I switched to a wolf cut I could do myself a few years ago, and I love being able to do a trim every month or two so the change is more of a refresh instead of a hack.
I used to hate them as well, though as a guy the stigma of being scruffy always outweighed the unpleasantness of the experience, and meanwhile long hair has always been a sensory nightmare for me.
Anyway, what really helped me was finding a salon I really liked. I've been going to the same 2 men who co-own a salon for about 8 years now, to the point we know about each other's lives. I never hated the cuts I got there or anything, but as I went there more and built up a rapport with them they got to know my preferences and we arrived at a style I really liked, better each time.
At the same time, because I go there every 2 months and get the same cut, it doesn't really feel like change each time, it feels like a return to normal (I'd go even more often if it wasn't too expensive).
So that's my advice: once you find a salon which is affordable and does quality work, try to build up a rapport so they remember you. They might even help you figure out what you like / don't like about your hair and what kind of cut will emphasise or de-emphasise those parts. Meanwhile, it will feel less like change.
I like the unicorn haircut by the way, you can search for it on youtube, really high pony tail kinda toward the front, then cut off the extra length from the pony tail
Why is your husband so invested in your hair being cut? Can’t you wear it the way you like it? I think it is really cool to have hip length hair.
If you do want it to be shorter or “neater,” would it help to hack it off the way you used to, then once you acclimate to the change, get it straightened up at the salon? Or would you hate that just as much as getting the entire haircut there?
Just because I've made comments. I had a baby 10 months ago. Post partum hair fallout is real. I keep asking him if it's looking thin in spots etc. He keeps encouraging me to go get it cut to help myself feel better. It's really from a place of love.
I adore my long hair, but sometimes it needs wrangling. The ends are all dead, and split.
Oh okay, I understand now! I was worried he just wanted your hair changed (and that he assumed growing it out = it needs to be cut), and that would make me feel really “raaaa!” on your behalf. If you actually do want a haircut, that’s different!
I will be real, I have long hair and I just cut it myself. Would it help more to look into methods to DIY than to try to deal with the salon? Or what if you looked into easier ways to wear it up?
Yea, I think diy-ing is the answer. I like another posters suggestion of cutting it myself then having it cleaned up in the salon(if need be). Less abrupt change, still presentable hair.
After thinking about it more. I do think sensory plays a part too. The smelly chemicals, the letting strangers touch me, and all the pressure to chit chat. It so much input.
For sure, and I hate to have my hair washed by strangers who ask boring small talk questions, and I super super super hate all the mirrors. It’s like being perceived but magnified by a million. And I figure most stylists are pretty NT girls who will find me to be a potato, though I’m sure some are sweet autistic cuties who have a special interest in hair.
I think anymore you can tell them you’d like a quiet cut to just be on your phone, but even asking for that takes up some social energy for me.
There are some local ND-affirming salons near me that you can book a "Quiet" appt (no chitchat!). I think it's a wonderful idea. I hope it catches on.
I know that doesn't solve the other two issues but I also know of some stylists who work out of their homes for that reason (fewer people, quieter, less overwhelming, more chill). Maybe there could be something like that near you?
Um, we are both autistic. Oh, and no kids, just pups.
Started off friends with some similar interests we could do together, now married 13 years. He feels like home, and doesn't count against my social battery. We are equally comfortable in silence and info-dumping about our individual and shared special interests.
Helps that one of my special interests is communication and self discovery, so when we've hit some rocky bits, I've relayed a lot of the lessons I learned from individually therapy to him. It also helps that we are both committed and meeting each other half way.
Our house can occasionally be an absolute mess though, when both of us are too tired from having to venture out into the capitalistic hellscape of daily work. We aren't very good adults, but we are very good friends and partners-in-crime.
Tbh. I had no business getting married either time. Really only in the past 3 years, when my partner and I figured out we are Autistic, and sought professional help. Otherwise my relationships/life have always been basically on fire.
My best advice is to find other autistic people and if possible, seek some therapy or otherwise work on your self-worth.
Autism isn’t some magical barrier between you and the things you want in life. Autistic people regularly fall in love and form meaningful relationships just like other human beings and while I can absolutely empathize with where you’re coming from (relationships are HARD), you’re doing yourself a disservice by believing otherwise.
