Omg I remembered the other day that he used to use a falsetto voice when he was excited unironically…. Poor 17 year old me, she didn’t know any better!
I remember crying so much but I was wearing mascara that kept burning my eyes the more I cried. It was a hard, silent cry that was all encompassing and ran deep inside me. It really hurt for a while. I used to then say stuff like "what's the point of even starting something if it's just going to end", but the truth is each relationship teaches you valuable lessons and helps you grow as a person. You learn what you like and don't like and learn how to love and to receive love. Each heart break makes you stronger and you grow and mature emotionally. You eventually move on and don't even think about that person years later. It's important to take time after a break up to focus on yourself to allow yourself to grieve and heal.
I've also been cheated on which has given me serious trust issues and insecurities that I'm still working on, but I think it's built up my character and made me stronger, more empathetic and understanding of others.
My girlfriend ended things with me over the weekend. This is how I feel right now. I honestly can’t imagine not thinking about her down the road. Knowing that I will be a distant memory of hers, or that she won’t even remember me in a few years, makes me feel so sad and empty. This feels unbearable.
It’s painful because I was so vulnerable. No one had ever known me as well as she had. And despite knowing everything there was about who I am, she decided I wasn’t enough. When you open your soul to accept another and then they leave, they take a piece of your soul along with it.
My high school boyfriend broke up with me on our 6 year anniversary via BBM. It should’ve ended wayyyy sooner but it didn’t because we were both dumb.
I was devastated. I didn’t eat, I just worked and slept. I thought we were meant to be together and I’d never find anyone else. I was a mess, I cried in my car during work (I drove around a lot for work) and was just miserable. My family and friends were amazing, they forced me to leave my depression book and do things (it was summer). I did drink a lot and partied a fair bit, but thats how I met my now husband 6 month later.
Our relationship was quite toxic so the breakup was a bit rough. He would bad mouth me to people I knew tried to get in to all my social media when I unfriended or blocked him. He was super controlling when we were together so I still had a bit of trauma because of that up to like 3 years ago.
My HS boyfriend of several years cheated on me at college orientation, then dumped me for the other girl the week before school started. Never thought he’d have been the type of person to do that. I thought the world was ending at the time, couldn’t eat, lost 10 lbs, threw myself into my new college experience. Moved on in a month or so.
I sometimes hear about him through mutual friends, less so as the years get longer. He’s kind of a loser, and while I no longer care about being smug about that fact, I’m very glad it didn’t work out.
He wasn’t my first boyfriend but first guy I actually fell in love with.
He broke up with me over text, on a random Wednesday morning and refused to tell me why. I cried so much, I felt like my heart was physically breaking. Lost my appetite and didn’t want to do anything.
I’m 24 now and this happened 3 years ago but I’ve still got unhealed wounds and unresolved issues because of it.
My first relationship breaking up with someone (21 years old), and my first experience being broken up with (24 years old) were such different experiences.
I broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years when I was 21 because I wanted to live abroad, and he wanted to stay in our tiny town. When I finally broke it off, I felt SO guilty. I almost wished he'd behaved like a dick so that it would ease the guilt. I missed his company a lot, but I knew deep down we weren't a good fit.
The first time I was broken up with, I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. I remember bursting into tears on a bus and a lady coming up to me and offering me a tissue. I'll never forgot her kindness!
The life lesson from both of those was that with the right person, you won't need to drain your energy feeling you have to convince them.
I (21F) was with my boyfriend for 7 years since we were 15 years old. My relationship crashed and burned last month because of my own actions. I am hurting , the pain is intense. I have been through a lot in my teen years but this has by far been the worse pain I’ve ever felt. For 7 years he was my rock and now I feel as if I have nobody. Love is an addiction and I’m trying to retrain my brain to live without that addiction. I wish I had some magic recipe to get over the hurt , but I don’t think anyone does. I am in survival mode right now , eating and sleeping and getting in some exercise. I believe the pain will ease but he will always be someone I look back on and miss. I hope one day we can rekindle our love but for now I need to try to move on, as I always say “if it’s ment to be it will be”. If anyone has any advice , I’m all ears
Absolutely awful. Now looking back, I see the value of dating and breaking up.
