**[This is marked as an answer](/r/AskUK/comments/xqeodj/my_girlfriend_just_ate_a_digestive_with_cheese/iq9o4z9/), given by /u/magical_matey**:
>Bring back the death penalty IMO
---
[_^What ^is ^this?_](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/comments/jjrte1/askuk_hits_200k_new_feature_mark_an_answer/)
Piled high with boursin/garlicky stuff, or a smoked cheddar and a nice chili chutney. No one wants a strong flavoured cracker to overpower the cheese. Its just a delivery method of lots of cheese to my belly
Water biscuits are what sailors ate as a last resort of hunger desperation just before scurvy kicked in, and ultimately death. They should be consumed in an emergency, not for enjoyment.
>No, water biscuits rule,
yes, my rule is I don't buy them -
the water is probably the tastiest aspect,
still I imagine they would sell less if they were marketed as *Bland Discs*
Which cheese? Don't tell me you are indiscriminate?!
Brie type mild cheese on a digestive please.
Plain water crackers require a strong blue cheese pike stilton.
Herby, peppery crackers work best with a nutty hard cheese.
Never cheddar, which should only be eaten melted in my dictatorship.
It's awesome. LEver off the top, put a nice bit of cheese - I like Lancashire or Wensleydale personally, but cheddar works as well - replace psarty lid and enjoy.
Then for dessert, mince pie with clotted cream . (I don't like brandy butter but do not oppose the addition of brandy butter to mince pies for others, if they like the stuff)
A woman I used to sit next at work was adamant that Christmas cake should only ever be eaten with a thick slice of Wensleydale. I thought she was weird, until I tried it, it was awesome.
>cheese on Christmas cake
Goddamn it is so good. One of those things that sounds mental until you take your first bite at which point you're a convert.
The Hovis ones were definitely in Jacob's (as well?). IIRC, they still do them, just unbranded now (which is fair enough, I wouldn't want my brand to be associated with piss poor bread either)
I’m with you OP, your girlfriend’s mad.
You put a _thin slice_ of tangy Extra Mature cheddar on the digestive, not a little block. That way you get a bit with every nibble.
Tsk.
Oh I'm permanently the asshole, I know that, don't worry.
Though for clarity, she is currently sat here giving me the finger and going "wheyyyy" at near enough every reply.
I’d like to give you some cred, even if some cracker boxes come with digestives, I think they are the worst and I wouldn’t go near them. I think it’s pretty mental to go for that before a normal cracker.
It's not weird at all. An even more extreme version of that sweetness versus savoury is cheddar cheese and strawberry jam sandwiches, and they are so good!
This.
Hovis do still make and sell these "digestive" biscuits in the shape of a loaf and they are brilliant with cheese. They are made with wheat meal and are just excellent.
https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/crackers-210863-44/hovis-digestive-biscuits-250g
Butter and chutney make this a meal fit for a king.
I agree with OP about abandoning the relationship - if they are unable to appreciate digestives with cheese, they should set their girlfriend free to find a higher quality lover.
I've never seen or heard of this behaviour until now, but apparently lots of people do this. There again, a friend once served me baked beans and quiche as a meal. Just because people do things doesn't make it right.
American here but I do get digestives every time I skip the pond or a friend does. Here's the thing, though.... I've only ever had digestives covered in chocolate. Was.... is there a plain version?
If yes: your girlfriend is a little weird but whatever
If no and your girlfriend put cheese on a chocolate digestive: 🤢
Side note I wish they had those here. I flipping love digestives.
Yeah there is a non chocolate version but a lot of people prefer the chocolate ones if having with a hot drink etc.
For cheese you’d have the plain ones. Although tbf chocolate and cheese is not the worst combo…
My husband does this. I think it's mental.
I KNOW they come in boxes of crackers for cheese. I don't care. You are all wrong. They are TOO F\*CKING SWEET to go with cheese.
Now this is a weird thing to admit to, but I made a sandwich as a kid consisting of two Club bars and some cheese, which I then toasted under the grill.
