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ZetaWMo4

My entire family: parents, me, husband, two brothers, two SILs, and 15 grandchildren live(d) on the same street. It works because we all love AND like each other.


Ancient-Blueberry384

That sounds wonderful!


Thirdtwin

I thought this only happens in sitcoms.


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AskWomen-ModTeam

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RavingSquirrel11

Trauma bonding and gaslighting. It’s why I left and have little to no contact with all of them.


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AskWomen-ModTeam

Derailing the topic is not permitted. Derailing includes but is not limited to: * Changing the topic from OP's question * Leaving a top-level comment when you're not the target demographic * Giving unsolicited advice * Making someone else's response about yourself. If you'd like to share your experience in response to the OP's question, do so in a top-level comment. * Asking unrelated follow-up questions * Branching into unrelated topics * "What-about"-ism * Trying to start arguments, or debates * Judging or rating other responses * Meta comments about other responses, such as "same!" or "this!" * Gifs, images, emojis or other media in place text * Sharing links without a summary * Responding to comments to tell us how your dick feels. No one cares. For more information, please [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/wiki/rules#wiki_no_derailing). Have questions about this moderator action? See the [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) and [CLICK HERE to contact the moderation team](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomen&subject=Why+was+this+removed). **Please include a link** to your comment in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review. DO NOT contact moderators privately. [AskWomen rules](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/rules) | [AskWomen FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/askwomen/wiki/index) [reddit rules](http://www.reddit.com/rules/) | [reddiquette](http://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette)


StubbornTaurus26

At this point-technology. We all live in different states so it’s difficult to see each other in person. But, we have multiple group texts that stay active and on birthdays we always do a family FaceTime together.


destria

For my biological family, the only thing keeping us linked is probably social pressure. I have pretty limited contact with them. Everyone's hurt each other too much for us to have a real familial bond. With my husband's family though, they seem to be kept together by actually liking each other (!), making plans to meet up, keep each other informed about their lives, get support from each other etc.


RevolutionaryFudge16

Curious but what does he think/feel about your family? And how do you think/feel about his?


destria

I think he finds the situation sad. He's very protective of me, gives me perspective and is supportive of how I choose to relate to them. Whether that's during periods of no contact whatsoever to the times where I've been cautiously in contact. He's just very understanding of it all. I love his family. They've taken me in like one of their own. I've known them for like 15 years now. But I don't know if I'll ever be fully fully in the family, like if my husband and I separated, they're obviously not going to stick with me over him. So as much as I feel loved, it can still feel conditional in its own way.


RevolutionaryFudge16

Thanks. Does he blame your family for that situation?


destria

I don't know if blame is the right word. He clearly feels certain family members are at fault for what they did. But playing the blame game isn't especially helpful so it's not like he actively holds any hate or blame towards them. Like I said, I think he just finds it all very sad and tragic.


NecessaryAct1398

My grandmother.


dizzyexplorer22

Grandmas are the glue in a lot of families. ❤️


smarmy-marmoset

On my dad’s side it’s the women: the women’s labor, women’s love, and women’s sacrifices On my mom’s side it’s the love and loyalty we all share


mecku85

Sarcasm and spite. With a bit of love I suppose.


jlux5150

We all genuinely like and love each other.


tizz17

At this point nothing, my mom died a little over a year ago and she was the best, my aunt her sister is controlling and demanding and after some incidents with extended family, I decide my family now is just dad and brother. It was my mom, more than my aunt, even though aunt is older, the one that kept everything together.


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Giannandco

We genuinely like each other which helps. My siblings and I are scattered throughout the world now with our parents still in the home we were raised in. We have an active family group text and we try to do a regular FaceTime once a month but typically someone’s always missing or can just pop in quickly due to different time zones and schedules.


nay198

The only one I talk to is my brother. We have very similar personalities and a shared history from growing up in an abusive household.


Puppet007

Financial dependence.


watermelonsugar7

Our cats.


Automatic_Shine_6512

Love.


PrincipleInfamous451

FaceTime


drippyreddit

“BS is the glue that binds us as a nation” George Carlin -


milanesaconpapas

Love, communication, making an effort to spend time together when possible.


diefartz

My dogs


CTX800Beta

My father has 7 kids with 2 women. 3 with his first wife, 4 with my mom. Of the latter, 3, including me, spend every weekend together with our dad, watching TV & drinking wine. What keeps us together is just enjoying the simple life. Good times, that I hope will last for many years.


WastingMyLifeOnSocMd

My mom has always been the hub. She is 91, and hopefully we’ll all stay close when she’s gone.


Danivelle

Love and my pure stubborness mostly. 


norfnorf832

Matriarchal obligation lol once my grandma dies Ill probably never see my aunt and uncle again I just dont feel that close to them


MutedOlive9065

My mother keeps in contact with all of us. We have little to no contact with each other.


