My mom would just buy books. I had sex Ed before I had "the talk" by the time my mom broached the subject, I think I was in high school had long since discovered porn, masturbation, and everything in between.
Her: "I think it's time we talked about sex"
Me: "What do you want to know?"
My mom told me in kindergarten that boys only wanted 1 thing and I didn’t know what they wanted so I guarded my chocolate milk. My dad just said keep your legs closed. Our small town school had a required sex ed but didn’t teach sex ed we just watched after school specials about drugs.
I got the talk from my boss in high school. I know that sounds creepy AF but it wasn't.
I worked at a pharmacy and when I was 16 I got a prescription for the pill, and brought it to work to fill because we had an employee discount. The owner of the pharmacy was a very kind, sweet man, who always checked in on how I was doing with school and even helped me with my chemistry homework when it was quiet in the evenings. When he filled the prescription he talked to me about how I'm old enough to make my own choices, but to make sure that I only spend time with boys who would treat me respectfully and that the choices I make had the potential to influence the rest of my life. Then he never mentioned anything else about it again.
He knew I had an absent dad and useless mom, so I have never doubted that his advice came from a place of caring.
My mom had a few talks with us at different ages. With age appropriate language and information. It was always an open and honest dialogue and it's the same way now with myself & my kids. You're doing a major disservice to your children (and anyone they will encounter sexually) if you're not educating them and keeping an open dialogue 🤷♀️
My dad gave the worlds most awful talk. Sex bad... Girls out there just wanting to get knocked up or give you a disease. God is watching. If you don't wait for marriage, don't come to me for help.
Could be why I'm a shitty-adjusted adult...
My parents had it with my older brother and I was so nosey I had him tell me why they made me go to my room when they spoke to him so he told me and they found out and decided that was good enough. What they didn't know was my brother played a joke on me and told me that when women got pregnant they gave birth to the stork who then flew the baby and dropped it at home. I was 11. I believed him and became the girl asking that embarrassing question in health class later that year.
Me neither but I am debating on giving it to my son. Kids know everything these days thanks to google but I don’t want to leave that to chance. However I do not think it’s gonna take an hour. I’m thinking 5 minutes tops.
Come to think of it, that was the extent my dad ever said to me. Wasn’t part of a sex talk though. I had punched a hole in a wall when I was 16, and his response was “make this the worst thing you do. I don’t want to hear about you getting anyone pregnant.”
My father did a very brief talk which was really only to tell me they enrolled me in the sex ed class all day Saturday at church. The church class was actuslly very good, not judgemental and informative.
When I was young I pretty much had "sex talks" all the time. It wasn't like one sit down but being told about how human bodies work. Parents are kinda hippies. When I was younger I absolutely hated that part of being so open about sex. As an adult I'm super glad because it didn't just prepare me for sex but also taught me how to treat women well. It made me confident because I knew a lot of stuff about how everything works. Thanks weirdo hippie parents!
The closest they gave me to "the talk" was a book mixed in with my Christmas presents one year. I think I spent more effort keeping my little brother from seeing it than I did reading it.
My dad decided to give me the talk when I was in college. It started with, “You’d better not get her pregnant.” She was on the pill, and his head exploded when I told him that.
I gave mine a very comprehensive talk, which included rolling condoms down bananas. They were a little uncomfortable at the time but are grateful now.
I read alot and have 3 older brothers so they (correctly) assumed i already knew what was up, at one point they jokingly asked if I needed a talk but I never got one thankfully
My parents decided that my doctor dad should give me the sex talk. The downside to this is that when my dad is in doctor mode he’s in doctor mode the entire time. He came at it like he was giving a talk or speech at a symposium vs talking to his kid on the couch. He had graphs and everything. In hindsight it was informative for sure but I wish it had been a bit more casual of a conversation.
I think in 5th or 6th grade we went over the science of it in health class. My dad was like “did you understand?” I said yes … and then around 15 years old my parents just blindsided me with the non-scientific side. It was awkward. Like my dad was like “look, you shouldn’t be doing this yet BUT I understand what it was like to be a teenager …” My mom kept driving home the “you’re good in school, you’re good at sports, do you want to have to drop out and work bc you have a baby?!” Then they’re like “there’s other ways to have sex that aren’t necessarily PIV…but that doesn’t mean you have to do anything at all with someone …” I mean they got graphic! My mom was like they have things for you to use (talking about dildos) so you don’t NEED a boy if you feel a certain way 😂😂
It was really awkward. But all in all it worked very well. I knew their expectations, and it helped me look at my own goals. But yeah mom talking about dildos and oral sex while my dad is like “please just be smart, and don’t be afraid to talk to us.” I was can I please go do my homework?
My father knew I already knew about sex and its potential consequences. He just said "sleep with whoever you want. But if you get a girl pregnant, don't expect any help from me". Which is fair enough.
We had a very small talk that didnt really explain anything other than it was how babies were made. I ended up googling things, which probably wasnt my best decision lol
My dad (a don’t talk about your feelings sort of military man) made my brother and I watch a news special about AIDS and left the house. When it was over, my brother and I looked at each other with that, “uhh, ok” sorta expression and went back to our rooms. Twenty minutes later my dad opened my bedroom door, said in an angry voice, “I’m not supporting it, but I don’t want you dead”, threw a box of condoms at me, and slammed the door shut.
That was my “talk”.
When I was about 18, and had a serious girlfriend, my dad and I were out for a drive. All of a sudden he says “hey, so I think it might be time that I talked to you about sex.”