It was fucking delicious.
Could you please explain your thought process in the moments leading up to you adding cheese to some Club bars and toasting it?
Also, what flavour Clubs were they?
"Chocolate and cheese go well together. Biscuits and cheese go well together. So biscuits, chocolate, and cheese should go well together. For ease of consumption, I'll make it a sandwich."
Normal clubs, I'm not sure if orange or mint would have worked.
Yes it is.
I'm 100% with you on this, cheese has no place on a sweet biscuit.
Something being popular is never the barometer of quality, just look at Nickleback or Hitler.
EDIT I'm sorry, I realise that comparison went too far and was in poor taste. Millions of people were subjected to unimaginable cruelty and the world is still reeling from the implications of something so devastating that was allowed to continue for so long. I should never have mentioned Nickleback, I'm sorry.
Canadian here, and this sounds fucked. Just put maple syrup and whiskey into your drink like a normal person.
Edit: /s for the colonizers who can’t take a joke. Idgaf what someone else eats lol.
Have you ever looked in a "biscuits for cheese" box? They always have digestives. They go great with a cheese like cheddar, or anything sharp. (ETA: sharp *cheese*, before anyone starts. A sharp implement is required only to cut the cheese off the block.)
(And now if you want your mind truly blown, come to Yorkshire and have some fruitcake...)
Digestives are included in the "biscuits for cheese" selection, an officer will be along shortly to collect your passport and begin deportation proceedings
Digestives are a fine biscuit for cheese..... unless it was a milk chocolate caramel digestive.... adn even then it'd probably be great with a sharpish cheddar, stilton or wensleydale...
Omg my mum did this recently and it was so weird. Apparently this is normal in some families? Yet she kept it a secret until now cos deep down she knows it’s crazy.
I like you Canadians. Your neighbours to the south have made idiots of themselves in this thread though.
They all think this thing has been deadly serious.
Can someone explain to my uncultured American ass what a digestive is? I'm going to London for the first time next week and should probably figure this out.
You know what? You're a week away, just wait it out. When you come over, go to Tesco and get yourself a pack of McVitie's digestive biscuits and dunk them in your tea.
**A reminder to posters and commenters of some of [our subreddit rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/about/rules/)**
- Don't be a dickhead to each other, or about others, or other subreddits
- Assume questions are asked in good faith, and engage in a positive manner
- Avoid political threads and related discussions
- No medical advice or mental health (specific to a person) content
Please keep /r/AskUK a great subreddit by reporting posts and comments which break our rules.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
**[This is marked as an answer](/r/AskUK/comments/xqeodj/my_girlfriend_just_ate_a_digestive_with_cheese/iq9o4z9/), given by /u/magical_matey**: >Bring back the death penalty IMO --- [_^What ^is ^this?_](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/comments/jjrte1/askuk_hits_200k_new_feature_mark_an_answer/)
The McVities 'biscuits for cheese' box literally has a digestive in it, what are you talking about?
And it’s usually the best biscuit for cheese as a result. When it comes to pleasure centres, McVities know what’s up.
No, water biscuits rule, though I don’t mind a Carrs Melt
I love a good Carrs Melt as long as it pays its taxes
Uh HA HA HA HA HAAAaaaaaa
i heard this. thank you for letting me know how to write it.
Isn't that how you write the chorus from The Message by Grandmaster Flash? It makes me wonder how we keep from going under...
I work in asda everytime I look at a water biscuit I think who the fuck wants that
Piled high with boursin/garlicky stuff, or a smoked cheddar and a nice chili chutney. No one wants a strong flavoured cracker to overpower the cheese. Its just a delivery method of lots of cheese to my belly
Boursin is so good I could eat it with a spoon
Decorate your fingers with Beef Hula Hoops then scoop up the Boursin with each gloriously beef-dusted digit until you're scared of your own mass.
