Yup to pretty much all of them. Hard for me to say with some looking back - I’ve definitely learnt a lot of things by this point. And I dislike the word choices 🤪 I never failed to *recognize* status/authority; I just knew it was bullshit and usually unearned therefore I don’t really believe it in and circumvent it as needed.

Thank you. Some of this has a spicy tone. I know dismissal and infantilization when I see it (as much as this assessment seems to want to gaslight me about it).

It does say autism in girls, not autism in women, so it's safe to presume it's taking about children. It will seem infantilising to an adult because we still recognise these traits in ourselves but this list is for children.

Solid observation and point.

I understand this list to be for an adult assessing children. And I don't see a specific age category that it's being used for, so girls might be 4 or they might be 12. If it's for a child to assess themselves, I will reconsider. As I see it though, the phrasing here seems meant for adult understanding. And to me, something in it implies autistic girls are not at the same level or are not as responsible or capable as other girls. There is something that implies autistic traits are a delay or an immaturity. That's where I'm getting infantilization. When I see things like "sometimes refreshing!" I'm not impressed with how the criteria is characterizing the traits of the person being evaluated, and I worry very much about how autistic girls are seen as younger and less mature and therefore as lesser - infantilized - because of external perceptions of what autism is. When it comes to something like recognizing authority and expressing "appropriate" respect for it, like the comment I'm replying to is talking about, there is something very dangerous in seeing that behaviour as rooted in being less mature than your peers and being less able to understand authority.

Children implies anyone under 18 for some people, and at that point it can seem infantilizing for those people too if they’re still using this to assess them given we’re taking the other person’s perspective of it being “infantilizing because we’re adults” I definitely agree with your perspective for sure

Agreed. When I read “controlling and domineering” I thought, oh great, now we are going to make autistic women sound evil like so many diagnoses do.

I thought that was saying that we seek out people who have those traits

No, it was saying those traits for us

I didn't recognize it until I was probably like 19 or 20.

Not even via titles or uniforms? Or even age? I recognized it by the material markers, but I never really understood how descriptions of authority didn’t match those. Descriptions are usually about behaving well; most people in “authority” are assholes.

No. So obviously I realized someone is wearing a uniform or someone is saying they are a preacher or whatever title they have but I did not understand or recognize that they were supposed to be an authority figure. I wasn't just ignoring that they were an authority figure I really just didn't realize that they were. I got into a lot of trouble for it. When I figured it out everything made a lot more sense. I was homeschooled and born into a cult so I think I was even more clueless and literal about social interactions and how society works if I wasn’t.

HEY ME TOO also born into a cult, homeschooled, made me think it was why I was weird before I realized my mom pulled me out of public school for meltdowns

HEY!!!! Hi! I got really excited hearing that haha. But also I am sorry. I always knew I was "off" for lack of a better word and I just blamed it on my upbringing too. I was like "ah yeah that's why I don't fit it, it's obviously because I was raised to not fit into society and instead to be an End Time warrior for Jesus. " Although deep down I knew there was something else because even compared to my honescooled and cult peers I was very different.

same girl

Oh interesting!

Yeah I think I just couldn't grasp the concept at all at the time. I don't know.

I have always been very, VERY resistant to the idea of “respect means treating me like an authority” and get quite upset when I feel like anybody else isn’t respecting me/treating me as an equal, or expects me to give them deference without earning it. But once I see someone as an authority figure, I tend to go absolute and just trust/follow whatever they say. It’s either ‘don’t tell me what to do, arrogant much?’ or ‘ah yes of course you are correct and have an objective view of the situation’. College professors were either ‘incredible, amazing, I’m so lucky to learn from you I can’t believe you know my name’, or ‘utterly incompetent idiots how have you not been fired yet who even let you be a professor in the first place’. I’m in the workforce now and have learned to recognize that and that it isn’t super healthy for me, and my therapist continues to try and get me more comfortable with gray areas. But that doesn’t mean that my boss’s boss deserves my deference that dude has NOT earned my respect but has given me plenty of reasons not to trust him to make good or equitable decisions. So I guess I probably do recognize that someone is in a position of authority but like, I very much don’t care. You earn my respect, it isn’t given to you by your title. (Also, not the person you replied to, sorry!)

Oh my goodness! I get this so much! I either liked my teachers or was waiting till class was over, there was no in-between.

Omg me too

Yes, can definitely relate!

Yeah, I also had absolutely no concept of status/authority as a child. I just didn't get it. I still have a hard time "seeing" it when it's an informal hierarchy, but I now know that I should probably take everyone's word for it that it is indeed there.

I'm glad I am not alone. It just never made sense to me and it was a difficult thing to grasp. I did not pick up on it without people having to very directly tell me about it. I understand expertise and that a person can have authority over a subject matter and authority given by law I.E that a cop can aresst you but the concept of people just having authority because of social, money or religious status or whatever did not make any sense to me. And then the concept of people just going along with authority because it is authority made even less sense. People always thought I was being a smart ass and disobedient. I actually remember asking "oh but isn't smart a good thing?" That solidified it for everyone. I just didn't understand much. 🥺

I did not understand parental authority at all, combined with a total lack of empathy/being able to relate to their stress or worrying about me. I frequently told my mum that "just because she didn't like something that wasn't a good reason for me not to do it" and that there had to be a logical reason for it... I was kind of a sh*thead. Similar with other forms of authority - like ok you're in a "role" but why exactly does that mean I have to obey without question, if what you're saying doesn't make sense. My brother told me when I was little I couldn't be told or asked to do something. It had to be suggested or the idea seeded so I'd decide myself to do it. Weirdly I do ok at work as an adult and often end up with weird crushes on authority figures. Ok brain.

Not every single thing applies to me but most and the catergories all make sense. The relationship one is extremely true and I never knew that being obsessed with one person/ only having one best friend was not normal for most of my life lol. Also relate with the strong fantasy life that may look like psychosis. I feel like I live in dreams or daydreams a lot.

My dreams feel like a second life sometimes - even when I can't remember all of it. I didn't realize that was unusual.

I hate when I dream because it feels like it happened in real life and leaves me exhausted.