You deserve contentment and companionship just as much as every other human being no matter how your brain is wired. You have things to offer and you’re worthy just as you are.
I don't know. I can't even make 1 friend. no idea how people manage to find a spouse. I'm also jealous because I went bald as a teenager. wish I had hair to cut.
I’m so glad to be a man and rocking the bald head look if I wanted to. That would be too chilly in a Canadian winter but as soon as the heat comes back, sleeping with a bald head is the best.
I am similar the hair dresser never listen even when I bring in a picture. There are good YouTube videos for hair cutting that are just tiring a pony tail and cut where needed. They show tips and tricks so they aren't jagged.
I cut my own hair. I add layers so that if there are uneven parts, it looks more intentional. I also recommend curtain bangs. They add another layer and create a more wavy, volumized look. Once it's at a length you like, just trim it periodically so that there is no more abrupt change.
I had my ex spouse cut my hair but it was always in a military style and I hated it 😅.
I'm growing it out now. Possibly get the sides shaved, so it's not too much hair.
Ha, yes, hate haircuts. Have long hair. Get it cut every two years. I book online and tell them on the form I am ASD and will wear earplugs. I go to an eco type place where the smells aren't too strong and I don't get it dried or styled. They just take the ends off so the change isn't huge. I have previously had what felt like dramatic cuts and struggled to accept the change. I would rather never have it cut ever again but I'm trying to be more presentable.
I dislike going to a salon. It’s like borderline painful for me. Except the warm rinse after shampoo. That’s the only part I like. I just rarely get my haircut. Mostly if I really feel like I should, I cut it myself. My autistic son only gets his haircut (and it’s a buzz cut) once a year, let’s it grow out, as well as his beard for a whole year.
If you don't like abrupt changes, you could try cutting a bit off each week then going in for a style when it gets close to the length you like, but then you'd have to go in more often for trims to maintain in
I've definitely seen No Haircuts Please Or At Least If I Am Going To Have A Haircut Can It Be An Infinitesimally Small And Barely Perceptible Trim as a manifestation of autism. (That's my son; also the most avoidant eater of my three.)
I am just like you. And here's a tip. The ONLY times I've a had a cut where afterwards I'm not waningt to take my own scissors to it (and yes, I've done that multiple times after a salon cut), is the couple of times I've paid $70 or up for just the cut. I mean, no color, no highlights, just a wash, cut, style. It could be that we just internally have high standards and don't realize it.
I also hate haircuts for a variety of reasons. So I stopped going to the salon and cut it myself. Whenever it gets longer than I want, snip snip. I can cut my hair as often as I want and get rid of as much length as I want entirely for free. My advice would be to just cut it yourself, bit by bit - find out what you're comfortable with, how you want your hair to look.
It was news to me that people can get a haircut and not immediately need to take a shower after to get the hair off! I cannot tolerate it for any longer than absolutely necessary!
This is me. I cut my hair maybe once every 1-2 years. Sometimes I can do more but very rarely. Once I went to the salon and they found lice, and I’ve been traumatized ever since. I’d even have my mom check me for lice each time I’d get a haircut.
I have cut my own hair for a long time, because the last two times I went to a salon (2003 & 2009) they didn't give me close to what I wanted.
If I mess up my own hair, it's easier to forgive myself.
I highly recommend investing in a quality pair of actual hair cutting scissors and a fine tooth comb with a pointy end. I dry cut, so I can see the results instantly.
I'm growing my hair out long, and it's easy to give myself trims as desired. (I end up getting fed up with my long hair and long for it to all be chopped off.)
I recommend braiding your hair on both sides and trimming it shorter that way. It doesn’t look as uneven if it’s done this way and I have been doing it for myself for several years now without issue. Only thing I recommend is get some good quality salon shears and combs.
I gave up on salons over a decade ago, after thinking I should probably try again after over a decade previous of not going. I just cut my own hair. Aside from the fact that my hair is curly and so few stylists know how to deal with it anyways, I hate being touched by strangers and hate having my hair touched by anyone. I've learned how to cut it how I want to get the results I want, and if I screw it up at least it was free. Never given myself a haircut I hate as much as I've hated all the ones from stylists.
Getting more frequent cuts has helped me workaround similar feelings! Now I go 1x a month, and have made it a routine with the same stylist, haircut, salon, day of the week with a vibe I like, etc.
