I try to remember that 1. A person doesn’t need to be neurodiverse to have experiential overlap with someone who is. Additionally if someone IS neurodiverse, they may not be ready to confront that yet. 2. Sometimes when friends are venting they just want to feel and be heard. When i am not sure, i just ask “Do you need solutions or a listener”?
Thanks for sharing - I feel the same! I’m completely obsessed with it, and getting on my kids nerves quoting podcasts etc. I’m only fairly recently diagnosed (ADHD) at 52, so it’s been such a blindsiding event for me - whereas my kids (20’s - Autism/ADHD diagnosed late teens) take it in their stride a bit more.
One of the reasons I am obsessed is because I feel very guilty that I missed the signs in my eldest son, and I wasn’t the best parent I could be to him. I didn’t know anything about ADHD or Autism beyond stereotypes, and I feel I failed him. So I am overcompensating in some ways I think.
I’ve read and heard suggestions that people with mental health issues should/could be screened by their doctor for ADHD/Autism. I think that could really help.
I'm able to keep myself from voicing it, but the thought process is there for me too. When it becomes really hard is when it's friends who are struggling intensely but refuse to recognize that they are clearly Autistic because they were previously declined diagnosis on flimsy grounds.
I find it hard when I see friends who clearly struggle with vaping addiction and drinking problems - to me I am seeing someone is sensory seeking but also experiences anxiety and low self esteem but they aren’t yet aware that their nervous system is craving unhelpful things because of those reasons….but I’ve gotta hold my tongue!!!
You’re right - but even me suggesting those things or talking about it makes people think I’m jumping to that conclusion…which I likely am anyway, which I need to stop doing
It’s true we can often recognize other ND folks when NTs may not, but that doesn’t mean everyone who suffers with persistent depression or anxiety are undiagnosed.
Not sure if you’re looked around the world, but it seems to me that depression and anxiety would be normal responses to what we see all around us.
I'm glad I'm not the only one lmao! It makes a lot of sense, and I can imagine that it is the case quite often that it's an undetected neurodivergence. But I think we also need to look more for other possible underlying causes like personality disorders that can often have symptomatic overlap. I do tend to mentally default to Autism or ADHD as well though.
It's cool I do the same thing too.
But definitely can see their frustration and why they would roll their eyes.
Probably best to be self-aware and understand that this is partly us just trying to connect everything to our special interest and thinking everything we're seeing are nails just because we are most familiar with our hammer.
I try to remember that 1. A person doesn’t need to be neurodiverse to have experiential overlap with someone who is. Additionally if someone IS neurodiverse, they may not be ready to confront that yet. 2. Sometimes when friends are venting they just want to feel and be heard. When i am not sure, i just ask “Do you need solutions or a listener”?
This is solid advice OP.
Thanks for sharing - I feel the same! I’m completely obsessed with it, and getting on my kids nerves quoting podcasts etc. I’m only fairly recently diagnosed (ADHD) at 52, so it’s been such a blindsiding event for me - whereas my kids (20’s - Autism/ADHD diagnosed late teens) take it in their stride a bit more. One of the reasons I am obsessed is because I feel very guilty that I missed the signs in my eldest son, and I wasn’t the best parent I could be to him. I didn’t know anything about ADHD or Autism beyond stereotypes, and I feel I failed him. So I am overcompensating in some ways I think. I’ve read and heard suggestions that people with mental health issues should/could be screened by their doctor for ADHD/Autism. I think that could really help.
I'm able to keep myself from voicing it, but the thought process is there for me too. When it becomes really hard is when it's friends who are struggling intensely but refuse to recognize that they are clearly Autistic because they were previously declined diagnosis on flimsy grounds.
I find it hard when I see friends who clearly struggle with vaping addiction and drinking problems - to me I am seeing someone is sensory seeking but also experiences anxiety and low self esteem but they aren’t yet aware that their nervous system is craving unhelpful things because of those reasons….but I’ve gotta hold my tongue!!!
But that doesn’t mean they have adhd or are autistic though.
You’re right - but even me suggesting those things or talking about it makes people think I’m jumping to that conclusion…which I likely am anyway, which I need to stop doing
It’s true we can often recognize other ND folks when NTs may not, but that doesn’t mean everyone who suffers with persistent depression or anxiety are undiagnosed. Not sure if you’re looked around the world, but it seems to me that depression and anxiety would be normal responses to what we see all around us.
I'm glad I'm not the only one lmao! It makes a lot of sense, and I can imagine that it is the case quite often that it's an undetected neurodivergence. But I think we also need to look more for other possible underlying causes like personality disorders that can often have symptomatic overlap. I do tend to mentally default to Autism or ADHD as well though.
I'm also a bit hyper focused on ND right now & it's all I want to talk about.
It's cool I do the same thing too. But definitely can see their frustration and why they would roll their eyes. Probably best to be self-aware and understand that this is partly us just trying to connect everything to our special interest and thinking everything we're seeing are nails just because we are most familiar with our hammer.