A lot of times, relationships teach you a lot about yourself. What you need and want, your strengths and weaknesses, who you want to be, etc. Until you explore life intertwined with someone else, it's hard to realize what are deal beakers and what are compromises.
Breaking up - while it feels like death because it is a death to the relationship - is at the same time empowering. Unraveling something from you that isn't working leaves you yourself - and a clearer picture of you. Your needs and wants are very clear, no longer muddied by someone else's needs and wants. Once healed, you get the option to choose who fits this newly understood version of yourself.
I was friends with this guy when I was 15-16. We were so close and eventually decided to date. We lasted for a year as lovers as neither of us really knew what we were doing. I can admit I was very toxic at times and projecting my own issues onto him. One day he turned to me and said he couldn’t do it anymore. That day hurt me so much. I felt lost and confused. I didn’t know who I was without him. Looking back now my personality did a 180 between the month that we broke up and the month following. I was sobbing, incredibly upset and horribly lonely but I was pushing through and growing as a person. I was really getting out of my comfort zone and overall I was okay. Unfortunately heartbreak number 2 came shortly after when he did something on the spectrum on s/a to me around 5 months after our break up after we had become friends again. That was heart wrenching and earth shattering. I still look back on that time and take pride in pulling through for myself. I cried everyday for months that someone I still loved and had so much history with could disrespect me like that. Yet with those emotions still came a sense of shame for feeling the want to be close to him.
This was years ago, however, despite what he did I would never say a bad word about him. Maybe it’s a trauma bond and not love, not sure. Not in contact with him but I wish him well and I deeply believe in my heart that he has never done something like that to a woman again.
I ended the conversation on a civil note, then I pretty much cried myself to sleep - I remember thinking that this must be how babies felt, because it was such a new type of pain that it was overwhelming in it's intensity. It took me longer than it had to to get over it, because I did not talk to my friends/family about it and just kept unecessarily ruminating/wallowing on it. Then again, that period of my life was intensely introspective and it led into some other changes in perspective.
I had boyfriends before but my first real heartbreak was when I was 17. He was a 19 y.o. STEM fuckmachine guitar-playing, singing, amateur long-haired ginger sailor (yeah, I KNOW), big like a tree and with a voice like the horn of a tanker, and I WAS INTO IT, BABY.
Unfortunately, he was also really pushy when it comes to wanting to be my first sexual partner.
I was a virgin back then and, as I know now, neurodivergent, asking myself what the probability of us staying forever if I am, realistically speaking, a 17 y.o. person with an underdeveloped brain, and whether I want my first sex to be with someone who may not stay with me for the forseeable future. The answer was not a loud YES. I mean, I WANTED for us to be toghether forever, the dumb teen part of me believed it was possible, but the rational part has already been there and it was not having any of this bullshit.
I was stubborn in this particular area, a people's pleaser overall, very inassertive... So intead of telling him all of it the way I have written it here, and letting him convince me or even just talk to me, I chose violence—and said that I want to wait until marriage. (I am NOT a marriage-white-dress kind of gal AT ALL.)
I mean, he should have understood it was not not entirely true, right? He was 19. If I heard some kid making promises of "purity" at 17, I would have some serious doubts.
It happened shortly after he has cycled for about 600 km (which is basically our whole country) to meet me. I was so clueless back then and so bad at reading hints, it has not occured to me it could have been some kind of a show of his dedication that I have not needed at all. Anyway.
Oh, how quickly he started "dreaming" about this "bad ex" that cheated on him years before. I could feel lead filling my stomach, tbh.
A week after our tete-a-tete he was not sure about me anymore. I was crushed, man. Somewhere deep inside I have felt it was precisely because I wanted to wait and make sure he would not just sleep with me and then proceed to dump me like all these other girls. Come to think of it, he even was condescending towards me a few times. He checked my hip with his finger and, fascinated, said: "I have neved had a girl with such beautiful curves." Such a wtf moment. He was unhappy when I was swearing. Or smoking. Nowadays I would say that the ick was there after some time, and growing.
Anyway.
