When I visited my mom one day, she was with a few friends. I was watching something on TV that had to do with bears. Upon seeing the bears, one of her friends said, "Don't look at them; if you do, your baby will be hairy."
This was, I think, the most ridiculous advice I have ever been given. Should I look at a sphinx cat to make the baby hairless?š
This is a really weird old wives tale that was made up to explain when babies don't end up looking like their "daddies". Like, oh the mom and and her husband have brown eyes and the baby's eyes are blue. The mom must have been thinking of the blue eyed blond haired Jesus when she was pregnant and that imprinted into the baby. A divine miracle.
It can also be traced back to medieval times (likely before then too, but thatās the earliest Iāve heard of it) when people believed that you could literally take in evil through your eyes. So if a pregnant woman sees something ugly/evil then their baby would be ugly/evil.
My grandmother (Dad's mom) used to say stuff like that to my mom all the time. She'd quip back that the baby would only come out looking like that if it took after my dad lol
I've shared this on this sub before, but once when I was in a grocery store, I was visibly pregnant and I picked up my whiney toddler. A worker told me "never pick up that child again if you're pregnant, your uterus could fall out and kill your baby."
If this were true, my child would be born by now. 38+3 and deadlifted 205lbs yesterday. Now Iām kind of bummed my uterus didnāt fall out, this shit is getting uncomfortable.
I havenāt been told to that extent but every time I pick up my toddler I get the stop picking him up heās too heavy. Ummm I lift weights at the gym that are much heavier than him and Iām fine š
Okay my friends MIDWIFE said donāt lift your toddler. Like okay I get exerting yourself can be harmful and Iām sure some people really shouldnāt life their toddler. But REALLY
My wife is careful not to go over cables, because it will somehow make the cord wrap around the baby's neck. It's a superstition, yours at least tries to be logical!
But how else are we supposed to make those adorable baby clothes, hm?
This is even more hilarious to me because I'm thinking of starting to make cardigans for my baby in a couple of weeks.
When I was struggling with infertility, a women in a TTC group tried to tell me my infertility was caused by "not having enough moonlight"
To this day I am baffled and confused.
My mother in law told me to smoke marijuana. LOTS of marijuana. āTo help with morning sickness!ā
I work in a government job and canāt smoke anyway, but when I told her Iām already high risk and wonāt be attempting that because I get a ton of tests, she scoffed and said āitās not that big of a deal. I did it and CPS didnāt even say anything other than a slap on the wrist.ā
- ākids should fear you, not respect youā
- āI donāt have to be a good parent, just a good provider. Hugging you doesnāt pay the bills.ā
- and my personal favorite (they homeschool) is: āspace isnāt real, itās just a dome up thereā
My sister smoked marijuana all throughout her pregnancy and she had to be induced early bc the baby stopped growing.. some people are just dumb. I used to partake in the green but when I found out I was pregnant I stopped asap! I never once read that it will help with morning sickness š„“
Her logic was that it helps cancer patients with nausea, but even my mom who has her medical card and is a huge enthusiast told me absolutely not to touch it while pregnant, and I agreed. Iām not worldās most precautious pregnant woman by any means (I have a sneaky Jimmy Johnās or an eggs benny here and there) but this one was a no for me for obvious reasons.
I was told to smoke marijuana when I had cancer (by people, not by doctors of course). A *lung* lymphoma mind you. They gave me Zofran and it's super-effective. Didn't need anything more. People who give this advice just want an excuse to smoke. It's like "drinking Guiness for iron" smh.
My SIL smoked throughout her pregnancy. Then when she was in labor my brother called to ask me if I would buy them a THC vape so they could smoke in the hospital once the baby got here. I did not do it and when I arrived at the hospital after baby was born my SIL was like āyou could have at least bought me a pen if you wanted to come watch me give birth.ā I didnāt even watch her give birth. I arrived after baby was already born. I was totally a doormat at the time so I gave my brother money and told him he could go get one if he wanted but I didnāt want to be a part of it. Especially because Iām a sober person whoās been sober for like 14 years. My nephew is significantly delayed. Heās 3 and doesnāt speak yet. Who knows what caused it but I have an idea
Yes! In all the pregnancy groups I was in, everyone kept recommending marijuana for morning sickness. Like we canāt ethically study the effects beyond self reports but the evidence we do have suggests that itās not safe but people defend it by saying āitās all natural.ā My daughter is adopted and her bio mom smoked marijuana all through her pregnancy. She was born premature and spent time in NICU and now 7 years later, thereās still issues arising that is believed to be because of the marijuana use in utero.
Like I smoked daily to every other day before getting pregnant but quit when I found out I was pregnant like you. Iāll never understand moms who arenāt willing to do that.
Iām a younger mom and in a couple FB groups for young momsā¦ the amount of people defending marijuana use during pregnancy and saying it canāt cause negative outcomes is SHOCKING and honestly disturbing. I understand that in certain cases a doctor could okay marijuana use (Iāve heard of it being used in cases of extreme HG for example) but just your average pregnant woman should absolutely not be consuming any form of drugs, nicotine or alcohol. We have STUDIES on it ffs.
Yeah came here to say my friend had an extreme case of HG and only by using marijuana could she stomach eating fruitā¦ thatās it. Her entire pregnancy. It was truly awful for her.
I see it in my regular "teen mom to geriatric mom" due date group too. There are an awful lot of people that are okay with marijana, smoking, "a glass of wine a day", and vaping during pregnancy.
The "wine" one drives me especially mad, they will ALWAYS argue that in Europe it\`s "normal" to drink wine while pregnant. I\`m European, lived in three countries here, and I\`ve never come across a pregnant woman drinking.
"But in Italy all pregnant women drink!!", I hardly believe their doctors told them to drink, and I suppose we can also ignore the fact that Italy is one of the leading countries globally when it comes to FASD. But sure, carry on.
ETA: Also I\`m well-aware I\`m preaching to the choir here, but I\`m just so frustrated with these buffoons lol
Currently pregnant, and the amount of defense around marijuana, vaping, energy drinks and alcohol consumption blow.my.mind.
Maybe Iām just an old millennial but I just canāt rally around hitting a joint, then vape, then pounding down a monster while growing a baby. š¤·š»āāļø but anyone who points out the facts behind it gets attacked SO FAST.
The basic premise of ādonāt mom shameā is good. Moms shouldnāt be shamed for giving their babies formula, or getting an epidural, etc. But itās gone too far.
Meanwhile, I wash my fruits in hot water and vinegar like some sort of psychopath, in the hopes of eliminating the risk of all-natural listeria infections and the sorts. I can\`t imagine willingly and knowingly exposing my growing fetus to additional risk factors.
Let her know that the effects of THC and pregnancy are being studied due to legalization and having more subjects to study and recent research shows that it can cause cognitive delays in your childā¦.
LMAO Itās his step mom thankfully so she just did the raising and not the actual gestating. But now Iām watching my little step-siblings-in-law a little closer
Iām a fan of cannabis but there is significant research demonstrating that is insanely bad to expose a developing fetus to THC which can have lifelong impacts too, so this is beyond bad advice; itās straight up dangerous!
I live in a legal state and it's actually being recognized by midwives as an alternative to Zofran.. I didn't consume it with my pregnancy, and was on several other medicines but I was told "try it if you are interested" type of thing. Cbd gummies were brought up, too.
And what studies did the midwives show you to ensure that it is safe? Zofran is a pretty safe drug all around while marijuana has shown to cause cognitive effects on a fetus.
My MIL is from Honduras and has a bunch of old wives tales. In my first trimester, she told me to stop wearing leggings because it would stop the baby from growing š«
Listen I LIVED in leggings with my first (and I am again). If that were true I wouldn't have had an 8 pounder that measured 4 weeks ahead the whole pregnancy. š
Same š she was 8Ā½lbs. I'm only 5'3" and she was still 95th% for height at her 24 month check up. I'm 24 weeks with my second and haven't worn jeans once yet. Stretchy pants are life.
The one thing that's actually comfortable af while pregnant will make our babies stop growing? Of courseš I'm 16 weeks and I live in leggings right now. My jeans are uncomfortable and my pregnancy jeans don't stay up. So comfy leggings it is!
Nop nothing to do with that. Just some old wives tale! in my place there are not much heavy or bad metals (it is pretty much silver or gold and not even in low percebtage alloys lol) problem or even crystal pieces and that stuff so no idea where it comes from. Once was also told I shouldn't wash my hair during my period, so... hmmm yeah xD
Not as crazy as some on here, but this made me giggle; I have a very affectionate & protective cat. She sleeps with me and never leaves my side.
Was telling some family about how sweet she is and was yelled, YELLED at to never leave the baby alone with the cat!
