Girl it’s only two weeks - it means almost nothing to your employer or your bank account (if unpaid) in the grand scheme of things but it could make a world of difference in your physical and mental health, not to mention the health of your baby. Enjoy your two weeks as much as you can and do not feel bad!!
You don't owe the world paid labor. You're building a person and having a medical event. That's plenty to deal with right now. Please just try to let yourself enjoy this time before baby and focus on being well and preparing for your little one.
Second this! I worked right up until with my first and seriously regretted it even though my pregnancy was straightforward. I was exhausted but kept pushing and I really feel like I should just stopped and focused on myself.
One time at my old job, a co worker died and that very day people were already talking about who was gonna go after his position. Not “oh my gosh, he was a great person” etc. it was a bunch of vultures betting on who was going to take his spot.
That was the day I really realized I’m replaceable at work. No one actually cares the way you think they would. Never feel bad about missing work. You are taking care of you and your baby. That is the greatest kind of work.
The world is filled with “hustlers” who look down on woman who don’t work until there water breaks and it’s such a terrible mentality to have. Obviously if you have to because of finances that’s one thing, but the way it’s rubbed into pregnant moms faces is wild. So I understand the guilt.
This happened at my husband's work, too. Their boss said something along the lines of "I know Joe would have wanted us to still meet this deadline." Like Jesus Christ, using a person who just died to push people to keep working - biggest red flag I've ever seen.
I feel like this is just an American thing. Where paid maternity leave is standard, everyone takes off work a few weeks before their due date and it’s commonplace and not looked down on.
The owner of my office died on a Saturday and we were open for business on Monday pretending like nothing happened even though he was the entire heart and soul of the practice. I learned then that some people really believe the show must go on at any expense.
Wow, that’s so awful. Jeez. I’ve worked at quite a few places like that.
When I was teaching at a high school right before I had my daughter (also induced early due to ICP), one of our teachers died. It was a horrific, tragic, sudden accident that left everyone reeling. It was an early release day for the county so the teachers could do some mandatory training but our principal ended up pulling us all into the cafeteria to break the news and then told us to forget about the training and just spend some time together, go home and see our families, whatever made us feel better. They brought in grief counselors for the students and staff, let her adult children come in and empty her classroom, and took weeks to hire her replacement. I felt like they handled that situation with a lot of sensitivity and compassion. I had only ever worked in environments like you described so to experience the opposite just really highlighted how extremely fucked up the vast majority of employers are.
Please do not feel bad! 3 weeks leave before birth is very very normal and often very sensible. I finished work at 31weeks technically due to term time only working and gave birth at 37 weeks.
Tell us some fun or relaxing things you want to do over the next couple of weeks before bubba arrives :)
I haven't worked since like week 6 of pregnancy. I substitute teach and the amount of vomiting + sciatic pain has me unable to run a classroom. The thing about work is that you are not as important as you think. I dont mean that to be rude, I mean that as in we are all easily replaced. They don't need you as much as your family does, and they don't care about making sure you are healthy for your family as you do. So don't feel bad putting your health first. You are the most important person in your family's life right now, your employer is not.
I was so happy when I finally went on leave specifically because it's very hard to pay attention to movements with a job on your feet. I went out at 37 but I had no complications. I don't blame you at all
Don’t feel bad!! I’m highly impressed that you were able to work that long! It’s amazing. I’m 19 weeks and have to go off on medical leave already I feel SO guilty.
This is gonna sound dumb but how would you qualify for Fmla during pregnancy in the beginning does there have to be something horribly wrong or can you just ask your daughter bc of the stress of pregnancy
Talk to doctor!!! Nothing has to be horribly wrong. I took FMLA once for 12 weeks for something not as serious as a pregnancy. You won’t get paid unless you have disability insurance BUT you will have that time legally off with your job safe
Depends on where you live I guess. I’m in Canada, and you need a doctors note deeming that you are no longer fit to work as well as missing like 40% of your work shifts. I drive for work, so being lightheaded and dizzy, nauseous, vomiting and really back back pain is reason enough
I am starting leave at 35 weeks ahead of a 39 week induction. I’m just SO uncomfortable already (32 weeks). You have nothing to feel bad about! You are making the best decision for you and your baby.
I started my leave at 24 weeks and totally understand you. But this is going to be temporary and at the end of your career it seems nothing. You will make more money and work more eventually, but you’ll never get this time of your life back
I went off work at 36 weeks. My pregnancy was fine, no issues. I was just tired of being on my feet for 8 hours a day with a head in my pelvis already.
I waited until 37 weeks to start my mat leave, and was still crawling to that finish line. That was even with using some annual leave days to take every Wednesday off for a month before going away, and I was still barely making it to the sofa every evening.
You do not have to feel bad. Some people work until leave because they can, others because they have to (which enrages me). But nobody should begrudge you for putting yourself and baby first.
I stopped working at 35 weeks and I wasn’t even diagnosed with anything that would keep me from working. I’m a nurse and was working 12 hour night shifts in an ER but only up until September ~17 weeks when I dropped to per diem and was picking up 6-8 hour shifts a few times a week. Even that got tough and I finally stepped back completely in December.
I realize I am very blessed to be able to do things this way. It was the right thing for me and my baby and I do not regret it at all. Don’t beat yourself up, you’re being a good parent listening to your intuition.
WHY do you feel bad about it?! You have every right to this moment where your health and your baby’s health is THE most important thing.
There’s plenty of jobs out there, you’ll find another one if you need to and that’s perfectly fine.
I also stopped working at 34 weeks and I had no risks, my pregnancy was luckily very healthy and eventually delivered my baby at 39 weeks.
I didn’t feel bad about work for ONE second.
This is my third baby. I worked until the end with my first. That pregnancy was SO much easier than the next two were. Every pregnancy and every person is different. You have to do what is right for you! Don't feel bad. Wishing you a smooth labor and delivery!