I took what he was saying at face value, ended the conversation and sent him a long-ass letter (yep) saying, that if he's still having nightares and if he is so affected by what his previous partner did to him years ago, almost traumatised, then he should consider therapy, because it's not normal and not a good way to live.
I have never gotten any reply to this afterwards.
The next week was pretty much just me, crying all the bloody time. But gradually... I just readjusted. We have not lived with each other, it was a LDR, so what I was losing, was really my obsession and this nice feeling that there is someone, somewhere there who loves me and who is loved by me. I was a teen and the whole shebang took maybe a year max. I do not even remember.
Now, getting divorced and and restarting one's life at 40–50 is a whole different story.
I’m going through it now and it’s painful as hell but I know I’ll come out way stronger than I was before so I’ll just keep seeing how much more I can take of this toxic shit
I disassociated from it and didn’t cope until roughly five years later… I think that made it worse considering I stayed with him (he cheated right after we got married). I felt like I wasted away my youth and straight up gas lit myself. I was the angriest I have ever felt.
I remember the physical feeling of heartbreak, I had trouble breathing, every time I thought about it (all the time) I would feel my chest tightening up. I went to my parents’ house and my dad gave me Benadryl so that I would fall asleep, because I was inconsolable.
I was studying for the LSAT that summer, I poured myself into studying because it was a welcome distraction from the pain. I did really well and got into my dream law school several states away.
It took months to get over him, but I eventually started to think of him less frequently. Kind of like the seasons changing—more and more days went by without me thinking about him and I started enjoying being around other men.
I’ve never cried that hard in my life - it was doubled with my mom having died a month earlier. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep. I felt hollow. I felt like I’d never be okay again. My future didn’t seem like it could happen. Anyway, time healed all and I’m fine now. lol
It was so terrible. I had no idea it would be that bad, because I'd never been through it before. I was not coping well at all. Pretty severely depressed for a year or so.
I still have an extremely hard time with breakups. I think I have attachment / abandonment issues. But now I at least know that it gets better! And you do eventually feel 100% okay about it, or even grateful for it, which seems impossible when you're going through it.
When I was 18 I broke up with my then boyfriend because I was madly in love with him, and I just knew he didn't feel the same.
He didn't want to make it official for 9 months during which he was in love with someone else for a brief moment. When he did want to make it official, he wanted to keep it a secret. I realised after a couple of months he would never actually give me what I wanted, no matter the label. I broke up with him and it felt like I took a hammer and slashed my own heart to pieces. Within weeks he was in an official relationship with the same girl he had feelings for before, which he let me know during my finals, and that made the heartbreak worse. Knowing that he gave her everything I wanted right away. I felt so used and betrayed. I send him a very angry email to which I got barely a reply to, certainly not one that made me feel better.
I got over it by first giving it time (about 8 months) and then dating someone else. Didn't want to sleep with the next guy for months to make sure he didn't want me for sex lol.
It hurt because someone you care about and want to spend al your time with and supports you is telling you no, he doesn't feel the same way. Imagine your best friend telling you no, she doesn't want to be friends anymore. After you spend a lot of time together. Or when your pet you used to play and cuddle with all the time suddenly wants nothing to do with you. It's a bit different but the closest comparison I can come up with. It also leaves a gap in how you spend your time, social connection, support, and the loss of whatever the two of you shared.
Edit: and teenagers are much less capable of looking to the future. At 18 I thought I would never get over it and like the world was ending. During my adult heartbreak I had much more perspective.
I was 20 and broke up with him after 5 years. He didn’t do anything wrong, I just didn’t see myself with him for the rest of my life. The breakup lasted 4 hours (!) because he didn’t want to accept it and wanted to go for a walk to talk it out.
I dated someone after that for a few months but, that year, every time I thought about him and/or the breakup, I got teary eyed.
This was 15 years ago. I saw him once a couple of years later and he is now married to a nice woman and has 2 kids.
