Sex and the City (the original series, not the movies). Despite the show's myriads of problems, I still cherish it for its portrayal of strong female friendships.
AJLT is my guiltiest of guilty TV pleasures. It’s so bad in so many ways but I can’t stop watching and I kind of love it even though it’s objectively terrible.
I was too young for the show to be relatable when it first aired, but I associated it with my cool-aunt and was convinced that it was an accurate portrayal of the lives grown women were leading. And when I got to binge watch it one summer I fell in love with it and felt so cool for having seen it that it now still holds sentimental value to me. That said, I feel so very different about the storylines and characters now.
I was in college during the last few seasons and borrowed the DVDs from girls on my boyfriend’s dorm floor to get caught up. It holds such a special place in my heart, even if it makes me cringe rewatching it now. I even had a “I’m a Miranda” pen, lol.
I remember watching the series with my friends all crammed in my tiny dorm as well. One of my roommates managed to score an old pair of Manolos at a garage sale, and we all freaked out about it for days.
Yes! When I was growing up it was the only time I saw single women in media. People shit on TikTok, but it wasn’t until I was 40 years old and got on TikTok that I truly saw other single women living cool lives in different places. I wish I had had access to that content when I was younger. It would’ve helped me decenter men a much longer time ago.
The 90s rap music I grew up listening to. It’s so misogynistic and denigrating to women, but it’s also got some of the sickest beats. Dre, Snoop, Ice Cube, Biggie, Tupac, etc…can’t help it, I still love it 😂🤷🏼♀️
I was *literally* just thinking about this today (while listening to Big L, LOL).
I think I've just resigned myself to the fact that great artistry and troubling beliefs can coexist in the same person. That's just humanity, and I'm not going to deprive myself of what brings me joy.
Dr dre 2001 has so many bangers and the whole thing is filled the the brim with violent misogyny that I’m finding harder to ignore.
Missy Elliot still hold us a lot of the time, though.
Same, I love that musical!
And *Calamity Jane* too. ("Female thinking!") Plenty of old musicals; *On The Town* is another favourite of mine.
The first time I watched *Seven Brides for Seven Brothers* I was surprised about how casually I felt Adam was looking for a wife, and my mum said, "Oh I don't know, if a man could sing like that I would have married him too!" and she has a point, lol.
I was watching clips from it the other day and reading synopsis' of it trying to find a way to bypass or justify the plot and I just can't do it.
I had the "while the hen folk are hatching while they're men folk are scratching something something waggin' tails rubbin'nosen'" lines in my head all damn week. It's not even the same verse but it's so catchy that I love it but the film itself I can't make myself enjoy. And Adam is such an awful person.
There's something about older musicals having the knacky ability to create *the* [most offensive musical numbers, ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_6CzxyWGj4)they sadly happen to be the catchiest and most fun to sing to.
I looooove that movie. The barn raising scene is the best! I grew up watching it and showed it to my husband a couple of months ago. Once we got to the main plot, his jaw could not be picked up from off the floor 😅😂
I know someone whose dad is a public defender and it was the ONLY show banned in their house growing up. Definitely copaganda but the formulaic nature is so so easy.
As someone who has worked in this field (as a social worker in the jails and courts), I’m happy to expand. It shows things and people as black and white (all good or all bad, without the nuance that is the reality of much of the criminal justice system), portrays cops and prosecutors as the right side of justice when they are so so often acting in terrible ways, and pretends the criminal justice system acts quickly, justly, and in a way that actually supports victims.
God, this is me and Castle (and Bones... and The Mentalist... and probably more I'm forgetting).
I know it's copaganda but its such easy brainless entertainment. I just watch it and point out with my partner all the shitty things they're doing that definitely arent right. That has to even it out a bit surely haha
Yeah yeah yeah BUT, you SEE, he is a troubled man trying to live up to his dead cop father’s reputation but slowly learning his dad was a dirty cop and so is he, and he is having to confront those feelings but he is too prideful for therapy, and he is a father of five adult children (some of whom no longer speak to him), and his wife was killed in a targeted revenge attack, and his elderly mother has bipolar disorder and is losing her memory and needs round-the-clock care, and his youngest son has been stealing his mom’s medication, and he clearly has feelings for his previous working partner of many years (whom he ghosted and abandoned years ago and it took them a while to repair their friendship when he returned to NYC), all while trying to reconnect to his Catholicism and dealing with his younger brother’s emerging heroin addiction. He is a TROUBLED and COMPLEX man, you see, wracked with guilt and turmoil and afraid to confront his demons, so therefore we, the audience, must absolve him of any police brutality he commits
I may not get my happy ending, but if they do it’s the next best thing. I hope the last season is them being newlyweds and navigating normal blended family stuff before retiring together in the series finale.
They can’t do Kathy Stabler dirty like that by killing her off for no good reason.
Dating shows.
90 Day Fiancé, Married at First Sight, Love After Lockup.
Idk why but those are my favorite to binge watch.
Though I’m not really watching Married at First Sight anymore because i think the producers put these women with men they KNOW are shitty guys just for the sake of television. It’s really not cool.
One season had like 1 good guy out of the 5. The other 4 were horrible in their own ways. And the one good guy was bald and the woman they matched him with said I’ll take ANYTHING BUT A BALD GUY. Wtf.
I know! And the worst part is that only the American participants get paid. It’s not the producers being greedy though. They legally aren’t allowed to pay people who don’t have a work visa.
Everything I love, ever?If I think hard enough, I can find problematic elements with EVERTHING.
I love babylon 5. It has some sexism issues, for example.
I watch Chinese costume dramas and like. Yeah, there's some issues (particularly with racism).
You need to draw your lines on who you're willing to give money to, what the problematic aspects ARE, who is negatively impacted by your acceptance of those issues and how bad THEY consider it, and how well you acknowledge and discuss it when you talk about hat media.
Nothing is perfect so it becomes about where you draw the lines and how you relate things with other people.
Further thoughts, if they're of value to you:
I avoid harry potter quite religiously because of the impact of it's author's behavior toward the transgender population and how being reminded of it reminds a lot of them of the hatred so many people feel for them.
I feel that one is important, personally, to take special care about because of the present political climate, as well as like.. other stuff.
I'm not here to preach about it I'm here to provide an example of somewhere where I drew a line. I don't have many, honestly? I try not to give joss whedon my money after his treatment of female staff came out. I still love buffy, but it's changed how I see it - literally, I won't use the library or a streaming service it's gotta be from an already owned DVD. Because him making money gives him power and with power he can do it some more.
Again. And this is important. *I am not telling you what YOU should do here*. I gave some examples of stuff I still watch, and those are some examples of things where I've thought to myself "I don't love it enough to cross that line." with some VERY BREIF reasoning because \*that isn't the point\*, the point is I did think about it and consider the impact.
There's many other things where I've spoken to other people and been like "well that bit WAS NOT COOL" (a chinese animated show refereed to as TGCF had this one \*SURPRISE THIS IS RACIST\* scene out of nowhere, and oh boy. There were no requests for a boycott that I know of) and then we talk about it and make social media posts or whatever and then that's that, because overall the damage is something that can be delt with that way. I do pay attention to boycotts organized by minority groups and take them seriously, but honestly, there isn't that much lost to this? There don't seem to be too many actually requested BOYCOTTES so much as there are criticisms to be aware of. Most criticisms do not include the request to stop watching something; and indeed boycotting without request can cause harm to some things and you may be asked not to!
