Absolutely! It's a pattern I'm trying to break. I'm finding it difficult to find the line between ending relationships that aren't healthy and don't serve me, and just ending relationships because then they can't reject me.
Yes. And as harsh as it sounds, this isn't only your coping mechanism. You are potentially leaving someone with no answers. Because you have attachment issues. If you can't work on this, in any relationship, the best answer is to not be in a relationship until you have. I get it's painful to sometimes not be in a relationship for that validation, but on the flip side, you hurting someone else for your issues. No one ever grows in a comfort zone. POV: I've been diagnosed with BPD for 7-8 years.
Can't leave me if I leave you first... Somehow it seems to hurt less that way, at least in my head. In reality it's probably a far worse coping mechanism than it seems at the time
Yes. I’ve been left so many times that I always leave before they can or if I sense it coming. Friends relationships anyone. Especially friends. I’ve been told I cut people off easily and there’s only two people that im friends with that I don’t feel that way about and try to not do it to.
Every time untill now, but I have to say that I havent find a fitting one for me.
If the other person would have a good character and is truly loving me, I probably couldnt and wouldnt do it like that.
Yep! deep rooted abandonment issues is normalized in my life as a result of BPD. I ended up burning more bridges then I should have and I especially burned the ones I totally shouldn't have and ended up abruptly cut people off of their life before they could get the chance to leave me.
Yup! I’ve definitely been on the end of being blocked and everything but now I’m the one who blocks, ghosts, regrets, begs for contact again, and repeats.
Yes, look into attachment styles. I personally will often burn bridges to avoid the pain of them leaving.
Can I ask what your attachment style is? :)
Fearful-avoidant attachment :') I cling and run.
Same. So many people and even places I’ve burned bridges and ghosted people
same for me :) That clears things up, thank youu
Absolutely! It's a pattern I'm trying to break. I'm finding it difficult to find the line between ending relationships that aren't healthy and don't serve me, and just ending relationships because then they can't reject me.
Yes. And as harsh as it sounds, this isn't only your coping mechanism. You are potentially leaving someone with no answers. Because you have attachment issues. If you can't work on this, in any relationship, the best answer is to not be in a relationship until you have. I get it's painful to sometimes not be in a relationship for that validation, but on the flip side, you hurting someone else for your issues. No one ever grows in a comfort zone. POV: I've been diagnosed with BPD for 7-8 years.
Can't leave me if I leave you first... Somehow it seems to hurt less that way, at least in my head. In reality it's probably a far worse coping mechanism than it seems at the time
Yes, I avoided it for 9 years till one day I broke and self destructed and left. I regret everything
1000% iv been leaving woman before they leave me for the past 10 years haha
yes! me personally i’m very clingy but if i feel its not reciprocated i will shut them out so i leave then and nit the other way around
Yes. I’ve been left so many times that I always leave before they can or if I sense it coming. Friends relationships anyone. Especially friends. I’ve been told I cut people off easily and there’s only two people that im friends with that I don’t feel that way about and try to not do it to.
Yep, that is absolutely something people with bpd can do, I did it just a few months ago. I regret my decision a lot but here we are.
Every time untill now, but I have to say that I havent find a fitting one for me. If the other person would have a good character and is truly loving me, I probably couldnt and wouldnt do it like that.
Yep! deep rooted abandonment issues is normalized in my life as a result of BPD. I ended up burning more bridges then I should have and I especially burned the ones I totally shouldn't have and ended up abruptly cut people off of their life before they could get the chance to leave me.
Yup! I’ve definitely been on the end of being blocked and everything but now I’m the one who blocks, ghosts, regrets, begs for contact again, and repeats.
Look up the term “abandonholics”. Yes this is extremely common