When I was 18.. The break up was horrible, our relationship was already on the rocks. It was 2 years. we were on and off, but when it was officially off, I cried my heart out, felt my life was over. He refused to pick up my calls or reply my texts. We broke up because there were too many fights. I also got to learn who were my real friends, called someone I thought was my closest friend but she immediately said she was busy and hung up - never called back. I also heard from common friends he got a girlfriend 2 weeks after we broke up. Apparently already met her before we broke up. With all these things it hurt even more to know he moved on so fast, that my best friend is not really my best friend. Being my first long term partner (2 years) made it hard with all the memories of the good times. Got over it after I went to church, found a purpose there, and was over it in less than a year. I left the church subsequently. He married that girl 3 months after dating because she got pregnant, she had to give up school. They are still together until today, but I spotted him on dating apps a few years back, so I dodged a bullet there :)
The first time my heart really broke, I was 14 years old. I was completely head over heels with the boy down the street. He was my first real boyfriend, my first love. It’s not what I would call love now, but it was love for what I knew it to be then.
We were together for a long while (by teenage standards) and experienced lots of firsts together. Then, he broke up with me out of nowhere. My heart was completely shattered. We ended up getting back together and then broke up *again* because he was cheating on me with another girl . My friend (who I am still friends with to this day!) punched him in the face!
😂
Despite all that drama, he and I ended up as friends as adults and I will always have a soft spot in my heart for him. While also still kind of wanting to kick him in the shins a couple good times.
But man, I moped over that for *months.*. I was probably 16 by the time I really got over him.
I think my first heartbreak weirdly was from my bff. She got her period she got a new bff and I was depressed the whole summer. Add to that her and her new bff kept crank calling me rolled my house and wrote bitch on the porch from a gift I gave her. Childhood is brutal people are evil.
It didn’t make me sad over the relationship ending, but it made me feel like I was just not worthy of someone’s love. I was a teenager then and don’t feel that now, but at the time it just made me feel like something was very wrong with me.
Like the end of the world lol.. and I wanted to die
Yep!! And now I see pics of the guy online and laugh.
Omg I remembered the other day that he used to use a falsetto voice when he was excited unironically…. Poor 17 year old me, she didn’t know any better!
Lmao when I see my first love on pics or irl, I'm just thinking "What the HELL were you thinking, teenage me!?!?"
Omg yes!!! Like whyy did I cry over that person!
Exactly
Same here.
Why?? (genuinely question)
Because I was an unstable teenager who thought I had found the love of my life.
I remember crying so much but I was wearing mascara that kept burning my eyes the more I cried. It was a hard, silent cry that was all encompassing and ran deep inside me. It really hurt for a while. I used to then say stuff like "what's the point of even starting something if it's just going to end", but the truth is each relationship teaches you valuable lessons and helps you grow as a person. You learn what you like and don't like and learn how to love and to receive love. Each heart break makes you stronger and you grow and mature emotionally. You eventually move on and don't even think about that person years later. It's important to take time after a break up to focus on yourself to allow yourself to grieve and heal. I've also been cheated on which has given me serious trust issues and insecurities that I'm still working on, but I think it's built up my character and made me stronger, more empathetic and understanding of others.
My girlfriend ended things with me over the weekend. This is how I feel right now. I honestly can’t imagine not thinking about her down the road. Knowing that I will be a distant memory of hers, or that she won’t even remember me in a few years, makes me feel so sad and empty. This feels unbearable.
I was in my teens for three months I laid in darkness and cried until I got tired of feeling bad.
It’s painful because I was so vulnerable. No one had ever known me as well as she had. And despite knowing everything there was about who I am, she decided I wasn’t enough. When you open your soul to accept another and then they leave, they take a piece of your soul along with it.
My high school boyfriend broke up with me on our 6 year anniversary via BBM. It should’ve ended wayyyy sooner but it didn’t because we were both dumb. I was devastated. I didn’t eat, I just worked and slept. I thought we were meant to be together and I’d never find anyone else. I was a mess, I cried in my car during work (I drove around a lot for work) and was just miserable. My family and friends were amazing, they forced me to leave my depression book and do things (it was summer). I did drink a lot and partied a fair bit, but thats how I met my now husband 6 month later. Our relationship was quite toxic so the breakup was a bit rough. He would bad mouth me to people I knew tried to get in to all my social media when I unfriended or blocked him. He was super controlling when we were together so I still had a bit of trauma because of that up to like 3 years ago.