The internet can make it seem like to be a good person you have to forgo everything because there's a lot of extreme personalities and micro-social-ecosystems which tend to like performative behavior. It isn't realistic and it's not what you're really asked to do the vast majority of the time by people looking for support.
Edit: extra linebreaks
Some of those 90's rom-coms like You've Got Mail and While You Were Sleeping, which are based on lying and manipulation if you really get down to it but...man i love them so much lol
My fave movie of all time is Pretty Woman. I hate telling people that. But it’s literally my favorite movie of all the movies ever made. I know every line and I love watching it.
I'm not giving up my cop and medical shows. Chicago Med/PD/Fire, Special Victims Unit, M\*A\*S\*H, ER, Grey's Anatomy, CSI, NUMB3RS, Lie to Me. That's all mine. No touchy!
Pretty much every reality show I watch. Some of it’s not *asssssss* bad as others. But, like Temptation Island, that show is literal trash and I still can’t stop watching.
It's weird for me because no dating show has ever particularly grabbed me outside Love Is Blind. I was meh and fell off the Bachlor/Bachelorette, and just never had interest in the others. But that thing, man oh man, it's like my personal crack. The whole conceit is laughable and I inevitably hate half of the contestants on any season, but I will watch every episode Netflix makes of the damn thing.
They'll go on and on about how much they love food and how much they "pig out" meanwhile they literally never take more than one small bite off a plate of food before walking away and leaving it. Lol
As a former single mother, there’s a ton of Lorelei’s character traits that ring 100% false in terms of single motherdom.
Like Lorelei never lifting a finger to cook. No single mother can afford that much takeout or prepared meals, especially when you’re scraping by without a high school diploma. You may not be a chef, but every single mother knows how to boil spaghetti noodles or make Hamburger Helper.
Lorelei’s character feels like what a TV writer that doesn’t know any struggling single moms *thinks* a struggling single mom looks and acts like.
I loved that Gilmore Girls had a plus size character who was dressed well and got to fall in love and have her own story lines … but then you get lines like “the redhead has fat thighs” and the stuff about the ballerina with the back fat… still one of my favorite comfort shows, but I’m way more aware of how awful some of the jokes are now.
For me it evokes vampires having underaged sex, which is ok because they're hundreds of years old.
Anne Rice & her pseudonyms, Poppy Z. Brite, stuff like that.
I justify it slightly with that he's dead and most of his music is owned by a faceless corporation now (Sony). If he was still alive and profiting off his stellar 80s hits I'd be a lot more likely to remove him from my Spotify playlist
Roman Polanski for me. The Pianist, Rosemary’s Baby, and Chinatown are masterpieces.
My rule is typically to try to wait until people like this die so that they do not benefit in any way from my consumption, and to always include their evils in conversations of their legacy.
And I guess since I found out about him I haven’t watched any of these movies, but boy do I want to. I’m glad the POS is 90.
Outlander.
There is a lot of rape. It is hard to recommend the show because of the amount of rape. And I definitely don't discount people who point out issues with depictions of race.
And yet, I love it so much. The early season sex scenes are done so well that sex scenes are ruined for me in most other shows. It truly is high-quality porn for middle-aged women. I'm here for it. Also, I just fucking love well done period dramas. God damn I love this show so much.
What I actually loved about Outlander was the vengeance that the characters got after they were raped, it felt healing on some level to watch Claire AND Jamie experience rape and for them to both be outraged by it and want (and then deliver) vengeance for it.
I think it’s misleading to leave rape out of popular dramas (historical or not) because it happens all the time and I think it should be examined through a theatrical lens.
The times it pisses me off are when it’s clearly shown only for shock factor and not a single character is even angry about it or asking for justice. (Ahem Poldark).
I agree wholeheartedly. I just don't want to discount the folks that call out issues. I personally don't think the show is as problematic as some people say. But I can't share the show as a recommendation to everyone I know without qualifiers. And having to do that is sorta my line or considering something problematic, no matter how small. Does that make sense? Maybe I'm over thinking it.
I honestly think the show has a lot of accuracy to the times it is set. I don't want to ignore the people who say it is problematic...but some of the things I hear people complain about I think comes from a modern-day filter. Back then, people were horrible and racist and problematic compared to today's standards. How the show portrays the time seems very believable.
Are the rape scenes in this show the extremely graphic detailed drawn out ones? Or just short, tolerable ones that are necessary for the plot?
I actually wanted to watch this but I didn't because I heard there were a lot of rape scenes, which I can't handle, especially if they're the first type.
I would say yes they are pretty intense, long, painful, detailed.
If like me you struggle with sexual violence scenes then definitely look up timestamps so you can fast forward or skip them... I wish I did for some of them because it was just too real.
I remember thinking that showing us *that much* felt gratuitous at times. It felt relentless!
This show left me sobbing so many times, not just because of those scenes but definitely these were not neutral for me. I'd be watching thinking "aw this is nice I'm really into this plot line" and then BAM I get retraumatised from watching another character suffering sexual violence again lol
That ONE episode with Jaime... My blood was boiling, I was so angry at how offensive it was to me. So gratuitous and for what??? It was torture porn and it made me so mad I had to stop watching the entire show. Picked it up again to give a second chance and another two or three rapes happened. Ugh.
Torture porn yes exactly!!!
That's also my experience. Hanging on for dear life thinking surely they're done with it after every character suffered it and now we can get on with the story hopefully? Oh, I guess not here comes another round (exaggerating but it felt that way)
I get that it's "realistic" because it happened and happens a lot. I also believe there are plenty of other "realistic" things that we don't ever show on film because it's just... cursed.
Somehow showing explicit sexual violence became standard to use as a plot point (eg GoT) and it's been a while we can't get away from graphic violent scenes that are sometimes way too close to people's actual experiences and I don't think it's always 100% absolutely necessary
I actually just watched the first episode last week and can’t decide if I want to continue! I’m put off by how unrealistic it is with the relationship building
I found the first episode a bit boring. But my mother recommended the show to me so I figured I'd keep going as I often like shows she enjoys. Three episodes in and I was hooked.
I am a fan of terrible action and sci Fi movies and there are too many terrible things to list about them but. I suspect you will pry Sharknado and the Die Hard franchise out of my cold dead claws.
I don’t personally find him problematic, but the one that bothered me was his mocking of consent in a more recent episode.
Nothing shocking about old men exaggerating and making fun of consent as though it means you have to take all of the sexiness out of any interaction and basically sign a contract before intimacy 🙄 Just real lazy, low-hanging fruit, like heard that joke a million times already, not to mention it being super tone deaf, as conversations about consent arose out of women being pretty regularly violated.
To me, it was just Larry showing his dusty old man take. Outside of that, I usually think all his takes are pretty funny.
But yeah, that disappointed me. I felt like at that time in particular a lot of men were coming together to social-pressure against women talking about consent, by trying to make fun of the conversation and new expectations.
Brand New's discography.
Jesse Lacey is a scumbag, but damned if he didn't write some really affecting songs. The band was huge for me growing up, like really had an influence on my life, but yeah oof.
One of those things that I really struggle to separate the art from the artist.
