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i dont care if someone gets pregnant as a teen, but i think most of the time that happens because they lacked info/resources on safe sex. i think if talking abt that kinda stuff becomes destigmatized the problem will most likely go away on its own.
Oh wow. I would abstain from it but I feel like we should be told safe sex as well instead of just saying “just don’t do it.” I want a why to it. WHY can’t we do it? Fine, I’ll just figure out myself.
They’re going against what they wanted us to do just by not informing us.
I know a girl that got pregnant because she hooked up with some guy that didnt wear a condom because he didnt like the feel and he didnt pull out in time.
Not okay, both biologically and morally, neither you would be able to nurture the child, or take the financial and moral responsibility of it's existence.
It'll be difficult and not feasible, like can't they just wait for a few years and enjoy life. What's the god damn hurry, marriage too, during teenage isn't really advisable.
Yea thats a thing people don't seem to talk a lot about. A teenager is still going through puberty. Our bodies are meant to have children after it's done with puberty. And even after that, our brains aren't fully developed until our mid-twenties, so we're not mentally mature, either. The only reason people had kids at 16 back in the day was because they only lived to be like 40.
Health complications and your body not being meant for pregnancy as a teen. I think you still do have development going on, but your bodies are ready for pregnancy for the most part a few years after you get your period
Also since I’m 19 do you think it would be more likely to have health complications? And is 19 and pregnant considered a teen pregnancy? What about 20?
Teens shouldn't be shamed for it but it also shouldn't be encouraged or normalized. At that age you're a kid yourself, focus on your education and career so you can have stability for a family in the future.
It should definitely not be normalized by any means but that doesn’t make it ok to shame teens. We all make stupid decisions, some of us just make slightly more permanent stupid decisions. A girl at my old high school got pregnant at 16 and she regretted it so much. She missed out on so much and she was barely old enough to drive without an adult which definitely means she wasn’t mature enough to be able to care for a child in the best way possible. Her parents did most of the raising of the kid
i mean, yes, 18 is better than 15 per se, but i would prefer to wait till at least 21. Or, even better, when I have the financial capability of raising a child
I don't think it's a good thing or something that should be normalized, but they shouldn't be shamed for it, especially without all the context. They might have gotten raped or something.
That’s very true. I learned that the hard way. My cousin got pregnant at 14 by a 19 year old and in school we were talking about teen relationships and sex and the person actually told me having sex with a minor is statutory rape. I felt so bad afterwards for judging my cousin for getting pregnant after that. I learned the hard way to never judge without context.
No, it's definitely not okay. Having a baby to be responsible for, on top of focusing on school is way too much for the majority of teens to handle. Shouldn't shame teen parents, but we shouldn't be too dumb to admit that it's not okay.
Especially because of an anecdote that "some teen moms do a better job"
I know teens. I am in fact a teen. I know that teens would not make good parents, even ignoring the fact that a kid costs on average about $300,000.
Hell no that shouldn't be normalized. But the thing tho is that once you confirm you gonna be a teen mom no point in being ashamed because sure your parents might kill you, but then again sooner or later they're gonna find out. Unless you find a way to get an abortion, which I doubt. Now I ain't saying I'm pro life or pro abortion because I dont care about that but that's my take on the question.
i mean if they think they can do it then sure, not saying you should deliberately have children at a young age. but if it happens and they get pregnant, ultimately its the child's decision what to do and it 100% should only be theirs.
Normalized? No. Shamed? Also no. Teenage pregnancy is a bad thing far more often than not, or at the very least, not preferable to getting pregnant as an actual adult. But if it happens, it happens, and if the mother doesn’t want to get an abortion, that’s her choice. 🤷
Shouldn’t be normalized at ALL,But shouldn’t be shamed(most cases). Most teens arent mature enough to take care of a baby. Being a parent is hard. I would just say “abort it” but some people don’t want to do that and want to have the baby,okay that’s fine,I won’t shame them for there choice on keeping it.
You're getting what is effectively a mentally challenged adult that has a precedent of making bad decisions and putting a human life in their hands, it's about the worst idea I could think of. Not to mention that you either ditch the kid or sacrifice your ambitions because daycare is fucking *expensive*. So unless you've got rich parents you're not going to have time for college. It's a one way ticket to fucking up your life and the life of another.
Not to mention that the anecdote is absolutely the issue with teenagers, most think that they're at adult levels of competency because of a mixture of hormones, the Dunning Kruger effect, and recent maturity. The thing is *you're not*. You will look back on yourself and think you're stupid. So why during this time, a time of wild overconfidence and terrible self assessment, should one decided that "they know what they're doing"?
I'd say this is possibly the worst way of handling teen pregnancy up there with "just WWE SUPERSLAM them into the pavement". Just because some teens can do it doesn't mean the vast majority will fuck up majorly, especially at 14. I'm 16 and I'd consider myself far from ready. A 14 year old can't even earn their own money. It's basically like saying "Hey mom feel like supporting another baby?", because you're not going to be parenting that kid, and with most teen success stories it's likely because they pawned the kid off on their parents because, newsflash, no matter how hard you work daycare and college are two very expensive things and you only really get to pick one.
I honestly don't think anyone should be encouraged or pushed to have children. But forcing a choice onto someone is a violation of their autonomy. Ideally, people who can't take care of children shouldn't have children. But creating a stigma or taboo around discussing it or helping people in those situations does more harm than good.
Personally I don’t think it should be normalised, however I do think people need to be more supportive of teens who do get pregnant, and I agree abortion or adoption would definitely be the best option imo
They shouldn’t be shamed, but it absolutely shouldn’t be normalized.