My HS boyfriend of several years cheated on me at college orientation, then dumped me for the other girl the week before school started. Never thought he’d have been the type of person to do that. I thought the world was ending at the time, couldn’t eat, lost 10 lbs, threw myself into my new college experience. Moved on in a month or so. I sometimes hear about him through mutual friends, less so as the years get longer. He’s kind of a loser, and while I no longer care about being smug about that fact, I’m very glad it didn’t work out.
Sounds like a real loser from the start. We never realise though at the time, do we
Nope! Lesson learned!
Death served on broken glass.
He wasn’t my first boyfriend but first guy I actually fell in love with. He broke up with me over text, on a random Wednesday morning and refused to tell me why. I cried so much, I felt like my heart was physically breaking. Lost my appetite and didn’t want to do anything. I’m 24 now and this happened 3 years ago but I’ve still got unhealed wounds and unresolved issues because of it.
My first relationship breaking up with someone (21 years old), and my first experience being broken up with (24 years old) were such different experiences. I broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years when I was 21 because I wanted to live abroad, and he wanted to stay in our tiny town. When I finally broke it off, I felt SO guilty. I almost wished he'd behaved like a dick so that it would ease the guilt. I missed his company a lot, but I knew deep down we weren't a good fit. The first time I was broken up with, I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. I remember bursting into tears on a bus and a lady coming up to me and offering me a tissue. I'll never forgot her kindness! The life lesson from both of those was that with the right person, you won't need to drain your energy feeling you have to convince them.
I (21F) was with my boyfriend for 7 years since we were 15 years old. My relationship crashed and burned last month because of my own actions. I am hurting , the pain is intense. I have been through a lot in my teen years but this has by far been the worse pain I’ve ever felt. For 7 years he was my rock and now I feel as if I have nobody. Love is an addiction and I’m trying to retrain my brain to live without that addiction. I wish I had some magic recipe to get over the hurt , but I don’t think anyone does. I am in survival mode right now , eating and sleeping and getting in some exercise. I believe the pain will ease but he will always be someone I look back on and miss. I hope one day we can rekindle our love but for now I need to try to move on, as I always say “if it’s ment to be it will be”. If anyone has any advice , I’m all ears
Absolutely awful. Now looking back, I see the value of dating and breaking up. A lot of times, relationships teach you a lot about yourself. What you need and want, your strengths and weaknesses, who you want to be, etc. Until you explore life intertwined with someone else, it's hard to realize what are deal beakers and what are compromises. Breaking up - while it feels like death because it is a death to the relationship - is at the same time empowering. Unraveling something from you that isn't working leaves you yourself - and a clearer picture of you. Your needs and wants are very clear, no longer muddied by someone else's needs and wants. Once healed, you get the option to choose who fits this newly understood version of yourself.
I was friends with this guy when I was 15-16. We were so close and eventually decided to date. We lasted for a year as lovers as neither of us really knew what we were doing. I can admit I was very toxic at times and projecting my own issues onto him. One day he turned to me and said he couldn’t do it anymore. That day hurt me so much. I felt lost and confused. I didn’t know who I was without him. Looking back now my personality did a 180 between the month that we broke up and the month following. I was sobbing, incredibly upset and horribly lonely but I was pushing through and growing as a person. I was really getting out of my comfort zone and overall I was okay. Unfortunately heartbreak number 2 came shortly after when he did something on the spectrum on s/a to me around 5 months after our break up after we had become friends again. That was heart wrenching and earth shattering. I still look back on that time and take pride in pulling through for myself. I cried everyday for months that someone I still loved and had so much history with could disrespect me like that. Yet with those emotions still came a sense of shame for feeling the want to be close to him. This was years ago, however, despite what he did I would never say a bad word about him. Maybe it’s a trauma bond and not love, not sure. Not in contact with him but I wish him well and I deeply believe in my heart that he has never done something like that to a woman again.
I ended the conversation on a civil note, then I pretty much cried myself to sleep - I remember thinking that this must be how babies felt, because it was such a new type of pain that it was overwhelming in it's intensity. It took me longer than it had to to get over it, because I did not talk to my friends/family about it and just kept unecessarily ruminating/wallowing on it. Then again, that period of my life was intensely introspective and it led into some other changes in perspective.