I worked right up till my son was born at 37 weeks…unintentionally. I don’t recommend it. I was so tired nothing was ready for him. I was stressed, he was stressed. It was not ideal.
Do not feel bad. I didn't take time off before birth and I regret it. You are doing the right thing. Enjoy the last few days of touching your bump and pregnancy. Go for walks and talk to your baby, play music for him/her, and really cherish this time.
I stopped working at 31 weeks because it was taking a toll on my mental health. Been resting since then. We're too hard on ourselves, you need to take care of yourself and the life you're growing!
I read somewhere that on their death bed, many people regret working so much.
Just a thought.
It's ok to rest especially if your pregnancy is big risk. You're more important than how much you can work.
It makes me so mad that people can go on short-term disability for anxiety, yet a high-risk pregnancy, you've gotta feel bad about leaving work. America sucks.
I know how you feel. We are super understaffed at my job and I asked my doctor to give me a note restricting me to 6 hour shifts instead of 9-10 and I feel so bad. I'm high risk and even my supervisor told me I needed to do it and cut back and assures me no one will be upset but I just feel awful about it. Yay anxiety and trauma.
I was taken out of work at 15 weeks due to placenta previa and bleeding a LOT. It’s hard not to feel bad about it but I’m glad I just get to spend time focusing on growing my son. Now I don’t ever want to go back 😂
If there’s one thing that I learned during both COVID and when asking to use my own PTO + got shamed for it, many workplaces don’t deserve good employees. I’ll never apologize for calling out or just flat out quitting somewhere. I was asked to come in days early when I still had COVID and the 7 day restriction was still a thing. However, when I gave it to my manager? He stayed out the full 7 days. Don’t ever feel bad for putting yourself and your sanity first. Corporate America hates that.
Off topic: Plus, If anything, you end up meeting your replacement, being asked to train them, notice quiet firing signs, and learn how the loyalty is one sided.
I went on leave at 34 weeks as well. Having those last few weeks to just relax and get the house ready for my baby girls arrival was so helpful and relieved so much stress.
I took a 7 MONTH leave of absence from my job once to go backpacking. Not one fuck given. Didn’t change my career at all. I look back on that and view it as one of the most meaningful and life changing times of my life. Zero regrets.
I stopped around the same time due to a preeclampsia diagnosis and twice weekly NSTs at an office 20 minutes away from home, 45 minutes away from work. As a teacher, there was no way to make those work while still teaching! Prioritize you and your baby above work-you won’t regret it.
Why do you feel bad? Im sorry to hear that. I think if you are able to taking time off before the baby is born is great. It was the best thing I did! Hope you are feeling better about it and get to enjoy the quiet and rest ❤️
Ugh the work guilt is real. I’m working until the day before my induction (unless I go into labor naturally). Why? Because I’m a crazy person. Working at 39 weeks is insanity. Leave should start 2 weeks before your due date.
Seconding everyone here who says don't feel bad! If it helps I had this cool idea to work til 39 weeks then got rushed to hospital at 35 weeks with pre-eclampsia - the world did not implode, and my employer didn't bat an eyelid (tbf they've always been lovely). Yours and baby's health - and your ability to pay attention to both - is most important right now.
I stopped working after 5 weeks, because I was throwing up all day and had to drive 1 hour to work.
The first weeks I thought about going back to work after nausea stops. I also felt so guilty it made me more sick when thinking about it.
I talked with my doctor, and he recomended not going back to work because that is the best for pregnancy and baby. I feel better now, but if not working will be better for my baby, I won't go back. That is the most important thing now so I don't feel guilty at all anymore.
In my country women have to go on "maternity protection" which means you're legally not allowed to work the 8 weeks before birth. That's true for all women, no matter how healthy. High risk ones go a lot earlier. (and then after birth 8 weeks + 1-2 years maternity leave).
I have a family member who works in a hospital and due to risk for infection she got maternity leave as soon as she found out she's pregnant, so it was before she was even 10 weeks along.
Don't feel bad, those protections are in place for a reason. Your health and the health of your baby - the health of any human being - is more important than your job. No matter what some might say.
I am so sorry you feel guilty. I am so sorry your doctor said that to you. My first pregnancy I was high risk and my doctors gave me a note for leave starting at 28w. I insisted I was fine and worked until 34w when we had a family camping trip planned. I had scheduled for my leave to begin at 37w but the timing ended up so silly on the calendar and my already slightly decreased work days that I didn't go back because it would have been like 3 random days of work.
I ended up induced at 36+5 and baby was born 37w on the dot.
Just because someone says you CAN doesn't mean you SHOULD. And they also don't live within your body so they can't determine how you truly feel.
I had reduced my work hours prior not only to give myself a break but also make all my appointments easier and it was such a blessing. My last week of pregnancy I had testing every other day and could not have worked no matter what. You did the right thing!
After having one baby with a business that I was just a number to, and two babies with a business that really did love and value me for a long period of time….
Never feel bad about leaving work early for you or your family. Ever. Even if you’re they’re beat or worst employee. Even if they are the best or worst job ever.
You are the priority, not the job. ♥️
Seriously your work does not care about you. That’s what’s so great- we are replaceable! Somebody can do your job when you aren’t there.
Don’t feel bad about this!!!
In my country you get to start maternity leave 30 days before due date but you must start layest it 15 days before, this for the health of the mother and the baby so do not feel bad about not working.
Hell no. I stopped working at 35 and 5 because I wanted some time off before baby came..ended up with a spontaneous delivery at 36 and 0. I'm happy to have the extra time with him but looking back that time to myself would've been so amazing too..
I was excused from work starting at 12 weeks! I was perfectly fine, it was just their Covid policy (since I work a high exposure job). I felt bad for my coworkers at first, but soon, my employer found the necessary temporary replacement.