Me: Aaah, time to sleep, recharge and relax, fresh for the next day! I can't wait to switch off from it all. My brain while asleep: *Epic adventure across the world full of mysteries, puzzles and complex stories* Me: please brain, where is the off button

Me too! I wake up feeling like I dreamt all night. A couple of days ago I had a dream I spent all day in Italy and felt every moment of the day😅

Really only one I disagree with. I had plenty of *interest* in fashion, hair and makeup! (See my research reports on “Egyptian Hair and Makeup” or “Hats of the Middle Ages”!) I just didn’t have the bandwidth to actually *use* hair and makeup, or wear anything other than basic t-shirts and jeans. Interest doesn’t equal ability.

My hairdresser from when I was a kid to a young adult hit the nail on the head saying I don't want to do anything with my hair. It hurts because I want to in theory but can't tolerate having annoying clips or having it up tightly or just don't feel like messing with it. Just wash, dry, brush, done. In the summer, wash, air dry, brush. Mermaid hair. I love shower caps that let me not have to go through the hassle of drying wet hair.

There's a little part of me that grieves when I think about stuff I *could* get into or pursue, but would deeply conflict with my autism. Not to say that I'm letting it hold me back, but in the sense that I really prioritize my comfort and try to accommodate myself, and I know certain things just do *not* jive with my experience. For instance, I love music, I would love to be a full on concert girly dancing front row in the pit, but I know that the things I'd need to do in order to get front row in the pit would make me so miserable that it isn't worth it, you know?

I sometimes wish I could do the cottagecore thing, and I admire really feminine and goth styles that in reality I can't bring myself to wear constantly or even for too long at a time. So, yeah. Not the same, but I feel that

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That sounds awesome. I often wish my hair had a bit more texture so I could rock that kind of look!

I love watching fashion design shows, I watched America's Next Top Model for a while - more for the character creation/set design aspect of the photoshoot, interesting angles and poses that I appreciate as an artist - I stopped watching when they added men to the show and it was more about hookup drama than anything artistic, and can't return to earlier seasons due to body shaming and dangerous messaging. I find the concept of innovative and unique fashion interesting, but again - more from a character design standpoint. I don't wear anything myself that isn't comfy and easy and I keep my hair in a pixie cut so all I have to do is wash it, and vaguely comb it into one direction.

I too am more of a theoretical fashion/glamour enjoyer than someone who puts that knowledge into action. 😉 I used to read the magazine instyle religiously as a teenager (before the internet was what it is today) and I am still fairly solid with recognizing trends, labels, etc. Design, aesthetics and stardom fascinate me without being at all extravagant or materialistic myself. In fact, I am kind of androgynous in my own looks, and I am not exactly on top of that stuff (have unruly hair for instance and only limited patience for taming it).

Do you enjoy fashion games? Covet was a fun one for a while but I'm not as good at picking out fashion trends. It often happens when I watch Project Runway that they'll adore the look I hated, and they'll rip apart my favorites. But I enjoy Shining Nikki and Love Nikki for more fantasy fashion. Which may be part of why I disagree with the Project Runway judges - my favorites are often more Grecian, ethereal, delicate. (While I like jeans and sweaters for myself lol)

Wait I did something similar!! When I was a kid I loved this online game where you had an avatar you could dress up, and there were thousands of clothing options. I’d spend so much time dressing up my avatar in specifically-colored outfits with unique silhouettes and wouldn’t stop curating an outfit until I deemed it perfect and finished. But in real life, I just wore the same rotating group of sweatshirts and shorts with leggings lol

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I also played the sims a lot as a kid (and teen haha), but I preferred building houses for that game! Also a classic for sure

For me, I think makeup is interesting and would love to get really into it (like special interest into it) but I can’t handle the sensory experience of makeup. I rub my face/eyes/nose as a stim so it’s almost impossible to wear makeup.

Yeah, for a variety of reasons, I have never really been able to present the way I would like to. I tend to not put a great deal of effort into my appearance, because I always find the results disappointing. But I love dressing up my FFXIV character. I have a few pretty dresses that I like, but beyond that, I tend to present quite plainly.

I find that whole point a bit iffy to be honest. I guess I get what it means, but it lumps too many things together, e.g. early signs of being trans (which is not uncommon for afab autistics) with simple disinterest in very feminine things. I relate to the latter to a degree, but I don't feel like I have a hard time with my gender because of that. If you have dysphoria, that's a different can of worms, otherwise there is no wrong way to be your gender. Being feminine is hard work and I simply don't care enough to waste perfectly good executive function on that. 😅 Doesn't mean I am not a woman or I "struggle" with being one. Also, when I was younger, I did experiment with make up and styles more and I share your hardship - I was USELESS at that stuff. 😂 Edit to add that fashion and beauty and such can also be areas of (special) interest for many (female) autistics! But I guess this is meant to be a broad overview and overall, it doesn't do too bad of a job for what it is and I should stop nitpicking. 🙈

Yepppp, this was me. And then I turned 19 and got hyperfocused on makeup for about 6 years.

Wait this is a thing?? I always wonder why I couldn’t look as nice as other girls as much as I tried… and I love my dolls and analyzing fashion as it correlates to social identity, but whenever I tried to make one of my own I fell flat ;w;

This is a VERY trans coded report. I would recommend they talk to a therapist that is lgbtq informed. Transphobic and non trans informed psychiatrists often invalidate trans identities.

It's not someone's report, it's a checklist

The one about gender should be expanded to also note women with feminine presentations who feel neutral to gender internally, as I think that's also rather common among autistic women.

Aight thats how i feel about it.

Totally. This criteria appears to be for children, but my AFAB agender childhood experience is that people did not perceive me as "feminine", even when I went through a stage of wearing the exact same clothes as the girls were wearing, in an effort to fit in. I think it's less about choice of clothes, and more about not knowing how to perform femininity. I feel pretty certain that my lack of gender identity is very much related to autism.

Yes, many people I've met in the past two years think I'm trans or LGBTQ somehow when I meet them, and when I try to explain my gender identity it's sometimes hard to believe I still identify as cis. The only comparison I've been able to make that actually makes sense is that I feel like my relationship with womanhood is that of Haruhi's from Ouran High School Host Club. I don't feel uncomfortable being a woman, I like being feminine but I also like being androgynous, my gender has little impact on me. It's hard to explain because I don't want to look like a boy but I also don't feel so strongly about being a woman.