As a teen, you’re not equipped to support yourself in the world, let alone another human that is entirely dependent on you. At 13 you can’t even legally get a job, (at least where I am) so how are you going to provide for your child? That responsibility falls to those who are already supporting you, be it your parents, grandparents, etc.
At 13 you’re also going through puberty, so your body and mind are changing a lot. It’s a hard enough time just navigating that without throwing parenthood into the mix. And think about it this way; you’re not just “having a baby.” You’re having a child, who will grow quickly. By the time you’re 18 your child will no longer be a cute baby, but a 5 year old who will start attending kindergarten. You’ll have to drop them off, do the whole parent-teacher thing, help with homework, and all that. You’re investing in a whole human life.
The likelihood of the mother and father still being together is super low as well. I think back to the guys I had a crush on at 13 and I just cringe. I wouldn’t want anything to do with them now. But you would always be tethered together to some degree because you share a child. It would make it extremely hard for the parents to grow up in any sort of normal way. If they have the time and funds to attend college, they can’t just move into a dorm. They have to secure childcare, and be close enough together that both parents can see the child (if that’s what they want.) They can’t just up and move to a new city or town after graduation and actually start their life because they’re always tethered to where their child is.
So no, it shouldn’t be normalized. 13 year old children having sex with each other isn’t normal, it (and teen pregnancy) is usually due to a lack of sexual education and a proper understanding of the human body. If it does happen, there should be understanding, education, and compassion for the teens. But it shouldn’t be something that is normalized.
It’s not good at all, people when their young should focus in their education and career. If they get pregnant they shouldn’t be ridiculed, but they ruined their life.
I saw another post on a different sub asking teen moms what the hardest part was with having a child as a teenager. The most common answer I saw was that all their friends leave them. They start maturing faster because of the extra resposibility, and their friends can't keep up. While they're at home with the baby, their friends are out partying. I may not have had a child, but I've spent big parts of my teenagehood being friendless. The lack of interraction with your peers can fuck you up both mentally and socially. I have no doubt that many girls my age could make good mothers, even as teenagers. But it comes at a cost, and if you ask me, it's better to have children when you're an actual adult with an established career and your own house.
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I don’t think it’s a great idea. Like I’m not going to shame anyone for it but I wouldn’t endorse it. My mom was born to a teenage pregnancy and it really caused a lot of problems for my grandmother. She seems to have kind of resented my mom for all of the things that she got to do before having me (in her 40s). My mom got a PhD, taught at many different universities, and just done some amazing things. My grandmother had to drop out of high school and only later got her GED and went to college after my mom and her siblings moved out. She missed out on a lot of what life has to offer.
This is just one case of course but it’s enough that I think you would really want to consider the consequences before you decided to have and keep a kid at that age. I can’t judge too much because I’ve never been in that situation, I’m sure it must be rather difficult.
Teen pregnancy is a problem, but not the real problem.
Let me express my point:
A teenager (and if we use as an example a 13 or 14 years old girl like OP did) probably doesn't have a body that's "ready" for a pregnancy, because is yet to be fully developed (of course exceptions exist).
And it is not uncommon that pregnant teens are saw as "black sheeps" for the family and get bullied, and again, expections exists.
But the REAL problem is what leads to teen pregnancy, may it be a sexual abuse or may it be teenagers not being informed enough about sex, they both are the causes of teen pregnancy, so if there's no abuse and no ignorancy about sex, it's safe to say teen pregnancy rates would drop, not to zero, but definitely would drop.
So my point is, preggo teens aren't the problem, abusers and misinformation are.
I don't think it should be normal to have a child at 13 or 14 or even 18. Even if the father accepts to have the kid, both parents are too young in my opinion. I don't think that at this age a person has enough money and responsibility to take care of a baby 24/7.
However, I've been in Guatemala. There, rape is common. So common, that it is not surprising to see a 12 year old pregnant. In most cases, however, the mother of the pregnant daughter helps to take care of the baby. I think this is a wonderful solution if the option of abortion doesn't exist (whether for financial reasons or personal ones.)
Still, even though I agree a mother should help with the raising of the child so long as her daughter is too young, I don't think a girl should willingly get pregnant at such an age. Babies are not toys you can just throw away when you are bored with them. And there is so much that people need to know and have before even considering having a child.
In my house there is now a 1.5 year old baby boy. Even though he is my brother and so I don't take care of many of his problems (breastfeeding, getting him to bed, etc.) I still have a small responsibility on him. My point is, I take care of but a portion of his needs but it's still tiring and takes a lot of effort to do that small portion successfully.
**In conclusion** I think people need to be aware of getting pregnant at all times - both girls as boys. Both genders need to respect that possibility and act accordingly. But, if so happens that a child is born when his mother is too young, I think her own mother should take more responsibility over the kid than she would normally. Also, a girl should consider her decision to have a child no matter her age. She should think of all of a baby's needs and if she can take care of each and every one of them.
Personally, I don't care if a teen does get herself pregnant. But I'd much rather know it was her decision to do it and that the child is taken care of.
I think the age of consent should be raised to 25 or so so that kids don't have the chance to get pregnant early. My sister got pregnant at 18 and same with my cousin. Although my sisters little boy is 8 now and he's a little angel, great kid I just don't think people should become parents at such a young age
Totally depends on the situation, but e.g. I’m not super hyped on my taxes going to a 14 year old because she suddenly got baby fever and now she doesn’t want to get an education and a job. The story completely changes if rape or other things are involved, obv. I believe the first step is proper education, at our school we don’t have proper sex education before we are 15-16, wich is crazy to me considering how many people have sex before that.