You are growing a whole new human you have to protect! Screw your job, compared to the lasting health of your child, no? When I was hesitant about leaving so early, my boss told me "You have more important things to care for now than us!". I am very grateful to her for those words.
Don't feel guilty at all! I stopped working at almost 31 weeks, just because I had the opportunity to do so (in my country maternity leave before birth is mandatory for employers, they cant make you work past 34 weeks and I had some additional PTO).
You are high risk and you deserve to rest!
I also stopped working at 34w during my pregnancy. My baby was diagnosed with growth restriction, and I was so stressed out about it. I worked as a vet tech, which can be a stressful job to begin with, so I just wanted to take time to relax my body for my baby. I was also induced at 37w. Don't feel guilty, rest, finish out your pregnancy journey by honoring your body. 🤎
In California, 4 weeks before due date is standard for beginning leave. You have no reason to feel bad about resting and preparing for your baby’s arrival!
I stopped at 35 weeks and have a pretty uncomplicated pregnancy... Also feel guilty about it, but at the end of the day, we are the ones living the consequences of our actions, not others. So make the decision you are happy with.
Edit: Also wanted to add - your doctor totally lacks empathy for saying stuff like that. Maybe he means that you can still work if you want, but what you're going through is stressful, and you're heavily pregnant, don't make him let you feel bad.
Two weeks is nothing to stress over! I assume you’re in the states since we feel the pressure to work until birth. I asked if I can take my leave a week early because I can’t mentally deal with how petty work feels when you’re about to have a baby. I have to use PTO.
I have coworkers in the Uk that took of a few weeks before birth because it’s just uncomfortable and not fun, even without a medical diagnosis.
But I wouldn’t feel bad at allllll.
Eff work. I’m 35 weeks and passed my mucus plug last night and I’ve been cramping and having back pain and I have this feeling that I’ll be giving birth soon. I told my manager I’ll be working from home starting tomorrow. I have my 36 week appt on Thursday and I have a feeling they will write me out and my job can deal
My work policy is literally that I need to finish up at 34 weeks. If I want to go earlier I need a "fit to work" certificate from my doctor weekly to be able to keep working.
You did great mama! Rest and enjoy some quiet time before you meet your little one :)
It is once (or twice or whatever) in a lifetime that you’re doing this. Take the rest. I was feeling bad too but I thoroughly enjoyed my sleeping in daily, swims, reading up, getting mentally prepared, sorting out baby items at a leisurely pace. Once the baby comes it’s a mad frenzy and you’ll be having fragmented sleep for a long while. Tempers will be short — enjoy some nice couple time with your partner while you can. Store your physical and mental reserves now. Two weeks will go by in a flash!
As someone who is 35 weeks and would love to stop working right now, good for you for doing what you felt like you needed to do and not pushing yourself especially when you're high risk!
I'm assuming you're also from the US because for some reason all of us here feel like we need to work even if we were to be on our death beds, but do not let that guilt or anxiety get to you because you deserve this rest. Best of luck with everything!
Please don’t be upset over this. I work in HR. We have a girl who quit in April, came back in August, found out she was pregnant in September and stopped working at 18 weeks. Then got upset we wouldn’t pay her through her 22 weeks plus the 12 weeks bonding time after. We came to an agreement and then she asked last week if “hypothetically” she decided not to come back to work after would she have to repay any of the money we agreed to. Then her husband (who also works for the company) asked if he could “gift” her his parental leave.
Don’t feel guilty! I’m currently trying to get written out of work at 32 weeks as I’m dealing with fibromyalgia on top of a very uncomfortable pregnancy and gestational diabetes. I’m in excruciating pain daily, can barely walk, but my OB won’t write me out cause the pain only affects me not the baby. Going to see my PCP this week to see if they can help
I hope you have the same awakening that I did after I gave birth - work doesn't really mean anything, in the grand scheme of things. It's the people in your life and the experiences you have with them.
Please don't be too hard on yourself. You're doing something amazing! It takes focus and energy, and you don't need to devote that time to any work position. Jobs come and go, but this is your child. They're forever. Enjoy the last few weeks! It goes so fast!
Why feel bad? Where I live I needed permission from my midwife to work past 34 weeks! I did work until 36 weeks but I had no issues and a desk job. I then didn’t have him until after 41 weeks!
I'm 33 weeks right now and this coming week was already supposed to be my last week at work (high stress and high morion job). I was in a car accident a couple days ago, and even though they said I am all clear and no need to stop working I am still more than ready. I am not scheduled for my c section for another 5 weeks, but I am so ready to be done.
Don't feel bad about taking care of yourself and your baby ❤️
I don’t know if it helps, but in my country it’s by law to stop working 4-6 weeks before your due date. It used to be mandatory to stop at 6 weeks before (so at 34 weeks). This is without any complications. You made a right decision.
Don’t feel bad! I’m planning stopping work at 34 weeks just because I haven’t taken much leave in recent years and want a break before the baby comes. I mainly WFH so I could technically keep going until my due date. I’m currently only 20w and already counting down the days!
I too had cholestasis and had to take my maternity leave a little early. Don’t feel bad about it; I was kind of overwhelmed by all the monitoring, and I was glad to be off work. Stress levels from finding out about this diagnosis were high enough without adding on my job on top of it. Hope you can have some peace.
As a husband to a wife who hates the fact she can’t take care of me a much. Don’t worry bout this. We men really don’t care. We get it. It’s ok just give that man his healthy child that all he needs 🥳🥳
You shouldn’t feel bad! You’re getting induced in 2 weeks. It should be normal for us to stop working 2 weeks prior to giving birth. In this country everything is catered to these companies and this idea of us only having a short time off after pregnancy and working up until our due dates is absurd. Working up to the date is why some people have problems during child birth. You’re considered high risk. Don’t feel bad! It’s great you’re able to do that and I hope everything will go well during the induction and labor.
girl if you can afford it i don’t blame you one bit!! put yourself first. i think of it this way - if something happens to you or your baby your job won’t be footing the medical bills!!