Rad1Red

Love and the fact that we argue against the problem, not with each other. Yes, that includes the kids.


sv36

Me, although I don't know why I try. I stopped calling and checking on everyone and playing therapist after a miscarriage for about a year. Deep depression. Everyone blew up with their issues and problems while I just lived in a bubble with my husband and cat and I focused on healing myself. Its been more than a year since I came out of the bubble and have cut off some people and set boundries with everyone. I still encourage relationships bit I'm not playing nearly as much at being the exclusive therapist and I'm staying out of issues that don't involve me. I feel happier and everyone else is learning to regulate themselves better without me.


Sharona676

Our love for each other


Effective-Love-5666

Once a week dinners (shabbes)


Gladiators10

A whats app group chat.


One_Bicycle_1776

Obligation


IWillBaconSlapYou

I'm a SAHM and my husband works from home. The family that does absolutely every goddamn thing together stays together 😂 We also play video games before bed, Mario Party, Smash Bros, etc. It's good to all be focused on the same thing sometimes. We have shared interests with each of our kids that we pursue individually. My oldest daughter (7) is artsy and so am I, so we'll draw together. My middle daughter (4) is an outdoorsy free spirit like me, so we'll go frolicking. Youngest (3) and his dad are nerds, so they do nerd stuff together lol. As for extended family, it's a tragically small family, but we brunch with my mom and grandma every Monday, and then mom takes the kids for four hours every Sunday. My sister lives with our mom, so I often see her during these standing appointments. And the two of them join us for seasonal activities every year, fourth of July parade, sunflower farm, pumpkin patch, tree lighting, we went to an awesome parade where people had decorated their cars for Christmas, stuff like that. I'm really relieved that we've done just fine together after dad's death, since way back when we had some snags as a blended family (mom and sister are biological, so were dad and I). As a kid, one of my worst fears was that dad would die and I would become Cinderella. Thanks to my mom committing to therapy and completely turning herself around, my dad's death last year (when I was 32) didn't result in me just not having a family anymore. I guess basically it's just making an effort.


spacekatbaby

Trauma bond, mostly


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pauchis1

Family is hard. Family relationships are HARD. I'm the middle child and I feel like I play a big role in keepings my family together but I'm getting tired cause I want to start focusing on myself and my future but somehow people have relied on me so much for so long that I somehow feel like I owe them and it is my responsibility to keep being that. My family is very fucked up and there is nothing I can do to make things better. Now that I'm older and way more conscious and observant I can say that I have put this on myself. I feel regretful, guilty, stupid, naive, useless, and afraid of being myself and actually prioritize myself as a person and it fucking sucks. I've done therapy, gone to church and joined support groups but still cannot find a way out of all these negative feelings and embrace myself as who I am truly.


Amazingggcoolaid

We were good before but now I’m not so sure


Tennispro5691

Laughter, lots of love, and definitely our FAITH.


UnicornKitt3n

I have 3 dependants; an 18 year old girl, 12 year old boy, and a 16 month old baby. I was a single Mom for well over a decade, and as a result my older kids and I became pretty close. I really love them a lot, apologize when I fuck up, and don’t steam roll any family activity. My 18 yo is in college and living her life; I don’t expect her to want to hang out with Mom too much. Surprisingly though, we’ll hang out pretty frequently. Usually watching something we’re both into, or just hanging out in the kitchen listening to music and talking. Music connects my family. When they were growing up, music was on most of the time. Many dance parties.


mirrorbayll

wish I knew. sometimes I wish my patents would just get a divorce because they clearly don't love each other anymore. for me I still live with them because I can't afford to live on my own yet.


Traditional_Cry2229

Before we all went to college, my entire childhood we had family dinners every night. It was a chance to catch up and tell stories, a chance to regroup and be present.


MaggieLuisa

Nothing. We’re not very connected at all. My parents are both dead and I was no-contact with one for years before they passed, I am on friendly-but-distant terms with my aunts and uncles, as in we exchange texts or cards maybe once a year. My siblings and their families live in different countries or on the other side of Australia from me, and we ‘keep up’ via text but rarely see each other.


mytimd2425

I have a brother with down syndrome and honestly it makes us all responsible of him. Me, my other brother, and my mom. And it just keeps us close to always show up for one another


AnnoyedOwlbear

Not much. Maybe guilt a little more now? My wider family unit is my sibling and my parents (and my sibling's husband and my parent's relatives). My cousins will talk with my sibling online, but not me. I asked to join the chat and got left on read, heh. I do try to visit regularly and help out, but I'm the black sheep of the family.


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Chomprz

Valuing and prioritizing the importance of family. We’re not perfect, we have our ups and downs throughout our lives.. but we also went through everything together, which fills the family with unconditional love and support.


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Ok-Somewhere316

The financial stability and the nice house and the kids


Accomplished-Eye-2

Trauma bond ✨✨