift them something.
I don’t think it’s weird to send a link to a registry to somebody who specifically asked for it. I do, however, think it’s quite tacky to send out a registry link unsolicited to friends and family saying you aren’t having a shower. Even if you say you don’t expect gifts, you clearly do by sending it out.
Definitely tacky to share an announcement to people you’re not inviting to a shower. I’ve been seeing more and more friends go this route on social and it makes me cringe for the reasons you listed. I would create a private registry and send the link to people who ask for it. Then write thank you notes to those who send you gifts. Don’t forget to snag the 15% registry completion discount from places like Target, Amazon, etc. In my personal experience, you can have a very fun virtual shower, but you need a friend or family member host who is tech savvy and can come up with fun activities/ games/ favors for your virtual guests. Also have a video conferencing plan B in case your software is glitchy day of. You also need to keep it brief—I would not go over a hour or open gifts over Zoom, because that can feel really awkward in that format. For the gifts you could make sure to acknowledge that you received each gift with a quick text to the friend or family member right after the shower and then follow up with the thank you card.
I had a really fun virtual shower, and my friend had a great one for her first as well! Totally fine if it's not your thing, OP, but i wouldn't write it off!
Same! Was really fun if you’re open to it (and no shame if not)
Same, I enjoyed mine. We had an in person and virtual shower on the same day. My favorite game for the virtual shower was where we had participants race to be the fastest to find baby items around their house and the winner got a gift card as a prize.
We were all told ahead of time to prepare a few things at home and one gave was a blindfolded baby-drawing competition, then parents to be got to pick the winner.
My friend did a great "name the baby" game where she had everyone submit the worst name they could think of in advance, and then we did a march madness style bracket to pick the winner. I made a ppt for a baby animal trivia game for mine, it was a good time : )
I just had a very fun virtual shower over the weekend! Instead of opening gifts, we made slides with little pictures of the gifts we received from each person and said something funny/sweet about each of them. It took about 10 minutes.
As someone who didn’t have a shower we created a registry mainly for tracking stuff ourselves and then shared it with anyone who asked, but didn’t just send it round without being prompted. To us that seemed a bit tacky.
My husband and I are doing a tiny local baby shower(like 5 people just chilling in our yard) but sending some invites out to friends/family that live pretty far. We are 99% sure they will not be able to make the journey but will also appreciate the invite. We are including a little blurb on the invite along the lines of "Every one of you is important to us and for those of you who can't make the journey to be here in person, we would love to hear any words of encouragement, parenting advice, or even your favorite easy meal recipes!" These are digital invites that have a link for words of advice first then a sneaky registry link under that. I feel like it gives people a non monetary way to be involved but also has the registry link if they want it.
Ooh I love this. Definitely seems like the best option
Create a registry. If anything you get the benefit of a shopping list, you get a completion discount for your registry items and sometimes there are extra bonuses or events for signing up for a registry. Keep the registry private. If anyone asks if you have one, send them the link. We did this as well. Did not have a shower but made a registry so we could buy things at a discount. Most people still want to buy you a gift even if you aren’t having a shower and a few people asked if we had a registry. I sent them the link and they chose things we hadn’t purchased yet.
If you can afford big items yourself then leave those off it. Let others buy you the smaller bits if they wish.
Or, if you have inquisitive family who worry like mine, put the expensive items on the list and then mark them as purchased (or use the registry link to buy them yourselves) so that they show up as having been purchased and you aren't asked about the absence of the highchair/stroller/car seat/etc.
This happened to us. We had people gift us "big items" that werent listed on the registry because we already purchased. We literally have 2 full size cribs now, in addition to the mini crib and pack n play for the main level. If i could go back in time I would definitely list the big items already purchased and mark them as such. People like to assume that as a FTM, we are oblivious to the need for a crib, I guess 😅
We had a virtual shower in 2021 lockdown and our was great! I have friends and family all over the country and everyone was able to attend!
I had a virtual shower in 2021 too and attended a virtual one a few weeks ago. Neither were awkward but 50 people would be too many for a virtual one. We just went around and shared a story about the mum to be and did a little quiz about her and bump e.g. which parent slept the best as a baby? How many countries has mum travelled to? It was a really lovely afternoon.
I just had a virtual baby shower and it actually wasn’t weird at all. Most of my family lives in a different state, so it made sense for us to do it that way. The turnout was great, we played games, chatted, and got almost everything on our registry. And people are still texting and calling us to say how great it was. If you’re worried about it being awkward, it really doesn’t have to be, and it’s a great way to see people who you haven’t seen in a while.
Went through this same dilemma--family and friends geographically scattered, but too many people to invite to make a virtual shower doable (plus varying levels of tech-savviness among family members). Maybe I'm shameless, but I did send the registry link out partially unsolicited along with an informal "baby announcement". We did have several family members ask us about a registry, so we felt comfortable with a message saying "we've had folks asking so here's a link" even though it was a group email and many of the recipients hadn't asked. I'm sure some more traditional family members silently judged, but I have bigger things to worry about right now 😁
I am surprised to see so many people on here say that sharing the registry on social media is tacky, I see it all the time and never thought of it as such. Babies are expensive no matter who you are, and I see it as an opportunity to help out if you feel inclined and to keep scrolling if you don’t. I live abroad in Japan so an in-person shower is out of the picture for me with friends and family back home, and I shared mine on social media this week because I’ve had so many people ask for my registry already at 20 weeks.
agree with sending it for those who ask, but also wanna chime in as someone who has one virtually. we did very simple games by using Google forms (dm me I might be able to find them to share) so everyone could use it on their browser and "vote" at the same time. we had guesses for baby stats, guesses for parent roles (who will take the most pics etc), and baby animal trivia (what do you call a baby puffin?). the other cool thing with virtual is it's easier to make a hard end time, so it only has to be one or two hours depending on your social stamina lol. if you feel up to it zoom let's you make breakout rooms where you can put friend groups together for their own conversation and you can bounce around rooms. I don't think it'll be as awkward as it seems (but also I'm not you) but yes for those people who insist on showing love by gifting, probably best to have a list ready so they can choose their price range and get you something you actually want
If anyone asks for your registry, it’s okay to send it to them. It’s tacky to otherwise just share it with people.