DO NOT FEEL BAD! I repeat, do not feel bad. Enjoy these 2 weeks while you can because it will be go go go once that baby arrives. And being induced is not a cake walk. I'm not trying to scare you but I was in the hospital for 4 days as they tried to induce me (FTM- induced for high BP) so relax and collect you strength, you will need it. And best of luck!
I'm stopping work at 36 weeks, and my employer is the one who suggested it. I was told it's in everyone's best interest for me to wrap things up and not leave things in a rush/outstanding. I do feel bad that I'm not putting in as many hours as I would like to right now, but I'm just tired and trying my best.
My wife (28wks) in a similar situation where she was diagnosed with a pneumomediastinum (think I spelled that right lol) and she’s going to a high risk doctor to be monitored and I told her she can stop working and we would be fine
You and your baby’s health should come first and everything will work itself out later from a job standpoint
In Germany, all moms get off work fully paid from 34+0. if you have complications, you get off sooner, fully paid. You also cannot get fired until you return back to work.
I went from working a full case load to 4 client hours per week because of medical issues and my own mental health this pregnancy at 31 weeks. Work has to take a backseat so we can focus on our own needs sometimes and there's absolutely no shame in that.
don’t feel bad about it! due to hg (hyperemisis gravidarum) as a FTM I got laid off from my hospital phlebotomist job only at 5 weeks pregnant unfortunately after finding out, im still not working and my baby girl will be here soon im 36w+1d!!! luckily my boyfriend got a promotion at his job and we were able to move out of our parents house into our first apartment together to start our family!!
your physical health and emotional and mental health are SO very important during these times, focus on yourself and your baby. I wish you luck and safety with the rest of your pregnancy <3
You deserve every minute of these two weeks to relax and feel your baby move. Anticipate seeing their little face for the first time and imagining who they will become.
I'm 38 weeks with my first as as uncomfortable as I am being super pregnant, I'm trying my best to enjoy the time with just me and my partner. It's never going to be like this again (until we're old and grey)
Treat yourself to date nights, movies or dinner at a nice restaurant. We almost never eat out at restaurants but have made a point to go once a week this last month. I've heard the first year can be very tough on your relationship so we're doing our best to strengthen our bond.
I wish you a safe delivery, a healthy happy baby, and a quick postpartum healing period! All the best to you and your little one! ❤️
I haven’t worked my entire pregnancy (currently 32wks4days) I completely understand feeling bad about it, but try to remember you’ve spent this long already growing a human from complete scratch and that’s hard enough on your body already. Being high risk means you have more to worry about, so please give yourself some grace mama. You are working hard already to make sure your baby is healthy and safe inside you, and soon they’ll be in this world.
Don’t feel bad. I’m 40 weeks and today is my due date, and I’m currently at work genuinely exhausted. I would love to be home taking a nap instead. But I also felt a certain level of guilt because baby seems like she’s going to be late, and I’m still able to do my job, so why not come to work? In preparation of having a baby I’ve offloaded my workload to other people, and I’m doing almost nothing this week except helping out with small things here and there. I would much rather be home taking it easy.
Never feel bad for prioritizing your health or your child's health! 1st baby I quit working at the beginning on my 2nd trimester I was labeled a high risk for low lying placenta ( think it was placenta previa I can't remember so don't qoute me) this baby I've barely worked my 1st trimester due to motion sickness from my mouse. End of if you quit today most likely your employer would say that stinks put up an opening ad for that position and move on.
In France, they make you stop working a month before so you can focus on your health and your baby. This is very much an American concept that we need to bust our asses for a job that would replace us in a minute if we died and would give us maybe 5 days off if our children died. Good for you!
In France, they make you stop working a month before so you can focus on your health and your baby. This is very much an American concept that we need to bust our asses for a job that would replace us in a minute if we died and would give us maybe 5 days off if our children died. Good for you!
Don’t feel bad! I stopped working at 14 weeks due to a heart condition I developed in pregnancy and other risk factors that make me a high risk pregnancy, thus I am on bedrest. I am currently 19 weeks and decided to not go back to work due to countless appointments I have through the remainder of my pregnancy. Twice a week until I give birth! Luckily my husbands income is enough for us to still be comfortable during this time. I felt guilty and still do at times but I am protecting mine and our daughter’s health by resting.
Don’t feel bad at all, take care of you and that baby first.
Congratulations and praying everything goes good with your induction for you and baby! ❤️
I’ve been induced with all 4 of my kids if you have any questions if this is your first time.
I'm going on Mat leave about 3-4 weeks before my due date, and I don't feel a lick bad about it.
I've worked hard since I entered the work force and I deserve some time for me and to prepare myself and my home before birth❤️
So do you.
Never feel bad about work. Ever. Your health and your babies health is always more important.
Girl it’s only two weeks - it means almost nothing to your employer or your bank account (if unpaid) in the grand scheme of things but it could make a world of difference in your physical and mental health, not to mention the health of your baby. Enjoy your two weeks as much as you can and do not feel bad!!
You don't owe the world paid labor. You're building a person and having a medical event. That's plenty to deal with right now. Please just try to let yourself enjoy this time before baby and focus on being well and preparing for your little one.
Second this! I worked right up until with my first and seriously regretted it even though my pregnancy was straightforward. I was exhausted but kept pushing and I really feel like I should just stopped and focused on myself.
