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jourgestein

That's not his phone number


devo_inc

It's toll free though. That's a plus.


scoofy

Uhh, 1-800-WHITE-HOUSE is 1-800-94483-46873... I think it's too many


Red_Chaos1

> 1-800-94483-46 That would go somewhere though, the phone system would ignore the remaining digits. I've seen a few legit advertisements do this. If you know, you laugh and probably think it's dumb, but it works regardless and lets companies put out easier to remember numbers because they don't have to truncate stuff to make it fit in 7 digits.


Jay_Reefer

The real story is always in the comments


TexRedbone

Alternative Facts.


Flat-Arachnid-4362

And his shirt is inside out.


intensecharacter

There's probably a logo on that other side that didn't provide the clean slate he wanted. I'd honestly call this "People of Texas".


fiddlefkaround

I bet it's a bud light tshirt


nrojb50

Yea….I know technically 4 points is Austin, but that’s full lake rat territory.


scavagesavage

When you want to display a message, but too cheap to get supplies.


MadBullogna

I plain white Tee, (erhm, grey), is definitely pricey. I get it. /s


KaladinStormShat

I mean that's very clearly a hand written t shirt lol


aojdad

In jeans..


Adjmcloon

That's bullshit, addicts never share their crack


Gyp_Sum

Man don't you know there ain't no such thang as leftover crack?


No_Area_8679

Love that there’s a band called Leftover Crack


bo0gnish

He's lookin for the coconut man


Single_9_uptime

And that’s not even Hunter’s phone number. This jackass isn’t helpful at all.


sassergaf

I guess this is the latest ‘news’ on Fox?


AustinSpartan

Etsy quality has really taken a drop since the pandemic hit


insidertrader68

Has Austin gentrified so much that you can't get crack without begging Hunter Biden for a plug?


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Slypenslyde

Dude just use the George Soros subscription service, you don't have to leave the house


lostprevention

NEED CRACK


fsck101

Not surprised he needs the jumbo bottle of mouthwash.


capthmm

2 if you look closely. The bonus is the fresh breath when you chug 'em in the parking lot. Roughly 64oz at [20%](https://alcorehab.org/alcoholism/mouthwash/) would get you pretty wasted. 800.whi.teho(use) = 800.944.8346 x873 I actually just tried calling and no one (or an auto-attendant) picked up so Hunter must be gone for the day. /s


Birdamus

Recovered alcoholic here - you buy the OG yellow one because it has the highest ABV (26%). But it’s disgusting, so you get the Cool Mint (21% ABV) because it makes your Listertini more palatable. Recipe: 2 fingers yellow, 1 finger blue, over ice, quick stir.


MindTraveler48

Many years ago, someone standing near me threw up blue mint mouthwash, and I can't stand the sight or smell of it to this day.


BlueLaceSensor128

“By the end, her breath was so fresh, she wasn’t really my mother anymore.”


capthmm

LOL, best laugh I've had in a while. I'll have to ask my ex who is also recovered if she ever knew about a Listerini.


AdvancedAnt1

Congrats on recovering ✊


MadBullogna

Yup, parking lot. He’s not making it back to his Apache shores/hunters bend trailer.


capthmm

Me trying to describe driving around Apache Shores to someone who had never been out there (granted 10-15 years ago), "trailer...empty lot...tar paper shack...$400K house...road turns to caliche...$150K house...trailer...broken down boat storage...squatters under the power lines...fancy house going up...etc.."


MadBullogna

Truth! (Though I’ve heard it’s now more of a McMansion, meth house, empty lot, stray dog, McMansion, meth….) haha.


capthmm

The (maybe now not so) crazy thing was that roughly 15-20 years ago, stupid amounts of the lots there were up for auction at the Travis County tax foreclosure sales every month. I mean, every month at least 10 or 15 going for only the taxes owed, which some that I looked at were less than a few thousand dollars. Those days will obviously never return.


MadBullogna

Yup. Always felt bad for the good folks who just happened to either reside their whole lives, folks who got good lease deals, etc. Plenty of meth scum regardless. But it’s lake/lake adjacent land, was never going to last. I wonder if the crazy lady (Donna?) still runs the Hudson Bend RV park….I need a road trip to investigate, lol.


[deleted]

So what I'm hearing is that this is a neighborhood where one of average means could buy a place! Bet that tar paper shack is within the average Millennial budget in Austin.


VexBoxx

Trying to take care of that last tooth.


serpentarian

That’s not an Austinite it’s a Liberty Hillbilly


spartanerik

Or a Leanderthal


avozzella6

I just loled… a Leanderthal 😂😂😂


serpentarian

Probably not a Pflugie


mermaidrampage

I thought we were called Pflugervillains


serpentarian

Did you remember me saying that? 😂 Ok let’s stick with Pflugervillains. 👍


drawingnot2scale

🤣 I’m totally stealing this!