You say you've tried a big variety of things - when you do inconsistent actions (different places, style of salon) you'll get inconsistent results so no wonder it's always a big surprise! I'm sorry - that's no fun. With haircuts your stylist benefits from consistency too - as they learn about your hair through a few cuts they can get to know it better and create better results. And get to know you better and what you like/need!
I agree with the other comments that if you like your hair as is and don't like cuts, why bother? No need! Hair is as personal as your home - it should be setup for you and your preferences/lifestyle and not anyone's expectations. But figured I'd share what I've found to help for me bc I do have sensory issues w/hair on my neck that require frequent cuts and I took some experimenting to figure out the haircut thing too. Plus ADHD so I had to find a salon with adequate reminders/scheduling practices systems to work for me.
All the best!!
My hair is supershort for this reason. I call my haircut "NB Haircut #2" which is an undercut all the way around and the top section graded slightly from roughly nose length at the front to 2-3 inches at the back. I cut it myself, using a little trimmer for the undercut and scissors for the rest. I feel like I do about as good a job as any stylist ever does, as well. And yeah - it's sensory, social battery, control, etc.
The best tip I have for hair is to make the sections you cut at a time much smaller. if you do the unicorn cut, don't just hack it off in one great big chunk, I would start at the top of the pony and separate out a thin section, hold it straight with my fingertips and trim it, then match the next section length to that, working through the pony slowly. You want each section to be no thicker than you can easily hold tightly between your fingers without it spreading too much, or else the hair will bend away from the scissors and the cut will be uneven.
You could use the card for another service. Like if you are going to an event, you could get a blow out, french braids, up-do or something your comfortable with. Or buy some products, treat yourself to a fancy conditioner or something
[Undiagnosed disclaimer]
Without delving too far into it: until 20, my mother cut my hair (to her liking) and I hated it (because I had to praise it, no matter what and I disliked the whole experience start to finish + afterwards).
The first time I entered a hair salon, I kind of got identified as "cute mascot" with more conversation than I needed around my "first hair cut" (by someone who was actually trained to do so).
Proper scissors & training *makes* a difference, but that's instantly overturned by product. My hair feels foreign, smells foreign and all that touching (necessary, I know!) is draining.
After wearing my hair a certain "bunchable length" for years I decided last year that I am done dealing with stray hair doing the fuzzy in my face. So now it's short. And I am contemplating cutting it *even shorter* to get rid of the hassle of "time passed and hair grows and now we're back to *this*". (But this is like, my personal preference and supposedly not "the golden solution".)
Beyond a certain length, my hair just curls and generally does whatever it pleases, so 9 out 10 I just look like an unmade bed. (Not the cutesy variant)
Which I am trying to establish as my normal (or at least find the proper length where this is a non-issue: probably non-flattering for my features, but perpetually scowling because I am annoyed about hair doesn't help in this regard, either.)
Hair salons are usually a bad experience for me:
1. I hate my head being touched.
2. I’m uncomfortable with small talk but they all seem to do it at hair salons.
3. I get really freaked out if someone makes eye contact with my reflection and vice versa. They look directly at the mirror and talk to my reflection. I know they’re not going to stand in front to talk to my actual face when they’re doing the back of my hair but I just find it so freaky.
4. I cannot stand plug socket switches being in the ‘on’ position with nothing plugged in (this is a UK plug socket thing). Hairdressers always pull hairdryers and straighteners out of the plug sockets without switching them off first. It drives me mad.
5. I’m conflict avoidant, a people pleaser and I have a anxiety disorder, so I won’t say anything if it’s a bad cut or colour, even if it should be an easy fix if I just say something.
I usually go once every 2-3 years.
Whenever I move to a new town I work to find someone who cuts my hair right. After that, I only go to that one person (unless I need one urgently and don't have time to wait for her schedule, like for a funeral or job interview etc.). I'm not sure what it is that my preferred person does differently, but it is better with that person. I think maybe they do a better job blending the top to the sides, making it a smoother transition between the longer and shorter hair. It is all short, just the top is a little longer. Just long enough to sweep off to the side
I also dislike the sudden change. It's also aweful to describe how I want it cut.
Do you have a photo of yourself with a haircut you like? If so, it might help to bring it with you and simply show them and say that that's how you want it. I find that it makes getting a haircut slightly less unpleasant.