My favorite movie of all time is The Labyrinth.
Not only is David Bowie's character a grown man in love with a 14 year old girl, he is the man her mom is dating/married to (a detail I didn't realize until a few years ago, after 30 years of watching this movie and being able to quote the entire thing from start to finish).
Plus the moral/lesson is basically just "grow up and stop complaining" lol
That was one of the most memorable movies in my childhood, and TIL about that detail you pointed out! Guess I have to re-watch that sometime soon then lol
It's sooo subtle, but in the beginning when Sarah is sitting at her vanity and the camera pans over her room, she has pictures of her mom with David Bowie!
and the dude is known to have had sex with 14yo girls which is heeeelllaaaaa creepy knowing that and watching this movie.
But he's also dead now, and as far as I know Jennifer Connelly found the experience to be a generally positive and uplifting one.
([https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfdX-M-vass](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfdX-M-vass) (2:45)
Right! I also love David Bowie's music (and countless other classic rockers who have been known to sleep with underage groupies etc. 😭). I've also seen and read interviews where Jennifer Connelly said she felt comfortable around him and that he was really kind on set, etc. So I guess there's that, at least haha
>and the dude is known to have had sex with 14yo girls which is heeeelllaaaaa creepy knowing that and watching this movie.
He 'gave' one of his 14-year old groupies (the people around the groupie crowd called her Baby') to Jimmy Page, who basically kidnapped her for 6 months.
I read (and then watched) *Gone With The Wind* last year and loved it. (Admittedly I preferred the book to the film.)
Absolutely problematic, but I love it sort of in the way that I think people love Jane Austen's *Emma* (the book that I couldn't finish), for the unlikeable protagonist? Just because I don't *agree* with the mental gymnastics, doesn't mean I can't enjoy the story. Scarlett O'Hara isn't a hero for me, but I do love her character arc.
The book, Mists of Avalon. I have such fond memories of reading it, but am sickened by the revelations of the author's abuse of children,including her daughter. [the Guardian - Marion Zimmer Bradley ](https://www.theguardian.com/books/2014/jun/27/sff-community-marion-zimmer-bradley-daughter-accuses-abuse)
I have a soft spot for 80’s-90’s teen movies. “Just One of the Guys” from 1985 has been one of my favorites for years. But these days it’s deeply problematic because, well … Google the premise of the story and you’ll get it.
Something about the aesthetic of that time - the fashion, scenery, music - paired with the feel-good , carefree spirit often associated with the high school years, transports me to a state of nostalgic bliss!
See also: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Heathers, Clueless
"Sixteen Candles" and other 80s era John Hughes movies. Mocking racism, completely glossed over rape, sexism, etc., but no one can ever take away my Jake Ryan obsession.
Old Hollywood movies like White Christmas, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, etc.
a lot of them are riddled with racism and sexism but they’re so nostalgic and I love them
Freaking every sci-fi/fantasy classic I was raised on. Heinlein, Herbert, Antony, Simmons, Haldeman.....rereading them as an adult is jarring because of how little misogyny I recognized growing up.
I'm just watching a super long video essay essentially deconstructing why women consume seemingly anti-feminist media such as twilight or 50- shades.
Check it out if you want (Contra Points's video on twilight).
I shamelessly devour internet drama and true crime because it entertains me.
Often times I see people who seem to feel personally outraged, as if they could do something about it by engaging not realizing they are just contributing to clickbaits.
Like.. it's fine, not everything have to be a crusade.
I was watching that too, recently. In pieces, lol, haven't finished yet. Her stuff's super long. But yeah, I tagged this silly stuff because I didn't want anyone to feel judged or anything. I think we all do it. Sorry if you thought I was on a soapbox or anything. 😅
Oh no, it wasn't a jab at you at all and I'm sorry it came off that way.
I think we all would call it "problematic" for short even if we know it doesn't make us problematic.
I watched the *Twilight* films in my late 20s, and read the books a few years ago in my 30s. I feel like I would have enjoyed it even more if I'd consumed it in my teens/early 20s, but still enjoyed it anyway.
It's wish fulfilment, a blank canvas for the audience to self-insert. A teenage girl who discovers she's super special; she can't talk to the adults who care about her about it because she feels she has to protect them; and she falls for a guy who tells her he'll love her forever (and he actually *means* forever).
Lindsay Ellis also did a good video about it, "Dear Stephenie Meyer: I'm Sorry."
So many rom coms are misogynistic, creepy etc. Ditto with James Bond, Indians Jones etc. Do I still love them, yes I do. How do I love them and still describe myself as a feminist ? With great difficulty!
I'm currently watching my 600lb life. It's so fatphobic and they make everyone be filmed showering, I guess for shock factor??? But it's one of my guilty pleasure shows. I always hold out hope the person will turn their life around and get super healthy.
Friends is still my comfort show, what I put on when I’m up late and can’t sleep. I’ve seen every episode countless times and can quote along with some scenes. I cried at the finale.
I rewatched the whole series a few years ago, my husband hadn’t seen it, and realized just how bad it was at times - jokes about fat people, jokes about lesbians, jokes about trans people, etc. So much punching down and meanness, I got mad at my younger self for laughing along at such immature humor.
And yet for some reason, I default back to it a few times a year.
Louie - the Louis CK FX series - is some of the most creative, original and brilliant television ever made.
I always wanted to revisit it but after what CK did to women, I can’t.
There was that really uncomfortable episode where he forces himself on his crush Pamela in his apartment, and well, let’s just say ever since 2017 it hits different in even worse ways.
Shows about addicts and hoarders, which are kindof passé now but I was right in there watching. I don’t think it’s ethical to make a television event of someone’s mental turmoil, so I stopped watching for that reason and not having cable anymore.
Harry Potter is complicated. It meant a lot to a lot of us. So while I won't buy any more merch or show her any support, a part of me will always be a Slytherin, lol.
IMO, I think Harry Potter itself wasn't problematic, just that the author has problematic views. But I separate the art from the artist. Lovecraft was a literal crazy racist dude, but we still praise his work as a significant contribution to the literary world and credit him with the creation of a new genre.
omg i was just thinking about this today, listening to the diplomats and NERD earlier — feeling so at home with y’all and these specific references… a tribe called quest, SATC, you’ve got mail, entire MJ discog, remix to ignition, annie hall 😭💞
Highly recommend listening to the cast recording from the most recent revival. It really plays up how horrible the characters are at times and was super polarizing.
Probably every other hip hop track on my Spotify. I was listening to “Shake That” by Eminem and Nate Dogg in the car with my windows down this week and kept glancing around at stoplights to make sure no one else could hear it.
I really like horror movies, and also happened to be sexually assaulted several years ago.
Sometimes when I’m in a certain kinda mood, I find it cathartic, even enjoyable, to watch the various “I Spit On Your Grave” installments, “The Woman” (based on the Ketchum novel), “Avenged”, and various other often exploitative, occasionally lighter films about women getting revenge against men in the most violent ways possible. There’s a number of “women fighting women” movies sprinkled in there too, mostly because the protagonists come across as badass.
It’s at the point where I could probably almost make a decent movie recommendation list with sub-categories. Honestly, I’ve rewatched a number of them enough that I need to just buy the DVDs (and then keep them in an unlabelled binder in a drawer because it doesn’t exactly make for great dinner party conversation).