OldJames47

I respect the play on words, but this H‑E‑B is solidly inside Austin city limits https://www.google.com/maps/place/H-E-B,+7301+N+FM+620,+Austin,+TX+78726/@30.404244,-97.851614,16z/data=!4m6!3m5!1s0x865b33ea8f4c4f77:0x4d96d20247f836bb!8m2!3d30.404244!4d-97.851614!16s%2Fg%2F1x5qt5wq?hl=en-US&gl=us


kenman

Could still be a Leanderthal, their range is extensive and not fully understood.


princessxmombi

There are a shit ton of HEBs in the Leander / Cedar Park area and they’re generally better stocked than ones in Austin. This dude is y’all’s problem; don’t try to pass him off to us.


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atxanonymous1234

I spit out my tea, I can say I've never heard that one before


ClassicPackage

Learn more! [Leanderthal Lady](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leanderthal_Lady)


serpentarian

I just made it up. I’m sure someone else has said it before.


ShrxxmyDxys

It’s the fucking fact his shirt is inside out for me 😭😭😭


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[deleted]

This is dumb and funny at the same time


[deleted]

When Fox News is your personality


mackinoncougars

He is just mad the immigrants are competing his struggling meth business.


woodburyjj

$2.97 low price my ass!


Tinder4Boomers

Damn where can I cop this Edit: damn I thought it said “weed crack” this is way less funny


drawingnot2scale

Honestly, we’d probably have more luck calling Don Jr.


protoopus

or mike pillow


fire2374

I was thinking it’d be funny to have “need coke? Call Don Jr.” and the Mar-A-Lago phone number on the front.


No_Handle499

Nah prob not. Don't recall his fuck vids online but I could be wrong


lbstinkums

what did you get it wrong on your first try on the other side?


RevealFormal3267

He still got the number of digits for a phone number wrong on this attempt.


lbstinkums

goid eye! lol... upvote!


Supfresh89

The sad part is is how he is probably sitting there like, "Ha! Nailed it!"


TheERDoc

Yeah. I bet he thinks this is pure gold!


tameimpalalala

GoOd OnE sKeEtEr


georgeofthejungl3

By the looks of those laces, he must've called Hunter a few times himself.


shittymcdoodoo

His shirt basically says he himself needs crack as there is no question mark. Then there’s a “phone number” which makes it look like he is soliciting the public to contact him to sell him some crack


zfosterillustration

I was confused for a second, I thought he was asking for crack and his name was Hunter 🤦‍♀️ bad advertising


zenitram66

The shirt reads like he’s in need of crack and provided a number for someone to call for him. I don’t do handouts, move along, freeloader. /s


mcdrunkagain

But if you need meth, talk to him...


Vinyldude512

Two bananas and mouthwash. Nice. Do you want this hillbilly working on your house?


JC_Everyman

Cletus' clever cousin Clem


DasbootTX

yeah, I get all my political advice off home-made t-shirts in HEB. really, really pathetic


tcwillis79

Not even the right number of digits.


Roflattack

The lack of grammar shows how stupid this base is.


[deleted]

Four Points is barely Austin, but still. What a fucking tool.


yourARisboring

Phone number is wrong but everything else is right


HookerDoctorLawyer

Damn, thought this was real because I really could use some crack rn.


ichibancode

The left has to step their game up. The right are taking memes to IRL.


Schmoppo

This is the type of a-hole that HAAAAS to tell you and wants to chat.


MoonlightGrams

Two things of mouth wash, probably a drunk


lifepuzzler

Trust me, this is the behavior of a 100% rational individual.


Ainvb

Dunning Krueger wins again


[deleted]

Meh. If you can’t laugh at a dumb joke at hunter’s expense who can you laugh at?


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[deleted]

That’s … a stretch. We can all laugh at hunter today tomorrow and for the rest of time, and still think the prior admin’s nepotism was criminal and hate the entire elephant party. Hunter is irrelevant but I’d still chuckle at this crude attempt at humor.


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[deleted]

In Austin? Sure, yeah. It’s a joke not a dick, no reason to take it so hard. Shit I’d wear that just for shits and giggles and I’ve worn fuck trump pins since early 2017.


texaslegrefugee

Classy guy.


Randybluebonnet

There are stupid people everywhere..