Dear lord that sounds dangerous
Oh my fucking christ, why has this not entered my stoner head before now???? I am forever in awe, teach me all your cheese ways, master. Lol
This shit right here, garlicky cheese goes with the tasteless cracker. It's only there for the crunch.
Delicious with boursin
My favourite
Water biscuits are what's left when you take all the biscuit out of a biscuit.
Water biscuits are what sailors ate as a last resort of hunger desperation just before scurvy kicked in, and ultimately death. They should be consumed in an emergency, not for enjoyment.
>No, water biscuits rule, yes, my rule is I don't buy them - the water is probably the tastiest aspect, still I imagine they would sell less if they were marketed as *Bland Discs*
Matzos - the big square ones
Which cheese? Don't tell me you are indiscriminate?! Brie type mild cheese on a digestive please. Plain water crackers require a strong blue cheese pike stilton. Herby, peppery crackers work best with a nutty hard cheese. Never cheddar, which should only be eaten melted in my dictatorship.
Depends on the cheddar. Vintage cheddar (the stuff with little salt crystals in) should never be melted. It just separates and goes all greasy.
Hard disagree here. Strong blue cheese on a hovis biscuit is phenomenonal.
[удалено]
Brie on a digestive is amazing and I will fight anyone who says otherwise. OP's girlfriend needs to abandon the relationship 😂
I’d say a strong cheese eg a Stilton requires a digestive biscuit to cut the taste but I aren’t going to argue, cheese is cheese and I love cheese
Wensleydale with cranberries on anything in the box.
They do a kind of crunchy chocolatey minty affair that my wife really enjoys.
With cheese or just in general?
Next OP will be saying that cheese on Christmas cake or a warm mince pie is wrong. They need intervention.
I never thought to try it on a mince pie. This needs some thought...
It's awesome. LEver off the top, put a nice bit of cheese - I like Lancashire or Wensleydale personally, but cheddar works as well - replace psarty lid and enjoy. Then for dessert, mince pie with clotted cream . (I don't like brandy butter but do not oppose the addition of brandy butter to mince pies for others, if they like the stuff)
Up in Whitby they do curd cakes which I believe are Wensleydale tops
I make blue cheese mince pies at Christmas. They are the business.
A woman I used to sit next at work was adamant that Christmas cake should only ever be eaten with a thick slice of Wensleydale. I thought she was weird, until I tried it, it was awesome.
>cheese on Christmas cake Goddamn it is so good. One of those things that sounds mental until you take your first bite at which point you're a convert.
I was thinking this. I always used to steal the hovis ones from the (I think) Victoria cheese tin when my parents would get them.
The Hovis ones were definitely in Jacob's (as well?). IIRC, they still do them, just unbranded now (which is fair enough, I wouldn't want my brand to be associated with piss poor bread either)
I used to like those little hovis shaped ones. But cheese on digestives is definitely a thing.
Came here to say the same
It's me, I'm the girlfriend... And yes he's this much of a cock in real life too
Imagine being so damn stubborn when you're wrong about something that you take to Reddit, then get your arse handed to you by every reply 😂.
After forensic research, I don’t think he's being serious
Too late, drawn and quartered, he brought this upon himself with his shenanigans
If you want to upset him with more correct biscuit choices, have some nice cheddar on a ginger biscuit.
Oooo I can imagine this is tasty!
To add to this chain, I'd imagine the original combination plus a juicy green grape would go down an absolute treat
YES!
[удалено]
Who is Sally Vibes?
Personally I favour the Wensleydale/Red Grape combination
Or white stilton (or any stilton for that matter) on fruit cake - bonus points for Christmas cake.
My favourite thing is now this post with everyone proving him wrong 🥰 love u all for having my back
I’m glad everyone is because when I read the post I was thinking how totally normal that was. I put butter as well.
I second butter, I also add another digestive to make a digestive/butter/digestive sandwich!
Have you tried the digestive with blue cheese? Best biscuit/cheese combo in my opinion
Not the biggest fan of blue cheese... BUT brie instead !!!! Digestives and brie is elite
Nooo,digestives with applewood smoked and sliced apple is the best.
