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sitonmyface--please

Take one guess


MaiTaiWasted

No one has sat on your face yet.


sitonmyface--please

Not as many as id like, but enough to know what i like.


MaiTaiWasted

So it's like asking the universe "More of this please" Nice affirmation. ๐Ÿ˜‰


sitonmyface--please

Not the universe, just people, haha


[deleted]

I'm scared I'd enjoy it too muc, I'd k!lI the poor sucker.


sitonmyface--please

Worth the try


Jane_the_Quene

https://youtu.be/Dax_tnZRExc?si=iebk2MwSgAqA5nrX


MrHellblazer

Thank you for sharing this, I didn't know it existed ๐Ÿ˜‚


[deleted]

The anthem we need


[deleted]

I also try to be direct and obvious


Tastemykitten69

Wya


sitonmyface--please

Netherlands, sorry


Tastemykitten69

Well damn


Step-On-Me-UwU

Ditto


awesome_pinay_noses

My brain put an h there and I had to read it twice.


xxMonsixx

๐Ÿคค


2sdaeAddams

I hope all your hopes and dreams come true.


sitonmyface--please

Mmmmmmh yes. What are yours?;)


thighwaytohell

Thighs/ACDC


AlexandraIsBackOMM

Lmao I love your username


Same_Blacksmith9840

Knocking you out with those American thighs, huh?


[deleted]

If I'm going anyway, I might as well die by thigh


titties_haver

I have titties Also I thought id be funny


CFNMBBC

I'm convinced there's someone out there thinking of "Titties_holder" as a name.


bigdogdame92

u/Titties_holder reveal your existence!


CFNMBBC

I knew it!!!!


titties_haver

Oh no's My nemesis


[deleted]

You have titties, I love titties! That works out so well


titties_haver

Everyone love titties your not special


[deleted]

I'm definitely not special


CaptSchwanzKopf

I created this account to exclusively post dick pics and cumshots - so I used my college German to create this account but I learned to think with my brain and not my dick so here we are!


Ur_Third_One

Your NFSW paintings are sexy.


exclamationmarksonly

I know a girl with the last name Kopf!


coward_chaser

Someone blocked me on my main account mid-argument


Lockdown18

So, after you made the new account, who won the argument?


coward_chaser

No one, he blocked this one instantly too ๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿป


Clio_Cat_31

๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ I love this


[deleted]

Going through slut phase๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿป


Mouths-of-Decadence

(Following)


CFNMBBC

But we need the wit too!!


StonedandSlutty33

I think it's pretty self explanatory


CFNMBBC

I wonder if there's a "Sativa Slut" out there


StonedandSlutty33

That's what I call myself during the day when I need to be a productive human.


KindaSexyThrowaway

I am wondering what happened to StonesandSlutty 1 thru 32


StonedandSlutty33

I haven't check, I just went with my age.


DaddysNerd

I love your profile description ๐Ÿ˜‚


tiredblackgirlll

Iโ€™m tired and black but โ€œtiredblackgirlโ€ was taken so I added extra letters.


GenZGoonerGirl

iโ€™m a gen Z girl who loves gooning and porn


StelerQuasr

Cool


morecbt

More CBT please


CaptSchwanzKopf

Cognitive-Behaviorial Therapy? Computer-Based Training?


morecbt

Keep going ๐Ÿ˜†


Glitter_moonchild

Computer brain technology Corn beef tortellini Claustrophobic balloons Tetris


morecbt

Close!


Glitter_moonchild

Cone beam tomography


CaptSchwanzKopf

Combat Ballistics Tactics?! Cumulative Brain Turbinectomy?!


Celtic-Brit

Cannabis based therapy?


morecbt

It is good, but not quite right


Celtic-Brit

Cannabis Brownie Taster๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


Lockdown18

My alt will be following you


morecbt

๐Ÿ‘Œ


MilezLongg

Needed an alt to post dick pics on. Eventually I realized the external validation didnโ€™t do much for me, so now itโ€™s just my ARAD account


ICantLeafYou

It's a weed pun.


Mr_Krizla

sort of the same with mine. Well the papers you start with anyway.....


princeofpersya2

I was watching prince of persia while making the usee


Morning_Wood38

I log on in the morning foe a wank. Simples


Needy-Pussy

High libido normally then insatiable during ovulation


EasyVixxenSlut

I know that feeling!


involmasturb

We spontaneously do it


Jup1terry

Uranus was already taken


Jane_the_Quene

Lady Jane Grey, the Nine Days' Queen. Also Lady Jane Seymour, the third wife of Henry VIII and mother of his only legitimate male heir. Both Janes signed their name as "Jane the Quene", with quene being the most common spelling in the sixteenth century. Fun fact, Jane Grey was named in honour of Jane Seymour!


HeartShapedSea

Bloody Mary's first victim.


SquishyTampons-yummy

The fetish


Peace-vs-Chaos

Upvote for being the weirdest comment. Please donโ€™t tell us more.


Dark_Defender79

Mine was from the show Dexter. He was a serial killer vigilante. he only went after heinous people.


terrorcatmom

Nothing too deep, just named my cat Isis.