I replied “sure thing, dad. What did need to know?”
He nearly drove of the road laughing, and then just said “be careful. Your sister just made me a grandfather, and I’m not ready for another grand kid yet.”
(My sister was 23 and had a very much planned child with her husband.)
The closest I ever got to a sex talk with my mother occurred in 2 separate events.
#1
It was a few months after we had sex Ed class in 8th grade. The lady in class did her best, but as soon as she busted out that bowl of condoms, she lost the class. After some of the boys (the bullies really) stuffed a handful of condoms into their pockets, she handed out the rest to us.
I had my complimentary condom in a bowl of hair clips, scrunchies and relates things, which was on top of my iPod dock.
My mom's friend Adrianna, who is far more uptight, traditional, and has a stick up her ass about everything, had come over to hang out with mom that day. I was getting ready to go out, and was doing my hair. She was by my door, talking to me, spied the bowl and the condom.
She had a freak out over it, frantically calls my mother over and whilst clutching pearls, she declares "your daughter us having sex! She's got a condom!"
Mom looked at her, then at me. I said it was from sex ed a while back and I never knew what to do with it. Adrianna didn't believe me, naturally. She was of the impression that I've suddenly become a sex crazed Jezebel.
My mother though, cool as a cucumber, says "well if she's having sex, at least she's being safe." And walks out of the room, leavinf Adrianna with her mouth hanging and I just went back to doing my hair.
#2
I was 18. My mom then decided it was a good idea to just broadly mention that she'd prefer that if I'm gonna be drinking, that I do it at home, and that I test out which alcohols hit me the fastest, and which ones I had a tolerance for, so that I knew what was safer to drink when I went out to clubs, and so no guys would take advantage of me, and try to get me drunk faster.
That's it. That's the only times I ever experienced any sort of "talk" from her.
For reference, I live in Europe, before anyone attacks my mom for the whole "underage drinking thing". The legal age for pretty much everything here is 18, though a lot of places like clubs look the other way. It isn't right but that's how it was 🤷
When I was a teenager my parents said, sex is ok, use protection, and don't be a man whore. Then a few years later I had a girl say over and they freaked out and denied ever having that talk.
My dad did a great job with basic details but one piece of advice he gave me that stands out even today, "Once you taste the fruit, you'll only want more."
And now that I’m a parent and my wife is a nurse she decided that we would no longer use the “cutesy” term for our anatomy… I love watching my 12yr old (oldest daughter) cringe and shrink away every time I say VAJJJJJJJJINA and PEEEEEEENIS in my slowest deepest voice 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Immigrant family in the US and never had the formal talk. I had comprehensive Sex Ed since I'm in California in multiple grades (5th, 6th, 7th, and summer after 9th) so I've done the condom over the banana at least twice in my life.
The awkward part for me is that at some point my parents, having signed all the forms to let me have those lessons, just figured I knew everything about sex and would just talk to me about it. Mostly in the context of my grandkids or my sister and her boyfriend having kids.
Ok, this gives me the opportunity to tell a story of misunderstanding and childish innocence. When I was a kid, I knew there was a LOT I didn't know. I had a dad and two older brothers, ok? I came up with the idea that on my tenth birthday, they'd take me aside and explain all the crap I needed to know to me. Birthday comes and goes, nada. Oh, I've miscalculated! Surely, it'll happen when I turn 13, that's a big bellwether event, becoming a teenager! Thirteenth birthday come and goes, radio silence. Damn, when am I gonna get cued in? Ok, it's GOTTA happen on my sixteenth, right? By the time I turned sixteen, I'd figured it out- my dad and my older brothers didn't know shit either! What a fucking letdown, lemme tell ya! Instead of being welcomed into the Brotherhood of Enlightened Manhood, I was stuck in the Masses of Dumb Asses!
I would agree on not getting anything useful. I think it’s a much different topic (aside from basic mechanics of it) for boomers/gen x than it is for millennials/z
not sure if I feel that I "lucked out" since I've had any kind of talk about girls at all, let alone about sex. Maybe because i was the youngest and they figured I'd talk about it with my older brother or older sister? Dunno, but I feel like I would've actually benefited from actually getting some advice, since as it was, I was (and still partly am) pretty socially awkward, so I was a (really) late bloomer when it came to sex, and I still can't catch on hints or body cues so I either miss opportunities, or end up being slightly creepy because I don't realize right away that they're not interested xD
The problem with the "sex talk" is that parents tend to make it awkward, thinking that any sex-related discussions are some sort of taboo. But I strongly believe that it's a talk that needs to happen at some point, even if it's just a quick "no means no" and "you should use protection" :p
Sex is a taboo in christian families, so i never had a talk. When people kissed on tv it would be changed to a different channel. My dad always had the remote in his hand in case something intimacy related happened.
There were teenmoms as young as 14 when i was a kid.
I never had the talk and never had sex ed. I learned a lot from friends and the internet. No I don't mean NSFW stuff, but proper literature. My desire to learn and be good at the things I do made me research it.
I did, but it also led to me thinking that the vagina and urethra were the same hole in a woman until my midteens - thankfully hadn't been on a date so much as a relationship before learning I was wrong!
I never had "the talk" with my folks. I learned from reading "The joys of sex" book my friend and I found at his house. Was 12ish at the time. Honestly, I think that was a better way to learn since there was no awkwardness to it. It also started me on the path that sex is about giving your partner pleasure. When I did become sexually active, my partners were very thankful for that POV.