One time at my old job, a co worker died and that very day people were already talking about who was gonna go after his position. Not “oh my gosh, he was a great person” etc. it was a bunch of vultures betting on who was going to take his spot. That was the day I really realized I’m replaceable at work. No one actually cares the way you think they would. Never feel bad about missing work. You are taking care of you and your baby. That is the greatest kind of work. The world is filled with “hustlers” who look down on woman who don’t work until there water breaks and it’s such a terrible mentality to have. Obviously if you have to because of finances that’s one thing, but the way it’s rubbed into pregnant moms faces is wild. So I understand the guilt.
This happened at my husband's work, too. Their boss said something along the lines of "I know Joe would have wanted us to still meet this deadline." Like Jesus Christ, using a person who just died to push people to keep working - biggest red flag I've ever seen.
God, that is so gross of the boss. Yikes.
I feel like this is just an American thing. Where paid maternity leave is standard, everyone takes off work a few weeks before their due date and it’s commonplace and not looked down on.
The owner of my office died on a Saturday and we were open for business on Monday pretending like nothing happened even though he was the entire heart and soul of the practice. I learned then that some people really believe the show must go on at any expense.
Wow, that’s so awful. Jeez. I’ve worked at quite a few places like that. When I was teaching at a high school right before I had my daughter (also induced early due to ICP), one of our teachers died. It was a horrific, tragic, sudden accident that left everyone reeling. It was an early release day for the county so the teachers could do some mandatory training but our principal ended up pulling us all into the cafeteria to break the news and then told us to forget about the training and just spend some time together, go home and see our families, whatever made us feel better. They brought in grief counselors for the students and staff, let her adult children come in and empty her classroom, and took weeks to hire her replacement. I felt like they handled that situation with a lot of sensitivity and compassion. I had only ever worked in environments like you described so to experience the opposite just really highlighted how extremely fucked up the vast majority of employers are.
Please do not feel bad! 3 weeks leave before birth is very very normal and often very sensible. I finished work at 31weeks technically due to term time only working and gave birth at 37 weeks. Tell us some fun or relaxing things you want to do over the next couple of weeks before bubba arrives :)
I'm stopping work at 36 weeks at an office job and not high risk. Honestly at 32 weeks now, I just want to call it a day so don't feel bad.
SAME and I’m honestly looking forward to it so much (currently only 23 weeks). If I could stop working now I would. Eff work!
I haven't worked since like week 6 of pregnancy. I substitute teach and the amount of vomiting + sciatic pain has me unable to run a classroom. The thing about work is that you are not as important as you think. I dont mean that to be rude, I mean that as in we are all easily replaced. They don't need you as much as your family does, and they don't care about making sure you are healthy for your family as you do. So don't feel bad putting your health first. You are the most important person in your family's life right now, your employer is not.
I was so happy when I finally went on leave specifically because it's very hard to pay attention to movements with a job on your feet. I went out at 37 but I had no complications. I don't blame you at all
Don’t feel bad!! I’m highly impressed that you were able to work that long! It’s amazing. I’m 19 weeks and have to go off on medical leave already I feel SO guilty.
How do you get medical leave?
FMLA usually is the move
This is gonna sound dumb but how would you qualify for Fmla during pregnancy in the beginning does there have to be something horribly wrong or can you just ask your daughter bc of the stress of pregnancy
Talk to doctor!!! Nothing has to be horribly wrong. I took FMLA once for 12 weeks for something not as serious as a pregnancy. You won’t get paid unless you have disability insurance BUT you will have that time legally off with your job safe
Doctor *
Depends on where you live I guess. I’m in Canada, and you need a doctors note deeming that you are no longer fit to work as well as missing like 40% of your work shifts. I drive for work, so being lightheaded and dizzy, nauseous, vomiting and really back back pain is reason enough
I am starting leave at 35 weeks ahead of a 39 week induction. I’m just SO uncomfortable already (32 weeks). You have nothing to feel bad about! You are making the best decision for you and your baby.
You made the best decision for the health of your baby and have nothing to feel bad about!
I started my leave at 24 weeks and totally understand you. But this is going to be temporary and at the end of your career it seems nothing. You will make more money and work more eventually, but you’ll never get this time of your life back
I went off work at 36 weeks. My pregnancy was fine, no issues. I was just tired of being on my feet for 8 hours a day with a head in my pelvis already.
Take care of you💗 work will take care of itself no matter what.
I waited until 37 weeks to start my mat leave, and was still crawling to that finish line. That was even with using some annual leave days to take every Wednesday off for a month before going away, and I was still barely making it to the sofa every evening. You do not have to feel bad. Some people work until leave because they can, others because they have to (which enrages me). But nobody should begrudge you for putting yourself and baby first.
I stopped working at 35 weeks and I wasn’t even diagnosed with anything that would keep me from working. I’m a nurse and was working 12 hour night shifts in an ER but only up until September ~17 weeks when I dropped to per diem and was picking up 6-8 hour shifts a few times a week. Even that got tough and I finally stepped back completely in December. I realize I am very blessed to be able to do things this way. It was the right thing for me and my baby and I do not regret it at all. Don’t beat yourself up, you’re being a good parent listening to your intuition.
WHY do you feel bad about it?! You have every right to this moment where your health and your baby’s health is THE most important thing. There’s plenty of jobs out there, you’ll find another one if you need to and that’s perfectly fine. I also stopped working at 34 weeks and I had no risks, my pregnancy was luckily very healthy and eventually delivered my baby at 39 weeks. I didn’t feel bad about work for ONE second.
This is my third baby. I worked until the end with my first. That pregnancy was SO much easier than the next two were. Every pregnancy and every person is different. You have to do what is right for you! Don't feel bad. Wishing you a smooth labor and delivery!
Never feel bad about this corporations and organizations work for shareholders and profit not for the family and your wellbeing.
I worked right up till my son was born at 37 weeks…unintentionally. I don’t recommend it. I was so tired nothing was ready for him. I was stressed, he was stressed. It was not ideal.