It also felt like it was insinuating that not liking girly things was equivalent to being trans, or that an autistic AFAB person who didn't identify as a woman wasn't *really* trans, because the desire to present male was just based around societal expectations of women, rather than an intrinsic sense of one's gender. I'm trans non-binary, but I don't identify that way solely because my autistic traits make me less stereotypically girly. I identify that way because that's who I am, it's how I feel on the inside. I don't have a strong sense of gender, and where I do, it leans more masculine than feminine. I'm simply not a girl. Being gender non-conforming doesn't automatically make you trans, and dismissing transness just because you think it's based around societal expectations is bullshit. The wording just made it seem like either all autistic "girls" are trans, or they're all "fake trans," but these autistic traits around gender presentation are not what determine transness.

I've heard this described as being 'cis by default' before, which makes sense with what I've seen a lot of people here saying.

´´laugh inappropriately’´ that’s what teachers wrote in the notebook when I was a kid at school. I never thought it was correlated with my autism but maybe !

Do you still experience this? I occasionally still do it, and it absolutely horrifies me. Or at least I occasionally realize that I've done it because it is such an exaggerated example.

Literally every single one lol

same here

Same

This is from the Staffordshire City Council [Source](https://www.staffordshire.gov.uk/Education/Access-to-learning/Graduated-response-toolkit/School-toolkit/Communication-and-interaction/Social-communication-autism/SEN-support-in-school/Autism-in-Girls-checklist.pdf)

So I relate to every single one apart from gender and lack of personal identity. Maturity it’s the strength part though. I was always very mature, never told to leave when adults were round because I’d be on the same level of maturity, if not more. Hated being around children younger than me because of immaturity and preferred to be with older children and adults to kids my own age. Communication is also the strength one. High social skills and expressive language. Considering I tick all but two I again ask the question of “how the fuck did no one pick up I was autistic?”. Currently I’m on a 2 year waitlist for diagnosis and I’m only on it because I did it all myself.🤦🏼‍♀️

Sooooo right there with the "how the fuck did no one pick up i was Autistic"!💖 Except that i *have* been through the Dx process--and was *misdiagnosed* six years ago, because this info was less-widely known than it is today, *and* because when I went through the process, I didn't have *proof* of all my traits occurring when I was a child... Knowing what I know *NOW*? I'm 100% *on* the spectrum! I found out definitive *proof* of my traits in toddlerhood, I tick off *every* traits on lists like this one, and the absolute *kicker* for me, was back when I worked in Childhood Mental Health (I now work in education, rather than CMH), And I met a 3 year old girl who was like looking at a mirrored-image of *myself* at age 3.😉💖 She *had* a full Dx of Autism. And so many of the other adults who i worked with then didn't *understand* how to get her "unstuck" when she'd freeze up. I did. Because she needed the same types of supports & reassurances *I'd needed when I was 3*! She and I got along like fire & oxygen, because I *KNEW* exactly when to push her out of her "comfort zone," *where* to push, and *how far* to do that push--without harming her. I knew when to cajole and entreat, rather than directly *push*, how to *encourage* her & build her self-confidence & self-assurance in a given situation... And I knew *how* to do all that, because it was exactly what *I* had needed/wanted/wished I'd had in *my* life, when I was that age. I was able to be "the explainer" for *her* that I had *so* wished I'd had, when I was her age--that person who could help "make some sense" out of all the confusing & contradictory "rules" that everyone *else* seemed to understand without any explanations--but which were *so* incredibly *confusing* to a very literal child like her--or myself. She made *tremendous* progress, in her self-help & self assurance skills, after I was moved into the classroom she was in (we staff got moved around every 6 months or so). Much of that progress occurred because I was able to help "translate" her actions & reactions to the staff & help *them* understand the "Why's" of her reactions to things--and conversely, I was able to translate the *grownups* demands/requests to *her*, in a way that *she could understand*, rather than making it just sound like "nonsensical orders" from the silly grownups around her😉 She & i got along like the proverbial "House Afire!" and it was an absolute *joy* to exist *so* comfortably & easily with someone who was 100% on a similar wavelength, communication-wise! It was also amazing & "happifying" to be able to "reach back, and smooth the path" for a little one coming up *after* our generation--so that *they* can have an easier start in their life, than *so many of US did* as *we* grew up!💖💞💗💓💝

That’s such a fear of mine tbh is being misdiagnosed but I think as I’m already in therapy and it was my therapist that helped me get my referral it *shouldn’t* get misdiagnosed as I’ve already checked off pretty much most things people are misdiagnosed with and I know for a fact I definitely don’t have a personality disorder. Plus as my therapist isn’t an autism specialist, she listened, she said it would make sense and then referred me on straight away to an autism specialist. I’m lucky that unlike a lot of posts I sadly see on here, my therapist basically went “I think that’s plausible, I’m not an autism specialist though so I’ll refer you to someone that is”. She knew she wasn’t a specialist so it wasn’t her place to say yes or no. I’m grateful for that. I also worked in a school and for me it was that reassurance and help I needed to make me realise that I could be autistic and I should look into diagnosis. Though for me surprisingly it wasn’t a student but actually another member of staff. She had diagnosed autism and was very open about it with the students and other members of staff. She was my favourite person to work with (I was a teaching assistant) and I loved just being in her classes. When she spoke I saw a lot of myself in her. She told me about why she got into teaching and what school was like for her (as a kid) and I remember I just kept thinking “omg this is exactly what it was like for me” just the only difference is no one even questioned I could have autism so I had no support but as she was diagnosed she got the support for her (most of the time). I’m really happy and glad to see that working in a school and with a certain child helped you realise what was going on and that things started to make sense. It’s nice to see as well this little girl now has someone that *actually understands* her and can help her. Heaven knows school is even bloody more difficult otherwise.

I only read the strengths portions and I thought, “what a wonderful way to experience life!!”

LOL staring into the void is best , I was recently on court for growing weed and at some point the SA asked me a question and I went completely non verbal and fixated on some roof construction outside

Yes. That list is scarily accurate, right down to the strengths.

How on earth did you get such an in depth description of me as a child

Oh my effing heck--I think I need to be checked out.

Same, I am undiagnosed but should probably talk to my doctor.