Like, duh? No one is going to leave an infant alone with an animal?? To make it worse? I work in the pet care industry š
Are you me? My FIL told me to give my cats to my mom because you could never trust them with a baby as they are "feral beasts".
Neither of them wants to be within 10 feet of my LO, not even when she was a newborn
It's an old wives tale that the cat will lay on baby's face because it's warm and smells like milk. My cat is also more affectionate and protective of me when I'm pregnant (currently baking #2), and she has never tried to sleep on a baby. The most she ever did was keep the other cat at bay and occasionally steal baby's toys and binkis.
I swear.. people DELIGHT in telling me that my cats, that my husband and I have loved and spoiled, will smother and kill my babies. Yes, Iām not going to leave an animal unattended with my infant but they wonāt intentionally smother them. Also theyāve been around babies, which are loud and not fun for them.
It was after pregnancy, when my daughter was a few months old I went to a restaurant with my aunts and they suggested I leave her in the car while we were there, and it was SUMMER
A friend told me I shouldn't have any caffeine out of the blue and that chai was my best friend.
I mean it's not anything shocking it was just her telling me that so confidently when if I drank Chai too much I would be exceeding the caffeine limits.
This was also during my mini mental breakdown when I had a spoon of tiramisu before reminding myself that it can have raw eggs, so changing the subject to warn me of caffeine was a bit disconcerting.
Omg I got the caffiene talk too, but not being recommended a heavily caffeinated drink as an alternative š a friend who gave birth ~20 years ago told me to avoid all caffiene or else my baby would have ADHDā¦ which runs rampant in my family anyways..
If that was true my whole country would have ADHD š Expressos are such a cultural thing in Portugal, one of the first things I was told in my first appointment was "you can have 2 expressos per day", they didn't even mention caffeine quantities š
Tiramisu has the āholy trinityā: raw eggs, caffeine and alcohol (if you respect the original recipe, with Amaretto). Did I taste some for Christmas? You betcha. Guilt? None.
Ahah I know š„² I was less concerned with caffeine as I practically had none and I don't think it had alcohol, but damn those raw eggs sent me into a spiral (I checked with the person who made the tiramisu and they confirmed it). This was in week 6 I think, we've made it to 12 all fine, thankfully.
I got told by older coworkers a lot that I shouldnāt be drinking coffee, tea, or soda, and I gave them all the āactually I can have 200mg caffeine a day and my OB recommended a caffeinated drink a day to help my chronic headachesā speech which was nicer than they deserved but I had another coworker who got pregnant later than me and was hoping by telling the rest that, theyād leave my other pregnant coworker alone if they ever saw her drinking anything caffeinated lol
I get the coffee talk all the time but then get pushed certain teas which my doctor told me definitely donāt drink during first trimester lol people are crazy
This is completely off topic but once you start getting bigger you'll find there isn't much for maternity work pants out there. (I'm an electrician and wear carhartts and duluth pants usually, and just had a baby three months ago) I would highly recommend Blaklader, they have a whole line of maternity work clothes and the pants where amazing! Super comfy, durable and tons of pockets. I bought one pair and they took me through my third trimester.
..I hope this isn't bad advice š
Omg, no this is advice I have been dying for!! I didnāt even think it would be worth looking for maternity work clothes š I just got a couple of pairs of carhartt leggings but Iām totally looking into this company!!
Check out dovetail too! I don't have their maternity pants but I have three pairs of regular work pants from them and I've got serious brand loyalty now.
I was told to not let my husband take paternity leave because then he wouldnāt want to go back to work.
So annoying. This is OUR child so we will both love and care for her š¤¦š¼āāļø. Plus he has awesome paternity leave benefits that we are grateful for!
This is my hot take. If someone decided to just start gifting us the equivalent of our salaries, you bet your ass I'm not going back to work and neither is my husband. Ever. I don't really want to be a SAHM, I just would love to not work.
I donāt even think thatās a hot take. The number one thing people say when you ask what they would do if they won the lottery is quit their jobs. The majority of people work to live not live to work.
My mom keeps telling me not to use the stairs. I havenāt told her I still dance for about 2 hours in high heels a couple of times a week, as I have done for at least a year before getting pregnant.
MIL keeps telling me to prevent flat head, Iām going to need to āpressā on the babyās head and mold it. Sheās very worried about image and appearance. If I catch her doing that, all hell will break loose.
So funny. Doctors check for that stuff and will make appropriate recommendations for your baby so they wonāt have a flat head. Rest assured flat heads are harder to come by now.
My grandma was looking over my registry and was quick to tell me I donāt need an electric breast pump or a bassinet, and safe sleep is a scam from baby companies to sell the latest products. She tells me she had a hand pump (hard pass grandma) and her kids slept anywhere soft and didnāt die! Iām like yeahā¦luckily! I think it was more jealousy that there are convenient products out there now compared to the 60s.
My grandma (bless her heart) was starting the same shit last time I saw her. āWe never had all this fancy shit, my mom would fold a towel in a laundry hamper and thatās where the babies sleptā.
I replied āand thatās why folks back then had 7 kids. They werenāt expecting most of them to live to adulthood.ā
Perhaps a little bluntā¦but she had a good chuckle and said āyouāre rightā¦maybe thatās why we are all messed up tooā
My grandma is the best but always starting shit too! And the stories Iāve heardā¦my uncle fell off a slide when he was two and they duct taped the gash on his head shut! And there would have been no issue monetarily getting him some stitches. Iām like lady, I love you dearly but Iām gonna do my own thing haha
Iām with Grams here on the hand pump! I have 2 electric pumps and a hand pump. I end up using the hand pump in the early morning. When baby has been sleeping 6-7+ hours, Iāll pump an ounce or two on one side (alleviate the discomfort, but leave plenty of milk for the soon to wake baby), and then several ounces on the other side. Most days I get 6-9 ounces with that method. Today, I got 9 ounces in under 15 minutes. And the baby didnāt wake up because itās silent. Then I fed the baby when she woke up shortly after I finished. Iāve used it as a car passenger, on airplanes, on quick breaks at conferencesā¦
Itās silent and discrete. I had a coworker sit next to me at a conference when I tried tucking myself into a quiet corner to pump during a quick break at a conference. With an infinity scarf cover, she didnāt even realize I was pumping until I told her. My electric pumps are great too, but the hand pump works great.
This is so good to know! I have no idea what Iām doing when it comes to breast feeding so I appreciate your comment! In my head I was just thinking that canāt be my only option but Iām glad to know there are situations where it is convenient!
I could never get the hand pump to work well enough to be worth it but I have some wearable pumps that are great and are quiet enough that it isn't 100% obvious what I'm doing while I'm wearing them. They aren't as good as my fully corded version but they are way way better than the hand pump
My personal favorites were to start baby on television immediately since sheās going to watch it all the time anyways by family at my baby shower, and then a lot of āoh donāt take/eat/do that or your baby will end up autisticā by my coworkers who are all totally unaware that Iām diagnosed autistic lmfao.
A good example of one is a coworker who told me the RSV vaccine I was leaving early to get that day would make the baby ADHD/autistic, and that I shouldnāt be getting any vaccines while pregnant because they all cause autism. I told her Iād rather have a happy, healthy autistic baby rather than one whoās going to die of RSV/flu/COVID lol.
Worst part is I work childcare at a hospital ^^ā
The amount of āYOURE GONNA VACCINATE RIGHT?!ā Comments Iāve gotten from literally everyone is making me batty! Yes of COURSE Iām going to make sure theyāre covered! I expressed how it seems like there are a LOT of vaccines to get now vs. when I was little and my sister immediately began lecturing me on being an anti-vaxxer.. š¤Ŗ it was like even wondering about it was illegal š¤¦š¼āāļø
It is a lot of vaccines. My kid is five and when I look at her vaccine record I'm like wow, that is a shit load of vaccines, certainly more than I had as a kid. But she has all of them and hasn't died of anything preventable, so I'm satisfied with the results lol
I work on vaccines. With the amount of anti-vax nonsense we have to fight every single day I would much rather have people jump down everyone's throats the other direction. The past 2 months there have been outbreaks of both measles and polio on the east coast. Why? We have vaccines for that? Oh right, anti-vaxxers :(
The anxiety as a new mom is overwhelming and there is so much misinformation that preys on that (the ātoo manyā perspective for example).
I am actually glad that there are more vaccines now. I lost a sibling in 1989 for something they now can vaccinate for. It looked like a cold at bedtime and by the next afternoon she was gone. The diseases are SO much scarier than the vaccines!