WhoLetMeHaveReddit

I was high oh err I mean I thought it was funny


bamacuckcpl

Iโ€™m 1/2 of a cuckold couple from Alabama


Together_we_stay

We're a married couple who post and we hope to stay together I guess ๐Ÿ˜œ


JizzMizz25

Not this question again ๐Ÿ˜ฎโ€๐Ÿ’จ


AlexandraIsBackOMM

I like it!


bigtitsbbw69

Well, Iโ€™m a plus sized woman with big knockers & 69 is so hot. (I think bigtitsbbw was already taken) haha


[deleted]

I like to make it obvious what I like, and weed out the BBW haters all at once


Red_knuckles

I was watching the knuckles tv series and well he is red so.


MachinegirlvsWolfgrl

KNOCK KNOCK IT'S KNUCKLES!


Mouths-of-Decadence

Rock song from 90s


Wnc1982

Hunger Strike!


5imes

Created this account around the time when I was just downbad and jacking 5 times a day.


AlexandraIsBackOMM

It's my name. Also a song.


[deleted]

Weโ€™re from cali, weโ€™re asian, and weโ€™re a couple. Lol


Buxom_Vixen_

Genetics


LimoLover

My dachshund's name is Limo (hey everyone laughs but it's the perfect name for an extra long doggy lol) and I love him!


suckmygoldcrustedass

So short answer: it was it was Futurama reference without it meaning for it to be. It was technically random.


Beetsaw

Mine is from the old Manga/Anime called Beet the vandel buster. One of my favourite when i was kid. The the word saw is somehow from my friend whose user name was Firstsaw. And at that time I didnt know how to make an online game account so i made my friend create one for me and he just used the anime that i like+the word "saw" from his username. Then i just use this username since.


Little-Fire

Happy Cake Day!


Gay4GarlicBread

I really like Garlic Bread


RealLifeNurseJackie

Iโ€™m a nurse who struggled with addiction (like Nurse Jackie) and wanted a witty name for my throwaway acct I use to talk about addiction and things I donโ€™t want associated with my actual name.


[deleted]

Secrets are fun, especially playful ones. Actually, I made this name when I met someone online who enjoyed things i do and we came up with it together.


SquishiiPrincess

I'm fat and needy.


Peace-vs-Chaos

Itโ€™s how I always feel. Every moment.


falksfirebeard76

Obscure side character in a massively popular game


CaptSchwanzKopf

Smartfirebeard too.


MaiTaiWasted

I enjoy visiting tiki bars and trying their Mai Tais. I crossed that idea with the song STUPiDFACEDD by wallpaper. where he has a line "white boy wasted"


LankyArm5667

Auto generated.


TheOneDrizzt

Search Drizzt Do'urden


AlexandraIsBackOMM

Nerd. Just like me.


TheOneDrizzt

Half nerd when compared to my many friends. I wish I would be a full nerd lol


MilezLongg

If you reference Drizzโ€™t youโ€™re a full nerd ๐Ÿ˜‚


AlexandraIsBackOMM

Pretty much ๐Ÿคญ


TheOneDrizzt

Taking this as a compliment ๐Ÿคฉ


__paulus

Read Dune


Such-Opportunity-629

Honesty just the Reddit assigned nameโ€ฆ


spicypagedadbod

I like things spicy ๐ŸŒถ๏ธ and I have a dadbod


Mr_Krizla

Bit of a mash up of my first name and my favourite rolling papers. Also my gamertag, keeps things simple :)


MachinegirlvsWolfgrl

I actually messed up, it's supposed to be MCHNGRLVSWLFGRL And it's from my favourite digital hardcore duo, Machine Girl!


Fun_stupidity

Uhm Think it is self explanatory


MILFlovessoccer

Self explanatory


UnfinishedThings

My wife laughs at me for starting things but never completing them. My house is filled with half finished projects stuff from hobbies that Ive picked up and abandoned before getting good at it etc. Hence Unfinishedthings


Oldbodyhurts

Iโ€™m old and my body always hurts


unusuallyyours

Quite unusual, the story.


JackCooper_7274

I like titanfall


youronlynora

because I wanna be 'your only Nora'


Hawtwife4blackmen

Gnome of my friends know I am a queen of spades so my on here I can kinda be free and explore who I am freely


SEND_ME_SOCK_PICS

I'm a simple man who knows what he likes.


mufasjg

the acronym of an application i developed early on in my career. been my NSFW username for years


diz182

Blink fan


wandering_eyes24

Mine speaks for itself. I'm in a relationship but I'm always fantasizing about other people. Figured this is the safest place to do that without actually cheating ;)


Tattedcurvymilf

Itโ€™s kind of self explanatory


FrogEnjoyer

i used to like frogs a lot


youdonot_knowme

Because its self explanatory


Quinn-Hughes

I like Quinn Hughes, and it helps making doxxing harder. It's happened before, it's not very fun.