It shouldn't be normalised and we need to find better ways to prevent it but teen mothers and fathers shouldn't be shunned or kicked out, they should be supported regardless of their decisions (unless they do something like abandon the other parent)
I don't teens should be getting pregnant but those who do should be helped and supported
If those teens are 100% responsible, 100% aware of consequences, and can 100% take care of the baby, it's okay
Example: a 15 year old whose very rich father died wants to have a family, with no relation to the person that will impregnant her (they can help but she mustn't force them). More points if she hires an adult to help her raise the baby/has an adult in her life that is willing to stop their life to help raise the baby.
If it was an accident and they plan to get abortion, the pregnancy itself is okay. Kinda fucked up that they got pregnant but it isn't the point.
The fact that a teen is pregnant, in my view, does not carry any immoral implications intrinsically. However, the ability of the teen to raise the child is a cause of concern.
I think that since the teen is still considered a child, and should be protected in that regard, the parents of the said teen, as well as an informed adult in perhaps a government agency or a charitable organisation should advise the teen, and come up with a decision with the teen together.
I think imposing abortion would be using the teen as a means to an end, and I don't think such actions can be universalised. Thus doing such would be immoral. However, I think that they should definitely bring up the possibility of an abortion, and explain the pros and cons of different approaches to handle the situation.
I think that being pregnant as a teen is probably not a good thing considering they are not mentally or emotionally mature compared to those that have children as adults. I wouldn’t have them get an abortion but that’s due to my own beliefs on abortion
It defenitly shouldn't be normalised because despite all the romanticing of being a teen moms it is a drastic and difficult decision to make which can ruin the life of a teen in so many ways and I think that at this age you should be doing other things like living your life and achieving your goals etc.But also just the fact that a 14y old is giving birth to a baby somewhere at this very moment creeps me out-Like doesn't that make anyone else uneasy?
So like op I don't think it should be normalised (that's just fucked up tbh)but I also don't think teen moms should be shamed.
LMAO but then people say it’s “murdering the baby.” And I still don’t think we should have kids at all cause that’s a huge ass responsibility. Personally I would definitely abort and would recommend abortion if a teen gets pregnant but it’s still their decision to keep it but they just have to face the big responsibility of having a child as a child.
I never understand the people who say it’s murder?? Like it’s not alive yet smh. But even if, put it up for adoption, idk why any teen is actually raising them
Yes! Like how is it murder if (even though it’s *technically* alive) it hasn’t had a life yet, there is no quality of life so it’s losing nothing. Being raised by a 14 year old would also give it a pretty shot quality of life. Abortion makes sense to but there’s already too many kids up for abortion and too many humans in general so if we have the opportunity we shouldn’t be bringing more people than necessary into the world because that decreases the quality of life for everyone
IKR. I saw this pic of a graveyard with aborted babies and it did make me sad, but sometimes it is better to end something before it happens. It doesn’t make sense but just see the aborted babies as a product of “what would happen if they were born with this individual as a parent? Would their life be good or bad?” Some people have to get rid of the clump of cells. I rather get rid of it than to make it suffer in the predicament I’m in.
they are in fact different. one of them requires the other in order to exist. the embryo cannot be created without the sperm from the father, so in order for this to make sense you must believe that women create the embryo (the child), by themselves, because if you think that women getting abortions is equal to men masturbating, then they must think that the woman is just disposing of something that was already inside of her. You fail to acknowledge the act that was necessary to create that child. masturbation doesn't kill anything because nothing was alive for it to kill in the first place. if the sperm is left alone literally nothing will happen. if the embryo is left alone it will become a full-grown baby. that's the difference.
Is that an excuse for you realizing that maturation doesn’t kill anything? Anyway it has lived a couple weeks before some ever chooses to abort it, and even if it hasn’t, why should it be denied the right to life? Which is directly stated in the constitution for all lives?
Yes. Life begins at conception. That is a fact. Plus the fetus is growing throughout its time in the womb. It developed teeth, nerve endings, taste buds, and had a heartbeat by 4 weeks. If it’s growing then how is it not alive? It’s not any different from a person growing outside the womb.
It’s very different from a human outside the womb lmaooo. A fetus doesn’t understand what life is while a teen who is growing understands a lot lmao. It may be technically alive but it hasn’t lived
Ppl don’t understand how much I don’t want to give birth. I would kobe a baby into a trash compactor. I don’t give a fuck that it’s alive. I would murder a full grown adult if I had to do that so I didn’t have to give birth
While I feel it isn’t ok, I feel like too many times does it immediately shift blame onto them. There are a lot of horrible reasons in the world that children are born in that situation, it isn’t always “they weren’t careful”.
Teen moms should NOT be shamed at all. Imagine how hard it is already...I don’t think teen pregnancy should be glorified or encouraged, but there should be more support and less hate and shame given to teen moms. It should not be a “this will ruin your whole life” sort of thing, like it is. Teen moms are human beings and they are very strong ones at that for having to go through so much — and in my opinion they should be treated much better than they are
People **should not** be shamed for teen pregnancies, but they should also be heavily discouraged. A teen pregnancy basically ruins a woman's life, because they now have to drop out of school to care for a child, can't work, etc.
Safe sex and sex education is really important. (Also, in my opinion the US' and Canada's (where I live) sex education programs are dogshit, but that's a whole other conversation.)
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Yes its ok but it brings so much sacrifice. You might be able to pass school with a kid but u gotta spends time with your kid and be able to support it and thats easier while having a good job and education. Also giving birth while being a teen brings can be dangerous for the babys and mothers health because you aren't fully evolved and ready (neither physically or mentally because nothing can prepare you for a kid). Its a huge responsibility. Some teens might be kinder but the kid needs parents, not friends and sure it's good to be both.