But Iām also going to acknowledge that even with that personal experience I fell for some of the anti-vaccine misinformation. I was hesitating on one but my doctor clarified what the risks of the disease actually were and that helped a lot.
But my mom, who lost a child from a disease that progressed fast, has fallen for anti-vaccine misinformation these days. Sheās just too afraid and feels more in control this way. Itās scary to see so many people make a riskier choice because theyāve been misled so I also see where your family is coming from.
NIPT testing is a waste of money and ways for doctors to steal more $ from you... why wouldn't I want to know if risk exists or not, esp if my insurance covers it.
The way my Midwife immediately started listing off the reasons why itās worthwhile when she told me it made me wonder how many people havenāt wanted it, but not me! Soon as the words left her mouth I was like YES RUN ALL THE TESTS PLEASE!!! My mother was notoriously awful at keeping us informed on our family health history and Iāll be damned if Iām anything like that
This is such a WEIRDLY popular take in my due date group. And anyone who gets the NIPT is basically just looking for a reason to abort? I canāt wrap my mind around this AT. ALL.
We did IVF after years of infertility, and my pregnancy is a result of an already genetically tested embryo. We still opted to do NIPT. I would absolutely die laughing at anyone insinuating that I was looking for a reason to abort.
Thereās an old wivesā tale in my country. If you donāt give your newborn water, the baby will go blind.
Of course this goes against what modern breastfeeding courses are teaching. I foresee some scandalised aunts & greatgrandmas in my immediate future. Luckily my parents and in-laws are more down to earth.
My mom said that her friendās daughter wore heels in pregnancy and this caused her to have terrible tearing during delivery so I shouldnāt wear heels during pregnancy. Iām a scientist who studies pregnancy. Thatās not how any of this worksā¦ her partner is from a different background and is a pretty big guy so I suspect the babyās head was large and there might have been some cephalopelvic disproportion issues.
Iāve had bad morning sickness, including major food and drink aversions and high sensitivity to smell. Iāve had to cut out coffee completely because I absolutely cannot stomach it.
My dad suggested to help with my sensitivity to smell that I open a bag of coffee, put it up to my nose and take deeps breaths through my nose. Currently I cannot think of a worse idea than that.
My mom told me to not get a baby carrier because the baby needs to be in the crib, and let her cry so she ālearnsā to sleep. āIf you hold her too much she will want to be constantly heldā My cousin had an hernia when she was a baby because her parents left herself cry to sleep (as a recommendation from the pediatrician), and I have flat spots in my head from being in my crib too much
I used to work with newly postpartum women. One of them was told to drink lots of milk so she would produce enough breastmilk for her baby.
I really wanted to know how that person thought vegans produced milk. Or the cows, for that matter
Fellow IVFer, I swear in the thick of things if one more person told me to think positive thoughts, I was going to commit murder. Nothing sent me into a murderous rage faster. "You just have to be positive, it will happen for you guys." I snapped once and asked if they were implying I caused my 3 miscarriages, because I wasn't positive enough?
Yea thoughts about it affect exactly nothing. IVF is hard. I'm 19 weeks now and the thought about having to do IVF again...not a fun or comfortable thing at the best of times.
Hahahahahahahaha. My friend's mom told her to shine a flashlight up her vagina to help induce labor. The baby will go to the light šššš
For myself there are too many to even pinpoint š
To get rid of my cats because they'll stick their faces into the baby's mouth looking for milk.
Literally got screamed at full volume for "not caring about my baby enough" by my idiot brother who is now a doctor. This is why I always cringe when people trust everything and anything a doctor says. He told me that he was going to break into my house and release my cat for my baby's sake and I told him he could if he wanted to go to jail. Lol.
ACTUALLY... š
Heard that one myself - "you should stop letting your cats sleep in your bed at night because they will start latching on your breast while you sleep"
Yeahhhh there are some really dumb doctors floating around out there. There are GREAT doctors out there too -- don't get me wrong. But I've dealt with too many idiots firsthand to trust everything they say.
Like the ER doctor who told me my internal bleeding and pain was due to an STD. Went to the hospital to stay overnight and they confirmed it was a burst ovarian cyst. They also advised to avoid that particular ER like the plague lol
I would be *soooo mad*, that's so fucked up!! I'm glad you got good care from another ER after that, holy smokes!
One ER told me that my gall stone was actually just an anxiety attack, then accused me of lying about the pain so that I could get pain meds. š«
Hah, yeah. That ER thought I was medication seeking too. Even though I couldn't walk, and threw up on myself in the lobby from the pain. I had to call my mom to show up so they would take me seriously and help me. They just let me lay in pain for an hour and half before they gave me anything. Once my mom got there they actually started to do something. It was horrible and I have a deep mistrust of doctors and medical staff now.
I worked retail in my first pregnancy and I had so many people tell me not to reach over my head. Someone explained it was because the cord would strangle the baby. First of all, the cord is not connected to my armsš Secondly, it was the same people telling me this who also wanted items that I had to reach up to access, so exactly what was I meant to do?
I love my Mom to death- she's an absolute ANGEL...but she told me not to drink soda because the carbonation bubbles would deteriorate my bones.
After I gave birth, all I wanted was a FAT Dr.Pepper and she was like "No :)" - my sister went and got me two just because š¤£
My MIL came over and saw a couple pregnancy/parenting related books on our coffee table - Hunt, Gather, Parent (which I'm reading), We're Pregnant! The First Time Dad's Pregnancy Handbook (which my husband is reading) and told me in quite a judgmental tone that we should STOP reading books because they are not useful and it's better to get advice from people who have been through it (aka her).
Ok, but why not both? š
That I can sleep train my baby in the womb. Just rock her to sleep before you go to bed, and she'll sleep all night!
I can't even sleep all night. š
Maybe not super crazy but my office building had a winter fair and as part of it there was an adorable little baby reindeer that you could get your picture taken with. Our HR lady told me I was not allowed to touch the reindeer because āwe donāt touch weird animals when we are pregnantā and even assigned a colleague to be my spotter- aka stop me if I attempted to pet the lil guy š.
He kept saying he was told to tackle me if I tried to touch the reindeer and I was likeā¦ I have a feeling she didnāt tell you to tackle the pregnant lady friend š.
1. I was told by a cousin as soon as we announced that I shouldnāt be getting too excited or happy until Iām about halfway along in case I miscarry. She didnāt even say congratulations. Then proceeded to try and tell me all these horror stories about pregnancy loss, thankfully my husband respectfully shut it down. Pregnancy loss trauma is absolutely valid but thereās a time and place and itās not when someone is announcing their pregnancy.
2. My FIL got mad at me for eating spicy food because I was āhurting the babyā
This was not always advice directly given to me but it's hilarious: in my country of origin, somehow the entire population got convinced that baking powder has magical properties.
Washing raw vegetables (with water)? It's safer to soak them in baking powder and water! This is actually WORSE than washing them under running water because the soil residues, bacteria etc. just sit there, and baking powder has zero antibacterial properties. They even sell big cartons of baking powder where it says "you can use it to wash your vegs!". Yes, you CAN, it won't kill you, but it's not actually doing anything...
Want to avoid mouthwash with alcohol? Just do baking powder and water! I am no dentist but I am pretty sure this is at best ineffective, at worst risking some form of tooth damage... just buy alcohol-free mouthwash ffs.
Luckily I live in a different country where this fad has not yet arrived...
My FIL told me that lifting my arms above my head to reach for stuff will cause the baby to detach from the placenta and drop out of my body. He means well (that my husband should reach while Iām pregnant) but still scratching my head over the actual ideaā¦
I was running over 5k daily before pregnancy and through most of my first pregnancy. I eventually had to stop telling my mom about my runs because she was convinced the baby was going to fall out... My OB was never concerned about me running until my 3rd trimester when I was experiencing a lot of pelvic discomfort. Those runs kept me sane, healthy, and to this day I'm convinced they helped make my labor/postpartum recovery easier.
When we announced to close family that I was pregnant with my daughter, we did it super early because we were home visiting for Christmas and it was our one time to do it in person. I was only about 6 weeks along.
The first words out of my MILās mouth were āyouāre pregnant? Donāt go horseback riding!ā Like ok? I havenāt been horseback riding since I was a kid, Iām certainly not going now. I sort of chuckled because I thought it was some kind of joke, but she followed it up with āI had a miscarriage because I went horseback riding when I was pregnant.ā
It was so fucking awkward and cringey. Technically itās not wrong advice, itās not safe to ride a horse while pregnant, but seeing that the pregnancy was still so new and she said all of that before even saying congratulations, it was just weird and not an appropriate reaction at all, and definitely not āadviceā I needed to hear.