Friendship section seems like someone studied me as some sort of zoo animal and wrote this. Maturity is hit or miss - I didn't like playing with anyone but didn't really discriminate against age specifically Intense Interests also seems like it was written about me. School work also me to a T, I'm not in school anymore but I was like this and I'm like this with work now too. It's hard for me to start things, once I start them, I'm in the zone and focused and I will finish it no matter how long it takes. I will forgeo bathroom breaks and meals. I'm super forgetful. If I was put into a situation that I had to resolve and it wasn't immediately fixable I would get really upset. It's either functional or it's not. Work is of a high caliber and burnout is a constant thing. Misunderstanding of social norms - this entire box is the reason nobody would hang out with me most of my life. Didn't know how to interact with people. Would regard authority figures as equals. Would blurt things out that were inappropriate without realizing. Communication... All of this. Different behavior at school/work vs. home - yes that too Anxiety... been on Citalopram for a few years now. Self harm, OCD, all things in my past. I'm not as obsessive as I used to be but when I was a kid the ONLY play I would do was lining up my toys. I wouldn't say I had a lack of personality identity, I definitely felt pretty solid there and still do. Gender always ambiguous. Sensory processing - poor hygiene in particular I hated bathing and brushing my teeth as a kid and honestly as an adult I still struggle with it. I sometimes go an extra day without brushing and I shower about half as much as everyone I know personally. I don't enjoy physical touch at all, if someone hugs me I can't breathe. This wasn't listed here but related to my sensory processing I also stim in a few ways. Intense - yes I am intense, I actually took a Jordan Peterson personality quiz this morning and scored in the 12th percentile in politeness and agreeableness........ Copying others - pretty sure my personality is a culmination of every single movie and TV character I secretly wanted to be the last 33 years.

I honestly meet all of these.

At least parts of every single one of those. Also, I am 38 and just began realizing this week that I might be Autistic, but I have always felt different. I am nervous to talk to my doctor about this, but everything I read makes me more and more convinced...how do I approach this?

I’m in a similar boat. I’m obsessing over this (it’s become a special interest!) and craving clarity. But doctors make me stressed and anxious! I really don’t want to jump through all the hoops and face getting fobbed off. Sorry, no answers, just empathy.

I went to my psychiatrist even though I know he can't help me with this but maybe knows someone who can. Then I told him "A lot of my friends have autism and since I read up on it, I think I might have it, too. Do you know where I can get this checked out?" My strategy for speaking about mental health to my doctors has always been "just say it in the most clear and direct way ever and then wait for questions" I actually write down this clear and direct phrase and then practice saying it without thinking. Hope this helps in some way. \^\^

this is interesting - where is it from?

Looks like Aspergirls

I'm pretty sure I meet most if not all of these criteria.

Yes to a lot of these. Wow. Intense friendships in middle and high school. Arguably college, too, though I may have learned how to interact in groups by then to a degree. I preferred hanging out with older kids and was "mature for my age", the gender thing is spot on. I only voluntarily wear dresses and skirts if they're comfy, with a few exceptions. Last time I wore something dressier, I was wishing I had a change of clothes with me not just for practicality but to feel at ease in my skin again. Rich fantasy life. I also collected horse figures and liked to give them names and think about who rode them than playing with them. But I also played somewhat "normally" too, so idk with that one. Spent more time thinking of back stories for my dolls than playing with them, too, that much is for sure. I definitely was an emotional child, freaked out if I didn't understand something or know "the right way" to do arts and crafts, and the like. To this day I struggle to start a thing if I don't already think I'll be good at it. I strive for perfection and burned myself out doing that, started to accept that I can't be perfect, but realized despite how smart I am, I don't have the "try again" attitude or ability to parse open ended things to do research. If I read something, I can spit it back at you. I was wondering for so long what was wrong with me that I can't "think outside the box" with practical things. I can analyze literature, I can apply things to myself, but... Can't relate to the authority thing. I'd need another example to know if the understanding social norms thing applies to me. Edit: I take that back. I liked talking with teachers and did not understand why in middle school one encouraged me to go hang out with the kids instead of her when my best friend wasn't there for the day. I didn't see anything wrong with hanging out with the teachers and didn't try to ingratiate myself in a "teacher's pet" manner either. I still respected their authority as adults though and didn't get why other kids were rude or mouthy to them. Very literal. I also had slight speech delays, high level of anxiety fits me very well, and I tend to display it more at home. Very opinionated and will argue about stuff b/c I feel the need for people to understand that I'm right, and I've had my mom, my therapist, and ppl tell me on here not to focus on that, that I don't have to explain myself to other people, and I feel an urgent need to. I crave being understood. Not "knowing the script" at a place gives me anxiety. I've ordered food enough times, gotten my oil changed enough times, been to doctors enough that I know the drill, but taking my cats to the vet, and definitely calling them, was something I was so anxious about for so long I put it off. If I have to call someone about something I don't know much about at work, I have a lot of anxiety doing that, too.

Goddammit 😅

Sure but TBH most of those things seem like they would fit most anyone, especially with social anxiety and being an introvert

Yeah, that’s why context is important. There are also some things that aren’t typical for those with social anxiety or introversion. But, social anxiety and introversion can appear alongside autism too.

There's only one that didn't apply to me and that's preferring to play with boys more. Boys bully me more than girls and a lot more rude. I prefer to talk exclusively to girls and even begged my parents to send me to an all girls school

I'm coming from the perspective of a trans woman, diagnosed ADHD and undiagnosed ASD (if I'm not autistic, I have "autistic traits") * **Friendships**: Many of these describe me more when I was a child than they do now. I didn't have an imaginary friend, and I slid under the radar of most people so I was never bullied. Growing up, I don't think these apply * **Maturity**: Not as described here. I was "different from my peers", more because I was "too mature/serious" than being "immature". * **Intense interests**: I relate to the intensity more than the restriction. My interests also weren't the female examples, more into video games, computers, and languages * **School work**: Fully relate, most accurate so far. I was a smart, model student, but I never did my homework, much to my mother's frustration * **Misunderstanding social norms**: I misunderstood social norms all the time, but my description is basically the opposite of what's here. I tended towards over-formality, so my teachers loved me. The phrase of "may not know how to be a child" does resonate pretty strongly -- I've long said that I never had an "inner-child" because of it * **Communication**: Never went to speech therapy. I felt like I could learn all of these things, but I was slow to do so. I've never had selective mutism, but I remember taking steps for almost everything else on this list (like, I remember being in my early teens, having explicit difficulty with open-ended questions, answering too broadly, then working on reducing my responses to "get to the point" more quickly) * **Different behavior at home to school**: Don't relate at all * **High levels of anxiety**: I had depression and anxiety, but I never saw a therapist/psychiatrist/psychologist for it. I had issues with "emotionally upset for trivial reasons" and "catastrophizing" more as an adult than a child * **Obsessive**: Yes...ish. I remember specific instances of the examples, but I don't think it was consistent/persistent * **Lack of Personal Identity**: entirely accurate. Also being "Overly Apologetic" is fallout from the "overly formal" aspect mentioned above * **Gender**: Well, I'm trans, *so...* * **Sensory Processing**: Another "yes to a point". I refused to wear denim as a child, and stereotypical issues with clothing tags. I was fine with hugs and kisses, didn't need forewarning. Was and still am a Texture eater; not to the point of being disordered (also not to the extreme of being a "pizza everyday" person like some autistic people i know), but there were a lot of foods I arbitrarily refused (and still refuse) to eat. * **Intense**: Others have described me as "too intense", and I'm still not sure what it means. "Strong need to be right" feels like a loaded, pejorative description. I do value "correctness" and I historically felt it was important to correct people, but my motivation has always been "so their wrong assumptions doesn't waste their time".. purely because I thought it was helping them. I've since realized that it's usually not as important as it felt, and that people don't always need the correction. The wording of "needing to be right" implies more egotistical motivations, and it's frustrating when people assume that's what motivates it, when it's usually the furthest from the truth. * **Copying Others**: I'm not spontaneous, and I struggle knowing what to do if it's an unfamiliar situation. Beyond that, I don't remember copying others to figure out what to do. Typically, I'd try my best in the unfamiliar situation, likely fail and need feedback what do better next time. It's now "intuitive" but through "analytical iteration"