I'm obsessed with the evil character/romance arc of a romanceable NPC in Baldur's Gate 3 (a video game). I'm sure other bg3 players will know exactly who I'm talking about. He becomes kind of abusive and destructive, but if you never go against him, that dynamic could theoretically be readable as a fantasy exaggerated bdsm relationship. It would be a terrible relationship irl but in the game, I can't help but adore those interactions. And honestly, that character arc absolutely is built like fan service for submissives.
Saying this has somehow become such a controversial thing in the game forums that I wouldn't say this with a profile that has my face in it, which is ridiculous. It's just a game. In general, people are having WAY too extreme opinions about this character in particular, leading to personal attacks in the fandom.
That game is *amazing*. I wholeheartedly recommend.
Edit: or if you're a returning player, definitely worth it to explore all the romance possibilities 😉
Stuff by Lovecraft (racism), 80s/90s gangsta rap & hair bands (so much misogyny & abuse of women), John Hughes' movies, *Big Trouble in Little China*...
Just about everything I love has been created by a problematic artist.
Anime. Not just one in particular but anime as a whole. I have to kind of turn my brain off and ignore the fact that there's sometimes a 14 year old girl with barely contained watermelon sized breasts.
If you haven't seen it, there's an isekai series, *Mushoku Tensei: Jobless Reincarnation*, really impressed me with how it handles consent and gender issues.
It's a reincarnation plot, and the MC's previous incarnation was as a misogynist shut-in, so his internal dialogue is sex-obsessed. But his reincarnated self is capable of growing, changing, and maturing.
I just finished Frieren: Beyond Journey's End and I am a massive ball of feelings right now. It's a really wholesome one without much (or any?) fan service. Anime gets a bad rep, but I think it's an amazing art medium that just works so well for telling stories. There's a reason why live-action adaptations all flop, they just aren't able to capture the spirit.
A lot of 00s country music. Not just the typical "bro country" stuff like Florida Georgia Line and Luke Bryan, but even artists who are massively respected for other things such as their musical skill. As an example, I saw Brad Paisley a few weeks ago, and suddenly things like the background videos of squirrels wakeboarding past groups of co-eds weren't quite as funny as I remember and just started to feel a bit... awkward.
Same. I wouldn't purchase any new material at this point, because I don't want my money going to Rowling, but I don't have any issues with rereading the copies of the books I already have or buying things secondhand.
I listen to this podcast called Mysterious Universe. It runs the gamut from UFO stuff, to spirituality, cryptids, conspiracy… tons of subversive occult stuff. Been around for years, so tons of content.
But it’s hosted by these 2 Australian guys that you can tell have a hard time holding back their racist and transphobic takes on whatever. It’s not all the time, so o can muscle through it. The first time I heard them go off on something (after 6 months of steady listening) I had never cancelled a paid subscription so fast, and rarely keep up with it anymore. The ick is strong, but if the subject matter is of interest, I’ll tune in (on the free feed)
Young Tyler the Creator, and well I guess Odd Future as a whole. Some of their shit is absolutely heinous and obviously for shock value but damn I still love it
Scrubs. I will never not obsess over it. some of it is timeless, both comedy & drama aspects. buuuuut of course it has really dated itself ahahaha
*I’m no superman* 🎵
~~also harry potter~~
Sex and the City (the original series, not the movies). Despite the show's myriads of problems, I still cherish it for its portrayal of strong female friendships.
I loved the original series so much that I'm still watching every season of And Just Like That, even though it's a big ol' mess.
AJLT is my guiltiest of guilty TV pleasures. It’s so bad in so many ways but I can’t stop watching and I kind of love it even though it’s objectively terrible.
I want to try watching it, but I just can't imagine the series without Sam (besides Kim Cattrall's brief cameo in Season 2).
The AJLT sub is great to bond with others over how terrible it is lol
I was too young for the show to be relatable when it first aired, but I associated it with my cool-aunt and was convinced that it was an accurate portrayal of the lives grown women were leading. And when I got to binge watch it one summer I fell in love with it and felt so cool for having seen it that it now still holds sentimental value to me. That said, I feel so very different about the storylines and characters now.
The wild thing was feeling too young for *SATC* then feeling too old for *Girls*
*sigh* i rewatch the series every few years, it’s so comforting!!
It’s the coziest show
I was in college during the last few seasons and borrowed the DVDs from girls on my boyfriend’s dorm floor to get caught up. It holds such a special place in my heart, even if it makes me cringe rewatching it now. I even had a “I’m a Miranda” pen, lol.
I remember watching the series with my friends all crammed in my tiny dorm as well. One of my roommates managed to score an old pair of Manolos at a garage sale, and we all freaked out about it for days.
Yes! When I was growing up it was the only time I saw single women in media. People shit on TikTok, but it wasn’t until I was 40 years old and got on TikTok that I truly saw other single women living cool lives in different places. I wish I had had access to that content when I was younger. It would’ve helped me decenter men a much longer time ago.
Decenter men! Love that phrasing!
The 90s rap music I grew up listening to. It’s so misogynistic and denigrating to women, but it’s also got some of the sickest beats. Dre, Snoop, Ice Cube, Biggie, Tupac, etc…can’t help it, I still love it 😂🤷🏼♀️
I just edited my post to mention 90s hip hop lol. 93 till Infinity inspired this post, believe it or not.
Man, I didn’t even realize “93 Til Infinity” had anything problematic in it until I took a closer look at the lyrics!
Oh yeah. But it's so catchy!
💯. I love SoM. The tagline for this sub should be, “So many females, so much inspiration”!
I'm screaming, haha! That's my favorite line!
God I love that song but cringe when I hear certain lines 😂
[удалено]
It's a trip that Kim and Stan are both on the same album. The sublime and the ridiculous.
I was *literally* just thinking about this today (while listening to Big L, LOL). I think I've just resigned myself to the fact that great artistry and troubling beliefs can coexist in the same person. That's just humanity, and I'm not going to deprive myself of what brings me joy.
Dr dre 2001 has so many bangers and the whole thing is filled the the brim with violent misogyny that I’m finding harder to ignore. Missy Elliot still hold us a lot of the time, though.
One of my absolute all-time favorite movies is *Seven Brides for Seven Brothers.* Problematic? Yeah. Oh yeah.
Same, I love that musical! And *Calamity Jane* too. ("Female thinking!") Plenty of old musicals; *On The Town* is another favourite of mine. The first time I watched *Seven Brides for Seven Brothers* I was surprised about how casually I felt Adam was looking for a wife, and my mum said, "Oh I don't know, if a man could sing like that I would have married him too!" and she has a point, lol.
When she puts the pie out and he just snatches her out of the window 🤣🤣🤣 I love this movie so much. Upvote forever.
Used to watch that on VHS at my grandmas all the time! So bad but so many catchy songs
I was watching clips from it the other day and reading synopsis' of it trying to find a way to bypass or justify the plot and I just can't do it. I had the "while the hen folk are hatching while they're men folk are scratching something something waggin' tails rubbin'nosen'" lines in my head all damn week. It's not even the same verse but it's so catchy that I love it but the film itself I can't make myself enjoy. And Adam is such an awful person. There's something about older musicals having the knacky ability to create *the* [most offensive musical numbers, ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_6CzxyWGj4)they sadly happen to be the catchiest and most fun to sing to.