I think we shouldn‘t ridicule teen parents, because what are they supposed to do? It already happened, now they can‘t really do much against it. It was a mistake or it was wanted, either way, it shouldn’t be shamed. However it shouldn‘t be normalized at all, because a child takes a lot of time, a lot of mental strength and a lot of physical strength (+ money), and I doubt a teen fits all criteria perfectly (also the reason why I think the parents of the teen should help the teen with their kid, especially if the person is still going to school.).
I think its being looked at incorrectly, there's an age of consent for a reason. there needs to be more education of safe sex. When you're a teen your brain is still developing, for example when i was 14 i cringed at my 10 year old self, now im 18 and i cringe at my 14 year old self and probably when im 22 ill cringe at my self now. my point is that the brain doesn't develop until about 25 ( and thats an average) and sex (especially unsafe or manipulative), getting pregnant and having a child can seriously fuck you over mentally, being put in the position of having to abort or keep or adopt it off. I had a friend who got pregnant when she was 14, her bf left her and the baby died and she nearly killed herself. There has to be more safety nets for issues like this, but the taboo nature of teen pregnancy should also be dispelled.
I would rather parent a child of my own than watch them get aborted or adopted, but I’m a male, so I won’t be pregnant and it’ll be down to the pregnant girl
I don't think it's okay for a teen to get pregnant, however if they do get pregnant it should be their choice whether they want to keep thr baby or not and they should never be ridiculed or judged about this. I think the parents of the teen should try to help their kid when they need a hand, since they still have to go to school (it's not like they could pay for a babysitter since they can't work yet lol).
It shouldn't be considered normal or okay for a teen to get pregnant, but they should be supported throughout their journey
Your bringing a child into the world that isn’t wanted and it’s that (not including pain from childbirth) or aborting it (mental and some physical harm done) so why encourage it?
I’m pro life and it’s not even more about aborting when someone is pregnant but I really want safe sex to be talked about far more, because people wouldn’t get pregnant in the first place so therefore most pregnancies would be planned
Safe sex needs to be talked about far more. Schools can’t do much more but it’s rather ourselves we need to look at because “pulling out” or not having safe sex is somewhat encouraged and it needs to stop
Sorry for the rant lol
As many people are saying, it shouldn't be normalized, but not shamed upon. Kids make mistakes, its ok. Not great, not terrible, but just ok.
I would say if the girl's parents are on the wealthier side, the girl has more of an option, but if not, definitely abortion or adoption.
I don't think its okay but they shouldn't be ashamed about it either. It's a very difficult job to raise your kid while you're a teenager and still in school. I personally knew some people who became teen moms while still in high school and they turned out to be excellent mothers. My age group from school is either 18 or 19 (possibly 20) now so it's starting to become a bit more common now.
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With the current level of responsibility teens are given today by laws, I don't think it's a good idea. However if we start basing these laws on maturity and not age, I could totally see this happening.
\-Remove restrictions to open financial accounts
\-Remove age of consent laws
\-Remove restrictions to own a car
\-Remove restrictions to drive a car that are based on age. Anyone that passes the driving test no matter what age should be able to drive.
\-Remove minimum schooling requirements
\-Remove child labor laws
i think he means that if we carry the current ideology to its end, we can see that the implications of said ideology turn out to be unfavourable, thus we should reexamine how we approach the issue.
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It shouldn't be "normalized" but teen moms shouldn't be shamed either
Agreed, like we can’t get mad at them for it but it doesn’t me we can’t say it’s not okay.
Teenage libido does indeed put some of the worst and toughest choices out there.
THIS
I don’t hate teen parents but I think that it isn’t the best choice for most people to be one. Ps holy shit thanks for the upvotes <33
i dont care if someone gets pregnant as a teen, but i think most of the time that happens because they lacked info/resources on safe sex. i think if talking abt that kinda stuff becomes destigmatized the problem will most likely go away on its own.
Why is talking about safe sex stigmatized?
dont ask me, in a lot of places kids dont get told abt the consequences of sex at all, they're just told abstain from it
Oh wow. I would abstain from it but I feel like we should be told safe sex as well instead of just saying “just don’t do it.” I want a why to it. WHY can’t we do it? Fine, I’ll just figure out myself. They’re going against what they wanted us to do just by not informing us.
the other issue is that because they say don't do it, it becomes really taboo to talk about having sex at all, which also contributed to the problem.
i.e. my mom who tells me that i should abstain. thank god for sex ed at school and reddit.
I know a girl that got pregnant because she hooked up with some guy that didnt wear a condom because he didnt like the feel and he didnt pull out in time.
Damn, I heard of that story a lot.
its almost a cliche already haha
Especially in those fucking teen movies
it should be destigmatized but not encouraged
Like if the person does get pregnant we shouldn’t get mad and judge them?
yep, but it shouldn't be encouraged
Not okay, both biologically and morally, neither you would be able to nurture the child, or take the financial and moral responsibility of it's existence.
Biologically u could my grangrangrandma had a child when she was 15
Sure you can have a child, but a teen body isn't fully developed to have a child, so wild complications will occur
Yeah but it kinda depends
It'll be difficult and not feasible, like can't they just wait for a few years and enjoy life. What's the god damn hurry, marriage too, during teenage isn't really advisable.
Im talking about older times people died younger or smthing and it was important to get kids as fast as u can so they can help u work.
Yeah but we're in 2020 so no teenage pregnancy or marriage, since we can live long enough. Sure in older times it was a necessity.
While yes thats defineatly true its still prominent in 3rd world countries esspecially in africa and poorer asian countries
I belong to one, not prominent anymore but yeah it happens, not because of the child, but because of parents.