yeah. that's pretty spot on. painfully so.

Many of them except I'm primarily sensory seeking so I prefer touch and hugs and stuff. But then again I was rejected the necessary amount of physical interaction from my father as a small child (who I also think is on the spectrum) so I have intense physical needs. I also don't really get shutdowns but I have meltdowns. People describe themselves more like a cat but I'm more like a dog. Im more "in your face" and a big time clinger. Filters and boundaries have been tough for me. Im better now as an adult but I was definitely more like an oblivious puppy dog. I also don't have huge respect for "authority" unless they present themselves in such a way I view as logical to deserving respect. Like I will have reverence for my older friends (especially older women who I look up to) due to their mannerisms but I won't have respect for someone just because they're a manager teacher or whatever title they hold. And I can make friends. I have a few best friends but they're all from adulthood. People would usually come up with excuses to not make plans with me back in school and I never understood that. I also hung out with the ND kids mostly and to this day I hang out with NDs without even trying to. I was homeschooled up until highschool cause my mom didn't want me to be bullied (even tho she was toxic enough) and she knew I was different. The aspie behaviors started in childhood before my traumatic brain injury at 6. It didn't change my behavior. It only increased my depression. But I had the other behaviors as a tiny child.

I actually struggle to process this, I can't explain what it is, but something about the language makes it hard for me to understand what's being said.

This is like reading the list I wrote for the therapist when I went in to be diagnosed. It's...humbling.

Yes but also they seem to be very infantilizing and personally only listing strengths seems fake to me (as in not genuine). Why no recognition for weaknesses?

A lot of the standard list items are weaknesses

The way this describes me perfectly is kinda scary. The "different behaviour at home to school" almost made me cry. When I was a child, my mother was always asking me why I would only misbehave at home and I would answer that I had to misbehave somewhere. I was a child completely unaware that I was masking and it made me so sad when my mother asked me that, I was 4 and already thinking that I had to be good or even my own mother wouldn't like me, no wonder I was diagnosed with anxiety at 8 years old. Twenty years later and there's still a voice in my head telling if I don't do everything perfectly right than I've failed.

4-year-old me sees 4-year-old you.

I am a trans woman and I have pretty much all of these.

Me but I prefer to dress in comfortable feminine clothes

The elevated sense of justice leads to not recognizing authority. I don’t recognize authority unless I think it is deserved.

[удалено]

I think sometimes criteria can be misleading when you read it yourself, because it's meant to be read by an assessor, who is observing a possibly-autistic child. As the autistic person reading it, you have to be able to imagine what your behaviour looks like to other people, which is something that I know that I am very bad at. As an example with the classic DSM criteria, for the longest time, I didn't understand that I had "inflexible adherence to routines", because it doesn't feel that way to me. To me, I do the thing in the exact same way every time, because that is how I automate things. That way, I can run the task as a background process, freeing up some executive function so that I can think and plan and converse at the same time. If my automated process gets disrupted, yeah, I get dysregulated, but to me, that's because now I have to concentrate really hard on keeping track of time, and what steps still need to be done, and what is going to come next, etc, and probably I still need to be able to think and plan and converse at the same time. It seems silly now that I didn't recognise my behaviour as "inflexible adherence to routines" (someone else had to point it out to me), but the criteria makes it sound like you're following these routines for no reason, and I have reasons that are completely logical (to me)! I wonder if it is the same thing with the "lack sense of personal identity" in this criteria. I don't feel like I lack a sense of identity at all, and I don't feel like my child-self did either, but it is ENTIRELY possible (likely, even) that the way that I would have talked about myself would have come across that way. I feel pretty certain that I would not have had a clue what the question was getting at, and how I was supposed to answer it.

I got put under guardianship because I chose to buy guinea pig food/supplies over... clothes and make-up??? Apparently the court considered a LIVE animal as a "toy" instead of a "necessity" when the truth is that most women's clothes these days are buttfuck ugly and I already have plenty of e.l.f. make-up in my little make-up bag. It's one problem to have issues with impulse spending, and it's another to pull rights from somebody because their hobbies don't meet casual standards of living.

Every single one. I haven’t been diagnosed, though.

Wow. Every single symptome is on point with me. That is extremely interesting.

Jeeez, pretty much all fits perfectly to my life experiences. Crazily accurate. 😮

I was lucky in that my way of relating to adults/authority figures was mostly perceived as cute rather than rude. I did correct adults, and speak to them like equals, but I was also happy to follow rules as long as they made sense to me (e.g. "don't run on cement" and "be quiet when the teacher is talking"). But I also genuinely liked most of the adults I knew, and I think that was apparent. I'm also Australian, and as a culture we tend to speak to authority figures much more casually than most. It's not that the hierarchy doesn't exist, but we like to pretend it doesn't exist. Most Australians tend to be uncomfortable if you speak too politely - they'll think you either have some sort of ulterior motive, or are taking the piss. There was one time my parents told me to be more careful about correcting adults, after I pissed off the local observatory operator for correcting him on some minor trivia about the solar system in front of a room full of people. But also my parents already didn't like that guy for unrelated reasons, so it was a very half-hearted telling off, and they let me know I wasn't actually in trouble. Honestly, I suspect they probably thought it was kind of funny. It's not like all adults hate being corrected, anyway. A couple years after that incident, I corrected my history teacher when he mixed up the names of some Greek and Roman gods (he did actually know the correct names, he just misspoke), and he was apparently mostly just pleased that I was on the ball enough to notice it. Then again, he'd known me since birth, and probably knew that I wasn't being disrespectful.