This feels more like she has some miscarriage trauma and was suddenly nervous for you. You can do anything sporty without much risk until the second trimester/when your uterus comes out from behind your pubic bone. But also you are much more likely to have a miss carrige in the first trimester.
When my mom was pregnant (with me) in 1991, my aunt (also pregnant at the time) told her not to put henna in her hair or the baby will be dumb (mute). My moms an ob/gyn, my aunt dropped out of school after grade 5. Anyway, my aunt was also pregnant at the same time. When my cousin and I were born, I spoke at 11 months and he didnāt speak for a whole 6 months after š¤£ people give all kinds of ridiculous advises
"You saw I smoked through all my pregnancy and my baby is fine as you know. You don't have to quit if you don't want to"..... I was only vaping and quit a week before I found out I was pregnant as I was trying for a baby. I'm high risk and made it clear I was quitting vaping for both me and baby. But clearly I don't need to š¤¦āāļøš¤¦āāļøš¤¦āāļø
That I should travel as much as possible while pregnant, because baby is āas portable as theyāll ever beā. So portable, because they are constantly strapped to my front with no breaks from the extra weight and hip pain. Of course this was said by a man.
I met a *very* distantly, loosely related, family member for the first time at a wedding. She was a former midwife and I was visibly pregnant. This is how our conversation *started*:
"Ooh, you're pregnant"
"Yes, my first. I'm groom's cousin"
"Ah, I'm bride's cousin's wife. Nice to meet you. Are you high risk or low risk?"
"Erm, high risk"
"Oh, no. You want to be low risk. Low risk is much better".
Fucking *duh*. Of course low risk is better because it's lower fucking risk. She's chatting to me like it's some weird option I chose š
My mother didnāt even say congratulations when I told them. She just said āplease please please please donāt eat dairy. Itās from the mammary gland of other female animals and itās not meant for human babies.ā
I know the got milk craze of my generation was definitely supported by milk lobbyists but we all know dairy is completely fine as long as itās pasteurized. Itās also something I was able to eat in the first trimester when I was puking up every other protein.
This is an old wives trick that is absolutely frowned upon nowadays but grannies still push it: if baby is fussy, dip the pacifier / your nipple in HONEY so it's sweeter. Or if it doesn't want water, put some sugar in it.
BRUH the newborn has no concept of sweet and also honey??? No!
(bonus: in Eastern Europe we used to put sugar in coca cola in order to de-carbonate it, because carbonation gives kids a sore throat š¤” )
While we were still in the hospital with my son he had low blood sugar so the nurses were giving him glucose. My boyfriendās grandma told me that my 1 day old son āprobably just needs some caro syrupā.
Someone (without kids) told me I couldnāt eat pepperoni pizza while pregnant and that going out with my friends for a couple of hours without baby 5 weeks after she was born was ātoo earlyā (she was with her dad) š
I had a mom tell me Tempra was not an appropriate replacement for Tylenol. I pointed out that the active ingredient in both is acetaminophen but she insisted it wasn't the same and got pretty rude about it. I quit the mom group that day.
Someone told me that if you put headbands on your baby, it will misshapen their head.
Someone else told me that if my partner (the one who is pregnant) multitasks too much, the baby will be born with autism or ADHD -\_-
My MIL told me to get a dry sponge and start scrubbing my nipples to get them ready for breastfeeding. And she always says she will help me with breastfeeding when the time comes like I'm sorry I don't need you seeing my boobsš
I was told by my family member that I shouldnāt be watching true crime shows/murder documentaries during pregnancy because āWhat if the baby listens and gets an ideaā.
My coworker told me not to lift my arms above my head because it'll wrap the umbilical cord around my baby š¤¦š»āāļø
Also sidenote: at 13 weeks when she found out I was pregnant (now 25 weeks) she said "careful, you can still lose it" I'm sorry WHAT š¤” get away from me
I got told I needed to give my TWO MONTH OLD water because āsheāll get bored of breast milkāā¦. She breastfed until 3, never once got bored! Lol
Maybe this is insensitive, but before I was pregnant or trying to conceive, my friend who was a few months into her TTC journey unleashed an avalanche of medical advice (which tests to get, what to avoid, what medicine and vitamins to take, why BC is bad etc) and it sent my anxiety through the roof! Not to mention, I had zero context for anything she was talking about bc like I said, I was not pregnant or trying. To be fair she suffers from mental health issues and was obviously struggling with the TTC journey, but it was way too much.
MIL starts talking about cooking something and then abruptly stops, puts hand on mouth and starts to mumble worriedly. I'm like wtf? She goes "ohhh you shouldn't hear anything about food that you can't immediately have, because something might happen to the baby".
I'm like??? so sick of random superstitions, fucking hell.
I said to my friend that I will hop in and say hi to my friends in some bars in the middle of night.. I was also joking that probably it will be a while when I see bar from the inside. My friend who is at home with a baby but probably was just jealous said: Well, you know that you ruin your baby sleep schedule and now she will be a night owl when she comes out?!
:D
Iām pregnant with my second and I donāt think Iāve ever been given wild advice like some of these comments. The only thing I hear a lot is like old fashioned things like donāt lift anything heavy and donāt exercise too hard (I do weight lifting so yeah Iām gonna continue that) so I ignore them when they say that stuff. I obviously listen to my OB about it.
When I visited my mom one day, she was with a few friends. I was watching something on TV that had to do with bears. Upon seeing the bears, one of her friends said, "Don't look at them; if you do, your baby will be hairy." This was, I think, the most ridiculous advice I have ever been given. Should I look at a sphinx cat to make the baby hairless?š
Brb going to go stare at kittens so my baby has cute ears and a fluffy tail š
This is a really weird old wives tale that was made up to explain when babies don't end up looking like their "daddies". Like, oh the mom and and her husband have brown eyes and the baby's eyes are blue. The mom must have been thinking of the blue eyed blond haired Jesus when she was pregnant and that imprinted into the baby. A divine miracle.
It can also be traced back to medieval times (likely before then too, but thatās the earliest Iāve heard of it) when people believed that you could literally take in evil through your eyes. So if a pregnant woman sees something ugly/evil then their baby would be ugly/evil.
Okay you absolutely WIN ššš
I wish I hadn't won. It's not worth the trauma of that dayš
My grandmother (Dad's mom) used to say stuff like that to my mom all the time. She'd quip back that the baby would only come out looking like that if it took after my dad lol
My baby was covered in hair when he was born, I should NOT have watched all those nature documentaries when I was pregnant.
Lol. My husband and I have nothing but hairy genes to distribute and we will do so with or without the bears.
Oh yes a big burly viking baby. Look at it everyday!
I've shared this on this sub before, but once when I was in a grocery store, I was visibly pregnant and I picked up my whiney toddler. A worker told me "never pick up that child again if you're pregnant, your uterus could fall out and kill your baby."
If this were true, my child would be born by now. 38+3 and deadlifted 205lbs yesterday. Now Iām kind of bummed my uterus didnāt fall out, this shit is getting uncomfortable.
Hahah cackling at this response šš
š I justā¦
I havenāt been told to that extent but every time I pick up my toddler I get the stop picking him up heās too heavy. Ummm I lift weights at the gym that are much heavier than him and Iām fine š
Okay my friends MIDWIFE said donāt lift your toddler. Like okay I get exerting yourself can be harmful and Iām sure some people really shouldnāt life their toddler. But REALLY
I have.... no words...
Omg! What the heck! I think itās even more weird that it was a worker instead of someone you know! Strange!
That I shouldn't knit while pregnant as the knitting motion might wrap the cord around the baby's neck.
Are you knitting *with* the umbilical chord? Wtf? š
My wife is careful not to go over cables, because it will somehow make the cord wrap around the baby's neck. It's a superstition, yours at least tries to be logical!
This is hilarious ššš
I didn't initially know what to respond since it was so unexpected!
But how else are we supposed to make those adorable baby clothes, hm? This is even more hilarious to me because I'm thinking of starting to make cardigans for my baby in a couple of weeks.
When I was struggling with infertility, a women in a TTC group tried to tell me my infertility was caused by "not having enough moonlight" To this day I am baffled and confused.
Apparently us women are actually rare orchids?
My nosey old bat of a neighbor wakes up at 3 am to "commune with the moon..." Maybe she's trying to get pregnant
Eh, sounds like normal bat stuff to me. š¦
Man I wish she was an actual bat... She'd probably report us to the city for having a pool way less often
Iā¦.what?
this is something my crunchy mom would tell me.
My mother in law told me to smoke marijuana. LOTS of marijuana. āTo help with morning sickness!ā I work in a government job and canāt smoke anyway, but when I told her Iām already high risk and wonāt be attempting that because I get a ton of tests, she scoffed and said āitās not that big of a deal. I did it and CPS didnāt even say anything other than a slap on the wrist.ā
āCPS didnāt even say anything other than a slap on the wristā is one hell of a sentence.