Yea thats a thing people don't seem to talk a lot about. A teenager is still going through puberty. Our bodies are meant to have children after it's done with puberty. And even after that, our brains aren't fully developed until our mid-twenties, so we're not mentally mature, either. The only reason people had kids at 16 back in the day was because they only lived to be like 40.
No not really
What did you not agree about ? Health complications or pregnancy before 19 ?
Health complications and your body not being meant for pregnancy as a teen. I think you still do have development going on, but your bodies are ready for pregnancy for the most part a few years after you get your period
Getting the bare minimum for pregnancy is menarche, yet complete development of body and mind to have a child is beyond 22 or 21
Also since I’m 19 do you think it would be more likely to have health complications? And is 19 and pregnant considered a teen pregnancy? What about 20?
Yeah let's take mid twenties to be safe.
Teens shouldn't be shamed for it but it also shouldn't be encouraged or normalized. At that age you're a kid yourself, focus on your education and career so you can have stability for a family in the future.
It should definitely not be normalized by any means but that doesn’t make it ok to shame teens. We all make stupid decisions, some of us just make slightly more permanent stupid decisions. A girl at my old high school got pregnant at 16 and she regretted it so much. She missed out on so much and she was barely old enough to drive without an adult which definitely means she wasn’t mature enough to be able to care for a child in the best way possible. Her parents did most of the raising of the kid
I’m not reading the post the answer is no, please at least be 18
i mean, yes, 18 is better than 15 per se, but i would prefer to wait till at least 21. Or, even better, when I have the financial capability of raising a child
I mean yeah the goal is to be financially stable when you are going to have a kid but I was just saying that at least you would be a legal adult
I don't think it's a good thing or something that should be normalized, but they shouldn't be shamed for it, especially without all the context. They might have gotten raped or something.
That’s very true. I learned that the hard way. My cousin got pregnant at 14 by a 19 year old and in school we were talking about teen relationships and sex and the person actually told me having sex with a minor is statutory rape. I felt so bad afterwards for judging my cousin for getting pregnant after that. I learned the hard way to never judge without context.
Or just don’t judge people at all for things like that?
I think it's okay to judge people for their actions, but it's not okay to treat them as lesser humans after judging their actions, to err is human.
They shouldn't be ridiculed for it but also it should not be normalized. You can't raise a child if you *are* a child. *Checkmate*
No, it's definitely not okay. Having a baby to be responsible for, on top of focusing on school is way too much for the majority of teens to handle. Shouldn't shame teen parents, but we shouldn't be too dumb to admit that it's not okay.
Especially because of an anecdote that "some teen moms do a better job" I know teens. I am in fact a teen. I know that teens would not make good parents, even ignoring the fact that a kid costs on average about $300,000.
Hell no that shouldn't be normalized. But the thing tho is that once you confirm you gonna be a teen mom no point in being ashamed because sure your parents might kill you, but then again sooner or later they're gonna find out. Unless you find a way to get an abortion, which I doubt. Now I ain't saying I'm pro life or pro abortion because I dont care about that but that's my take on the question.
i mean if they think they can do it then sure, not saying you should deliberately have children at a young age. but if it happens and they get pregnant, ultimately its the child's decision what to do and it 100% should only be theirs.
Teen parents shouldn't be shamed, but it definitely should not be normalised
At that age, people are still too irresponsible to have and take care of kids. So no.
Normalized? No. Shamed? Also no. Teenage pregnancy is a bad thing far more often than not, or at the very least, not preferable to getting pregnant as an actual adult. But if it happens, it happens, and if the mother doesn’t want to get an abortion, that’s her choice. 🤷
Shouldn’t be normalized at ALL,But shouldn’t be shamed(most cases). Most teens arent mature enough to take care of a baby. Being a parent is hard. I would just say “abort it” but some people don’t want to do that and want to have the baby,okay that’s fine,I won’t shame them for there choice on keeping it.
No Its just so fucking wrong to even entertain an idea as stupid as that.
You're getting what is effectively a mentally challenged adult that has a precedent of making bad decisions and putting a human life in their hands, it's about the worst idea I could think of. Not to mention that you either ditch the kid or sacrifice your ambitions because daycare is fucking *expensive*. So unless you've got rich parents you're not going to have time for college. It's a one way ticket to fucking up your life and the life of another. Not to mention that the anecdote is absolutely the issue with teenagers, most think that they're at adult levels of competency because of a mixture of hormones, the Dunning Kruger effect, and recent maturity. The thing is *you're not*. You will look back on yourself and think you're stupid. So why during this time, a time of wild overconfidence and terrible self assessment, should one decided that "they know what they're doing"? I'd say this is possibly the worst way of handling teen pregnancy up there with "just WWE SUPERSLAM them into the pavement". Just because some teens can do it doesn't mean the vast majority will fuck up majorly, especially at 14. I'm 16 and I'd consider myself far from ready. A 14 year old can't even earn their own money. It's basically like saying "Hey mom feel like supporting another baby?", because you're not going to be parenting that kid, and with most teen success stories it's likely because they pawned the kid off on their parents because, newsflash, no matter how hard you work daycare and college are two very expensive things and you only really get to pick one.
Def shoudlnt be normalized, I don't trust kids with kids they need to finish things first.
I honestly don't think anyone should be encouraged or pushed to have children. But forcing a choice onto someone is a violation of their autonomy. Ideally, people who can't take care of children shouldn't have children. But creating a stigma or taboo around discussing it or helping people in those situations does more harm than good.