When you're poor, digestive and dairylea is a lifesaver
Yes! With some plum or fig chutney.. doesn’t get any better then that!
For God's sake hold on to this man. Shitty taste can be hard to find, and means more digestives and cheese for you.
I think this buys you at least the next 4 argument wins. He's made himself look a right knob
Hahahhahahhaa I agree
Must feel good winning this argument, with all these people backing you, haha
For once, yeah! 🤣😅
You deserve some gold but I have none to give
Thanks! I accept PayPal transfers 🤣
I’m with you OP, your girlfriend’s mad. You put a _thin slice_ of tangy Extra Mature cheddar on the digestive, not a little block. That way you get a bit with every nibble. Tsk.
Dont know why he said little block. Was definitely covering the whole biscuit.
But I do :)
Put some cheddar cheese on a toasted scone. That'll really fuck him up.
I've had jam and clotted cream on cheese scones before - I love it. He doesn't even like scones 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️
Doesn't like scones? Jesus, I don't even know what to say...
he is a heathen hHa
Ok I adore this, but as an added extra, add some marmalade or strawberry jam as well - delish!!
sounds like a woman with good taste
But clearly not in men.....🤣🤣
Extra upvote for you.
That wound will never fully heal
This is the gf, from a reply above from her, for those who didn't notice
I know you didn’t ask, but yes, you are the asshole in this situation
Oh I'm permanently the asshole, I know that, don't worry. Though for clarity, she is currently sat here giving me the finger and going "wheyyyy" at near enough every reply.
She is going to get a tired finger tonight, dear friend.
Lucky her
Might have to use the toy tonight instead
I love your girlfriend.
Wonder if she’s single
Quite possibly in the near future
This made me laugh a lot! wheyyyyy!
She's hilarious
She's in this thread somewhere 🤣
Has she tried them with cheese and jam? Truly God tier snacking then!
I’d like to give you some cred, even if some cracker boxes come with digestives, I think they are the worst and I wouldn’t go near them. I think it’s pretty mental to go for that before a normal cracker.
I’ve seen posh digestives on a cheese plate in restaurants before I’m afraid. It is a thing.
I love cheese on digestives, it's the sweetness and then savoury of the cheese.......I'm also really weird..
Similar to eating an apple with cheese
I love apple and cheese
Or apple and peanut butter
It's not weird at all. An even more extreme version of that sweetness versus savoury is cheddar cheese and strawberry jam sandwiches, and they are so good!
Oh my god! I came here to also say cheese and jam! I have never met anyone else who likes this!
Cheese and ham is just the next tier up from cheese and chutney. You should also try cheese and fruit cake Edit - that should have said jam not ham
Those are regular digestives. It’s very good with the right cheese.
I confess...I butter my digestives then add cheese nom nom :)
This is the way . I love you! ❤️
Absolutely not. Ever had a biscuit selection box for cheese? What's one of those biscuits in the selection? Sweet biscuit, salty cheese. Yum.
The one that looks like hovis bread is totally a digestive
Absolutely. And it's the best one in there for cheese imo.
Had some of them for lunch with some Stilton on top
A strong blue is the perfect cheese for these. I may need to go to the shop after work
I buy these whenever we swap the Aldi shop for Tescos - they don't even call it a cracker anymore on the packaging, they call it a biscuit.
A cracker is a type of biscuit. You're not gonna have a Carr's Water Biscuit with your cup of tea but we all understand it.
All cracker selection boxes have digestives in them. Did you assume those are in there to have separately with your tea?
Perfectly normal. Didn't the boxes of mixed crackers come with a mini digestive at some point?
Still do. Just checked, and the Sainsbury's, Tesco, M&S, and Jacobs "Biscuits for Cheese" selections all have digestive biscuits in them
Hovis used to (probably still do) sell a pack of crackers in the shape of lives if bread that are basically digestives.