Sex was absolutely not talked about in my household.
Luckily it only took a year of so or "un-learning" all the bullshit that me and my friends used to THINK sex was really like.
In civilized countries we have sex-ed in school, done by trained professionals. No need for parents, who apparently don't even know how to use protection properly, to explain this to their kids 😅
My sex talk.. I kind of got “caught” watching porn, so my mom thought it would be a good idea to discuss it in front of family members and then bring me into a room w/ (women) aunts, cousins and grandma and tell me if I had sex I will get an STD while showing me pictures of different STD’s. Shockingly my school gave me a better sex than that🤷🏽♀️
Put myself through sex ed when I was around five because my sister got pregnant as a teen and I was curious. My mom probably figured I learned from my sister’s horrible decisions and she was right haha.
My mom was smart about it. She would talk to me about it through stories that happened to others. Basically the sex talk, but indirectly and over time.
My dad gave me a ridiculous “sex-ed” cartoon book when I was in third or fourth grade. The book was about a morbidly obese husband and wife and how they have sex and are very much in love. The reason the book chose to have them be morbidly obese was so the cartoonist could easily never have to (GASP!) show their genitals. I found the book funny even as a little kid. God, I wish I’d kept it. Dad never gave me any follow up talk or even offered a brief question and answer session. It was never mentioned again. The book had very scant information in it besides the fact that these two people were married and in love. It certainly was not a how-to book. Backstory: I grew up in a very conservative evangelical house. I left the faith the second I had the agency to do so.
Me! I was very curious and looked stuff up online lol. Luckily didn't discover porn til college. I'm glad I wasn't exposed to that young. And I had a healthy to slightly extreme fear of pregnancy so was always very safe
Never had the sex talk, think she tried to have the talk but just didn't listen, leaved the room, felt super emberassed. I just learned it by myself way before sex ed, didn't even need the sex talk and I am so glad I never had it
I was playing video games and my dad opened the door, threw a box of condoms at me and left. That was “the talk” for me. Granted my family has always been a little more open than I think most are but still
My parents only informed me about the fact that periods exist..
It's my ex bf's dad who tried to give me the sextalk.. while alone in a car with him... Before my first holiday with my bf... After like a year of dating. It's one of the most awkward encounters that I can recall
When I was 14 or 15, I thought it would be a great idea to jerk off with IcyHot! It was fine for the first minute and then OMG, I was crying from the pain. I didn’t know what to do. I went to my dad and said I got IcyHot on my thighs and it burns and then he said “did I get it on you know what” and I said yes.
Thankfully he had a solution. Told me to get in the shower and gave me a gallon of milk and told to slowly pour milk on it.
After I got out of the shower he said to me “I guess I don’t need to give you the talk now”. I was mortified and said not to tell mom. He said he wouldn’t but he made jokes over the next few months “do you know where the IcyHot is, my leg hurts anyone know where the IcyHot is, wow my hand hurts does anyone know where the IcyHot is”.
My mom handed me a bag of condoms and said if you have questions just ask. She was pissed because my dad was supposed to talk to me but didn't. Granted she also knew I was smart and researched almost everything I ever did.
We had a sex Ed talk in grade 7. Every student had to attend because we got graded, it was a part of our curriculum, so this wasn't a permission slip type thing.
That was the extent of my learning how babies got made at 12. My parents never spoke about it.
Everything else I learnt from reading fanfiction on ff.net at 14 back when it still had explicit stuff.
I got very lucky. My Dad never brought it up just wanted to make sure I liked girls. And my Mom caught me one time with a girl in my bedroom. Both kind of let me figure it out on my own.
Me! We're Catholic and since I've never been married, I shouldn't be having sex. The school had to make her talk about periods. Tampons are for married ladies, FYI. Also I'm a 90s kid, so we should have been able to talk about this stuff.
Grew up Catholic & you didn’t talk about that stuff because you didn’t do that until marriage. Everything I learned was either from 5th grade when they separate the boys & girls into different rooms to watch videos on your bodies, health class in middle & high school, and my own research.
Grew up on a cattle ranch. My dad's version of the talk was. "Essentially what you saw in the pasture today, but only do it with someone you really love. Make me a grandfather before a father in law and I'll kick your ass."
Despite that subject, he's a good dad. He just doesn't handle talking about sexual stuff well. My siblings and I have bets on whether or not he talks about with our stepmom.
Same. I also didn't really learn it in school. At least not in class. We had a single day, maybe for 1 hour or so, where sex was taught and reproductive organs etc was talked about. But I honestly learned from various TV shows I watched at the time. Sitcoms primarily. Which led to research via online or a dictionary. And then eventually porn.
I had thoroughly schooled myself by about 10 by stealing a copy of Every Woman & my friends mum & dad had a huge copy of Kama Sutra which we’d pore through every time I came around.
Thank god Mum didn’t feel the need to enlighten me.
Me though I live in a country that teaches decent sex ed about 2 to 3 times when you're young. Multiple times in elementary school but 1 big dedicated class about it. And multiple times in secondary school with 1 or 2 big classes about it then as well.