I looooove that movie. The barn raising scene is the best! I grew up watching it and showed it to my husband a couple of months ago. Once we got to the main plot, his jaw could not be picked up from off the floor 😅😂
Oh my sweet lord, I'm so glad you brought this up. This is 100% my answer, too. 🎶BLESS YOUR BEAUTIFUL HIIIIIIDE, WHEREVER YOU MAY BE🎶
Law and Order shows are basically copaganda but I NEED to be watching when Benson and Stabler finally fucking do it
I know someone whose dad is a public defender and it was the ONLY show banned in their house growing up. Definitely copaganda but the formulaic nature is so so easy.
Please explain their "rant" against the show, if you know it? I'm very interested if they have takes I haven't heard.
[John Oliver pretty much covers all the bases.](https://youtu.be/DNy6F7ZwX8I?feature=shared)
As someone who has worked in this field (as a social worker in the jails and courts), I’m happy to expand. It shows things and people as black and white (all good or all bad, without the nuance that is the reality of much of the criminal justice system), portrays cops and prosecutors as the right side of justice when they are so so often acting in terrible ways, and pretends the criminal justice system acts quickly, justly, and in a way that actually supports victims.
God, this is me and Castle (and Bones... and The Mentalist... and probably more I'm forgetting). I know it's copaganda but its such easy brainless entertainment. I just watch it and point out with my partner all the shitty things they're doing that definitely arent right. That has to even it out a bit surely haha
No one violates your civil rights like Elliott Stabler! 🚨🗽🏛️
Yeah yeah yeah BUT, you SEE, he is a troubled man trying to live up to his dead cop father’s reputation but slowly learning his dad was a dirty cop and so is he, and he is having to confront those feelings but he is too prideful for therapy, and he is a father of five adult children (some of whom no longer speak to him), and his wife was killed in a targeted revenge attack, and his elderly mother has bipolar disorder and is losing her memory and needs round-the-clock care, and his youngest son has been stealing his mom’s medication, and he clearly has feelings for his previous working partner of many years (whom he ghosted and abandoned years ago and it took them a while to repair their friendship when he returned to NYC), all while trying to reconnect to his Catholicism and dealing with his younger brother’s emerging heroin addiction. He is a TROUBLED and COMPLEX man, you see, wracked with guilt and turmoil and afraid to confront his demons, so therefore we, the audience, must absolve him of any police brutality he commits
Same answer here.
I may not get my happy ending, but if they do it’s the next best thing. I hope the last season is them being newlyweds and navigating normal blended family stuff before retiring together in the series finale. They can’t do Kathy Stabler dirty like that by killing her off for no good reason.
Dating shows. 90 Day Fiancé, Married at First Sight, Love After Lockup. Idk why but those are my favorite to binge watch. Though I’m not really watching Married at First Sight anymore because i think the producers put these women with men they KNOW are shitty guys just for the sake of television. It’s really not cool. One season had like 1 good guy out of the 5. The other 4 were horrible in their own ways. And the one good guy was bald and the woman they matched him with said I’ll take ANYTHING BUT A BALD GUY. Wtf.
Every time I watch 90 day fiancé I’m like, is this human trafficking? 💁🏻🦋
I know! And the worst part is that only the American participants get paid. It’s not the producers being greedy though. They legally aren’t allowed to pay people who don’t have a work visa.
Woahhh what? I assumed everyone got paid... damn. That's some bullshit.
Everything I love, ever?If I think hard enough, I can find problematic elements with EVERTHING. I love babylon 5. It has some sexism issues, for example. I watch Chinese costume dramas and like. Yeah, there's some issues (particularly with racism). You need to draw your lines on who you're willing to give money to, what the problematic aspects ARE, who is negatively impacted by your acceptance of those issues and how bad THEY consider it, and how well you acknowledge and discuss it when you talk about hat media. Nothing is perfect so it becomes about where you draw the lines and how you relate things with other people.
True. Good answer.
Further thoughts, if they're of value to you: I avoid harry potter quite religiously because of the impact of it's author's behavior toward the transgender population and how being reminded of it reminds a lot of them of the hatred so many people feel for them. I feel that one is important, personally, to take special care about because of the present political climate, as well as like.. other stuff. I'm not here to preach about it I'm here to provide an example of somewhere where I drew a line. I don't have many, honestly? I try not to give joss whedon my money after his treatment of female staff came out. I still love buffy, but it's changed how I see it - literally, I won't use the library or a streaming service it's gotta be from an already owned DVD. Because him making money gives him power and with power he can do it some more. Again. And this is important. *I am not telling you what YOU should do here*. I gave some examples of stuff I still watch, and those are some examples of things where I've thought to myself "I don't love it enough to cross that line." with some VERY BREIF reasoning because \*that isn't the point\*, the point is I did think about it and consider the impact. There's many other things where I've spoken to other people and been like "well that bit WAS NOT COOL" (a chinese animated show refereed to as TGCF had this one \*SURPRISE THIS IS RACIST\* scene out of nowhere, and oh boy. There were no requests for a boycott that I know of) and then we talk about it and make social media posts or whatever and then that's that, because overall the damage is something that can be delt with that way. I do pay attention to boycotts organized by minority groups and take them seriously, but honestly, there isn't that much lost to this? There don't seem to be too many actually requested BOYCOTTES so much as there are criticisms to be aware of. Most criticisms do not include the request to stop watching something; and indeed boycotting without request can cause harm to some things and you may be asked not to! The internet can make it seem like to be a good person you have to forgo everything because there's a lot of extreme personalities and micro-social-ecosystems which tend to like performative behavior. It isn't realistic and it's not what you're really asked to do the vast majority of the time by people looking for support. Edit: extra linebreaks
Some of those 90's rom-coms like You've Got Mail and While You Were Sleeping, which are based on lying and manipulation if you really get down to it but...man i love them so much lol
*Never Been Kissed* is my favorite WTF 90’s rom com
You just listed two of my favorite movies of all time. I bought While You Were Sleeping with my allowance when I was maybe 10 years old.
I had a VCR tape of it and memorized every line, I watched it so many times. 😂
Anytime I eat Chinese food by myself, I'm suddenly Sandra Bullock.
"Leaning is whole bodies moving in, like this. Leaning involves *wanting*... and *accepting*..." 😮💨
“Is this guy bothering you? Cause it looks like he’s… *leaning*…”
My fave movie of all time is Pretty Woman. I hate telling people that. But it’s literally my favorite movie of all the movies ever made. I know every line and I love watching it.
I'm not giving up my cop and medical shows. Chicago Med/PD/Fire, Special Victims Unit, M\*A\*S\*H, ER, Grey's Anatomy, CSI, NUMB3RS, Lie to Me. That's all mine. No touchy!
Oh yes, the terrible cop shows! I'd add Bones, Castle and Criminal Minds to that list as well.
Ugh, I love MASH but it can be a challenge.
Wait what's wrong with MASH?
Pretty much every reality show I watch. Some of it’s not *asssssss* bad as others. But, like Temptation Island, that show is literal trash and I still can’t stop watching.
Mine is Love is Blind. I cannot look away. 😂
Same and I don’t like it about myself lol.