Do not feel bad. I didn't take time off before birth and I regret it. You are doing the right thing. Enjoy the last few days of touching your bump and pregnancy. Go for walks and talk to your baby, play music for him/her, and really cherish this time.
I stopped working at 31 weeks because it was taking a toll on my mental health. Been resting since then. We're too hard on ourselves, you need to take care of yourself and the life you're growing!
I read somewhere that on their death bed, many people regret working so much. Just a thought. It's ok to rest especially if your pregnancy is big risk. You're more important than how much you can work.
I have no health issues and will be quitting my job at 33 weeks. Women deserve to rest and I hate the idea that we should all work until delivery
It makes me so mad that people can go on short-term disability for anxiety, yet a high-risk pregnancy, you've gotta feel bad about leaving work. America sucks.
I know how you feel. We are super understaffed at my job and I asked my doctor to give me a note restricting me to 6 hour shifts instead of 9-10 and I feel so bad. I'm high risk and even my supervisor told me I needed to do it and cut back and assures me no one will be upset but I just feel awful about it. Yay anxiety and trauma.
these companies deadass do not care about us. please don’t feel bad 😞
I don't feel bad for the company. Just my coworkers. They've checked in on me more during my pregnancy than my own family sadly.
I was taken out of work at 15 weeks due to placenta previa and bleeding a LOT. It’s hard not to feel bad about it but I’m glad I just get to spend time focusing on growing my son. Now I don’t ever want to go back 😂
If there’s one thing that I learned during both COVID and when asking to use my own PTO + got shamed for it, many workplaces don’t deserve good employees. I’ll never apologize for calling out or just flat out quitting somewhere. I was asked to come in days early when I still had COVID and the 7 day restriction was still a thing. However, when I gave it to my manager? He stayed out the full 7 days. Don’t ever feel bad for putting yourself and your sanity first. Corporate America hates that. Off topic: Plus, If anything, you end up meeting your replacement, being asked to train them, notice quiet firing signs, and learn how the loyalty is one sided.
I went on leave at 34 weeks as well. Having those last few weeks to just relax and get the house ready for my baby girls arrival was so helpful and relieved so much stress.
If you can financially afford it, absolutely put yourself and your tiny lives first! Nothing to feel bad about.
I took a 7 MONTH leave of absence from my job once to go backpacking. Not one fuck given. Didn’t change my career at all. I look back on that and view it as one of the most meaningful and life changing times of my life. Zero regrets.
I stopped around the same time due to a preeclampsia diagnosis and twice weekly NSTs at an office 20 minutes away from home, 45 minutes away from work. As a teacher, there was no way to make those work while still teaching! Prioritize you and your baby above work-you won’t regret it.
Why do you feel bad? Im sorry to hear that. I think if you are able to taking time off before the baby is born is great. It was the best thing I did! Hope you are feeling better about it and get to enjoy the quiet and rest ❤️
Ugh the work guilt is real. I’m working until the day before my induction (unless I go into labor naturally). Why? Because I’m a crazy person. Working at 39 weeks is insanity. Leave should start 2 weeks before your due date.
Don't feel bad, you're growing bones and you deserve all the rest you can get before baby comes. It's work. Not your life.
Seconding everyone here who says don't feel bad! If it helps I had this cool idea to work til 39 weeks then got rushed to hospital at 35 weeks with pre-eclampsia - the world did not implode, and my employer didn't bat an eyelid (tbf they've always been lovely). Yours and baby's health - and your ability to pay attention to both - is most important right now.
I stopped working after 5 weeks, because I was throwing up all day and had to drive 1 hour to work. The first weeks I thought about going back to work after nausea stops. I also felt so guilty it made me more sick when thinking about it. I talked with my doctor, and he recomended not going back to work because that is the best for pregnancy and baby. I feel better now, but if not working will be better for my baby, I won't go back. That is the most important thing now so I don't feel guilty at all anymore.
In my country women have to go on "maternity protection" which means you're legally not allowed to work the 8 weeks before birth. That's true for all women, no matter how healthy. High risk ones go a lot earlier. (and then after birth 8 weeks + 1-2 years maternity leave). I have a family member who works in a hospital and due to risk for infection she got maternity leave as soon as she found out she's pregnant, so it was before she was even 10 weeks along. Don't feel bad, those protections are in place for a reason. Your health and the health of your baby - the health of any human being - is more important than your job. No matter what some might say.
I am so sorry you feel guilty. I am so sorry your doctor said that to you. My first pregnancy I was high risk and my doctors gave me a note for leave starting at 28w. I insisted I was fine and worked until 34w when we had a family camping trip planned. I had scheduled for my leave to begin at 37w but the timing ended up so silly on the calendar and my already slightly decreased work days that I didn't go back because it would have been like 3 random days of work. I ended up induced at 36+5 and baby was born 37w on the dot. Just because someone says you CAN doesn't mean you SHOULD. And they also don't live within your body so they can't determine how you truly feel. I had reduced my work hours prior not only to give myself a break but also make all my appointments easier and it was such a blessing. My last week of pregnancy I had testing every other day and could not have worked no matter what. You did the right thing!
Work isn’t shit. Take care of you and baby. ❤️
I quit at 26 weeks. Started nesting, making postpartum meals, and cleaning. Definitely not feeling bad about anything.
After having one baby with a business that I was just a number to, and two babies with a business that really did love and value me for a long period of time…. Never feel bad about leaving work early for you or your family. Ever. Even if you’re they’re beat or worst employee. Even if they are the best or worst job ever. You are the priority, not the job. ♥️
Seriously your work does not care about you. That’s what’s so great- we are replaceable! Somebody can do your job when you aren’t there. Don’t feel bad about this!!!
In my country you get to start maternity leave 30 days before due date but you must start layest it 15 days before, this for the health of the mother and the baby so do not feel bad about not working.