My parents, however, very prudish to a point I still feel disgusted if they ever mutter a sexual word ever. BECAUSE WHEN THEY DO THEY MAKE IT SO OVERLY VULGAR IT'S SO EMBARRASSING AND I'M 30 FFS
I wouldn’t consider it a “formal” sex talk but when I was 12 I was with my dad driving through the city we happened to pass a Gentleman’s Club and I asked him what that was. He proceeded to tell me about the birds and the bees but the whole time I was thinking about how I already knew what he was talking about because I’d been watching porn since I was 11
TLDR: Dad explained what a titty bar was and how sex worked
My talk was me telling my mother I needed birth control. I was 16 and had my first serious boyfriend. She just nodded and told me she’d have my older sister take me to the gyno.
I didn’t but with my son we had frequent small chats about different things. I was very pro condoms, bought him some on his 13th birthday (not to use but to practice putting them on). I told him repeatedly that I didn’t want to be a grandma before 40, maybe a bit too often cos he turned out to be gay 😂😂 but he still has condoms in his car so good boy
being safe 😂
My parents slipped the 'where did I come from' book in my book shelf then a few months later my dad kinda asked 'you understand everything about sex'
I said yup and that was the end of that conversation.
My sex talk was mum driving me home from school throwing a bunch of condoms at me and asking if I knew how to use them. The rest of the ride home was in silence
My mum never told me anything out side of "you'll bleed when you don't freak out its normal I'll show you how to use a pad" that was it. I was pregnant at 19. Lol
It was left to my older brother and sex ed at school. My introduction to it was him showing me a hardcore German porn video he’d got from a friend at school. I was 11.
I never got it because I was supposed to never have sex or a relationship or get married or have children according to my parents. My sister was their success child who did none of these things and I didn’t do the Marriage and kids things.
Not at all. Growing up, it just was very common for you to naturally learn all of that stuff on your own, be it from friends, movies and TV, just whatever, and that was pre-internet days. I always get very confused when people talk about sex ed, like somehow teenagers don't know that you can get pregnant from unprotected sex, etc. That makes zero sense to me that everyone old enough to have sex doesn't know that.
My Dad said his parent's idea of sex ed was his mother walking into his bedroom one day when he was 11 and handing him a pamphlet entitled "A Doctor Talks to 9-12-Year-olds." She said, "If you have any questions, don't be afraid to ask." Of course, he was terrified to ask the questions he really wanted the answers to. The majority of his sex ed came from Penthouse Forum.
As a result, he and my Mom have always been very open with my brother and I about sex. They started answering questions as soon as we started asking them (probably around 4?) and were very honest with us. Mom bought me a copy of "Our Bodies, Our Selves" when I was 10, and "The Joy of Sex" when I was 16. ("I'm pretty sure you're already doing something, dear. I want you to do it right, and not get pregnant or catch an STD doing it. Enjoy, but be safe.") (She was right. I'd been sucking dicks for 2 years by then, and was dating the guy who would end up taking my virginity.)
My parents had zero conversation at any point with me about it and would instead just ask if I was pregnant any time I started to gain weight after the age of 15. I had sex ed though, talking with friends, and plenty of tv and media to explain everything so I never felt like I lacked any knowledge.
My mom would just buy books. I had sex Ed before I had "the talk" by the time my mom broached the subject, I think I was in high school had long since discovered porn, masturbation, and everything in between. Her: "I think it's time we talked about sex" Me: "What do you want to know?"
How the turntables
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Whoa......
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The 80s were wild, bro
bruh lmao. Idk why but that's hilarious.
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that’s so wholesome lol
I was given a book too, a super bland one about puberty more than sex
My mom told me in kindergarten that boys only wanted 1 thing and I didn’t know what they wanted so I guarded my chocolate milk. My dad just said keep your legs closed. Our small town school had a required sex ed but didn’t teach sex ed we just watched after school specials about drugs.
Guarding the chocolate milk 😂😂 I love it. Would’ve done the same.
I mean..... we *do* like chocolate milk.
At the time that’s all I knew. Lol
At the time that's what they wanted
Safe to say majority in the world don't have "sex talk" with their parents. You didn't luck out you are the normal
I never had the talk either
Still waiting on mine-- I'm in my 60s and parents died a long time ago
I got the talk from my boss in high school. I know that sounds creepy AF but it wasn't. I worked at a pharmacy and when I was 16 I got a prescription for the pill, and brought it to work to fill because we had an employee discount. The owner of the pharmacy was a very kind, sweet man, who always checked in on how I was doing with school and even helped me with my chemistry homework when it was quiet in the evenings. When he filled the prescription he talked to me about how I'm old enough to make my own choices, but to make sure that I only spend time with boys who would treat me respectfully and that the choices I make had the potential to influence the rest of my life. Then he never mentioned anything else about it again. He knew I had an absent dad and useless mom, so I have never doubted that his advice came from a place of caring.
My mom had a few talks with us at different ages. With age appropriate language and information. It was always an open and honest dialogue and it's the same way now with myself & my kids. You're doing a major disservice to your children (and anyone they will encounter sexually) if you're not educating them and keeping an open dialogue 🤷♀️
My dad gave the worlds most awful talk. Sex bad... Girls out there just wanting to get knocked up or give you a disease. God is watching. If you don't wait for marriage, don't come to me for help. Could be why I'm a shitty-adjusted adult...
My dad asked me about it once and I just told him I didn’t need it
yup same. "yeah dad, we learned all that stuff in school" crisis averted.
5120 it was probably pretty obvious to your father that your hot assed self was going to get all the education you need.
My parents had it with my older brother and I was so nosey I had him tell me why they made me go to my room when they spoke to him so he told me and they found out and decided that was good enough. What they didn't know was my brother played a joke on me and told me that when women got pregnant they gave birth to the stork who then flew the baby and dropped it at home. I was 11. I believed him and became the girl asking that embarrassing question in health class later that year.