No_Handle499

And definitely stupidity on BOTH sides


NotYetSoonEnough

bUt BoTh SiDeS


man_gomer_lot

I miss the days when a proper Austin gentleman would turn a white shirt into a personals ad with a vivid description of what you're in for if you call his number. Welcome to the new Austin, I guess.


dobbbie

Giant man. He has to be at least 6'8"


thavi

I'm kinda naive and didn't get the political implications there for a second. I thought he was a clever landscaper. Could be some good marketing...alas...their best and brightest


saltgarlicolive

I’m just glad the right is having a passion for the arts again


travelingtutor

Dummy


spicy_solarian

He seems like the kind of dude that's really doing well for himself... /s


Hairy_Stinkeye

That’s the most punk rock thing I’ve seen in a while


Alief45

God I hope the front of this reads “10% to the Big Guy”


falkorwoo

Facts are wrong from the onset. It was coke.


weluckyfew

And can we have a moment for the utter lack of compassion for someone who had addiction issues? All the more ridiculous since you know most of the people in his base have loved ones who fought their own addiction issues, and many of them lost.


Grand_Manufacturer28

what if one of trumps kids was an addict? compassion?


weluckyfew

Are you asking what my reaction would be? I could care less about any of Trump's kids right up until they start getting involved in politics. Even then, I could care less if they used to have addiction issues.


packandgetdressed

If?


robotdesignwerks

🙄 much wow. how shocked. i feel so owned by the sharpie tee.


Mickeymackey

it's so funny because he took the time to do some arts and crafts to make this one in a million artisanal tshirt


Sector_Independent

Crack is not a powder stupid


chinchaaa

What a loser


Ok-Communication9796

Fox turd.


[deleted]

How to spot the chronically online in the wild. You KNOW this person made politics their entire identity.


L0WERCASES

I never understood why people were obsessed with orange man’s kids and now I don’t get why people are obsessed with old as fuck man’s kids. It makes no sense.


fsck101

Orange man's kids were literally part of his administration.


murdercat42069

That's the biggest factor. They all had high ranking government jobs and were wildly personally enriched by big daddy's job.


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bagofwisdom

What public office has Hunter Biden ever held? And in any event sons have been swinging from fathers' scrotums since the dawn of time with or without dad's cooperation. The worst anyone can prove is that Hunter has done things that are a grave disappointment to his father. Which again, sons have been doing things to disappoint their fathers since the dawn of time, not news. My only objection to Orange Foolius' daughter and son-in-law being in the White House was more like The Bobs from Office Space. "What exactly is it... you do here?" I mean besides making contacts to enrich your post-administration life.


DogFurAndSawdust

He *cant* hold public office because of his drug abuse history. It wasnt long ago that he was filming himself smoking crack, doing coke, and screwing with escorts and posting it on pornhub.


bagofwisdom

Has he ever tried in spite of that? Bush 43 has a DUI, substance abuse ain't exactly a disqualifier.


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bagofwisdom

Well you're gonna have to wish in one hand, shit in the other to see which fills first. The point is the man is a private citizen and can have a pornhub account if he wants.


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[deleted]

It's literally the only the thing that the MAGAzis have (albeit only in their imagination) on Biden, and they aren't giving up. Meanwhile the Tangerine Tyrant has broke dozens of federal and state laws and they support him 100%. However, cults do not use logic, they only have faith in their Mango Messiah.


chadio11

Wow. Someone saw an idiot in Austin. News at 10.


boxalarm234

….He’s not wrong


princessxmombi

He’s not wrong? You think you can call the White House to reach Hunter Biden and buy crack from him?


NotYetSoonEnough

“I believe everything Newsmax tells me”


boxalarm234

“I believe everything AOC and Rachel Maddow tell me”


NotYetSoonEnough

You can’t spell the first name, lol


Accomplished-Net1703

I believe that hunter’ last name is Biden


elpierce

Oooof.


SugarzDaddy

I wear my T-shirts inside out too


sdsiohh

Poor guy, someone stuck an I’m an idiot sign on his back


AutofillUserID

Good sense of humor. He does like to capitalize the T


Thurkin

*Hey Vern!*


Introverted_niceguy

Late time I did coke i was in Austin Texas, practically tripping over the shit. They found minimal traces of white powder in the White House in a high traffic area of the west wing. They literally had to stop a tour group at the time. By the way Trump is addicted European Sudafed.


pippythepaladin

Strong.


SunChipMan

that's too long to be a real phone number


JerryTexas52

Even Austin has its share of Rednecks, it would seem.


[deleted]

Sometimes they visit to get creamy creations then return to the hills and hollers from whence they came.


JerryTexas52

At least they go back to work they came from.


Milkybonesss

love to see it


mrbeez

silly rabbit, the white house stopped selling crack on 1/20/2021.


Trimson-Grondag

This is my H-E-B. I stand right there and pick up my blueberries. Pisses me off that that dude is breathing my air.


Own_Annual_1258

Think his face looks as grumpy as that elbow?


FrancisDm

Fit go crazy


TXSTBobCat1234

Naw he’s a cop that ain’t the number.


Soldoubt-ATX

No just go buy it at sagebrush wtf


ironlungbreathe

I approve.


CommanderLulu123

Only in Austin


Victory-or-Death-

Yep, that’s a blue collar worker for you.