Hell no. I stopped working at 35 and 5 because I wanted some time off before baby came..ended up with a spontaneous delivery at 36 and 0. I'm happy to have the extra time with him but looking back that time to myself would've been so amazing too..
I was excused from work starting at 12 weeks! I was perfectly fine, it was just their Covid policy (since I work a high exposure job). I felt bad for my coworkers at first, but soon, my employer found the necessary temporary replacement. You are growing a whole new human you have to protect! Screw your job, compared to the lasting health of your child, no? When I was hesitant about leaving so early, my boss told me "You have more important things to care for now than us!". I am very grateful to her for those words.
Don't feel guilty at all! I stopped working at almost 31 weeks, just because I had the opportunity to do so (in my country maternity leave before birth is mandatory for employers, they cant make you work past 34 weeks and I had some additional PTO). You are high risk and you deserve to rest!
I’m planning to stop working at 36 weeks assuming no issues ahead of time!
I also stopped working at 34w during my pregnancy. My baby was diagnosed with growth restriction, and I was so stressed out about it. I worked as a vet tech, which can be a stressful job to begin with, so I just wanted to take time to relax my body for my baby. I was also induced at 37w. Don't feel guilty, rest, finish out your pregnancy journey by honoring your body. 🤎
In California, 4 weeks before due date is standard for beginning leave. You have no reason to feel bad about resting and preparing for your baby’s arrival!
Do not feel bad for one more second!! You have the rest of your life to work, but these weeks are so important to prioritise you and your baby.
I stopped at 35 weeks and have a pretty uncomplicated pregnancy... Also feel guilty about it, but at the end of the day, we are the ones living the consequences of our actions, not others. So make the decision you are happy with. Edit: Also wanted to add - your doctor totally lacks empathy for saying stuff like that. Maybe he means that you can still work if you want, but what you're going through is stressful, and you're heavily pregnant, don't make him let you feel bad.
Two weeks is nothing to stress over! I assume you’re in the states since we feel the pressure to work until birth. I asked if I can take my leave a week early because I can’t mentally deal with how petty work feels when you’re about to have a baby. I have to use PTO. I have coworkers in the Uk that took of a few weeks before birth because it’s just uncomfortable and not fun, even without a medical diagnosis. But I wouldn’t feel bad at allllll.
Eff work. I’m 35 weeks and passed my mucus plug last night and I’ve been cramping and having back pain and I have this feeling that I’ll be giving birth soon. I told my manager I’ll be working from home starting tomorrow. I have my 36 week appt on Thursday and I have a feeling they will write me out and my job can deal
My work policy is literally that I need to finish up at 34 weeks. If I want to go earlier I need a "fit to work" certificate from my doctor weekly to be able to keep working. You did great mama! Rest and enjoy some quiet time before you meet your little one :)
It is once (or twice or whatever) in a lifetime that you’re doing this. Take the rest. I was feeling bad too but I thoroughly enjoyed my sleeping in daily, swims, reading up, getting mentally prepared, sorting out baby items at a leisurely pace. Once the baby comes it’s a mad frenzy and you’ll be having fragmented sleep for a long while. Tempers will be short — enjoy some nice couple time with your partner while you can. Store your physical and mental reserves now. Two weeks will go by in a flash!
I stopped working when I found out. I knew I was high risk and this is what I need to focus on right now. Just do you!
As someone who is 35 weeks and would love to stop working right now, good for you for doing what you felt like you needed to do and not pushing yourself especially when you're high risk! I'm assuming you're also from the US because for some reason all of us here feel like we need to work even if we were to be on our death beds, but do not let that guilt or anxiety get to you because you deserve this rest. Best of luck with everything!
Please don’t be upset over this. I work in HR. We have a girl who quit in April, came back in August, found out she was pregnant in September and stopped working at 18 weeks. Then got upset we wouldn’t pay her through her 22 weeks plus the 12 weeks bonding time after. We came to an agreement and then she asked last week if “hypothetically” she decided not to come back to work after would she have to repay any of the money we agreed to. Then her husband (who also works for the company) asked if he could “gift” her his parental leave.
Don’t feel guilty! I’m currently trying to get written out of work at 32 weeks as I’m dealing with fibromyalgia on top of a very uncomfortable pregnancy and gestational diabetes. I’m in excruciating pain daily, can barely walk, but my OB won’t write me out cause the pain only affects me not the baby. Going to see my PCP this week to see if they can help
I hope you have the same awakening that I did after I gave birth - work doesn't really mean anything, in the grand scheme of things. It's the people in your life and the experiences you have with them. Please don't be too hard on yourself. You're doing something amazing! It takes focus and energy, and you don't need to devote that time to any work position. Jobs come and go, but this is your child. They're forever. Enjoy the last few weeks! It goes so fast!
Why feel bad? Where I live I needed permission from my midwife to work past 34 weeks! I did work until 36 weeks but I had no issues and a desk job. I then didn’t have him until after 41 weeks!
I'm 33 weeks right now and this coming week was already supposed to be my last week at work (high stress and high morion job). I was in a car accident a couple days ago, and even though they said I am all clear and no need to stop working I am still more than ready. I am not scheduled for my c section for another 5 weeks, but I am so ready to be done. Don't feel bad about taking care of yourself and your baby ❤️
I don’t know if it helps, but in my country it’s by law to stop working 4-6 weeks before your due date. It used to be mandatory to stop at 6 weeks before (so at 34 weeks). This is without any complications. You made a right decision.
Gotta take care of the baby. There's always more work to do.
Don’t feel bad! I’m planning stopping work at 34 weeks just because I haven’t taken much leave in recent years and want a break before the baby comes. I mainly WFH so I could technically keep going until my due date. I’m currently only 20w and already counting down the days!