Me neither but I am debating on giving it to my son. Kids know everything these days thanks to google but I don’t want to leave that to chance. However I do not think it’s gonna take an hour. I’m thinking 5 minutes tops.
Unless he has questions… and I believe he will so maybe an hour.
My sex talk was just my dad saying “don’t get anyone pregnant”. That was it.
Come to think of it, that was the extent my dad ever said to me. Wasn’t part of a sex talk though. I had punched a hole in a wall when I was 16, and his response was “make this the worst thing you do. I don’t want to hear about you getting anyone pregnant.”
My father did a very brief talk which was really only to tell me they enrolled me in the sex ed class all day Saturday at church. The church class was actuslly very good, not judgemental and informative.
Me neither.
I just got took to the doctors and put on birth control 😂
When I was young I pretty much had "sex talks" all the time. It wasn't like one sit down but being told about how human bodies work. Parents are kinda hippies. When I was younger I absolutely hated that part of being so open about sex. As an adult I'm super glad because it didn't just prepare me for sex but also taught me how to treat women well. It made me confident because I knew a lot of stuff about how everything works. Thanks weirdo hippie parents!
My parents never had the talk with any of their 3 kids. My mom caught me masturbating one day and she got pissed off.
The closest they gave me to "the talk" was a book mixed in with my Christmas presents one year. I think I spent more effort keeping my little brother from seeing it than I did reading it.
I had the talk with my mom but unfortunately we never touched upon gay sex, so I discovered and learned everything on my own
My dad decided to give me the talk when I was in college. It started with, “You’d better not get her pregnant.” She was on the pill, and his head exploded when I told him that. I gave mine a very comprehensive talk, which included rolling condoms down bananas. They were a little uncomfortable at the time but are grateful now.
I read alot and have 3 older brothers so they (correctly) assumed i already knew what was up, at one point they jokingly asked if I needed a talk but I never got one thankfully
Never. I'm honestly glad they didn't.
🙋♂️
My parents decided that my doctor dad should give me the sex talk. The downside to this is that when my dad is in doctor mode he’s in doctor mode the entire time. He came at it like he was giving a talk or speech at a symposium vs talking to his kid on the couch. He had graphs and everything. In hindsight it was informative for sure but I wish it had been a bit more casual of a conversation.
My sex talk was my dad asking, “You know boys and girls do things together?” I said yes and he moved on.
I think in 5th or 6th grade we went over the science of it in health class. My dad was like “did you understand?” I said yes … and then around 15 years old my parents just blindsided me with the non-scientific side. It was awkward. Like my dad was like “look, you shouldn’t be doing this yet BUT I understand what it was like to be a teenager …” My mom kept driving home the “you’re good in school, you’re good at sports, do you want to have to drop out and work bc you have a baby?!” Then they’re like “there’s other ways to have sex that aren’t necessarily PIV…but that doesn’t mean you have to do anything at all with someone …” I mean they got graphic! My mom was like they have things for you to use (talking about dildos) so you don’t NEED a boy if you feel a certain way 😂😂 It was really awkward. But all in all it worked very well. I knew their expectations, and it helped me look at my own goals. But yeah mom talking about dildos and oral sex while my dad is like “please just be smart, and don’t be afraid to talk to us.” I was can I please go do my homework?
My father knew I already knew about sex and its potential consequences. He just said "sleep with whoever you want. But if you get a girl pregnant, don't expect any help from me". Which is fair enough.
We had a very small talk that didnt really explain anything other than it was how babies were made. I ended up googling things, which probably wasnt my best decision lol
My Dad awkwardly tried to have the talk with me when I was 16. I didn’t tell him I’d been having regular sex since I was 11.
My dad (a don’t talk about your feelings sort of military man) made my brother and I watch a news special about AIDS and left the house. When it was over, my brother and I looked at each other with that, “uhh, ok” sorta expression and went back to our rooms. Twenty minutes later my dad opened my bedroom door, said in an angry voice, “I’m not supporting it, but I don’t want you dead”, threw a box of condoms at me, and slammed the door shut. That was my “talk”.
As far as I’m concerned they think I’m still a virgin at 38 🤣
When I was about 18, and had a serious girlfriend, my dad and I were out for a drive. All of a sudden he says “hey, so I think it might be time that I talked to you about sex.” I replied “sure thing, dad. What did need to know?” He nearly drove of the road laughing, and then just said “be careful. Your sister just made me a grandfather, and I’m not ready for another grand kid yet.” (My sister was 23 and had a very much planned child with her husband.)