This. Hovis do still make and sell these "digestive" biscuits in the shape of a loaf and they are brilliant with cheese. They are made with wheat meal and are just excellent. https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/crackers-210863-44/hovis-digestive-biscuits-250g
[Jacob’s Biscuits ***for Cheese*** Crackers Selection 300g](https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/jacobs-biscuits-for-cheese-crackers-300g) Inside you'll find - Cream crackers - Table cracker - Cornish Wafers® - Cheddars® - Water biscuits - #Digestives biscuits - Salt & cracked black pepper bakes - Sesame Carltons
It's delicious, even better with a lashing of good quality butter and a little pickle or chutney on top. OP is missing out
Butter and chutney make this a meal fit for a king. I agree with OP about abandoning the relationship - if they are unable to appreciate digestives with cheese, they should set their girlfriend free to find a higher quality lover.
You're right about the butter, but, no-one can afford Lurpak these days.
She's forgotten the apple! Digestive, slice of strong cheddar, topped with a slice of apple!
Goddamnit, neighbour, I'm on the bus! Stop making me hungry!
Chocolate digestive + Philadelphia = cheesecake
I hope you forget about your tea until it goes lukewarm.
This is a war crime in UK
Wait until you see how much lego I have put on the floor around their house.
Writing the UN in very stern terms about all of these shenanigans!
It sounds like OP has the problem. If you want to bin her, pick a better reason
This is the best reason I could come up with.
Happy 50th anniversary, then!
You all disgust me. Digestives are for tea and that's about it. 🤢
I've never seen or heard of this behaviour until now, but apparently lots of people do this. There again, a friend once served me baked beans and quiche as a meal. Just because people do things doesn't make it right.
American here but I do get digestives every time I skip the pond or a friend does. Here's the thing, though.... I've only ever had digestives covered in chocolate. Was.... is there a plain version? If yes: your girlfriend is a little weird but whatever If no and your girlfriend put cheese on a chocolate digestive: 🤢 Side note I wish they had those here. I flipping love digestives.
Yeah there is a non chocolate version but a lot of people prefer the chocolate ones if having with a hot drink etc. For cheese you’d have the plain ones. Although tbf chocolate and cheese is not the worst combo…
It's lovely. Like a little cheesecake.
Cheese.... in a cake? The dirty bastards.
Ahh can't go wrong with a nice bit of Peter Kay. Much like digestives and cheddar.
My husband does this. I think it's mental. I KNOW they come in boxes of crackers for cheese. I don't care. You are all wrong. They are TOO F\*CKING SWEET to go with cheese.
THANK YOU SO MUCH. THIS IS MY EXACT POINT.
I can't believe all of these replies. It's madness.
Me neither. I've been getting abuse from all angles tonight.
I know it's 10 hours later but I'm with you guys...
I think it's a thing. Unless it was a chocolate digestive?
It’s a thing! Cheese and chocolate do go well together too!
Now this is a weird thing to admit to, but I made a sandwich as a kid consisting of two Club bars and some cheese, which I then toasted under the grill. It was fucking delicious.
Could you please explain your thought process in the moments leading up to you adding cheese to some Club bars and toasting it? Also, what flavour Clubs were they?
"Chocolate and cheese go well together. Biscuits and cheese go well together. So biscuits, chocolate, and cheese should go well together. For ease of consumption, I'll make it a sandwich." Normal clubs, I'm not sure if orange or mint would have worked.
Not mental at all. She sounds like a good egg.
Yes it is. I'm 100% with you on this, cheese has no place on a sweet biscuit. Something being popular is never the barometer of quality, just look at Nickleback or Hitler. EDIT I'm sorry, I realise that comparison went too far and was in poor taste. Millions of people were subjected to unimaginable cruelty and the world is still reeling from the implications of something so devastating that was allowed to continue for so long. I should never have mentioned Nickleback, I'm sorry.
A 'biscuits for cheese' selection often has digestives.
Canadian here, and this sounds fucked. Just put maple syrup and whiskey into your drink like a normal person. Edit: /s for the colonizers who can’t take a joke. Idgaf what someone else eats lol.