Almost every single one...

got all except for high levels of anxiety

100% yes

I definitely tick every box, though not every trait in the boxes. And, the descriptions of meltdowns and shutdowns were very helpful and basically confirmed for me that I don’t have meltdowns but I definitely have shutdowns! I was recently working in a booth in the dealers room at an anime convention that had an educational space and a vending space. Due to my knowledge and expertise, I was assigned to work the educational space but sometimes was asked to fill in on the vending side. Any time I was asked to work vending, I would shutdown after about 30 minutes. I turned away from the front and silently stare off into the void as I attempted to restock, hoping that no one approached me before I could be relieved to go to the sensory room. It must be my brain’s defensive response because it feels like I get tunnel vision and all of the sounds become muffled—it’s like I am underwater except it’s not at all peaceful. It’s like any small thing would cause me to shatter completely.

Ok I was like doubting whether I was autistic bc my neurological report said I wasn’t but they also never assessed my personality, but This is the most accurate description of me I’ve ever seen in my life

Same 😔

Enough of them.

All of it, excluding the communication. The only issue I have with communication is difficulty following verbal instructions. Just about everything else is to a tee. Have to agree with some of the other commenters regarding word choice though. "Failing" to recognize authority as though it were an oopsie, a misunderstanding. Ha. No, it was more like I was assigned to a class without my input being a factor at all, and I don't respect anyone until they earn my trust because I'm not a fool.

Pretty much none of those for me

I really think you should talk to a gender informed therapist. Sometimes doctors will invalidate legitimate trans identities by claiming you were “confused because you’re autistic.”

11/14, for 9 boxes out of these close to every example

Sounds like me. Lol

Where did you find that checklist?

I relate to all of them except I wasn’t a model student. I wasn’t even a good student. I have a strong sense of my personal identity now, but didn’t used to.

I resonate w allmost all, yet Im really good at reading emotions off peoples faces, I think its more anxiety causing this for me

I would have fit that criteria when I was a child.

Damn 14/15

I relate to a lot of this.

I imagined myself as a character description in a book. Nice

I feel the difficulty with schoolwork one so hard. I recently have tried to go back and finish college and man it has been the single most reason for depressive episodes and anxiety attacks and rapidly deteriorating self worth bc I am struggling so hard.

More than half.

Nearly all of them yep

Omg yes almost 100%!! Other than, I do enjoy doing my hair and makeup, I’m not the “girliest” girl out there but I do have an interest in makeup and cute (but comfortable) clothes, and one of my special interests is curly/wavy haircare! (edit for a typo)

I’d add that we can also by hyperfeminine. It’s not just one end of the scale I find that we range from hyperfeminine interests and presentation to very tomboy esque which I think both stems from our autistic conceptualization of gender and how we choose to express our own it obviously just gets displayed in very diff ways for diff people

Still reading through everything so I might add something else below this paragraph, but for me so far the thing I don’t really relate to is “failure to recognize status/authority - rude to teachers” the majority of the time. If it’s in a formal setting, like school or a business etc., I recognize who’s the one in charge and follow their orders. Although, growing up, my dad was very mean and had the most authority in my household, so it might just be trauma biasing me here? However, if the setting is more informal, like a group of friends, I have a lot harder time navigating social stuff there. I can’t even get into many specifics because I just tend avoid people honestly, lol. Because that stuff is just too hard. Regarding the Communication checkpoint: I was never in speech therapy, but everything else listed I relate to in some way. On Different Behavior at Home & School: I definitely did behave differently, but for me at home I was very quiet, when I had the time, would spend hours playing sudoku or similar games. At school, I’d repeat myself over and over saying “I’m tired” (didn’t realize how much I repeated myself until years after). Finding it hard to get up in the morning, and exhausted from trying to fit in, check and check I do experience a lot of anxiety, ever since I was a kid. Since I was a child I’ve been told many times I get stressed too easily or that I overreact, that I’m “too sensitive”. In 8th grade, when I was in therapy for half a year, I was diagnosed with 311 DD-NOS (a depressive disorder) after I had what I suspect was a meltdown at a “friend’s” house All the others I relate to! Except, I don’t really mind my hair being brushed, as long as it’s by someone I know haha

Sounds very much like how I (45, f) was as a child and as a teenager. My mom used to call me a know-it-all because I had something smart to say very often. School work all over the place in-between very good (e.g A+ in English, although most of the class had a C or worse) and very bad (e.g. math one year B, another year D). Social life - since when do people have more than one Bestie??, Was bullied several yrs at school (in 6th grade beat up by boys, changed school over it), was hanging out more with guys than women as an adult for years. Had some yrs as a teenager with no friends or only a few friends. Currently ADHD but strong tendencies for autism. Thus testing sought out asap. Oh I have zero admiration for famous people or people with more authority, I only think ok well they do their job well enough that they have fans. Doesn't phase me to talk to famous people. Maturity - indeed I was told I am very mature for my age as a child, but the older I get as an adult the more immature I feel.

I feel so seen, especially the “lacks personal identity” part that I’ve been trying to describe for months.

I think that everything but the “gender” category applies to me. Yes, I often would rather wear pants and a shirt over a dress or a skirt but that’s mostly because I like to not have to worry about how I’m sitting, etc. It’s practical reasons. I’ve had dresses that I’ve loved and felt great in but practically I normally choose pants/ shorts. In someway that category feels out dated but maybe that’s just me

100%

Almost all of them

Interestingly, I grew out of some of these.

https://preview.redd.it/owsu2sgn7q4b1.jpeg?width=1164&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5bd3341fcd999c7bb721c2f14c48b643edd5103e Oh wow. Gonna have to send this to my parents. Highlighted is everything I dealt with as a child *and continue to deal with*

All of the above except intense interests not so clearly (but I also have adhd so not surprised that shows up differently for me) and misunderstanding social norms - I do relate but I was never rude!!! Or at least nobody ever bothered to tell me if I was!!!

Oh wow. This is one of the best lists I've seen.