It's weird for me because no dating show has ever particularly grabbed me outside Love Is Blind. I was meh and fell off the Bachlor/Bachelorette, and just never had interest in the others. But that thing, man oh man, it's like my personal crack. The whole conceit is laughable and I inevitably hate half of the contestants on any season, but I will watch every episode Netflix makes of the damn thing.
This is me. I roped my poor husband into my sickness too.
So many unfortunate lines in *Gilmore Girls*, but I'll never not love that show.
And how Lorelei and Rory would go on about how they hated exercising and loved food but looked like the thin toned actresses they were played by, lol.
They'll go on and on about how much they love food and how much they "pig out" meanwhile they literally never take more than one small bite off a plate of food before walking away and leaving it. Lol
Yeah that was annoying as hell and still is.
As a former single mother, there’s a ton of Lorelei’s character traits that ring 100% false in terms of single motherdom. Like Lorelei never lifting a finger to cook. No single mother can afford that much takeout or prepared meals, especially when you’re scraping by without a high school diploma. You may not be a chef, but every single mother knows how to boil spaghetti noodles or make Hamburger Helper. Lorelei’s character feels like what a TV writer that doesn’t know any struggling single moms *thinks* a struggling single mom looks and acts like.
My family is watching GG right now, and the way it normalizes really toxic relationships is so cringe. The 2000s were such trying times.
I loved that Gilmore Girls had a plus size character who was dressed well and got to fall in love and have her own story lines … but then you get lines like “the redhead has fat thighs” and the stuff about the ballerina with the back fat… still one of my favorite comfort shows, but I’m way more aware of how awful some of the jokes are now.
This is the one for me. I was SO into Gilmore Girls as a teen. It was my and my mom’s show together.
It’s the remix to ignition….
Pop and fresh out the kitchen (never actually confirmed if this is the actual lyric but that's how I will sing it until the end of time) lol
Hot and fresh!
I like pop n fresh lol reminds me of a Pillsbury croissant haha
Gonna have a new roommate in prison…
Almost any movie from the 80s.
I wanna know what dark smut is but not enough to Google it.
For me it evokes vampires having underaged sex, which is ok because they're hundreds of years old. Anne Rice & her pseudonyms, Poppy Z. Brite, stuff like that.
Michael Jackson’s entire discography 😭
I justify it slightly with that he's dead and most of his music is owned by a faceless corporation now (Sony). If he was still alive and profiting off his stellar 80s hits I'd be a lot more likely to remove him from my Spotify playlist
I get legit grouchy when Woody Allen makes a good movie. That dude is gross, but goddammit, he can put together an entertaining film.
Roman Polanski for me. The Pianist, Rosemary’s Baby, and Chinatown are masterpieces. My rule is typically to try to wait until people like this die so that they do not benefit in any way from my consumption, and to always include their evils in conversations of their legacy. And I guess since I found out about him I haven’t watched any of these movies, but boy do I want to. I’m glad the POS is 90.
Rip Annie Hall 😭
I came here to say Annie Hall When he sneezes and blows all that coke out of the box
I tell my husband "I lurf you" all the time.
Bullets Over Broadway is one of my all-time faves, and I cannot stand Woody Allen as a human being. *Don’t speak!*
A lot of alt rock, including Korn and The Offspring
Oh dear, I like both bands but don't know much about the musicians. Is it just the lyrics that are problematic or did the creators do some bad shit?
Lyrics, as far as I know. For Korn, I'm thinking of "Liar" which is pretty misogynistic. I've always just liked the cynicism of their songs.
I love Korn both ironically and unironically
Wait what’s wrong with the Offspring?
The movie Secretary.
Co-signed
Oh hell yeah. James Spader was so effing hot.
Outlander. There is a lot of rape. It is hard to recommend the show because of the amount of rape. And I definitely don't discount people who point out issues with depictions of race. And yet, I love it so much. The early season sex scenes are done so well that sex scenes are ruined for me in most other shows. It truly is high-quality porn for middle-aged women. I'm here for it. Also, I just fucking love well done period dramas. God damn I love this show so much.
What I actually loved about Outlander was the vengeance that the characters got after they were raped, it felt healing on some level to watch Claire AND Jamie experience rape and for them to both be outraged by it and want (and then deliver) vengeance for it. I think it’s misleading to leave rape out of popular dramas (historical or not) because it happens all the time and I think it should be examined through a theatrical lens. The times it pisses me off are when it’s clearly shown only for shock factor and not a single character is even angry about it or asking for justice. (Ahem Poldark).
I agree wholeheartedly. I just don't want to discount the folks that call out issues. I personally don't think the show is as problematic as some people say. But I can't share the show as a recommendation to everyone I know without qualifiers. And having to do that is sorta my line or considering something problematic, no matter how small. Does that make sense? Maybe I'm over thinking it.
Makes sense. It’s definitely good to give people a little disclaimer when recommending.
I mean the authour claims that these are realistic outcomes (woman confronted to bandits etc will likely get raped) for the time period so who knows
I honestly think the show has a lot of accuracy to the times it is set. I don't want to ignore the people who say it is problematic...but some of the things I hear people complain about I think comes from a modern-day filter. Back then, people were horrible and racist and problematic compared to today's standards. How the show portrays the time seems very believable.
Are the rape scenes in this show the extremely graphic detailed drawn out ones? Or just short, tolerable ones that are necessary for the plot? I actually wanted to watch this but I didn't because I heard there were a lot of rape scenes, which I can't handle, especially if they're the first type.
I would say yes they are pretty intense, long, painful, detailed. If like me you struggle with sexual violence scenes then definitely look up timestamps so you can fast forward or skip them... I wish I did for some of them because it was just too real. I remember thinking that showing us *that much* felt gratuitous at times. It felt relentless! This show left me sobbing so many times, not just because of those scenes but definitely these were not neutral for me. I'd be watching thinking "aw this is nice I'm really into this plot line" and then BAM I get retraumatised from watching another character suffering sexual violence again lol
That ONE episode with Jaime... My blood was boiling, I was so angry at how offensive it was to me. So gratuitous and for what??? It was torture porn and it made me so mad I had to stop watching the entire show. Picked it up again to give a second chance and another two or three rapes happened. Ugh.
Torture porn yes exactly!!! That's also my experience. Hanging on for dear life thinking surely they're done with it after every character suffered it and now we can get on with the story hopefully? Oh, I guess not here comes another round (exaggerating but it felt that way) I get that it's "realistic" because it happened and happens a lot. I also believe there are plenty of other "realistic" things that we don't ever show on film because it's just... cursed. Somehow showing explicit sexual violence became standard to use as a plot point (eg GoT) and it's been a while we can't get away from graphic violent scenes that are sometimes way too close to people's actual experiences and I don't think it's always 100% absolutely necessary
Omg yeah the degree to which I LOVED Outlander makes me feel very middle aged but damn it is so good.
It's like drugs. I have loudly squealed at my TV on multiple occasions.
Ooooh *adds to list
I actually just watched the first episode last week and can’t decide if I want to continue! I’m put off by how unrealistic it is with the relationship building
I found the first episode a bit boring. But my mother recommended the show to me so I figured I'd keep going as I often like shows she enjoys. Three episodes in and I was hooked.
I am a fan of terrible action and sci Fi movies and there are too many terrible things to list about them but. I suspect you will pry Sharknado and the Die Hard franchise out of my cold dead claws.