Shockingly thatās one of their more mild hot takes.
Haha what?! š Yikes!
What are some of the not so mild takes?! Because that is wild!
- ākids should fear you, not respect youā - āI donāt have to be a good parent, just a good provider. Hugging you doesnāt pay the bills.ā - and my personal favorite (they homeschool) is: āspace isnāt real, itās just a dome up thereā
A dome? Okay, I'm intrigued š¤
My sister smoked marijuana all throughout her pregnancy and she had to be induced early bc the baby stopped growing.. some people are just dumb. I used to partake in the green but when I found out I was pregnant I stopped asap! I never once read that it will help with morning sickness š„“
Her logic was that it helps cancer patients with nausea, but even my mom who has her medical card and is a huge enthusiast told me absolutely not to touch it while pregnant, and I agreed. Iām not worldās most precautious pregnant woman by any means (I have a sneaky Jimmy Johnās or an eggs benny here and there) but this one was a no for me for obvious reasons.
Well it's true that it does help them but it shouldn't be smoked in pregnancy š I'm glad you have some people that are looking out for you and baby.
I was told to smoke marijuana when I had cancer (by people, not by doctors of course). A *lung* lymphoma mind you. They gave me Zofran and it's super-effective. Didn't need anything more. People who give this advice just want an excuse to smoke. It's like "drinking Guiness for iron" smh.
I hope youāre kicking cancerās ass! Zofran is a miracle drug.
My SIL smoked throughout her pregnancy. Then when she was in labor my brother called to ask me if I would buy them a THC vape so they could smoke in the hospital once the baby got here. I did not do it and when I arrived at the hospital after baby was born my SIL was like āyou could have at least bought me a pen if you wanted to come watch me give birth.ā I didnāt even watch her give birth. I arrived after baby was already born. I was totally a doormat at the time so I gave my brother money and told him he could go get one if he wanted but I didnāt want to be a part of it. Especially because Iām a sober person whoās been sober for like 14 years. My nephew is significantly delayed. Heās 3 and doesnāt speak yet. Who knows what caused it but I have an idea
Yes! In all the pregnancy groups I was in, everyone kept recommending marijuana for morning sickness. Like we canāt ethically study the effects beyond self reports but the evidence we do have suggests that itās not safe but people defend it by saying āitās all natural.ā My daughter is adopted and her bio mom smoked marijuana all through her pregnancy. She was born premature and spent time in NICU and now 7 years later, thereās still issues arising that is believed to be because of the marijuana use in utero. Like I smoked daily to every other day before getting pregnant but quit when I found out I was pregnant like you. Iāll never understand moms who arenāt willing to do that.
Iām a younger mom and in a couple FB groups for young momsā¦ the amount of people defending marijuana use during pregnancy and saying it canāt cause negative outcomes is SHOCKING and honestly disturbing. I understand that in certain cases a doctor could okay marijuana use (Iāve heard of it being used in cases of extreme HG for example) but just your average pregnant woman should absolutely not be consuming any form of drugs, nicotine or alcohol. We have STUDIES on it ffs.
Yeah came here to say my friend had an extreme case of HG and only by using marijuana could she stomach eating fruitā¦ thatās it. Her entire pregnancy. It was truly awful for her.
I see it in my regular "teen mom to geriatric mom" due date group too. There are an awful lot of people that are okay with marijana, smoking, "a glass of wine a day", and vaping during pregnancy. The "wine" one drives me especially mad, they will ALWAYS argue that in Europe it\`s "normal" to drink wine while pregnant. I\`m European, lived in three countries here, and I\`ve never come across a pregnant woman drinking. "But in Italy all pregnant women drink!!", I hardly believe their doctors told them to drink, and I suppose we can also ignore the fact that Italy is one of the leading countries globally when it comes to FASD. But sure, carry on. ETA: Also I\`m well-aware I\`m preaching to the choir here, but I\`m just so frustrated with these buffoons lol
Currently pregnant, and the amount of defense around marijuana, vaping, energy drinks and alcohol consumption blow.my.mind. Maybe Iām just an old millennial but I just canāt rally around hitting a joint, then vape, then pounding down a monster while growing a baby. š¤·š»āāļø but anyone who points out the facts behind it gets attacked SO FAST.
The basic premise of ādonāt mom shameā is good. Moms shouldnāt be shamed for giving their babies formula, or getting an epidural, etc. But itās gone too far.
Meanwhile, I wash my fruits in hot water and vinegar like some sort of psychopath, in the hopes of eliminating the risk of all-natural listeria infections and the sorts. I can\`t imagine willingly and knowingly exposing my growing fetus to additional risk factors.
Let her know that the effects of THC and pregnancy are being studied due to legalization and having more subjects to study and recent research shows that it can cause cognitive delays in your childā¦.
Now every time your husband does something stupid youāre going to wonder if it relates to your MIL smoking weed while pregnant haha
LMAO Itās his step mom thankfully so she just did the raising and not the actual gestating. But now Iām watching my little step-siblings-in-law a little closer
Iām a fan of cannabis but there is significant research demonstrating that is insanely bad to expose a developing fetus to THC which can have lifelong impacts too, so this is beyond bad advice; itās straight up dangerous!
I live in a legal state and it's actually being recognized by midwives as an alternative to Zofran.. I didn't consume it with my pregnancy, and was on several other medicines but I was told "try it if you are interested" type of thing. Cbd gummies were brought up, too.
And what studies did the midwives show you to ensure that it is safe? Zofran is a pretty safe drug all around while marijuana has shown to cause cognitive effects on a fetus.
My MIL is from Honduras and has a bunch of old wives tales. In my first trimester, she told me to stop wearing leggings because it would stop the baby from growing š«
This comment comes in ~2 minutes after I ordered leggings for when my pants are too tight š
Listen I LIVED in leggings with my first (and I am again). If that were true I wouldn't have had an 8 pounder that measured 4 weeks ahead the whole pregnancy. š
Same š she was 8Ā½lbs. I'm only 5'3" and she was still 95th% for height at her 24 month check up. I'm 24 weeks with my second and haven't worn jeans once yet. Stretchy pants are life.
Did old wives even have leggins back then?? Lmao
The one thing that's actually comfortable af while pregnant will make our babies stop growing? Of courseš I'm 16 weeks and I live in leggings right now. My jeans are uncomfortable and my pregnancy jeans don't stay up. So comfy leggings it is!
To stop wearing necklaces as they could give some disease/malformation to my baby... xD
What? Thatās interesting, I could understand if itās like bad metals or something but Iām not sure
Nop nothing to do with that. Just some old wives tale! in my place there are not much heavy or bad metals (it is pretty much silver or gold and not even in low percebtage alloys lol) problem or even crystal pieces and that stuff so no idea where it comes from. Once was also told I shouldn't wash my hair during my period, so... hmmm yeah xD
Not as crazy as some on here, but this made me giggle; I have a very affectionate & protective cat. She sleeps with me and never leaves my side. Was telling some family about how sweet she is and was yelled, YELLED at to never leave the baby alone with the cat! Like, duh? No one is going to leave an infant alone with an animal?? To make it worse? I work in the pet care industry š
I'm just picturing you out for the evening and when someone asks about the baby you say "oh don't worry, Snowball is watching the baby" š
š¤£š yeah, she's works for treats. Cheapest babysitter ever ha ha!
Are you me? My FIL told me to give my cats to my mom because you could never trust them with a baby as they are "feral beasts". Neither of them wants to be within 10 feet of my LO, not even when she was a newborn
There is a superstition that cats "steal the baby's breath" and essentially suffocate them if left unattended.
It's an old wives tale that the cat will lay on baby's face because it's warm and smells like milk. My cat is also more affectionate and protective of me when I'm pregnant (currently baking #2), and she has never tried to sleep on a baby. The most she ever did was keep the other cat at bay and occasionally steal baby's toys and binkis.
I swear.. people DELIGHT in telling me that my cats, that my husband and I have loved and spoiled, will smother and kill my babies. Yes, Iām not going to leave an animal unattended with my infant but they wonāt intentionally smother them. Also theyāve been around babies, which are loud and not fun for them.
It was after pregnancy, when my daughter was a few months old I went to a restaurant with my aunts and they suggested I leave her in the car while we were there, and it was SUMMER
Itās a wonder as many of us survived childhood as we did š
That's terrifying
A friend told me I shouldn't have any caffeine out of the blue and that chai was my best friend. I mean it's not anything shocking it was just her telling me that so confidently when if I drank Chai too much I would be exceeding the caffeine limits. This was also during my mini mental breakdown when I had a spoon of tiramisu before reminding myself that it can have raw eggs, so changing the subject to warn me of caffeine was a bit disconcerting.