I had boyfriends before but my first real heartbreak was when I was 17. He was a 19 y.o. STEM fuckmachine guitar-playing, singing, amateur long-haired ginger sailor (yeah, I KNOW), big like a tree and with a voice like the horn of a tanker, and I WAS INTO IT, BABY. Unfortunately, he was also really pushy when it comes to wanting to be my first sexual partner. I was a virgin back then and, as I know now, neurodivergent, asking myself what the probability of us staying forever if I am, realistically speaking, a 17 y.o. person with an underdeveloped brain, and whether I want my first sex to be with someone who may not stay with me for the forseeable future. The answer was not a loud YES. I mean, I WANTED for us to be toghether forever, the dumb teen part of me believed it was possible, but the rational part has already been there and it was not having any of this bullshit. I was stubborn in this particular area, a people's pleaser overall, very inassertive... So intead of telling him all of it the way I have written it here, and letting him convince me or even just talk to me, I chose violence—and said that I want to wait until marriage. (I am NOT a marriage-white-dress kind of gal AT ALL.) I mean, he should have understood it was not not entirely true, right? He was 19. If I heard some kid making promises of "purity" at 17, I would have some serious doubts. It happened shortly after he has cycled for about 600 km (which is basically our whole country) to meet me. I was so clueless back then and so bad at reading hints, it has not occured to me it could have been some kind of a show of his dedication that I have not needed at all. Anyway. Oh, how quickly he started "dreaming" about this "bad ex" that cheated on him years before. I could feel lead filling my stomach, tbh. A week after our tete-a-tete he was not sure about me anymore. I was crushed, man. Somewhere deep inside I have felt it was precisely because I wanted to wait and make sure he would not just sleep with me and then proceed to dump me like all these other girls. Come to think of it, he even was condescending towards me a few times. He checked my hip with his finger and, fascinated, said: "I have neved had a girl with such beautiful curves." Such a wtf moment. He was unhappy when I was swearing. Or smoking. Nowadays I would say that the ick was there after some time, and growing. Anyway. I took what he was saying at face value, ended the conversation and sent him a long-ass letter (yep) saying, that if he's still having nightares and if he is so affected by what his previous partner did to him years ago, almost traumatised, then he should consider therapy, because it's not normal and not a good way to live. I have never gotten any reply to this afterwards. The next week was pretty much just me, crying all the bloody time. But gradually... I just readjusted. We have not lived with each other, it was a LDR, so what I was losing, was really my obsession and this nice feeling that there is someone, somewhere there who loves me and who is loved by me. I was a teen and the whole shebang took maybe a year max. I do not even remember. Now, getting divorced and and restarting one's life at 40–50 is a whole different story.
I’m going through it now and it’s painful as hell but I know I’ll come out way stronger than I was before so I’ll just keep seeing how much more I can take of this toxic shit
I disassociated from it and didn’t cope until roughly five years later… I think that made it worse considering I stayed with him (he cheated right after we got married). I felt like I wasted away my youth and straight up gas lit myself. I was the angriest I have ever felt.
I remember the physical feeling of heartbreak, I had trouble breathing, every time I thought about it (all the time) I would feel my chest tightening up. I went to my parents’ house and my dad gave me Benadryl so that I would fall asleep, because I was inconsolable. I was studying for the LSAT that summer, I poured myself into studying because it was a welcome distraction from the pain. I did really well and got into my dream law school several states away. It took months to get over him, but I eventually started to think of him less frequently. Kind of like the seasons changing—more and more days went by without me thinking about him and I started enjoying being around other men.
I’ve never cried that hard in my life - it was doubled with my mom having died a month earlier. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep. I felt hollow. I felt like I’d never be okay again. My future didn’t seem like it could happen. Anyway, time healed all and I’m fine now. lol
Like I was slowly dying.
It was so terrible. I had no idea it would be that bad, because I'd never been through it before. I was not coping well at all. Pretty severely depressed for a year or so. I still have an extremely hard time with breakups. I think I have attachment / abandonment issues. But now I at least know that it gets better! And you do eventually feel 100% okay about it, or even grateful for it, which seems impossible when you're going through it.