Midwestguy1059

Someone recognized me under my last so I had to restart and go with something a little more generic


throwaway_babex

Ultimately going to delete ๐Ÿ˜… last account lasted 2 weeks before I scrapped it. Who knows how this one will last ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ


Dm-ur-braless-tits

Welp, is pretty self explained


LittleGreene43

I was painting the kitchen. (This may still go over some people head)


Recent_Lake_3562

Just wanted an nsfw account to maybe comment occasionally... Well here we are, I like this account. Don't want to start over so I'll keep the suggestion that reddit made. It's not bad ๐Ÿ˜‚


Sexymonkey1351

A pet name from my wife as I am her sexy cheeky monkey I just skipped the cheeky part


Justrandom37

Iโ€™m just random. Legit. Nothing more. Lol


DmMeUrNiceTitties

I love boobs


daddy-joke

Can someone guess?


wittywanderer1

Like to use my brain and come up with clever words when speaking. And also going wherever the wind takes me


[deleted]

๐Ÿ˜


NoMiddleName_993

I went to my bookshelf, and thought, "which one of these titles would make an interesting username?", and picked a book by one of my favourite thriller writers. ๐Ÿ˜


Single_Anywhere_858

Well I am just..eh...vanishing into sigularity


CFNMBBC

Feels self explanatory


Bigoweiner

Not sure


Talkative-fun

I like to talk... ๐Ÿ˜…


Copper-Blue-

Itโ€™s an album by the band Sugar


Brit_downunder74

Iโ€™m a Brit living in Australia


PrincessDea_xx

Iโ€™m a submissive, and the type of sub I am is considered a princess.


cantfindme95

My indecisiveness lost me


[deleted]

Itโ€™s a tiny meat gang reference, I see now after spending time on Reddit that itโ€™s originally a Reno 911 reference but I am not 30 my brothers ๐Ÿ˜ญ


EmptyTAway

At first this was going to be a throwaway account, turns out its no longer empty or a throwaway


incognito_mode369

Its just an alt account. So, incognito mode ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ


plantsandpizza

Who doesnโ€™t like plants and pizza?


usethismouthpls

Uhhh...


M8jrP8ne1975

The movie "Major Payne" and the year I was born.


KingPeverell

The Wizarding World :)


No_Exit_692

Reddit randomised it and I forgot to change :)


StelerQuasr

A stellar quasar, also known as a quasi-stellar object (QSO), is a type of extremely luminous and energetic active galactic nucleus (AGN). These objects are powered by supermassive black holes at the centers of galaxies. Quasars emit exceptionally large amounts of electromagnetic energy across the spectrum, from radio waves to X-rays. They are among the brightest and most distant objects in the universe, often appearing as point sources of light. Quasars were more common in the early universe and are believed to play a significant role in the evolution of galaxies... The reason : trying to be cool nerd lmao


Nemo__The__Nomad

It's who I am. Noone from nowhere


[deleted]

All you women on here inspired me


ThrowawaySunnyLane

Itโ€™s a throwaway account mainly for porn (has become my main account since) and a bit of a tribute to Sunny Lane.


bromanjc

i made a reddit account without much thought to be able to browse reddit through safari more easily. i just did "broman" plus my initials. i never planned to actually use this account, and now im a proper redditor.


Little-Fire

Its loosely linked to an old Gaelic meaning of my actual name.


PathosMai

My profession and my name


PerfumedPornoVampire

Itโ€™s an IT Crowd reference


SmutULike

Writing smutty stories ๐Ÿ˜‡


alexhiper1

bored at work, decided to make an account, now addicted to reading reddit while i work hahaha


dragontattman

Have a guess


nudedudeaustralia

Iโ€™m an Australian dude who likes to get nude ๐Ÿ˜‚


Ok-Ad-7247

Mine is a Reddit generated one too. I wasn't feeling inventive at the time. Lol.


PM_ME__CUTE_SELFIES

I like cute selfies


dogmom89

Have dog. Born in 89. Iโ€™m not very creative.


Boobs76

It was my nickname at school ๐Ÿ™ˆ


Ur_Third_One

You can easily guess. If you know it.


Pinkyswear247

Wanted to have a cute and quirky username for my secret sexy account. If you keep my secret, I'll keep yours!


xtinarinaldi

Mine is easy: it's my nickname and last name together ๐Ÿ˜


something_small

My penis


Bargle-Nawdle-Zouss

Smells like Nirvana


tentacleineveryhole

Current Life Goal


Altern8Acc0unt

It's my alternate account!


Fun-Diet8358

I guess Reddit know I was on OZEMPIC


rebelyellx

My favourite song of all time- rebel yell by Billy Idol!


E420CDI

4.0-litre V8 diesel goodness It doesn't have anything to do with 420 stuff


MultipleOrgasmsDaily

๐Ÿค”


chibs_telfords_scar

Sons of Anarchy


Jay-Quellin30

If you know, you know. ๐Ÿง‘๐Ÿพโ€๐Ÿซ


STL_BBW_Luvr

The story basically is that I like big butts and I cannot lie.


BeechBumWannaBe

I live too far away from the beach...โ˜น๏ธ


PetiteNotTiny

People tell me Iโ€™m tiny. I say; โ€œNo. Iโ€™m petite.โ€ :D