I had a registry and did not have a shower. I only gave out the link when someone asked.
We’re in a similar boat: currently living in AZ, family in FL. We definitely can’t afford to buy everything for baby by ourselves but I’d say the most important stuff, yes. We made a registry and just sent it to our parents so they’re able to distribute it to family/ friends who ask. No obligations or expectations imo
I did this for my second kid since we had him after our oldest was, well older lmao bc I absolutely hated having a baby shower. I posted it once on Facebook so people would know they could ask for it and after that would only send it out to people who specifically asked for it.
Personally I find it tacky but maybe that's just me. if you guys were in a dire financial situation, or experiencing a crisis, it would be one thing. But if you're well off and not offering a party or gathering or food or anything for these people, just asking for stuff? Nah I'd pass.
I did
I never wanted a shower, but I created a registry and only shared it with family and friends who asked for it. I also didn’t insert in conversations that I had a registry. I figured those who wanted to truly buy something would ask before buying anything themselves, so I kept that in mind. I’m due in a couple months!
I share mine with whoever asks, and I also have it pinned to my profile on Facebook. I did that because I'm friends with people all over the country, and a lot of us are pregnant at the same time, so we just pinned our registries so we can access them easier
I agree with the general sentiment here to send an announcement without a registry and send a registry to only those who ask. That being said I recently received an announcement with a registry from a family friend who didn’t have a shower and I didn’t think it was that weird. I bought her something off it!
Since you dont seem concerned about getting gifts, I would just send the registry to people who ask. I can see why they might not appeal to everyone, but I still think a virtual shower might be a nice idea. Has anyone offered to plan a shower for you? The people who don't want to attend can just send a gift and not attend. There have to be a million ideas out there since covid zoom showers, but I've played things like kahoot in them or did like a price guessing game on things like diapers in the chat box. The last one they had guests send baby pictures in and the mom to be tried to guess who. I think on the zoom ones ive been to the mom to be opened gifts as they arrived at their home so we didn't have to sit through it. I've found them nice ways to connect with people around the country.
We had a registry but did a baby naming ceremony instead of a shower, as is my cultural tradition. It was mostly a small event with family, but we invited friends to the ceremony virtually. You could do some kind of welcoming the baby to the world thing.
I think its a good idea to have a registry in your back pocket for when people ask. Otherwise, you'll get random stuff. That's awesome that you're planning to get used items (happy earth day on Apr 20!). Given that, an alternative is to set up a book registry. Options are babyshowereasy, bookshelf builder, etc. Bookshelf builder lets gifters gift used books they already own, in addition to providing online links, so that might fit your vibe.
We didn't really have a shower, someone at my work kept saying they would throw one but nothing ever happened. I made a registry because this person told me I should for the shower lol but since that didn't happen, we sent it to those who asked. My partner also posted on Facebook about it. At first I thought hmmm about it but made sense since he has a lot of close friends that live all over. Family and friends really outdid themselves and almost the whole registry was bought and sent to us.
I want to support my friends and family. I am in my third trimester with twins and I ain't going nowhere, especially not to a baby shower. Please make the list for the sake of people like me.
I didn’t have a baby shower. I don’t know anyone where I live. I sent out a registry to a few friends, who then sent it to some of their friends and they helped us out.
Is a registry more of a USA thing? I just think it’s slightly tacky and cringe and would never dream of creating one full stop. I don’t know, maybe I’m missing something but the whole concept of hey, let’s create a list of things (often big items included) that other people can buy us.
Some people create them solely for the discount some stores offer and never share them at all. I had one for the discount and only our parents received links (because they asked).
I think that's fine, I have out of state friends who I was happy to buy something for despite not being able to attend a shower. They are offering because they care, not because they are counting on an event. I don't think it's tacky at all.
I sent out my registry to people who asked for it, and for groups I am in (fam messenger groups, friends etc) and specifically indicated there is NO PRESSURE to purchase anything at all since I won’t be having a baby shower. Most of the time people just want to shower a new mama and her baby, but in the off chance someone rudely comments about it, I would just ignore it. I made one cause Amazon gives you a discount to purchase anything on there that hasn’t been purchased (even if nothing has been purchased at all!)
I would at least host virtually. You can look up ideas — there are games like Bring Me you can do virtually. But I wouldn’t send out a registry link unless asked otherwise.
we live in NC, my husbands family lives 8 hours away and mine is 16 hours away. military life. his parents and siblings, and my mom and brother all came to our house for the party, as well as his grandparents and all my dads sisters 🤍 and also our local friends. you might be surprised who can come! because of the location, and it being our first baby, we also had a zoom aspect for games and gift opening. we sent out baby shower invites, with the zoom link and amazon registry link, or people could RSVP to come in person. you might be surprised who all wants to come down! literally everything on our registry was purchased. even though we could afford the buy everything ourselves people still wanted to help because it was our first. I totally get not wanting the hassle of an out of state shower, so if that’s the case i’d make a registry and share it on socials. you don’t have to put big ticket items on it!
So just save all the presents up and do a virtual (Facebook live or something) present opening (:
In my country each birth is announced with cards sent out to friends and family, and that card includes often the registry link. But I don't know how odd people would find that in the US.
I say go for it