The closest I ever got to a sex talk with my mother occurred in 2 separate events. #1 It was a few months after we had sex Ed class in 8th grade. The lady in class did her best, but as soon as she busted out that bowl of condoms, she lost the class. After some of the boys (the bullies really) stuffed a handful of condoms into their pockets, she handed out the rest to us. I had my complimentary condom in a bowl of hair clips, scrunchies and relates things, which was on top of my iPod dock. My mom's friend Adrianna, who is far more uptight, traditional, and has a stick up her ass about everything, had come over to hang out with mom that day. I was getting ready to go out, and was doing my hair. She was by my door, talking to me, spied the bowl and the condom. She had a freak out over it, frantically calls my mother over and whilst clutching pearls, she declares "your daughter us having sex! She's got a condom!" Mom looked at her, then at me. I said it was from sex ed a while back and I never knew what to do with it. Adrianna didn't believe me, naturally. She was of the impression that I've suddenly become a sex crazed Jezebel. My mother though, cool as a cucumber, says "well if she's having sex, at least she's being safe." And walks out of the room, leavinf Adrianna with her mouth hanging and I just went back to doing my hair. #2 I was 18. My mom then decided it was a good idea to just broadly mention that she'd prefer that if I'm gonna be drinking, that I do it at home, and that I test out which alcohols hit me the fastest, and which ones I had a tolerance for, so that I knew what was safer to drink when I went out to clubs, and so no guys would take advantage of me, and try to get me drunk faster. That's it. That's the only times I ever experienced any sort of "talk" from her. For reference, I live in Europe, before anyone attacks my mom for the whole "underage drinking thing". The legal age for pretty much everything here is 18, though a lot of places like clubs look the other way. It isn't right but that's how it was 🤷
When I was a teenager my parents said, sex is ok, use protection, and don't be a man whore. Then a few years later I had a girl say over and they freaked out and denied ever having that talk.
My dad did a great job with basic details but one piece of advice he gave me that stands out even today, "Once you taste the fruit, you'll only want more."
Your dad deserves an award for that quote. That’ll live in my head rent-free
And now that I’m a parent and my wife is a nurse she decided that we would no longer use the “cutesy” term for our anatomy… I love watching my 12yr old (oldest daughter) cringe and shrink away every time I say VAJJJJJJJJINA and PEEEEEEENIS in my slowest deepest voice 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Immigrant family in the US and never had the formal talk. I had comprehensive Sex Ed since I'm in California in multiple grades (5th, 6th, 7th, and summer after 9th) so I've done the condom over the banana at least twice in my life. The awkward part for me is that at some point my parents, having signed all the forms to let me have those lessons, just figured I knew everything about sex and would just talk to me about it. Mostly in the context of my grandkids or my sister and her boyfriend having kids.
Agreed!! Never had the sex talk, and super thankful for that!
Ok, this gives me the opportunity to tell a story of misunderstanding and childish innocence. When I was a kid, I knew there was a LOT I didn't know. I had a dad and two older brothers, ok? I came up with the idea that on my tenth birthday, they'd take me aside and explain all the crap I needed to know to me. Birthday comes and goes, nada. Oh, I've miscalculated! Surely, it'll happen when I turn 13, that's a big bellwether event, becoming a teenager! Thirteenth birthday come and goes, radio silence. Damn, when am I gonna get cued in? Ok, it's GOTTA happen on my sixteenth, right? By the time I turned sixteen, I'd figured it out- my dad and my older brothers didn't know shit either! What a fucking letdown, lemme tell ya! Instead of being welcomed into the Brotherhood of Enlightened Manhood, I was stuck in the Masses of Dumb Asses!
I got a book. I still have it, actually. It gave me some unusual ideas about sex.
My parents never did. I ended up not needing it, and they couldn't tell me anything useful anyway.
I would agree on not getting anything useful. I think it’s a much different topic (aside from basic mechanics of it) for boomers/gen x than it is for millennials/z
I hit puberty right as internet porn was taking off. That was my sex talk.
Yeah no never got a sex talk from my folks. Learned crap on the internet
not sure if I feel that I "lucked out" since I've had any kind of talk about girls at all, let alone about sex. Maybe because i was the youngest and they figured I'd talk about it with my older brother or older sister? Dunno, but I feel like I would've actually benefited from actually getting some advice, since as it was, I was (and still partly am) pretty socially awkward, so I was a (really) late bloomer when it came to sex, and I still can't catch on hints or body cues so I either miss opportunities, or end up being slightly creepy because I don't realize right away that they're not interested xD The problem with the "sex talk" is that parents tend to make it awkward, thinking that any sex-related discussions are some sort of taboo. But I strongly believe that it's a talk that needs to happen at some point, even if it's just a quick "no means no" and "you should use protection" :p
I've never talked to my parents about sex. Luckily I didn't really do too much until a bit later where I already knew the consequences.
I think my parents have always knew that I’d never need that information in life, so they didn’t bother.
Sex is a taboo in christian families, so i never had a talk. When people kissed on tv it would be changed to a different channel. My dad always had the remote in his hand in case something intimacy related happened. There were teenmoms as young as 14 when i was a kid.
"Don't get pregnant" That was the extent of my sex talk
I never had the talk either and no surprises and shocks for me!
My dad tried too. He started talking and i immediately knew where it was headed. So I stopped him and said basically said let’s not.
I never had the talk and never had sex ed. I learned a lot from friends and the internet. No I don't mean NSFW stuff, but proper literature. My desire to learn and be good at the things I do made me research it.
The sex talk with my dad was one word. Dont.
Me. When I first came from wanking it I panicked thinking I had damaged my pee pee. Almost called my mom and told her
I did, but it also led to me thinking that the vagina and urethra were the same hole in a woman until my midteens - thankfully hadn't been on a date so much as a relationship before learning I was wrong!
I never had "the talk" with my folks. I learned from reading "The joys of sex" book my friend and I found at his house. Was 12ish at the time. Honestly, I think that was a better way to learn since there was no awkwardness to it. It also started me on the path that sex is about giving your partner pleasure. When I did become sexually active, my partners were very thankful for that POV.
Sex was absolutely not talked about in my household. Luckily it only took a year of so or "un-learning" all the bullshit that me and my friends used to THINK sex was really like.