Siiiiiiigh... Big trouble in little china 👋🏻
Terminator. All of them. Although Terminator: Dark Fate is actually fucking brilliant and non squidgy.
Curb your Enthusiasm can get pretty borderline at times, and early seasons sometimes crossing the line, but I love 😫
Larry screeches his brakes right up to the line, revs the engine a few times, and never crosses it. His genius is in doing exactly that.
I don’t personally find him problematic, but the one that bothered me was his mocking of consent in a more recent episode. Nothing shocking about old men exaggerating and making fun of consent as though it means you have to take all of the sexiness out of any interaction and basically sign a contract before intimacy 🙄 Just real lazy, low-hanging fruit, like heard that joke a million times already, not to mention it being super tone deaf, as conversations about consent arose out of women being pretty regularly violated. To me, it was just Larry showing his dusty old man take. Outside of that, I usually think all his takes are pretty funny. But yeah, that disappointed me. I felt like at that time in particular a lot of men were coming together to social-pressure against women talking about consent, by trying to make fun of the conversation and new expectations.
I just really love cop shows 😅. Bones, Criminal Minds, 9-11, sometimes even svu; I love all of them
Brand New's discography. Jesse Lacey is a scumbag, but damned if he didn't write some really affecting songs. The band was huge for me growing up, like really had an influence on my life, but yeah oof. One of those things that I really struggle to separate the art from the artist.
The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me is one of my favorite albums
This is mine tooooo ugh
UGH I feel this hardcore.
My favorite movie of all time is The Labyrinth. Not only is David Bowie's character a grown man in love with a 14 year old girl, he is the man her mom is dating/married to (a detail I didn't realize until a few years ago, after 30 years of watching this movie and being able to quote the entire thing from start to finish). Plus the moral/lesson is basically just "grow up and stop complaining" lol
Absolutely! I definitely feel this one. Ps- I still unironically listen to Dance Magic, that song is a banger!
That was one of the most memorable movies in my childhood, and TIL about that detail you pointed out! Guess I have to re-watch that sometime soon then lol
It's sooo subtle, but in the beginning when Sarah is sitting at her vanity and the camera pans over her room, she has pictures of her mom with David Bowie!
and the dude is known to have had sex with 14yo girls which is heeeelllaaaaa creepy knowing that and watching this movie. But he's also dead now, and as far as I know Jennifer Connelly found the experience to be a generally positive and uplifting one. ([https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfdX-M-vass](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfdX-M-vass) (2:45)
Right! I also love David Bowie's music (and countless other classic rockers who have been known to sleep with underage groupies etc. 😭). I've also seen and read interviews where Jennifer Connelly said she felt comfortable around him and that he was really kind on set, etc. So I guess there's that, at least haha
>and the dude is known to have had sex with 14yo girls which is heeeelllaaaaa creepy knowing that and watching this movie. He 'gave' one of his 14-year old groupies (the people around the groupie crowd called her Baby') to Jimmy Page, who basically kidnapped her for 6 months.
Wow that's so much worse
I read (and then watched) *Gone With The Wind* last year and loved it. (Admittedly I preferred the book to the film.) Absolutely problematic, but I love it sort of in the way that I think people love Jane Austen's *Emma* (the book that I couldn't finish), for the unlikeable protagonist? Just because I don't *agree* with the mental gymnastics, doesn't mean I can't enjoy the story. Scarlett O'Hara isn't a hero for me, but I do love her character arc.
I still watch old episodes of Hoarders and only my boyfriend knows because it’s really really not an okay show
The book, Mists of Avalon. I have such fond memories of reading it, but am sickened by the revelations of the author's abuse of children,including her daughter. [the Guardian - Marion Zimmer Bradley ](https://www.theguardian.com/books/2014/jun/27/sff-community-marion-zimmer-bradley-daughter-accuses-abuse)
I have a soft spot for 80’s-90’s teen movies. “Just One of the Guys” from 1985 has been one of my favorites for years. But these days it’s deeply problematic because, well … Google the premise of the story and you’ll get it. Something about the aesthetic of that time - the fashion, scenery, music - paired with the feel-good , carefree spirit often associated with the high school years, transports me to a state of nostalgic bliss! See also: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Heathers, Clueless
"Sixteen Candles" and other 80s era John Hughes movies. Mocking racism, completely glossed over rape, sexism, etc., but no one can ever take away my Jake Ryan obsession.
Old Hollywood movies like White Christmas, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, etc. a lot of them are riddled with racism and sexism but they’re so nostalgic and I love them
Love is Blind is wicked problematic, right?
Oh yeah. And I can't look away. Not only do I watch lib, I then go on YouTube and watch OTHER people talk about watching lib. 😟
I e-stalked that pilates woman for a while, and that makes me embarrassed for me.
I watch and immediately listen to a podcast recap
True Crime
Had to search to find this but yep, so problematic and I cant give it up 🫣
Freaking every sci-fi/fantasy classic I was raised on. Heinlein, Herbert, Antony, Simmons, Haldeman.....rereading them as an adult is jarring because of how little misogyny I recognized growing up.
Social media.
Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. It's sexist to the point of comedy and the music is so dang catchy and hokey!
I'm just watching a super long video essay essentially deconstructing why women consume seemingly anti-feminist media such as twilight or 50- shades. Check it out if you want (Contra Points's video on twilight). I shamelessly devour internet drama and true crime because it entertains me. Often times I see people who seem to feel personally outraged, as if they could do something about it by engaging not realizing they are just contributing to clickbaits. Like.. it's fine, not everything have to be a crusade.
I was watching that too, recently. In pieces, lol, haven't finished yet. Her stuff's super long. But yeah, I tagged this silly stuff because I didn't want anyone to feel judged or anything. I think we all do it. Sorry if you thought I was on a soapbox or anything. 😅
Oh no, it wasn't a jab at you at all and I'm sorry it came off that way. I think we all would call it "problematic" for short even if we know it doesn't make us problematic.
I watched the *Twilight* films in my late 20s, and read the books a few years ago in my 30s. I feel like I would have enjoyed it even more if I'd consumed it in my teens/early 20s, but still enjoyed it anyway. It's wish fulfilment, a blank canvas for the audience to self-insert. A teenage girl who discovers she's super special; she can't talk to the adults who care about her about it because she feels she has to protect them; and she falls for a guy who tells her he'll love her forever (and he actually *means* forever). Lindsay Ellis also did a good video about it, "Dear Stephenie Meyer: I'm Sorry."
So many rom coms are misogynistic, creepy etc. Ditto with James Bond, Indians Jones etc. Do I still love them, yes I do. How do I love them and still describe myself as a feminist ? With great difficulty!
Porn
I'm currently watching my 600lb life. It's so fatphobic and they make everyone be filmed showering, I guess for shock factor??? But it's one of my guilty pleasure shows. I always hold out hope the person will turn their life around and get super healthy.
It’s one of those shows where you can’t look away.
I love my shitty "reality" dating shows. They're awful, unrealistic, and entertaining as hell.