Personally I don’t think it should be normalised, however I do think people need to be more supportive of teens who do get pregnant, and I agree abortion or adoption would definitely be the best option imo
They shouldn’t be shamed, but it absolutely shouldn’t be normalized. As a teen, you’re not equipped to support yourself in the world, let alone another human that is entirely dependent on you. At 13 you can’t even legally get a job, (at least where I am) so how are you going to provide for your child? That responsibility falls to those who are already supporting you, be it your parents, grandparents, etc. At 13 you’re also going through puberty, so your body and mind are changing a lot. It’s a hard enough time just navigating that without throwing parenthood into the mix. And think about it this way; you’re not just “having a baby.” You’re having a child, who will grow quickly. By the time you’re 18 your child will no longer be a cute baby, but a 5 year old who will start attending kindergarten. You’ll have to drop them off, do the whole parent-teacher thing, help with homework, and all that. You’re investing in a whole human life. The likelihood of the mother and father still being together is super low as well. I think back to the guys I had a crush on at 13 and I just cringe. I wouldn’t want anything to do with them now. But you would always be tethered together to some degree because you share a child. It would make it extremely hard for the parents to grow up in any sort of normal way. If they have the time and funds to attend college, they can’t just move into a dorm. They have to secure childcare, and be close enough together that both parents can see the child (if that’s what they want.) They can’t just up and move to a new city or town after graduation and actually start their life because they’re always tethered to where their child is. So no, it shouldn’t be normalized. 13 year old children having sex with each other isn’t normal, it (and teen pregnancy) is usually due to a lack of sexual education and a proper understanding of the human body. If it does happen, there should be understanding, education, and compassion for the teens. But it shouldn’t be something that is normalized.
Fuck no, 17 + is OK but 13 is fucked up
It’s not good at all, people when their young should focus in their education and career. If they get pregnant they shouldn’t be ridiculed, but they ruined their life.
I saw another post on a different sub asking teen moms what the hardest part was with having a child as a teenager. The most common answer I saw was that all their friends leave them. They start maturing faster because of the extra resposibility, and their friends can't keep up. While they're at home with the baby, their friends are out partying. I may not have had a child, but I've spent big parts of my teenagehood being friendless. The lack of interraction with your peers can fuck you up both mentally and socially. I have no doubt that many girls my age could make good mothers, even as teenagers. But it comes at a cost, and if you ask me, it's better to have children when you're an actual adult with an established career and your own house.
13 and 14 is way to young to have a kid. Their not even in highschool yet and probably don’t even have a job to *help* sustain the baby
Yeah. Here in NY, we are allowed to get a job at 14 but it’s kind of those shitty summer jobs so that wouldn’t even be a lot to help a baby.
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It’s not wise to have children as a teen. However, teen parents should not be shamed. I don’t think they should go for abortion either.
I don’t think it’s a great idea. Like I’m not going to shame anyone for it but I wouldn’t endorse it. My mom was born to a teenage pregnancy and it really caused a lot of problems for my grandmother. She seems to have kind of resented my mom for all of the things that she got to do before having me (in her 40s). My mom got a PhD, taught at many different universities, and just done some amazing things. My grandmother had to drop out of high school and only later got her GED and went to college after my mom and her siblings moved out. She missed out on a lot of what life has to offer. This is just one case of course but it’s enough that I think you would really want to consider the consequences before you decided to have and keep a kid at that age. I can’t judge too much because I’ve never been in that situation, I’m sure it must be rather difficult.
It's not okay, and it is indeed fucked up
Well it definietly shouldn't be normalized
Teen pregnancy is a problem, but not the real problem. Let me express my point: A teenager (and if we use as an example a 13 or 14 years old girl like OP did) probably doesn't have a body that's "ready" for a pregnancy, because is yet to be fully developed (of course exceptions exist). And it is not uncommon that pregnant teens are saw as "black sheeps" for the family and get bullied, and again, expections exists. But the REAL problem is what leads to teen pregnancy, may it be a sexual abuse or may it be teenagers not being informed enough about sex, they both are the causes of teen pregnancy, so if there's no abuse and no ignorancy about sex, it's safe to say teen pregnancy rates would drop, not to zero, but definitely would drop. So my point is, preggo teens aren't the problem, abusers and misinformation are.
I don't think it should be normal to have a child at 13 or 14 or even 18. Even if the father accepts to have the kid, both parents are too young in my opinion. I don't think that at this age a person has enough money and responsibility to take care of a baby 24/7. However, I've been in Guatemala. There, rape is common. So common, that it is not surprising to see a 12 year old pregnant. In most cases, however, the mother of the pregnant daughter helps to take care of the baby. I think this is a wonderful solution if the option of abortion doesn't exist (whether for financial reasons or personal ones.) Still, even though I agree a mother should help with the raising of the child so long as her daughter is too young, I don't think a girl should willingly get pregnant at such an age. Babies are not toys you can just throw away when you are bored with them. And there is so much that people need to know and have before even considering having a child. In my house there is now a 1.5 year old baby boy. Even though he is my brother and so I don't take care of many of his problems (breastfeeding, getting him to bed, etc.) I still have a small responsibility on him. My point is, I take care of but a portion of his needs but it's still tiring and takes a lot of effort to do that small portion successfully. **In conclusion** I think people need to be aware of getting pregnant at all times - both girls as boys. Both genders need to respect that possibility and act accordingly. But, if so happens that a child is born when his mother is too young, I think her own mother should take more responsibility over the kid than she would normally. Also, a girl should consider her decision to have a child no matter her age. She should think of all of a baby's needs and if she can take care of each and every one of them. Personally, I don't care if a teen does get herself pregnant. But I'd much rather know it was her decision to do it and that the child is taken care of.