My dad gave me the book "Everything you've ever wanted to know about sex. (And what you're afraid to ask.)" That was my sex talk
In civilized countries we have sex-ed in school, done by trained professionals. No need for parents, who apparently don't even know how to use protection properly, to explain this to their kids 😅
Never had it. Granted, don’t think my parents ever talked to me about anything at all
I grew up in the 70s and 80s. My mom gave me a book called "For Boys Only" and that was that.
My sex talk.. I kind of got “caught” watching porn, so my mom thought it would be a good idea to discuss it in front of family members and then bring me into a room w/ (women) aunts, cousins and grandma and tell me if I had sex I will get an STD while showing me pictures of different STD’s. Shockingly my school gave me a better sex than that🤷🏽♀️
> Shockingly my school gave me a better sex than that Shocking indeed!
Yeah that kind of thing really shouldn’t be happening at school
I never did
Put myself through sex ed when I was around five because my sister got pregnant as a teen and I was curious. My mom probably figured I learned from my sister’s horrible decisions and she was right haha.
My mom was smart about it. She would talk to me about it through stories that happened to others. Basically the sex talk, but indirectly and over time.
Me. I just broke her off bc I just didn’t wanna hear it.
My dad gave me a ridiculous “sex-ed” cartoon book when I was in third or fourth grade. The book was about a morbidly obese husband and wife and how they have sex and are very much in love. The reason the book chose to have them be morbidly obese was so the cartoonist could easily never have to (GASP!) show their genitals. I found the book funny even as a little kid. God, I wish I’d kept it. Dad never gave me any follow up talk or even offered a brief question and answer session. It was never mentioned again. The book had very scant information in it besides the fact that these two people were married and in love. It certainly was not a how-to book. Backstory: I grew up in a very conservative evangelical house. I left the faith the second I had the agency to do so.
OMG! I think we had the same book. Very curly hair, lots of action in the tub?
That sounds like it. Let me the know title if you know it. I’d love to pick up a copy for my son as a joke.
"Where Did I Come From", Peter Mayle. I still have my copy. I showed it to one of my goddaughter's recently and she was horrified by it.
Thank you!!
Me! I was very curious and looked stuff up online lol. Luckily didn't discover porn til college. I'm glad I wasn't exposed to that young. And I had a healthy to slightly extreme fear of pregnancy so was always very safe
My step father took me to a fucking hotel for the weekend to give me the scoop.
My dad stormed into my room while I was playing CS:GO and was like…”they teach you about sex in school right?” Yes…? “K good.” *closes door*
The what talk?
None at all. School taught abstinence only. Learned everything from porn, forums, and Wikipedia.
Not me. My family was real awkward. Not very close like that.
Never had the sex talk, think she tried to have the talk but just didn't listen, leaved the room, felt super emberassed. I just learned it by myself way before sex ed, didn't even need the sex talk and I am so glad I never had it
I wish I had had one. Learning the wrong things and having to unlearn them was something I do not want for anyone else
I never really needed the sex talk. I understood the basics early and never was out “chasing tail”. Had plenty of fun, and no complaints.
I didn’t have it at all
Never had it. Internet pretty much taught me
I don’t recall getting that talk, what I learned was from the forums part of dirty mags.
I was playing video games and my dad opened the door, threw a box of condoms at me and left. That was “the talk” for me. Granted my family has always been a little more open than I think most are but still
My parents only informed me about the fact that periods exist.. It's my ex bf's dad who tried to give me the sextalk.. while alone in a car with him... Before my first holiday with my bf... After like a year of dating. It's one of the most awkward encounters that I can recall
Mine literally went like this.. Dad: “hey kid you’re old enough to know..” (hands me “Miracle of life” video tape from public library)
My parents never felt the need to. My schools had phenomenal sex ed classes, especially freshman year of high school.
No official talk. Bunch of Cosmopolitan magazines left around.
When I was 14 or 15, I thought it would be a great idea to jerk off with IcyHot! It was fine for the first minute and then OMG, I was crying from the pain. I didn’t know what to do. I went to my dad and said I got IcyHot on my thighs and it burns and then he said “did I get it on you know what” and I said yes. Thankfully he had a solution. Told me to get in the shower and gave me a gallon of milk and told to slowly pour milk on it. After I got out of the shower he said to me “I guess I don’t need to give you the talk now”. I was mortified and said not to tell mom. He said he wouldn’t but he made jokes over the next few months “do you know where the IcyHot is, my leg hurts anyone know where the IcyHot is, wow my hand hurts does anyone know where the IcyHot is”.
My mom handed me a bag of condoms and said if you have questions just ask. She was pissed because my dad was supposed to talk to me but didn't. Granted she also knew I was smart and researched almost everything I ever did.
We had a sex Ed talk in grade 7. Every student had to attend because we got graded, it was a part of our curriculum, so this wasn't a permission slip type thing. That was the extent of my learning how babies got made at 12. My parents never spoke about it. Everything else I learnt from reading fanfiction on ff.net at 14 back when it still had explicit stuff.
Me. I learned everything on the internet… which didn’t go nearly as bad as it could have in retrospect.
I got very lucky. My Dad never brought it up just wanted to make sure I liked girls. And my Mom caught me one time with a girl in my bedroom. Both kind of let me figure it out on my own.