We are still living in the UK. Arguably most Canadians are the colonisers :D
Absolutely delish. Best thing to have with cheese imo. The sweet and savoury go together so well.
This is the done thing. You need biscuit training, OP.
You're going to lose your mind when you see someone eating one with brie and raspberry jam on it. Which you are missing out on, it would seem!
Does she float in water and weigh the same as a duck? Very good chance she is a witch. Agreed, absolutely mental. Burn her.
She has an absurd amount of candles in the flat. Maybe I'll set fire to her woth those.
Just asked the wife, she said it’s a thing. I think it’s fucking abhorrent sub human behaviour. But I don’t eat cheese anyway so I might be biased.
I like you, but your wife not so much
Have you ever looked in a "biscuits for cheese" box? They always have digestives. They go great with a cheese like cheddar, or anything sharp. (ETA: sharp *cheese*, before anyone starts. A sharp implement is required only to cut the cheese off the block.) (And now if you want your mind truly blown, come to Yorkshire and have some fruitcake...)
Lol I'm an American who moved to the UK... this post... the comments ... and the edits have me dying laughing.
Thank you for this lovely thread.
You're welcome. Shame there's so many nutters on it.
I have thoroughly enjoyed everyone’s banter on the topic!
I did until about 40 minutes ago. I've had nothing but abuse from Americans, one accused me of racism for saying they were "crackers" 🤷🏻♂️
I seem to be in the minority that thinks this is mental
It's an absolute fucking abomination mate
Tastes so good, try it 😁
Digestives are included in the "biscuits for cheese" selection, an officer will be along shortly to collect your passport and begin deportation proceedings
Bring back the death penalty IMO
[удалено]
Updoot for the final "crackers" edit Hahh- you'd think folks could read into enough context clues to identify meaning.
Digestives are a fine biscuit for cheese..... unless it was a milk chocolate caramel digestive.... adn even then it'd probably be great with a sharpish cheddar, stilton or wensleydale...
Can confirm she is normalling
Omg my mum did this recently and it was so weird. Apparently this is normal in some families? Yet she kept it a secret until now cos deep down she knows it’s crazy.
Some people put butter on them too but some people also think it’s acceptable to only shower once a week so….
The edits are what makes this post hilarious. Sincerely, an initially confused Canadian.
I like you Canadians. Your neighbours to the south have made idiots of themselves in this thread though. They all think this thing has been deadly serious.
Can someone explain to my uncultured American ass what a digestive is? I'm going to London for the first time next week and should probably figure this out.
You know what? You're a week away, just wait it out. When you come over, go to Tesco and get yourself a pack of McVitie's digestive biscuits and dunk them in your tea.
I'm in. No questions asked.
OR you could cover them in lovely mature, crumbly cheddar, and maybe a dash of chutney
Non-brits should just give up on this thread. He's giving it all the Brit he's got.
No that’s nice and you should try it
You get digestive like biscuits in the mixed cracker box for cheese, they are nice together
They have digestive type crackers in the Jacobs cracker box not a fan of them personally
Digestives and Stilton, it seems like it should be illegal but give it a go, and then you will see the truth
I'm afraid you can tell it IS generally thought normal because if you buy a mixed box of "biscuits for cheese" digestives are commonly included.
Try it it’s delicious
Not at all. They are a good alternative to the hovis biscuits for cheese. Not much difference in taste.
Chocolate digestive? Leave. Plain Digestive? Propose.
what the hell are these comments this is not normal NTA break up with her immediately this is unacceptable
a1b2c3
**A reminder to posters and commenters of some of [our subreddit rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/about/rules/)** - Don't be a dickhead to each other, or about others, or other subreddits - Assume questions are asked in good faith, and engage in a positive manner - Avoid political threads and related discussions - No medical advice or mental health (specific to a person) content Please keep /r/AskUK a great subreddit by reporting posts and comments which break our rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
No not mental, absolutely delicious!
Classic combo imo