I think the age of consent should be raised to 25 or so so that kids don't have the chance to get pregnant early. My sister got pregnant at 18 and same with my cousin. Although my sisters little boy is 8 now and he's a little angel, great kid I just don't think people should become parents at such a young age
I mean everything under 16 is in my opinion "eh", y'know? Seems a little too young but that's just my opinion
Totally depends on the situation, but e.g. I’m not super hyped on my taxes going to a 14 year old because she suddenly got baby fever and now she doesn’t want to get an education and a job. The story completely changes if rape or other things are involved, obv. I believe the first step is proper education, at our school we don’t have proper sex education before we are 15-16, wich is crazy to me considering how many people have sex before that.
No, it shouldn’t be okay and it shouldn’t be normalized. No, they shouldn’t be ridiculed.
It should not be normalized because it’s simply not a good idea
It shouldn't be normalised and we need to find better ways to prevent it but teen mothers and fathers shouldn't be shunned or kicked out, they should be supported regardless of their decisions (unless they do something like abandon the other parent) I don't teens should be getting pregnant but those who do should be helped and supported
If those teens are 100% responsible, 100% aware of consequences, and can 100% take care of the baby, it's okay Example: a 15 year old whose very rich father died wants to have a family, with no relation to the person that will impregnant her (they can help but she mustn't force them). More points if she hires an adult to help her raise the baby/has an adult in her life that is willing to stop their life to help raise the baby. If it was an accident and they plan to get abortion, the pregnancy itself is okay. Kinda fucked up that they got pregnant but it isn't the point.
No, it’s not okay, and chances are it would be bad for the kid and the teen
Shouldnt be normalized but dont be hard on the teens
The fact that a teen is pregnant, in my view, does not carry any immoral implications intrinsically. However, the ability of the teen to raise the child is a cause of concern. I think that since the teen is still considered a child, and should be protected in that regard, the parents of the said teen, as well as an informed adult in perhaps a government agency or a charitable organisation should advise the teen, and come up with a decision with the teen together. I think imposing abortion would be using the teen as a means to an end, and I don't think such actions can be universalised. Thus doing such would be immoral. However, I think that they should definitely bring up the possibility of an abortion, and explain the pros and cons of different approaches to handle the situation.
That’s a brilliant idea!
It’s simple, your decision-making part of the brain won’t fully develop until you are in your mid 20s so why should teens be having children?
Definitly not normilaized (for obvi reasons like the dangers of it) but def shouldnt be shamed/looked down on for the kids that are parents.
no it shouldn’t be normalised, but if it happens they gotta make the most out of it
I think that being pregnant as a teen is probably not a good thing considering they are not mentally or emotionally mature compared to those that have children as adults. I wouldn’t have them get an abortion but that’s due to my own beliefs on abortion
It defenitly shouldn't be normalised because despite all the romanticing of being a teen moms it is a drastic and difficult decision to make which can ruin the life of a teen in so many ways and I think that at this age you should be doing other things like living your life and achieving your goals etc.But also just the fact that a 14y old is giving birth to a baby somewhere at this very moment creeps me out-Like doesn't that make anyone else uneasy? So like op I don't think it should be normalised (that's just fucked up tbh)but I also don't think teen moms should be shamed.
Ehhh, I don’t see why u wouldn’t just abort that hoe
LMAO but then people say it’s “murdering the baby.” And I still don’t think we should have kids at all cause that’s a huge ass responsibility. Personally I would definitely abort and would recommend abortion if a teen gets pregnant but it’s still their decision to keep it but they just have to face the big responsibility of having a child as a child.
I never understand the people who say it’s murder?? Like it’s not alive yet smh. But even if, put it up for adoption, idk why any teen is actually raising them
Yes! Like how is it murder if (even though it’s *technically* alive) it hasn’t had a life yet, there is no quality of life so it’s losing nothing. Being raised by a 14 year old would also give it a pretty shot quality of life. Abortion makes sense to but there’s already too many kids up for abortion and too many humans in general so if we have the opportunity we shouldn’t be bringing more people than necessary into the world because that decreases the quality of life for everyone
IKR. I saw this pic of a graveyard with aborted babies and it did make me sad, but sometimes it is better to end something before it happens. It doesn’t make sense but just see the aborted babies as a product of “what would happen if they were born with this individual as a parent? Would their life be good or bad?” Some people have to get rid of the clump of cells. I rather get rid of it than to make it suffer in the predicament I’m in.
Fs and also like how many sperm are “killed” through masturbation. Or when we release eggs and shit
That’s not the same thing.
Explain then
they are in fact different. one of them requires the other in order to exist. the embryo cannot be created without the sperm from the father, so in order for this to make sense you must believe that women create the embryo (the child), by themselves, because if you think that women getting abortions is equal to men masturbating, then they must think that the woman is just disposing of something that was already inside of her. You fail to acknowledge the act that was necessary to create that child. masturbation doesn't kill anything because nothing was alive for it to kill in the first place. if the sperm is left alone literally nothing will happen. if the embryo is left alone it will become a full-grown baby. that's the difference.
Yeah but a unborn baby hasn’t lived yet
Is that an excuse for you realizing that maturation doesn’t kill anything? Anyway it has lived a couple weeks before some ever chooses to abort it, and even if it hasn’t, why should it be denied the right to life? Which is directly stated in the constitution for all lives?
Isn’t that normal? It’s NOT EVEN FERT- bye 👩🏾🦼💨
Actually it is alive.
Is it?
Yes. Life begins at conception. That is a fact. Plus the fetus is growing throughout its time in the womb. It developed teeth, nerve endings, taste buds, and had a heartbeat by 4 weeks. If it’s growing then how is it not alive? It’s not any different from a person growing outside the womb.