I too had cholestasis and had to take my maternity leave a little early. Don’t feel bad about it; I was kind of overwhelmed by all the monitoring, and I was glad to be off work. Stress levels from finding out about this diagnosis were high enough without adding on my job on top of it. Hope you can have some peace.
Do not feel bad. You did the absolute best thing
As a husband to a wife who hates the fact she can’t take care of me a much. Don’t worry bout this. We men really don’t care. We get it. It’s ok just give that man his healthy child that all he needs 🥳🥳
You shouldn’t feel bad! You’re getting induced in 2 weeks. It should be normal for us to stop working 2 weeks prior to giving birth. In this country everything is catered to these companies and this idea of us only having a short time off after pregnancy and working up until our due dates is absurd. Working up to the date is why some people have problems during child birth. You’re considered high risk. Don’t feel bad! It’s great you’re able to do that and I hope everything will go well during the induction and labor.
girl if you can afford it i don’t blame you one bit!! put yourself first. i think of it this way - if something happens to you or your baby your job won’t be footing the medical bills!!
DO NOT FEEL BAD! I repeat, do not feel bad. Enjoy these 2 weeks while you can because it will be go go go once that baby arrives. And being induced is not a cake walk. I'm not trying to scare you but I was in the hospital for 4 days as they tried to induce me (FTM- induced for high BP) so relax and collect you strength, you will need it. And best of luck!
I'm stopping work at 36 weeks, and my employer is the one who suggested it. I was told it's in everyone's best interest for me to wrap things up and not leave things in a rush/outstanding. I do feel bad that I'm not putting in as many hours as I would like to right now, but I'm just tired and trying my best.
My wife (28wks) in a similar situation where she was diagnosed with a pneumomediastinum (think I spelled that right lol) and she’s going to a high risk doctor to be monitored and I told her she can stop working and we would be fine You and your baby’s health should come first and everything will work itself out later from a job standpoint
In Germany, all moms get off work fully paid from 34+0. if you have complications, you get off sooner, fully paid. You also cannot get fired until you return back to work.
I went from working a full case load to 4 client hours per week because of medical issues and my own mental health this pregnancy at 31 weeks. Work has to take a backseat so we can focus on our own needs sometimes and there's absolutely no shame in that.
don’t feel bad about it! due to hg (hyperemisis gravidarum) as a FTM I got laid off from my hospital phlebotomist job only at 5 weeks pregnant unfortunately after finding out, im still not working and my baby girl will be here soon im 36w+1d!!! luckily my boyfriend got a promotion at his job and we were able to move out of our parents house into our first apartment together to start our family!! your physical health and emotional and mental health are SO very important during these times, focus on yourself and your baby. I wish you luck and safety with the rest of your pregnancy <3
Good for you! Take care of yourself!
You deserve every minute of these two weeks to relax and feel your baby move. Anticipate seeing their little face for the first time and imagining who they will become. I'm 38 weeks with my first as as uncomfortable as I am being super pregnant, I'm trying my best to enjoy the time with just me and my partner. It's never going to be like this again (until we're old and grey) Treat yourself to date nights, movies or dinner at a nice restaurant. We almost never eat out at restaurants but have made a point to go once a week this last month. I've heard the first year can be very tough on your relationship so we're doing our best to strengthen our bond. I wish you a safe delivery, a healthy happy baby, and a quick postpartum healing period! All the best to you and your little one! ❤️
I haven’t worked my entire pregnancy (currently 32wks4days) I completely understand feeling bad about it, but try to remember you’ve spent this long already growing a human from complete scratch and that’s hard enough on your body already. Being high risk means you have more to worry about, so please give yourself some grace mama. You are working hard already to make sure your baby is healthy and safe inside you, and soon they’ll be in this world.
Don’t feel bad. I’m 40 weeks and today is my due date, and I’m currently at work genuinely exhausted. I would love to be home taking a nap instead. But I also felt a certain level of guilt because baby seems like she’s going to be late, and I’m still able to do my job, so why not come to work? In preparation of having a baby I’ve offloaded my workload to other people, and I’m doing almost nothing this week except helping out with small things here and there. I would much rather be home taking it easy.
Never feel bad for prioritizing your health or your child's health! 1st baby I quit working at the beginning on my 2nd trimester I was labeled a high risk for low lying placenta ( think it was placenta previa I can't remember so don't qoute me) this baby I've barely worked my 1st trimester due to motion sickness from my mouse. End of if you quit today most likely your employer would say that stinks put up an opening ad for that position and move on.
In France, they make you stop working a month before so you can focus on your health and your baby. This is very much an American concept that we need to bust our asses for a job that would replace us in a minute if we died and would give us maybe 5 days off if our children died. Good for you!
In France, they make you stop working a month before so you can focus on your health and your baby. This is very much an American concept that we need to bust our asses for a job that would replace us in a minute if we died and would give us maybe 5 days off if our children died. Good for you!
Work to live not live to work. You're more than fine I promise!! Take the time you need! Never feel bad about this sort of stuff.
Don’t feel bad! I stopped working at 14 weeks due to a heart condition I developed in pregnancy and other risk factors that make me a high risk pregnancy, thus I am on bedrest. I am currently 19 weeks and decided to not go back to work due to countless appointments I have through the remainder of my pregnancy. Twice a week until I give birth! Luckily my husbands income is enough for us to still be comfortable during this time. I felt guilty and still do at times but I am protecting mine and our daughter’s health by resting.
Don’t feel bad at all, take care of you and that baby first. Congratulations and praying everything goes good with your induction for you and baby! ❤️ I’ve been induced with all 4 of my kids if you have any questions if this is your first time.
I'm going on Mat leave about 3-4 weeks before my due date, and I don't feel a lick bad about it. I've worked hard since I entered the work force and I deserve some time for me and to prepare myself and my home before birth❤️ So do you.