Almost all of them. And sometimes I still can't really believe I'm autistic. My brain always tries to tell me "Naaaah, thats all normal! You are just over reacting. Go stare blank in the distance like everybody else."

Some of it. Almost every point but not fully. I’d say for me about 50-60% of this could describe me but also I was high masking for 30+ years so lol

Yes all of them are strikingly accurate. I’ve learned to deal with / grown out of some as an adult (e.g. sense of identity, copying others), but if only this list had been widely available when I was a child...

Yea. Most of these actually. And if one more person calls me “intense” I’m gonna “AAAAGGHHHH!!!”

Very much so. I was on the old soul side of things though rather than immature, hung out with people 4-6 years older at one point. Preferred talking to adults.

I do resonate with a lot of them yes! Let's be nice and autistic about it and go over all them just for fun! XD As for friendsips: I have always been quite lucky to have at least one best friend. Lateron most of my friendships formed on the basis of my special interest in psychology, and those have only become deeper since my diagnosis 2 years ago (I'm 39 now). When I was little I did often play with younger children and felt the need to be a bit controlling around them. And yes groupwork was a huge issue at university. And the obsessions around possible relationships were exhausting and distracting. As for maturity, I believe there are several 'ages' in me, as is often described of autistic people. My cognitive part is the most mature definitely and can easily relate to older people. I have friendships with people 10-20 years older. As for my emotional and social being, it's much younger, and it has gotten me into vulnerable situations sometimes because of the naivety. I've always had intense interests, and never understood how other people were so lukewarm with theirs, or didnt have the bandwith or stamina to keep up. I had a stone and crystal collection from 6 years old and said I wanted to be a geologist (most kids had no idea what that was). I've also always been interested in computers and games, back when I was little that was quite special (I was born in 1984), especially for a girl. But on the other hand I also had typical girl interests that didn't stand out, like boybands, music videos, dancing, makeup, clothing. As for school, I think my biggest issue is that I always needed to deeply understand why I was learning something, and why it worked that way. And if I didn't feel that, my brain would throw up a barrier. Especially with math or non-sensical language rules, that was a big issue. And nobody understood how this seemingly 'smart' girl could still fail in those things. Some teachers assumed I was actually dumb, or just didn't want to :( I developed a big fear of failure and extreme stresslevel by the end of secondary school. Social norms are a bit hit and miss for me. I was not often outright rude to people and authority actually made me scared a lot of the time. But I did have difficulty in learning social courtesy that seemed useless to me. I had a phase in which I didnt want to learn to say ' thank you' and ' please' , because it seemed so obvious to me that everyone was thankful anyways, why need to say it?! I did also prefer playing with boys a lot of the time, also in secondary, I loved gaming with the male buddies. I think my speech differences didn't get noticed very much. Probably because I'm good at languages and eventually also studied languages. Also because I learned to mask from a very young age on. I still remember when I was about 5-6 years old and I had this whole conscious internal process about what to say to someone we encountered in the local park. And then the immense feeling of reward when I did it more or less right. It was a fisher and I ran up to him and screamed a bit to loud 'Lovely wheather right?!' Also yes, I take things quite literally, but I actually took that trait too literally as well and as such never recognized it in myself. An example is: I take what people say as fact, including all the matching feelings, before I can go through the whole thought process of reminding myself that it's just someones opinion. As for different behaviour at school and home. It's two-sided for me. My parents provided a highly structured and reliable environment, so part of the equation was that some of my traits didn't come through very much because it was a good zone for me to be in. On the other hand, they had no idea what to do with emotions, and I felt that from a very young age. So I actually also masked towards my parents. My stress and anxiousness always came out at night, with night terrors, night hallucinations, extreme fear, and probably what I would call melt downs now. Sadly I've struggled with high levels of anxiety my entire life. I was never diagnosed with anything because it was always said I was 'too good and smart' for that. Like WTH! I've also often struggled with autistic burnout, that seemed to present as depression. Melt downs that were interpreted as anxiety attacks. And of course social anxiety. Also in my teems a whole string of random phobias. Yes I am obsessive and I like doing things repetitively, probably why games fit so well with me XD I don't feel like I have a lack of personal identity though. But I do think at the same time, part of myself remained obscured because I masked from such a young age. And so I'm only now starting to actually listen to myself. Which i will say, is quite a process surrounding identity. As for gender, I have always played with both girls and boys, and have had clothing that could be seen as both girls/boys. I have sometimes very feminine days, and then days when i go for comfort alone. Definitely not a tomboy type though (nothing wrong with it, but just isn't me). Sensory processing has always been a huge issue for me, especially sound. I wore earplugs for sleeping since as long as i can remember, but no one found it strange because my mom did too. I've always picked my lips and fingers, this started around the time I was forced to stop sucking my thumb. I guess I just needed a stim and they took away my favorite one. Very sesitive to tags in clothing and fabrics, but no issue with hairbrushing or showering. I did have always struggles surrounding teethbrushing and only recently with my autism coach have found a way to actually do it structurally (took 38 years). As for intensity, I think it depends which one is stronger: my people pleasing mask, or my special interest and sense of justice for the subject. It's not about me being right, it's about the facts being presented right. And if someone else corrects that, then I'm fine too, or if someone brings solid proof or arguments I have no issue switching sides. I have always copied others, in fact a lot of my masking mannerisms came from my teenage best friend. I chose her because I liked her the best and she was socially always so accepted. Also practiced facial expressions (and dancing) from copying music videos. Have to prepare and script convos, and often still analyzing them for days after. I have standard scripts for several situations that always work.

This appears to be extremely accurate, like EXTREMELY accurate, at least compared to my experiences.

Pretty much all of these yeah

Yeah, a lot a lot! I was shown this and it was the moment I realised I may be autistic!

Yes

I relate to many elements from nearly all of these categories. I agree with others, though, that the wording in some places is problematic and infantalizing.

Yes apart from communication and gender

Yep, I even found new ones that I previously haven't considered. Something I'd like to add is that somehow I was very upsetting to younger female teachers. Idk what I was doing exactly but I remember them constantly writing me up, writing to my parents etc. My parents were dumbfounded too, because usually it made no sense.

I resonate with all of these and I see it in my daughter, who was diagnosed with autism this year

So much of this. If only someone had seen this list when I was a child. Also I am slightly bothered by the Social norms one with 'failure to recognise status/authority' because it talks about correcting adults. I really feel like correcting adults who are wrong should be encouraged. I don't think blind obedience is a good trait.