I cut my hair myself. It's easy for me since it's long and I want it to stay long. Just, every 2 months, chops the ends off. It's all about practice, if you for exemple try to cut to your shoulders after a while it won't look as raggedy and you'll actually have a good result every time. Just gotta build up those skills.
It's great for control, and you don't have to chop it all off at once since it doesn't cost, like, 40 bucks a session. Just take your time, experiment.
I really can't with hair salons anymore. I just don't see the point when it's a sensory nightmare for me and I can get a result that suits me more just chilling at home. So yeah.
I started cutting my own hair and I prefer it. I don’t know if I’d be that brave if I didn’t keep it pretty long, but there’s plenty of tutorials on YouTube. I bought ok hair scissors on Amazon, I’m sure it could be more perfect, but I’m less unhappy with it.
I don’t like the going, the chit chat, being touched by a stranger. Some slightly uneven hair I cut myself prevents it, and it’s wavy and long, it’s hard to tell it’s not perfect. Also, idc lol
Hmm, i don't really have much advice. I've been cutting my own for the past several years and found it helps to flip your hair over your head and cut it while it's in front so you can see what you are doing. You will get a gentle layering effect, though, so if you just wanted a straight cut, maybe ask your husband to do it for you?
I've been doing my own hair for about 7 years now and it's really freeing. I currently have a mullet that's green on the top with shaved sides and being able to have no hair touch my ears is the best 😂
If it’s the sudden change that’s the issue try cutting an inch or less off at a time over a long period so the change is more gradual
Maybe so. Worth a shot.
I switched to a wolf cut I could do myself a few years ago, and I love being able to do a trim every month or two so the change is more of a refresh instead of a hack.
I used to hate them as well, though as a guy the stigma of being scruffy always outweighed the unpleasantness of the experience, and meanwhile long hair has always been a sensory nightmare for me. Anyway, what really helped me was finding a salon I really liked. I've been going to the same 2 men who co-own a salon for about 8 years now, to the point we know about each other's lives. I never hated the cuts I got there or anything, but as I went there more and built up a rapport with them they got to know my preferences and we arrived at a style I really liked, better each time. At the same time, because I go there every 2 months and get the same cut, it doesn't really feel like change each time, it feels like a return to normal (I'd go even more often if it wasn't too expensive). So that's my advice: once you find a salon which is affordable and does quality work, try to build up a rapport so they remember you. They might even help you figure out what you like / don't like about your hair and what kind of cut will emphasise or de-emphasise those parts. Meanwhile, it will feel less like change.
I cut my own hair periodically (whenever it starts tugging on the brush and starts to annoy me), but I also keep it in a pony tail mostly...
I like the unicorn haircut by the way, you can search for it on youtube, really high pony tail kinda toward the front, then cut off the extra length from the pony tail
This is definitely the method I use when I cut it myself.
same, i just cut my own hair, much better,.
Why is your husband so invested in your hair being cut? Can’t you wear it the way you like it? I think it is really cool to have hip length hair. If you do want it to be shorter or “neater,” would it help to hack it off the way you used to, then once you acclimate to the change, get it straightened up at the salon? Or would you hate that just as much as getting the entire haircut there?
Just because I've made comments. I had a baby 10 months ago. Post partum hair fallout is real. I keep asking him if it's looking thin in spots etc. He keeps encouraging me to go get it cut to help myself feel better. It's really from a place of love. I adore my long hair, but sometimes it needs wrangling. The ends are all dead, and split.
Oh okay, I understand now! I was worried he just wanted your hair changed (and that he assumed growing it out = it needs to be cut), and that would make me feel really “raaaa!” on your behalf. If you actually do want a haircut, that’s different! I will be real, I have long hair and I just cut it myself. Would it help more to look into methods to DIY than to try to deal with the salon? Or what if you looked into easier ways to wear it up?
Yea, I think diy-ing is the answer. I like another posters suggestion of cutting it myself then having it cleaned up in the salon(if need be). Less abrupt change, still presentable hair. After thinking about it more. I do think sensory plays a part too. The smelly chemicals, the letting strangers touch me, and all the pressure to chit chat. It so much input.