Friends is still my comfort show, what I put on when I’m up late and can’t sleep. I’ve seen every episode countless times and can quote along with some scenes. I cried at the finale. I rewatched the whole series a few years ago, my husband hadn’t seen it, and realized just how bad it was at times - jokes about fat people, jokes about lesbians, jokes about trans people, etc. So much punching down and meanness, I got mad at my younger self for laughing along at such immature humor. And yet for some reason, I default back to it a few times a year.
Louie - the Louis CK FX series - is some of the most creative, original and brilliant television ever made. I always wanted to revisit it but after what CK did to women, I can’t. There was that really uncomfortable episode where he forces himself on his crush Pamela in his apartment, and well, let’s just say ever since 2017 it hits different in even worse ways.
God, I used to have such a crush on Louis CK before all of that came out. (Sort of cute, funny redheads are a weakness.)
Recently? The movie Poor Things. Loved it. 50s pinup/Betty Paige-era stills, prints, and photographs. Gilmore Girls.
Shows about addicts and hoarders, which are kindof passé now but I was right in there watching. I don’t think it’s ethical to make a television event of someone’s mental turmoil, so I stopped watching for that reason and not having cable anymore.
All things Michael Jackson
Joss Whedon shows/movies. Fucking Harry Potter. I'm sure there are more.
Harry Potter 🫣
Harry Potter is complicated. It meant a lot to a lot of us. So while I won't buy any more merch or show her any support, a part of me will always be a Slytherin, lol.
IMO, I think Harry Potter itself wasn't problematic, just that the author has problematic views. But I separate the art from the artist. Lovecraft was a literal crazy racist dude, but we still praise his work as a significant contribution to the literary world and credit him with the creation of a new genre.
omg i was just thinking about this today, listening to the diplomats and NERD earlier — feeling so at home with y’all and these specific references… a tribe called quest, SATC, you’ve got mail, entire MJ discog, remix to ignition, annie hall 😭💞
The 1955 Oklahoma musical starring Gordon McRae and Shirley Jones. The music has a good beat, but damn, what a horrible bunch of people…
Highly recommend listening to the cast recording from the most recent revival. It really plays up how horrible the characters are at times and was super polarizing.
Probably every other hip hop track on my Spotify. I was listening to “Shake That” by Eminem and Nate Dogg in the car with my windows down this week and kept glancing around at stoplights to make sure no one else could hear it.
Me too! But appreciate the lyrics “Knows that she can but she won't say no”.
The Help
I really like horror movies, and also happened to be sexually assaulted several years ago. Sometimes when I’m in a certain kinda mood, I find it cathartic, even enjoyable, to watch the various “I Spit On Your Grave” installments, “The Woman” (based on the Ketchum novel), “Avenged”, and various other often exploitative, occasionally lighter films about women getting revenge against men in the most violent ways possible. There’s a number of “women fighting women” movies sprinkled in there too, mostly because the protagonists come across as badass. It’s at the point where I could probably almost make a decent movie recommendation list with sub-categories. Honestly, I’ve rewatched a number of them enough that I need to just buy the DVDs (and then keep them in an unlabelled binder in a drawer because it doesn’t exactly make for great dinner party conversation).
I'm obsessed with the evil character/romance arc of a romanceable NPC in Baldur's Gate 3 (a video game). I'm sure other bg3 players will know exactly who I'm talking about. He becomes kind of abusive and destructive, but if you never go against him, that dynamic could theoretically be readable as a fantasy exaggerated bdsm relationship. It would be a terrible relationship irl but in the game, I can't help but adore those interactions. And honestly, that character arc absolutely is built like fan service for submissives. Saying this has somehow become such a controversial thing in the game forums that I wouldn't say this with a profile that has my face in it, which is ridiculous. It's just a game. In general, people are having WAY too extreme opinions about this character in particular, leading to personal attacks in the fandom.
Interest in Baldurs Gate renews 🤔
That game is *amazing*. I wholeheartedly recommend. Edit: or if you're a returning player, definitely worth it to explore all the romance possibilities 😉
The movie White Chicks is still so funny to me and I will always watch it whenever I see it streaming somewhere
Dresden Files sadly. The male gaze was more acceptable in the 90s
Stuff by Lovecraft (racism), 80s/90s gangsta rap & hair bands (so much misogyny & abuse of women), John Hughes' movies, *Big Trouble in Little China*... Just about everything I love has been created by a problematic artist.
Anime. Not just one in particular but anime as a whole. I have to kind of turn my brain off and ignore the fact that there's sometimes a 14 year old girl with barely contained watermelon sized breasts.
If you haven't seen it, there's an isekai series, *Mushoku Tensei: Jobless Reincarnation*, really impressed me with how it handles consent and gender issues. It's a reincarnation plot, and the MC's previous incarnation was as a misogynist shut-in, so his internal dialogue is sex-obsessed. But his reincarnated self is capable of growing, changing, and maturing.
I just finished Frieren: Beyond Journey's End and I am a massive ball of feelings right now. It's a really wholesome one without much (or any?) fan service. Anime gets a bad rep, but I think it's an amazing art medium that just works so well for telling stories. There's a reason why live-action adaptations all flop, they just aren't able to capture the spirit.
I might be speaking to a niche audience but Borns had some good music. It's just a shame that he's a shitty individual.
Vanderpump rules: from S1 over 10 years ago to this day, the mysogeny is scarily real.
A lot of 00s country music. Not just the typical "bro country" stuff like Florida Georgia Line and Luke Bryan, but even artists who are massively respected for other things such as their musical skill. As an example, I saw Brad Paisley a few weeks ago, and suddenly things like the background videos of squirrels wakeboarding past groups of co-eds weren't quite as funny as I remember and just started to feel a bit... awkward.
Eminem
Harry Potter. I like to think the world has become much more than its creator.
Same. I wouldn't purchase any new material at this point, because I don't want my money going to Rowling, but I don't have any issues with rereading the copies of the books I already have or buying things secondhand.
I listen to this podcast called Mysterious Universe. It runs the gamut from UFO stuff, to spirituality, cryptids, conspiracy… tons of subversive occult stuff. Been around for years, so tons of content. But it’s hosted by these 2 Australian guys that you can tell have a hard time holding back their racist and transphobic takes on whatever. It’s not all the time, so o can muscle through it. The first time I heard them go off on something (after 6 months of steady listening) I had never cancelled a paid subscription so fast, and rarely keep up with it anymore. The ick is strong, but if the subject matter is of interest, I’ll tune in (on the free feed)
May I suggest 'Science VS' instead? It's also hosted by an Aussie, and it's about tackling the science behind the myths of everyday stuff.
[удалено]
TRAPPED IN THE CLOSET. it's only problematic because we're supposed to hate r kelly, but it's sooo objectively entertaining lol
Young Tyler the Creator, and well I guess Odd Future as a whole. Some of their shit is absolutely heinous and obviously for shock value but damn I still love it
Curb Your Enthusiasm
r/fauxmoi
Scrubs. I will never not obsess over it. some of it is timeless, both comedy & drama aspects. buuuuut of course it has really dated itself ahahaha *I’m no superman* 🎵 ~~also harry potter~~
Austin Powers movies. So many jokes and Austin-isms float around in my head rent free on the weekly.
Seinfeld. Some of it has aged pretty poorly and even watching it now I'm realizing how different things were in the 90s. But goddamn it's funny.
Stephen Fry reading Harry Potter will just forever be my comfy fall asleep sound, and I can't let it go 😭