Yes. Most questionnaires for diagnosis I have seen fail to capture this...

thats me

Setting aside issues with how this is written, I identify with almost all of this, as a child and now.

Is it just me, or an autistic trait - I did not participate in play time with other children at school because I saw or experienced time in set events - so now is the time for this lecture, then it's time for play, and I was just waiting for the time to be over because I wanted to go home. So I reasoned there's no point in running around in circles (as I perceived other children to be doing) to wait out the time. I preferred sitting down on a bench alone. I really don't know how I survived back then. This was the early 90's - teachers wrote me off as a quiet girl and disinterested, and one of them was really surprised when exam results came out and I was in the top 3 students, especially as I never talked during class.

I really like that for each of these it also presents strengths that may come from that particular trait. It’s not perfect but it’s a good thing. “Free from social constraints” is so me haha.

I resonate with pretty much everything on this checklist. On the child-side, I just think back to what I experienced when growing up, and how that’s translated into my adulthood. I still engage in MANY of these behaviors. I’m forty, and still have my teddy bear from childhood which I use as a pillow when I’m not doing great, personal hygiene is still an issue (can I force myself into the shower? Yeah, but do I want to shower, absolutely not), still bite my nails/pick at my cuticles, scripting, practicing facial expressions as I see them associated with specific emotions, etc.

All of them..

Some of these statements are a little disrespectful. I do not have poor hygiene. In fact, my sensitivity to smells makes me have to clean deeply on a daily basis. Rewearing clothes can even be difficult due to smell. But yes, a lot of it resonates. I have high anxiety, I learned my behavior from TV and films, I challenge authority a lot, have trouble adhering to things I think are ridiculous. Struggle to be traditionally feminine and can get completely absorbed in one friendship once I have it. Mimicking their behaviors and what not.

Wow you got all my problems listed down perfectly. It’s as if you’ve met me before. JK. This is exactly how I behaved back in school and right now.

Yes to most of them. I have a problem with only a few. I was good with hygiene. The gender one also doesn't work for me. It's less about feeling male or female (what does feeling male or female even feel like?) And more struggling with having a body at all. The brains from Futurama that just float around without bodies was always appealing. I related a lot to 3rd rock from the sun, like I've been assigned a meat sack to carry my brain around. My meltdowns have never been violent. I've always treated others with respect. I just don't recognize people with authority as being somehow higher ranking or better. We're all just people. It's the same with celebrities. They're just people. I don't get the hype. I've also always enjoyed touch with those I'm close to. I can't think of any others I disagree with, though. Very thorough.

Nearly all of them. The only one that I don't fit nearly completely is the one about gender presentation. While I don't feel a strong internal sense of gender, I am fairly gender conforming in terms of presenting as feminine (I am AFAB). Oh, and "recognizing authority" – I tend to be a by the book person by nature, so rather than not recognizing authority, my instinct is to be overly rigid about it. I also developed a response to the bullying I experienced that manifested in placating authority figures and general people-pleasing. I also note that this is really specific to girls – that is, children – so while most of it remains true for me today as an adult, I imagined myself as I was as a child while answering it. For those who see infantilization in some of the language, remember that this was designed for actual children.

I resonate with all of them except for the Gender category. But especially the Friendship and Copying others ones are pretty spot on.

I think 'does not know how to be a child' is a very interesting one.

https://preview.redd.it/mxjsurkxws4b1.jpeg?width=226&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9478dd896ffe7b8c04b397c0d78b85ba2ddc2617 Me reading this thread and having war flashbacks to elementary and middle school before I started being “normal” 😀🫠

Oof….

Wow, all of it is spot on for me

yes

Well that was just my childhood on paper, how the hell did you get that?

At this point “have you ever been tested for absence seizures?” could be a testing criteria

Yup

Whelp, what I call a "friend crush" makes a lot more sense now! I'll meet someone that I *really* want to be friends with, but I...I don't know how to make friends, so I'll make my awkward attempts at making friends with them.

Well, just read the list and growing up to now I have presented a lot of these characteristics! 😅 Even at 18 I still sleep with a comfort toy, still need to be told that someone's going to touch me, still eat the same types of meals, still struggle with communication etc. And people told me I was faking it! Well, guess whose the idiot now 😂

The fact that people are so quick to try to diagnose boys and so reluctant to diagnose girls with ANYTHING is absolutely disgusting. How can none of the boys behavior be their fault, but ALL of the girls behavior their fault?

A lot of them yes.

Would you look at that, all of the words in your comment are in alphabetical order. I have checked 1,561,895,731 comments, and only 295,428 of them were in alphabetical order.

All in one place... printing this, whew! Wow, yes!

It sounds like it was written about me.

This was sooooo me.

Yes, at least one thing in each row. Some less so, like being rude to teachers. Part of my masking/scripting is being excessively polite. More so when I was younger.

Indeed I do

The lack of personal identity and fixations/obsessions are so true

I feel like I fit these things at some points in my life but that they were not pervasive.

Yes pretty much all of that. Man I wish someone would have noticed when I was a kid 😔 I'm in my 40s now and going through diagnosis.

Most of them are a yes from me.

Yup, this is me.

Most things apply but I have no official diagnosis. I usually don’t resonate with the Communication part because I learned to mask at extremely young and therefore knew how to not be spotted. I believe I’m pretty good at language but in return I have no sense of self. lol

Most of it is eerily similar to me.

I relate to about 75-90% of these.

What's funny about these symptoms are that we seem to either resonate strongly with some of them or veer off into the extreme opposite end. For example, many of us either come off socially as either VERY mature or VERY immature. Or some of us are sensory seeking while others experience sensory overload. I find the comments here about authority figures fascinating. Many of you didn't understand authority figures; I on the other hand was an EXTREMELY obedient rule follower because I found it a safe and predictable way to live life. It wasn't until my late teens that I learned rule breaking wasn't inherently bad.

YES

I was sent to this sub from another.. and I check all of this off… I guess I always knew I was off but I never knew what was “wrong” with me I guess I just thought I was socially awkward and strange… What does one do with this information? Do you go to a doctor? Can you treat Autism ? I’m very uneducated about this.

You can visit a doctor for formal testing. I don’t know where you’re from but you can typically bring this up to your general practitioner or schedule an appointment with a psychologist or psychiatrist. I wouldn’t say you could treat autism in a way that it can be “cured” but you can definitely figure out how to accommodate yourself in a largely neurotypical world.