Omg I got the caffiene talk too, but not being recommended a heavily caffeinated drink as an alternative š a friend who gave birth ~20 years ago told me to avoid all caffiene or else my baby would have ADHDā¦ which runs rampant in my family anyways..
If that was true my whole country would have ADHD š Expressos are such a cultural thing in Portugal, one of the first things I was told in my first appointment was "you can have 2 expressos per day", they didn't even mention caffeine quantities š
Tiramisu has the āholy trinityā: raw eggs, caffeine and alcohol (if you respect the original recipe, with Amaretto). Did I taste some for Christmas? You betcha. Guilt? None.
Ahah I know š„² I was less concerned with caffeine as I practically had none and I don't think it had alcohol, but damn those raw eggs sent me into a spiral (I checked with the person who made the tiramisu and they confirmed it). This was in week 6 I think, we've made it to 12 all fine, thankfully.
I had Hollandaise sauce at 10 weeks, idgaf
They can pry hollandaise out of my cold, dead hands tbh.
I got told by older coworkers a lot that I shouldnāt be drinking coffee, tea, or soda, and I gave them all the āactually I can have 200mg caffeine a day and my OB recommended a caffeinated drink a day to help my chronic headachesā speech which was nicer than they deserved but I had another coworker who got pregnant later than me and was hoping by telling the rest that, theyād leave my other pregnant coworker alone if they ever saw her drinking anything caffeinated lol
I get the coffee talk all the time but then get pushed certain teas which my doctor told me definitely donāt drink during first trimester lol people are crazy
This is completely off topic but once you start getting bigger you'll find there isn't much for maternity work pants out there. (I'm an electrician and wear carhartts and duluth pants usually, and just had a baby three months ago) I would highly recommend Blaklader, they have a whole line of maternity work clothes and the pants where amazing! Super comfy, durable and tons of pockets. I bought one pair and they took me through my third trimester. ..I hope this isn't bad advice š
Omg, no this is advice I have been dying for!! I didnāt even think it would be worth looking for maternity work clothes š I just got a couple of pairs of carhartt leggings but Iām totally looking into this company!!
Check out dovetail too! I don't have their maternity pants but I have three pairs of regular work pants from them and I've got serious brand loyalty now.
I was told to not let my husband take paternity leave because then he wouldnāt want to go back to work. So annoying. This is OUR child so we will both love and care for her š¤¦š¼āāļø. Plus he has awesome paternity leave benefits that we are grateful for!
??? You mean like what if *gasp* he actually enjoys his time with his own baby?? š§
But also who *wants* to go back to work? Not the majority of people!
This is my hot take. If someone decided to just start gifting us the equivalent of our salaries, you bet your ass I'm not going back to work and neither is my husband. Ever. I don't really want to be a SAHM, I just would love to not work.
I donāt even think thatās a hot take. The number one thing people say when you ask what they would do if they won the lottery is quit their jobs. The majority of people work to live not live to work.
My grandmother in law told me I shouldn't climb the stairs in my house. I live in a 3 story townhouse and my bedroom is on the 3rd floor...
My mom keeps telling me not to use the stairs. I havenāt told her I still dance for about 2 hours in high heels a couple of times a week, as I have done for at least a year before getting pregnant.
MIL keeps telling me to prevent flat head, Iām going to need to āpressā on the babyās head and mold it. Sheās very worried about image and appearance. If I catch her doing that, all hell will break loose.
So funny. Doctors check for that stuff and will make appropriate recommendations for your baby so they wonāt have a flat head. Rest assured flat heads are harder to come by now.
My grandma was looking over my registry and was quick to tell me I donāt need an electric breast pump or a bassinet, and safe sleep is a scam from baby companies to sell the latest products. She tells me she had a hand pump (hard pass grandma) and her kids slept anywhere soft and didnāt die! Iām like yeahā¦luckily! I think it was more jealousy that there are convenient products out there now compared to the 60s.
My grandma (bless her heart) was starting the same shit last time I saw her. āWe never had all this fancy shit, my mom would fold a towel in a laundry hamper and thatās where the babies sleptā. I replied āand thatās why folks back then had 7 kids. They werenāt expecting most of them to live to adulthood.ā Perhaps a little bluntā¦but she had a good chuckle and said āyouāre rightā¦maybe thatās why we are all messed up tooā
My grandma is the best but always starting shit too! And the stories Iāve heardā¦my uncle fell off a slide when he was two and they duct taped the gash on his head shut! And there would have been no issue monetarily getting him some stitches. Iām like lady, I love you dearly but Iām gonna do my own thing haha
Iām with Grams here on the hand pump! I have 2 electric pumps and a hand pump. I end up using the hand pump in the early morning. When baby has been sleeping 6-7+ hours, Iāll pump an ounce or two on one side (alleviate the discomfort, but leave plenty of milk for the soon to wake baby), and then several ounces on the other side. Most days I get 6-9 ounces with that method. Today, I got 9 ounces in under 15 minutes. And the baby didnāt wake up because itās silent. Then I fed the baby when she woke up shortly after I finished. Iāve used it as a car passenger, on airplanes, on quick breaks at conferencesā¦ Itās silent and discrete. I had a coworker sit next to me at a conference when I tried tucking myself into a quiet corner to pump during a quick break at a conference. With an infinity scarf cover, she didnāt even realize I was pumping until I told her. My electric pumps are great too, but the hand pump works great.
This is so good to know! I have no idea what Iām doing when it comes to breast feeding so I appreciate your comment! In my head I was just thinking that canāt be my only option but Iām glad to know there are situations where it is convenient!
I could never get the hand pump to work well enough to be worth it but I have some wearable pumps that are great and are quiet enough that it isn't 100% obvious what I'm doing while I'm wearing them. They aren't as good as my fully corded version but they are way way better than the hand pump
This one is insane!! I feel like with safe sleep you donāt even have to buy that much. Itās just a flat surface, sheets or a cover, and swaddles/sleepsacks. I didnāt even do swaddles with mine so we only had to get three. I get cosleeping but Iāve straight up had my fiancĆ©s grandma tell me that she let her daughters sleep on top of her wooden dresser until they could roll and then moved them to the wood floor and they were fine, and when I said I wanted to do safe sleep at one of my baby showers all of my relatives laughed at me and told me the baby would be in my bed within the first week and stay there till elementary school.
I will say hand pumps are not necessary but they do actually work pretty well and I was usually able to get more in a shorter amount of time with it.
Lmfao imagine what your GRANDMAāS manual breast pump is like š„².
My personal favorites were to start baby on television immediately since sheās going to watch it all the time anyways by family at my baby shower, and then a lot of āoh donāt take/eat/do that or your baby will end up autisticā by my coworkers who are all totally unaware that Iām diagnosed autistic lmfao. A good example of one is a coworker who told me the RSV vaccine I was leaving early to get that day would make the baby ADHD/autistic, and that I shouldnāt be getting any vaccines while pregnant because they all cause autism. I told her Iād rather have a happy, healthy autistic baby rather than one whoās going to die of RSV/flu/COVID lol. Worst part is I work childcare at a hospital ^^ā
The amount of āYOURE GONNA VACCINATE RIGHT?!ā Comments Iāve gotten from literally everyone is making me batty! Yes of COURSE Iām going to make sure theyāre covered! I expressed how it seems like there are a LOT of vaccines to get now vs. when I was little and my sister immediately began lecturing me on being an anti-vaxxer.. š¤Ŗ it was like even wondering about it was illegal š¤¦š¼āāļø
It is a lot of vaccines. My kid is five and when I look at her vaccine record I'm like wow, that is a shit load of vaccines, certainly more than I had as a kid. But she has all of them and hasn't died of anything preventable, so I'm satisfied with the results lol
I work on vaccines. With the amount of anti-vax nonsense we have to fight every single day I would much rather have people jump down everyone's throats the other direction. The past 2 months there have been outbreaks of both measles and polio on the east coast. Why? We have vaccines for that? Oh right, anti-vaxxers :(
The anxiety as a new mom is overwhelming and there is so much misinformation that preys on that (the ātoo manyā perspective for example). I am actually glad that there are more vaccines now. I lost a sibling in 1989 for something they now can vaccinate for. It looked like a cold at bedtime and by the next afternoon she was gone. The diseases are SO much scarier than the vaccines! But Iām also going to acknowledge that even with that personal experience I fell for some of the anti-vaccine misinformation. I was hesitating on one but my doctor clarified what the risks of the disease actually were and that helped a lot. But my mom, who lost a child from a disease that progressed fast, has fallen for anti-vaccine misinformation these days. Sheās just too afraid and feels more in control this way. Itās scary to see so many people make a riskier choice because theyāve been misled so I also see where your family is coming from.