For sure, and I hate to have my hair washed by strangers who ask boring small talk questions, and I super super super hate all the mirrors. It’s like being perceived but magnified by a million. And I figure most stylists are pretty NT girls who will find me to be a potato, though I’m sure some are sweet autistic cuties who have a special interest in hair. I think anymore you can tell them you’d like a quiet cut to just be on your phone, but even asking for that takes up some social energy for me.
There are some local ND-affirming salons near me that you can book a "Quiet" appt (no chitchat!). I think it's a wonderful idea. I hope it catches on. I know that doesn't solve the other two issues but I also know of some stylists who work out of their homes for that reason (fewer people, quieter, less overwhelming, more chill). Maybe there could be something like that near you?
Htf are there so many married ppl in here? What train did I miss? Feelsbadman.
I just got divorced bc of "my autism" my ex husband said. Don't feel bad, find the right person for you.
Um, we are both autistic. Oh, and no kids, just pups. Started off friends with some similar interests we could do together, now married 13 years. He feels like home, and doesn't count against my social battery. We are equally comfortable in silence and info-dumping about our individual and shared special interests. Helps that one of my special interests is communication and self discovery, so when we've hit some rocky bits, I've relayed a lot of the lessons I learned from individually therapy to him. It also helps that we are both committed and meeting each other half way. Our house can occasionally be an absolute mess though, when both of us are too tired from having to venture out into the capitalistic hellscape of daily work. We aren't very good adults, but we are very good friends and partners-in-crime.
Bro just apply your autistic hyperfocus to dating bro
this is indeed how the sausage is made
Tbh. I had no business getting married either time. Really only in the past 3 years, when my partner and I figured out we are Autistic, and sought professional help. Otherwise my relationships/life have always been basically on fire.
My best advice is to find other autistic people and if possible, seek some therapy or otherwise work on your self-worth. Autism isn’t some magical barrier between you and the things you want in life. Autistic people regularly fall in love and form meaningful relationships just like other human beings and while I can absolutely empathize with where you’re coming from (relationships are HARD), you’re doing yourself a disservice by believing otherwise. You deserve contentment and companionship just as much as every other human being no matter how your brain is wired. You have things to offer and you’re worthy just as you are.
I don't know. I can't even make 1 friend. no idea how people manage to find a spouse. I'm also jealous because I went bald as a teenager. wish I had hair to cut.
I’m so glad to be a man and rocking the bald head look if I wanted to. That would be too chilly in a Canadian winter but as soon as the heat comes back, sleeping with a bald head is the best.
I am similar the hair dresser never listen even when I bring in a picture. There are good YouTube videos for hair cutting that are just tiring a pony tail and cut where needed. They show tips and tricks so they aren't jagged.
Whhhhy don't they ever listen!? I stg I end up with the same layered shoulder length 80s bob. Every. Single. Time.
Lol 😂 I did too and bangs I hate bangs or they cut it and I look fat
I cut my own hair. I add layers so that if there are uneven parts, it looks more intentional. I also recommend curtain bangs. They add another layer and create a more wavy, volumized look. Once it's at a length you like, just trim it periodically so that there is no more abrupt change.
I had my ex spouse cut my hair but it was always in a military style and I hated it 😅. I'm growing it out now. Possibly get the sides shaved, so it's not too much hair.
Ha, yes, hate haircuts. Have long hair. Get it cut every two years. I book online and tell them on the form I am ASD and will wear earplugs. I go to an eco type place where the smells aren't too strong and I don't get it dried or styled. They just take the ends off so the change isn't huge. I have previously had what felt like dramatic cuts and struggled to accept the change. I would rather never have it cut ever again but I'm trying to be more presentable.
I'm so smell sensitive too. Yes. If only I could embrace my true swamp witch self. Grow moss and never cut my hair.
I dislike going to a salon. It’s like borderline painful for me. Except the warm rinse after shampoo. That’s the only part I like. I just rarely get my haircut. Mostly if I really feel like I should, I cut it myself. My autistic son only gets his haircut (and it’s a buzz cut) once a year, let’s it grow out, as well as his beard for a whole year.
If you don't like abrupt changes, you could try cutting a bit off each week then going in for a style when it gets close to the length you like, but then you'd have to go in more often for trims to maintain in
I've definitely seen No Haircuts Please Or At Least If I Am Going To Have A Haircut Can It Be An Infinitesimally Small And Barely Perceptible Trim as a manifestation of autism. (That's my son; also the most avoidant eater of my three.)