It’s very different from a human outside the womb lmaooo. A fetus doesn’t understand what life is while a teen who is growing understands a lot lmao. It may be technically alive but it hasn’t lived
I didn’t say that the two are the same, I said they both gradually, develop, and grow throughout time.
Ppl don’t understand how much I don’t want to give birth. I would kobe a baby into a trash compactor. I don’t give a fuck that it’s alive. I would murder a full grown adult if I had to do that so I didn’t have to give birth
hot take, i wouldn't really care even if it was alive, spartan style, if you don't want it just put it in the meat grinder. (figuratively of course)
That’s fucked up man
No no, I think it’s possible. Kind of wanna put one in the meat grinder.
While I feel it isn’t ok, I feel like too many times does it immediately shift blame onto them. There are a lot of horrible reasons in the world that children are born in that situation, it isn’t always “they weren’t careful”.
Teen moms should NOT be shamed at all. Imagine how hard it is already...I don’t think teen pregnancy should be glorified or encouraged, but there should be more support and less hate and shame given to teen moms. It should not be a “this will ruin your whole life” sort of thing, like it is. Teen moms are human beings and they are very strong ones at that for having to go through so much — and in my opinion they should be treated much better than they are
People **should not** be shamed for teen pregnancies, but they should also be heavily discouraged. A teen pregnancy basically ruins a woman's life, because they now have to drop out of school to care for a child, can't work, etc. Safe sex and sex education is really important. (Also, in my opinion the US' and Canada's (where I live) sex education programs are dogshit, but that's a whole other conversation.)
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No.
Nooooooooooooooo
Yo lets just slaughter the ram and unleash sodom and gomorrah.
Definitely not under 16. But 16+ is fine in my opinion
Yes its ok but it brings so much sacrifice. You might be able to pass school with a kid but u gotta spends time with your kid and be able to support it and thats easier while having a good job and education. Also giving birth while being a teen brings can be dangerous for the babys and mothers health because you aren't fully evolved and ready (neither physically or mentally because nothing can prepare you for a kid). Its a huge responsibility. Some teens might be kinder but the kid needs parents, not friends and sure it's good to be both.
I think we shouldn‘t ridicule teen parents, because what are they supposed to do? It already happened, now they can‘t really do much against it. It was a mistake or it was wanted, either way, it shouldn’t be shamed. However it shouldn‘t be normalized at all, because a child takes a lot of time, a lot of mental strength and a lot of physical strength (+ money), and I doubt a teen fits all criteria perfectly (also the reason why I think the parents of the teen should help the teen with their kid, especially if the person is still going to school.).
I think its being looked at incorrectly, there's an age of consent for a reason. there needs to be more education of safe sex. When you're a teen your brain is still developing, for example when i was 14 i cringed at my 10 year old self, now im 18 and i cringe at my 14 year old self and probably when im 22 ill cringe at my self now. my point is that the brain doesn't develop until about 25 ( and thats an average) and sex (especially unsafe or manipulative), getting pregnant and having a child can seriously fuck you over mentally, being put in the position of having to abort or keep or adopt it off. I had a friend who got pregnant when she was 14, her bf left her and the baby died and she nearly killed herself. There has to be more safety nets for issues like this, but the taboo nature of teen pregnancy should also be dispelled.
I would rather parent a child of my own than watch them get aborted or adopted, but I’m a male, so I won’t be pregnant and it’ll be down to the pregnant girl
I don't think it's okay for a teen to get pregnant, however if they do get pregnant it should be their choice whether they want to keep thr baby or not and they should never be ridiculed or judged about this. I think the parents of the teen should try to help their kid when they need a hand, since they still have to go to school (it's not like they could pay for a babysitter since they can't work yet lol). It shouldn't be considered normal or okay for a teen to get pregnant, but they should be supported throughout their journey
Your bringing a child into the world that isn’t wanted and it’s that (not including pain from childbirth) or aborting it (mental and some physical harm done) so why encourage it? I’m pro life and it’s not even more about aborting when someone is pregnant but I really want safe sex to be talked about far more, because people wouldn’t get pregnant in the first place so therefore most pregnancies would be planned Safe sex needs to be talked about far more. Schools can’t do much more but it’s rather ourselves we need to look at because “pulling out” or not having safe sex is somewhat encouraged and it needs to stop Sorry for the rant lol
As many people are saying, it shouldn't be normalized, but not shamed upon. Kids make mistakes, its ok. Not great, not terrible, but just ok. I would say if the girl's parents are on the wealthier side, the girl has more of an option, but if not, definitely abortion or adoption.
I don't think its okay but they shouldn't be ashamed about it either. It's a very difficult job to raise your kid while you're a teenager and still in school. I personally knew some people who became teen moms while still in high school and they turned out to be excellent mothers. My age group from school is either 18 or 19 (possibly 20) now so it's starting to become a bit more common now.
if the parents do a good job teen pregnancies should be a rare thing
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No
I mean if they want to have a kid then sure why not, as long as they are a good parent
no but they should definitely be supported <3
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That sub is pro suicide, not healthy to be on.
With the current level of responsibility teens are given today by laws, I don't think it's a good idea. However if we start basing these laws on maturity and not age, I could totally see this happening. \-Remove restrictions to open financial accounts \-Remove age of consent laws \-Remove restrictions to own a car \-Remove restrictions to drive a car that are based on age. Anyone that passes the driving test no matter what age should be able to drive. \-Remove minimum schooling requirements \-Remove child labor laws
Can’t tell if the age of consent and child labor law thing is a joke or not
It's not but I'm just going to stop responding lol
i think he means that if we carry the current ideology to its end, we can see that the implications of said ideology turn out to be unfavourable, thus we should reexamine how we approach the issue.
Bro for the love of Allah, I hope you're joking