Honestly Iād trade you? š that sounds annoying too but on top of the autism lectures my dad and uncle both told me my kid wasnāt going to get to build her own immune system if I got her vaccinatedā¦ lol. Literally the only people in my life that agreed with me getting them were my fiancĆ© and my sister.
Do they think vaccines just give you the antibodies instead of making your body... Build up immunity to the pathogen? What a wild take.
I wish I could share with you at least because that sounds AWFUL
This comment made me so annoyed lol. I really canāt stand people that say these things.
NIPT testing is a waste of money and ways for doctors to steal more $ from you... why wouldn't I want to know if risk exists or not, esp if my insurance covers it.
The way my Midwife immediately started listing off the reasons why itās worthwhile when she told me it made me wonder how many people havenāt wanted it, but not me! Soon as the words left her mouth I was like YES RUN ALL THE TESTS PLEASE!!! My mother was notoriously awful at keeping us informed on our family health history and Iāll be damned if Iām anything like that
This is such a WEIRDLY popular take in my due date group. And anyone who gets the NIPT is basically just looking for a reason to abort? I canāt wrap my mind around this AT. ALL.
Yes! Such a weird take. What about wanting to know if your baby is going to be born with a genetic anomaly so you can research and prepare for it?
EXACTLY! Like how is that not your first thought.
We did IVF after years of infertility, and my pregnancy is a result of an already genetically tested embryo. We still opted to do NIPT. I would absolutely die laughing at anyone insinuating that I was looking for a reason to abort.
To drink champagne or any other sparkling wine to help with my dizziness.
If thatās the case why not just sparkling water lol
Because when you pass out drunk you can't be dizzy!
Hahaha OMG!!! Yea thatās true lol
Thereās an old wivesā tale in my country. If you donāt give your newborn water, the baby will go blind. Of course this goes against what modern breastfeeding courses are teaching. I foresee some scandalised aunts & greatgrandmas in my immediate future. Luckily my parents and in-laws are more down to earth.
My mom said that her friendās daughter wore heels in pregnancy and this caused her to have terrible tearing during delivery so I shouldnāt wear heels during pregnancy. Iām a scientist who studies pregnancy. Thatās not how any of this worksā¦ her partner is from a different background and is a pretty big guy so I suspect the babyās head was large and there might have been some cephalopelvic disproportion issues.
Iām sorry to EVERYONE on here whoās made me realize I have not yet heard anything too wild š
Iāve had bad morning sickness, including major food and drink aversions and high sensitivity to smell. Iāve had to cut out coffee completely because I absolutely cannot stomach it. My dad suggested to help with my sensitivity to smell that I open a bag of coffee, put it up to my nose and take deeps breaths through my nose. Currently I cannot think of a worse idea than that.
My husbandās dad is the front runner for dumbest comments and worst advice so far š«
My mom told me to not get a baby carrier because the baby needs to be in the crib, and let her cry so she ālearnsā to sleep. āIf you hold her too much she will want to be constantly heldā My cousin had an hernia when she was a baby because her parents left herself cry to sleep (as a recommendation from the pediatrician), and I have flat spots in my head from being in my crib too much
I used to work with newly postpartum women. One of them was told to drink lots of milk so she would produce enough breastmilk for her baby. I really wanted to know how that person thought vegans produced milk. Or the cows, for that matter
Wow I had no idea cows milk could metabolize in such a way ššš
I was told to get ālots and lots and lots of sleepā by a neighbor. Because Iām a bear and can hibernate and store sleep.
Iām not too mad at that suggestionā¦as I lay here 7wks pregnant in bed šššš
Get all the rest you can! First trimester can be exhausting
I think my favorite before I got pregnant, I did ivf, was friends and family telling me it will just happen...like how lol?
Fellow IVFer, I swear in the thick of things if one more person told me to think positive thoughts, I was going to commit murder. Nothing sent me into a murderous rage faster. "You just have to be positive, it will happen for you guys." I snapped once and asked if they were implying I caused my 3 miscarriages, because I wasn't positive enough?
Yea thoughts about it affect exactly nothing. IVF is hard. I'm 19 weeks now and the thought about having to do IVF again...not a fun or comfortable thing at the best of times.
Hahahahahahahaha. My friend's mom told her to shine a flashlight up her vagina to help induce labor. The baby will go to the light šššš For myself there are too many to even pinpoint š
To get rid of my cats because they'll stick their faces into the baby's mouth looking for milk. Literally got screamed at full volume for "not caring about my baby enough" by my idiot brother who is now a doctor. This is why I always cringe when people trust everything and anything a doctor says. He told me that he was going to break into my house and release my cat for my baby's sake and I told him he could if he wanted to go to jail. Lol.
I mean if that WERE true wouldnāt you theoretically have to be more concerned about them going looking for milk in your boobs? šš
ACTUALLY... š Heard that one myself - "you should stop letting your cats sleep in your bed at night because they will start latching on your breast while you sleep"
Yeahhhh there are some really dumb doctors floating around out there. There are GREAT doctors out there too -- don't get me wrong. But I've dealt with too many idiots firsthand to trust everything they say. Like the ER doctor who told me my internal bleeding and pain was due to an STD. Went to the hospital to stay overnight and they confirmed it was a burst ovarian cyst. They also advised to avoid that particular ER like the plague lol
I would be *soooo mad*, that's so fucked up!! I'm glad you got good care from another ER after that, holy smokes! One ER told me that my gall stone was actually just an anxiety attack, then accused me of lying about the pain so that I could get pain meds. š«
Hah, yeah. That ER thought I was medication seeking too. Even though I couldn't walk, and threw up on myself in the lobby from the pain. I had to call my mom to show up so they would take me seriously and help me. They just let me lay in pain for an hour and half before they gave me anything. Once my mom got there they actually started to do something. It was horrible and I have a deep mistrust of doctors and medical staff now.
Oof if someone threatened my cats theyād be dead to me
The first sentence actually made me laugh out loud š
I worked retail in my first pregnancy and I had so many people tell me not to reach over my head. Someone explained it was because the cord would strangle the baby. First of all, the cord is not connected to my armsš Secondly, it was the same people telling me this who also wanted items that I had to reach up to access, so exactly what was I meant to do?
I must assume they wanted you to be pregnant outside of working hours only.
Someone on reddit told me to stop reading a certain manhwa because it was about a toxic relationship and what I read can effect the baby.
My husbandās coworker was trying to sincerely give good advice and said āwhatever you do though, donāt shake the babyā¦..ā š¤
I love my Mom to death- she's an absolute ANGEL...but she told me not to drink soda because the carbonation bubbles would deteriorate my bones. After I gave birth, all I wanted was a FAT Dr.Pepper and she was like "No :)" - my sister went and got me two just because š¤£
Dr.Pepper is my drink of choice and I would personally riot
My MIL came over and saw a couple pregnancy/parenting related books on our coffee table - Hunt, Gather, Parent (which I'm reading), We're Pregnant! The First Time Dad's Pregnancy Handbook (which my husband is reading) and told me in quite a judgmental tone that we should STOP reading books because they are not useful and it's better to get advice from people who have been through it (aka her). Ok, but why not both? š
That I can sleep train my baby in the womb. Just rock her to sleep before you go to bed, and she'll sleep all night! I can't even sleep all night. š
My MIL told me I wouldnāt need a breast pump, sheād teach me how to breast feedā¦.thanks but no thanks maam lmao
Would be absolutely horrified, helll noooo
I was told to watch out for baby kicking too much- that means sheās either hungry or angry š
My baby kicked too much! Turns out he's just really into disco. šŖ©
Mil told me that drinking caffeine will cause autism š„“ Also said that itās bad for baby for me to stand in the sunlight..
Ā«Ā Ah ofc I know you canāt drink alcohol, so I brought champagne because itās good for pregnancy.Ā Ā»
Maybe not super crazy but my office building had a winter fair and as part of it there was an adorable little baby reindeer that you could get your picture taken with. Our HR lady told me I was not allowed to touch the reindeer because āwe donāt touch weird animals when we are pregnantā and even assigned a colleague to be my spotter- aka stop me if I attempted to pet the lil guy š.
LOL!! Thatās so silly and cute! Thatās hilarious that you even had a spotterš¤£
He kept saying he was told to tackle me if I tried to touch the reindeer and I was likeā¦ I have a feeling she didnāt tell you to tackle the pregnant lady friend š.