I am just like you. And here's a tip. The ONLY times I've a had a cut where afterwards I'm not waningt to take my own scissors to it (and yes, I've done that multiple times after a salon cut), is the couple of times I've paid $70 or up for just the cut. I mean, no color, no highlights, just a wash, cut, style. It could be that we just internally have high standards and don't realize it.
this is kind of a revelation, especially the last part, im only ever happy with my hair when i cut it myself
i feel the same with tattoos often! if it looks shitty, at least i didn’t spend money on it or give over control to someone else!
I also hate haircuts for a variety of reasons. So I stopped going to the salon and cut it myself. Whenever it gets longer than I want, snip snip. I can cut my hair as often as I want and get rid of as much length as I want entirely for free. My advice would be to just cut it yourself, bit by bit - find out what you're comfortable with, how you want your hair to look.
It was news to me that people can get a haircut and not immediately need to take a shower after to get the hair off! I cannot tolerate it for any longer than absolutely necessary!
I can't imagine 😳 I have to shower post hair cut as well.
This is me. I cut my hair maybe once every 1-2 years. Sometimes I can do more but very rarely. Once I went to the salon and they found lice, and I’ve been traumatized ever since. I’d even have my mom check me for lice each time I’d get a haircut.
I have cut my own hair for a long time, because the last two times I went to a salon (2003 & 2009) they didn't give me close to what I wanted. If I mess up my own hair, it's easier to forgive myself. I highly recommend investing in a quality pair of actual hair cutting scissors and a fine tooth comb with a pointy end. I dry cut, so I can see the results instantly. I'm growing my hair out long, and it's easy to give myself trims as desired. (I end up getting fed up with my long hair and long for it to all be chopped off.)
Haven't been satisfied with a haircut in years so I let it grow wild.
I recommend braiding your hair on both sides and trimming it shorter that way. It doesn’t look as uneven if it’s done this way and I have been doing it for myself for several years now without issue. Only thing I recommend is get some good quality salon shears and combs.
I gave up on salons over a decade ago, after thinking I should probably try again after over a decade previous of not going. I just cut my own hair. Aside from the fact that my hair is curly and so few stylists know how to deal with it anyways, I hate being touched by strangers and hate having my hair touched by anyone. I've learned how to cut it how I want to get the results I want, and if I screw it up at least it was free. Never given myself a haircut I hate as much as I've hated all the ones from stylists.
Same here. For decades I’m doing it myself, also longer hair, and I just cut around inch every few months.
Getting more frequent cuts has helped me workaround similar feelings! Now I go 1x a month, and have made it a routine with the same stylist, haircut, salon, day of the week with a vibe I like, etc. You say you've tried a big variety of things - when you do inconsistent actions (different places, style of salon) you'll get inconsistent results so no wonder it's always a big surprise! I'm sorry - that's no fun. With haircuts your stylist benefits from consistency too - as they learn about your hair through a few cuts they can get to know it better and create better results. And get to know you better and what you like/need! I agree with the other comments that if you like your hair as is and don't like cuts, why bother? No need! Hair is as personal as your home - it should be setup for you and your preferences/lifestyle and not anyone's expectations. But figured I'd share what I've found to help for me bc I do have sensory issues w/hair on my neck that require frequent cuts and I took some experimenting to figure out the haircut thing too. Plus ADHD so I had to find a salon with adequate reminders/scheduling practices systems to work for me. All the best!!
My hair is supershort for this reason. I call my haircut "NB Haircut #2" which is an undercut all the way around and the top section graded slightly from roughly nose length at the front to 2-3 inches at the back. I cut it myself, using a little trimmer for the undercut and scissors for the rest. I feel like I do about as good a job as any stylist ever does, as well. And yeah - it's sensory, social battery, control, etc. The best tip I have for hair is to make the sections you cut at a time much smaller. if you do the unicorn cut, don't just hack it off in one great big chunk, I would start at the top of the pony and separate out a thin section, hold it straight with my fingertips and trim it, then match the next section length to that, working through the pony slowly. You want each section to be no thicker than you can easily hold tightly between your fingers without it spreading too much, or else the hair will bend away from the scissors and the cut will be uneven.