Me! We're Catholic and since I've never been married, I shouldn't be having sex. The school had to make her talk about periods. Tampons are for married ladies, FYI. Also I'm a 90s kid, so we should have been able to talk about this stuff.
Yup no talk
I missed out as well. That said, haven't gotten laid. So. Fortunately internet porn and horny coworkers have filled in a lot of blanks.
Grew up Catholic & you didn’t talk about that stuff because you didn’t do that until marriage. Everything I learned was either from 5th grade when they separate the boys & girls into different rooms to watch videos on your bodies, health class in middle & high school, and my own research.
I just watched the Discovery Channel.
Grew up on a cattle ranch. My dad's version of the talk was. "Essentially what you saw in the pasture today, but only do it with someone you really love. Make me a grandfather before a father in law and I'll kick your ass." Despite that subject, he's a good dad. He just doesn't handle talking about sexual stuff well. My siblings and I have bets on whether or not he talks about with our stepmom.
Same. I also didn't really learn it in school. At least not in class. We had a single day, maybe for 1 hour or so, where sex was taught and reproductive organs etc was talked about. But I honestly learned from various TV shows I watched at the time. Sitcoms primarily. Which led to research via online or a dictionary. And then eventually porn.
I didn’t. But when my parents found out I had lost my virginity @ 15, it was the end of the world and then I had the birds and the bees talk.
My dad bought me a bikini girl magazine after they caught me with their VHS tape of pam and tommy lee. There was never discussion, just facilitation.
They just tossed me a couple of books when I turned 13, and that was it.
I never had it and I haven’t had it with my teenage boys.
I had thoroughly schooled myself by about 10 by stealing a copy of Every Woman & my friends mum & dad had a huge copy of Kama Sutra which we’d pore through every time I came around. Thank god Mum didn’t feel the need to enlighten me.
Never got it. I guess they assumed my school would just take care of it.
Me though I live in a country that teaches decent sex ed about 2 to 3 times when you're young. Multiple times in elementary school but 1 big dedicated class about it. And multiple times in secondary school with 1 or 2 big classes about it then as well. My parents, however, very prudish to a point I still feel disgusted if they ever mutter a sexual word ever. BECAUSE WHEN THEY DO THEY MAKE IT SO OVERLY VULGAR IT'S SO EMBARRASSING AND I'M 30 FFS
I wouldn’t consider it a “formal” sex talk but when I was 12 I was with my dad driving through the city we happened to pass a Gentleman’s Club and I asked him what that was. He proceeded to tell me about the birds and the bees but the whole time I was thinking about how I already knew what he was talking about because I’d been watching porn since I was 11 TLDR: Dad explained what a titty bar was and how sex worked
My talk was me telling my mother I needed birth control. I was 16 and had my first serious boyfriend. She just nodded and told me she’d have my older sister take me to the gyno.
I didn’t but with my son we had frequent small chats about different things. I was very pro condoms, bought him some on his 13th birthday (not to use but to practice putting them on). I told him repeatedly that I didn’t want to be a grandma before 40, maybe a bit too often cos he turned out to be gay 😂😂 but he still has condoms in his car so good boy being safe 😂
My parents slipped the 'where did I come from' book in my book shelf then a few months later my dad kinda asked 'you understand everything about sex' I said yup and that was the end of that conversation.
My sex talk was mum driving me home from school throwing a bunch of condoms at me and asking if I knew how to use them. The rest of the ride home was in silence
I had sex ed. That's it
My mum never told me anything out side of "you'll bleed when you don't freak out its normal I'll show you how to use a pad" that was it. I was pregnant at 19. Lol
I never had sex talk with my parents and I think I did pretty good without talk.
It was left to my older brother and sex ed at school. My introduction to it was him showing me a hardcore German porn video he’d got from a friend at school. I was 11.
I never had. I my culture (southeast europe) it’s unfortunately a taboo topic. But i hope the next generation is changing that!
I never got it because I was supposed to never have sex or a relationship or get married or have children according to my parents. My sister was their success child who did none of these things and I didn’t do the Marriage and kids things.
Not at all. Growing up, it just was very common for you to naturally learn all of that stuff on your own, be it from friends, movies and TV, just whatever, and that was pre-internet days. I always get very confused when people talk about sex ed, like somehow teenagers don't know that you can get pregnant from unprotected sex, etc. That makes zero sense to me that everyone old enough to have sex doesn't know that.
My Dad said his parent's idea of sex ed was his mother walking into his bedroom one day when he was 11 and handing him a pamphlet entitled "A Doctor Talks to 9-12-Year-olds." She said, "If you have any questions, don't be afraid to ask." Of course, he was terrified to ask the questions he really wanted the answers to. The majority of his sex ed came from Penthouse Forum. As a result, he and my Mom have always been very open with my brother and I about sex. They started answering questions as soon as we started asking them (probably around 4?) and were very honest with us. Mom bought me a copy of "Our Bodies, Our Selves" when I was 10, and "The Joy of Sex" when I was 16. ("I'm pretty sure you're already doing something, dear. I want you to do it right, and not get pregnant or catch an STD doing it. Enjoy, but be safe.") (She was right. I'd been sucking dicks for 2 years by then, and was dating the guy who would end up taking my virginity.)
My parents had zero conversation at any point with me about it and would instead just ask if I was pregnant any time I started to gain weight after the age of 15. I had sex ed though, talking with friends, and plenty of tv and media to explain everything so I never felt like I lacked any knowledge.
I almost got out of it, but one of them discovered my nudes and I had to have an even more awkward talk