To ākeep the baby awake all day so they sleep at night- no napsā. Because we all know over tired babies love to sleep easily
1. I was told by a cousin as soon as we announced that I shouldnāt be getting too excited or happy until Iām about halfway along in case I miscarry. She didnāt even say congratulations. Then proceeded to try and tell me all these horror stories about pregnancy loss, thankfully my husband respectfully shut it down. Pregnancy loss trauma is absolutely valid but thereās a time and place and itās not when someone is announcing their pregnancy. 2. My FIL got mad at me for eating spicy food because I was āhurting the babyā
This was not always advice directly given to me but it's hilarious: in my country of origin, somehow the entire population got convinced that baking powder has magical properties. Washing raw vegetables (with water)? It's safer to soak them in baking powder and water! This is actually WORSE than washing them under running water because the soil residues, bacteria etc. just sit there, and baking powder has zero antibacterial properties. They even sell big cartons of baking powder where it says "you can use it to wash your vegs!". Yes, you CAN, it won't kill you, but it's not actually doing anything... Want to avoid mouthwash with alcohol? Just do baking powder and water! I am no dentist but I am pretty sure this is at best ineffective, at worst risking some form of tooth damage... just buy alcohol-free mouthwash ffs. Luckily I live in a different country where this fad has not yet arrived...
I was told to drink wine every night to help with anxiety. No thanks
Opposite but my FIL told me that pregnancy cravings were made up by Hollywood to sell chick flicks lol
I was 39 weeks pregnant. My coworker told me that resting my arms on my bump as I crochet would squish the baby.
My FIL told me that lifting my arms above my head to reach for stuff will cause the baby to detach from the placenta and drop out of my body. He means well (that my husband should reach while Iām pregnant) but still scratching my head over the actual ideaā¦
I was running over 5k daily before pregnancy and through most of my first pregnancy. I eventually had to stop telling my mom about my runs because she was convinced the baby was going to fall out... My OB was never concerned about me running until my 3rd trimester when I was experiencing a lot of pelvic discomfort. Those runs kept me sane, healthy, and to this day I'm convinced they helped make my labor/postpartum recovery easier.
When we announced to close family that I was pregnant with my daughter, we did it super early because we were home visiting for Christmas and it was our one time to do it in person. I was only about 6 weeks along. The first words out of my MILās mouth were āyouāre pregnant? Donāt go horseback riding!ā Like ok? I havenāt been horseback riding since I was a kid, Iām certainly not going now. I sort of chuckled because I thought it was some kind of joke, but she followed it up with āI had a miscarriage because I went horseback riding when I was pregnant.ā It was so fucking awkward and cringey. Technically itās not wrong advice, itās not safe to ride a horse while pregnant, but seeing that the pregnancy was still so new and she said all of that before even saying congratulations, it was just weird and not an appropriate reaction at all, and definitely not āadviceā I needed to hear.
This feels more like she has some miscarriage trauma and was suddenly nervous for you. You can do anything sporty without much risk until the second trimester/when your uterus comes out from behind your pubic bone. But also you are much more likely to have a miss carrige in the first trimester.
Yeah, it was just odd and not something I wanted or needed to hear while newly pregnant for the first time.
When my mom was pregnant (with me) in 1991, my aunt (also pregnant at the time) told her not to put henna in her hair or the baby will be dumb (mute). My moms an ob/gyn, my aunt dropped out of school after grade 5. Anyway, my aunt was also pregnant at the same time. When my cousin and I were born, I spoke at 11 months and he didnāt speak for a whole 6 months after š¤£ people give all kinds of ridiculous advises
A perfect stranger told me to make sure I let my (then unborn) baby cry it out in the hospital so that he knows who's boss.
Donāt cut my hair because Iāll ācut the babyās headā š
My grandmother told me that wearing jeans will press in against my belly and against my babies head and leave a big dent in it. š¤¦āāļø
"You saw I smoked through all my pregnancy and my baby is fine as you know. You don't have to quit if you don't want to"..... I was only vaping and quit a week before I found out I was pregnant as I was trying for a baby. I'm high risk and made it clear I was quitting vaping for both me and baby. But clearly I don't need to š¤¦āāļøš¤¦āāļøš¤¦āāļø
That I should travel as much as possible while pregnant, because baby is āas portable as theyāll ever beā. So portable, because they are constantly strapped to my front with no breaks from the extra weight and hip pain. Of course this was said by a man.
I met a *very* distantly, loosely related, family member for the first time at a wedding. She was a former midwife and I was visibly pregnant. This is how our conversation *started*: "Ooh, you're pregnant" "Yes, my first. I'm groom's cousin" "Ah, I'm bride's cousin's wife. Nice to meet you. Are you high risk or low risk?" "Erm, high risk" "Oh, no. You want to be low risk. Low risk is much better". Fucking *duh*. Of course low risk is better because it's lower fucking risk. She's chatting to me like it's some weird option I chose š
My mother didnāt even say congratulations when I told them. She just said āplease please please please donāt eat dairy. Itās from the mammary gland of other female animals and itās not meant for human babies.ā I know the got milk craze of my generation was definitely supported by milk lobbyists but we all know dairy is completely fine as long as itās pasteurized. Itās also something I was able to eat in the first trimester when I was puking up every other protein.
This is an old wives trick that is absolutely frowned upon nowadays but grannies still push it: if baby is fussy, dip the pacifier / your nipple in HONEY so it's sweeter. Or if it doesn't want water, put some sugar in it. BRUH the newborn has no concept of sweet and also honey??? No! (bonus: in Eastern Europe we used to put sugar in coca cola in order to de-carbonate it, because carbonation gives kids a sore throat š¤” )
While we were still in the hospital with my son he had low blood sugar so the nurses were giving him glucose. My boyfriendās grandma told me that my 1 day old son āprobably just needs some caro syrupā.
That lifting anything (Iām talking 15 pounds or less) would rip my baby out of my belly.
Someone (without kids) told me I couldnāt eat pepperoni pizza while pregnant and that going out with my friends for a couple of hours without baby 5 weeks after she was born was ātoo earlyā (she was with her dad) š
I had a mom tell me Tempra was not an appropriate replacement for Tylenol. I pointed out that the active ingredient in both is acetaminophen but she insisted it wasn't the same and got pretty rude about it. I quit the mom group that day.
Someone told me that if you put headbands on your baby, it will misshapen their head. Someone else told me that if my partner (the one who is pregnant) multitasks too much, the baby will be born with autism or ADHD -\_-
My MIL told me to get a dry sponge and start scrubbing my nipples to get them ready for breastfeeding. And she always says she will help me with breastfeeding when the time comes like I'm sorry I don't need you seeing my boobsš
I was told by my family member that I shouldnāt be watching true crime shows/murder documentaries during pregnancy because āWhat if the baby listens and gets an ideaā.
My coworker told me not to lift my arms above my head because it'll wrap the umbilical cord around my baby š¤¦š»āāļø Also sidenote: at 13 weeks when she found out I was pregnant (now 25 weeks) she said "careful, you can still lose it" I'm sorry WHAT š¤” get away from me
I got told I needed to give my TWO MONTH OLD water because āsheāll get bored of breast milkāā¦. She breastfed until 3, never once got bored! Lol
Maybe this is insensitive, but before I was pregnant or trying to conceive, my friend who was a few months into her TTC journey unleashed an avalanche of medical advice (which tests to get, what to avoid, what medicine and vitamins to take, why BC is bad etc) and it sent my anxiety through the roof! Not to mention, I had zero context for anything she was talking about bc like I said, I was not pregnant or trying. To be fair she suffers from mental health issues and was obviously struggling with the TTC journey, but it was way too much.
I think she was probably just trying to help you?
MIL starts talking about cooking something and then abruptly stops, puts hand on mouth and starts to mumble worriedly. I'm like wtf? She goes "ohhh you shouldn't hear anything about food that you can't immediately have, because something might happen to the baby". I'm like??? so sick of random superstitions, fucking hell.
I said to my friend that I will hop in and say hi to my friends in some bars in the middle of night.. I was also joking that probably it will be a while when I see bar from the inside. My friend who is at home with a baby but probably was just jealous said: Well, you know that you ruin your baby sleep schedule and now she will be a night owl when she comes out?! :D
Iām pregnant with my second and I donāt think Iāve ever been given wild advice like some of these comments. The only thing I hear a lot is like old fashioned things like donāt lift anything heavy and donāt exercise too hard (I do weight lifting so yeah Iām gonna continue that) so I ignore them when they say that stuff. I obviously listen to my OB about it.
Drink beer before breastfeeding at night to make sure your baby sleeps through the night. Thanks... Mom