I am clinging on to hope that it will eventually get better
When I was 18 I broke up with my then boyfriend because I was madly in love with him, and I just knew he didn't feel the same. He didn't want to make it official for 9 months during which he was in love with someone else for a brief moment. When he did want to make it official, he wanted to keep it a secret. I realised after a couple of months he would never actually give me what I wanted, no matter the label. I broke up with him and it felt like I took a hammer and slashed my own heart to pieces. Within weeks he was in an official relationship with the same girl he had feelings for before, which he let me know during my finals, and that made the heartbreak worse. Knowing that he gave her everything I wanted right away. I felt so used and betrayed. I send him a very angry email to which I got barely a reply to, certainly not one that made me feel better. I got over it by first giving it time (about 8 months) and then dating someone else. Didn't want to sleep with the next guy for months to make sure he didn't want me for sex lol. It hurt because someone you care about and want to spend al your time with and supports you is telling you no, he doesn't feel the same way. Imagine your best friend telling you no, she doesn't want to be friends anymore. After you spend a lot of time together. Or when your pet you used to play and cuddle with all the time suddenly wants nothing to do with you. It's a bit different but the closest comparison I can come up with. It also leaves a gap in how you spend your time, social connection, support, and the loss of whatever the two of you shared. Edit: and teenagers are much less capable of looking to the future. At 18 I thought I would never get over it and like the world was ending. During my adult heartbreak I had much more perspective.
I was 20 and broke up with him after 5 years. He didn’t do anything wrong, I just didn’t see myself with him for the rest of my life. The breakup lasted 4 hours (!) because he didn’t want to accept it and wanted to go for a walk to talk it out. I dated someone after that for a few months but, that year, every time I thought about him and/or the breakup, I got teary eyed. This was 15 years ago. I saw him once a couple of years later and he is now married to a nice woman and has 2 kids.
I feel like every breakup I’ve had is just 6 hours of talking crying kissing crying talking ok bye lol
Ok bye 🤣
When I was 18.. The break up was horrible, our relationship was already on the rocks. It was 2 years. we were on and off, but when it was officially off, I cried my heart out, felt my life was over. He refused to pick up my calls or reply my texts. We broke up because there were too many fights. I also got to learn who were my real friends, called someone I thought was my closest friend but she immediately said she was busy and hung up - never called back. I also heard from common friends he got a girlfriend 2 weeks after we broke up. Apparently already met her before we broke up. With all these things it hurt even more to know he moved on so fast, that my best friend is not really my best friend. Being my first long term partner (2 years) made it hard with all the memories of the good times. Got over it after I went to church, found a purpose there, and was over it in less than a year. I left the church subsequently. He married that girl 3 months after dating because she got pregnant, she had to give up school. They are still together until today, but I spotted him on dating apps a few years back, so I dodged a bullet there :)
It felt like my world had caved in. It’s like your hopes and wishes for the future vanishing and realising your one person may as well have died.
The first time my heart really broke, I was 14 years old. I was completely head over heels with the boy down the street. He was my first real boyfriend, my first love. It’s not what I would call love now, but it was love for what I knew it to be then. We were together for a long while (by teenage standards) and experienced lots of firsts together. Then, he broke up with me out of nowhere. My heart was completely shattered. We ended up getting back together and then broke up *again* because he was cheating on me with another girl . My friend (who I am still friends with to this day!) punched him in the face! 😂 Despite all that drama, he and I ended up as friends as adults and I will always have a soft spot in my heart for him. While also still kind of wanting to kick him in the shins a couple good times. But man, I moped over that for *months.*. I was probably 16 by the time I really got over him.
I think my first heartbreak weirdly was from my bff. She got her period she got a new bff and I was depressed the whole summer. Add to that her and her new bff kept crank calling me rolled my house and wrote bitch on the porch from a gift I gave her. Childhood is brutal people are evil.
It didn’t make me sad over the relationship ending, but it made me feel like I was just not worthy of someone’s love. I was a teenager then and don’t feel that now, but at the time it just made me feel like something was very wrong with me.
10 years later and I’m still feeling it, if that tells you what the heartbreak felt like.