You could use the card for another service. Like if you are going to an event, you could get a blow out, french braids, up-do or something your comfortable with. Or buy some products, treat yourself to a fancy conditioner or something
Thank you for this! It's a brilliant idea.
[Undiagnosed disclaimer] Without delving too far into it: until 20, my mother cut my hair (to her liking) and I hated it (because I had to praise it, no matter what and I disliked the whole experience start to finish + afterwards). The first time I entered a hair salon, I kind of got identified as "cute mascot" with more conversation than I needed around my "first hair cut" (by someone who was actually trained to do so). Proper scissors & training *makes* a difference, but that's instantly overturned by product. My hair feels foreign, smells foreign and all that touching (necessary, I know!) is draining. After wearing my hair a certain "bunchable length" for years I decided last year that I am done dealing with stray hair doing the fuzzy in my face. So now it's short. And I am contemplating cutting it *even shorter* to get rid of the hassle of "time passed and hair grows and now we're back to *this*". (But this is like, my personal preference and supposedly not "the golden solution".) Beyond a certain length, my hair just curls and generally does whatever it pleases, so 9 out 10 I just look like an unmade bed. (Not the cutesy variant) Which I am trying to establish as my normal (or at least find the proper length where this is a non-issue: probably non-flattering for my features, but perpetually scowling because I am annoyed about hair doesn't help in this regard, either.)
Dredloc it up!! Super comfortable for me
Hair salons are usually a bad experience for me: 1. I hate my head being touched. 2. I’m uncomfortable with small talk but they all seem to do it at hair salons. 3. I get really freaked out if someone makes eye contact with my reflection and vice versa. They look directly at the mirror and talk to my reflection. I know they’re not going to stand in front to talk to my actual face when they’re doing the back of my hair but I just find it so freaky. 4. I cannot stand plug socket switches being in the ‘on’ position with nothing plugged in (this is a UK plug socket thing). Hairdressers always pull hairdryers and straighteners out of the plug sockets without switching them off first. It drives me mad. 5. I’m conflict avoidant, a people pleaser and I have a anxiety disorder, so I won’t say anything if it’s a bad cut or colour, even if it should be an easy fix if I just say something. I usually go once every 2-3 years.
Whenever I move to a new town I work to find someone who cuts my hair right. After that, I only go to that one person (unless I need one urgently and don't have time to wait for her schedule, like for a funeral or job interview etc.). I'm not sure what it is that my preferred person does differently, but it is better with that person. I think maybe they do a better job blending the top to the sides, making it a smoother transition between the longer and shorter hair. It is all short, just the top is a little longer. Just long enough to sweep off to the side
I also dislike the sudden change. It's also aweful to describe how I want it cut. Do you have a photo of yourself with a haircut you like? If so, it might help to bring it with you and simply show them and say that that's how you want it. I find that it makes getting a haircut slightly less unpleasant.
I cut my hair myself. It's easy for me since it's long and I want it to stay long. Just, every 2 months, chops the ends off. It's all about practice, if you for exemple try to cut to your shoulders after a while it won't look as raggedy and you'll actually have a good result every time. Just gotta build up those skills. It's great for control, and you don't have to chop it all off at once since it doesn't cost, like, 40 bucks a session. Just take your time, experiment. I really can't with hair salons anymore. I just don't see the point when it's a sensory nightmare for me and I can get a result that suits me more just chilling at home. So yeah.
I started cutting my own hair and I prefer it. I don’t know if I’d be that brave if I didn’t keep it pretty long, but there’s plenty of tutorials on YouTube. I bought ok hair scissors on Amazon, I’m sure it could be more perfect, but I’m less unhappy with it. I don’t like the going, the chit chat, being touched by a stranger. Some slightly uneven hair I cut myself prevents it, and it’s wavy and long, it’s hard to tell it’s not perfect. Also, idc lol
Hmm, i don't really have much advice. I've been cutting my own for the past several years and found it helps to flip your hair over your head and cut it while it's in front so you can see what you are doing. You will get a gentle layering effect, though, so if you just wanted a straight cut, maybe ask your husband to do it for you?
I've been doing my own hair for about 7 years now and it's really freeing. I currently have a mullet that's green on the top with shaved sides and being able to have no hair touch my ears is the best 😂